Redemption
by skrybble
Summary: /Definition: deliverance from sin; salvation/ KotOR 1, LSF; spoilers included up through end of the game, along with plenty of angst, irony, and near-death experiences. Finally COMPLETE!
1. Prologue

**My first fanfic! First off, I'm going to take a moment to feel proud of myself...  
Okay. Done. This is a (later note: _ridiculously long_) KotOR LSF fic, for anyone who still reads that stuff/plays the game *coughcoughme...***

****Note--anyone who's trying to avoid spoilers (though it's a little late for most of us) might want to skip this chapter...

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**Disclaimer: Bioware's, not mine.**

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**Prologue: (**_**theater**_**) an introductory scene, preceding the first act**

There were five people in the room.

There were six bodies.

Five of the bodies were standing, circled around a small and simple cot. The sixth lay there, subject to all of their guarded gazes. Her eyes were closed, and she lay motionless, except for the small, almost imperceptible intake of breath every other moment: the only proof she was alive. Despite her appearance, however, nothing short of comatose, she was physically fine. Scar tissue was the worst sign of the trauma the skin and bones before them had seen. Her body still looked like some mad artist, in a flood of inspiration, had marred it with lines that hadn't quite erased, but it still bore none of the horrific wounds it should have.

Well. Not visibly, anyway.

She had not stirred for a while, not like the beginning. Then, she had woken often, her moods volatile—sometimes bewildered, sometimes violently angry (actually, often, if they were being totally honest), sometimes, most surprising of all. Sometimes, she would simply stare at the ceiling, her face pensive and unreadable, until they were unsure if she was thinking or simply lost in her own mind.

However, as the memories faded, so did the character, and she soon stopped waking. There would be nothing there if she had. She was alive, technically, but she was no longer a person.

A diminutive figure, green with large, bat-like ears, stood closest to the girl. All the others, in forming their ring, had unconsciously given themselves at least a foot of room between themselves and the cot. They were still afraid of her, although they would never admit it. Only the littlest one was not afraid—necessity would not allow him to be.

Every wary gaze was trained on him as he stood with one hand held out, eyes closed. Something almost was swirling from the girl's forehead into the center of his palm, flowing like water through the skin. It was less tangible than mist, of course, but had a thousand times the composition. Flashes of color, blurred faces and landscapes were embroidered through it, a tapestry of the woman's life.

Like watching light fracture through a crystal, one could squint at it and pick out scenes from particular angles, but from afar it was simply incoherent. The youngest Jedi, a dark-haired girl with icy eyes, was unable to help thinking how it was almost sad—one of the most notorious prodigies of the galaxy, everything that made her herself, passing unceremoniously through the air before them. This was a life they were seeing, and yet all it seemed to be was a blur of visual traffic. It felt invasive, almost. None of what they saw was meant for their eyes.

But it was necessary. This was their only option: she understood that, and she had faith in them. Her reservations were not strong enough to turn her away from the spectacle; she watched with fascination and in silence, along with the other three beside her. She had never seen memories before, and suspected she never would again.

However, captivating as it was, she was struggling to ignore the unsettling draining sensation, both in the back of her mind and the pit of her stomach. They'd already explained to her about bonds, about the connection. She hoped it would fade. The thought of being tied to this woman, harmless as she and her memories appeared, was half thrilling and half terrifying, and the fact that it was thrilling at all disturbed her.

The small Jedi's brow furrowed slightly as he reached further into the mind. It had been much harder than any of them could have foreseen to erase all the memories. They had hoped it would be like a tree, where they could trim off all the overgrowth and graft the new mind into hers, letting the two simply grow together… but, of course, she wouldn't be that predictable. Her mind was more like a spiderweb, if anything—the memories were tangled and ensnared into deep corners, and near impossible to remove. They had to cut away all the experiences, and yet without losing the character: a difficult job, and requiring incredible precision.

Moreover, they all felt the need to be even more careful, because of how damaged she was already. The worst of her wounds were invisible: her mind had been shattered beyond repair, broken a thousand times worse than her body. The Jedi had to remind themselves of this often: that it wasn't erasing her; it was saving her. Trying to patch her fractured mind back together could only serve to destroy her completely.

What had surprised them most, throughout the process, were the memories she seemed to cling to tightest. All the ones of the darkness, her time after she had fallen, were lost or removed with surprising ease. The same applied to her childhood before the Academy, short as it had been, and to her lessons thereafter. However, she had held on to her memories of friends and allies with stubborn possessiveness. This held especially true for her memories of best friend, before their fall.

Her determination to keep hold of those reflected her character before, and it gave all the elders in the room a feeling of nostalgia. Even then, what seemed like a lifetime ago, this girl who now lay before them—dead by all rights—had been loyal to a fault to those she deemed her friends. Some of the Jedi were eager to point out how this could mean she hadn't necessarily lost herself.

The obvious counterargument was also rooted in her ruined mind: the memories of her and her friend's quest from before, their slow path to the dark side. These were less like treasures she clung to, and more like stains. They had tried to erase them as best they could. They were not sure they had succeeded.

And yet, trying as that had been, this was the hardest part. They had taken her memories in the order they came, most recent fading to the first of all. It had been taken as a given that they would leave her with her youngest recollections; those could be woven easily into the prosthetic mind. However, anything of her time in the Order had to go, from the time she'd joined them at age seven.

The little Jedi was seeing all that the other four saw, and more, but with none of the chaos that amount of information should have presented. He saw grass and fields that seemed never-ending through her wide eyes; he saw himself and his friends, painted with heroism—this, he reminded himself, would later fade; and worst of all, he heard her young, innocent laugh at something her new friend Alek had just said. The boy was as gawky as the Jedi remembered, built with too much knee and elbow, but she seemed to see something in him nonetheless.

And now… _here were the two of them, racing down a path to the Enclave…_

_Here was the arrival __on Dantooine__, with she herself barely more than a toddler. She recalled with startling clarity stepping off the starship and eyeing the surrounding nervously, all the while clinging to a faceless parent's hand… _

_Here was the flight there—she had never been in a starship before, and spent the entire ride staring out the window. Later she would look at the planets with a calculating eye, plotting attacks and ambushes and tactics, but this memory now held nothing but wonder…_

_And then, blurry with confusion, came the conversation she'd overheard between her parents, and a small voice—her own?—asking, "_What's 'Force-sensitive' mean?_"…_

_Enough_, he thought desperately, his hand spasming down with a jerk of protest. Surely he'd taken enough memories—and partially, he knew, he wanted to see no more. This wasn't a monster whose eyes he had been looking through. This woman, however vicious and corrupt, had once been a child, and it was worse than seeing her as a mastermind had bee.

His eyes, two black twinkles in a leathery face, slid open. The girl on the bed gave a jerk as the string of memory disappeared, and then a long sigh, that, if romanticized, could have been called peaceful. The small figure looked up at the others, and his voice was almost—_almost_—mournful, as he murmured, "It is done."

They all looked at each other now, the older faces set masklike and inscrutable. The youngest, the dark-haired girl, looked uncertain as to how to act, so she settled for the small, reserved nods of the others.

"Her mind is clean?" pressed the dark-skinned man.

/Empty/ corrected a red-skinned Twi'lek quietly. /It is empty./

A tall, sour-looking man gave the Twi'lek a sharp look, but he simply shrugged, his face slightly unapologetic.

"Then… the other memories?" asked the dark-skinned man, breaking the sudden tension as he turned to the smallest one.

The little Jedi nodded. They had created a new mind for her, new memories to fit in the place of the old ones. Of course, they had wanted to make her simple, a one-dimensional soldier to serve them eagerly, but she had never been that way before. Though they could have forced the character into place, it would be the same as trying to jam together mismatched puzzle pieces, and might damage the mind they had worked so hard to save.

So, they had created a new persona. It was more unpredictable, more unstable than the Republic soldier or scout they had envisioned, but it fit her. It was the opposite of who she had been, doubtless, but exactly the same.

The only thing left to do was to see if it would work.

The small Jedi would not show it, but he was tired, and his concentration could not afford to fail now. He nodded, and all the other elders moved closer in anticipation of the final task. The dark-haired girl backed away a little, shrinking into the corner.

The little Jedi, the ringleader, reached out a gnarled hand toward the girl on the bed, placing it on her forehead. He closed his eyes for a long moment, drawing a deep breath, and when he reopened them they glittered with a new level of perception. He saw more with the Force than with his eyes now, and felt the consciousnesses of the other Jedi brushing against his own, offering their assistance. He exhaled slowly, and then began to focus.

A sudden shimmering light appeared at his fingertips, curling outwards like smoke; it swirled along her skin, half liquid and half serpent. Slowly, it traced the sides of her face and wound down her neck, around her chest: encircling her. When it reached her heart, however, it suddenly began to sink through her skin.

She jerked suddenly, much more violently, spasms wracking her frame as her head jerked upright, eyelids flying open. The dark-haired girl, drawn by a morbid curiosity, stared at her eyes as they changed slowly from flashing gold to a milky white, blind and fearsome. Her fiery hair was tossed about as the convulsions traveled up her next, jarring her head from side to side.

/Should we stop?/ demanded the Twi'lek in an anxious murmur.

The small Jedi shook his head. "We cannot," he replied quietly.

And then, as suddenly as it had started, her thrashing stopped. She went limp, and relaxed onto the bed. Her eyes slipped closed again.

There was a pause, as they all held their breath.

"Did it work, Masters?" the dark-haired girl asked, the words slipping out before she could stop them. The sour man glared sharply at her, and the Twi'lek and the dark-skinned man shrugged uncertainly, but the little Jedi did not respond. His gaze was fixed intently on the girl's face, uncertain as to quite what he wanted to see.

And then her eyes drew slowly open.

They were no longer white, but a strong, intense blue, and they blinked a couple times before fixing on the people surrounding her with calm puzzlement. The red Twi'lek was the first to speak, surprising everyone as he stepped forward. The blue eyes darted to him, their gaze piercing. She sat up, almost defensively, as he came a step closer.

"Who are you?" he asked, almost afraid to hear what she would say.

There was a pause, even more suspenseful than the last, as she frowned slightly. Then she grinned calmly at him, and certainty was clear in her voice and expression as she replied.

"Ashi. Ashi Lucas."

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**Not too long, but prologues don't have to be, I hope…**


	2. Beginning

**Whoa!**

**I mean, I know I said 'reviews, please', but honestly, I wasn't expecting anything. Reassuring to know I'm not the only one out there who still loves KotOR. Huge thank you to everyone who reviewed... and then anyone who read at all.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Although I can dream.

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**Beginning: the point of time or space at which anything begins**

Sith fighters, instantaneous blurs of silver against a deep black galaxy, raced past the Endar Spire, stinging it with red bolts of energy. Bursts of fire exploded like volcanoes over the larger ship's surface, and after a moment one, and then both of its massive engines guttered out. With a terrifying shudder, the huge spaceship lurched and began a slow arc towards the glowing planet below.

The shudder rippled like an earthquake through the ship, heavy with promises of things to come, and a young woman, who had managed at long last to fall asleep in her new military bunk—_damn it, she simply couldn't get a good rest anywhere that didn't smell like the sleaze of humanity; and besides, how was she supposed to get any sleep with people patrolling past like freight trains every five minutes?_—was jerked roughly awake. She tumbled halfway off her bed, cracking her head against the side.

"Ow…" she moaned, her voice thick with sleep, lifting a clumsy hand to the back of her scalp. At that moment, however, the door jerked open, and a man in Republic armor came barreling in. He looked panicked, and, a moment later, extremely uncomfortable, as he caught sight of the half-dressed figure sprawled across the floor. Ashi, still nursing the new bruise on her head, managed to shoot him a withering glare.

She had hoped that she would at least get a half-decent bunkmate sharing her room, but no such luck. Trask was already utterly brainwashed by the military, not to mention about as inexperienced as they came—and that didn't just apply to war. She might be new to the fleet, but at least she could have survived on Nar Shaddaa for more than five minutes.

In short, the man had done very little to earn her respect. He also wasn't exactly doing himself any favors at the moment.

He bit his lip for a moment under her venomous glare as she got to her feet. Then, unable to wait any longer, he blurted, "It's an ambush! We've been ambushed by a Sith battle fleet, Ashi; the Endar Spire is under attack!"

"Can you fracking calm down for a second, Trask?" she demanded, vaguely annoyed at the thought of attacks, which usually didn't involve sleeping. "Come on," she added, seeing the look on his face, "deep breaths."

For what it was worth, he pulled it together quickly under her caustic gaze. "Hurry up, we don't have much time!" he continued, obviously trying furiously to pass along a message verbatim. "We have to get to the bridge to defend Bastila!"

At last, something he said seemed to capture her attention. "What? No way in hell!" she protested, tone labeling it the last word. In a moment she was rushing to pull on her clothes, which were, to her relief, not the neon orange armor Trask had on. No wonder the Republic was losing the war—who in space's name thought it was a good idea to wear a color that begged to be target practice? "That's going to be suicide!" she declared, adding mentally, _Even without armor like yours._

"You swore an oath just like everyone else on this ship," he reproached, diligently ignoring her mutter of 'oh, yes, the _oath_… goddamn _stupid_ oath…' "Now it's time to make good on it! I know what everyone's saying about you…"

He broke off as she turned and raised an eyebrow insinuatingly. "About your past, I mean," he amended hurriedly. "Smuggling illegal… uh… well, illegal everything, actually." He didn't dare meet her eyes as he spoke, but the words were audibly beginning to fade into questions. "And then when the Republic caught you, you put up a good fight…?"

Ashi laughed despite herself. "Oh, right. That was fun."

He raised his eyebrows at _fun_, but continued anyway, feeling half-obliged to let her know exactly what everyone else had been speculating about her—or, if not _everything_, then the less obscene parts. "They figured anyone who could fight and fly like that was a worthy addition, so they offered you a place and you took it to stay out of jail." He stopped uncertainly. "Well, that's what I heard. How much of that is true?"

She smirked with no humor. "Well, you missed the part where they took my ship and my vibroblade, and cuffed me." A dry laugh escaping her lips, she added, "They wouldn't go near me until then."

He grinned too, until another shudder shook the ship and he remembered what was happening. "Are you ready? We have to go!"

Ashi shook her head in disgust. "You really aren't going to give up, are you?" Not waiting for a response, she sighed, "Fine. I'll help. But _only_," she added quickly, "to get off the ship, all right? Maybe the Republic and I can be even then."

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, something like that."

She paused by the door, slipping her arms through the sleeves of a bright red and visibly worn jacket. The moment it was on, she reached under her bunk to grab hold of a vibroblade, swinging it experimentally as she stood. "Ready!" she announced brightly.

Trask nodded, with some relief. "Good, let's go," he said gesturing for the door. She had hardly raised a hand to punch in the lockdown code, however, when he interrupted, "No, wait!", holding up a hand. "I have a message on my comm."

With a tilt of his head, he indicated she listen to her wrist communicator. Ashi shook her head, muttering something unintelligible about 'red light, green light', but glanced towards her arm all the same. The speaker was a man, probably about ten years older than her, wearing a flight jacket and a worried expression.

"This is Carth Onasi. The Sith are threatening to overrun our position. We can't hold out long against their firepower! All hands to the bridge!"

Trask looked up as the message ended, looking even more anxious—which, given his previous expression, was saying something. "We better hurry!" he said, glancing with trepidation at the still-locked door. "That was Carth Onasi!"

Ashi had not been very impressed. "Never heard of him," she shrugged. "Is he important?"

Trask stared in shock. "You don't _know_ him? That's _Carth Onasi_…"

"Yes, I caught that," she interjected.

"…the commander of this ship; he's a famous Republic pilot! He's seen more battles than the rest of the crew put together." _Not much of an accomplishment_, thought Ashi, _if the rest of the crew was anything like Trask._ "If he says it's bad…" He trailed off, leaving the exact hopelessness of the situation to the imagination. "We better go."

But they had hardly made it into the hall when a group of soldiers, dressed in metallic silver and black, caught sight of them. All three held blaster at the ready, and all were covered in blood that didn't look like their own. "Damn," sighed Ashi, but Trask, ever the conformed soldier, exploded, "For the Republic!" and charged.

"Subtle," she muttered, but as her crewmate didn't seem to be listening, she raised her vibroblade and followed him. He had already taken out one of the Sith by the time she got close enough to help. She took another by surprise, slashing through his stomach while his attention was on Trask. The final one took a shot at her, but she dodged with uncanny ease, and, using the momentum, ran the blade into his chest. He keeled over with a nasty gurgling sound.

It was a bad sign, she thought, glancing down at the body. If the Sith were already here, even just small scout parties, then chances were the main areas of the ship really were overrun. The escape pods—which she'd memorized the location of, just in case her bad luck hadn't worn itself out yet—also happened to be at the other end of the ship, some bad planning that could very well end up fatal.

However, she had no intention of appearing worried to Trask. "First kill, Ulgo?" she asked, grinning wryly at him as he hurried nearer.

"They're getting what's coming to them," he replied stolidly, hand tightly clenched around the blaster handle. Ashi half-shrugged, vaguely surprised that he was handling himself so well.

There were more groups of troopers scattered throughout the rest of the ship, but nothing as bad as she'd expected. More disturbing, however, was the increasing amount of Republic corpses; all of them were impossible to miss, thanks to the neon armor, and if anything it made it seem like there were even more of them. Ashi had begun to suspect they'd missed most of the actual fighting, and when they reached the bridge, her suspicions were confirmed. Years of cynicism had made her skeptical to begin with, but Trask still growled in frustration when they reached the room to find it devoid of life, much less Jedi.

"Damn, Bastila isn't here," he hissed, rather unnecessarily. "They must have gone to the escape pods—we should head there too."

"I thought that was a good idea to begin with," Ashi threw in, but he seemed too tired to reply to the jab. Slapping a kolto patch on a wound, he beckoned her into the next room. A moment later, they both froze.

One of the doors had footsteps coming from behind it.

"There's someone behind here!" gasped Trask, taking a step towards it and then shuffling quickly back as he reconsidered.

"Really," muttered Ashi. "Did you work that one out all on your own?" But the retort shriveled and died in midair a moment later, when the door slid open before them. A man stood there: bald except for a goatee, and dressed all in black that threw his pale face even further into contrast. The purple veins latticing his skin stood out hideously, coiling like snakes buried in his flesh. As Trask and Ashi watched in horror, a red lightsaber extended from his hand, and he began to advance on them.

"A Dark Jedi!" Trask exclaimed. Ashi was about to marvel at how unnecessary the words had been, until Trask made his next move. In a sudden display of heroism, he tugged a blade from a sheath on his waist, moving in front of Ashi and shoving her back.

"I'll try to hold him off," he declared, voice trembling ever so slightly. "You get to the escape pods… go!"

He rushed forward, and as Ashi reached out a hand to try and stop him, the door slammed shut. She stared, for lack of anything else to do.

Trask was dead, now, as good as. For her. She felt like she had just been slapped. He wasn't a friend or anything—she hardly knew him, really—but he had been sort of… hmm. An ally, maybe. The point was that he was gone, just like that. _His first fight_, she remembered with horror, _and clearly his last_.

"No! Wait!" she shouted, eons too late. Quickly, however, she realized there was nothing to be done, as she heard a cackling laugh and rush of static, followed closely by a cry of pain. The next second the lightsaber began slicing an entrance for the Sith. Whirling in flat-out terror, Ashi ran.

Fear made her even faster than usual, and she managed to get a safe distance away before she felt the vibration against her wrist that indicated a comm message. Instinctively, her head snapped from side to side, checking that there was no one nearby, and then, satisfied, she bent to listen.

"This is Carth Onasi," murmured a voice, shot through with static and urgency. "I'm tracking your position by the Endar Spire's life support systems. Bastila's escape pod is away, and you're the last surviving crewmember. But I can't wait for you much longer; you'll have to hurry."

She was the only other person alive, and he couldn't spare a couple minutes to wait for her? Ashi snorted, unimpressed. "Is the way clear?" _Come on, just a little luck…_

He hesitated. "Eh… no. Down the hall, there's a room and then an entire squadron of Sith troopers on the other side of that door. You'll need to find some way to deal with them. There's also a single Sith heading…"

But just as he said it, she heard the metallic footsteps from around the corner, and ducked out of sight. "Oh, well, thanks for the fracking warning. Are you trying to get me killed?" she hissed. From the sudden silence, he sounded surprised—maybe even apologetic—but before he could reply, she muttered, "Damn: and now he _knows_ I'm here. Look, I'll be there in a second, all right?"

She cut him off mid-objection and ended the transmission, not a moment too soon. The Sith had been trying to sneak up on her while she was distracted, and lunged around the corner a moment after she stopped speaking. She parried part of his attack, but his vibroblade still slashed across her arm, ripping her jacket and breaking the skin. It was caustic, something adding an extra acerbity to the metal, and she felt her arm fall limp under the pain. She swallowed a yelp of pain with some difficulty, unwilling to give him the satisfaction of hearing it, and ran her vibroblade quickly through his stomach with her good hand. He sank to the ground, moaning, and she hurried past.

Most of the computers and door locks had been subject to blaster fire, shattered beyond even hope of repair—after all, easier to simply break all the Republic's technology than to leave potential weapons intact—but, her first good luck since she'd woken up, she managed find an undamaged console tucked alongside the door. It was simple to overload the power conduit one room over, if slower than usual: her left arm was aching badly, fingertips beginning to numb, and it was more of a hindrance than a help when it came to typing. However, slower was still enough; the group of Sith keeled to the floor and she darted through the doorway, skidding to a halt in the escape deck.

A man stood there who she recognized to be Trask's hero, the apparently famous Onasi. He was good-looking, she noticed, although the flight jacket—which turned out to be bright orange—was slightly off-putting.

"Private Lucas?" he demanded, the moment he saw her.

"_Ashi_ Lucas," she corrected tiredly; either he didn't miss the edge to her voice, or he simply wasn't in a mood to argue.

"Come on," he said quickly, his voice bearing her forward despite the pain beginning to spread through her shoulder, "we have to go! This ship is going to blow any second." Without waiting for an agreement—apparently, he was confident she wasn't going to object—he led her over to the last escape pod, motioning her to get in.

Ashi lowered herself carefully into the cramped space, raising her eyebrows as he clambered in to sit pressed against her. It jammed her arm against the side of the pod, which hurt more than she'd admit, but it was more the implications than the actual discomfort that bothered her.

"These are… uh, one-person," she said pointedly, shifting away from him: a fruitless effort, when she simply ended up further pressed against the wall. This irritated her even more, and somehow she managed to decide it was his fault as well.

He shrugged, uninterested in an argument. "Do you want to stay on the ship?"

At that, Ashi shook her head vigorously. "No way in hell. I didn't join your beloved Republic to get blown up in the very first action I see."

He grinned: it improved his features tremendously, although his face looked almost like it didn't know what to do with a smile. "Sister, you haven't seen nothing yet."

Then the pod ejected, and Ashi felt the acceleration begin as gravity wrapped its grip around them, eager to drag them down. They began to shake violently, and she felt Carth's arms wrap around her as they plunged towards the planet. She didn't even bother to pull away; she was too frozen with terror, and it was a little comforting, in an odd sort of way.

"You're right," she managed to reply, her voice shaking from the speed and juddering of the pod. Her head was spinning, and she couldn't feel her arm, but that must have been gravity, air pressure, _something_ he'd have a developed immunity to. "I haven't seen… _anything_."

And then they crashed, with a huge noise and a sudden impact that made her head snap sharply forward. She struck it against something and a fiery burst of pain exploded though her mind before, mercifully, she blacked out.

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Carth came to with a jarring shock. Instinctively, he glanced around, assessing the situation. He moved one arm and then the other, slowly and experimentally; he was shaken and bruised, but relatively unhurt. Unfortunately, the same couldn't be said for the girl—Lucas; Ashi, not Private. She was slumped next to him, motionless, which Carth found was never a good sign, and she looked in bad shape. Several small cuts crisscrossed her arms and face, and she had taken a fantastic blow to the side of her head that was bleeding freely, running down the seat—which he didn't care about—and his jacket—which he _did_. He hoped that was all that was wrong with her, through; internal injuries weren't so easy to fix, and he was no doctor. She obviously needed kolto, and a hell of a lot of it, but there was no helping that now.

He shifted around her, moving her carefully to the side—as limp as a rag doll, she offered no resistance—and kicked out, hard, at the exit door. It groaned reluctantly, and then, with a massive screech and thud, broke off and crashed to the ground. _Space_, Carth thought. _So much for subtlety. _He clambered quickly out of the pod, being careful not to touch the hot metal exterior, and then turned to look around quickly. No one was there; it seemed he had come around before any search parties could establish themselves. That was, at least, a small blessing.

He turned and cautiously half-dragged, half-lifted the girl out. She didn't respond, but he could already hear puzzled voices buzzing in the distance and caught a flash of light from the corner of his eye: no doubt, someone was coming to investigate the crash—and they couldn't be caught, not here.

Silently, he slung her over his shoulder, along with a black bag she carried, and tucked her vibroblade across his back, before beginning, with painful slowness, to make his way to the nearest building. Under a furious kick, the front doors ground open, letting him stumble in, the synthetic light blinding but the halls empty. Carth staggered down the hall and, mercifully, into an empty room tucked around a corner. He dropped the girl heavily onto a bed, before exhaustion rushed over him like a waterfall, and he leant back against the wall, sliding to the ground. The last thing he heard as he leaned his head back to sleep was the door grating shut behind him, and his last blurry thought was satisfaction that, for now, they were safe.

When he awoke, daylight knifing through semi-clear windows, he felt slightly better. Slapping a medpac into his leg to care for a few of the various cuts and bruises, he turned his attention to Ashi.

If he was better, however, she was even worse. She was in bad shape: cuts and traces of blood still spangled her face, and as he looked her over, a nasty wound he had obviously missed earlier caught his eye: a dark slash across her arm that a Sith must have given her. Pulling off her jacket, he took a closer look at it and swore. Whoever had dealt the injury had a poison blade—Sith's way of making sure they didn't go down alone.

Bastards.

Pressing a hand to her forehead, Carth cursed again, this time louder. It was scalding—no doubt the fever had set in overnight, while he'd been sleeping. He dug through his pockets hopefully, but there was nothing stronger than medpacs, and those obviously wouldn't cut it. Sith didn't frack around with their weapons; left unchecked, this was going to be fatal, and soon.

Reluctantly, he turned to her bag, opening one of the outer pockets before he could guilt himself out of it. His eyes widened immediately: far from antidotes, he found himself staring at a stash of grenades and what looked like deactivated mines. He glanced back up at the girl—no longer did she seem so harmless—and opened the next pocket, rummaging quickly through it. This time, he managed to find an antidote pack—in fact, he found many of them, but found himself unable to think anything of it after the explosives. He jabbed it into her arm near the wound, hoping it was soon enough. Finally, suddenly at a loss, he grabbed a chair and pulled it up beside the bed.

She moaned, mumbling something in her sleep, and rolled over, curling on her side. Carth found himself examining her. She was pretty, he supposed, but in an odd way. Her eyebrows were high and arched, giving her an almost sarcastic demeanor, and her something about the set of her jaw looked stubborn.

Her most noticeable feature by far, however, was her hair. Messy and disheveled, it faded through colors; on top of her head it was an orangey color, but by the time it ended at her shoulders it had faded through to dark red. He wondered briefly if that was natural or not.

Even as he thought it, though, she suddenly cried out, making him jump. "Damn," she whispered furiously, "it's a trap…" Her hands curled into fists; she no longer looked cynical but desperate. "Don't! Wait!" She thrashed weakly, her hands rising a few inches and then falling back to her sides.

Carth looked around helplessly. There was nothing he could do, even though she looked like she was having one hell of a nightmare. "Damn it!" she hissed. "Fight!" He frowned—_what in space is she dreaming about?_—but just then her face smoothed, and she rolled over restlessly and went quiet. He hesitated, eyes lingering on her face, but she seemed all right now. Besides, with a temperature like that, delirium probably wasn't the worst thing happening to her right now.

He sighed and settled back in his chair, crossing his arms behind his head. He was loathe to leave her now, when she was in such bad shape. Resolving to go scout out the planet later, he gave her a final glance before closing his eyes. Nothing to do now but wait for Private—for _Ashi _Lucas to wake up.

* * *

…_A team of Jedi on a ship…not the Endar Spire, but somewhere far different. A girl with determined icy eyes and hair in short brown pigtails was fighting a Sith. Their lightsabers buzzed and crackled with energy as the Jedi forced his blade down, and then struck a stance as he counterattacked._

_She herself stood behind, her face still stunned in realization as she backed toward the wall, buying herself a little time with distance. The entire space battle she had been watching with a slight puzzlement now made sense. They were just a distraction, while the Jedi sprung an ambush._

_The dark Jedi was losing; she only had a few moments more. There were four of them, but then again, she was a better fighter, and stronger in the Force. It would be interesting, she thought wryly, as she prepared for the unmistakable fight that was about to start…

* * *

_

One, and then another of Ashi's eyes slowly dragged themselves open. The next moment, they snapped closed straight away, flinching away from searing sunlight. _Who puts a bed next to a window?_ she wondered foggily, lifting a hand protectively to her face. Then it occurred to her if she was on a bed, somewhere sunny—and yeah, she definitely was, she decided—then she wasn't in an escape pod, or on that goddamned ship.

Where in space was she, then?

More carefully this time, she opened her eyes again, and allowed herself an uncertain glance around. She was in a small apartment, lying on a cot. Her jacket was nearby, folded neatly on a chair; obviously, then, she hadn't put it there. A cut on her left arm had a makeshift bandage, and her head was aching painfully, blood throbbing far too loudly in her ears.

She tried to think why she might be here, fighting the initial thought, _what the hell happened last night? _The last thing she remembered was being on that Republic ship…

_Oh, space_. Unexpectedly, the entire events of the Endar Spire battle poured back into her mind like a Wroshyr tree falling on a tach. A gasp slipped from her lips, more of shock than anything else, as she remembered all the deaths, Trask's included.

"Oh—you're awake," said a vaguely familiar voice.

Ashi sat up, to see a man in a beaming orange jacket heading over. She looked curiously at him, sizing him up. He had somewhere between eight to ten years on her, probably, but wore them well. He certainly classified as good-looking, even if the jacket was a little on the blinding side. He had been carrying a blaster, which he slipped into a holster as he walked over. He seemed somewhat disheveled, with a five o' clock shadow and messy dark hair, but still handsome, and his brown eyes looked relieved.

Ashi fully expected the relief to disappear after a minute or so, the time it would probably take him to realize he liked her a lot better unconscious.

"Good to see you up, instead of thrashing around in your sleep," he said gently. "You must have been having one hell of a nightmare." Ashi grimaced vaguely, still looking dazed. "I'm Carth," he added, "from the Endar Spire. Do you remember?"

"Right, yeah. The one on the communicator," she mumbled, and then kicked herself inwardly. Now he could be sure she had brain damage.

He grinned, partly understanding and, she decided sullenly, partly at her expense. "Well, you've been slipping in and out of consciousness for a few days, so I imagine you're pretty confused," he allowed, taking a seat on a bed across from her.

She nodded slowly. Her head hurt like hell in two different places, and her face stung in several places, the uncomfortable sensation of half-healed cuts. Cautiously, she reached up to touch one of the painful spots on her head and then winced, gasping out loud as a burst of pain flooded through her head. Colorful stars exploded behind her eyes, and for a moment her stomach lurched sickeningly. She jerked her hand away, running it instead over her face; she could feel scabs and ridges that marked wounds only starting to heal. "Damn…" she croaked, "what happened?"

He sighed, running a hand through his already messy hair. "You remember the Endar Spire?"

"How could I forget?" she asked, grinning humorlessly. "That was my first real Republic battle; I hear it's hard to forget."

Carth nodded, comprehension clear on his face. "We were in the escape pod," he explained evenly, accurately assuming she wasn't ready to hear a graphic version, "and it crashed here on Taris. You were in pretty bad shape and unconscious, but I was all right, sp I managed to drag you away from the scene."

_Damn it_, Ashi thought wearily. "So I guess I owe you my life, huh?"

He shrugged, shaking his head. "Don't worry about it. I've never abandoned anyone on a mission, and I'm not going to start now."

She frowned; he was laying on the Republic heroism a little thick. _All in a day's work, ma'am_, she thought wryly, and swallowed a smirk as he kept talking. It probably wouldn't do to laugh while he was speaking, especially as he looked pretty serious. "…but anyway," she caught him finishing, "by the time the Sith arrived, we were long gone."

She listened patiently, until a single word caught her attention. "Wait, wait, wait," she interrupted, lifting her hands to stop him. "The Sith? Why in space are they here?" At that, Carth's smile dissolved into solemnity, and she braced herself. "Oh, no. This is the bad news, isn't it?"

He nodded grimly. "Taris is under Sith control. The planet is quarantined and under military rule. They've got auto-targeting lasers, too; any ship that tried to make a run for it would get blasted to dust before they can break the atmosphere. Bottom line: we're stuck here right now, and the Republic's not getting anyone down here to rescue us."

Discomfort flooded Ashi. She hated being cornered, and the Sith seemed to have done a pretty good job of that, trapping her on a godforsaken planet on the Rim, minus a ship and anyone remotely helpful. "Not so sure the Republic really wants to rescue me anyway," she muttered, and then stood, ignoring the puzzled look on her companion's face. "So, if your admirals have abandoned us, how do we get off this rock?"

"Well, we can't do that right away," he began.

"I assume you mean apart from the obvious reasons? Like, for instance, we don't actually have a ship?"

Carth shook off the sarcasm but frowned nonetheless. He could feel a headache coming on. "Yeah, well, besides that," he replied grudgingly.

Ashi shook her head in annoyance. "All right. I've been awake two minutes, and discovered we're trapped on a desolate planet on the Outer Rim, overrun with fracking Sith troopers, and we don't even have a ship. Brilliant, Republic. If there's a silver lining, now might be a nice time to tell me."

But he shook his head, and she sighed, not really having expected one anyway. "Fine. What's the plan to get off the planet, then?"

"Not yet," he corrected, and, upon seeing her frown, explained, "We have to find and rescue Bastila." He was also about to launch into an explanation of why, involving lots of superlatives, but Ashi interrupted.

"_Bastila?_ You're trying to _find_ the brat? No way!" she protested, crossing her arms. "I'm not helping with _that_. Besides, she's a Jedi," she added quickly, catching sight of the look on Carth's face. "She'll take care of herself."

"I'm not so sure," he replied ominously. "Her escape pod crashed in the Undercity; she won't be safe on her own. It's our duty to rescue her."

"Oh, it's our _duty_, why didn't you say so? Of course, if it's our_ duty_." She looked to see his reaction, but the sarcasm seemed wasted on him. "_No._ I am not playing treasure hunt for a Jedi brat. You can go look for your precious Bastila. I am going to go to the cantina," she declared, "and find myself some fun." She turned determinedly on her heel, heading for the door—her head only whirled slightly as she stood, and she was pleased to find she could walk straight—but she found herself grabbed by the shoulder before she was halfway across the dirty carpeting, and spun around to face the soldier.

"Are you kidding?" Carth demanded, even though neither of them thought she was. "You're Republic now, whether you like it or not. What will you do, anyway, wait around until the Sith find you? Do you have any idea what they do to prisoners of war?"

A chill slid down her spine as his words sunk in. Damn, you just couldn't stay neutral any more, could you? "You know what? Fine," she snapped, throwing up her hands in resignation. "We'll go find your precious little Jedi. And when you meet her, I get to say I told you so," she added vindictively, glancing up at him to show him exactly how serious she was.

Carth nodded; if not completely satisfied by her answer, he understood it was the best he was going to get. "Okay," he agreed evenly. "Come on, soldier, let's move out."

A moment ago, as he spoke, her back had been to him, as she tugged on her flight jacket. The moment the words left his mouth, however, she went stiff, shoulders tensing. In an instant she had turned to stare at him, her face murderous. "Don't," she hissed, jabbing a threatening finger into his chest, "call me_ soldier_."

Taking a deep breath through her teeth, she spun on her heel and began to storm out of the apartment. Carth watched in shocked curiosity, and she had planned to leave him that way—let him find his _own_ damn Jedi—until, halfway through the door, his half-amused question stopped her.

"How in _space_ did you end up working for the Republic?"

She froze mid-step, still not turning to face him. "Blackmail," she replied, her voice deceptively casual. The next second, however, she continued bitterly, " Surprised, Onasi? Did you think your buddies working in the law enforcement and recruitment offices don't stoop that low?"

He didn't find himself as offended as he expected to be. "Is this going to be a long, resentful story?"

At that, Ashi turned back to face him, smirking. "You bet. Second thoughts on hearing it?"

"Definitely not. Should be entertaining." He raised an eyebrow, daring her to continue.

She rolled her eyes. "I suppose you're above rumors among the privates," she began, and he raised his eyebrows. "Yep, that's right. All the other privates had _rumors_ about me. Anyway, look, I doubt you've heard them, so I'll start from the top." She crossed her arms, meeting his gaze, and declared, "I was a smuggler."

He was silent. After a moment, she cocked an eyebrow, scrutinizing his reaction. "Surprised?"

He frowned, but shook his head. "Not so much, if I think about it."

"I'll take that as a compliment," she said, with a brisk nod. "Now, I would be seriously offended, on the other hand, if you said you thought I was here voluntarily."

"So you're not. Explain."

Ashi grinned. No one had been interested in hearing about her—hearing _her_ talk about herself, that was—for a long time. "I was a smuggler out on the Rim," she explained. "I'm not picky; I took whatever people wanted and weren't allowed to get for one reason or another." She rolled her eyes at his expression, which was becoming steadily more and more disapproving. "Yeah, you call it illegal. But I call it work. I was a pro, too, you know. You guys didn't have a chance in hell of catching me fairly."

But the next moment, her eyes darkened, and he voice turned suddenly accusing. "So, you cheated," she declared. "I was doing a run with spice, nothing even that major, when I got tractor-beamed off one of the smuggling routes. Turns out, some newbie kid got caught and ratted us out to blow off jail." She snorted, obviously disgusted.

"No honor among thieves, I suppose," Carth observed dryly.

Ashi glared. "I'm not a _thief_. I'm a transporter of prohibited goods. It's _different._ But anyway, the rat squealed, and they caught me off one of the routes. I'm not even that illegal; I think they were hoping to reel in a slave ship or something. But so anyway, they must've figured they had a point to prove or something, so the come on board anyway." A distinctly frightening smile curled across her lips as she continued, "I think I took out seven of them before one managed to stun me and get a neural collar on me.

"I was pretty sure I was headed for jail, but you guys don't have enough new recruits for this fracking war you started." Carth stared, protests against everything she'd just said rising up inside him, but Ashi didn't give him time to voice them. "All of them were pretty impressed by the fight I put up, and Next thing I know I'm taken to the guy in charge and he's offering me jail time or a position on the fleet." She shrugged coolly. "Only one answer to the question, right? Seemed like an easy choice to me."

And despite his many qualms with her obvious bias, Carth couldn't help being reluctantly impressed. "That's pretty impressive," he admitted grudgingly.

"I'm an impressive person," she replied with amusement, grinning slightly at the unwilling compliment. She pursed her lips, running her eyes over him, and for a moment Carth felt nervous under her scrutiny. "So, what about you, Republic?" she wondered aloud. "Got a fascinating history? Any deep dark secrets, or what?"

At that, Carth looked surprised, which Ashi thought was fairly stupid of him: he really should have seen the question coming. _Payback's a schutta, huh, Republic?_ "You really want to hear about me?" he asked skeptically.

When she nodded resolutely—_I asked, didn't I_?—he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, trying to decide where to start. "Well, I was a pilot in the Mandalorian Wars before all this began. I don't know, back then I thought they were bad, but even that war was nothing like the slaughter these Sith animals can unleash. Not even the Mandalorians were that senseless."

Ashi held up her hands, a sign of peace, as Carth's voice grew angrier and angrier. "Whoa, flyboy. Calm down; I was just asking. What's the problem?"

He glared at her, and she was slightly stunned by the pain in his eyes. "What's the _problem_?" he echoed incredulously. "You want to know what the _problem_ is? My home planet was one of the first to fall under the Sith fleet. They bombed it into submission, and there wasn't a damn thing the Republic forces could do to stop them!" His voice had risen steadily during the outburst, and by the end he was nearly shouting, his voice viciously loud in the tiny apartment.

Ashi stared at him, eyes wide and mouth slightly open. "Oh. Damn," she murmured, a whisper to juxtapose his shout. "I'm so sorry, Carth; that must be really painful."

Realizing she sounded completely unhelpful, she added, "I… get where you're coming from, though. The Mandalorians trashed my planet. It sucks."

He shook his head angrily. "But you couldn't have stopped it! I mean… no." Eyes darkening, he turned his head away. "I'm just a soldier. I go where the fleet Admirals tell me. I follow orders and I do my duty. It just doesn't seem right that doing that means I failed them!" Sometime during his rant, he had begun to gesture wildly, and he hardly seemed to be talking to Ashi anymore. "I _didn't_!" he added ferociously, although it sounded quite a lot like he was trying to convince himself.

"Fail who? What are you talking about?" she demanded. She disliked being left out of the loop, and while she could see Carth was upset, it was making her annoyed to be talking to someone who kept yelling.

He turned to stare at her, fire in his eyes... and then gave a deep sigh, realizing abruptly that he was confusing her. "I'm sorry. I'm not making much sense, am I? I guess I'm not used to talking about my past very much…at all, actually."

Ashi shrugged calmly, holding up her hands in the universal gesture of peace. "No worries. I don't like the past that much either. It already happened, so there's no use worrying about it, right? What matters is the future. And, speaking of which," she added, with a sideways grin, "we better get going to look for your Jedi brat if we intend to have very long futures. Come on, let's go see where you crashed us." Smiling confidently, she turned and stepped out of the door.

Following her with a hand on his blaster, Carth realized that, despite himself, he was smiling too. _I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like this before_, he thought, and then shook off the thought quickly._ No. I've got to stay focused. Got to…_

And then he lost his train of thought quite suddenly, as a familiar drawled accent floated through the doorway. "Damn," he muttered, grabbing his blaster on his way out and hoping their adventure wasn't over before it began.

* * *

**Let me establish now that Taris is probably going to be painfully long, just like real life. That said, read & review please! XP**


	3. Impulse

**Another chapter (Jesus! 12000 words! I'm kind of shocking myself...) I warned you about Taris, though; so far it's three more chapters. But anyway. Updates are going to be unreliable b/c I've got finals, but I'll work on it. Think maybe once every 2 weeks... possibly more, probably not less. once again, thanks for reading!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except Ashi. Sometimes.

* * *

**

**Impulse: sudden, involuntary inclination prompting to action**

"All right, you alien scum, up against the wall! This is a raid!" snapped a man in the seemingly mandatory drawl all Sith had. He was flanked by two battle droids.

/Another patrol was here yesterday and found nothing. Why do you insist on bothering us?/ snapped an alien.

_Hmm. Not smart_, Ashi thought, and the Sith agreed. He fired off a couple sudden shots and the alien keeled to the ground, blood pooling around his corpse. "That's how we deal with smart-mouthed aliens," he snapped sharply. "Rest of you, up against the wall!" Then he noticed Ashi, who had been watching with mild interest up until the shooting, when her expression had become enraged.

"Hey, what's this?" he demanded. "Humans hiding out with aliens?"

"Wow, you must be an intelligence officer," remarked Ashi, trying and not quite succeeding at a straight face.

The man's face contorted with anger. "They're Republic fugitives!" he accused, drawing a sword. "Attack!"

Just as eagerly, Ashi charged forward, leaving Carth to take out the droids. She slashed at the man, leaning back to dodge his return attack, and parried his next stroke. He lunged, and she caught his sword with a twist her wrist, before knocking it away. "I'm not Republic goddamn_ anything_!" she snarled, running her blade through the unfortunate officer's chest. He collapsed to the ground, leaving a streak of scarlet across the floor.

"Touchy," smirked Carth from behind her.

"Not touchy," she corrected with a grin, "individualistic." Ignoring his mutter of 'ouch', she turned to the other alien, concern writing itself hurriedly across her face. /Are you all right?/ she asked slowly.

The alien nodded hesitantly after a moment, wide eyes gleaming in the florescent light. Slowly, his gaze moved to his friend on the floor. /Poor Ixgil/ he said sadly. /He should never have talked back to that Sith. Lucky that you were here to help us, human—thank you./

/No problem/ she said calmly, sliding her sword away. /I'm not especially into cold-blooded killers./

The alien fervently nodded his agreement. /I shall move the bodies, so no one will know what happened/ he promised, glancing at the Sith with revulsion. /Once again, thank you, human./

/No problem/ she replied, a faint grin crossing her face. He gave her a final glance, before turning away to his friend, and out of respect she hurried away. Carth followed, his boots clacking sharply against the worn metal floors.

"You speak Duros?" he demanded, hurrying to catch up with her.

"Actually, there's not a lot I don't speak," replied Ashi, a hint of pride coloring her voice. Her footsteps didn't slow, however; it occurred to him after a moment that she was eager to get away from the crime scene, which he decided was unexpectedly sensible. The front doors parted easily for them, late-afternoon light cutting a rectangle across the apartment building's shabby entrance hall. Ashi turned out the doors and onto the road, but then stopped sharply, making Carth stumble behind her: directly before her was the escape pod, right on the edge of the Upper City walkway.

Breaking the silence, she observed, "Cutting it a little close, there, aren't we, flyboy?" She walked over brightly and peered off the edge of the street, down into the lower and under cities that sprawled below. "Damn, another foot or two and we would have been off the edge."

"As I recall, you passed out before we even came close to landing," Carth replied tetchily. She huffed, tossing her hair over her shoulder—"Not all of us do that on a daily basis, Republic"—and ambled away, into the already-crowded streets of Upper Taris.

The two made their way—one sauntering lightly, the other striding with measured, even steps—to an elevator tucked alongside several military-looking buildings, above which a sign proclaimed 'Lower City'. Here, Ashi stopped, glancing to Carth for affirmation. "You said Bastila's in the Undercity, right?" When he nodded, she continued, "So, makes sense that we've got to go through the Lower City to get there." She walked up to the elevator, glancing around quickly for anyone trying to stop her.

"Hey! You there, civilian! This elevator is off limits!"

She backed away immediately at the Sith officer's voice, hands raised in the universal gesture of peace. "Okay, okay. My bad."

"That's right, move along," he snapped, brandishing his blaster rifle threateningly. Ashi glared, and mimed shooting him in the back as he turned away, before looking back to Carth with irritation clear on her face.

"We're going to need to find a better way to get in," she sighed, her mouth twisting ruefully. For a moment, she was quiet, but then her eyes moved to a point behind his shoulder. Immediately, her eyes brightened, sparking like electricity. Her lips split apart into an instant smile. "But the cantina's over there," she observed, nodding towards a brightly glowing neon sign, "so it's not a total loss."

There were several things Carth would have liked to say—_but it's risky and we don't want attention; why do we even want to go there; how is this going to help us find Bastila?—_but by the time he could think of one, she was already halfway across the street, and he had to hurry to catch up.

* * *

The cantina was thick with cigarra smoke and the smell of alcohol, and music from a live band floated lazily into the main room where they stood. It must have been the gambling room, because all she could see were a bunch of card sharks. Ashi sauntered into the main room and glanced around, trying to see anyone who might be helpful. It was a nasty atmosphere, if not very dangerous, and Ashi wasn't surprised when she felt Carth sidle up beside her defensively. It was kind of nice, but at the same time, having an overprotective soldier glaring over her shoulder probably wouldn't help her pick up information with any degree of subtlety.

"Relax, Republic, I'm fine. This is my kind of place," she assured him. He looked unconvinced, but followed her to a table, where she sat down and began to quietly scrutinize the people. Carth took a seat opposite her, still looking somewhat protective. Ashi bit back a sigh; she thought she had made it obvious enough that she could take care of herself.

Just then, however, a man caught her eye. He was vaguely good looking, but it was the atmosphere he projected that she picked up on: an air of general contempt and arrogance. "Sith at three o'clock," she muttered quietly to Carth.

The pilot looked over and immediately caught sight of the man. "Off duty, good. What…" He broke off, staring in shock as Ashi got up and began to make her way towards the man. However, drawing his gaze now was her walk: suddenly every step seemed lazy and elegant, and… _sultry_, even, he realized, watching her. Gone was the cocky swagger she seemed to carry herself with, although this walk had no less grace—and no less confidence. She paused at the bar, looking up inquiringly at the Sith.

"Hey," she said, with a distinctly feline grin. "This seat taken?"

"Oh—I didn't see you there," he said immediately. _Liar_, thought Ashi, watching his eyes move slowly over everything but her face. "It is now," he continued, a Sith drawl coloring his words, and Ashi slipped easily into the chair. "My name's Yun."

"Ashi," she replied with a grin, crossing her legs.

Yun smiled. "Barkeep!" he called, half-raising a hand. "A drink, please, for my lady friend." Quickly, he turned back to her, interest faintly outlined in his face. "So, I haven't seen you here around before—I think I would have noticed."

She rolled her eyes inwardly, giving a little shrug. "Oh, I'm new here."

Yun nodded distractedly. "Who's that with you, though? I don't think he likes me," he observed with an unapologetic grin, gesturing at Carth. The soldier stared back, looking as if he couldn't decide whether to be severely disapproving, or simply to gawk.

_Can't he take a little improv?_ "Oh, don't mind him," she said quickly. "He's just a friend."

Carth, meanwhile, watched from across the room, stunned. He had envisioned subtlety, certainly, but flirting with Sith? Wasn't that a little much? Finally he shook his head, turning away in disgust. _Of all the fracking people to get stuck on an escape pod with—of all the fracking people to_ survive_ the damn battle…! I _would_ get this one…_ he thought irritably.

"…So you're a Sith? Wow, that's impressive," she remarked, widening her eyes with the words. Yun was visibly flattered.

"Well. I suppose," he agreed in a drawl. "But it's very stressful, though."

Immediate sympathy spread over her face. "Yeah, I bet," she nodded, pursing her lips. "Must be really hard. I hear the Sith are way too uptight."

At that, he grinned, taking a long, slow sip of his drink. "Yeah, but we're just junior officers. We need to blow off steam. And speaking of which," he continued, with a subtle segway, "there's a party at my friend's place tomorrow night, in the northern apartments. You want to come? I'd really like to see you again," he added with a smirk.

"Sounds fun," she said, only half a lie. This _was_ going to be fun. "I'll be there. Hey, uh, but my friend looks like he's getting a little impatient." _One way to put it_, she thought, looking over at Carth. "I think I'd better go." She leaned over to peck him on the cheek, adding, "See you tomorrow," in his ear. His eyes were following her every step back to the table, and only when he glanced away did she relax, allowing satisfaction paint a smile across her face.

Unfortunately, Carth didn't seem quite so appreciative. "What the hell was that?" he demanded, leaning across the table.

Ashi grinned proudly. "That was getting us invited to a Sith party, that's what."

He gritted his teeth. "Oh, great, because that sounds really _useful_. Well, whenever you feel like being helpful… or are you going to go charm some other idiot into buying you a drink now?"

She smirked wickedly. "Depends. You offering?" she asked, raising her eyebrows playfully. He spluttered furiously for a few seconds, as she leaned back, crossing her arms with a coolly amused smile. Then, however, since she was still a little annoyed at his lack of gratitude, she added, "Besides, I don't see you doing anything to help, Republic."

His eyes narrowed, proof that she'd gone too far. "Oh, sorry. I'm not interested in picking up Sith in the name of 'getting information'." His tone and expression made it clear exactly what he thought of this, and Ashi rolled her eyes.

"Right," she replied scathingly. "Back off, Republic, it's not my fault you have no people skills."

Carth, who was finding Ashi more and more obnoxious by the moment, finally had had enough of being insulted. He snapped back, tone insinuating, "People skills? Ah, is that what you call it?"

"Yeah? And what do you call it, then?"

He glared pointedly at her. "Plenty of words for what you're being right now."

Ashi stood up, shoving her chair in. "Fine. I'm not going to pull the weight for you while you sit there and be useless if you're going to be a jerk. Stay here and sulk if you want. I'm going to go look for something dangerous to do."

Scowling, she turned away, her hair flying over her shoulder. For a moment, he stared after her furiously; his eyes moved slowly to the table, and then to his hands, before he stood abruptly, deciding to follow in case she meant it. When he caught up with her, however, he found out she had been deadly serious; she was chatting animatedly with a giant, slug-like creature, and seemed far too eager for it to be a good thing.

"…I could be a duelist?" he caught, hurrying closer.

/Yes, yes/ agreed the Hutt, in a voice like a person gargling heavy machinery. /Go, fight, make money. Dueling pays well, human, don't worry. Ten percent is yours./

"Twenty," she bargained immediately.

/Ha! Let's see you fight first, human./

"I think you'll find I'm worth it," Ashi replied, a grin materializing on her face. "But anyway, when can I start?"

/Tournament is happening now. You get to start today, girl, in an hour. But you need a name. Hmm… I know!" he exclaimed, with what could have been a smile and was probably a smirk at the thought of future profits. /How about the Mysterious Stranger?/

One eyebrow raised fractionally. "The Mysterious Stranger?" she echoed, trying on the words for size. "I like it."

The Hutt nodded in approval. /Good, good. Me too. It gives you no past, no history. People love that… makes them bet more. Makes me money…/ He seemed to lose his train of thought for a second at the thought of money, but snapped back after a moment. /All right, Stranger: tomorrow morning, ten o'clock. Back here then, yes?/

"I'll be there," replied Ashi with a confident grin, before turning to walk away. Carth let her move away from the Hutt—he disliked the creatures in general, and had no desire to object to its own scheme in front of it—but grabbed her arm to spin her around the moment she was out of sight.

"Dueling?" he echoed with disbelief. "I thought you were joking. Can't you find something non-lethal for fun?"

"Lethal is the best kind of fun. And this isn't, anyway," replied Ashi tartly. "It's totally safe. Anyway, wouldn't think you'd care," she added, sneaking a glance at him from the corner of her eye. "The galaxy, minus one slut."

He opened his mouth, and found himself, to his humiliation, stumbling for a response. "But… I don't… well, no, I don't not, it's just… I mean…"

By this time, Ashi had stopped, helpless amusement scrawled across her face. She laughed, breaking the silence before it had time to settle, when his voice trailed off. "Stop sweating, Republic. You could try sorry." Face expectant, she tilted her head, waiting, and he sighed reluctantly, looking appropriately shamefaced.

"I'm… sorry," he said heavily. "I guess that was a little uncalled for." He ignored her scoff of '_a little'_, and added adamantly, "But still, dueling is dangerous! You could get hurt, even if you don't accidentally die."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Dying," she scoffed. "_Dying_ happens to other people."

* * *

It was the next morning that she found herself in the antechamber to the dueling ring, edgy and eager to prove that statement. Her armor was on already, and felt strange to her; she usually didn't wear any simply for the sake of subtlety. Across her lap lay her vibroblade, sparking in the florescent lights above her. She leaned back nonchalantly, tapping her fingers against the bench with barely concealed anticipation.

"Stranger! It's starting!"

She was on her feet at 'stranger', and by the time the person got the second part out, she was heading for the door. In one hand was her sword, and in the other…

Oh. Right. It had been on one small condition that Carth had agreed to let her duel—as if he could have stopped her, but still. That condition was keeping her identity secret, and in her hand was the key to all that.

She pressed the object to her face, the metal cool against her skin. It fitted perfectly, giving her far better vision than she would have expected, and giving everyone else nothing at all to see. Grinning behind the mask, she stepped out into the ring.

The crowd roared its approval as they saw her, and she was unsurprised. She did cut an intimidating figure, dressed in all black, the mask glinting silver and rendering her faceless.

"Welcome to the Taris National Dueling Championships!" announced a loudspeaker voice. "Ladies and gentlemen, draw your eyes to the center ring! We have a very special presentation in store for you! First up, we have a new entry…

"Finally, what you've all been waiting for: the Taris dueling finals! In this corner, he's fast, he's dangerous, he's borderline psychotic…it's Twitch!" The crowd screamed euphorically as the Rodian pulled off his customary mini-seizure.

_Borderline?_ Ashi wondered incredulously, raising her eyebrows.

"And on the far side, a relative newcomer from the shadows of unknown worlds"—Ashi snorted; he was playing that one up a bit—"to the Taris dueling scene, with no past, no history, It's the Mysterious Stranger!"

If possible, the screams were even louder, as Ashi glanced around, giving the crowd a single wave. Then, she focused her attention on Twitch. None of the duelists, except maybe Marl, had really had any talent, but if the announcer told any of the truth, this Rodian was about crazy enough to be dangerous.

However, before she had time to worry, the announcer screamed, "Fight!"

Twitch fired up his blasters immediately, shots beginning to fly towards Ashi before she even had her vibroblade out. Dodging the red bolts of energy, she raced across to him, and he pulled out a sword in time to meet her head-on, with a spectacular clang of metal. Their battle was short but intense, the crowd clinging desperately to their every movement—after all, when was the last time anyone had put up a good fight against their champion? Finally, however, Twitch's blade slashed across her hand. Ashi cried out, and, for just a moment, the Rodian let up his guard. It was far too long, though; Ashi quickly lunged in, taking advantage. Twitch's eyes bulged in horror, growing even bigger than their usual notable size, and a moment later his body collapsed to the ground.

The crowd screamed its approval, as did the announcer. "Twitch is down! Twitch is down! The Mysterious Stranger has won!" A man in a suit came racing out into the dueling ring, beaming. He reached for Ashi's hand, noticed the blood with a grimace of disgust, and quickly took the other one instead, raising it above her head and shaking it enthusiastically—_"Taris, your champion!"—_before turning to her.

"So, stranger," he wondered in exaggerated curiosity, "who is it behind the mask? You couldn't be persuaded to take it off?"

He smiled, but Ashi shook her head. "Some things," she replied, unable to help herself, in a voice distorted through the metal, "are better off staying mysterious."

Up in the stands, Carth pressed a hand against his face, hanging his head. She attracted attention like a metal to a magnet, even with a mask on. To himself, he resolved never to let her duel again.

It was late when Ashi finally escaped the cantina amidst flying rumors—she was apparently either hideously scarred, wanted for intergalactic crimes, or the reincarnation of the Sith Lord Revan; Ashi would only accept credit for the second—and she and Carth headed back to the apartment. The next day, she was still interested in looking around the city some more, so they set out. They didn't find much in the residential section where they were apparently staying, but after about an hour, they ran into a group of men.

Ashi wasn't sure whether to laugh or be disgusted. It was only a couple hours past noon, and yet these people, dressed in nobles' robes, too, were already swaying slightly, like reeds in a breeze. One appeared to be only half conscious and was leaning on one of the others for support. She shook her head. "Taris's finest, on your right," she observed quietly, and Carth looked over. His face contorted in immediate revulsion; irrational though it was, Ashi found herself annoyed—_oh, yes, because you're so high and mighty, Republic—_but it might just have been her unhelpful desire to pick a fight.

Just as she was about to walk past, however, one man gawked at her. Turning to his friends, he stated, in a slurred tone punctuated by hiccups, "Look at that! What's this planet coming to, huh? Slummies, just walking around the Upper City."

"Look at that," said Ashi, turning to Carth and putting on the same incredulous voice as the drunk. "What's this planet coming to, huh? Drunks, just walking around the Upper City?"

The men were not amused, and one fixed Ashi with an unsteady glare. "Shouldn't you go back to the Lower City where you belong, slummie?" he asked, and Ashi bristled.

Carth looked mildly disgusted as his eyes moved across the scene. "Well, this is rich," he observed.

"Yeah, slummie!" chimed in another man eagerly. "Why don't you just go back to your filthy Lower City where you belong? These streets are for upper class! You better get out of the way, slummie, if you know what's good for you," he added. Perhaps it was meant to be ominous, although a hiccup halfway through his sentence ruined the effect slightly.

Ashi's hand rested on the hilt of her vibroblade, the closest she seemed to get to subtle. "You better take that back, drunks, if you know what's good for you. Most people are smart enough not to pick a fight with me, even when they're smashed."

The drunks seemed not to pay attention to the insult, more distracted by the blade she carried that they had just noticed. "Hey, hey, calm down, slummie. No need to get angry," said one. He held up his hands in peace but staggered dizzily to the side, crashing into one of his friends. Momentarily, a smirk twitched across the corners of Ashi's lips.

"Good idea. And if you're planning to keep alive long enough to get slaughtered by your hangovers tomorrow, I think you'll leave me alone now, right?" They all nodded nervously, and she walked past, expression still irritated.

Carth followed, looking disapproving. _What a surprise_, Ashi thought tiredly. "What are you thinking?" he demanded. "Death threats to nobles in the middle of a city street? Have you gone insane?"

Ashi shrugged. "No more than usual. Death threats are great, if you can pull them off like I can."

But he still looked reluctant, so she added, "It worked, right, Republic? So no big deal. And excuse me if _I_ don't want to sit by and get called filth by_ them_."

Carth, despite his pre-established reluctance, was beginning to see her point. Given a chance, he might even have relented, had Ashi not suddenly started off in a new direction, completely diverted. In a nearby alleyway, she could make out three figures, one backed into a corner and the other two crowding menacingly around it. As she sidled closer, the shadowy outlines resolved themselves into three men, the cornered one middle-aged and looking extremely anxious. She paused at the mouth of the alley, just close enough to hear their conversation, as Carth hurried nervously after her.

"You've missed your last payment, old man," one of the thugs snarled, his hand resting unashamedly on his blaster. The cornered man's eyes followed it instinctively, wide with fear.

/Yeah, and Davik doesn't like you missing payments/ snapped the other, an Aqualish with a wickedly sharp vibroblade across his back. Ashi rolled her eyes—the thugs weren't actually half as scary as they seemed to think they were—but the old man might have disagreed. He looked halfway to a heart attack.

"Please! I just need a little more time!" he exclaimed, his voice reedy and tremulous next to the growls of his attackers. "I don't have that much right now! How can I give you credits I don't have?"

Carth looked torn, his hand wavering above his blaster as his face grew pained, the do-gooder soldier in him kicking in. "I know we need to keep a low profile," he muttered from the corner of his mouth, "but we're not just going to let them kill this man, are we?"

Ashi smiled, shaking her head. "Course not, Republic. I'm going to pull off a couple more death threats, is what's going to happen."

/You've had enough chances/ snarled the Aqualish. /You're coming with us./

"Yeah," grinned the human, "Davik's going to want to make an example of you."

Instantly, the old man's expression went from anxious to utterly terrified. "Help!" he called frantically, no longer making any attempt to be quiet. "Someone help! They're going to kill me!"

"And, there's my cue," Ashi murmured to Carth, striding confidently into the alley. He followed a couple yards behind, waiting uncertainly to see what she planned to do. "Hell-o, everyone," she drawled, glancing around leisurely. "What might be happening here, I wonder?"

/Hey!/ snapped one thug. /Looks like we got ourselves a witness./

"Davik doesn't like witnesses," the other added threateningly—apparently, a hand on his gun was no longer enough of a hint.

"Yeah, Davik doesn't like a lot of things, huh?" remarked Ashi conversationally, as she reached for her vibroblade. "You know what I don't like? Thugs like you, and your attitudes in particular," she snapped, the relaxed tone vanishing as her voice became instantly more hostile. "I was actually thinking I might have to teach you a lesson. Except, seeing as that probably involves killing you, it'd be kind of wasted, wouldn't it?"

The thugs glanced at each other, and then simultaneously drew their weapons. "You just made trouble for yourself with the wrong people, sweetheart," the man hissed, cocking his gun.

"You just made trouble with the wrong person, actually. Namely, me. Sucks for you," Ashi said, before lunging forward and drawing her vibroblade in one smooth motion. The human, not half as quick on the draw as he should have been, collapsed to the ground, headless; furious, the other thug reared up behind Ashi. She parried his attack and spun, her vibroblade flashing in the murky half-light. He struck at her, but she forced his blade down and danced back, glancing for holes in his defense.

Before she had a chance to find one, however, he went suddenly stiff, keeling over almost on top of her. Taking it in stride, she stepped aside to let him fall, and her eyes found Carth, his blaster still raised. "I had them, you know," she told him, and he rolled his eyes skeptically; ignoring the expression, she turned to the cowering man.

"Don't hurt me!" he shrieked.

She sighed through her nose, sliding her blade back into its sheath with a hiss of metal. "Wouldn't that defeat the purpose of saving your life? I'm not going to kill you. Though you might want to make yourself elsewhere before someone comes to investigate."

Slowly, the man began to nod, his motions speeding as he caught on. "Thank you. Thank you so much," he mumbled hurriedly, edging by her before speeding from the alley. Carth was about to say something—maybe congratulate them on a good deed, or add something about how it could be satisfying to help people too, couldn't it?—but found himself lost for word as, the next moment, Ashi bent and began to go through the pockets of the corpses. "What are you doing?" he demanded, even as it became glaringly obvious when she pulled out a purse bulging with credits.

"I'm looting the corpses. What the hell does it look like I'm doing?" she replied evenly, transferring the credits to her bag.

"That's disgusting!" Carth snapped, lowering his voice halfway through when he remembered all the Sith soldiers on patrol just a few yards away.

Ashi shrugged. "They don't mind," she replied, gesturing to the bodies. Calmly, she stood, brushing past him as she turned away. "Anyway, complain all you want. If you do, though, you don't get to use this blaster." She stopped at the corner to the street, afternoon light falling haphazardly across her hair and face, to examine the weapon she had pulled off the man. "Which would be kind of a shame. It's a really nice make—lightweight, but I figure…"

She broke off, leveling it experimentally, and pulled the trigger. Carth stiffened in frantic disbelief as a bolt went whizzing past him, but it struck a crumbling wall at the alley's end, leaving nothing but a small scorch mark. "Good firepower," she continued calmly. "Echani, maybe."

Suddenly, with a flick of her wrist, she tossed it over to him. He reacted on instinct, and snatched it out of midair, wrapping his hand around the handle. With a grin, Ashi continued, "You can keep that. Or you can give it back to the corpse. Your choice." She turned, vanishing around the corner and into the streets.

Carth paused, and then grudgingly pocketed the blaster, before hurrying after her. With confidence that seemed ridiculously assured, for being in a completely new city, she found her way quickly to the shopping district, shortly before informing him that he could not go to the party in Republic uniform—to quote her, on a remark that had stung, 'did he actually have a death wish, or was he really just that sentimental about the jacket?' She had layered her voice so thickly with skepticism that a deaf Rodian could have picked up on it, clearly insinuating it was _not_ something worth being attached to. Grudgingly, he replied that he would wear whatever he wanted, and she could pick her own clothes if it mattered so much.

Very soon, he would regret saying that.

Ashi looked incredibly pleased with herself as they made their way back through the darkening city—presumably a bad sign—and he found out why when they got back. She ducked into the fresher to change, reemerging after a few minutes. "What do you think?" she asked, doing an experimental spin.

Carth stared, openmouthed. The dress might as well have been spray-painted on, and for a moment, he was stuck trying to remember how to speak. In the absence of a reply, she said lightly, "All right, I'll assume you choking on your own tongue means, 'it's good'."

Carth snapped back to reality, his own sarcasm returning instantly. "Oh, very nice," he replied acerbically. "Yun won't even have to use his imagination."

She shot him an exasperated glare. "Well, at least it's not _neon orange_. Look, if you're going to be a killjoy, flyboy, don't come."

He frowned, but, unable to argue, settled for shaking his head fervently. "And let you go into a Sith party, alone, dressed like that? No way, sister. You're stuck with me."

"The I-can-take-care-of-myself vibe isn't working, huh?" Ashi asked, rolling her eyes. "Fine, you can come. But it's a party, Republic. Lighten up!" She shook her head in slight amusement and headed for the door, beckoning him to follow with a jerk of her head.

"Come on, let's go. Wouldn't want to keep my date waiting," she added, earning a scowl from Carth as he skulked out of the apartment.

* * *

When they arrived, the party was in full swing. Yun opened the door with a glass of ale in his hand, grinning at her in a way that suggested he was already fairly drunk. "Wow," he said, staring unashamedly at her. "You look amazing." Somehow, he missed Carth's filthy look.

Ashi nodded, grinning at him. "Thanks. You don't look so bad yourself," she replied, lies flowing as easily as the drinks must be.

He took her hand, beckoning them in. As his back was turned, Ashi mouthed, '_smashed'_. Carth snickered, covering it with a cough.

"Do you want to dance?" Yun asked, smiling in a way he apparently thought was winning. Ashi nodded with convincing enthusiasm, and they moved onto the dance floor. She stepped tactfully around Yun's shoes as they nearly missed her toes; he didn't seem light on his feet to begin with, and the Tarisian ale on his breath wasn't helping as much as he seemed to have hoped.

Carth stared after them for a moment, gritting his teeth, before taking a deep breath and putting on a grin. Ashi was right: it was a party, and if they wanted to find out anything they would have to be friendly.

He ended up talking to some junior officer called Sarna, who was Yun's sister, or maybe cousin—just because he was listening, didn't mean he was listening closely. She was equally ready to gripe about her job, but Carth listened with as much sympathy as he could muster, soaking up information about the Sith on Taris. This was the good news; the bad was that someone kept filling up the drinks, and Tarisian ale, vicious as it might be—more like drinking lighter fluid than anything else—was damn hard to stop drinking.

It was a few hours into the party when it began to die, as people alternately left or passed out. Carth slumped onto a couch, his head buzzing slightly, he felt a sudden presence beside him. The dress told him it was Ashi before she even spoke, and—nothing but the ale, he maintained fiercely—he found his gaze slow and very reluctant to shift to her face.

Fortunately, she didn't seem to notice. Biting her lip, she glanced around hurriedly, and then, seeming satisfied, dropped down next to him with a sigh. "Damn, flyboy. You were right."

He rolled his eyes, grinning. "I know," he said, his voice as clear as it had to be. "What was this about in particular?"

"Yun," she informed him, rolling her eyes with disgust. "He's useless for information, and…" She paused to consider the phrasing, before continuing, "Well, _subtlety's_ obviously not a defining trait of his."

Instinct triumphed over liquor, and Carth looked furiously protective at the words, which reminded her of the cantina. "I think he has the same high opinion of me as you," she added, and caught his look of slight guilt with a note of satisfaction.

Then, out of the corner of her eye, she glimpsed the Sith officer again, supporting himself on a wall and looking around the room curiously. "Damn," she muttered, as his eyes lit onto her. She didn't like her options at the moment, but then, glancing at Carth, a sudden, hopeful—and probably very, very bad—idea occurred to her. Turning to the pilot, she whispered urgently, "Hey, help me out, okay?"

"What?" Carth was about to ask, but as Yun called, "Ashi?" in a decidedly slurred voice, she shifted closer to Carth and pressed her lips against his, hoping it might help Yun lose interest.

Maybe she'd hoped he wouldn't respond, or that it would be with resignation rather than eagerness if he did. Neither was the case. As soon as Carth got over the initial shock, but before he could remember what he was doing, he _reacted_, bringing a hand up to cup her face. His head was buzzing—not from the drink any more—as he leant into the kiss, not thinking straight and certainly not feeling guilty for it. But here, _here_ came the part he wouldn't forget: she could have shoved him off, disgusted with the alcohol on his breath and his actions, and she _didn't_. Her hands grasped at the collar of his jacket, keeping him from pulling away, and he wrapped an arm around her waist, returning the favor without any regrets whatsoever. It could have been for Yun, but surely she didn't have to lean in closer, kiss him harder. That sure as hell, Carth decided, didn't feel like acting.

Ashi, meanwhile, was experiencing the same surprise as Carth. To her surprise, she found herself enjoying it a lot more than she should have. He tasted like the ale that had been floating around, and she could see he'd been drinking, but so much the better right now—she doubted it would have looked half as good if he'd been totally sober, and she wasn't complaining about any of this at the moment.

Thankfully, before she could consider that too deeply, a hand yanked her shoulder, and she found herself face to face with a very angry-looking Sith. "What the hell?" demanded Yun thickly, his hand digging into her shoulder. "Oh, sure, just a friend." He gestured angrily at a Carth who, rather unhelpfully, seemed stunned into uselessness.

Ashi was slightly nervous; not scared of Yun, but of what he might do out of drunken anger. However, she wasn't a smuggler for nothing, and lying under stress happened to be one of her areas of expertise. "Yun?" she gasped, feigning shock. "It's… I mean, it's not what it looks like…"

"Save it, you schutta," he mumbled furiously, shoving her forcefully back into the sofa. He stormed off, and they heard the front door hiss open and closed.

Ashi sighed in relief, slumping back against the couch, as Carth seemed to come to with a sudden jerk. "Thanks, flyboy. I owe you one," she nodded, before glancing around and muttering more quietly, "The party's dying, I'm going to go look for something to get us into the Lower City." She got quickly to her feet, making her way into one of the other rooms.

For one, final, blissful moment, Carth was dumbstruck, and then guilt began to rush into him. _It shouldn't feel like cheating if my wife's dead_, he thought to himself, but quickly shook the thoughts off and heaved himself dizzily to his feet. It was... it was helping a comrade. That was all. _Besides_, he added wryly, _as far as I know, stubborn and reckless isn't my type. _

Even as he thought it, though, the ale seemed to have rendered him more candid than usual, because it occurred to him how, fifteen or twenty years ago, he might have described Morgana that way.

Meanwhile, Ashi dug through a bag, looking for uniforms. _That was a damn good kiss_, she thought unexpectedly, but then mentally slapped herself. Besides the fact Carth was almost ten years older, he was also Republic. That affiliation might as well be one and the same with 'off-limits'. He did get credit for helping her out, though—_not_, she reminded herself quickly, _that you're ever going to do anything like that again…_

But the next second, all thoughts of that flew out of her mind as she seized on two pairs of silver armor. Instantly she grabbed the uniforms, holding it quickly to her chest to double-check the size. It looked about right, and the other seemed bigger—Carth would just have to make do. "Come on, flyboy," she called quietly. "Let's go."

As they headed back out of the building and onto the street, Ashi sighed. "Hey, uh… sorry about… uh…" To her horror, she found herself blushing. It was ridiculous—she had nothing to be embarrassed about. "I wanted to get Yun off my back," she explained quickly, "and that seemed like a good way to do it. Then."

He shook his head, grinning. "Sure—it seemed like a good idea at the time." But then he paused, and added, "Really, s'okay." He could see her logic, and it was only helping a fellow soldier._ Comrade_, he corrected himself. _Not soldier_. "But warn me next time you pull something like that, okay?" He smiled, and then threw in, "I was right about Yun, though."

She rolled her eyes, shoving him lightly—it sent him reeling for a moment, but he recovered quickly. "Yeah, fine. You were right. And I'm never going to tell you that again, for the record, if you keep gloating."

A grin, however, contradicted her tone. "And we're headed to the Lower City tomorrow?" she continued.

"One step closer to Bastila," he nodded, his military instinct kicking in.

She snorted. "That's you, Republic, saving the galaxy one useless Jedi at a time."

He glanced over, raising an eyebrow. "What is it you have against Bastila, anyway?"

At that, Ashi turned to stare at him, incredulity in every inch of her face. "You're kidding, right?" she wondered, but Carth shook his head. "Well, it's not that she's a bad person. She's actually incredibly easy to get along with. Just don't be in the same room as her," Ashi said with a small laugh.

"You've met her?" he asked in surprise.

Ashi nodded, but then frowned suddenly, her brow wrinkling. "Yeah… no, wait." For a moment she hesitated, before murmuring, "This sounds weird: I know I have, but I can't remember when, or how." She paused, combing her mind, but a vague memory she had of obnoxious, stodgy Bastila seemed to flutter out of reach.

"Probably because you hit your head in the crash," suggested Carth. "Never mind." They walked back in companionable silence, but the mysterious memory bothered Ashi all the way back.

At the apartment, they collapsed into bed. Carth was asleep before his head hit the pillow, which Ashi found increasingly irritating as sleep eluded her; she quickly decided to blame at least part of her insomnia on his snoring. In the end, she lay awake for a long time, running over the day again and again, always getting stuck, to her annoyance, at the kiss. Finally, she fell into a restless sleep, where she dreamed of running, being chased by someone she couldn't see.

* * *

The smell of caffa and the daylight sprawling through the grimy windows woke her up that morning; rolling out of bed, she sat up and stretched lazily. Today they would be heading down to the Lower City, and she would need her energy. She showered quickly and dressed, before stumbling into the kitchen, grabbing a mug of caffa and slumping in a chair.

Carth was already awake, of course. Typical Republic officer: slightly hung over, even, and yet he'd probably never even heard of sleeping in. "Morning, flyboy," she mumbled.

He glanced over her, a slow smile working its way across his face. "Not a morning person?" he asked innocently—not that he wasn't grinning through a headache, but he felt the need to laugh about something, especially after the previous night.

She muttered something under her breath that Carth probably didn't want to hear anyway, and then added something about caffeine. He ignored her until she had almost finished the entire mug, when she brushed her hair out of her face and shook her head to clear it. "Better?" he asked with a grin.

"Shut up, Republic," she snapped without much conviction; anyway, it was counterbalanced by her grin. "I just needed caffeine. I'm fine now."

"Good," he said, nodding briskly, "because we're heading down into the Lower City today. It's pretty nasty down there."

She nodded in a distracted sort of way. "But it's only early morning; we have all day…" She looked like she had something else to say, and after a moment she wondered aloud, "Since I doubt the sane part of the planet is awake yet, is now a good time for more questions?"

Truth to be told, Carth didn't want to fight with Ashi, not with the consequences it seemed to have. He shrugged evenly. "Sure," he replied. "I'm all ears, beautiful."

If Ashi had been half-asleep before, she was completely awake now. "I like the sound of that," she said with a playful smile, draining her mug.

Carth raised his eyebrows. "What? That I'm all ears, or the beautiful part?"

"The beautiful part." Ashi smirked. "Keep calling me that."

"Hmm." He pretended to consider it. "What are you going to call me in return?"

"Are you kidding? I have Republic and flyboy. You don't need a third name."

Carth shrugged. "I was under the impression at least one of those was an insult, coming from you," he pointed out.

Ashi laughed out loud. "So now I'm an anarchist, too?" To his relief, she didn't seem offended, although she replied, "True though it may be, that's enough. I can always call you an idiot too."

Carth suspected she might not necessarily be joking, and backtracked quickly. "No need, really. Why don't you stick with the insults you have." He smiled, but it faded quickly. "Fun as this all is, though, I bet you haven't forgotten those questions. Are they really necessary?"

Ashi frowned suspiciously. "Is this going to involve more yelling?"

"No, don't worry. Go ahead and interrogate me."

She rolled her eyes. "I don't think this counts as an interrogation unless I have a blaster pointed at your head. I can do that, though, if you want."

He raised his eyebrows, not sure it was completely a joke. "No thanks—I don't think I trust you with a gun pointed at my head. You're a little too impulsive for that."

"Impulsiveness is a key quality for smugglers," Ashi replied proudly. "You need to be able to adlib a little when you get in trouble."

"Adlibbing. Right, like when you kissed me at the party," Carth smirked.

Ashi stopped, her mouth half-open. Whatever she had expected him to say, that wasn't it. Carth suddenly bringing it up threw her off. And, she reminded herself, if things threw her off, it usually meant she shouldn't think about them. "This all started because you can't deal with some fracking questions," she grumbled, crossing her arms.

He grinned, wondering with slight puzzlement why him bringing that up would bother her. "Sorry, I'm just joking. You are full of questions, though; it's kind of refreshing."

The words were out before he considered them, and almost too honest for his taste. It was refreshing: everyone else either was intimidated by him, or had known him long enough to know not to ask him. Neither seemed to make any kind of difference to Ashi: she couldn't care less about military rank, and certainly wasn't interested in tact when it restricted her curiosity.

Then, as he remembered his questions for her, he became abruptly serious. "Can I ask you something first though?" She nodded reluctantly—_I already _told_ you my life story_—and settled back in her chair. "I've been going through the Battle on the Endar Spire over and over again in my head, since we crashed," Carth said slowly, "and some things just don't add up for me. Maybe you could tell me what happened, from your perspective."

She shrugged. "Well, Trask woke me up, freaking out about Sith attacks and telling me to 'get to the bridge, defend the Jedi!' I didn't want to, but he was about as persistent as you are on that one," she grinned, "so we headed for the bridge. Figures, of course, she wasn't there, and Trask decides on plan B, which happens to be my plan A: get the hell out of there. We were on the way to the escape pods but…"

She suddenly broke off, surprising them both with the need for a deep, wavering breath. "This Dark Jedi showed up and Trask pulled a hero and sacrificed himself for me. I guess he killed him, then he came after me, so I ran away, and then you told me to meet you at the escape pods, so I did." Ashi took a deep breath, and then shrugged and sighed. "That's it, I think. I didn't really get what was happening at the time, you know?"

Carth nodded slowly. "Neither did I, to tell the truth. I was only on board as an adviser, really." He paused, and when he resumed speaking, his voice was ice cold. "But we lost the ship and a lot of good people, and for what? We were all hoping too much that the Jedi would save us, although I guess Bastila just didn't have time. After all, the battle was forced on us pretty suddenly. I'm just as surprised any of us survived."

Again he stopped, and, frowning, looked curiously at Ashi. It was a harsh, mistrustful look and Ashi glared back at him for it.

"Come to think of it, he said slowly, "it's more than a little surprising that you happen to be here, isn't it?"

"Excuse me?" she demanded, realizing his irrational suspicion was finally coming around to bite her. "You'd rather I wasn't?"

He shook his head quickly. "No, that's not what I mean. You've already been helpful and I'm glad to have you here."

She nodded in relief, but it was short-lived as he added, "It just seems a little… convenient, is all, that a last-minute crew addition is one of the survivors."

Ashi almost couldn't believe what she was hearing. How could he possibly accuse her of that—how could he possibly be that tactless? "Oh, I see. Because they added me late, I obviously must be a Sith spy. Impeccable logic, Republic," she snapped, "especially since I already explained why I'm not a goddamn solider! I guess you're going to tell me next that I had something to do with the crash!" she continued, her voice rising. "You think I did that? You think just because you think I'm a criminal, I must be a Sith too?"

To her fury, he wouldn't even look at her, glancing instead at the door to make sure no one heard her yelling. "No! Well… maybe, I don't know!" he replied. "All I'm saying is that it seemed odd someone Bastila's party specifically requested survived."

Ashi stopped in surprise. "_I_ don't know anything about that!"

"The Jedi requested numerous things when they came on board—hell, they practically took over the ship as far as I could tell." He sighed, trying to calm himself and Ashi down. "Look, I'm probably wrong and this is probably nothing, I know. But I just learned a long time ago not to take things at face value. I _hate_ surprises."

She glared at him, slamming down her mug of caffa and standing up. They made an odd scene: the suspicious Republic soldier and the furious smuggler, staring each other down across the kitchen table. "Well, you better get the hell over it, flyboy, because I'm going to be full of them. You obviously have trust issues, but there's no reason to take them out on me!"

"It has nothing to do with you personally," Carth replied in a monotone. "I just don't trust easily, and I have reasons, which are my own, so no, I'm not going to discuss them. Can we keep our mind on more important things?"

Ashi's eyebrows flew up, and she gritted her teeth. "I consider this important! I don't expect you to share all your fracking secrets with me, but I do care whether or not you think I'm a goddamned Sith spy! I was under the impression you weren't a complete son of a schutta," she continued, heading for the kitchen door, "so great job proving me wrong, Republic."

She was in the main room now, snatching up her bag and vibroblade as she went. "Oh," she added over her shoulder, snatching up her new silver armor, "and believe me, when I say that right now, that's an insult."

She would have liked to leave it there—quitting while she was ahead, and all—but Carth came running out of the kitchen, looking furious. "Where the hell are you going?"

"Why the hell should I tell you?" she exclaimed, throwing up her hands. "The Lower City, since you asked so nicely, and if I don't come back you can assume that I'm either dead or in jail. You can rest easy either way."

Ashi turned and walked out the door, not bothering to look back. If he had any brains at all inside that military head of his, he wouldn't follow.

Clad in the Sith uniform, she made it easily past the elevator guard. "Heading to the Lower City?" he asked, and she nodded brusquely. "Be careful down there," he warned. "There's a bunch of punks from the swoop gangs that are looking for trouble."

"Thanks for the warning," said Ashi, mimicking a Sith voice, and he stood aside, letting her pass. The elevator ride was a couple minutes long and stuffy, and by the time it was over she was getting incredibly sick of the stifling uniform. She finally gave up and pulled off the helmet, shaking out her hair as she stuffed it in her bag.

A moment later, a grating screech of gears told her she had arrived. She stepped out, eyeing her surroundings leisurely. It looked like all permacrete, and there was rubble and graffiti everywhere. As she watched, a small, rodent-like creature emerged from under a pile of garbage and scampered away into the refuse. Ashi shook her head; this place really was a dump.

Turning the corner, however, she found her first real proof of life—she wasn't counting the rat—and immediately ducked back under cover when the first thing to catch her eye was a lot of weaponry, glinting in the feeble florescent light. "Vulkars are the strongest!" crowed one figure. "You Beks are nothing but weak fools, still worshipping a crippled old man as your leader."

/And you Vulkars are nothing but backstabbing traitors/ snapped a Rodian, grabbing his blaster. /We'll show you who's strongest!/

The Vulkar—whatever that meant—lunged, and stabbed the Bek in the stomach with his stun baton. The unfortunate Rodian cried out and the collapsed to the ground. The smug-looking Vulkar then helped his friend double-team a Bek, and they cut him down quickly. While they fought, the third Vulkar was dueling with a human Bek. He overpowered him, and then ran his blade through the man's chest. It seemed, she thought dryly, that Vulkars were the strongest. The Bek fell to the ground, blood staining the street in a nasty red mark. With a jolt, Ashi realized there were many such marks, one directly under her feet.

It was then, just as she swallowed her growing disgust, the apparent lead Vulkar caught sight of her. "Sith aren't welcome here!" he growled, brandishing a stun baton.

Ashi's eyes narrowed dangerously, anger lighting in them like matches. "I'm not a fracking _Sith_," she declared. "Want to come over here and say that, street scum?"

"Wearing a Sith uniform, but saying you're no Sith? Right," snapped a Vulkar. "How stupid do you think we are?"

This time, to their surprise, Ashi grinned. "About as stupid as you look. Stupider if you think you can take me." She watched in pleasure as the Vulkars swelled with outrage. They obviously weren't used to people having fun at their expense in the middle of their threats.

"That's it!" roared the Vulkar, firing up his stun baton. "You asked for this one, sithspawn!" He rushed her, and she sidestepped, before spinning and kicking him in the jaw. He reeled, stunned, and she followed up with a flurry of slashes from her vibroblade, sending him collapsing to the permacrete.

She turned, and grinned cockily at the other two.

"Who's next?" she challenged, beckoning them forward and shifting into an offensive stance. They both snarled and one lunged for her, the other hanging back with a blaster. He was strong, and landed a solid hit on her left arm as she dodged blaster bolts. She hissed in pain, but then ducked suddenly.

The Vulkar was taken by surprise, as the energy bolts she'd just avoided hit him in the chest. He staggered and fell to the ground, and Ashi darted to the blasting one, who looked horrified but pulled out a stun baton. She quickly knocked it out of his hand, however—it was obvious he wasn't a melee fighter—and kicked it several feet away, before swinging him against the graffiti-coated wall, holding her blade to his throat.

"One, you little son of a schutta," she snapped, "I'm not Sith. Two, maybe you punks ought to think twice, or at all, before messing with me. Spread the word. Got it?"

He nodded, and she smiled. "Good," she said, jerking her blade away. "Might want to run, in case I change my mind about letting you go."

He didn't need to hear it twice, and was running almost before she'd finished. Satisfied, she left the bodies, and continued on her way. The cantina, she decided, was the best place to be, and set about finding it.

She did, too, quickly. It was much like the Upper City one, albeit seedier, like the sudden, barely noticeable shift from twilight to darkness. The air was thick with smoke and the smell of spice rather than cigarras, but there were the same sleazy type of people, the same smell of alcohol and raucous laughter from those who'd had too much of it. Ashi inhaled and grinned: this felt like home.

She hung out with the card sharks for a while, winning only somewhat more than she lost but learning a couple new faces; a few minutes later, she carefully managed to deter a man who introduced himself as Holden and seemed torn over whether to drool over her or the Twi'leki dancers. Then, rounding a corner, she almost ran into a smart-mouthed blue Twi'lek and a Wookiee fending off punks in a gang. Ashi was tempted to step in at first, but in less than five seconds, the girl had proven she was more than capable herself. As Ashi watched the thugs make themselves scarce, the Twi'lek turned and caught sight of her.

"Hi!" she chirped brightly, her face reversing instantly into a smile. "I don't know your face, and I know about everyone here, so I guess you must be new, right? Guess that makes us your official welcoming committee! I'm Mission, and the Wookiee's Big Z, my best friend."

Ashi felt herself grinning; the girl's attitude was infectious. "Good to meet you, Mission. I'm Ashi Lucas."

"I've never heard of you," said Mission bluntly. "You really are new, aren't you?"

She smiled. "Heard of the Mysterious Stranger?"

Mission's mouth dropped open. "You won the dueling competition? Oh, that's so cool! But… your face is normal and everything." She paused a moment, scrutinizing Ashi for hideous scars, and then continued, "So, yeah, welcome to Lower City. It's not that nice or anything," she added as she glanced around, "but I do know pretty much everything there is to know about it."

"It's cool for me," said Ashi comfortably. "It feels like home. I was a smuggler, I've been in places a lot worse than this."

"A smuggler?" Mission gasped, her eyes widening. "No way! That's so awesome! What do you mean, was? What did you smuggle? Where'd you go? Did you have, like, a super-fast ship? Are you wanted, for being a smuggler? Omigod, was that why you wore the mask for dueling? _Nice_. That was smart. But how come you're here?" Then sympathy spread over her face. "Are you caught in the quarantine?"

Ashi beckoned them over to a table, happy despite herself to have met someone who didn't seem to think smuggling was a waste of time or a scourge on humanity. She found herself describing her entire past as a smuggler to the girl, right up to getting signed on with the Republic. Mission, in return, ended up telling Ashi everything she knew about the Lower City. This, rather impressively, took so long that in the end Ashi offered to buy them lunch. They ate and chatted, while Zaalbar, the Wookiee, sat by watching. He seemed out of his comfort zone, and though Ashi glanced at him a couple times, he didn't say a word.

Finally, Ashi noticed, with a jolt, that Carth was entering the cantina. She held out a hand, and Mission stopped mid-sentence, eyes questioning. "Hey, Mission," said Ashi deliberately, "I need you to do me a favor."

Mission, who was more perceptive than people were willing to give her credit for, had already followed Ashi's sideways glance at Carth. "Whoa, Mr. Colorblind in the orange jacket?"

Ashi snorted with laughter. Zaalbar, who was colorblind himself, didn't get it.

Mission's eyes were still on Carth. "Who's that, your boyfriend?"

Ashi almost laughed again, but instead shook her head fervently, and Mission misinterpreted. "An ex? He stalking you or something? 'Cause that's creepy."

This time Ashi did laugh as she replied, "Yeah, he is following me, but that's not the point. He's not my ex. He's kind of a friend, who's being a jerk right now."

"Ah, you want me to help you avoid him?"

Ashi nodded approvingly, grinning. "I like you, kid; you catch on fast."

Immediately, Mission bristled. "Hey! I'm no kid! Then she caught Ashi's laughter and joined in, cracking a smile. "Yeah, all right. What should I do?"

She shrugged. "Just throw him off my trail a little, yeah? I kind of told him that if I didn't come back, then I was either dead or arrested," she added with a smirk, "so he probably suspects the worst."

Mission cracked up, especially when she glanced over again and took in the worried expression on the man's face. "I can tell him you got arrested, if you like."

Ashi grinned, but shook her head reluctantly. "Knowing him, he'd go to the jail and sulk until he finally figured out I wasn't there. Just sort of point him in the wrong direction. Be as unhelpful as you like."

Mission beamed. "Unhelpful… I can do that."

Ashi smiled gratefully and gave the Twi'lek a quick hug. "I have a feeling I'll see you again soon, kid. Later." She hurried across the room, turning halfway and mouthing 'have fun'. Mission flipped her the thumbs-up. Moments later, Carth began to head her way, and Mission prepared to launch into her full hyperactive greeting.

Ashi, deciding this was a show worth seeing, sat down to watch out of sight, but the moment she turned back to watch, she noticed sniffling from behind her. Curious, she turned to see a young Twi'lek dancer with flamboyant orange and peach coloring, sitting at a table on her own. A drink sat by her, but she hadn't touched it. Ashi immediately stood up again, slipping instead into the seat next to her.

"Hi, I'm Ashi," she said, grinning. "What's wrong?"

The dancer looked up in surprise, wiping immediately at her eyes. "What? Oh, um, Lyn. And it's nothing."

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "You're crying; it's something."

"Nothing you can _help_ me with," Lyn persisted, looking surprised someone was even trying to talk to her. Sighing when Ashi refused to simply leave, she admitted, "I'm supposed to be having a dance audition, but my partner just quit on me. And this is really important, a major producer's here, and this might be my one shot at the big time."

"Why would your partner quit?" asked Ashi, frowning.

Lyn snorted. "She can't take a little honesty. I just told her that she couldn't get anything right, and she was dancing with all the grace of a bantha. She didn't have freak out at me and leave," she added resentfully, scowling.

"Yeah, that may not have been the best moment for blunt honesty," said Ashi, earning a glare from the dancer. She couldn't help a feeling of slight surprise; the girl didn't seem that awful. Maybe she had been humbled by now. "You want me to help you?" she asked suddenly, and Lyn frowned.

"Help me?" she echoed, looking confused. "What do you mean?"

"With your audition, genius. What did you think?"

The Twi'lek frowned, biting her lip as she looked at Ashi. "Look, no offense, but this is a big deal. I don't really want to try it with a random person who offered out of the blue."

Ashi grinned persuasively, eyes lighting up. "Actually, I'm a _very_ good dancer. I think I could help you out, if you like."

Lyn stared intently at her for a moment, and then slowly, her mouth turned up in a smile. "Okay," she said, "but we have to hurry. My audition is in fifteen minutes, and you _cannot_ dance in that," she declared, looking at Ashi's beloved jacket with distaste.

Ashi felt a small hint of regret, and began to object, but Lyn cut her off. "Come on!" she instructed, and, seizing Ashi's wrist, dragged her towards one of the backstage rooms.

Fifteen minutes later, by which time Ashi was feeling fairly confident—if hoping everyone she knew had left—Lyn led her over to the producer. "Mr. Bib," she said tentatively, when the green Twi'lek glanced suspiciously down at her, "I'm Lyn. I have my partner, and I'm ready to dance."

Bib frowned. /A human?/ he asked in his native tongue. /Lyn, are you sure?/

Lyn smiled brilliantly. "Oh, I'm sure."

Bib turned to Ashi, not quite managing to clear his face of skepticism. "Human, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to take off the cloak," he said, in heavily accented Basic. "You can't dance in that."

/I know/ sighed Ashi, taking pleasure in watching him jump as she spoke fluently in Twi'leki. /But no holding me responsible for all the drool on your floors./ She slipped the heavy fabric off and over her head, letting it pile on the ground before kicking it out of the way. The Twi'lek stared in obvious surprise. The dancer's outfit, thanks to Ashi's loud and deliberate protests, covered slightly more than most of the Twi'leks', but was still certainly less than a flight jacket and leggings. Lyn, obviously proud of herself, grinned smugly, and Ashi rolled her eyes as she glanced around: already, several of the men in the room were staring, identical, widening smiles on all their faces.

Ashi shook her head, and turned to the two Twi'leks. "Whenever you're ready, Lyn."

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**A cliffhanger... idk. Sort of. Reviews are great, so if you feel like writing one (it's not actually difficult. like, at all...) But anyway, here's a quote from the next chapter, just for added suspense:**

**Carth: **_**No, I don't think she's drunk. I think she's insane.**_


	4. Slum

**Hey guys!**

**Sorry this is a little late, but it is long, so I get some credit for that... I hope. This is the Hidden Beks, the Undercity, and the sewers (including the rancor)--I'm getting it all over with. Anyway, when we left off it was with a vague sort of cliffhanger, so I won't keep you in suspense any longer...**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR**

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**Slum: a thickly populated, run-down, squalid part of a city, inhabited by poor people**

Carth sat at the bar, feeling distinctly overworked. One hand was kneading his head, which was still aching from his encounter with a chatterbox Twi'lek flanked by a Wookiee. An odd pair, and it was odder still when the girl had managed to talk for almost a minute straight without a single pause: swearing she knew him from somewhere or other, and trying to figure out what holo he had been in that she had seen. He had tried to ask her about Ashi, but with no luck.

He sighed, took a sip of the drink and didn't taste it, and admitted it: he was worried about her. He didn't doubt her ability to get in trouble on accident, let alone if she was in a bad mood and looking for it. She hadn't come back, either, which led him to think she must be dead, arrested, or still angry with him.

They all sounded pretty bad.

He took another gulp from his bottle, and leaned against the bar, frowning angrily. He shouldn't be this concerned. It was pointless; after all, it wasn't like she couldn't take care of herself. It also wasn't like he should care whether she was there or not. She was annoying, and reckless, and impulsive, and…

_Damn._ That didn't sound reassuring at all.

Just as he sat down, he heard a number of voices and whistles coming from somewhere to his right. "What's going on over there?" he asked a man next to him, half-turning without really mustering any interest.

"I don't know," the man replied, glancing back over his shoulder with far more enthusiasm, "but it looks worth seeing. You know," he added suddenly, "I heard there's auditions for the dancers on or something. This's probably one of them." He stood up, new eagerness in his steps, and began to saunter over.

Carth glanced over to where the noise was coming from. The dancers were in the next room over, but there was an obvious crowd, and they all looked like they were enjoying the show. Carth frowned—despite several good times during his earlier days in the fleet, it was his impulse now to shun that kind of thing—but then decided unexpectedly, _what the hell._ Anything, to take his mind off of Ashi and how worried he was, when by all rights he should be thanking space.

He headed over wearily to stand at the back of the crowd, only able to partly see past the many people in front of him. It was an audition, he supposed, but to his vague surprise, only one of the dancers was Twi'lek. The other was human, but a quick scan around told him he'd be damned if she wasn't getting more attention. In fact, she was maybe even better than the other; her dancing was shamelessly seductive, and enough to provoke glares from the regular Twi'leki dancers. All the men in the crowd were grinning and many were whistling, too, including the one from the bar.

Normally, Carth might be whistling too, but at that moment he was having trouble even moving his lips. His gaze was fixed steadily on the human girl: he couldn't make out her face, but he could definitely see her slender body and the sway of her hips as she danced alongside the Twi'lek, and _damn_, it was enough. Her pale skin seemed to glow in the hazy cantina light, giving her an almost mirage-like appearance, and next to her the Twi'leks' coloring seemed suddenly flamboyant and gaudy. Although, he thought dazedly, but for her skin tone—pale rather than red—Carth wouldn't have hesitated to bet that she was from Zeltron.

"Check out the_ girl_," remarked the man, nudging him and grinning widely. It was obvious he was referring to the human. "Even better than the regular dancers they have here. Can't believe they haven't hired her yet."

Carth nodded slowly. "I know what you mean," he replied, eyes still glued to her. _Frack._

The man continued, unperturbed. "I had no idea she could dance like _that_. I mean, she's fracking hot anyway, but…" He trailed off, shaking his head again. "But I'd be careful," he warned suddenly. "She's fiery. I was talking to her earlier: _frack_, she's got a temper."

"Yeah?" Carth nodded, only half paying attention—anyway, half his attention for this man seemed to be one half too many.

"Better believe it," replied Holden with a grimace, not really caring. "I mean, it's hot and all—bet that makes things pretty fun, huh?—but _damn. _I tried talking to her, you know, all charming and everything, and she nearly bites my head off. And then I find out she's a fracking _dancer_? Usually they're pretty into that kind of thing." His clear irritation sparked in the words, spurred on by the Tarisian ale clenched in his hand.

Suddenly, however, a grin curled across his face, as he took a sideways swig from the bottle. "You think she's drunk?" he asked unexpectedly, glancing to Carth.

At that, the soldier half-frowned; slowly but surely, he was paying less and less notice to everything but the human girl. "What? Why?"

The man smirked widely. "Ever seen anyone dance like that and be sober?" he posed, with a leer that made it clear he considered 'drunk' exactly his type. The next second, however, he groaned loudly as the dance came to an end. The two dancers straightened up, each flashing the obviously disappointed crowd a teasing smile, and Carth felt all the color drain from his face as he caught sight of the human dancer's face.

There was no way she was that goddamn stupid. It couldn't possibly be her… except that it _was._

"No," croaked Carth. "I don't think she's drunk. I think she's insane."

He stared, half-stepping forward towards Ashi. Holdan stared. "You know her?" he demanded incredulously. "Frack—you're a lucky son-of-a-schutta." Carth paid him no attention; most of his head was still stuck on what he'd just seen.

_I wouldn't have been thinking that if I'd known it was _Ashi, he thought, failing to convince even himself. In an effort to halt the thought in its tracks, he craned his neck to catch sight of her again. She was beaming, looking far too damn happy, and talking animatedly with her partner and a pleased-looking green Twi'lek who had been watching them.

_Well, you're fracking hired_, he thought irritably. Whatever he'd been thinking, it wasn't his fault; it was _her_ fault for being the thoughts' catalyst. What was she even doing, dancing in a cantina in a fracking scumhole? For a moment, he even debated going over to her and demanding an answer to that question, but then realized the potential embarrassment of this, and the satisfaction she would get from realizing he had been shamelessly watching her performance.

And, besides, that was if she wasn't still angry. Instead, he gave her a final pointless scowl over the sea of heads, and went to sit sullenly at a table near the door, ready to find her when she came back.

It was a few minutes later that Ashi reappeared, wearing her regular clothes and a Cheshire cat grin. She strolled out of the room, still with the other dancer and talking effervescently. He had hoped for subtlety, but, hawk-like, her eyes darted suddenly to him, and he felt the undeniable contact before he could yank his gaze to the ground. Turning, she murmured something to the Twi'lek, before sauntering over and sitting down next to him. A wicked smile painted her lips

_It's your fault_, thought Carth with no conviction.

"Enjoy the show?" she asked, and even though he had predicted the question, he still flushed bright red. For a few seconds, he stumbled for words, before settling on the obvious and taking the offensive.

"What in space were you doing?" he demanded angrily. He willed his face to look irritated. He had been watching out for her, and she was stubbornly refusing to be kept out of trouble.

Inwardly, she gave a sigh—seeing him in the crowd, she'd hoped… she didn't know what. _Something_. Immediately, she looked hurt as only practiced liars can. "Dancing," she replied innocently. "I thought you saw." _I know you saw_, said a slight twitch at the corner of her mouth.

Still, he stared at her. "_Why_? Of all the things you could be doing to look for Bastila, you decided to go fill in as a cantina dancer instead?"

She paused, tilting her head to the side, before frowning at him. "Yes. Did you really want an answer to that question?" When he glared at her, she rolled her eyes, waving a dismissive hand at him. "Oh, lighten up. Besides, I was thinking I'd join them," she said, fixing him with a look that dared him to argue.

To her surprise, he matched her pace for pace. "Go, then," he replied flatly, with a jerk of his head. "Bring some diversity to the cantinas."

At that, she laughed aloud. "Frack, no. I'm not wasting raw talent like this in a cantina."

"Waiting for someone special to waste it on?" he wondered, with a rakish grin that took years off his face—the fact that the smile also made him suddenly very good-looking didn't escape Ashi's notice.

"Yeah, can't you tell I'm desperate to be tied down?" she replied, rolling her eyes, and he couldn't help a small smile. He had asked for that.

"Well, anyway, I'm sure the crowd will be sad to see you go," he offered, although there was an edge to his voice that she didn't miss. He might have been watching the show, but, the fracking hypocrite, he still seemed to feel the need to go parental on her. Ashi sensed a fairly unwelcome pattern reemerging.

"You better not be getting all protective again," she cautioned, crossing her arms. "Start a bar fight next time, if you're so pissed off at them. I'd be flattered."

Immediately he shook his head. "There's not going to _be_ a next time," he stated firmly, leaving no space for argument in the words.

"Whatever," Ashi muttered, shrugging it off dismissively. "Try everything once, and all that." _You take that very seriously, don't you?_ he thought, but didn't say it aloud; her expression had already shifted from mischief to vague worry and cut him off. "You're not mad, right?" she asked carefully, scrutinizing his face for any lingering trace of irritation.

Despite himself, Carth felt a smile flittering across his lips, and shook his head. "No," he reassured her calmly, and then added with a grin, "although you don't get to go to the cantina on your own anymore."

"Probably had it coming," she agreed amiably, leaning back with far more ease than anyone should be able to muster in a place like this.

"What about me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "Am I forgiven?"

She tilted her head, considering; he marveled absently at how quickly she could switch moods. "Well, you're not forgiven for calling me a spy…" she drawled, a half-grin not concealing the obvious exasperation there.

Against his better instincts, he frowned in protest. "I didn't call you that!"

"That's right, you just implied it," she snapped. Then, "Wait, no." She lowered her gaze to the table, fingers playing absently along its rim. "I am sorry I got so mad. But…" She hesitated, and there was a pleading look in her eyes when she lifted her head again. "I need you to trust me, all right? I can trust you, if you trust me."

Carth stared into her face, impossibly hopeful, for a long moment. She looked so open, so caring. He _wanted_ to trust her, almost, and he did want to be able to be trusted. But he had learned a long time ago that traitors came in all kinds of packages.

He shook his head. "I can't," he replied gruffly. Before him, Ashi's face fell like a house of cards—_it must take years of practice_, he observed, _to look that upset so quickly_—but he continued mercilessly, "And if you're smart, you won't trust anyone either—not me, and definitely not yourself."

"Ah," Ashi said knowingly, leaning forward onto one hand and eyeing him playfully. "You don't trust yourself, is that it?" A smirk played across her lips, but somehow didn't reach her still-angry eyes.

He sighed, shaking his head tiredly. "Look, this isn't the time for this," he proclaimed. "How about we worry about something important right now?"

Her eyebrows drew together. "I think _this_ is important."

"All right, all right!" Carth groaned, holding up his hands in surrender. "You must be the most damned persistent woman I've ever met. We'll talk about it, but _later_, okay?" She rolled her eyes, but nodded reluctantly.

"Fine," she agreed, making no attempt to hide her distaste. Turning away to face Lyn the next second, she muttered /Arrogant nerf-herder/ darkly in Twi'leki. The dancer burst out laughing, especially after a glance at a very nervous-looking Carth. They were both finding his non-knowledge of Twi'leki very funny.

/How do you know him, though?/ she asked curiously, looking again between the pilot and the smuggler. They certainly seemed like an unlikely pair. In fact, Lyn had already begun to form her own theories on exactly why a soldier was helplessly following her new friend around cantinas, and it had amused her to no end, particularly as she watched the two arguing.

Ashi shrugged, unwilling to verify any of Lyn's suspicions. /He's a friend/ she explained, and then added, upon further consideration, /sometimes./

The Twi'lek raised her eyebrows suggestively, not bothering to hide her surprise or her skepticism. /Only a friend? I don't think he'd mind being more./

Ashi's mouth dropped open as she stared at Lyn, stunned. /Uh, you have to be kidding. Republic/—_damn_, she thought, as soon as the nickname was out, but no matter; she doubted Lyn was likely to turn them over to the Sith—/over there and I don't exactly click. Haven't you seen how different we are?/ She paused, and then added for emphasis /As in, like, polar opposite different?/

They both turned and looked at Carth simultaneously, who looked utterly lost as he tried to decipher their conversation. He recoiled nervously as both girls briefly scrutinized him and then resumed talking.

Lyn gave a delicate shrug of her bare shoulders. /Opposites attract, I've heard/ she offered calmly. She had seen him well enough; to be fair, being a Twi'lek, she was naturally more perceptive than humans, but Ashi's pilot had still caught her eye. He didn't look quite like he fit in with the rest of the Lower City, and he hadn't been giving her the slightest attention—his eyes had been fixed on firmly on the smuggler. Lyn was surprised, and slightly doubtful, that Ashi hadn't noticed at all. /You really didn't notice how he looked at you?/ she asked.

Ashi grimaced. /It's usually more like glaring/ she admitted, and Lyn heard the honesty in her words. Still, she shook her head emphatically, headtails twitching in aggravation.

/When you were dancing, though./ When Ashi raised her eyebrows doubtfully, the Twi'lek sighed. /You humans are so stubborn./

At that, the shadow of a smile crossed Ashi's face. /So I've been told/ she affirmed lightly. Then reverting back to Basic—mostly to surprise Carth—she sighed, "I guess we'd better go, Lyn. Good luck with the dancing and all."

Lyn smiled at Ashi gratefully, waving goodbye as they started away. "Remember what I said about opposites," she added loudly, with a mischievous smirk that Ashi was clearly meant to catch.

She rolled her eyes, tugging Carth by an arm to the exit. "What was that all about?" he asked with plain curiosity, as the door ground open in front of them. "More secrets?"

"Lyn," Ashi said firmly, "is looking for something where it doesn't exist." She walked briskly out of the cantina, and into the graffiti-ridden street, leaving Carth to follow and wonder what in space she had meant.

* * *

Ashi led him to the entrance to the Hidden Bek base, having been already told by Mission where it was. A guard interrupted them, but with her usual charisma, Ashi managed to calm her down enough to let them in. Albeit suspiciously, the woman escorted them inside after hearing a word-perfect description of Mission Vao, and accepting that Ashi had won the girl's worthy approval.

The base was lit by the same florescent lights of the street, but they were brighter, maintained with obvious pride. The same went for the rest of the base: crates were stacked throughout it, but neatly in piles; though graffiti still festooned the walls, it advertised only one gang. The base were lively, too, with the sound of dozens of people talking, arguing, conspiring, and generally living, however, and that lit the rooms more than any lighting could. Ashi could fit in easily, something about her stride making her instantly a part of the crowd, but Carth found himself pegged with several suspicious glances as he followed—perhaps something to do with the armed guard next to him. It wasn't unusual to be careful with newcomers; it was to not have shot someone shady already.

Making their way to a mid-sized room scattered with paper and machinery, they were quickly introduced to Gadon Thek and his overzealous bodyguard. Ashi, to her merit and Carth's appreciation, immediately asked Gadon if he had heard anything about escape pods crashing in the Undercity.

"Ah," he replied as she asked, a shrewd smile on his face. "Interested in that, are you?"

"They could be spies, Gadon!" accused the bodyguard, although she didn't spare Ashi or Carth a glance as she spoke. "They could be working for the Vulkars, or the Sith!"

Both Ashi and Carth looked largely offended at her allegation. "I'm no Vulkar," said Ashi immediately. "And I don't plan on being one, either. They're a bunch of filthy punks." Gadon found himself unable to doubt her, so sure and insulted was her tone; when she added, "Beat some up in the street this morning, though," he found himself grinning along with her.

Carth's face, however, was filled with something far from humor. Eyes flashing dangerously, he declared icily, "And we are not Sith." His voice, soft and dangerous, carried an unmistakable edge. "You can be sure of that."

"Honestly, Zaedra!" sighed Gadon, looking annoyed and sounding like he had already had this argument. "If the Sith thought we knew anything useful, they'd have a battalion of troops kicking down our doors. These people aren't Sith, and I can't seem to believe that you might be Vulkars, either," he continued, with a half-smile to Ashi. "Although," he observed, stroking his chin mostly for effect, "you look like you're not locals, either. And interested in the escape pods…"

He stopped, and then shrewd comprehension spread across his face. "You wouldn't be looking for a crewmate, would you?" he wondered.

"And if we are? Although," Ashi amended quickly, "ex-crewmate; I'm not Republic any more." She smiled cockily, despite Carth's glare and his obvious annoyance at her being so free with their identities.

The Bek leader shrugged. "I have no problems with it, if that's what you mean. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, as they say, and next to the Vulkars, the Sith are my enemies right now."

She shot Carth a _see?_ look, wondering, "You've got problems with the Sith?"

"A foreign army invades our planet, declares martial law, and cuts off all travel to and from the planet?" His voice rose slightly as he listed, losing just a hint of its nonchalance. "Damn right, I have a problem with that."

Ashi nodded. "Yeah, I _think_ I can see where that gets annoying." She paused, and then offered slowly, "So, uh, about those escape pods…"

Gadon laughed, a chuckle deep in his throat that Ashi immediately trusted. "Persistent, aren't you?" he observed, but didn't wait for an affirmation. "Very well. I do know a little bit about the escape pods, and I think I can pass on the knowledge. After all, it can't hurt us, but it could cause problems for the Vulkars, and," he said, with a conspiratorial grin, "that's okay in my book."

He settled into his chair, tilting his head back to look up at them. "The Black Vulkars got to those pods first, I'm afraid. A shame, too, as you'll never guess what they found—or, actually," he added, eyeing first Ashi and then Carth, "maybe you might. Would you be looking for a female Republic officer called Bastila?" he wondered coolly.

Carth gasped, and Ashi's eyes widened. It was a reaction she could have hidden, but, at ease with Gadon, she didn't bother. "Damn. Well, that complicates things," she muttered, glaring at Carth as if it were entirely his fault—which, to some extent and with some heavy justifications, it was. "What'll happen to her now?"

The gang leader sighed, rubbing a jaw sprinkled with faint gray stubble. "I'm afraid your friend has become a pawn in Brejik's plan to take over the Lower City," he said, and his voice was weary; this seemed to be a plan he had spent too long thwarting. "He hopes to win the support of other, smaller gangs, by putting her up as a prize for the swoop championship."

Ashi nodded; Mission, the walking encyclopedia of Taris, had filled her in on the basics of swoop racing. "So what can my friend and I do? We need to rescue Bastila; she kind of can't become a slave. Not that I care, but you know, it's one of those 'fate of the galaxy' things," she said lightly, the last few words accompanied by a crooked smile. Again, ludicrous as the words sounded, she spoke them with such assuredness that Gadon couldn't help but to believe them.

"Yes, you seem like a person who might be involved in that sort of thing," he observed, nodding calmly. He leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms behind his head in a relaxed manner. His expression contained the deep satisfaction of a person who has just found themselves in a win-win situation.

"I think," he proclaimed, "that we can help each other, Ashi."

She raised an eyebrow: _continue,_ said her face. "I'm listening."

"For the swoop race," he explained, "we've been developing a prototype accelerator. It was a very important piece of technology, practically guaranteed to give us a win. Unfortunately, the Black Vulkars had someone on the inside"—here, nobody missed Zaerdra's lips pressing together in fury—"and managed to steal it. We need to get it back if we want to have any hope of victory."

"So you need me to get it back for you," she clarified for him. "What'll you do for us if we come through?"

He rubbed two thick, worn hands together, a ready grin on his face. "I think you'll like this part. We'll let you race under the Bek banner, and if you win Bastila, she's yours. Sound good?"

"Depends on the catch," Ashi replied immediately. "What do I need to do to get your accelerator?"

The Hidden Bek leader gave her a quick, respectful glance. "You don't miss a trick, do you?" Ashi smiled proudly, evidently taking it as a compliment, but his still-serious expression dampened her enthusiasm slightly.

"That won't be easy," he replied. "You'll have to break into the Vulkar base to get it back. There's no way you can get in through the main door, so you have to sneak in. Luckily, there's an entrance in the sewers, and I know who can help you find it." At this, a spark lit in his eyes that could have been either eagerness—to Ashi—or a warning—to Carth. "Perhaps you've met her already? Her name is Mission Vao."

Ashi's face broke into a wide smile as Carth's fell. "Mission! Great, I know her, I met her today," she exclaimed, just as Carth moaned, "Isn't there _anyone_ else who can help?"

The bodyguard seemed to side with Carth, although she looked at no one but her leader. "Mission?" she echoed dubiously. "Gadon, she's just a kid."

Ashi smirked. "Don't tell Mission that."

"No, I'm sure," said Gadon decisively, with a single shake of his head. "Mission knows every inch of the sewers. If anyone can help you through them, it's her. You know her—I take it you can find her?" he asked, turning his attention back to Ashi.

She shrugged. "Kind of seemed like someone who might be anywhere. Do you know where she usually is?"

Gadon nodded calmly. "She and her Wookiee friend, Zaalbar, are probably exploring in the Undercity. You could look for them there, but you'll need help getting into there. Luckily, I have…"

He broke off to ruffle quickly over the contents of his desk, before seizing on a stack of official-looking documents. "Some papers that will get you down," he explained, brandishing them for Ashi's inspection. "All you need to do is trade those Sith uniforms"—he pointed coolly to her bag—"you've got there for them."

"But the papers will get me everywhere I need?" asked Ashi. Gadon assured her they would, so she quickly handed over the two uniforms. "Thanks, Gadon," she said with a smile, and then paused, her notorious curiosity piquing. "Um, one more question."

Gadon nodded encouragingly, and Ashi scrutinized him. His most interesting feature was by far his eyes: silver and hard, like steel, but more than just as a simile. There was definitely something distinctly metallic about them, and Ashi wondered about it, remembering that Gadon was, by all rights, blind.

"Are those ocular implants?" she asked, before she could change her mind, gesturing to his eyes.

She heard a groan from behind her, and saw, out of the corner of her eye, Carth shaking his head, a hand over his face. "Oh, _very_ tactful," he muttered, looked up to meet her gaze. "What, are you itching for a fight, or something?"

Zaerdra, too, seemed to swell with rage. "I should kill you where you stand!" she exclaimed, her head-tails writhing in anger. She had a knife and a blaster tucked in her belt, but, eyes darting to her, Ashi decided the woman could probably—and very easily—kill with bare hands for that comer. Her eyes widened as she took in, for the first time, how scary Zaerdra actually was.

"Please don't," she said quickly, raising her hands in peace. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude. I just wondered. Ocular implants are really cool. I knew this guy with them, he could see in the dark. It was pretty damn useful. Saved my ass once," she added with a faraway grin, looking vaguely reminiscent; it wasn't an expression Carth would have expected on her, and looked like one her face wasn't quite accustomed to. Then, unable to help herself, she added, "Can yours do any of that stuff?"

Gadon smiled. "Not only night vision—these can read heat signatures. I'm sure you would have found that pretty useful too." He looked pleased at her interest, rather than offended. "I'm not ashamed of what I am, Zaerdra," he added pointedly, and his bodyguard slunk back a couple steps, looking appropriately abashed.

"These help me deal with my loss of sight," he continued, now more to Ashi. "They allow me to see perhaps better than I did before. Slightly ironic, no? I see better when I'm blind." But, unexpectedly, there seemed to be no hint of bitterness in his voice. In fact, he seemed almost pleased by her curiosity for a moment, before his face grew serious again.

"Is that all, then?" he inquired, not sharply but with a businesslike edge. _Well_, Ashi supposed, _you don't stay in power in the Lower City by wasting time_. "It would be good if you could start planning to break into the Vulkar base and get back our accelerator."

She nodded—_of course_. "Yeah, that's all. Thanks, Gadon," she said with a smile. "I'll be back soon."

Zaerdra was still glaring at her. Turning so the desk and a particularly large stack of parts hid her from Gadon, she gave the bodyguard a meaningful glance over her shoulder. As the woman stared back, Ashi began to walk away, and very deliberately, by her side, gave the Twi'leki woman the finger.

Zaerdra, bit back a visible snarl, going purple with anger. Her fists seemed to be trembling slightly with the effort of not going for a weapon. Ashi, making her way briskly out of the office, pretended not to notice. Carth had—he shot her a sideways glance that clear was laden with irritation—but as she turned into the hall, she thought she heard a deep chuckle from behind her.

Huh—the Hidden Bek leader had a sense of humor. Obviously, not a bad ally at all.

* * *

As it turned out, however, she didn't plan to go explore the Undercity right away. Ashi instead headed for the apartment complex, ignoring Carth and the less-than-subtle severe looks he was throwing her. Instead, she searched the empty apartments, collecting anything and everything useful she could find. He couldn't complain, however, when their number of medpacs doubled, although he was slightly annoyed when she began to take grenades. Unfortunately for him, though, Ashi was not to be deterred, and took everything she found that could possibly be deemed helpful, along with several things Carth was sure could not.

"I," she snapped when he objected, "have no interest in being ripped apart by mutants in the Undercity, if it's all the same to you." Finding that he had no response to that, Carth grudgingly stopped protesting.

However, it became very clear after only a few apartments that Ashi couldn't escape her magnetism for trouble, any more than Carth, flapping his arms, could escape gravity. She had just sliced the lock on one door and let it hiss open when she came face-to-face with an angry-looking woman, wearing thick armor and carrying a large blaster. In a split second, it moved from by her side to in front of her, aimed directly at Ashi's head. She froze, an apologetic grin on her face.

"Hi, Ashi Lucas," she said, with an experimental wave. "I'd appreciate it if you could, uh, point your blaster away from my face. It's a little disconcerting." The woman gave a venomous scowl, not amused, but Carth saw Ashi's hand moving slowly to her vibroblade, even as she spoke. She was getting ready to fight.

"What are you doing here?" demanded the woman, blaster not wavering an inch. "Get out!"

Ashi frowned. "Okay, okay. Space, though, someone could use a little attitude adjustment." When the woman snarled, pointedly laying her finger tighter across the trigger, Ashi gave her an unexpected smile, snapping her fingers as if something had just occurred to her. "Hey… you wouldn't happen to be called Selven, would you?"

"Selven?" Carth repeated incredulously. "_Selven?_ As in the assassin?"

"The most dangerous on Taris," she growled, not lowering her blaster.

Ashi shrugged. "Meh. I've seen worse."

"That's it!" Selven snapped, cocking her gun. "Now you'll see how I earned that reputation!" She lunged towards Ashi, who spun to the side, drawing her vibroblade. The assassin beat away Ashi's swing with the barrel of her blaster, and then drew her own blade.

"Ooh, scary," muttered Ashi, and Selven gritted her teeth, forcing down Ashi's sword. Ashi swung it up and around, landing a hit on her shoulder; however, the assassin didn't even flinch, instead parrying Ashi's next flurry and ducking under blaster fire Carth sent her way. With an uncanny speed, she pulled a knife from a belt on her waist, slinging it in Carth's direction. He dodged, but barely, and the blade lodged itself in the wall behind him, quivering gently.

Ashi's eyes widened. "Good aim. How many people did you knock off with that move?" Selven seemed slightly annoyed by Ashi's nonchalance, and sent her a low swing Ashi couldn't block. The blade cleaved her side, under her ribs, and she hissed in pain.

"Damn, you don't fight fair, do you?" she spat, kicking Selven in the chest. The assassin reeled, and Ashi swiped at her, a sudden, cleaving blow that took off her non-sword arm. Selven looked stunned.

"You cut my arm off," she said disbelievingly, staring at the disembodied limb on the ground with horror. Ashi wasn't fazed.

"Mm, so it would appear," she replied, and then lunged forward. She stabbed Selven through the chest, just as Carth's fire hit her, piercing her armor.

"Your aim's not bad either," Ashi observed, before reliving Selven of several possessions, including a number of credits and several grenades that she slung in her bag, just in case.

* * *

It was the next day that, both swallowing reluctance, they made their way to the Undercity. In the sunless, underground village, even Ashi was uncomfortable. "This place is awful," she had commented the moment they stepped off the rickety elevator, before Carth's eyes had even begun to adjust to the dim half-light.

Once he could see, he couldn't help but agree, horrified at the conditions they could force people to live in. The small village was a combination of huts, small fires for light made by burning heaps of garbage, and rubble of all shapes and sizes. The ground was rough, and a few pale, scraggly plants grew tentatively with no sunlight to nurture them. The entire village was encased by a huge wall that kept mutants out; it was the only thing in the place that looked well taken care of, including all the people.

As quickly as they could, they made their way to the gate—although with such grimness, it might as well have been the gallows. A couple people tried to stop them—first two young boys trying to mug them, who were easily won over with twenty credits, and then a shrunken, skeletal old man who insisted Ashi was the savior he'd been waiting for. Carth's immediate speculation, '_crazy enough to be dangerous_', was entertaining, but unfortunately seemed fairly accurate. Still, Ashi felt bad for the man, and listened to him long enough to accidentally promise to find his apprentice, and bring back her journal. At that point, Carth pulled her away, reminding her why they were there in the first place. Ashi grew instantly sullen at the mention of Bastila, but obligingly left the old man, now gracing the lightless world with a gummy, toothless grin.

They found the gate to the outer area eventually, just in time to stumble into an argument. Outside, a terrified man was being chased by a rakghoul, while his wife, a young woman who looked much older than she must have been, implored the gate guard to let him in. "I… I can't," sighed the guard, his face torn with indecision. "Not while the rakghouls are so close."

Shock colored Ashi's face immediately: the monster was far from the gate, a blotch of faraway white, and unless the creatures were sprinters, she doubted it posed any threat. "You'll let it kill him while you watch?" she demanded.

"If I open the gate, they'll kill us all!" he snapped. "Unless _you_ want to do something, up-worlder?" he added challengingly. The man was obviously familiar with people from the Upper and Lower cities who could care less about their problems.

Ashi glared at him, drawing her vibroblade, as Carth sighed and muttered under his breath at her typical recklessness. "Hell yeah, I'll _do_ something about it," she snapped. "Open the gate, old man; _I'll_ kill the rakghouls."

The guard's eyes widened. "You'd risk your life for a stranger, and an Outcast?" He chuckled wryly. "You're brave, up-worlder."

"Or stupid," interjected Carth. Ashi glared sharply at him.

"Okay, I'll open the gate," said the guard, "but you have to be quick." He pressed a button, and the rusty gate swung open. Ashi and Carth rushed through, coming face-to-face with the panicked Outcast. He raced up to her and clutched her arm desperately.

"Help!" he shrieked. "It's going to kill me!"

Ashi rolled her eyes and then, as she looked up, found the fairly legitimate cause for his panic. In front of her was a horrible-looking mutant. It was no longer a blotch of white, but a tangle of dead, reeking flesh and red eyes, along with fangs dripping bright green venom. For a moment, its gaze flickered across the three of them, but then it lunged for Ashi.

She whirled away, dodging, and its claw slashed through the air where her face had been a moment ago. Swinging the vibroblade expertly, she took an arm off the creature, but it hardly even slowed it down. It swung at her, with a strength that she hadn't expected, and her blade was wrenched from her grasp. She froze in terror—_oh dear space, killed by a mutant in the middle of a scum pit surrounded by nobody I particularly like except a Republic officer_—but the next second a blaster shot rang out and the rakghoul keeled over, a hole in its head.

Ashi turned, her face ashen, and grinned weakly at Carth. "Thanks, flyboy. I owe you. Uh, again." She picked up her blade from the gray, cracked ground, before turning to the Outcast. "Are you okay?"

"I…I think so," he stuttered.

"Get back in, then. You're not a fighter," she snapped. He grimaced and hurried back into the settlement. Ashi nodded to his wife, and then started to look around, raising a hand to shield her eyes more from habit than necessity. "See Mission anywhere, flyboy?"

No sooner were the words out of her mouth than they heard a frantic cry, and saw a small blue figure racing towards them. "Ashi! Ashi, thank space it's you!" yelped the girl, her eyes lighting on them. "You gotta help me! No one else will help me, even the Beks won't help me, but you'll help me, right? Please? I can't just leave him, he's my best friend!" she cried, her voice panicked and words stumbling over one another as she sprinted to where they stood.

"Whoa, Mission, calm down," instructed Ashi, grabbing the frantic Twi'lek girl by the shoulder and spinning her to look her in the eyes. "What the hell is wrong? And," she added, immediately noticing the absence of Wookiee, "where's Zaalbar?"

The name sent Mission nearly to tears. "Slavers, Ashi!" she finally managed. "They were waiting for us in the sewers, right? And Big Z swiped at one and yelled for me to run, so I did, 'cause I thought he'd be right behind me, you know, but then he wasn't, and they're gonna sell him and I'll never see him again, never!"

"Okay, first off," Ashi instructed flatly, "_relax_. Deep breaths."

Admittedly, Mission took a deep breath, but then burst out talking again. "You're gonna help me, right, Ashi? You get that I can't leave him, right? I mean they're slavers, Ash, and he's my friend, and—"

Ashi sighed. "Yeah, and yeah, and yes, I hate slavers too. Calm down. But," she added, raising an eyebrow. "You have to help me get into the Vulkar base if I do, all right?"

Mission nodded emphatically. "No problemo. I hate those Vulkars; they're core-slimes. I can get you into the base, easy, but first we go after Big Z, right?"

Assuring her that they would, Ashi managed finally to calm the girl down, before pulling a blaster from the holster on her waist and tossing it to her. Mission caught it was a very disturbing expertise. "I figure you'll want to be coming too. You can fire that, right, kid?"

Mission grinned. "You bet." Ashi was almost surprised she didn't take offense at the nickname, but she seemed to pick up on it being more of an affection thing than an insult.

"First off, though, I have to help a geezer," she added reluctantly. "We're going to go look for the old guy's apprentice, okay?"

Carth nodded. He was half-surprised Ashi was bothering at all, but starting to consider that maybe there was slightly more than pure recklessness and impulse in her motives. In spite of all his caution, he was beginning to at least trust that she might be a good person, especially after watching her take care of Mission. The girl, meanwhile—speak of the devil—looked reluctant to spend any time not looking for Zaalbar, but wisely decided not to push her luck.

They set off through the Undercity, which the soldier decided was definitely only getting worse with every new sight. It was like being inside a giant skeleton: the foundations of the city above towered like ribs, but where they were they were left with shrapnel and broken bones littering the world around. The earth rose and fell in waves of worn, lifeless gray, a still ocean that spawned intermittent packs of rakghouls. It was slow, painful going, more from the setting than from the task itself, but eventually they managed to find a ravaged corpse with an electronic journal. Ashi flicked through it, ignoring the bloodstains coating the sides and splattered over the screen, and then gave them a sad nod: it was what remained of the strange old man's apprentice.

They had begun to head back to break the news to him, but Carth stopped when he noticed a flash of motion near one of the skeletal escape pods. "There's something over there!" he hissed. Ashi glanced up in interest, and then squinted. The next second, her face broke into a surprised grin.

"There's _people_ over there," she nodded, and changed direction, walking over.

Carth stared—he hadn't intended for her to go introduce herself—but followed behind with his hand on his blaster in case they weren't quite as friendly as her. However, to her credit, Ashi eyed the group carefully as she approached. They were all humanoid, men in their thirties or so, except for the biggest one. He was tall and silver-haired, but the thing Ashi noticed first was his muscular build. He wore a sleeveless black shirt and an orange vest, but she could still see the outlines of muscles, and various scars that marked the rest of his body. It occurred to her how many there were with a surprised respect. Then she frowned. This was no ordinary scavenger. In fact…

She took a closer look, and her eyes widened. That was a fracking _Mandalorian_. What was he doing on a city planet, leading a field trip in the Undercity?

Suddenly, one of the men caught sight of her, paling instantly. _Good_, Ashi thought dryly; _he knows to be scared of me_. Loudly, he called out to her, "Hey, you! Don't… don't move! I'm not afraid to use this blaster if I have to!"

She raised her eyebrows. "Really?" she wondered skeptically, completely ignoring the order to stand still. Canderous was equally unimpressed.

"Shut the frack up, kid," he snapped. "We've already lost enough men to those damned rakghouls. Last thing we need is more casualties from a needless firefight."

Embarrassed, the man lowered his blaster, and Ashi, Carth, and Mission approached. "From the looks of you," the Mandalorian grunted, "you're down here for the same reason we are—salvage. Let me give you some advice: forget about it. Just get out of here and back where you came from."

Ashi crossed her arms, eyes narrowing. "Yeah? That a threat?"

"Mandalorians don't make threats," he replied calmly. "We make promises. And this isn't a good place to stand around chatting. The place is crawling with rakghouls—I've already lost a half dozen men to those monsters."

The nervous man started suddenly, and then pointed with a quivering finger over Ashi's shoulder. "Canderous!" he exclaimed. "I heard something over… over there!" He had gone pale, and Ashi spun and saw why: a herd of rakghouls was swarming towards them in a massive wave of mutant white flesh.

"Mission!" Ashi barked. "Behind me and Carth!" Intelligently, the girl made no objection. "Don't let them bite you," she instructed to Carth, who nodded, and then added, "Cover me, yeah?"

Again, he nodded in affirmation. She grabbed a plasma grenade from her belt and pulled the pin, tossing it into the swarm and following it up with a couple more. Fiery explosions cut chunks in the herd, but more still poured toward them. Ashi glanced at Carth, making sure he had her back—he gave her the slightest nod, and she smiled back, her version of a warning—before racing in to meet them head-on.

Canderous had seen what she was doing, and quickly pointed a couple of his men to join her in hand-to-hand, preventing her from being the only target. Meanwhile, the fastest of the mutants had caught up to Ashi, but she ran one through with a single stroke, and then cut off another's head with the backlash. Canderous's apparent belief she couldn't fight for herself annoyed her, and she had resolved to prove her own worth.

The other men weren't as good, or as lucky, as her. The rakghouls found them easier targets, and as a giant mass, almost its own entity, the herd engulfed them. Nonetheless, Ashi fought on, and Carth and Mission covered her where she couldn't cover herself. After several grueling minutes, the rakghouls were gone, and Ashi jogged back to the rest of them with a smug grin.

Canderous looked grudgingly impressed that she had survived. Unfortunately, the same couldn't be said for the majority of his posse. Several human corpses littered the ground among the rakghoul ones.

"Damn," he growled. "I told Davik this salvage mission was a bad idea. His men aren't trained for this kind of thing, and I can't fracking babysit them all." None of the men who were left looked insulted at the statement of fact. "Come on," said the Mandalorian sharply. "We're getting out of here before I lose someone else."

He spared Ashi and her friends one final glance. "You'd be smart to get out of here too," he told them, speaking to her. "I don't care how well you fight."

Ashi allowed herself a small moment of satisfaction, accepting it as his acknowledgment of her ability, but then smirked. "What, you running away?"

Carth rolled his eyes, unimpressed, but Mission and a couple men gasped quietly. Canderous just snorted. "Another day, I'd kill you for that," he replied indifferently.

She smiled. "Oh, well. Another day."

Canderous nodded, and then motioned to his men. "Come on, boys; let's move out."

They marched away, Canderous the only one with any visible confidence. Ashi grinned. "Hey, flyboy, looks like you're not the only one who talks like that after all."

He ignored her, and Mission snickered, but then remembered with a jolt why they were there in the first place. "Ashi, seriously, can we, uh, go find Big Z?" she asked, biting her lip, and Ashi nodded quickly.

"Right," she replied. "Okay, then, kid, lead the way… to the…" Her voice trailed off as she remembered where Zaalbar was. _Damn it_, she cursed to herself, as the suddenly effervescent girl led them eagerly to the sewer entrance. _Mission, you're going to owe me.

* * *

_

Water dripped from a dark, moldy metal ceiling, hung suspended in the air for a moment, and then landed on Ashi cheek. She yelped, and then pulled a face, scrubbing it away quickly with the back of her hand. At this point, no one even glanced up—it wasn't the first time. They had been in the sewers ten minutes, and already it disgusted her. In fact, she thought, glancing at the rusted metal walls and then the sewage flowing freely below the catwalk they stood on, it seemed impossible to think of anyone who wouldn't be disgusted.

Except, that was, for Mission, who seemed too anxious to think about anything but her best friend. For once in her lifetime, she was completely silent, apart from when they ran into rakghouls or Gammorean slaver patrols. At that point, she was perfectly happy to yell at either of them as she picked them off with expert sniper shots. Ashi added a fantastic repertoire of insults to the list of reasons she liked the girl.

Luckily, they stumbled onto a Gammorean patrol that they followed to their compound. The slavers were large and angry, but relatively easy to kill. After they finished, Mission hurried over to the door and picked the lock, revealing a bedraggled but ecstatic-looking Wookiee.

"Big Z, you're okay!" Mission squealed, rushing up to give Zaalbar a hug. She pulled away quickly, however, wrinkling her nose. "Ew, Zaalbar, you smell nasty." He shrugged, looking vaguely offended, and then barked a greeting to her in Shyriiwook, before glancing back at the other two. /Who have you brought with you, Mission?/

Mission turned, and smiled at Carth and Ashi. "You know Ash, and this is Carth. They helped me rescue you, Big Z."

Ashi stepped forward, smiling. /It was no problem/ she explained in Shyriiwook, with fluency that shouldn't have been physically possible.

Zaalbar's eyes widened beneath overgrown, shaggy hair. /You speak my language? That is impressive, among your people./ He then turned to Mission. /You say they helped you rescue me?/

Mission nodded, and Zaalbar looked again to Ashi. He appeared to be grateful, although it was hard to tell with all the fur in the way. /There is only one way to repay this, Ashi. I must swear you a lifedebt./

Mission's jaw dropped. "Whoa. _Whoa_," she repeated, finding nothing else to say. "Z, you sure?" But he nodded steadfastly, and so she turned her gaze to Ashi, eyes still wide and stunned. "Ash, Big Z's swearing you a Wookiee lifedebt. Do you know what that means?"

Ashi frowned. "It's some kind of loyalty vow, right?" She could speak enough Shyriiwook to get by, but didn't know as much as she suspected was needed for this.

Mission nodded seriously. "A lifedebt is the most solemn vow a Wookiee can make," she explained. "It means no matter where you go or what you do, Zaalbar will _always_ be there with you."

Zaalbar cleared his throat, giving Mission a glance to say her explanation had been enough, before bleating in Shyriiwook, /To you, Ashi Lucas, I swear a lifedebt. May my vow be as strong and timeless as the roots of the giant Wroshyr trees on my planet Kashyyyk./

His voice was strong and certain, echoing impressively against the background of water dripping onto metal. Ashi smiled, swallowing a grimace. _Space, I've got a goddamn Wookiee following me the rest of my life…_ "I'm honored to accept your vow," she told him, though, realizing this was probably something you didn't say no to. _Although I may have to do something about the smell._

Mission grinned. "And I go where Big Z goes, Ash, so I guess you're stuck with me too."

"Good," Ashi said, honestly this time, and added in Twi'leki, /Someone's got to be able to help me annoy Carth./ Mission smiled and nodded, laughing at the pilot's puzzled and frustrated expression when he caught his name.

"Now, about breaking into that base," continued Mission, a wicked grin forming on her face. "There's an entrance on the western side of the sewers I can help you find. And then it's straightforward; I just lead you through to the Vulkar base." She paused, and then added as an afterthought, gazing off into space, "I hope that giant rancor's not still there, though."

Ashi did a double take, spinning back to face the girl. "Giant _rancor_?" she repeated in horror. "And, um, why the hell is there a giant rancor in the sewers?"

Mission shrugged breezily. "I don't know. The Vulkars keep it as a guard, I think—ya know, feed it prisoners and stuff. I don't know, 'cause I figure I wouldn't want that thing within a mile a' me if I had a choice"—_what a smart girl_, thought Ashi dryly—"but they kind like big things with lots a' teeth, and… yeah. But I got past it before and stuff, so we should be fine."

Ashi didn't look convinced, but she nodded anyway, beginning to head in the direction Mission had pointed out. The girl had been right about one thing, at least; the way was relatively clear, and they didn't encounter anything too lethal until they reached an unusually thick door. Mission stopped sharply.

"The rancor's behind here," she said softly. "Be really careful, okay? 'Cause I heard they give it these chemicals and stuff to make it grow, right, and, y'know, you're really not s'posed to give things radioactive-type stuff to eat, but I heard it gave it…" She lowered her voice for effect. "_Powers_. Like, it's psychic and stuff—it can hear you, and…"

She trailed off. Ashi was staring. "Fine," Mission allowed tetchily. "So maybe it's not psychic. But this thing's crazy smart, okay? You gotta be _really_ careful."

Ashi nodded; Mission had made her point. Trying to rid her voice of apprehension, she asked, "Mission? Is it a _big _rancor?"

Mission hesitated nervously. "Compared to you? Yeah. Very."

"What about compared to Zaalbar?" Ashi asked, and Mission laughed briefly.

"Still massive," she said regretfully.

"And, uh, what are the chances it would eat us if I opened the door?"

Carth's eyes widened in disbelief, and he shook his head furiously. "What? No way, sister. You're not opening the door and waking up a fracking mutant rancor to satisfy your damn curiosity about how big it is."

Ashi rolled her eyes despairingly. "It's _important_," she snapped. "Mission? Do you think it would eat us?"

Mission looked horrified. "Um, probably, yeah. Before you could say 'wow, it is big.'" Carth almost cracked a smile at this, but Ashi looked unmoved. They both uttered muffled cries of protest as she reached out to the door and slid it open a crack. Ashi motioned sharply for them to be quiet, and then reached into her black bag with utter silence, pulling out a pair of night-vision goggles. She slipped them on over her eyes, before peering cautiously through the opening.

The goggles illuminated the massive room in varying shades of green, and she glanced around, eyes moving from rubble to corpses, both of which there were plenty. Then, a sudden snort from the far end of the room drew her gaze there, and she gasped, stunned.

The beast was as tall as five of Zaalbar, and twice as wide. It looked like it was asleep, but it was still probably the most frightening thing Ashi had ever seen. It was sewer-colored, huge and leathery, and had too many teeth for its mouth: they bulged out, overflowing around its jaw. Despite the amount, however, they all looked equally razor-sharp. Claws that must have been three feet long tipped all its limbs. Compared to this beast, Zaalbar was snack food, not to mention Ashi and Mission.

"Space!" she exclaimed in a whisper. "It's fracking huge!"

"Told ya," Mission grumbled, and then added edgily, "Now shut the door!"

Ashi pulled back readily, carefully closing the door behind her. As soon as it was shut, she turned back to them, slipping the neon green goggles up off her eyes. They tugged her hair upwards, messing it further up, but she neither noticed nor cared. "Okay," she conceded, looking grudgingly at Carth and Mission. "Maybe it is pretty big."

Mission nodded; it was only what she had expected to hear. "What do we do now, then?"

Ashi paused, cocking her head to the side in consideration. "Sneaking past's out of the question," she said disappointedly, and then, with a pointed look at the other two, added /Especially with Commander Colorblind and the walking carpet./

Mission snickered, causing both the Wookiee and the pilot to look suspicious, but then she grimaced. "So, you know, what do we do now?" she asked worriedly.

Ashi grinned; it was even more worrying than her indecision. "You," she said firmly, "are all going to stay here. And I'm going to go through the door. I don't want you following me; you won't be able to see, so you might accidentally blow yourselves up."

Carth's face grew even more anxious. "Just what are you planning?" he asked.

Ashi shrugged. "You'll see. Or not. Point is, I go out. And you—_all_ of you," she added emphatically, "stay behind this door, which will be closed. Don't come out until you hear a thud in about five minutes." She paused, and then clarified quickly, "Which will, by the way, be preceded by an explosion."

He frowned hesitantly. "How big a thud? You mean…"

His voice trailed off in stunned realization, and Ashi smirked. "That's right, flyboy. Rancor-sized." And before any of them could object, she pulled down the vision goggles and flipped on her stealth generator, rendering herself virtually invisible. Sliding the door open just wide enough for her to squeeze through, she brushed past and vanished into the room.

The first thing she noticed was that her concept of bad smells had reached a new low, and that was saying something after the Gammoreans. This place reeked of rotting meat, and she suspected that was from the rancor's past meals. Covering her mouth with her arm, and breathing in the familiar scent of the worn jacket instead, she made her way forward. Her gaze darted around the room with an expert's eye.

_It probably can't see really well… well, maybe it can, I don't know, but either way I'll have to make myself obvious, just in case. And so if I plant a couple frag mines here, to slow it down, and then the main field here..._

She moved around the room with the utmost care, sure to stay unnoticed for now. The basic plan was to lure the rancor into a huge pool of mines in the center of the room, by, naturally, doing something incredibly stupid. She looked around once, checking all the mines seemed to be in place, and then swallowed, grateful at least that no one could see the trepidation… no, screw _trepidation_. No one could see the fear on her face. There were quite a lot of ways this could go wrong, and she knew that too well.

For a moment, she wondered offhandedly why she was bothering with this. Risking her life for what: to rescue a Jedi?

And then next second, she realized how selfish of her that thought was, with an unpleasant jolt that sounded an awful lot like a conscience. Before she could reconsider, she deactivated her stealth generator and grabbed a flashlight off her belt, flicking it on so she couldn't be much more obvious. Pulling out her Echani blaster, she fired off a couple shots at the huge creature for good measure, and shouted, "Hey! Over here—dinner!"

The shots bounced off the rancor's leathery skin, but generally, it seemed to have the effect she'd hoped for and dreaded. The monster snorted and jerked awake, before turning in response to the shots, the light, and the shouting.

It charged.

Outside, her friends were torn between staying and going out there to see what in space she had decided to do, especially when the heard the yelling and the pounding footsteps, along with a deafening roar. Ashi hardly had time to think, _damn, it's fast_, before she was sprinting. "Come on, come on," she murmured under her breath, backing up. The beast slowed, and looked almost catlike as it gave the impression of playing with its food.

"Space," Ashi muttered. "I'm your prey, not your fracking entertainment." But this was even better. A couple steps, and it would trigger the minefield, and now it was going slow enough for them to work.

She told herself that, and tried not to look at the three-foot claws and giant teeth that glistened with saliva, and could probably rip her in two in one bite.

The rancor took another step forward, and there was a quick beep as the mines were triggered. It looked distracted by the sudden noise under its feet, and Ashi took advantage of the momentary diversion, turning and running full out. Because there was about to be that explosion she had talked about, and just like the thud, it had to be rancor-sized.

_Three…_ she sprinted, trying to get as far away as possible… _Two…_ no, she was still too close… _One_… no time left—dammit, this wasn't far enough but it had to be…

And then a huge explosion sounded behind her, and a wave of heat and shrapnel threw her several feet as if she was nothing more than a rag doll. Midair, she felt the slight zap of her stealth belt shorting out, although she heard nothing. There was time enough for a disturbing sense of déjà vu before she hit the ground. She landed on her wrist, and it twisted with a sickening crack, but she couldn't feel it; she was too overwhelmed by the sudden flash of light and pain that rushed through her head as it smacked against the floor. And there was something heavy and painful in her back, too, something that was jamming against her shoulder blade and cutting off her breathing.

The vision goggles were still on, dying her gaze green as she stared across the room from her position on the floor. She could see a trickle of something dark running down the lens, dripping onto the ground; with dizzy shock, she realized that it was blood. And someone, a blurry figure, was running across to her, too, and she saw who it was the next moment when the goggles picked up the luridly bright jacket. He raced over, kneeling beside her.

"What the hell did you do? Blow up the entire fracking sewers?" he demanded, his voice stunned and full of concern, which she thought was kind of nice.

She laughed—_something like that_—and then coughed weakly. Something warm and wet and dark splattered the scorched ground in front of her. "Not bad, huh?" she mumbled, before her thoughts and vision blurred simultaneously and everything went black.

Carth felt a flood of panic as Ashi blacked out, and reached for her neck, feeling for a pulse. It was there, but weakening fast. He could see a huge gash on her forehead that was dripping blood in an extremely macabre way, and suspected that wasn't all. Her wrist, too, which seemed to have taken the weight of her fall, was bent at an awkward angle, and he could see a shard of shrapnel sticking out of her back, near her shoulder blade.

He reached immediately for her black bag, which had been thrown onto her arm, and rooted through it, grabbing several medpacs. He took a shirt she had, too, and wrapping it around her head to stifle the bleed for a little while, as he gently loosened and slipped off the goggles. Next, he pulled off her jacket, tossing it to the side, and injected a shot of kolto into her arm. He glanced over her arm, and then sucked in a small breath as he saw her wrist, bent far too awkwardly with the fingers splayed. Carefully, he adjusted the limp hand, making sure it wouldn't reset the wrong way.

Mission and Zaalbar had reached him by now, both looking horrified. "Is she okay?" the girl demanded frantically. "She's okay, right?"

Carth shrugged helplessly, and Mission, taking a second look at Ashi, swallowed hard. "Um… what's that in her back?" she said slowly, her voice horrified.

Carth grimaced. "Shrapnel, I guess," he shrugged, anger and worry equal in his tone. "I don't know what she was thinking. Did she honestly think she could set off an explosion that big and not get caught in it?" He shook her head, obviously not waiting for an answer. "Look, if you don't want to look, don't. But someone's got to treat her."

Mission nodded, and then plopped down next to him. Carth looked over, evidently surprised, but she cocked her head stubbornly, and he disregarded it, deciding instead to see how bad Ashi's back wound was. He sat her up, and leant her forward slightly, beginning to peel the blood-soaked shirt off her back. With a sudden jolt, he was reminded of the cantina and the Sith party.

He told himself fiercely that there was nothing romantic about this—he was only treating a comrade—as he hesitated. He felt stupidly, irrationally uncomfortable. Angrily, he fought down the feeling, motioning for Mission to pass him a medpac.

She gave a small '_oh_' and quickly obliged, and he stuck it quickly into Ashi's side—it would help relieve the pain for now. As he injected it, she relaxed visibly, but then suddenly stirred. "Mm… thanks, love," she sighed, a faint smile on her lips.

Carth almost recoiled in shock, but then grinned incredulously. "Ashi?"

Mission giggled uncertainly—on one hand, Ashi was hurt; on the other, it was going to be great asking her about this when she was better. But meanwhile, Ashi was dreaming, she supposed…

* * *

…_Outside a cave on a strange planet, she stumbled and collapsed into a field. Beige grass scratched her face as she lay motionless, her cheek pressed against the ground. It was vaguely annoying, but on the other hand, she couldn't move. Someone hurried up behind her, cursing as she moaned in pain. She could feel the poison seeping like ice in her bloodstream. She was going to die, she decided, and cried out in pain as a wound on her stomach burned. Couldn't it at least not hurt?_

"_Relax," said a deep, soothing voice, and warm arms encircled her. She was rolled off her stomach and onto her back, and her head lolled weakly, but a strong hand was behind it, cradling her gently. "I can heal you, but you have to hold still." _

_She whimpered, but did as instructed; she hadn't heard a thing he'd said beyond 'relax', but she trusted him enough to obey regardless. The next moment, she relaxed with a faint smile as she felt the poison fade away. "Thanks, love," she murmured weakly, and he sighed in relief. Slowly, she opened her eyes to look at the man who had his arms around her. He was blonde and good looking, with deep gray eyes that were full of concern. As she focused on him, his face broke into a dazzling smile._

"_Thank the Force you're all right," he whispered, and lifted her head slowly, tilting his down so their lips met…

* * *

_

As Ashi came to, the first thing she noticed was that she was no longer in a field. Without her even opening her eyes, the smell told her she was still in the sewers. Her nose cried out in protest and she wished she had her jacket to cover it. The second thing she noticed, which seemed much more important all of a sudden, was she was sitting up, and despite the different scenery, _someone_ had his hands all over her. She tried to ignore a sudden and very confusing shiver that ran down her spine at the warm touch, and pulled away groggily.

"Hey," she mumbled resentfully, her voice slurred. "If that's what you want, flyboy, there's a reason we have cantina dancers."

She heard a small bubbly laugh, full of relief. "Well, she's fine," said Mission, who grinned as Carth flushed, visible even in the dark sewer. Then, however, he smirked back.

"What did you call me there?" he asked, and Ashi could hear the grin in his voice.

She frowned, genuinely puzzled. "Um, flyboy?"

"No, before that." Carth still sounded amused, and it began to bother her.

"I think that was when I passed out, actually," she replied slowly. _Oh, space. I didn't sleeptalk, did I?_

He raised his eyebrows. "'Love' doesn't sound familiar, then?"

She snorted, swallowing a rush of embarrassment. "Like I'm going to be calling you that. In your dreams, maybe." Already, the images were slipping away. She tried to remember what the man had looked like: he had seemed oddly familiar, but she had certainly never seen him before. Quickly changing the subject, she added conversationally, "My shoulder hurts, by the way."

He grimaced, concentrating again. "Have any idea how many medpacs I've given you already?" he wondered, but glanced over it nonetheless, running his fingers gingerly around the shrapnel. "Yeah, I can bet. You've got a big piece of something in your back, I'm going to take a look."

Ashi sighed wearily. "And I'm supposed to believe that's _all_ you're looking at?"

Carth went even redder as Mission laughed, but, irritated at the fun at his expense, he frowned exasperatedly. "Look, I don't know if you realize, but you have a chunk of floor sticking out of you from your genius stunt with the rancor…"

She moaned quietly. "That's what it is? And of course I fracking _realize_, you idiot, I can _feel_ it. You going to do something about it, or what?"

Her words, rueful and making no effort to hide their distress, filled Carth instantly with guilt. Here he was, busy being useless, while she was in pain. He lifted up the back of her shirt gently, trying fruitlessly to dry some of the blood with it. Ashi sighed, and carefully reached to her head with her good wrist, passing him the shirt. He took it gratefully, wiping away some of the drying blood, before hesitantly pulled a chunk of shrapnel out of her shoulder. Ashi winced.

"I need more fracking kolto," she muttered resentfully. Mission, deciding there was no point watching Ashi be petulant now she knew she was all right, got up and walked off, probably to see what else had survived the explosion. Zaalbar paused, and then followed, seeming satisfied that Ashi was in good hands.

Meanwhile, Carth grabbed another medpac, jabbing it into Ashi's back to heal the cut that was now bleeding freely. She hissed in pain. "Damn it! Warn me next time you do that."

He shook his head in slight frustration, and then frowned. "Ashi, you have a flashlight?"

She shrugged. "You need it?"

He nodded, adding as she passed it to him, "I need to make sure there's nothing in the wound before it heals." He flicked on the light, turning it to her back, and, the next moment, felt his jaw drop. His attention was completely distracted from the wound on her shoulder to a huge scar that sprawled, a ghastly tattoo, across her back. It was like a starburst, with a concentration in the center that moved outward, peppered with cuts and shadows like bruises. Her back was smoothed over, for the most part, but the dark, gruesome spiderweb of scars was still clearly visible, inked into the pale skin.

Carth stared at the extent of the damage with horror and a morbid fascination, wondering briefly how anyone could possibly survive an injury like that. Cautiously, but without thinking, he ran his fingers across the main scar, and Ashi gave a slight shiver. Quickly, however, she turned her head, fixing him with an acerbic glare over her shoulder to save face.

"I thought you said you wouldn't be looking at anything else," she said sharply, though he could hear the hint of playfulness that told him she didn't really care, and probably wasn't that surprised either.

He snapped back to anyway and gave the now-healing wound a once-over, before sliding her shirt back down and handing her the extra medpacs. She nodded, and tossed all but one in her bag, before asking, "Carth? What time is it?"

He shrugged, before checking his comm. "Night," he replied offhandedly, and then added, "Why? You tired?"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Yeah, genius, I hear it's a side effect of almost blowing yourself up." This was spoken with calm, accustomed nonchalance, but the next second she yawned deeply, reaching up with her uninjured wrist to cover her mouth. Carth grinned.

"You're exhausted," he observed. "And you're going to need some time to recover from all your injuries, anyway. You should rest."

She looked around, an expression of distaste on her face. "Here? But it smells like rancor flambé."

He laughed, shaking his head. "Whose fault is that?"

Ashi scowled. "You're lucky I'm too tired to argue," she muttered, before lowering herself slowly back to the ground. She folded her arms under her head as a makeshift pillow, and then closed her eyes.

She couldn't fall asleep, though. She ached all over, even with all the kolto, but she wasn't going to use another medpac and risk the inebriation that came from too many. She was also very cold, probably from the blood loss or something equally not her fault. Sighing, and unable to keep from sounding rueful, she rolled over, trying to find a more comfortable position, but it didn't help. When she opened her eyes again, Carth was staring at her.

"You're shivering," he said worriedly, before she could comment. Ashi rolled her eyes.

"Shaking from blood loss, Republic, it's a different thing," she snapped, but he didn't back off like she'd expected.

"Here," he said, and slipped off his flight jacket, wrapping it around her shoulders gently. She didn't refuse it—she was too cold, and pride was only important to a certain point—but did smirk lightly.

"Is it my color?" she asked mock-seriously, struggling to keep a laugh out of her voice.

Carth snorted dryly. "You don't have to keep it," he offered, holding out a hand to take it back.

Ashi frowned and curled up tighter, wrapping the jacket closely around her. "No thanks. I'll give you this, flyboy, it is warm."

He nodded. "Good," he replied with a smile, and then glanced away. Ashi rolled over, trying to fall asleep, but it was still hard when the smell of roasted sewer mutant was fresh and ever-present in the air. She pulled the jacket over her face and breathed in. To her surprise, the smell was nice: sort of warm, in a way, and oddly comforting. She kept it over her nose, and slowly relaxed as her breathing deepened.

A few minutes later, Carth looked over, and couldn't help a smile. Ashi was fast asleep, the jacket wrapped around her and draped over her face, clashing magnificently with her fiery hair. Her expression was, despite all she had had to contend with that day, untroubled and calm. She looked the most peaceful he had ever seen her. He smiled, and then slowly lay down, folding his arms behind his head, and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**And that's a wrap. Next time... well, the chapter's called "terminal velocity". Look that one up if you haven't skydived or played portal (and if you have, good for you. For me, that one's right up there with kotor). But anyway, I digress. If you looked it up, or you're smart and know what it means, that I figure you're probably guessing what comes next. If not, here's a quote:**

**Mission: She's going to do something stupid, isn't she?  
Carth: ...Yeah. I think so.**


	5. Velocity

**Terminal: 1. at the end or extremity of something; 2. causing the end of life  
Velocity: rapidity of action or reaction; speed**

**So terminal velocity means intense, lethal speed. However, put the two words together, and it's the constant speed you eventually maintain when you're falling. Yes, that's right: for once, physics is actually helping me (go figure)**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR

* * *

**

If it was dark, it shouldn't have to be morning.

Ashi didn't open her eyes, but she could see through her eyelids it was dark. To her, that was enough reason not to get up. She made herself forcibly limp, and ignored the hand on her arm, shaking her lightly.

"Ashi?" called a young voice. She mumbled something along the lines of 'go away', although it came out so bleary that she wasn't quite sure anyone besides her had understood. There was a deeper, older laugh, and the young voice sighed exasperatedly. "Well, someone's not a morning person."

"She's tired," said the man. "She had a lot to deal with yesterday." _Thank you_, Ashi thought, but her gratitude was short-lived, when the voice continued, "But I guess we should get going. Let me get her." _Damn._ "Ashi?" She felt a larger hand on her shoulder, shaking her slowly but gently. "Come on, I want my jacket back."

The absurdity of this statement was enough to make her open her eyes groggily. "What?" she asked brilliantly, her voice mumbled, as she looked around, and then realized what he had meant. She still had his stunningly bright jacket wrapped around her, her face buried in the collar for her nose's sake. Slowly, she sat up, rubbing her eyes, and then looked up at Carth. He only had on a black short-sleeved shirt, fitted tightly against abs she hadn't quite realized he'd had. To her disblief, she found herself staring slightly before snapping quickly out of it and tossed him the jacket. "Thanks," she muttered.

He nodded his gratitude, slipping it on, and then grinned cheekily. "Morning, sunshine," he said, glancing at her disheveled clothes and hair.

The general scruffiness was quickly partnered by a roll of her eyes. "Sarcasm's a better look on me," she told him, pushing hair away from her face.

Mission hurried over, dragging Zaalbar in her wake and looking horrifically perky for the morning. "Come on," she chirped. "We're breaking into the Vulkar base today, aren't we? I can come, right? Right, Ash, please, please, I can help, I'll be helpful, really."

"Yeah, sure," mumbled Ashi wearily. Mission beamed and then, taking a closer look at her friend, reluctantly bit her tongue; she seemed to understand that Ashi needed a moment to wake up. The smuggler looked around for a few moments, before wondering hopefully, "No one has any breakfast, do they?"

Mission glanced away, biting her lip. "Well, we _had_ some breakfast," she said brightly, "but, uh, Z's a growing Wookiee, and you were sleeping…"

Zaalbar hung his head apologetically, but Ashi just shrugged and grabbed her bag. "Whatever, " she replied calmly, slinging it over her shoulder. "Come on"—and now, breakfast or no breakfast, she was grinning widely—"let's go interfere in a gang war."

* * *

Ashi reached into her bag, frowning a little as she rooted around. Finally, a grin lit up her face as she pulled out the prototype accelerator and placed it on the desk. Gadon smiled widely as he realized what it was.

"I take it your break-in was a success, then."

Ashi nodded. "Right—oh, and I killed the rancor in the sewers. But, uh, you may want to just take my word for it, because it's a little messy down there." She grinned cheerfully, even as Carth rolled his eyes and muttered something about insanity.

Gadon laughed, but then glanced down at the piece of technology in front of him. He picked it up, running a thumb across a grease smudge on its side; his eyes, unseeing as they might be, were focused intently on it for a moment, an expert's gaze, before he raised them back to Ashi. "The Beks greatly appreciate your help, Ashi Lucas," he said slowly. "We are all extremely grateful, and I want to help show that gratitude by giving you a favor to help you save your friend."

Ashi's eyebrows raised in surprise. "Beyond letting me ride for you guys?"

The Hidden Bek leader nodded, eyes darting almost imperceptibly to the accelerator and then back to her. "I'm going to let you ride the swoop with the prototype accelerator installed!"

Ashi grinned, but then as his words sunk in, it shrank, years of cynicism rushing to fill her face. "That's really generous, Gadon," she replied calmly, "but it makes no sense. You'd want an experienced rider on that swoop. What aren't you telling me?"

He sighed, shoulders rising and falling with the breath. "You're a very perceptive girl. There is a _slight_ problem… the accelerator is somewhat unstable, and there's a chance it could, well... explode during the race." A grimace accompanied the words, clearly Gadon's realization that there was no way to make it sound good. "Obviously, none of my riders are willing to ride it, but I thought since you broke into the Vulkar base without a second thought, maybe you were willing to take this chance to rescue your friend."

"She's not my friend," Ashi said reflexively, but then glanced back at Carth. Well, she'd promised to help him, and if she intended to earn his trust—even just to prove a point—she couldn't only do it halfway. "Yeah, all right," she said, eyes fixed firmly on the solider as she spoke to Gadon. "I'll do it."

Mission's eyes widened, and Carth's mouth dropped open, both obviously about to object. Gadon smiled.

"Wonderful," he said. His eyebrows, still fractionally raised, implied he was speculating on exactly what Ashi's reasoning had been, but he didn't ask. "The race is in a bit less than a week's time," he continued instead. "Until then you can stay here in the Bek base."

Needless to say, all of them were happy to agree. The Hidden Beks' hideout was crowded and rowdy, but it was miles better from the sewers or even their Upper City apartment. But if any of them had hoped for the rest they'd earned, they were very disappointed, especially in Ashi's case. Now that she was a rider, any free moment she had came tied to the knowledge that she should be doing something productive instead of enjoying it. Training for the race was intense, and any time she wasn't spending on the practice track, she was with the swoop mechanics, trying to learn everything she could learn about the bikes. There wasn't much _to_ a swoop bike, but she was determined to learn all she could about everything she could. Her only free time was the six hours she spent crashed out in her bunk, and the mealtimes—well, technically free time, but she'd spent several meals with the riders, learning all she could about the races.

After her final practice run, the day before the race, Ashi met Carth, Mission, and Zaalbar for dinner. Zaalbar ate and left quickly, though—he was only the sociable type with Mission around, and she had quickly found a group of teenage Beks to sit with. That quickly left Ashi and Carth together, marooned in the middle of a vague awkward silence.

She poked halfheartedly at the food, and he wondered, glancing over at her, if she was nervous. "You still want to do the race?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

She shrugged, raising one shoulder lackadaisically. "Well, I'm not backing out, if that's what you mean. Who else would race, Mission?"

Carth raised an eyebrow, taking a bite of the food. "Probably," he mused. "If you'd let her." He paused for a moment, looking at her inquisitively—she didn't glance up from her plate, not even to smile—before he opened his mouth again, a question he'd had for almost a week demanding to be asked. "I was wondering," he began curiously, and then paused, giving an uncertain half-grin. "How did you get that scar on your back?"

Ashi did look up now, smirking mischievously. "Checking me out, flyboy?" She let him stumble for a moment, before straightening, pushing her plate away slightly. "Let me guess—you're wondering how the hell I survived that one, right?"

"Well… yeah," he admitted—she'd hit the nail on the head. "Pretty much."

Ashi shook her head slowly, grinning. "Almost didn't, actually. My crew and I got in a hyperspace accident out on the Rim, smuggling spice and stuff. Only we were a little short for time on the order, so Virden—our pilot—" she added, by way of explanation, "might have been speeding. Possibly in a zone where he wasn't supposed to."

She looked up at him and frowned irritably; he looked extraordinarily disapproving. A disjointed image of an old man in Jedi robes, with a sour, pinched expression, flew through her mind, before she replied, "Don't look at me like that." Her voice was sharp, not because of him but because of what his expression represented—the general misconceptions everyone seemed to enjoy forming about her. "He loved flying, and he was good at it. Speeding wasn't a big thing."

His face hadn't changed, and she rolled her eyes. "We were kids, okay? Virden was twenty; I was sixteen or seventeen." She sounded offhand, but he suspected from her tone that she knew exactly how old she had been. "We lived for this," she declared, and he thought he heard a momentary dash of nostalgia in her voice. "But come on," she added, shaking her head. "You can't have been _that_ mature when you were a teenager."

Carth shrugged. "When I was seventeen, I was in the Republic academy, training," he replied, his voice reproachful whether he intended it to be or not.

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Well, space, Republic, I can't help it if you never lived it up a little. And I bet my childhood was a lot more exciting that yours."

She didn't seem too irritated, but Carth quickly changed the subject anyway. "The hyperspace accident?" he prompted.

"Right," she nodded, lacing her fingers and leaning forward intently. "So we were out on the Rim, and we got in a huge accident. Hit an asteroid field, right, and our engine blew. The whole fracking bridge exploded," she said, gesturing theatrically with her hands, "and we went down over a planet."

She paused, letting her story sink in, and Carth was sure his face betrayed his shock. That sounded like a hell of a crash.

"I woke up a few days later in a kolto tank," she continued. "Only good thing was that we crashed close enough to a city to get medics on the scene. I was in bad shape, as I bet you can imagine. And I was still the… the only one that survived."

She broke off, looking down so her hair obscured her face, and he waited, until lifted her head again. She was biting her lip, and her eyes looked a little wet, although a moment later that was gone, and he imagined it might have been the light. Regardless, however, he could tell that remembering the event had upset her, and he felt guilty. It was hard to lose everything in one blow; he knew that well enough.

"Sorry," he offered apologetically, and she nodded. They sat in silence, and then Ashi grinned.

"Well. Not a bad story, anyway."

Carth laughed, and then there was another pause, before he looked over. She had an indecisive look on her face, as if she wanted to ask something but was debating it. "What's on your mind?" he asked.

"It's that obvious?" Ashi grinned, but then a little seriousness spread over her face. "I just wanted to ask you a couple questions."

He couldn't help frowning, as he realized her curiosity was going to be insatiable. "Oh, so you want to argue some more, is that it?" he snapped, his tone harsher than he intended. Ashi just shrugged, with a half-smile that didn't touch her eyes.

"Sure, I'm always up for a good fight."

He laughed, realizing it might actually be the truth. "Can't say I've ever met a woman quite like you before. You're really something."

Ashi nodded seriously. "Yep. I get that a lot."

Then he paused, and the laughter dried up. "But what's this all about, really?" he asked.

It was her instinct to shrug—_I don't know, Carth, maybe I'm just obnoxious_—but it _was_ about something, and not just her insatiable curiosity. "You don't trust me. I just want to know why." Her eyes were full of hurt; it could have been to prove a point, but Carth, skeptical as he was, felt sure it was genuine. "Is it because I'm a smuggler? I can't help that; it's just what I do. I don't hold a grudge against you…"

She paused as he raised his eyebrows incredulously.

"Okay, but I don't hold a _big_ grudge against you. I mean, I call you names and stuff, but that's just like I call Mission kid. It's not derogatory." She hesitated, and then added, "I don't get why you won't trust me, is all… why you won't even give me the opportunity to earn your trust."

He slumped at her words, which stung more than he suspected she knew, and put his head in his hands. "Look, Ashi, it's not anything you've done. This is, believe it or not, nothing to do with you. I just don't trust easily, and for good reasons—_which are my own_."

Ashi snorted, unimpressed. "But we're working together, regardless of whether you like me or not," she replied, "so it has a hell of a lot to do with me."

He glared at her, but she stared him down just as determinedly, the corners of her lips twitching into the faintest smirk. He couldn't argue—rather, he could, but she doubted that he really would. She was right: throwing up his hands, he sighed resignedly. "Ah, damn it. I suppose I won't get any rest until I talk." He glanced up at Ashi, who shook her head in answer. "You want to know why I don't trust anyone? Fine; here goes." Carth tilted his chair back, closing his eyes and running a hand through his hair as he let himself remember.

"Five years ago the Jedi had just finished the war with the Mandalorians. Revan and Malak were war heroes, and I was damn proud"—vicious cynicism here, scathing and enough to make her lean back slightly—"to have served in the fleet. It was a complete shock when they turned on us, invading the Republic while we were still weak. Nobody knew what to think, least of all me. Our heroes had become brutal conquering Sith, and we were all but helpless to them. Think about it—if you can't even trust the best of the Jedi, who can you trust?"

She grimaced. "That's tough, I guess. But okay, so they went to the dark side… what makes it so personal?"

He shook his head; she didn't understand. Fair enough—he hadn't told her the whole story. "It's not them. There were others, good men; trusted men who turned on us and served their cause. Malak, Revan and the Sith deserve to die for what they did. Well," he added with a wry smile, "guess Revan already is dead, huh? Betrayed by Malak… but that's just the way of the Sith."

His humor disappeared, however, the next moment, borne easily away by anger. "But the ones that fled the Republic and joined them are even worse. The dark side has nothing to do with why those people joined the Sith." He gritted his teeth, a dark fury in his eyes. "They deserve no mercy."

Ashi flinched away from him, slightly scared by his sudden rage. It was a different fear than she had felt with the rancor: there, at least she had known what to fear. With Carth, she could suddenly cross a line, or force him to cross one, and never know until it was too late to take it back. "I assume this is where it gets personal?" she wondered. "I mean, you sound a little angry when you say that."

He sighed, apology apparent in his eyes as he saw her cringing away from him. "I know. I—I should apologize for that. It's just… I've grown so accustomed to expecting the worst in people. You've done nothing to prove that this is anything more than paranoia"—_yes_, she thought, _stop right there, that's good enough_, but of course he didn't—"but I'm not going to stop watching you. I'm not built that way, period."

Well, he had apologized, which was more of a victory than she had expected. On the other hand, however, the follow-up had pretty much negated it. Ashi shook her head contemptuously. "Not built that way? That sounds like an excuse, and a pretty awful one at that."

Suddenly, with no warning, Carth stood up and stormed away. Ashi realized she had crossed a line. She debated hurrying after him, but decided it was better to let him cool off on his own. Picking up her plate, she moved over to sit with the swoop jocks, full of questions about the race the next day.

* * *

The morning of the swoop championship, Ashi was shaken awake by one of the Beks whose name she hadn't yet even tried to learn, and taken to get her racer's gear—tight-fitting leather; they'd assured her it had to do with friction, but she suspected it was just a perk for the fans. In a hurry, she didn't have time to grab breakfast, but it didn't matter. She probably couldn't have eaten; while not many things made her nervous, swoop racing was new to her, and seemed to be one of the few. First of all, the mechanics had warned her that the swoop could only run so many heats, so she had better make the ones she had count. And then there was, of course, the side possibility that it would explode before she could run out of heats.

But all her worry evaporated when a Bek mechanic came to lead her down to the swoop tracks. Riders for both sides were already there, and though there was the subtle jitter of anticipation, almost everyone was more excited than fearful. Racing in the championship was a huge honor, and, for most of them, their one shot at the big time, so no one was going to dare have any regrets. The cheerful attitude was contagious, and Ashi felt reassured as she sat down with her new friends, fingers drumming eagerly on the helmet in her hands.

The swoop course was flanked on either side by stands, and, as the morning progressed, they began first filling and then overflowing with people. She looked for Carth or Mission and Zaalbar every so often, but couldn't spot any of them in the crowd. She did, however, see the Vulkar prize appear after half an hour or so. Ashi swallowed a double take when she saw the famous Jedi herself, caged up near the announcer's table, wearing a leather bikini and a vacant expression, if not much else.

To the protests of a couple Beks, Ashi walked up to the cage, waving a hopeful hand in front of Bastila's face, but the Jedi didn't respond. A Vulkar guard informed her, sharply, that the Jedi could neither see nor hear her.

Ashi sighed; but, then again, help from a Jedi was probably too much to ask. She would have to deal with this on her own.

She had hardly finished the thought when her name, with all the finality of gunfire, cut through the air. Her head snapped around, in time for her to see a Bek repeat, "Ashi, your race!" He tossed her the helmet, and she slipped it on as she hurried over to the swoop. Worry returned, crashing over her like a tidal wave; her stomach churned with apprehension as she triple-checked the controls again and tuned out the mechanic's unhelpful final briefing, which seemed to consist mainly of 'don't die'. The grim thought, _now or never_, slipped through her mind before she could help it.

"Now, riding for the Hidden Beks, is Ashi Lucas!" roared the announcer into a microphone, and his voice echoed through the course, prompting a roar of excitement from the crowd. It didn't matter they'd never heard her name: swoop racing was prime entertainment, and if they got to see a rookie paint themselves across the track, so much the better.

In a stand high above, Mission jumped, and nudged Carth and Zaalbar. "You guys! She's up!" she whispered unnecessarily, voice bubbling over with excitement.

They all squinted at the rider mounting her bike, ant-sized from their seats high above. ("You should have told us it'd fill up so fast," Carth had said when they arrived; Mission had shrugged and muttered something about high-and-mighty off-worlders.) "Do you think she's nervous?" Mission wondered out loud, as they watched Ashi pull on her goggles on a monitor, her face now officially hidden but for a grim, determined slash where her mouth usually was.

"Yeah, but I think she'd never say if she was," replied Carth, beginning to feel worried. Ashi might be a good pilot, but a swoop was a seat and a steering wheel fixed on an engine—not to mention that one rider had already been, quite literally, smeared across the track. The crowd had gone wild. He had not.

"Three… two… one… _GO_!" roared the announcer, and Ashi took off. The bike handled well, and wind roared in her ears as she sped along the track, dodging from speed pad to speed pad. The crowd gasped appropriately as she flew past, and her friends watched nervously from above. Zaalbar was moaning quietly with worry, feeling the responsibility of his new lifedebt; Mission was biting her lip; Carth was staring and hardly even blinking, muttering instructions under his breath as if Ashi could hear him.

After what felt like an eternity to her friends, she sped across the finish line and pulled to a sharp stop. As they took in her time, approximately a quarter of a second faster than the previous high, the crowd burst into cheers. Mission squealed enthusiastically as Ashi hopped off the swoop bike, pulling off her helmet and shaking her hair out. The simple motion set the crowd off again—if deprived of blood, they could at least appreciate pure, competitive theatrics.

She quickly moved off the track and back to the racers' stand, where a thrilled Bek mechanic greeted her. "That was incredible!" she exploded. "You just beat racers who've been at this for years!" Even the Bek swoop jocks, though slightly disappointed at being bested, were impressed, and congratulated a grinning Ashi.

Then, as the crowd roared particularly loudly, a couple Beks glanced up at the postings, and their faces slipped slightly. Worry curling in her stomach, Ashi looked back in time to see a Vulkar name replace her own in the top slot. "Redros?" she asked, turning to a Twi'leki racer. "Who's he?"

She made a disgusted noise in the back of her throat. /Scum of the galaxy, that's who. Don't ask me/ she added, glancing to the entrance, /you can meet him right now./ She gestured to Redros, who entered through the door to the racers' stand, waving a fist in triumph and demanding high-fives from all the Vulkar racers. Then, noticing Ashi, he stopped, a smirk appearing on his face.

"Hey, sweetheart," he said smugly, sizing her up with clear amusement. "Disappointed that your time couldn't stand up? Don't be sad. Hey," he added with a grin, "if you want, I can cheer you up…" He reached out a hand, sliding it around her waist.

In the stands, Mission's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock; she snatched the binoculars instantly from Carth's hands, pressing them furiously to her face. Carth's fists clenched, and Zaalbar barked protectively, drawing the eyes of several Lower City residents not familiar with Mission Vao and her usual company.

As it was, though, Ashi didn't need protecting. "Get your filthy hands off me!" she spat, jerking away and glaring fiercely at the Vulkar. Unable to resist, she crossed her arms, adding, "Who are you, anyway? Brejik's bitch?"

Redros gritted his teeth at the insult, but shook it off quickly, barking out a laugh. "Fiery, huh? Very funny, girl… and you don't race badly, either."

The scowl didn't leave Ashi's face, as she wondered where he was going with the compliments. "I'm a multitalented person," she snapped back, looking pointedly at her vibroblade and wondering if he could pick up a hint.

Evidently not, she decided, because Redros leered back. "Multitalented? Well, you've got a quick tongue… I wonder what else that mouth of yours is good at…"

He let his voice trail off suggestively, as the Vulkars behind him broke into laughter. Ashi blinked, and her mouth dropped open in outrage. Her watching friends did a collective wince as she spun on her heel and headed to the announcer's desk, her fists clenched and jaw gritted in fury. Carth recognized the look on her face; it was one that had been directed at him too often, before she went off and did something drastic like becoming a cantina dancer or a duelist.

Mission had not seen the look on Ashi's face before, but she knew the general expression. It was the look on the faces of Hidden Beks right before they started drew their blasters and lunged at Vulkars, starting a street fight. "She's going to do something stupid, isn't she?" she whispered worriedly to Carth, whose face was apprehensive. One glance at him told her exactly what she hadn't wanted to hear.

Slowly, he nodded. "I think s—"

"Next up," roared the announcer, cutting him off easily, "racing again for the Hidden Beks, is Ashi Lucas!" The camera zoomed on Ashi's face as she entered the track. It was no longer just determined. She had an extremely worrying 'do or die' expression on, and Mission gulped.

"Don't do anything too bad, Ash," she mumbled.

Ashi mounted the bike, again pulling on her goggles and revving the engine, trying not to think about the Bek mechanic's warning—that the bike could only take so much heat before it blew. The announcer counted down, and as soon as he shouted, "Go!", she was off.

The entire crowd was glued to the monitors as Ashi flew across the track. She was racing much harder than she had done before: the small part of her mind not utterly focused on controlling the swoop realized that the nervous part of her was gone. She wasn't worrying about crashing anymore; all that mattered was hitting the next speed pad. No, scratch that—all that mattered was winning.

She felt the world blurring around her as she pressed the swoop to its limits, and subconsciously noticed that the seat was growing uncomfortably hot as the engine began to overheat. Nonetheless, she forced the speed, tuning out the enthralled crowd that was watching her become a blur in their vision, almost ridiculously fast.

A Mandalorian in the crowd, tall with graying hair and scars that he wore as proudly as victory medals, watched the racer with something that, below the miles of apathy, might possibly have resembled interest. She was fast, he decided, and doubtless the person he'd met in the Undercity, and frankly, even if she wasn't insane, she could have fooled him.

She was exactly what he was looking for.

Meanwhile, Carth and Zaalbar watched, too stunned to even comment on how stupid she was being. Mission, who had previously been hiding her head in her hands, peeked cautiously through her fingers.

"She's…she's not crashing," she said, amazement clear in her voice, vaguely resolving to have more faith in Ashi in future.

Carth found his voice. "I've seen this before, with fleet pilots who've gone past reason. They fly like this, not even trying to dodge Sith, just trying to take as many down with them as they can."

Mission looked horrified as his words sunk in. "You mean, she's, like… suicidal?"

He shook his head. "No, just past caring about whether or not she's taking a huge risk. She's not thinking anymore, she's just… going."

Mission nodded slowly. "Well, it's pretty damn impressive," she proclaimed. A couple moments later, it occurred to Carth that she shouldn't be swearing, but he thought of it too late to reprimand her. Just as the words were out of her mouth, Ashi flew across the finish line, the engine now growling loudly in protest. Rational thought kicked in sharply, and she realized with a jolt, as the bike lurched, that the engine had been pushed too hard.

"Jump!" yelled a Bek mechanic, racing from the sidelines toward her.

Ashi immediately flung herself off the bike, rolling as she hit the ground. Behind her, the swoop veered, and, slamming into a wall, exploded. Shrapnel flew across the course, and Ashi held a hand to shield her face against the blast. The bike fell to the ground in a gently flaming heap of metal.

The swoop arena was noiseless, a probable first for Lower City Taris. There was complete and utter silence as every eye watched the daring young swoop racer get up and cockily dust herself off. She pulled off her helmet, shaking out her hair with an easygoing nonchalance, and then turned to the monitor, where her time was just beginning to flash.

16.38 seconds.

Four seconds better than her previous time.

Three and a half seconds better than Redros.

0.27 seconds better than the current record.

The silence held a moment longer, and then the stadium erupted into wild applause. A slow smile spread over Ashi's face as her time sunk in, and the crowd watched her lips form the word 'yes!' as she punched the air in victory. Up from her viewpoint in the stands, Mission leapt to her feet, shouting ecstatically. Carth, speechless, allowed a stunned grin to appear on his face. Zaalbar simply appeared relieved that Ashi had survived, relaxing and barking a couple cheers after it occurred to him.

The Bek mechanic mirrored the general euphoria, racing over to her with a huge grin on her face. "That was amazing!" she gushed. "Did you see that time? No one's going to beat that—nobody!" She shook her head in amazement. "You can't be a rookie. No rookie races like that."

Ashi shrugged modestly. "I'm a good pilot."

It was an obvious deflection, but the mechanic didn't seem to care, unable to wipe the grin off her face. "The Vulkars must be gonna bow out now; no one's gonna beat that time." Her expression was casual, but her voice full of respect and still some disbelief.

Ashi grinned in spite of herself. "Ought to wipe that smirk off Redros' face, then, I think."

The mechanic smiled. "Are you joking? He thought he'd got this one in the bag. He must be livid."

The mechanic was right on both counts. When she and Ashi reentered the racers' stand, the Beks were celebrating, and the Vulkars were sulking furiously. Ashi swaggered past Redros, smugness seeping leisurely into her face as she watched his go from irritated to furious.

"Multitalented, Redros," she declared with a smirk.

He lunged suddenly forward at her, and she dodged back easily. Beks' head turned, some reaching for blasters, and a couple of the Vulkars leapt forward and grabbed Redros, who was snarling obscenities at Ashi. She shook her head, a satisfied grin still on her face.

"Getting the last word," she told him, unable to resist. "That's something else my mouth's good at, Redros."

The Beks all rushed to congratulate her as she approached. /The Vulkars are going to drop out/ exulted the Twi'lek who Ashi had spoken to earlier as they both took seats on the bench. /They know no one's going to beat you. This is amazing!/ She looked like she was about to continue, but was distracted as the announcer tapped the mic.

"Ladies and gentlemen, citizens of Taris," he exclaimed, "allow me to present you with this year's swoop champion, Ashi Lucas, a Hidden Bek rider!" The cameras trained in on Ashi's face: she glanced around in surprise, but recovered quickly, smiling and waving to the crowds. The stands echoed with cheers, and her smile widened, less nervous and more satisfied. "The leader of the Black Vulkars, Brejik, will now present you with the prize!" he continued.

But the instant Brejik seized the mic, the excitement drained instantly out of Ashi's face. "Ladies and gentlemen," he snapped, "there is something you must know before you acknowledge this rider as your champion. The truth is, the winning rider"—he broke off to gesture at Ashi—"cheated!"

Ashi jumped to her feet, expression outraged. "You're a fracking liar, Brejik!" she shouted, loud enough for her voice to carry to the nearby crowds. The Hidden Beks roared their agreement from behind her.

"No!" shouted Brejik angrily, holding up his hands in an attempt to regain the attentive silence. "The truth is, this rider was using an illegally modified swoop, with a prototype accelerator. This is cheating, and the Black Vulkars, recognizing it as such, are withdrawing their prize!"

"What?" demanded the announcer angrily. "Brejik, you can't do that! No gang can withdraw a prize after the races, it goes against all our traditions!"

Brejik stared at him, a sneer contorting his face. "You idiot," he hissed. "I am the wave of the future! Your traditions are nothing to me! I am personally withdrawing this Jedi as a prize, and selling her to the Sith if I want to, and there isn't a fracking thing you can do about it!"

"I might have something to say about that, Brejik!" interrupted an accented voice.

As everyone turned in shock to face the caged Jedi, she forced the door open with a wave of her hand and shoved the Vulkar guard to the ground. She reached out with her hand, and his vibroblade flew to her; snatching it from midair, she struck a fighting stance, and Ashi rolled her eyes. _Overkill_.

Some of the others were more impressed, though. "What?" stuttered Brejik, blinking as if he couldn't believe his eyes. "You had a neural restraint collar on! How could you possibly free yourself?"

_Um, I think her Jedi-ness might have something to do with it_, thought Ashi, and Bastila voiced her thoughts. "You underestimate the strength of a Jedi's mind, Brejik," she replied, "a mistake you won't live to regret!"

_Uh oh_, Ashi realized, eyes widening, as the gang leader's face contorted in rage. "Vulkars!" he roared. "To me! Kill them! Kill them all!" Drawing his blaster, he fired a few random shots into the crowd, and people screamed and began to scatter.

"There's our cue," muttered Carth, pulling out his blaster and running towards the racers' stand. Mission and Zaalbar followed, the girl drawing a blaster and the Wookiee a blade to join the fray. Ashi had her vibroblade out, and was slashing at Vulkars who seemed to be entirely focused on eliminating her; Bastila meanwhile ignited her lightsaber and began cutting down swarms of Vulkars. Unfortunately, however, even though there were more Beks than Vulkars, they were neither as combat-ready nor as vindictive, and were falling just as quickly. For a moment, it seemed evenly matched, but suddenly the Jedi managed to take out Brejik, at the same moment as Ashi ran her sword through Redros's chest. The tide turned in a moment, and finally the fray settled as the remaining gang members dispersed or died.

Pursing her lips irritably, Bastila turned to Ashi. "Maybe those bloody Vulkars will think twice next time before trying to keep a Jedi prisoner!" she snapped, dusting off her hands. "And as for you, if you think you can collect _me _as a prize…"

She broke off suddenly, and her face went pale for a moment. "Wait! I don't believe this! You're… you're one of the soldiers with the Republic fleet!"

Ashi rolled her eyes as Carth sucked in a breath, noticing Bastila's fatal mistake. "I'm _not_ a goddamn Republic soldier!" Ashi declared, throwing up her hands in exasperation. "I am a smuggler, who was blackmailed into joining the Republic, very, _very_ briefly. There's a _difference_."

Bastila looked less surprised than she might have at the explanation. "Well, regardless of your position. How did you end up racing for swoop gangs?"

Ashi grinned. "It's kind of a long story."

"Oh." Bastila nodded, cutting her off. "Well, we don't have time for it now. Do you have a plan to get off Taris yet?"

Ashi stared at her. "Excuse me? I think we were a little busy working on finding and rescuing _you_," she offered, impatience slowly but surely permeating her tone.

The Jedi glanced around, surprise coloring her face but melting quickly into scorn. "Is _that_ what you call this?" she wondered. "A rescue? Those Vulkars would have killed you without my help! In fact," she continued haughtily, "it's probably more accurate to say that I rescued you!"

Ashi glared at her. "You know what, brat? I think I can hold my own against a bunch of street punks, and the same goes for my friends here. We would have been fine, even without you, princess!"

Carth was beginning to understand what Ashi had been talking about when she mentioned Bastila before, but he stepped between the two girls before it could get too nasty—putting a hand on Ashi's arm, which was twitching towards her vibroblade. "All right, calm down," he instructed. "How about we call it a draw, and accept you fought off the Vulkars together?"

Bastila and Ashi both assumed sullen expressions, but muttered their agreement, accompanied by an eye roll in Ashi's case. Mission grinned mischievously as she sidled over. "Nice. Way to defuse the catfight, Carth," she chirped, earning her dirty looks from both women. Bastila cheered up considerably, though, when she realized exactly who she was talking to.

"Carth Onasi? You're alive? Finally, some good news!" she exclaimed. Ashi scowled. _I suppose that me being here is more like bad news, for her. _"Well, I'm sure that now I'm helping you all, we can figure out how to get off this planet before the Sith realize we're here."

The Jedi turned, mind churning, and headed for the exit, but was stopped by a sudden cry of shock from behind her. Spinning back around, she saw Ashi unconscious, being supported by Carth. "Is she hurt?" she immediately asked.

"I don't think so," he replied uncertainly. "She just… passed out."

Bastila nodded worriedly, chewing on her lip. "All right. Can you carry her? We should get going." Carth nodded and picked up Ashi, cradling her in his arms. Her head rested on his shoulder, her breath rapid and uneven. He spared her a single worried glance, before heading after Bastila.

* * *

_A group of Jedi, Bastila in the lead, was standing at the entrance of a room, and had just struck down a dark Jedi. He keeled over, and their attention turned to Ashi. She took them in calmly, although she couldn't see as well as usual, her vision obstructed by some kind of mask over her face._

_**They are fools.**_

_The thought was sudden and harsh, in a voice like hers but not quite her own, and followed by more like it. __**They honestly think that they can stand a chance**__, she thought with deep, vincictive amusement, and felt the corners of her mouth turn up in a smirk. She glanced down at her hand, gloved in black, as the lightsaber she held ignited, showing a blood-red beam of energy. Instinctively, she swung it in a complicated form, ending up in an offensive stance. __**Come on, Jedi,**__ she thought, beckoning the pathetic little group forward.__** Want to see what it's like to fight a real warrior?**_

_However, they never had a chance to find out, because the next moment, the world exploded._

_She was thrown forward as a huge blast of heat shoved her off her feet; pieces of shrapnel, more tangible fire than anything else, peppered her back and arms and legs. She fell to the ground, feeling, numbly, burns all over her back, and her stomach oozing blood from something she had impaled herself on. It was like the rancor explosion, the part of her that was Ashi thought, only bigger, and even more lethal._

_**I am going to die**__, she realized. And, to her horror, she felt no anger, no injustice. She simply felt betrayed. __**He fired on me. He killed me**__. The thought was painful, almost more so than the definite fatal injuries she'd just received. __**How could he?**__ she wondered miserably. She expected him to challenge her face to face, and they could duel it out like was meant to be… not this cruel stab in the back, a cowardly shot from afar. Damn it, she didn't _deserve_ to die like this!_

_Though the Jedi might possibly disagree._

_Then, through her fading consciousness, she sensed an approaching presence, with an aura so light it was near blinding. Bastila slowly, tentatively, reached out and touched her shoulder, turning her over just enough so that her face was visible. With trembling hands, the young Jedi reached out and lifted the mask from Ashi's face. Her lips parted, a tiny gasp slipping out. __**Maybe it's my eyes,**__ Ashi thought wryly._

_With tremendous effort, she looked into the icy blue eyes of the younger girl, and tried to speak, but her lips would only twitch, a faint hiss of air wheezing from her lungs like air from an accordion. __**Leave the Jedi to interpret that how they would**__, she thought, with faint and fading cynicism. __**What were Revan's last words…?**_

_What was Revan's last thought?_

_**I...  
**_

_**But I don't want to die…**_

_And then the darkness swept across her mind, a cloud drawing mercilessly over the sun, and she cried **wait...** as if it would listen, but then_—

But then it was just black.

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**Revan flashbacks are so cool to write. Gotta love it.**

**Quote from the next part (in which they escape Taris and begin to head for hell):  
Ashi: You know, Bastila, they have a word for self-proclaimed leaders, now. They call them dictators.**

**as always, read, review, compliment, comment, criticize... whatever. it's all good... and it all helps me update faster…**


	6. Crescendo

**first off, thanks for all the reviews. always great to get feedback from people, and there's nothing that helps me write better (not even coffee).****  
second: taris _is_ finished. but my chapter felt ludicrously long, so it's now in 2 smaller parts (this being one of them). the other one will be up in a couple days.  
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**disclaimer: _(yes, i suck about these. dont hold it against me)_ i don't own anything. except Ashi's personality (sometimes)  
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**Crescendo: to increase in intensity or force**

Ashi felt an annoying sense of disoriented déjà vu as she came to in the cot in the apartment. Swallowing, she slowly rolled out of bed and stood up. Mission, who had been examining her pazaak deck, saw her, and called out, "Hey, Ashi's awake!"

"Have I been out long?" Ashi asked nervously.

Mission shrugged. "About an hour, I think. You kind of collapsed after the big fight and 'not rescuing'," here she paused and rolled her eyes, using her hands to form air quotes, "that Jedi."

Ashi grinned. "You don't like her either?"

The girl grimaced. "You kidding? I ask her one little question about whether she ever uses the Force for fun—you know, like tripping people and stuff—and she gives me a preachy little lecture about immaturity and then trips me!" Mission scowled and Ashi struggled not to laugh at the indignant look on the girl's face.

Luckily, or not so luckily, everyone else chose that moment to enter the room. "Hi, guys," said Ashi cheerfully.

Carth smiled, and Bastila nodded tartly in greeting. "Good, you're awake. Commander Onasi and I have been talking about ways to get off Taris. Now I'm back in charge of this mission, perhaps we can start to do things properly."

Ashi's mouth dropped open in offense, and she glared at the Jedi. "Sorry, brat? You're in charge? When did this happen?" She turned to everyone else, and added, "You guys better not have supported this."

They all shook their heads emphatically, while Bastila scowled. Ashi raised her eyebrows. "You know, Bastila, they have a word for self-proclaimed leaders now. They call them dictators."

Bastila's face went from annoyance to outrage, but Ashi continued. "Look, we can't get hung up on who's in charge, okay? We need to work together. You've been told about radical ideas like that by your masters, right?" she asked Bastila sarcastically.

The Jedi took a deep breath, but nodded. "Very well. I suppose that makes sense. You're… you're right."

Ashi grinned in amusement. "_Wow_. That sounded painful to admit." Leaving Bastila seething, she turned to the rest of the group. "I'm going to the cantina, any of you want to come?" To her surprise, Carth stepped forward.

"Sorry," he explained, "but I do remember the last time you went to the cantina on your own."

Ashi shrugged resignedly. "All right, flyboy, let's go," she agreed. "Mission, you can go fool around, but take Z with you. Vice versa for you, Zaalbar." The two of them nodded. "Bastila… eh, you're too easily recognizable. You better stay here," she said with a smirk. Ignoring the Jedi's annoyed look, she turned and walked out the door, closely followed by Carth.

They had hardly left the apartment, however, when a green Twi'lek came racing up to them. "You…" he said to Ashi, panting from running, "you are the rider who won the swoop championship?"

Ashi nodded. "But I don't do autographs, sorry." She turned and began to walk towards the exit to the Upper City.

"Wait!" The man chased after her, and she stopped again, raising her eyebrows. He took a couple deep breaths, and then spoke. "I have a message from Canderous Ordo. He wants to meet you in the Lower City cantina."

Ashi, who had previously been paying little notice to the man, stopped and turned to face him. "Canderous? The Mandalorian that works for Davik? What's he want?"

The Twi'lek shrugged. "I don't know, sorry. I'm just a runner. However, I would advise you not to keep him waiting long. Mandalorians are known for many things, but patience is not one of them." He nodded pointedly, and then turned and walked away. Ashi, looking a little puzzled, glanced over at Carth.

"He's right," she said. "We should probably go meet up with Canderous right away."

Carth stared at her incredulously. "You're going to go meet a Mandalorian in the cantina? Are you crazy? Who knows what he wants?"

Ashi gave him a sharp look. "To _talk_, I assume. If you don't want to come, you can stay here, flyboy. It probably won't help me and Canderous's rapport if you're giving him dirty looks over my shoulder the whole time. And I know that's what you'll do, if I take you."

He frowned. "No I won't, I'm just saying! This guy is dangerous, beautiful."

She grinned impishly. "Don't worry, flyboy. I'm pretty dangerous too." Then she pointed back the way they had come and instructed firmly, "Now, go back to the apartment."

"What?" Carth started to object, but she glared ferociously at him. "You're incredibly good at holding grudges, flyboy. I don't actually think you should come. Go; stay there. Have fun with your precious Jedi," she added. She turned to leave, but then remembered something and smiled over her shoulder at him. "I get to say I told you so, don't I?" Then, before Carth could respond, she was gone.

When he reentered the apartment with an expression like thunder on his face, Mission immediately knew something was up. "Oh, no," she exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "What did she do?"

Carth scowled. "Some runner came up to us and told her a merc called Canderous Ordo wanted to meet her in the cantina. She decided to go alone, because she thought I couldn't 'be polite'," he snapped.

Mission bit her lip in worry, her eyes widening. "_The_ Canderous? The Mandalorian who works for Davik, and you're just letting her go?" she demanded.

Carth turned, already grabbing his blaster. "Hell no," he replied firmly. "I'm going after her." He turned and headed for the exit, but Mission leapt to her feet, racing after him and grabbing his arm.

"I'm coming too," she insisted.

Carth almost objected, but the Twi'lek girl had such a stubborn expression on that he sighed and nodded. "All right. Lower City cantina, but we need to get past the elevator guard, and Ashi has the security papers."

A wicked grin appeared on Mission's face. "Silly Carth," she said with a smile, "you don't think that's the only way to the Lower City?"

* * *

Ashi entered the cantina, and immediately walked into something resembling a brick wall. She stepped back, and looked up at him: tall and muscular, with graying hair and a scarred face; the same person she'd seen in the Undercity, although now he was missing the useless posse. "Canderous, right?" she asked.

He nodded. "And you're that crazy racer who won the swoop race," he said, his voice deep and gravelly.

"I have a name," Ashi offered.

The Mandalorian laughed. "I'm sure you do, sweetheart. But it's your rep I'm interested in. You see, you're the kind of person I've been looking for. I have a very interesting offer for you, and I think if you hear it out, you'll find it irresistible."

Ashi nodded, her curiosity awakened. "I'm listening," she said.

He grinned, and beckoned her over to an empty table. "Smart girl. Now here's the thing—I work for Davik, right? But lately, it's been getting pretty boring, so I figure it's time to get off this rock and find something better to do." He paused. "Here's where you come in."

"And I assume that my job has something to do with the Sith blockade you'd need to get past?" she guessed. Canderous nodded.

"Yeah. See, I saw you in the swoop race, and I figured anyone who was crazy enough to race like that, and can fight like that, is crazy enough to break into the Sith military base and steal the launch codes."

Ashi laughed. "I'm only crazy when it benefits me, Ordo. What's in it for me?"

He grinned, motioning her closer, and she leant across the table. "You want to know what I can do for you? I work for Davik, don't I? If you get me those launch codes, I can get you a ship. Specifically, Davik's ship. The Ebon Hawk." He saw Ashi's stunned face, and added, with a smirk, "Maybe you've heard of it?"

"Heard of it?" Ashi's echoed in amazement. "That ship's a fracking _legend_! Fastest hyperdrive in the galaxy, flies like hell, can outrun anything that's stupid enough to chase it and outshoot anything that's stupid enough to attack it..." She sighed, a faraway expression in her eyes. "People kill for the Hawk. Damn, I've always wanted a ship like that one." Then she straightened up, focused again. "Okay, Ordo. How exactly do you plan to get me my ship?"

He grinned at her possessive '_my'_, but shook his head. "Uh, uh, uh. First you get me the codes. Then I tell you the rest of the plan." He raised his eyebrows. "Interested?"

Ashi nodded with a smile, but then something seemed to occur to her. "How do I get in?"

Canderous smiled. "You mean the security system? No problem. Davik's having a top-of-the-line astrotech droid being custom-built. It'll get you in. Go to Janice Nall's store; tell her Canderous sent you. She'll sell it to you."

Ashi nodded again, but then her eyes narrowed. "I'm trusting you, Ordo. You better keep up your end of the deal."

He nodded. "Be back when you have the codes, Lucas. Then we'll talk."

The girl smiled. It held just the slightest hint of a threat. "We better," she said. Then, sudden noise over at an out-of-the-way table caught her attention, and she sighed as she heard familiar voices. "I have to go. I'll be back with the codes." She turned away, rolling her eyes as she heard an argument beginning.

"…but the Lower City is no place for a kid!" said Carth.

Mission scowled. "Kid? Is that some kind of crack about my age?" she demanded. "Because you're not so young yourself!"

Ashi stopped several feet away, surveying the scene with interest. "_Ouch_, kid," she muttered under her breath. "Take that, flyboy." They didn't notice her.

"Don't you snap at me, missy!" Carth exclaimed, causing Ashi to almost choke from stifling her laughter. "You want a lecture? How's this… only bratty little _children_ fly off the handle because of a simple comment!"

Ashi bit her lip and struggled to hold in her laughter, because frankly, this was too good to miss.

Mission flushed with anger, going light purple. "You know what? I don't need to take this from you! You're not my father… although you're sure old enough to be! So keep your lectures in your withered old head, because I don't need them!" she snapped, crossing her arms and childishly avoiding looking at Carth.

"And I sure as hell don't need this," he replied angrily. "Let's just…"

"Keep spying on me?" Ashi finished brightly, appearing next to the table with a grin. Both her friends jumped, and then began to object. She cut them off.

"Hey kid, flyboy. Stalking me, much?" she asked, her voice cheerful but with an undertone of annoyance.

"Well, _you_ were going off to meet that Mandalorian on your own!" replied Carth, ignoring the question.

Ashi shook her head. "Exhibit A, flyboy. Him being a Mandalorian is totally irrelevant to everyone but you, ergo, I couldn't take you with me. And if you guys plan to be spies, maybe work on not biting each others' heads off while you're supposed to be following me," she suggested sarcastically. Carth and Mission both looked sheepish.

"Look," continued Ashi, "I can take care of myself. I don't need you both following me everywhere because some of you think I'm totally helpless," here she glared pointedly at Carth, "or because some of you can't keep your nose out of anything," she added, frowning at Mission. "Kid, go home. Z's probably freaking out. I'm going to the droid shop."

She finished firmly, and then spun on her heel and left the cantina without a second look at either of them.

Mission grimaced. "I think she's mad," she muttered wryly, before getting up and leaving the cantina. Carth got to his feet too, but followed Ashi, catching up with her near the elevator.

"What?" she snapped as he ducked in after her, catching the door with his hand to stop it from closing. She averted her gaze, purposely not looking at him, and he sighed.

"Look, beautiful, I'm sorry…" he began.

"Shove it," she replied, still not looking at him.

He would have laughed if she had been talking to someone else, but this didn't feel funny at all. "Ashi, I'm sorry. We don't think you're helpless. No one does. But…" he hesitated, unsure how to phrase the next part. "There's a difference between thinking someone needs help and wanting... to help the person so nothing happens to them, no matter how independent they are." He grabbed her wrist in one hand, and she stared up at him defiantly, daring him to continue.

"Just because you don't need help, doesn't mean that… we don't want to help you," he murmured slowly.

She inwardly sighed, a small part of her moaning in disappointment. _We_. He wasn't speaking about himself, then; he was just reassuring her on the behalf of the group. Somehow, just that little word—we—seemed to hurt.

"Yeah, well, you know what? I'd be even more grateful, Republic, if you'd let me deal with stuff on my own." As she finished the sentence, the elevator reached the Upper City, and, inwardly appreciating the perfect timing, she stormed out and away from him.

Carth looked after her. _What did I say?_ he wondered. It felt like all he could do was offend her. She wasn't helpless; he knew that... but she couldn't be so independent that she didn't need anyone? Still, Ashi was already annoyed with him and he knew he had upset her. He decided to go home; following her would only make angrier.

Meanwhile, Ashi managed to buy the droid, and headed back to the apartment, where everyone was busy looking either bored or annoyed. "Bastila, Z, come on," she said, startling the two, as Mission rushed forward to admire the new droid. "We have a Sith base to break into."

Bastila's eyes widened, and she began to open her infamous mouth, probably to demand _why_ and _how_ and _what happened with the Mandalorian_, when Ashi interrupted, "Canderous—he's the merc I met at the cantina—can get us a ship, if we get him the Taris launch codes."

Bastila didn't look completely satisfied, but she did close her mouth, which Ashi found to be a great improvement. Picking up her lightsaber, the Jedi followed Ashi, Zaalbar, and T3 out of the room, and the door slammed shut behind them. Ashi did not look at Mission or Carth.

"She's still mad at us, huh?" asked the Twi'leki girl, turning to Carth, before she remembered that she was supposed to be mad at him. "Geezer," she added quickly.

He rolled his eyes at the name, but nodded. "Yeah. She got pretty mad at me in the elevator, kid. Apparently, she feels like we're treating like she's helpless."

Mission's eyes widened. "What? We don't think that! What did you say, you idiot?"

Carth sighed, actually looking as old as Mission thought he acted for a moment. "I don't think it matters. I can't say anything right," he said tiredly, sitting down heavily and shaking his head. Mission couldn't help a grin.

"Ooh. You've got it _bad_, geezer," she said playfully.

Carth's head snapped up, and he stared at the Twi'lek. "Excuse me?" he demanded, a stunned expression on his face, even as he flushed slightly. "What did you say?"

Mission giggled, covering her mouth, as her head-tails curled in amusement. "You heard me, old man."

"I don't have _anything_ for Ashi," he exclaimed immediately.

"Hmm," grinned Mission, tapping her chin. "That sounded pretty defensive."

Carth's sudden look of fury, however, silenced her. A pained expression filled his face, as memories came flooding back. He remembered, all too clearly, the last time he had felt like that about someone. "Look, kid, this is none of your business," he snapped, getting up and storming away.

Mission stood stunned, and bit her lip, unsure how she had offended him. Carth was more easily provoked than that rancor Ashi had blown up. "Talk about touchy," she muttered, as the door slammed behind him.

* * *

Breaking into the Sith base was a breeze... save a robot guarding the governor's office which managed to sink a couple nasty shots into Zaalbar; shortly after T3 disrupted the shield and Ashi demolished it. The droid body fell to the ground, smoking and emitting sparks. Ashi hurried over to the Wookiee, who was unconscious.

Bastila, who Ashi reluctantly admitted was finally being useful, began to heal him. However, when she told Ashi that it would take about fifteen minutes to heal the wounds completely, Ashi instructed T3 to unlock the elevator, and then proceeded down on her own. She stepped off of it into a small, bare room, and found herself facing a bald man in dark robes. He jumped as she came in, which Ashi found somewhat unprofessional.

"Who dares disrupt my meditation?" he demanded, his face furious, as he drew a red lightsaber.

"Ashi Lucas, nice to meet you," replied Ashi brightly, but her actions contradicted her tone as she drew her vibroblade in response.

He frowned, and stared hard at her. "Interesting…it would appear that you have some degree of Force sensitivity. Who would have thought a Force adept would be found on this pathetic planet?"

The words surprised Ashi. "What? Hate to break it to you, Sith, but I'm no Jedi. I'm just that good with a vibroblade."

He shook his head indifferently. "It matters not. Either way, I will crush you. Feel the wrath of the dark side!" He lifted a hand, and sparks danced in his fingers for a moment, before lightning struck Ashi and threw her against the wall. She yelled in pain for a second, but then gritted her teeth, and glared at the Sith.

"You want wrath? How's this?" she snapped, leaping to her feet and rushing the Dark Jedi. He looked surprised by her quick recovery, and only just managed to parry her furious flurry of attacks.

"Good, very good!" he gloated. "Feel the power, let it flow through you! Use your anger!" He launched into a furious counterattack, and Ashi cried out as the lightsaber cut into her arm, burning as it made contact with her skin. She sucked in a deep breath, and then, with almost inhuman speed, attacked the Sith again.

He looked worried, now, as she slashed furiously over and over. Finally, with a powerful stroke of her blade, she forced his lightsaber out of his hand, and ran her vibroblade through his throat. He collapsed to the ground with an unpleasant gurgle.

Ashi headed to the desk behind him, and quickly located the launch codes, downloading them onto a computer chip. Satisfied, she left the room, although she stopped to pick up the dark Jedi's lightsaber.

It was very funny to see Bastila's face as Ashi exited the elevator, carrying a red lightsaber. She immediately regretted it, however, when the brat saw fit to give her a long, painful lecture on how she was, first, not a Jedi, and therefore unqualified to even carry a lightsaber—here, Ashi interrupted she was more qualified than the dead Sith at the other end of the elevator—and second, how red was stereotypically a color of evil.

Ashi didn't help her case with her occasional interjections, including that it did match her flight jacket. Bastila swelled with rage at that, prompting Ashi to add, "Oh, relax. Or does a sense of humor lead to the dark side, too?" This didn't really improve the situation, and Bastila fumed silently all the way back to the apartment.

* * *

The next day, Canderous was waiting when she arrived in the cantina, and looking gruffly pleased. "Not bad, Lucas," he commented, as she sat down. "Now." His face was immediately all business. "I know the Sith base had a break-in. I know you have these launch codes." He smiled, showing a mouthful of crooked teeth. "Guess it's time I explain my part of the plan, huh?"

Ashi nodded. "You better, Ordo. How're you going to get me the Hawk?"

"Well, Lucas, you've gotten yourself quite the rep during your time here," said Canderous, leaning back in his chair with a smile. "And Davik's always interested in recruiting new talent. With swoop and dueling champ on your résumé, not to mention a recommendation from me, he'd love to invite you up to his estate to see if you're interested in working for the Exchange. While we're there, we steal the Ebon Hawk, punch in the launch codes, and blow this planet." He finished with a grin on his face. "Good?"

Ashi's face was impassive, but her eyes sparked with interest. "My friends?"

"We'll pick them up. They can come too. Now, Lucas. You in?"

Ashi grinned, and nodded eagerly. "When can you set this up with Davik?" she asked.

Canderous smiled. "Already have. I figured you'd realize you couldn't say no, so I arranged this for tomorrow. Cancel any plans you have," he added, "Davik doesn't like being kept waiting."

"Nice," said Ashi appreciatively. "You're smart, Ordo, I'm going to enjoy working with you. Okay, so I'll meet you tomorrow at noon, here?" she verified. The Mandalorian nodded, and she grinned in approval.

"Don't be late," he called, as she headed out of the cantina, a satisfied smile still on her face.

* * *

High above the planet, a huge sliver ship drifted through space. On the bridge, a nervous-looking admiral was speaking to a man in a red bodysuit with a synthetic jaw. The admiral's eyes were fixed on the Dark Lord with nervous respect and fear, but Malak's gaze flickered sharply across the planet in front of him with frustration. He was looking for something.

"The search for Bastila is taking too long," growled Malak, in his characteristic gravelly voice, cutting Saul's report off entirely. "Admiral Karath, I want you to bomb the entire planet."

The admiral's eyes widened in shock, and he immediately objected, a nasty sense of déjà vu coming to mind, along with the word 'Telos'.

"My lord, are you sure? There are countless civilians on the planet, along with our own men still on the surface." He realized, as he spoke, however, that objecting had been a mistake, and his protest grew more and more halfhearted as he continued.

Malak turned to the unfortunate man, his dark cape swishing and his gray eyes flashing dangerously. "Your predecessor made the mistake of questioning my orders, Admiral. Surely you are not foolish enough to make the same mistake."

His voice was a monotone, as always, but his narrowed eyes were full of cruelty and intimidation. Admiral Karath was reminded, guiltily, of how differente this Dark Lord was, and how he had preferred Revan: her subtlety, her intricacy, her undeniable brilliance.

But Malak was the Sith Lord now, and there would be no questioning his orders while it remained so. "Yes, my lord Malak. But... it will take several hours to position our fleet."

Malak nodded impatiently. "Then you had better get started. Dismissed, Admiral," he said, waving Saul away with a hand. He turned, then, and resumed staring at the unfortunate blue-green planet.

"I know you are there, Bastila," he muttered with a malicious grin. "Let's see if your Battle Meditation can save you now."

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**as always, ****r&r--comments, criticism, compliments... it's all good. even criticism (mostly)  
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**and a quote from the final taris chapter (!):  
Canderous: actually, i think anything she does would go down well, dressed like that.  
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	7. Escape

**and here's the other part. taris is officially finished_--yes!_ although really, i doubt there's anyone who didn't feel incredibly satisfied after finished taris for the first time. next up is their time on planet jedi...**

**disclaimer: it's bioware's, not mine (oh well)  
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**Escape: to avoid danger, harm, or other unpleasant situations (A/N: like the destruction of planets...)  
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Davik's estate was lavish, and, in Ashi's opinion, slightly over-the-top. The throne room, for instance, made her wonder how such a big ego could possibly fit in a single person. However, she was charming to the old man, with a slight edge that made her dangerous enough to be interesting. Canderous was grudgingly impressed by her performance. Carth didn't like the whole thing, probably because it was Canderous's idea, but since he was posing as a bodyguard, his usual edgy temperament at least made sense.

Davik gave them a tour of the estate, but the only part Ashi noted was the hangar. "Here she is," said the crime lord proudly, as he gestured to the ship. Ashi could only stare in wonderment, although Carth snorted something about 'not that great'—at that point she stepped pointedly on his foot. "My pride and joy, the Ebon Hawk. Fastest ship in the galaxy," Davik bragged, completely unaware. "Note the top-of-the-line security system. No one's stealing my baby. I am, of course, working on acquiring the launch codes, so it will not remain grounded as it currently it."

"Mm, that is a tragedy," agreed Ashi, still looking awestruck.

Davik nodded. "I'm glad you like it. Anyway, let us continue the tour."

Finally, tour complete, he led them to a set of extravagant rooms. "These will be your rooms during your stay here as my guests. Feel free to take advantage of the slave quarters down the hall for all your personal needs. However, if you are to leave the guest areas, my guards will be forced to deal with you... most harshly."

Ashi rolled her eyes. _Maybe work on your veiled threats, old man._

"I would be pleased if you would join me later on for dinner," Davik continued. "Until then." He lifted her hand to his lips, and kissed it gently, before turning and leaving.

Ashi waited until he was out the door, and then made a face and wiped her hand exaggeratedly. Canderous snickered, and Carth half-grinned, although he was starting to look typically protective. "Is he always like this?" Ashi asked, grimacing.

The Mandalorian smirked. "Well, only with the girls. And maybe Calo Nord, I'm not sure about him." Ashi laughed; she had already met the diminutive bounty hunter and was not very taken with him. As she had commented to Carth and Canderous, he had an uncanny resemblance to a mushroom.

"All right, seriously. How're we going to get the Ebon Hawk?" she asked Canderous. "You better have a brilliant idea under that thick skull of yours."

"Well, I don't know," Canderous shrugged. "You could always try to get on his good side at dinner…" He let his voice trail off, and raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Ashi winced, and replied even before Carth opened his mouth to object. "Ew!" she snapped with a shudder. "He's what, seventy? Thanks, Ordo, you dirty-minded little Hutt-slime. Out of the question."

"Not into older men, then?" offered Canderous innocently.

"In your dreams," she replied playfully. "Besides, I don't think it's so much me being into older guys, as he's into younger women."

Carth watched the exchange in amazement. He couldn't stand Mandalorians, after having fought so many in the war, but here was Ashi, joking with and teasing one. She would never cease to amaze him, he thought with a smile.

Canderous smirked. "You're actually older than most of his usual flings."

Ashi pulled a face. "That is wrong on _so_ many levels. But anyway, since I'm not really into the idea of being one of his flings, what's plan B?"

"How about," suggested the Mandalorian, "we wait until they're all asleep, shoot anything in our way, take the ship and fly?"

"But then I still have to go to dinner with him," Ashi objected.

Canderous grinned. "Well, of course. Can't have you missing that." She scowled him, but eventually had to concede, this being the only idea they had. They decided to sneak out after Ashi's dinner was over, and take the Hawk before anyone could catch them. As plans went, she didn't love it, but decided it would have to do for now.

They separated, Canderous going off to the slaves to 'get some information'—Carth didn't fail to add that that wasn't all he'd be getting—and Ashi decided to find an outfit for dinner, in about an hour. There were a number of formal dresses in the closet, and despite herself she enjoyed getting ready. Finally, about an hour later, she headed into the main room of their quarters, where Carth and Canderous were sitting in painful silence.

Both mens' mouths dropped open as she entered. She grinned, blushing. Canderous found his voice first. "All this, for a guy you're not interested in? Right." Ashi hit him lightly on the arm, and then gently reached out to Carth and lifted his chin, closing his mouth. He flushed, embarrassed, and Ashi laughed.

"Good, flyboy?" she asked, gesturing to her outfit.

He shook his head slowly. "Wow, beautiful," he murmured, accidentally still staring at her. She had on a black, strapless dress: flattering, but almost reminiscent of the armor she had worn as a duelist. Being Ashi, she still looked distinctly dangerous. It was good.

She grinned. "Yeah, I liked it. And hopefully Davik will, too, enough to let his guard down a little. Worth a try, right?"

Carth nodded slowly, but his face was concerned. "Be careful, though. Don't—"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "I'll be fine, _mom_." She smirked, but then added reluctantly, "I better go. I think it wouldn't go down to well if I was late." Turning, she headed out the door, and Carth watched her go, his face still stunned.

"Actually," said Canderous conversationally, gazing after her, "I think anything she does would go down well, dressed like that."

* * *

It did go well, as she informed Carth when she returned to their quarters. Canderous had his own rooms that he went back to, but the pilot stayed, interrogating Ashi about her dinner. She answered all his questions from her room, as she changed out of the dress, including the ones he didn't ask. To answer Carth's unspoken question, Davik had tried to flirt with her, but she'd brushed it off in a subtle kind of way.

"Bet he was disappointed," Carth commented dryly.

"Well, he'll live," replied Ashi tartly, joining him in the main room. "He can go spend the night with his slaves instead." Carth snickered at that, and Ashi grimaced. "Yeah, but I'm not joking."

Just then, the door opened, and Canderous stepped in, carrying a ludicrously large blaster. Ashi raised her eyebrows. "Nice gun," she muttered. "If you can lift it."

"It's Mandalorian," he replied brusquely. "Twice the firepower of anything you probably have."

She grinned. "It'll be useful, then. I have a feeling we're going to be running into some of the guards Davik mentioned." She walked over to a footlocker and took out her vibroblade, slipping it into a belt on her waist.

Canderous grinned. "We need some way to disable the security system before we can get to the hangar, but I think I know how. See, the previous pilot of the Hawk is being kept prisoner in one of the rooms. He knows how the system operates. We find him, and do him a favor, then we get a free pass to the ship."

"Nice," Ashi nodded. "Guess we'll go find him, huh?"

The man was not extremely hard to locate, given the screaming coming from the room he was in. Ashi managed to coax the security codes from him, before letting him make a run for it, and the three headed for the hangar. They were stopped, however, when a massive explosion sounded, coming from outside the building but not far away. The aftershock threw Ashi to the ground. "What in space was that?" she demanded, leaping back to her feet and staring around furiously.

Carth had a stony expression on his face. "It sounds," he said slowly, his voice layered with pain, "like the Sith are bombing the planet."

Ashi's face filled with horror. "We have to get the hell out of here!" she exclaimed, speeding up to a run towards the hangar. Carth and Canderous followed close behind. They arrived at the doors, and Ashi quickly typed in the override codes, shutting off the security system.

She raced into the room and then froze, as she saw the figures already near the ship. One was old, in pinkish armor. The other was small and mushroom-like. Neither looked very happy.

"Damn these Sith!" exclaimed Davik. "They're bringing the whole place down around our ears. We better…" He stopped as he caught sight of Ashi, Canderous, and Carth. "Well, well, well. Look what we have here: thieves in the hangar!" He glared ferociously at the three of them. "Thought you'd leave me high and dry, eh, while the Sith bomb the planet into space dust?" he demanded angrily.

Ashi shrugged. "Well, yeah. That was kind of the plan, actually."

Davik growled, and then turned to Calo. "Nord! Eliminate these double-crossers, and then we can get out of here!"

The mushroom grinned nastily. "With pleasure, Davik. I've been looking forward to this for a long time." He focused on Canderous immediately, and Ashi left the two to work it out, heading instead for Davik.

"Backstabbing schutta!" he snapped, as he dodged a slashing attack from her vibroblade.

She lashed out with a string of curses she'd picked up on the Outer Rim, and he pulled out his own sword, parrying her next attack. He was strong, for an old man, and Ashi struggled to defend herself from his furious assault. He almost got an advantage, but at that point Carth decided to jump in and help her out, firing a helpful shot that hit Davik in his sword arm. He cried in pain, and Ashi used the momentary advantage to run the blade through his neck—he dropped to the ground, blood pooling on the floor. Seeing his former employer fall, Calo Nord panicked.

"You may have me outnumbered and outgunned," he snapped, "but if I'm going down, I'm taking you all with me! This thermal detonator will blow us to bits!" He prepared to launch the grenade at his feet, but at that moment, an even larger explosion made the roof of the hangar cave in. Calo Nord screamed as a pile of rubble crushed him.

Ashi, meanwhile, was suddenly feeling dizzy. The bombs seemed even louder than before, and the cries of people echoed through her mind. She felt lightheaded as she heard Carth and Canderous's voices, as if from the end of a tunnel.

"Come on, get on the ship!" roared Canderous, racing to the Ebon Hawk, but Carth turned to look at Ashi, in time to see her stumble to the ground.

"Ashi!" he yelled, running over to her and helping her up. She was still conscious, but she moaned in pain.

"It hurts," she groaned, clutching at her head. Carth supported her gently, helping her onto the ship and into the medbay, before racing to the cockpit. Quickly and expertly, he started up the ship and flew out of the hangar, heading to pick up all the rest of their group.

Meanwhile, Ashi curled in a ball on the cot, her face agonized. She felt sick, and her head seemed to be, literally, full of pain…she could hear and sense a million screams, feel the heat and pain from the bombs. Death seemed to contaminate every breath she choked in, as she felt the collective agony of a million sentient beings being killed simultaneously. All around her, the sounds of destruction and the cries of the dying filled her mind. She screamed in anguish, and wrapped her arms around herself. It was too much pain... and worst of all, it all felt too familiar...

* * *

_...It attacked her out of nowhere. One moment she was gazing out over the softly undulating field of Dantooine, and the next she suddenly felt the wrenching disturbance in the Force. Helplessly, she cried out in pain. It was pure torture, feeling the deaths of so many innocents, and overpowering. Sudden tears poured down her face as a million terrified screams filled her mind._

_And then Alek's warm arms surrounded her from behind, and she spun, wrapping her arms around him and burying her head in his broad shoulder. "It's so terrible," she moaned. "So many are suffering, Alek..." She shook her head in misery, and his arms tightened protectively around her. "This is wrong; this shouldn't be happening. How can they just let this happen?" she demanded, the familiar feeling of righteous anger bubbling up inside her._

_"It's horrible, Red," he agreed, lifting a soothing hand to stroke her hair softly. "And those idiots on the Council, they're not even doing anything to stop it. The Mandalorian threat is only getting worse, the longer they don't respond."_

_"The Mandalorians want to provoke them into a war," she replied, pulling away slightly to look him in his eyes: deep, gray, and understanding. "It's what they live for. We need to confront them, rather than hiding and preaching goddamn patience!" Her voice rose as she spoke, until she was nearly shouting._

_"I know," Alek replied, smiling broadly at her as their plans, already in the making, came into play. "It's all right, love. We will. We know what we need to do. Besides, the Jedi have been wrong about many things before this," he added, a mischievous grin now on his face. "Love, for instance. Passion."_

_She smiled, in spite of herself, the memory of the pain already fading as well-known warmth filled her chest. "Yes, you're right," she agreed, lifting a hand to his face and stroking his cheek. "After all, we all know how wrong they were about that." Grinning, she stood up on her toes, and pressed her lips gently against his…

* * *

_

Malak gazed out over the planet, watching explosions ripple over its surface. It was only a tremor from here, but he could still taste the delicious feeling of all the people down below joining the Force. Nervously, his admiral approached. "Lord Malak," he said quietly, "the attacks are successful. Taris is offering no resistance. They are completely at our mercy."

Malak looked like he was grinning. "A shame for them that we have none. Resume the bombardment, Admiral. Wipe this pathetic planet from the face of the galaxy!" He waved a hand across his view of Taris, as if he could eradicate it that simply... which, to be fair, he pretty much could.

The admiral nodded, hiding his flicker of reluctance with a salute. "Very good, my Lord Malak. I shall do as you command."

"Excellent," said the Dark Lord, turning back to the window with a smile. Soon Bastila would be dead, and nothing more would stand in his way...

Saul couldn't help his own relief at the sudden simplicity as he started down the hall, but it was short-lived. "Admiral?" asked a nervous voice, with the grating edge of a Sith uniform, interrupting Saul's measured stride. He stiffened automatically. He _hated_ those uniforms, he thought, hated them for how they reminded him of her... how her voice had sounded, distorted, through that mask... how she had used to stand where Malak stood now, and seen the battle with a cold, calculating eye; she had always known exactly how to get her way...

"What?" Saul demanded sharply. The officer flinched.

"Sir, we've... we've got reports of a ship that broke the blockade. Model 34-P7JK. Called the Ebon Hawk. It's a smuggling ship, supposed to belong to Davik Kang." The officer gushed information anxiously, and Saul could see him darting around the real problem. That infuriated him.

"Supposed to?" he echoed flatly.

The officer swallowed. "Davik Kang is dead, Admiral Karath," he explained. "Auto-transmission to the Exchange bosses; we intercepted it."

Saul's jaw began to clench. Davik's ship was leaving, but Davik wasn't on it... he had a sneaking suspicion where this was going. "Did you send fighters after it?" he snapped impatiently.

"Well... yes, sir..." the Sith nodded, "but they shot them down and got the hyperdrive engaged. We can't possibly catch them now."

Saul took a deep breath, closing his eyes, and then nodded briskly. "Did you manage to get a lock on its route?"

This was obviously the worst part of all, because the officer had to look away from Saul's steely gaze, despite the mask that hid his face completely. "Yes, Admiral," he nodded. "It was... it was going to Dantooine."

And that was when Saul's suspicion was confirmed. A different man might have been angry, might have shouted at the officer or slammed a fist against the wall. Saul only nodded. If he had learned anything from Revan, it was to stay calm. One must never know if they have gained an advantage. Always act like you know exactly what you're doing... it had served her well, after all.

"Very well," he said slowly. "This is a complication, as I am sure you understand. Report to Lord Malak, I expect he will be interested to hear this."

The soldier gasped, and Saul couldn't blame him. The Dark Lord had a nasty habit of killing the bearers of bad new. "Go," said the admiral unconcernedly, waving a hand and hiding a smirk. This was the way to calm oneself down. "Report to Lord Malak immediately."

The officer paused, and then saluted resignedly and left. Saul watched him go, wondering briefly who he was, and how soon they would be able to replace him.

* * *

Ashi's eyes fluttered open, and she found a much less desirable image filling her vision than the blonde, gray-eyed man, featuring for the second time in a dream: Bastila, looking shocked and nervous. "Hey, brat," mumbled Ashi, scooting back and sitting up against the wall. "What's new?"

Bastila bit her lip nervously, and then said, "Commander Onasi informed me you passed out shortly after the Sith bombing began."

"Command… oh, right. Republic." Ashi frowned; it sounded very strange to hear Carth called by such a formal name. Sometimes it was surprisingly easy to forget he was actually important. "Uh, yeah, I think I did pass out. Which probably looks pretty bad, since that's the second time it's happened, and..."

Then, the latter part of the sentence sunk in. "Oh, space, the bombing. Is everyone okay?" she demanded frantically. "Mission and Z and T3, they got out too, right?"

The Jedi looked surprised, but hid it well. _Perhaps I was wrong about the Masters making a mistake. She seems to have retained a great deal of compassion_. "They're fine," she replied reassuringly. "They all got out safely."

Ashi sighed in relief. "Good. Poor Mission, though, she must be taking it really hard."

Bastila shrugged awkwardly. "Well, I suppose, but she will be fine."

"Yeah, she's tougher than she looks," agreed Ashi. "But I should still go talk to her at some point, make sure she's all right. After all," she grimaced, "it sucks to lose everything." Ashi was referring to the end of her smuggling career, but Bastila frowned; she was unsure as to where the other girl was drawing that experience from.

"Anyway," she said, "what exactly happened when you passed out?"

Ashi frowned. "I'm not sure. It was strange, but like… like all the death, I could _feel_ it. It was overwhelming…" She hesitated, and her voice trailed off. "That feeling, it's never happened before. But then I had another… well, a vision, I guess."

Bastila stiffened. "What of?" she asked, her voice strained.

Ashi paused. She didn't particularly want to tell the brat all about the blonde man who seemed to be in love with vision-her, whoever that was. "It was a similar feeling," she compromised, "I think during the Mandalorian Wars. This guy and I were talking about the war—oh, and I mentioned the feeling, I called it a… a disturbance in the Force?" She cocked her head quizzically. "Do you know what that means?"

Bastila brushed the question off. "What else?"

"Like I said, we were talking about the war… I was angry, I wanted to go fight but someone wouldn't let me. I think we were agreeing to go anyway…" Then her voice trailed off, and she smiled unexpectedly.

"What happened next?" prompted Bastila nervously.

Ashi smirked. "Oh, I don't know. It all gets a little hazy after we started kissing." She was satisfied to see the Jedi blush. "And then you woke me up, blessed as you are with awful timing." However, she was taken aback as Bastila went very pale. "Is something wrong? Or is kissing just more adult material than you're used to?"

Bastila couldn't muster a very sharp look; she was too worried. "Have you had many visions like this before?" _She's remembering_, the Jedi thought fearfully._ The Masters didn't use enough strength on her mind; she's too strong to have had this done halfway._

Ashi nodded slowly. "Yeah…three before this, I think," she replied, listing on her fingers. "One had that guy in it, that was after I half-blew myself up; the other two… well, actually, they had you in them." Bastila's edgy nod prompted her to keep talking. "You were fighting a dark Jedi. Revan, I think."

Shock filled the younger girl's face. "What were those visions like?"

"Weird," Ashi grimaced. "Because from the point of view I saw it in, it would have been me as Revan." She shrugged. Bastila smiled, but it seemed forced.

"How odd. But… I think I have an explanation. You did experience these after the fight at the swoop race?" she asked, inventing wildly. Ashi nodded uncertainly. "It is possible that after the fight, the aftereffects of my use of the Force allowed you to witness one of my more intense memories. But this is very odd, such things are usually a sign of Force sensitivity." _Better to tell her of her power now, than let her work it out later_, she decided.

Ashi's mouth dropped open, and her eyes sparked in excitement. "You mean I can use the Force?"

"Well," Bastila added quickly, "I am not totally sure what it may mean. The Force works in mysterious ways." Ashi rolled her eyes at the phrase, which seemed like an evasive way of saying Bastila didn't really know what she was talking about. "This would be better left for the Jedi council to speculate on upon our arrival." Ashi frowned.

"What? Arrival where?"

"We are currently on course to Dantooine. There is a Jedi enclave where we can find refuge," replied Bastila decisively. "There we can seek the advice of the Jedi Masters, as well as have some time to rest and recuperate, physically and spiritually."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Oh, good. I really need some spiritual recuperation," she muttered, but knew there was nothing to be gained from arguing with the brat. "Okay," she agreed reluctantly, getting to her feet. "Next stop, planet Jedi. Now, I'm going to go talk to Mission, see how she's doing." She got up and left to go find the Twi'lek.

Bastila sank down slowly onto the bed. _You may not need to go to Dantooine, but I do. Masters, help me. What am I to do if she remembers?_

She shook her head sharply, snapping herself out of it. _Relax. There is peace. She has not caught on yet; there is no reason why she should._ However, she was curious about what Revan's new identity—she still had trouble thinking of her as "Ashi"—was like, and resolved to ask the person who was most likely to know. She found him, not surprisingly, in the cockpit.

"Hey, Bastila," he said, as she sat down gingerly in the copilot seat.

"Carth," she nodded tartly. Then, deciding it was easiest to be straightforward, she asked, "I was wondering... what can you tell me about Ashi?"

He turned to her, surprised. "Why? What do you want to know?" he asked curiously. She shrugged generally, and he smiled tiredly, leaning back in his seat and looking up at the ceiling. "Well. She's very capable, and she doesn't like help from other people, or being treated like she's helpless. She's kind, though, and she has a sense of right and wrong, even if she's not necessarily law-abiding. After all, she was a smuggler, I guess, which probably makes you willing to bend the rules.

"She is a good person, though, even if she does the good things she does things in… unusual ways. Did you know, she spent a whole day in the sewers, just looking for journals to help out a crazy old Outcast man? And…"

He sighed deeply. "She's fiery and stubborn. She doesn't like to give up, and if she sets her mind to something, it's impossible to talk her out of it." He rolled his eyes, obviously remembering one thing or another, and then turned to look at the Jedi. "Is that enough?"

Bastila nodded slowly. "You said that she's honorable, though? And she has a strong sense of right and wrong?" She couldn't help some relief seeping into her voice, as she heard Carth's high opinion of Ashi. Perhaps the Council had succeeded with the new identity, after all._ Of course_, she chided herself, _I shouldn't have doubted them. The Masters know what they are doing._

Carth nodded uncertainly. "Why wouldn't she?"

The Jedi grimaced, backtracking quickly. "Never mind. I was just wondering." He nodded absentmindedly, already distracted by flying the ship. "Thank you, Carth. I'll leave you in peace now."

Ashi, meanwhile, had just found Mission, hiding in the engine room. "Hey, kid," she said softly, sitting down next the Twi'lek.

Mission, who had had her head in her hands, looked up. Her face was slightly blotchy and tearstained. "How you doing?" Ashi asked slowly.

"With Taris, you mean?" Mission sniffed quietly. "It's… tough. I mean, I grew up there, right? And now it's just gone. I knew the Sith were evil and all, but it still kind of slaps you in the face, you know?"

Ashi nodded sympathetically. "Yeah, I know. This happened to my world too. Deralia. It sucks."

"Yeah... really. Look," she added quickly, "I'm not saying I can't go on or anything. But I just need a little time to deal with it, yeah?"

The older girl smiled understandingly. "Yeah. Take your time, kid. I know it's hard, but you're tough. You'll pull through."

Mission looked up at Ashi for a long moment, and then suddenly began to cry. Tears poured down her face as Ashi wrapped her arms comfortingly around her. It didn't matter anymore that Taris had been a scum pit. It was Mission's home, and that meant she loved it, regardless. But Ashi stayed, keeping quiet because she knew there was nothing to say. Mission appreciated that, more than she knew how to explain. It was that moment, although the girl didn't realize it, when Ashi slowly began to take Griff's place.

* * *

The trip to Dantooine was long and uneventful, and Ashi spent most of it with Canderous, listening to his old war stories. He was full of them, and though he would never say so, Ashi got the feeling he enjoyed sharing them. She also spent a lot of her time playing Pazaak with Mission, who was a card shark in training, and in the cockpit with Carth, where she grudgingly assumed the role of copilot.

Waking up in her fifth solid day of flying, by which time she had lost most of her credits to Mission and pestered all the stories she was going to get out of Canderous, she decided it was safest to help Carth fly. Heading up to the cockpit with two mugs of caffa, she found him already there, in the pilot seat. She handed him a mug and he grinned. "Thanks, beautiful."

"Ugh," she muttered, dropping into the other seat. "That doesn't apply this early in the morning." She attempted to comb back her hair, pulling a face, and he smiled.

"Nah, it always applies," he murmured, without thinking. She glanced over at him, a bemused look on her face as she blushed lightly.

"So, how much longer to Dantooine? Are we there yet?" she wondered playfully, taking a sip of caffa and glancing over a galaxy map in front of her.

He shrugged. "Not long, I think. We should arrive tomorrow." He paused; she had a distracted look on her face that usually meant she had something else to say. "It's not just that, is it?"

Ashi sighed helplessly. "I'm that obvious?"

He smiled. "No, I'm just perceptive. What's on your mind, Ashi?"

She bit her lip, suddenly fascinated by the map in front of her. "Look, flyboy, I know you don't want to tell me why you're so mistrustful, but…" Her voice trailed off as she sensed the atmosphere become immediately frigid. The temperature in the cockpit seemed to drop twenty degrees as Carth's face creased into a sharp glare. He purposely didn't look over at her.

"I thought I said I didn't want to discuss that?"

She shrugged hopefully. "Well, yeah. Several times. But I'm going to need to hear it one more time anyway." He didn't say anything, so she added, "Don't you think you'd feel better if you talked about it?"

He shook his head fiercely, glaring at the controls in front of him. "Look, sister," he snapped, "just because we're working together does not mean you get to badger me with constant questions!"

Ashi's eyes narrowed. "Hell, yeah, it does," she objected. He sighed in aggravation, and she rolled her eyes. "Oh, do we have another _problem_ now?" she asked bitterly. "Space, Republic, I can't even have a conversation with you without you blowing up at me."

Carth turned to glare at her, and she returned his icy gaze, as the tension mounted in the room until it was nearly tangible. He finally slammed his fist down on the arm of his chair, breaking the stare-off.

"Blast it if you aren't the most frustrating woman to talk to! Isn't there someone else you can harass for a little while?"

Ashi tilted her head in mock-consideration. "Besides the Jedi brat? Hmm, no one this fun." But she shook her head, and turned to leave, grabbing her caffa as she headed for the door. "Well, no need for you to feel _harassed_. I'll just go, save you the burden of my company."

She made for the door, a ferocious scowl on her face, but Carth suddenly called out, surprising both of them.

"No, wait," he called. "I didn't mean it that way. Don't go. Damn it," the pilot sighed, as she ignored him, and got up, rushing after her. He grabbed her by the elbow and she turned and crossed her arms, cocking an eyebrow in an expression that demanded to know why she shouldn't. He took a deep breath. "Damn. All I can do is offend you, isn't it?"

Ashi half-grinned. "Well, yeah, flyboy, you seem to be pretty damn good at that."

Carth smiled, relieved she wasn't angry, and admitted, reluctantly, "I guess that I could use someone to talk to. I'm just not very used to it. And I don't know why you're so interested," he added.

Ashi shrugged. "You're right. You're so annoying, I sometimes don't know why I bother." But then she frowned. "I just… you're so obviously miserable. I don't want you to be like that. I mean, a depressed Republic pilot, it doesn't get much worse." She tried a grin; it flickered and died. "Is that so wrong?" she challenged sharply.

"You can't help everyone," he snapped.

She looked away. "Well, maybe I can help you," she offered quietly.

Carth paused, and shook his head, brushing off her sympathy. "You know what? Fine. Here goes—why I'm not going to trust any of you just yet." He sat back down in the pilot seat, looking down at the controls. Ashi, sensing that he needed a moment to gather his thoughts, walked over to stand next to him, wrapping her hands around her caffa mug to warm them. Finally, Carth spoke, his voice a monotone.

"When I think of all the men who betrayed us, the one that stands out above all of them is the one I respected the most. Saul."

Ashi frowned at only the first name. "Saul? Should I know who that is?"

He looked surprised. "You don't? I thought everyone did. Admiral Saul Karath is the commander of the entire Sith fleet. He's half the reason Malak's done so well in the war. Saul… he was my commanding officer back when the Mandalorian wars first began. He taught me everything about being a soldier; I looked up to him. And then he approached me before he left—talked to me about how the Republic was on the losing side and how I needed to start thinking about my survival.

"I know now that he was trying to recruit me into the Sith, but I couldn't have conceived of it then. I argued with him and he got angry and he left. I never saw him again. But he was fracking serious," he added with a pained expression on his face, and Ashi waited expectantly. "He gave the Sith the codes to bypass out defenses. He attacked Telos."

She raised her eyebrows skeptically. "You really didn't see that coming, after his little Sith recruitment speech?"

"Maybe I didn't want to believe it. Are you so sure you would have? I just… I couldn't conceive of it. Saul was my mentor, he lead us to so many victories against the Mandalorians even when things looked to be at their worst. I couldn't have imagined… he couldn't be serious.

"I was wrong of course," he added angrily. "He not only left us for the Sith, he led the attack on my… our home world. I remember waking up as the first of the Sith bombers snuck past our defenses and started destroying half of our docked ships. I suddenly realized what must have happened." His brown eyes filled with guilt. "See? I could have stopped him. I could have stopped it all!"

Ashi felt a sudden rush of annoyance at him. "You're beating yourself up over what could have happened? Damn, Carth," she snapped, "do you really believe that? That if you had attacked him then, none of this would have happened?"

He shrugged calmly. "I don't know. Maybe I would have killed him, or he would have killed me." He either ignored, or just didn't notice Ashi's flinch as he talked so casually about his death. "But, I was… I was stupid; I was too trusting, and because of that he nearly destroyed us all."

She nodded gently, biting her lip. It didn't make Carth's mistrustfulness any less hurtful, but at least she understood it now. "Look," said Carth fiercely, "I've fought Saul for years now, and if I ever catch up with him—he will regret what he's done. He will regret it."

She nodded. "I get it," she said finally. "I'd do the exact same thing in your shoes."

He grimaced. "Well, actually, there… there is more to the story. But not today." She understood, and nodded to show him so, before turning and walking out of the room, leaving Carth alone with his thoughts. Most of them were about memories, but some of them were about her, and a very small amount of them were about how it felt kind of good to talk about it.

* * *

**next stop, Dantooine. a warning--i hate the Jedi planet, so i'm sort of cheating: none of the side quests while i'm there, except the crystal cave. that means no Romeo and Juliet feud, sorry...  
**

**And a little foreshadowing (b/c did you really think Ashi wants to be a Jedi?)**

**Vrook: See? She is full of anger! You were too gentle on her mind; she hasn't changed a bit!**  
**Zhar: What would you have us do? It is not right to erase a person's entire being! She is simply headstrong. I seem to recall, Vrook, that _you_ used to think it was an admirable trait...**

**r&r, as always (come on, it's so easy...)  
**


	8. Déjà Vu

**Finally, Dantooine! Like I said, I'm cheating and rushing because I don't like the planet: it's going to be 2 long chapters so I can start on the real plot soon. Naturally, b/c I hate the Jedi, Ashi will too... more on this later.

* * *

**

**Déjà vu: (**_**psychology**_**) the illusion of having previously experienced something actually being encountered for the first time  
**

Finally, the Ebon Hawk arrived on Dantooine. Ashi's first impression was that it looked incredibly boring. Her second thought, however, was a disconcerting sensation of déjà vu. This was slightly disturbing, since she was positive she had never been there before—or indeed, anywhere at all like it. Rustic farm planets had less need for her services than city planets, and anyway, she couldn't really get into the whole 'natural beauty' thing that Jedi seemed to love.

Bastila seemed to have finally found something she liked, however. "Oh, Dantooine," she sighed contentedly, gazing out at the grassland planet. "It seems like years since I last set foot on her surface, although in truth it has only been a few months."

Ashi was about to say she would happily never set foot on Dantooine's surface, and by the way, when could they leave, but then Bastila turned to her, her face resuming its usual imperious expression.

"Come," she said commandingly, "we should go and speak to the Jedi Council. Doubtless they will have much to speak with you about."

Everyone in listening vicinity looked surprised, and naturally, Carth was the first to voice his skepticism. "What? What do they want with Ashi?"

Ashi was about to tell him about her potential Force sensitivity, but Bastila leapt in haughtily. "Carth, I believe this is a matter for the Jedi Council. You would do well to not concern yourself with things that do not concern you."

"Ooh…" Mission began teasingly, but a glare from Bastila shut her up right away, probably as she remembered the Jedi's ability to trip through the Force.

Carth seemed to debate arguing, but to everyone's obvious surprise, he shrugged in acceptance. "Well, okay. I don't like this, but I guess we can do things your way for a while." Ashi looked especially unbelieving—Carth, putting his trust in a bunch of preachy old men?—but she had little time to be surprised; the next moment Bastila led her firmly off the ship.

She followed the Jedi through several halls and a courtyard, into a large circular room where two human men, a Twi'lek, and a very short creature with large ears stood, all wearing Jedi robes and austere expressions. Ashi rolled her eyes as Bastila bowed deeply and with no hint of mockery. The next moment she straightened and murmured, "Might I have a moment with the Masters?" to Ashi, in a tone that suggested she leave. Ashi shook her head in annoyance, but left the room. Tiredly, she slouched into the courtyard, and sat down on a small, uncomfortable bench.

"You there! Padawan!"

It took Ashi a moment to realize the shout was directed towards her. The speaker, a tall, contemptuous girl who reminded her a bit of Bastila, was walking over, looking angry.

"Where are your Jedi robes? Do you presume to mock the sacred customs of our order?" she demanded. Ashi frowned at her, crossing her arms: she didn't like being lectured, and especially when she hadn't actually done anything wrong.

"Excuse me?" she replied, looking down at her favorite clothes, and then at the Jedi's unflattering robes. "Do you presume to call me a Jedi, Jedi?"

The girl looked surprised. "You are not? I assumed…the Force is very strong with you. I thought you must be. Forgive me," she said, immediately repentant. "My master does tell me that I often act rashly without thinking. I am sorry I was so hostile to you. I will go meditate on this behavior." Ashi barely concealed a smirk when she realized the girl was perfectly serious.

"Go on, then. I don't need a progress report," she replied, and the girl left quickly. Ashi sat there a moment longer, feeling unbearably bored, before deciding she'd given the brat long enough with her masters. She headed back to the room, stopping when she realized they were still speaking. Curiosity getting the better of her, she paused outside the room and began to eavesdrop.

"…But the events on Taris leave no question about it, the Force has already begun to reappear!" said the short one. Ashi frowned. _Re_appear? She had never been a Jedi before, never shown any signs of being above average, except perhaps good reflexes, and an unusually clever ability in persuasion.

"There is no question about it, indeed! From what Bastila has said," snapped an old, scowling Jedi with frown wrinkles, "even if she has a sense of right and wrong, and a kind nature, she is already developing the same problems. Righteous anger, for instance. Not to mention emotional attachments, if what you have told us is correct," he added, nodding to Bastila. "What if we should take this one to train, and the Dark Lord would return?"

Ashi frowned. _They're talking about me, definitely… but they think I'm going to go evil? That I'm the next Sith Lord?_ The conversation was beginning to confuse her, and she got the feeling that they knew something she didn't.

"And what if we should not take her for training? You are suggesting, Master Vrook, that we simply allow her newfound power to manifest itself unstructured?" challenged a vaguely younger dark-skinned man.

"Master Dorak is correct. This would be a sure path to the dark side," replied the short one. Dorak nodded his gratitude.

/I think that what we will need to do is train her. In this way, at least we can attempt to guide her from the dark side/ agreed the red-skinned Twi'lek.

Everyone but Vrook nodded in agreement, and the old Jedi sighed irritably, outvoted. "Very well. Bastila, go fetch her."

Bastila nodded and immediately turned and headed for the entrance, so fast Ashi didn't have time to respond before she saw her. Her face grew horrified as she took in Ashi, who was trying but not succeeding to look innocent. She seized the girl and dragged her, protesting, into the council chamber.

All the masters' faces became stern and disapproving, as they realized she had been listening in, except for Vrook, who was nodding in an 'I told you so' way. "Ashi," said the dark-skinned Jedi with a frown, as if the name tasted odd in his mouth, "this was a shameful act. I am sure you understand that eavesdropping is something that cannot be tolerated here." He stopped, and his face grew almost nervous. "How much of our conversation did you overhear?"

Ashi frowned as well; she was puzzling over the conversation, and had reached the only possible conclusion. "Well, I'm a Force sensitive," she said slowly, figuring there was nothing to be gained from lying to Jedi. "And you've decided to take me for training. But you all seem to have decided I'm likely to become the next Revan, or something." She didn't miss everyone exchanging conspiratorial glances when she said that. "He," she gestured at Vrook, "especially doesn't like me." Vrook rolled his eyes but didn't deny it. "But you all think that I'm too powerful or something to let me be."

The short one nodded. "Then you have heard most of our discussion. We are considering you for training. It would be best if you were to become a Jedi, so that your power might develop safely."

Ashi crossed her arms, an expression of distaste creeping over her face. Her eyes narrowed slightly. "You _do_ want me to be a Jedi?"

/Yes, we would like to train you, so you can develop your abilities…/ began the Twi'lek, but Ashi interrupted.

"Don't Jedi… shun emotion, and all that?" she continued, and the Council caught on.

"This is for the good of all, including the Jedi themselves," replied Dorak. "Strong emotions are dangerous for Jedi, with consideration to their power. Emotional attachments are generally discouraged."

"You discourage love?" Ashi demanded heatedly. "You want me to give up love and emotion to go be a preachy little brat like her?" She pointed vaguely to Bastila, whose mouth dropped open in indignation.

"You must understand there is more at stake than your personal feelings!" Vrook snapped. "This is a sacrifice all Jedi make!"

"Most Jedi," Ashi retorted, glaring, "are what, five, when they're taken from their families? I'm sure it's very difficult to make a kid forswear love," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "You beat these little morals into their impressionable heads before they're old enough to make a choice for themselves!"

Her voice was rising as she spoke, and all the Jedi, except maybe the short one and Vrook, were having trouble not flinching under her steely gaze. "But you know what? _I _can make my own choices, and I don't _want_ to be a Jedi!" She threw them one final scowl, before turning on her heel and storming out of the room.

There was a pause. "Well," said Dorak finally, "she has retained her dislike for us. We have done well in that."

Vrook shook his head bitterly. "Oh, yes, Dorak. Masterful." He turned to Vandar. "Do you see? She is full of anger! You were too gentle on her mind; she hasn't changed a bit!"

/What would you have us do?/ demanded Zhar. /It is not right to erase a person's entire being! She is simply headstrong. I seem to recall, Vrook, that you used to think it was an admirable trait./

Vrook's jaw clenched, and his frown wrinkles deepened. "That was before it led to her fall!"

"There is nothing to be gained from arguing," chastised Vandar reproachfully. "We will keep her here, and she will agree eventually." One by one, unwilling to disagree with him, the other masters nodded reluctantly.

Ashi, meanwhile, stormed onto the Ebon Hawk. She went straight to the cockpit, followed by Mission, Carth, and Canderous. "What's wrong?" Mission asked immediately.

"Jedi," snapped Ashi, succeeding in making them even more puzzled.

"What did they do?" Carth asked worriedly.

"They want me to join them," she replied angrily, sliding into the pilot seat and beginning to flick switches on the console in front of her.

Mission frowned, confused. "But… wouldn't that be cool? You can get a lightsaber and learn to use the Force and all. Hey," she added brightly, "you could trip Bastila! That would be great!"

Ashi couldn't help snickering a little at that thought, but then sighed. "It's still not worth it." They all looked puzzled, and she said, "You guys know about the vows Jedi have to take and stuff, don't you?"

Realization dawned on the faces of Carth and Canderous, and the Mandalorian smirked. "Not too into celibacy, Lucas?"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "No, I'm not too into that, actually. Would you like to promise to live without love?"

Everyone glanced around awkwardly and mumbled a little, but the general consensus seemed to be 'no'. Then, it suddenly registered with Carth that she was starting up the ship.

"What are you doing, then?" he asked frustratedly, gesturing at the controls she was already starting to manipulate. "Going to start up the ship and leave? What will you do?" It occurred to him as he asked, though, that Ashi didn't really seem like a person who ever did things with a plan.

She shrugged, trying to pretend she'd thought about it. "I have the fastest ship in the galaxy. I'll pick up where I left off with smuggling. Any of you who want can come with me; Carth, I'll drop you and anyone not coming at the first Republic outpost I see."

Canderous grinned. "Is that a threat?"

Ashi smiled wryly, although she didn't take her eyes off the console. "I don't make threats, Ordo. I make promises." Carth still seemed to be about to object, but at that moment, just as Ashi flipped on the motors and the ship began to rise off the ground, a sudden jerk threw her out of her seat.

She leapt to her feet, immediately bristling as she felt the ship hit the ground with a jarring thud. "What in space was that?"

Carth looked out the window. "Looks like the Jedi aren't so interested in you leaving so soon," he replied. Vandar had a hand held out, palm down, and Ashi realized as she looked at him that he was holding down the ship so it couldn't take off.

She stormed off the Hawk, coming face-to-face—relatively speaking—with the diminutive Jedi. "Let fracking go of my ship!" she exclaimed, glaring down at him. "I brought you Bastila! I can go now, can't I?"

He frowned at her, but it was not angry, simply the sort of look one might give a child who was being unreasonable. "We cannot allow you to leave. You must remain here until you will see reason."

"Wait," Ashi growled. " You plan to keep me prisoner on this goddamn planet until I agree to go be a goddamn Jedi." The crew of the Ebon Hawk, watching the exchange, all looked slightly worried for the little Jedi.

"It is not imprisonment. We wish to keep you here peacefully, until you agree to undergo your training."

Ashi shook her head. "This is _blackmail_! You and the Republic both, you can't make me join you, so you have to trap me in your little corners until I don't have a choice!" Her voice rose as she spoke, until she was shouting at Vandar. "I don't _want_ to be a Jedi! What the hell gives you the right to force me to be one?"

He sighed. "You are angry," he told her, ignoring her mutter of, 'hell, yes, I'm angry!' "Your judgment is clouded. Until you see reason, you must remain here."

Ashi looked like she wanted to scream at Vandar, but instead she took a deep breath and shoved past him, heading for the door to the outside of the enclave.

Vandar looked after her, a vaguely pleased look on his face. "Did you see that?" he asked, as the rest of the Council emerged from the doorway where they had been watching. "She regained control of her temper."

Vrook rolled his eyes. "It shows nothing," he muttered, but the other Jedi looked impressed.

/Perhaps there is hope, then/ replied Zhar. From the corner of his eye, however, he noticed Carth, who hurried after Ashi. /But she has already developed attachments. This may be of concern./

Ashi stomped to the door to the enclave, fuming, and an unhelpful-looking droid stepped in front of her. "The Council has not expressed permission for you to leave…" it began, but Ashi's patience had been tested enough. Before the droid could utter another mechanical syllable, she had slashed at it so hard with her vibroblade that the entire torso exploded in a burst of sparks, and the body clattered to the floor.

She shoved open the door and stepped outside.

Dantooine was no better than it had appeared from space. Ashi stared around once at the serene-looking farmland and people, and her face creased in disgust. She ignored the path, and headed off across the fields.

A moment later, Carth hurried through the door, not missing the decimated droid, and caught a glimpse of red in the field. He took off at a walk after her, deciding it probably wouldn't be a good idea to get in her way—especially after seeing the state of the droid, evidently the last thing that had made that mistake.

He finally found her, sitting on a ledge and looking desolately over the fields that continued as far as the eye could see. It was probably something some people would have found beautiful, with the golden sunset lighting up the horizon, but Ashi obviously didn't think so, considering the mixed hopelessness and anger on her face.

She must have heard him coming, because although she didn't turn to look at him, she muttered quietly, "Hi, flyboy."

He walked over slowly and sat down next to her. A light breeze ruffled her hair, and she didn't look away from the sky. "Are you okay?" he asked softly. His voice was concerned, but Ashi wasn't in the mood for condolences.

"Hell no," she snapped. "Do I fracking look like I am?" But then she sighed. "No one will let me just be neutral. I don't care, flyboy," she whispered, her voice tinged with frustration. "I know you've always been a soldier, and you've got your all-consuming vengeance wish against Saul besides, but I've always been _neutral_. None of this even affected me, not until I got drafted by your stupid Republic!"

Carth could hear the bitterness in her tone, and felt a rush of sympathy for her. It didn't seem fair, he realized, to make her fight for something she didn't believe in. "My plan was to get off Taris and get my life back. Now the Jedi want me to pledge myself to them, and they won't let me leave unless I join them, and give up everything that makes life worth living, to go become a mindless drone of theirs like _Bastila_!" She said all that in one resentful breath, before lapsing back into a sullen silence.

Carth couldn't help a grin. "Don't worry, beautiful, I can't picture you like Bastila. You've got a sense of humor."

She smiled, too, but then added unhappily, "Still! They won't let me go, until I say I'll go be a good little Jedi."

Carth grimaced. "Well, then there's really only one thing you can do, isn't there?"

She looked over at him, eyes wide with injustice. "You want me to go agree to them?"

"Well, what else can you do?" he demanded. "Keep all of us stuck too, because we can't leave while you're trying to prove something to the Jedi? Let Malak destroy the galaxy while you stay here and sulk?"

She shrugged halfheartedly. "Well, yeah, that sounded good."

She was being stubborn. Carth realized all at once that there was really only one way to get to her now—which, unfortunately, might also be very dangerous.

"You're giving up," he said quietly.

Ashi's head snapped up to face him, her eyes blazing. "I'm not _giving up_! You know what? It's my goddamn _life_! Excuse me for not wanting to sacrifice it."

"No, you know what? You," he said, getting back to his feet and pointing in the direction of the enclave, "are going to go back there and tell the Council that you will be a Jedi. No one says you have to stay a Jedi! You just need to sit through their training until they're satisfied with you, and then you can go do whatever the hell you want! But I am not going to sit out the war on this fracking farm planet because _you're_ being stubborn."

Her hand jerked suddenly for her vibroblade, and she froze, before hissing, "Fine!" Ashi leapt up and spun on her heel, beginning to head back across the field. "I'll go be a Jedi, so you can go fight in your precious war and have your petty little revenge."

Carth stopped, flinching at her words. He knew, sort of, that wanting revenge against Saul was petty, but it hurt to hear someone else say it.

"You're welcome," she added bitterly. Then she turned and stormed off—he could only hope it was to find the Jedi masters.

* * *

The next day, Ashi's training began.

It was everything she had feared it would be. Tedious exercises in Force control, followed by meditation, followed by studying history, followed by meditating on her studies, followed by sparring—and then some more meditating, just in case. Needless to say, Ashi was in a bad mood, and was now refusing to even look at Carth or Bastila.

However, she had little time to see any of them, so intense was her training. The Jedi seemed to be working her as quickly as they could, though to be fair, it seemed to be working. All the studies Ashi was made to memorize felt like she already knew them; all the Force exercises came easily to her. Even the fighting styles she was taught felt natural. Everything was almost too familiar, and she spent her days haunted by a pressing feeling of déjà vu.

The constant feeling was emphasized at night. The small flashes she had seen were becoming more and more frequent when she slept, as she dreamed new visions of herself and a small group of children on Dantooine, training as Jedi. Always there was the blond man, now only a little boy. He was maybe a few years older than her, but always by her side.

She learned his name after almost two months—Alek—but never her own. The Masters called her 'Padawan', and Alek would give her friendly nicknames. The most common was Red—an impressively original reference to her hair—or sometimes 'boss'. That was a joke, but at the same time, it said everything about who was in charge in their little group.

That girl, Red, also seemed to feel almost the same way about the Jedi as Ashi. Although she was young, and so some—Vandar, for example—seemed impressive, she didn't have the same general awe for them as her companions. Above all, Ashi found this the most interesting.

The biggest thing that both she and Red couldn't stand about their training was meditating. Jedi seemed to find such peace in it, sitting still and searching their souls. To Ashi, that made no sense at all. She found her mind instead drifting to the visions, searching them, trying to piece together an understanding of the person she kept becoming and the boy who was her best friend.

One afternoon, however, a couple months into her training, the masters had seen fit to give her a long lecture on how not meditating led to the dark side. Sullenly, she was sent out to the courtyard to meditate 'properly'.

Ashi sighed, and closed her eyes, reaching out with the Force like she had been taught. Almost automatically, by now, her mind seemed to open, and all the forces of life she felt around her flowed into her. It was amazing to some of the Jedi, probably. For her, it was just boring, on a planet where all the life was peaceful and beige.

She felt a sudden and well-known feeling of curiosity bubbling up inside her. The _point_ of meditating was to connect with the world around her, but what if she could channel the power instead? Instead of letting their awareness run into her, she could reach out to them with her own…

Not stopping to hesitate, in case she realized how many things could go wrong, she left the power she could sense run back into the air. It seemed to expand around her, like a bubble; pure energy flowed from her as she felt herself lose touch with physical senses.

It felt like she was no longer just Ashi. She could feel everything around her, sense every inch of the space within and around her bubble. It was almost overpowering, but she didn't feel overwhelmed. It felt good. She was more in touch with everything around her than she had ever been before.

Then, Ashi felt someone approach.

The person came closer, and with a sudden jolt, they entered the space around her. Immediately she felt her senses rush through them as if they were only as solid as the wind. She could see _through_ their mind.

She saw, with the other person's vision, herself: levitating; a strange white light seeming to emanate from her. She looked peaceful, her eyes closed and her floating hair splayed out around her face. Ashi could read the person's emotions, too, as they went from stunned to awestruck. She felt a fleeting thought race through his mind, and into hers: that she looked ethereal, almost angelic as she floated there.

_That's how he sees me?_ she wondered.

The newfound power was exhilarating, and without thinking, she probed deeper into his mind. The next moment, an unexpected, devastating rush of pain hit her. Memories of suffering and loss overwhelmed her, as, with a cry, she fell from the air and hit the ground. She couldn't even feel the physical pain; the anguish she had sensed, that felt branded into her mind, was too much. Her mind instinctively cut off from the state of hyper-awareness that she had felt a moment ago.

She heard someone rush over to her as she lay there, gasping for breath. Slowly she forced her eyes open, and saw Carth bending over her, his face creased in concern. Still panting, she managed four words.

"You _live_ like that?"

Carth's face grew stunned, and he recoiled as if slapped. That was just as well, for at the next second, the Council hurried over. Ashi was unsure what they wanted, until Zhar stepped forward, looking pleased.

/You have made great progress with your meditation/ he said.

She shrugged, regaining her sense of sarcasm as the shock faded. "Is this about the whole floating thing?"

Zhar continued, unperturbed. /Ashi, you have learned to channel the Force from the world around you; this is an important skill for a Jedi. You have also learned all your studies well, and excel at combat. You have done in months what many cannot do in years./ He managed to stop listing accomplishments, however, when he saw the 'get to the point' look on her face. /The council believes you are ready for your final tests, before you join the Order as a Padawan./

Ashi got to her feet, sighing. _Finally._ "What do I have to do?"

/These tests will assess you in all aspects of your training/ Zhar explained. /They are to ensure you are truly ready to become a member of the Order: that you understand your responsibility as a Jedi and…/

_Blah, blah, blah,_ Ashi thought, sighing inwardly, as Zhar continued on one of the Jedi's patented lectures. Finally, the Twi'lek master finished, /Your first test will be of the Jedi Code. The Code is the guideline for all those in the Jedi order. It is a way of life./

"I know the Code," said Ashi tiredly.

Zhar raised his eyebrows in surprise. /Good. You are precocious, indeed. Very well; recite it for me./

The words flew to mind mechanically, and another feeling of déjà vu enveloped Ashi. "There is no emotion," she began, and mentally added, _there is no love_, "there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no death, there is the Force."

Zhar nodded approvingly. /Good. You have learned your studies well, Padawan. Remember, the Code is what all Jedi must live by—including you, when you become a member of the Order. Think and meditate on this, Padawan. Tomorrow, you will have your second trial./

Ashi nodded, although recalling the day's earlier events, she thought, _Damned if I meditate on anything.

* * *

_

Night was falling, so she made her way back to the Hawk—where she insisted on sleeping—but the second she entered, she was mobbed by a small blue figure, whose mouth was going a mile a minute.

"Whoa!" gasped Mission. "What was that in the courtyard today? That was so cool! You were all floating, and glowing, and… and… and..." Mission's voice trailed off, but not out of lack of enthusiasm: simply because she couldn't find words to express her amazement. Ashi grinned, despite herself.

"Not bad, huh?" she replied. "Because that's what the Jedi thought too. I've started my final test. If I succeed, I'm a full-fledged Jedi." Her voice had an almost invisible edge of bitterness. "So don't worry, Republic," she added loudly to Carth, who was sitting in a chair a few feet away. "You can get off this planet and go fight in your beloved war soon. Today I sold my soul for you guys."

Mission frowned. "Hey, thanks for the guilt trip. _I_ didn't tell you to go be a Jedi."

Ashi sighed irritably. "Yep. That's right. Thanks, Mission, it's nice that some of you let me make my own choices about my life," she snapped, raising her voice pointedly so everyone in the room could hear. Carth ignored her.

"Yeah, well, tell them you quit," he snapped, his voice unsympathetic.

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Oh, right, I'm sure that'll go down well. 'You must not abandon your training, Padawan. This is a sure path to the dark side. You are being foolish and irresponsible. You must not give in to evil and temptation. Bad Padawan. Go meditate on this, Padawan." Mission laughed.

"Don't let the princess catch you talking about her precious masters like that," she said with a grin. "She'll throw a fit."

"Nope, I doubt it," replied Ashi, smirking. "That counts as emotion, I think, and as we all know, there is no emotion." Her face grew suddenly stony, as she added sharply, "Of course, I have to live by that now."

Mission shrugged. "Don't they let Jedi quit, if they want to?"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Evil and temptation, Mission. Even if temptation has never looked so good." Shaking her head tiredly, she left the room and headed for the sleeping quarters.

As soon as she entered the room, she took her jacket off and hung it on the wall, before slipping off her shirt and tossing it away. Just as it hit the floor, Carth turned the corner, approaching the room, and caught sight of her. He reddened and began to apologize instantly, stumbling over his words. Ashi couldn't help grinning at his expense.

"Careful," she teased, momentarily forgetting her anger at him. "The last guy who walked in on me in my underwear ended up dead." Technically true; the last one had been Trask, who had died pretty soon after.

Carth looked relieved. "Knowing you and that temper of yours, I'm not too surprised," he said with a grin, leaning against the doorway.

He still looked a little taken aback, however, and Ashi smirked when she caught his eyes drifting downward slightly. "Sorry to disappoint, flyboy, but I'm a celibate now, remember?" Her smile grew even larger as his embarrassment grew even more obvious. "Chill, I'm teasing," she said. "But why'd you want to talk to me?

Carth sighed, and sat down on a bed opposite her. "When you were meditating…" he began, but stopped uncertainly. Ashi realized what he wanted to ask, but decided to let him say it himself.

"Is this about the floating?" she asked playfully, reaching for a worn tank top on her bed and slipping it on. "Because I didn't know I could do that either."

He shook his head. "It's about… Ashi, what happened? I mean… not just with the floating—and that's not normal either—but then…" His tone grew hesitant, and he lowered his voice. "Were you... in my head?"

She opened her mouth to deny it, but then stopped and grimaced guiltily. Carth looked stunned. "I can't believe you!" he hissed, his face growing scandalized. "You went in my _head_?"

"I couldn't help it!" she snapped back, and then she ran her hands tiredly through her hair. "It wasn't on purpose. But…" She frowned again. "This sounds weird, I know, but I was sort of… hyperaware, I guess. I could sense everything around me, as in, all the life, right? The Force. But then you came closer, and I kind of... sensed you too."

She shrugged. "I didn't know what I was doing, honestly. I guess… I don't know. I could hear your thoughts; I could see through your eyes… I was sort of overwhelmed."

"You heard my thoughts?" Carth asked, looking appalled and, Ashi noticed, a little nervous. "What did you hear?" he asked.

"Nothing," she lied quickly, not wanting to embarrass him too much. "Just you were all, uh, surprised. You didn't know I could do that." Then her expression did become somewhat ashamed. "I guess after that, I did pry a little. Because I was looking deeper, trying to figure out how it all worked, and I think… I saw your memories."

Carth's jaw tightened. "Like what?"

Ashi shrugged, her expression now troubled as she remembered. "Nothing very clear. Just… pain." She looked up at Carth, who had an unreadable look on his face, and shook her head slowly. "I don't get it. You're hurting so much, all the time. You've got all this suffering hanging over your head, and you don't even act like it. You're so…" She paused. "I don't know whether to say tough, or stupid."

She glanced up at him again, and he sighed and gritted his teeth slowly, closing his eyes. "It overwhelmed me," she continued softly. "That was when I fell, when I felt that. It's too much pain for any one person. I don't see how you can live like that."

Carth shrugged. "It's just something you learn to live with. I don't see why you care so much, anyway."

"You're acting like a fracking _masochist_," she snapped. "Hell, yes, I care!"

"I'm just…" The pilot raised his hands, gesturing slightly as he searched for words. "I'm just not used to talking to people about this, Ashi. I'm not used to people caring about what I'm dealing with."

Ashi shifted over, switching beds and sitting next to Carth. "But I do," she said, with a faint grin. "That's the problem, isn't it?" She paused, looking down at her hands. "Look, I want to help you, idiot. That's all. I don't want you surviving just for the sake of vengeance. It's not worth it." She looked up at him imploringly. "Don't do that to yourself, flyboy. Because that would be pretty goddamn stupid, even for you."

He smiled slightly. "Look, I appreciate you caring. It's just... not something I'm used to. I need time. Okay?" He looked down at her, and she nodded.

"I can do time," she replied, and grinning, reached out and gave him a hug. He wrapped his arms around her in return, and smiled. It was kind of nice that she cared, no matter how unused to it he was. And she was persistent. The sudden surprising thought, _she really is a lot like Morgana_, occurred to him, before he instinctively tried to squash the feeling.

Ashi, meanwhile, had thoughts racing around her mind, not the least of which was the word Carth had used to describe her, mid-meditation. _Angelic_. Was that shock value, or something more?

The embrace only lasted a couple seconds, but seemed to continue for several long moments, until a surprised, "Whoa!" came from the door. Mission had just come in to find the two hugging on her bed, and her mind visibly leapt to conclusions. They looked up in surprise, and then, realizing what it looked like to her, both flushed with embarrassment and pulled away.

"Uh, oops. Jeez. Sorry if I, uh, interrupted something," Mission mumbled, trying to hide a smirk. They both quickly shook their heads, and Carth stood up, muttering something about going to bed.

Mission watched him leave, and then turned to Ashi, a curious look on her face. /What was _that?_/ she asked in Twi'leki, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

/That was us hugging. As _friends_, Mission./ Ashi rolled her eyes. /And you have a dirty little mind, for a kid/ she added, kicking off her leggings and getting into bed.

Mission grinned, starting to get into bed herself. /Right, yeah. 'Temptation has never looked so good'?/

Ashi turned to face Mission and chucked a pillow at her. /Grow up, kid/ she retorted, before rolling over to avoid looking at the girl's infuriatingly smug expression. Mission, still smirking, flipped off the lights, and, slowly, the two drifted off to sleep.

* * *

The next day, when Ashi returned to the Jedi masters, Zhar explained to her that today she would choose her class. /There are three basic categories for a Jedi/ he told her. /Each category is different and focuses on different aspects of Jedi training. They also have a specifically colored lightsaber crystal./

Ashi sighed. They couldn't stop trying to fit her into little boxes, could they? "What are the different categories?" she asked reluctantly.

Zhar explained them, slowly and in detail. Ashi was only half listening when he finally asked what kind of Jedi she would be. Out of nowhere, though, words sprang to mind. Ashi felt a rush of the lingering déjà vu, as she blurted, "I want to be a Sentinel."

A sudden memory almost overwhelmed her: looking up at Zhar, albeit a much younger version, and saying, confidently, the same words she had just blurted. In that memory, however, he smiled. Here, he simply nodded, his face unreadable.

/Interesting/ he said. /Very well, go speak to Master Dorak. He will test you briefly to see what class you are best suited to./

Master Dorak was waiting for her when she walked over. Ashi didn't mind Dorak. Despite them being blackmailing Jedi, the only Master she could outwardly disrespect was Vrook. Vandar and Vrook were too patient, and though Dorak seemed uncertain of her, he was always cheerful in their face-to-face conversations, no matter how sullen she tried to be. It was very hard to be angry with someone who never raised their voice or, really, showed any emotion at all.

"Hello, Ashi," he said pleasantly. "You wish to determine your class in the Order?"

"Sentinel," she said immediately, with a nod.

"Very well. We shall see. I have a few questions to test which category you would be best suited too. Let us begin."

'A few' did not really mean a few. Ashi answered the questions unenthusiastically, her patience beginning to wear thin after the quiz continued for over half an hour. Curiously, Dorak began to look increasingly anxious as the questioning continued, and finally he stood up nervously. "That will do. I must go speak with the other masters."

He left the room, evidently to discuss her fate with his Jedi posse. Ashi stayed in her seat, tapping her fingers on the chair. The minutes dragged on in silence as she waited to hear her fate. Meanwhile, the Masters were discussing her results worriedly.

"Her answers were most definitely suitable for the Sentinel class," Dorak explained in hushed tones. "She possesses the necessary diplomacy but also the acceptance of combat as useful and often necessary. Understandable, really—she could easily be a Guardian if she desired. But her answers were… virtually unique." He grimaced. "They were almost exactly the same as before."

The Council all looked shocked and slightly horrified, except for Vrook, who looked righteous and accusing. "You didn't use enough force on her mind! Her old self is obviously still there!" he exclaimed. "If her answers are the same, then that leaves us to assume that she has not changed at all! What proof do we have that she has truly cast off the darkness she was consumed by before?"

Vandar shook his head. "Master Vrook we did all we could without destroying her mind. She has shown no signs of being the Sith Revan. We must give her the benefit of the doubt."

Vrook sighed irritably and rolled his eyes, but even he didn't contradict Vandar. "Master Zhar, your student will be wondering what is going on. You should return to her and continue the trial."

Zhar nodded slowly, and, taking the yellow crystal Dorak offered him, left the room. Ashi was, indeed, sitting where Dorak had left her, and looking incredibly bored.

She perked up, however, when the Twi'lek master entered. "What now?"

He proceeded to instruct her on how to construct a lightsaber. Ashi quickly realized this was going to be an infamous Jedi lecture, and tuned out, nodding when appropriate but only half listening. Finally he led her over to a workbench. /I will observe while you assemble your lightsaber./

Ashi nodded, and began to fit the pieces together. _It's... familiar_, she realized with a start, as everything seemed to go perfectly. Zhar watched quietly, and when she was done, she flicked it on. A blade of yellow light erupted from the end. Zhar looked impressed. /You have constructed it perfectly, the… first time. That is very unusual./

Ashi shrugged. "Yeah, it's weird. But it feels familiar. It's like I've done all this before." Zhar stared at her, and his expression made her regret speaking. He had paled from his usual reddish color to an odd shade of pink.

"It's like… constant déjà vu. But probably nothing," she added quickly, trying to make up for having mentioned it in the first place. Zhar still looked horrified. His lekku twitched frantically.

/That is…indeed, strange/ he said slowly. /But I am sure you are right, and it is nothing. You have done excellently with this second trial. Return tomorrow for your final trial. You are dismissed./

Ashi frowned at the brisk dismissal, but decided not to test her luck. She headed out of the enclave, going off to explore the fields: she hoped to see something to test her new lightsaber on. As she walked, however, she found herself at the mouth of a cave.

The déjà vu, now a constant at the back of her mind, became suddenly overwhelming. Dizzy, she sunk to her knees. In an instant, a shocking realization occurred to her—this was where her vision after the rancor explosion had taken place. She was positive; the cave was several feet away, the entrance somewhat overgrown but still very definitely the same.

She shook her head slowly, her mind spinning. If this place was real, a place she had certainly never been to before but seen perfectly, then… were the rest of the visions true as well? All the ones of training on Dantooine and the feeling that all this had happened before… was that because it had? _And Alek_, she thought with a jolt. _Is he real?_

She took a shaky breath. She didn't want to tell any of her friends about this: they would think she had gone insane. But, on the other hand, she wanted to tell the Council even less.

Ashi paused a moment longer, and then resolved not to tell anyone. It would be too difficult to explain, and she didn't want them thinking she was crazy... especially after the way Zhar reacted to her mention of familiarity.

She hurried back to the enclave. Another day, she would explore the cave and try to figure out whether it was important. She'd had enough eerie experiences for today.

* * *

The next day, when Ashi came to see Zhar, he had a smile on his face that was mostly proud. /Congratulations/ he said in greeting. /You are ready for your final test. If you succeed in this, you will become a full member of the Jedi Order./

Ashi nodded. _Like I didn't know that already. Like I wasn't dreading it for the last three months...  
_

"What do I have to do?" she asked halfheartedly.

/There is a grove near here/ explained Zhar. /For a long time, we have used as a place of meditation. However, as of recently, a taint has corrupted this grove. You are to cleanse the grove of this taint. There is a map here that will help you find your way there./

Ashi waited expectantly, but he had said all he would. "That's all?" she asked suspiciously. "What aren't you telling me? What's the taint?"

Zhar shook his head. /I cannot tell you that. There are some things you have to see for yourself. But remember this, Ashi: things are not always as they seem, and those who have fallen to the dark side are not necessarily lost forever./

Ashi rolled her eyes._ Oh, that's helpful._ "All right, Zhar. I'll go cleanse your grove," she sighed, heading out of the room. He might have ignored the scorn on the last few words, or he might not have noticed.

Ashi examined the map unenthusiastically. The grove in question wasn't even too far away. There was definitely something wrong here, and if she was going to walk into their little trap of a test like a good Jedi puppet, she wanted to walk in with firepower to back her up. Boarding the Hawk, she called, "Flyboy! Ordo! You want to go cleanse a grove?"

* * *

As it turned out, Canderous was out hunting Mandalorian raiders, but Bastila, who was in a know-it-all mood—apparently she knew what the mysterious taint was, but was refusing to tell—tagged along, "to observe". Ashi was annoyed with her for, for once, _not_ talking, and decided to wholeheartedly ignore the brat. They set off, but had only just left the enclave when a frantic-looking woman approached them.

"Excuse me, Master Jedi!" she cried, and Ashi stopped, relishing Bastila's annoyed expression as she did not deny the title. "I'm sorry, but are you going out to the fields?" Ashi sighed irritably; the woman had evidently decided that because she was a Jedi, she had nothing better to do than to help her. "My partner has gone missing! Could you look for him while you are there?"

"Gone missing?" asked Ashi. "Like what?"

"I don't know!" the woman moaned pitifully. "I was out working in the garden, and he was in the house, I thought, but when I went inside, the door was open and he was _gone_!"

"Perhaps it could have been Kath hounds?" Bastila offered.

The woman shook her head. "They have been very vicious as of late, but they can't open doors. Anyway, come to think of it, the door was locked, anyway."

Ashi raised her eyebrows, reaching a likely conclusion. "It couldn't have been… I don't know, opened from the inside?"

"You know… that could have happened…" The woman's face grew shocked as Ashi's words sunk in. "But I don't think that he would do that!" she added stubbornly, even as Ashi thought, _Wouldn't blame him._ "His programming…"

Simultaneously, Ashi's eyebrows flew up and her mouth dropped open in shock, and Carth assumed a stunned and slightly amused expression. Bastila, ever the naïve little Jedi, remained blissfully oblivious. "Your… partner is a… droid?" Ashi finally managed, stunned.

The woman looked slightly sheepish. "Well… yes, he is a droid…"

Ashi couldn't swallow a smirk. "And… uh, what did you use him for again?" she asked innocently. Behind her, Carth snickered. Bastila had still not picked up on what Ashi was insinuating, and frowned disapprovingly at the two of them.

"He is a personal assistance droid," snapped the woman, her tone making it clear that she knew exactly what Ashi meant, and would deny it fervently. "He is very dear to me. My husband made him for me, and now he has passed away, this droid is all I have left of him."

She clasped her hands together pleadingly. "Please find him! His absence pains my heart! I simply cannot live without my precious!"

Carth coughed, trying and failing to hide a laugh. "Heh… she really misses her droid, doesn't she?" Ashi couldn't conceal a grin.

"Of course, don't worry," said Bastila immediately, her obtuseness only further amusing Carth and Ashi. "We will keep an eye out for your droid, and…"

Ashi interrupted her. "No, we won't," she said unsympathetically. "I am not looking for your droid. He's probably dead, and it's a lot healthier for you to forget about him," she added with a smirk. "Come on, guys, let's go."

Bastila shrugged helplessly at the woman, and then hurried after Ashi and Carth. As soon as they were far enough away, she turned, and let fly with the lecture they had both seen coming.

"I am ashamed of you!" she exclaimed, glaring reproachfully. "Can you simply not help but laugh at everyone's troubles, and deny help to the needy? That woman," she snapped, enunciating slowly, "is _desperate_!"

The wonderful accidental double-entendre was too much for Ashi, who collapsed into laughter, much to the Jedi's anger. Carth did as well, but managed to choke out, "Hell, yes, she is."

In a sudden rush of comprehension, Bastila made the connection. Her face went even paler than usual. Ashi was finding the whole thing hilarious, as Bastila stuttered, "You mean… that was… she used it for…"

Ashi smirked. "Personal assistance droid?" The Jedi blushed bright red, as the other two laughed all the harder. Carth was surprised, pleasantly so. He hadn't laughed like this, completely carefree, in a long time. He hadn't thought he could, anymore.

Finally, Ashi managed to stop. Muttering, "They don't teach you very much in that enclave, do they?", she began to head in the direction of the mysterious grove.

* * *

**R&R, as always. Anything's good... just let me know that you're still reading :P**

**From the next (and final) Jedi chapter:  
_Mission: Oh my God, Ash, you're hurt!  
Ashi: Yeah, a scratch. Heh... i_**_**t's enough...**_

**Anyone who's read Romeo and Juliet might recognize a line from the best character—****and if you do, you'll know when he uses the line...  
**


	9. Quest

**My last dantooine chapter (_yes!_) I'm going after the only worthwhile quest: the crystal cave. Secret past drama for Ashi, coming up—but first, her showdown with Juhani. It never stops...**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except Ashi's personality (except the mutant kinrath. sort of...)  
**

**

* * *

**

**Quest: 1. a search or pursuit made in order to find or obtain something  
2. **_**(Medieval romance)**_** an adventurous expedition undertaken by a knight or knights to secure or achieve something

* * *

**

After about half and hour, Ashi and her friends arrived at the grove. They stopped several yards away, examining it: a cluster of stone obelisks, engraved with ancient inscriptions. A figure stood among them, deep in meditation. "She doesn't look very taint-like," observed Ashi.

Bastila did not respond, although it looked like it took a lot of effort for her not to. Ashi sighed and began to make her way towards the grove, her friends following close behind. As Ashi neared, she could see the figure better. She was a Cathar, a feline humanoid. All Ashi knew about them was their legendary tempers. She sensed them approaching, and leapt to her feet, snarling.

Ashi's eyes widened. "Uh-oh."

With a wave of her hand, the Cathar froze Bastila and Carth in stasis fields. Ashi, who had managed to see it coming, held out a hand, and the Force attack glanced away as if a wall surrounded her. The Cathar growled in frustration.

Ashi looked over at the frozen Bastila and scowled. "Fat lot of good you are, brat," she said, her voice tinged with annoyance. "But no hard feelings, flyboy."

The Cathar seemed all the more outraged by Ashi's nonchalance. "I will be your doom!" she roared, drawing a lightsaber.

For the first time, and slightly late, it occurred to Ashi that it might not have been a good idea to annoy the 'taint'—but by then the Cathar was already lunging, ears flat against her head and teeth bared. Ashi scrambled back and ducked, igniting her own lightsaber. She blocked the next attack, and then sidestepped a cleaving blow that swept the air where her head had been a moment ago.

Realizing that her new opponent was no easy target, the taint hissed angrily, and sped up her movements with the Force. Ashi paralleled her new speed, and the battle suddenly took on a new level of ferocity.

The two who were frozen watched the new fight with growing awe and fear. The Jedi were almost too fast to see, and Bastila watched in amazement, even though her unmoving face portrayed shock. She knew that Juhani had been a Guardian, and that Ashi was… qualified, to say the least, but actually seeing the two fighting was still incredible.

Though it was becoming apparent that it was more skill against brawn, and that Ashi was the better fighter, Carth was still frozen in horror. It was maddening watching her fight right next to him and not being able to help. Just as Ashi scalded her opponent's arm, however, the Cathar kicked her feet out from under her. Ashi cried out and stumbled, falling to the ground. The taint stopped, breathing heavily, lightsaber poised above her chest. Ashi frowned.

"Are you a Guardian?"

The Cathar froze, caught off guard. At this moment of hesitation, Ashi saw an opening. She reached out a hand in front of her, splaying the fingers suddenly, and the shocked taint went flying into an obelisk. She was stunned for a moment, and that was long enough: when she snapped out of it, Ashi had a lightsaber at her throat.

"No…please…" Juhani gasped, surprising them all.

Ashi stared at her for a long moment. "Let my friends…" She stopped, and glanced at Bastila. "Well, let my companions go." The Cathar nodded, as much as she could, and waved a hand almost imperceptibly. Carth and Bastila were released from the stasis field, and reached for their weapons instinctively, but Ashi held up a hand.

"No." She fixed Juhani with a piercing stare. "Are you going to attack us if I let you go?" Juhani shook her head carefully, and Ashi nodded and retracted her blade. "Now, who are you, and why the hell did you try to kill me?"

"I am Juhani. This is my grove. My grove," she repeated angrily, "and you have invaded it!" Her voice grew madder as she spoke, but Ashi drumming her fingers pointedly on her unlit lightsaber shut her up.

"What makes it yours?"

"It is where I embraced the dark side, my place of dark power. It was where I reached my full power! I gained strength from the darkness, strength enough to crush the life of one such as you… or, so I had thought," she added quietly.

Zhar's hint came back to Ashi, and she turned and scowled at Bastila. "Great. You've given me a community service project." Turning back to Juhani, her face became utterly solemn. "Indeed. Fallen Jedi, why did you…" She paused, searching for a synonym for 'fall'. "Choose to embrace the darkness?"

Bastila seemed unable to tell if she was serious or not, but Carth swallowed a grin. There seemed to be nothing in the galaxy that Ashi took seriously, but it was one of the things that made her interesting.

"During my training, I struck out at my master and injured her fatally," Juhani explained. "After I struck her down, I knew I could not return. But… I am so sorry. My master was a good woman. If she were still here, there would be so much I would tell her, so much to apologize for. I think, in my own way, I truly loved her. But now… she is dead," she finished, with a pitiful sigh.

"No, Juhani. Your master is one with the Force now." Ashi's voice carried a slightly cynical edge, but her guess had been spot-on: Juhani perked up immediately at the Jedi teachings.

"No," she replied eagerly. "How can they forgive me? They should not. I am too full of anger and passion; I will never be a good Jedi."

"Well, the first step to knowledge is knowing you are truly ignorant," replied Ashi sagely, working hard to keep a straight face when Juhani brightened at being called ignorant. "Show them you have freed yourself of this base passion. Your inner serenity and peace will prove your… your inner light." She had decided the best plan, at the moment, was to spout as many words from the Code as she could cram into her sentences.

As it was, it seemed to be working.

"Thank you of your words of wisdom, Master Jedi! You are right! I will return to the masters and ask their forgiveness, showing them I have shed my anger." She smiled. "I cannot thank you enough, but I am sure I will see you again."

"May the Force be with you," Ashi replied with a smirk.

* * *

/You have done well, Ashi/ said Zhar happily. /Juhani has been returned to the light, and the grove has been cleansed of darkness. I am proud to welcome you into the Jedi Order, Padawan./

_Screw subtlety,_ Ashi thought. "Am I done with training?"

/A true Jedi's training is never complete/ said Zhar wisely. However, knowing that was not enough of an answer for Ashi, he added, /But your training here under the Council is complete. You are dismissed, Padawan. Once again, my congratulations./

Ashi nodded, and left the room already distracted. She had the whole afternoon left, and she knew what she wanted to do. The cave from the vision had been omnipresent in her mind, and she was aching to explore it. Briefly, she thought about taking someone, but decided not to; they wouldn't understand why it mattered. Even she didn't.

She left the enclave and set off at a jog, arriving at the cave quickly; it wasn't far away. Once there, she carefully brushed aside the vines and entered. It was dark inside, and as she went in deeper, she ignited her lightsaber so she could see. This turned out to be a very bad idea, as, when she did, she instantly figured out exactly what had poisoned vision-her. She had walked into a kinrath nest.

The spidery creatures came rushing at her. Ashi's reflexes, lightning-fast, saved her life. She hacked and spun, dodging their angry attacks; luckily, they were not very hard to kill. Finally, after all of them were dead, Ashi could stop to examine the cave, and notice something interesting. She saw a sort of light, further in. Intrigued, she headed towards it, and then gasped. She was in a crystal cave.

Lightsaber crystals practically dripped off the walls, radiating lights of different colors. Ashi rushed to the wall, all thoughts of being careful leaving her mind, and went to the walls. The rocks came off in her hand as she tugged gently, and she perused them until one caught her eye: a bright purple crystal. She had just slipped it into her pocket when she sensed something behind her.

Something big.

She turned slowly, and her mouth dropped open in fear, something she didn't experience very often. This, however, was an occasion it was acceptable. In front of her was a kinrath. It was not a regular kinrath, either. This was the king of all the demonic overgrown spiders: feet taller than her, and at least three times as big. White, with dark red stripes and bright red eyes, it looked like it was glaring at her, or possibly sizing her up for dinner. Venom dripped from its single mandible, and sizzled on the floor.

_Oh. Damn._

Ashi allowed herself to hope for a very small second that it didn't plan to attack her, and then it lunged. She lit her lightsaber and tried to sink an attack to the side, but it whacked her away toward the glowing cave wall.

Ashi saw stars for a moment after her head cracked against the rock, and felt warm blood matting her hair. She hissed a stream of curses, before picking herself up and scrambling away as the mandible came swinging towards her. Ducking, she swung at its left. Her blow took a leg off the monster, but it almost seemed not to notice, except perhaps that it became angrier.

It came after her with new fury, and she started using the Force to speed her movements, but it barely helped. The kinrath was fast for its size, and her head injury was slowing her down. She started just working on dodging, but even that ended up not being enough. With a sudden flurry of slashes, the kinrath sunk a sharp, slicing blow along her shoulder and collarbone.

Ashi gasped, and then swore; she could feel the poison already working its way into her bloodstream, lethal and efficient. _I'm going to die_, she realized numbly. _I'm going to die alone in a cave, killed by a fracking bug—arachnid? Space, it doesn't matter, I'm still dying...  
_

_**No**_**.**

Just as she was sure she had imagined the little voice, it spoke again.

_**I will not be killed by a goddamn spider. I refuse to die like this. **_

Anger bubbled up inside her as the voice spoke, and Ashi felt the Force spark at her fingertips. Serving her, she thought, too distracted to realize the dark-sidedness of the thought. She threw her hand, palm out, at the giant kinrath.

Energy exploded from her fingers. The kinrath shrieked shrilly as it was fried by her Force lightning; she kept up the flow of power until it keeled over, dead. Then, the side effects of the attack kicked in, and she felt the draining sense of having used up all her Force power. No chance of healing, then. She had to get back to the enclave.

Ignoring the pain and the blood, she staggered weakly out of the cave. New strength she hadn't known she had rose within her. _I won't die. I refuse to die...  
_

After what could only have been a few minutes, but felt like an eternity, she stumbled onto the path to the enclave... and not a moment too soon. She could feel the poison burning through her veins, painful and dizzying. A few people looked up as she staggered closer, including Mission, and they all looked horrified as she saw her.

"Oh my God!" gasped Mission, rushing over. "Ash, you're hurt!"

Ashi tried to grin, but it came out as a grimace. "Yeah, a scratch," she mumbled. The next second, her legs gave out, and she fell to her knees, gasping for breath. "Heh… it's enough," she muttered wryly, finding a bitter irony in the situation as the girl knelt besides her.

It looked like Mission was yelling and glancing around desperately, but Ashi could only see her lips moving. It was as if she was watching from underwater, and the scene no longer actively involved her. Maybe she should have been afraid, since she was dying, but she hardly felt the pain any more. Everything was fading away into numbness. Was this really death? It was better than pain…

For a moment, she saw a Jedi that looked suspiciously like Bastila bending over her, and then cold and dark overwhelmed her. Strength and will utterly gone, Ashi's eyes slipped closed.

* * *

_It was dark._

_She paced back and forth in the cold, dusty chamber, shadowy robes swishing behind her, her lips curling into a slow smile underneath her mask. The dark side was thick in the air here; she could practically taste it. By her side, Malak voiced her thoughts. _

"_The dark side is strong in this place," he said with a smile, raising a hand to gesture to the air around them. "I can feel its power." The hand clenched into a fist, and the muscles in his arm rippled. She couldn't help her grin widening further. He was so alluring, strong as he was. They were both so strong now._

_The thought brought her back to attention. They were strong, maybe, but they had to be stronger. They would need the strength to overcome all those fools who called themselves the protectors of the galaxy: those senators who didn't really give a damn about anyone, and the Republic who was more interested in paperwork and manuals than real skill. _

_And then the Jedi: the hypocrites who had told them all along their duty was to protect the galaxy, and then tried to stop her from actually doing something. It had been almost tempting to let them fail, and serve them right; in a parallel galaxy she would have relished fighting with the Mandalorians. For all their fuss about their "Code", and their rules, what had it done for them? _She_ had saved the galaxy without any of their needless guidelines. Restraining people from their rightful destinies was practically a sin; that had to end.  
_

_The strength they needed end it was right beyond this doorway._

_She turned to the door, laying her hand against it. There was a complicated lock: nothing she couldn't stop, of course, but it would take her a moment. Malak hesitated as he watched her. The implications of their plan—which all at once seemed foolish and impetuous—crashed down upon him unexpectedly; he sucked in a suddenly needed breath. _

"_Is this wise?" he asked. "The ancient Jedi sealed this archway." They both knew that his question referred to more than just opening the door._

_She stopped. Her weight shifted slightly, her head tilted a little bit. A stranger would have noticed nothing, but Malak, who knew her best, sensed her subtle change in temper, even without her face to read any more. _

"_You doubt me?" she asked, her voice quiet and dangerous.  
_

_He immediately froze, his face half worried, and mostly insulted. "Of course not," he said, his voice so full of loyalty that she knew she could never really doubt him. "I would follow you anywhere, Revan, you know that. But if we pass beyond this door, we can never go back."_

"_Would you want to?"_

_The next moment, just as he was about to say 'of course not', the lock clicked and the door slid open with a wave of her hand. She walked without hesitation into the final room. _

"_Are the secrets of the Star Forge so valuable?" Malak asked from behind her. "Can its power truly be worth the risk?" _

_But he followed her, like she knew he would. And in front of them, the map lit up…

* * *

_

Ashi's eyes snapped open, and she gasped in a breath. It took a couple moments to realize it had been a dream, but then she relaxed, taking in her surroundings. She was in a small, plain room, lying on an uncomfortable bunk. A nearby window was open, and she could see rolling auburn fields through it. Right, this was Dantooine. What else would there be?

There was also no one else in the room. She found that somewhat offensive. Here she was, poisoned more than half to death by an overgrown spider, and no one saw fit to watch over her, maybe wringing their hands a little or something?

_Oh, space. The kinrath attack._ Her hand flew to her shoulder, and she winced as she ran her fingers along an angry red gash. That was going to leave a scar. Carefully, leaning against the wall, she pulled herself up into a sitting position. Her stomach lurched unpleasantly, and she lifted a hand to her forehead against an unexpected flood of dizziness.

"Whoa, blood rush," she murmured to herself.

The next moment, someone entered the room. Ashi glanced up, surprised to see Carth, followed by an anxious-looking Mission. They looked equally surprised to see her. "Hey, guys," she croaked, her voice hoarse from lack of use.

Mission reacted first, giving a squeal of joy and rushing across the room to hug Ashi tightly. Ashi returned the embrace, feeling Mission's tangible joy and relief. Finally, the younger girl pulled away, swiping quickly at her eyes, where a few involuntary tears had welled up. Ashi grinned.

"Miss me, kid?"

Mission suddenly glared. "Okay, don't ever do that again! That was so scary, Ash, when you, like, collapsed—all bloody and stuff, right? You freaked me out! We didn't know if you were gonna pull through or not, and Z was all worried, 'cause he's got the lifedebt, right, and that's real big, and then Bastila was even more uptight, so I think she was upset, and even Candy…"

She stopped as Ashi broke into laughter. "_Candy?_"

"Yeah, well, Canderous Ordo is such a mouthful now we're all travel buddies, you know? So he's Candy, right? Anyway, he was being all gruff, but he was pretty sure you'd be okay because he was all 'she's a warrior. She'll be fine.'"

"Glad to know you all care," Ashi smiled. "Was I out long?"

Mission shrugged. "Like, two days, which was plenty of time for us to be freaked, trust me. I'm so glad you're okay." She paused, and then added, "You know, I better go tell them all that you're not dead. Bye, Ash." As her back was to Carth, she winked conspiratorially. /I'll leave you two alone./

Ashi rolled her eyes, and, as Mission turned to leave, shoved her lightly with the Force. Mission glared at Ashi, who was suddenly looking all too innocent, and shook her head. "Worse than Bastila," she muttered as she left.

Ashi's eyes stayed on the door, and she grinned absently. "She's a good kid," she murmured slowly, and then glanced up at Carth. "What about you, flyboy? Were you worried about me?"

Carth shrugged. "You mean, when Mission comes running up to me, yelling about you and death and a hell of a lot of blood? Yes. But..." He shrugged. "I knew you'd be okay. You wouldn't let yourself be killed by a… a... what was it, anyway?"

Ashi grinned, despite herself. "The biggest goddamn kinrath you've ever seen, that's what," she replied, stretching her arms out to imply massive size.

"A _kinrath_?" He didn't bother to his his skepticism.

"No, really. This was a hive kinrath. Four times my size, and he had these evil red eyes, and massive fangs. Vicious," she added, for emphasis, but then stopped. Carth was frowning at her. "_What?_"

"You took on a hive kinrath by yourself?" She shrugged coolly, and he looked stunned. "What were you thinking? You could have been killed! You nearly were," he pointed out.

Ashi tilted her head to the side, smiling impishly. "Would you be very upset if I died, flyboy?"

"I don't know," Carth grinned. "Very is such a strong word…" Ashi cracked a smile, but then he frowned. "Look, you almost died, Ashi. It's not just a thing where you can say 'but I didn't.' Next time, you might not be so lucky."

Ashi scowled. "All right, one," she snapped, holding up a hand. "I am gifted with luck, it's a smuggler thing. So don't worry about that. Two, flyboy, I've been looking after myself for a long time. And three," she continued, listing reasons on her fingers, "I think I fought the damn kinrath on my own, thanks very much."

"How?" asked Carth, before he could stop himself.

"Kinrath barbeque, that's what," she said smugly. "I fried that overgrown bug."

Carth smiled appreciatively, but it faded uncertainly. "But... isn't that a dark side power?"

Ashi stopped, and then frowned as well. "Hey… I think it is." She saw his face, and held up her hands quickly. "Hey, calm down. I'm not going Sith. I didn't even know I could do that." Her mouth twisted ruefully. "Although I think discovering that I could had something to do with the fact that the monster had just given me this," she added, pointing at her wound. Carth winced, despite himself. "Maybe you can excuse me if I kind of got a little annoyed then, flyboy. Almost dying can do that to you.

"But hey," she added, her tone changing quickly, "that power still saved my life. I don't have to ever use it again. If I hadn't found it then, though, I'd be his lunch, and you guys would all miss me and stuff."

"Well, it would be a lot quieter around here," Carth muttered dryly. Ashi rolled her eyes, and he felt a sudden whack on the side of his head. He glared, rubbing it, as she laughed. "I think you're misusing those powers of yours, beautiful."

"Oh, you haven't seen any—" Ashi began, but was cut off sharply as Bastila burst into the room, out of breath.

"You're awake!" she gasped. "I mean, erm... good. I have something I must discuss something with you."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Actually, if that's the case, I'm sure I can pass out again."

Bastila sighed, looking exasperated, which made Ashi smile. "This is important, Ashi. Could you at least try to be serious?" snapped the younger Jedi. "The Force has given me…" she paused dramatically, "a _vision_."

Ashi's eyes widened with false excitement. "A vision?" she exclaimed, clapping her hands to her cheeks. "A real fracking vision?" Her voice became abruptly serious. "Why don't you go tell the masters, or, you know, someone who cares?"

Bastila shook her head insistently. "This is something I must discuss with you." She paused, and then added, with a pointed look at Carth, "Only you."

Carth frowned, and Ashi voiced his thoughts. "I wouldn't do that," she warned, shaking her head. "Republic kind of has issues with being left out of the loop."

He looked annoyed, but didn't deny it. "Whatever you have to tell Ashi, you can say in front of me."

"I'm sorry, Carth," said Bastila, with a tone that was probably supposed to be sympathetic, "but this is a Jedi matter." Ashi winced theatrically and muttered 'ouch', but they both ignored her. Finally Carth sighed, and, muttering under his breath, left the room. Bastila nodded approvingly. "The masters are coming also."

Ashi sagged. "Can't I go with Carth?"

"No," said Bastila firmly, and before Ashi could complain, the Council entered in all their senile glory.

"Padawan," said Vandar. "What is this urgent news you have for us?"

Bastila took a deep breath. "I believe that Ashi and I have shared a vision of Revan and Malak."

Ashi did a double take. "That dream? You saw that too?" Then she frowned. "How'd you know I saw it?"

"I sensed your presence," Bastila said vaguely, and Ashi rolled her eyes. The brat had probably practiced that line. Then, another aspect of them sharing a vision occurred to her, and her face grew horrified.

"Wait… you're in my _head_? And when did that fracking happen?"

"I… I am not sure," Bastila mumbled. She looked suddenly nervous, and Ashi frowned; Bastila was a terrible liar. Vandar, however, jumped in to save her, holding up a small green hand in his usual dignified way.

"Do you remember much about the kinrath attack, Ashi?"

She shrugged. "I don't know—it attacked me from behind, I killed it but not before it poisoned me, I went back to the enclave… It all gets a little hazy after that. I think that's a side effect of near-death experiences."

"So you do not remember that Bastila was the one to save you?" Surprised, Ashi shook her head. "It is my belief that a bond this has formed. In saving your life, she had joined the two of you."

Vandar said all of this convincingly, but Ashi didn't miss the Councils' conspiratorial looks. She felt out of a loop that she hadn't known had even been there. "Wait, wait, wait," she interrupted. "Bastila saved me, so now we're just suddenly… connected?"

"Bonds often develop between Jedi after certain significant events," Dorak added. "And we believe it is not so much that you are in each others' heads, as that you can sense the emotions and sensations of the other. Nothing specific, except that you seem to be sharing visions."

Ashi nodded slowly. "So Bastila and I have a bond, and we can sense each other, to some extent. Right?"

The masters nodded, and she grimaced. "This is seriously demented."

Vrook made his typical 'I just ate a lemon' face. "Well, if you can manage to put aside your personal distastes, perhaps we can discuss the _slightly_ more pressing matter of your vision."

Ashi glared. _He _didn't have to share a bond with a self-centered, highly obnoxious Jedi preacher. Then again, he was one anyway...

"You say you were in the ruins?" asked Dorak. "This is odd. Ee have believed for a long time that they were simply an ancient Jedi burial ground. But if Revan and Malak found something there, perhaps it would be wise if you went to explore them."

"As soon as possible, Padawan," added Vandar.

"Well," Ashi shrugged, "if I can go get backup, we can go right away. I assume that Bastila will be inviting herself?" She looked around, and then answered her own question. "Okay. Meet me in the courtyard in twenty minutes, and we'll go exploring."

* * *

Ashi had meant to find Carth and Canderous straight away, but she was distracted by something too good to miss. Just as she entered the courtyard, she saw the droid woman from a few days ago, flirting. This was not the shocking thing—_that_ was that it was with a human farmer and not one of the enclave droids.

She sidled closer, and the man caught sight of her. "What do you want?"

"Calm down, Samnt," said the droid woman, laying a hand on his arm. Ashi bit her lip to hide her surprise. "If it weren't for this Jedi, we wouldn't have met. Actually..." She paused. "I need to talk to her. I'll catch up to you in a moment."

Samnt shrugged, appeased, and meandered away. The woman turned to Ashi. "My name is Elise. I don't know yours."

"Ashi."

"Well. Ashi. I feel I must thank you. I was… well, I must have come off badly the other day."

Tactfully, Ashi didn't reply.

"I... I was much too attached to the droid. It was all I had of my dead husband, you see," Elise continued. "I thought that through the droid, my husband could live again—be with me still." Ashi raised her eyebrows skeptically, and Elise sighed.. "I suppose I went too far... but it's all right now. You see, in my grief I came back here, and ran into Samnt, a most _fascinating_ man."

Curiously, Ashi scrutinized Samnt, who was busy scratching himself. He looked like all the other hundred farmers she had seen so far. "Meh, I've seen better."

Elise's eyes narrowed suddenly. "Oh. Well, we don't all like bright orange flight jackets."

Ashi's mouth dropped open, and for a moment she was lost for words. Then she smirked. "Told Samnt about your droid yet?"

Elise scowled and spun on her heel. "Come on, Samnt," she said, grabbing the man's arm. Ashi watched after them distractedly.

_I don't _like_ orange flight jackets_, she thought. _It just… works on him_.

Then sense caught up with her, and she quickly shook off the thought and hurried away.

* * *

Bastila made a disapproving face when Ashi reappeared after half an hour with Carth and Canderous in tow. "If you are _quite_ ready," she snapped, and Ashi nodded. It seemed stupid to annoy her if they were joined now... unless, of course, it was absolutely necessary.

They made their way to the ruins, and nervously entered. The whole place was eerie, all dark stone and shadows, and normally it was a place Ashi would avoid. She could deal with bad atmospheres, but this was more than that. It was a kind of uncanny darkness.

Bastila either thought the same, or read her mind. "I can sense the dark side in this place. We had best be careful."

Canderous rolled his eyes. "I don't think I need a safety lecture, Princess," he said, prompting a glare from the Jedi.

"Calm down, _Princess_," Ashi agreed. "Remember, there is no emotion, there is…" She paused, and then grinned. "What is there? Serenity?" Although she did know, frighteningly well, it was fun winding Bastila up.

"Peace!" she shrieked. "You are a _Jedi_! How in the name of the Force can you not know _peace_?"

"Ah, yes. Because you seem so very peaceful."

Bastila took a deep, irritated breath. "I will never know how you became a Jedi."

"Well, the Force works in mysterious ways."

Bastila looked disgusted at the abuse of her favorite quote, but before she could respond, Ashi turned and headed down into the ruins. The unnatural chill in the air got more intense as she approached the stone door. Bastila rushed after her, and Carth and Canderous followed at a slight distance. Arriving first, the Jedi tried to open the door as she reached it, but to her surprise, she couldn't.

"It appears to have been sealed using the Force. Perhaps Revan and Malak did this after searching it," she speculated. "Anyway, we will not be able to…" Her voice trailed off, as Ashi stepped forward again. "Ashi, I said, you will not be able…"

She stopped, stunned. Ashi had reached out to pick the lock, but the moment she touched it, the door slid open with a grating noise. Ashi grinned, surprised but nonetheless pleased.

"I'm such a genius," she muttered.

"You only _touched_ it!" Bastila objected.

Ashi smirked. "Still a genius," she replied, and beckoned to Canderous and Carth. "Come on—let's go find out what's so damn important."

The inside of the ruins was dark and chiling. Their footsteps left imprints in a thick layer of dust on the floor: it was clear that no one had been here in a very long time. Ashi felt loud as she moved softly but purposefully towards the next door. Again, she touched it gently, and it sprung open. An ancient-looking droid sat on the other side of it, whirring quietly as she came closer. Quite suddenly, it warbled in a language that Ashi neither could speak, nor had she ever heard.

"What? I don't understand you."

The droid stopped, clicked a few times, and then replied in a completely different and unfamiliar language. Ashi shook her head. "I think it's broken," she said as the others approached. "It doesn't seem to speak any language I know."

/I speak all languages of the slaves of the Builders/ the droid contradicted in a new and strangely damp-sounding language. Ashi jumped.

"That's Selkath," she observed. "But a really old dialect. How the hell does a droid in a crypt on Dantooine know ancient Selkath?"

"Well, we don't," said Canderous. "Want to tell us what it's saying?"

"Crap, that's what," Ashi shrugged. "Probably been in a tomb too long. What's your purpose, droid?"

/I am the protector of the secrets of the Star Forge. I guard its power against the unworthy. I release the secrets of the Star Forge to those who have proved themselves deserving/ explained the droid, rather elusively.

"You guard this place? Like, a combat droid?" Her friends looked nervous, and Ashi saw Carth reach for his blaster.

/I am not programmed for combat. If those who seek to know of the Star Forge are unworthy, they will be destroyed by the power of the Star Forge itself. Such is the way the Builders have made it./

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Space, this thing could rival you Jedi in elusive foresight. But it's not dangerous, Carth—you can let go of your blaster." Carth looked embarrassed, and Canderous smirked. "Okay, droid," said Ashi, "who're the Builders?"

/The builders are the masters of the galaxy. They are the rulers of all they survey and the creators of the Star Forge./

Canderous looked bored by now, and disappointed that there was nothing to shoot yet, but Bastila waited expectantly. Ashi sighed and relayed the words back to them. "Apparently, they're also very modest," she added, and the Jedi scowled.

"Ask them when the Builders created it. It seems," she added grudgingly, "that it only responds to you."

Ashi nodded. "How long ago were you created, droid?"

The droid replied, and Ashi's mouth dropped open. "It says about ten thousand years before the beginning of the Republic. And all that time, it hasn't seen a single one of these Builders. It also keeps mentioning something called a Star Forge. What's that?" she asked, her question now directed to the droid.

/The Star Forge/ the droid explained proudly, /is the pinnacle of the Builders' empire, the apex of their rule. It is a source of incredible power that can crush the souls of weaker beings and allows the Builders to dominate with an iron fist./

Ashi sighed impatiently. "You can't maybe be a little more specific?"

The droid hesitated. /The… the Star Forge is the pinnacle of the Builders' empire, the apex of their rule. It is a source of incredible power that can crush the souls of weaker beings and allows the Builders to dominate with an iron fist./

Ashi turned to her friends, and recited what the droid had said. "But it doesn't know anything else. I think, if we want to find out anything useful, we won't get it from this scrap heap. Droid," she said, "how do we find out about the Star Forge?"

/In the rooms on either side of you are your tests. You must succeed in these if you desire to prove yourselves worthy. If you do not, you will be destroyed by the power of the Star Forge itself. If you do prove yourselves worthy, you may proceed through the final door to gain the knowledge you seek./

Ashi sighed, and turned to her companions. "There's dangerous things behind the doors on the right and left. We kill them and then pass some kind of test. If we do all that right, then we get to go through the big door," she gestured to the door behind her, "and find out all about this Star Forge. Cool?"

"If we don't prove ourselves worthy?" asked Bastila nervously.

"We die," replied Ashi brightly. "So, you know, we'll just try not to do that. Flyboy, you're with me. Brat and Ordo, you're together. Try not to kill each other."

Ignoring Bastila's expression of disgust, especially when Canderous cocked his repeating blaster and made to kick down the door, Ashi led Carth through the door on the right. It opened, allowing them through, and then slammed behind them. It was pitch black in the room, and rubble was everywhere, including one place where it seemed the ceiling had caved in. Like the entire rest of the ruins, the air was stale and musty.

Ashi pulled out her lightsaber and flicked it on, scattering the shadows. "Come out, come out, power of the Star Forge."

A red light flickered on, just beyond her range of immediate vision. The next moment, blaster fire exploded from that direction. Ashi reacted instantly, deflecting the bolts off her lightsaber, and then charged for it. As they came closer, she and Carth saw the thing that had fired at her. It was a large, dark droid, built in a slightly spidery way, and looked a bit like a large metal kinrath. Ashi disliked it immediately. This was a violent version of the droid they had spoken to. "Ion blaster," Ashi shouted.

Carth shot a couple bolts as the droid, and one of its gun exploded. "Good aim," she remarked, and then held up a hand. A rush of energy blew from her palm, and the droid stopped, paralyzed. Ashi rushed up and struck a spinning blow to it, causing the entire main body to explode in a rush of fire, sparks, and smoke.

She smiled, and twirled her lightsaber, deactivating and pocketing it in a single movement.

"Showoff."

"You're just jealous," she replied, and headed to the back of the room, where she came across a computer. Carth watched, impressed, as she managed to hack it enough to break the seal of the door. They heard a grinding noise, and left the dark room, meeting a sullen Bastila and Canderous in the main hall. Ashi ignored them, and turned to the final doorway.

"This was the place in the vision," she said to Bastila. It was not a question. The younger Jedi nodded, and Ashi slowly stepped through it into the last room.

In front of her, a strange device split into three sections, like some kind of sinister flower opening, and a ball levitated from the center, emanating a milky light. When it was floating directly in between the three sections, it stopped and hummed lightly, and a spherical map appeared from it. Ashi stepped closer uncertainly.

"What's this?"

"It's… a star map," said Carth from behind. He walked up next to her, gesturing to the map. "This is our galaxy. Look, there's Kashyyyk, and then that's Tatooine, and Manaan, and there's Korriban," he muttered, pointing to four planets that shone brighter than the rest. "But there's data missing: incomplete hyperspace coordinates, corrupted information, things like that."

Unexpectedly, Ashi's face glazed over. "Those planets," she said, "they've got maps like this one. If we find them all, then we can piece together the destination—I figure that's the Star Forge."

Carth frowned. "You think?"

Ashi looked puzzled. "I… no, I _know_," she replied. "That's what we have to do." She sounded so certain he couldn't argue. "Come on," Ashi sighed. "Guess we better go tell the Jedi what we found. Come on, guys. Permission not to come granted, Ordo," she added, sensing without seeing the look of distaste on Canderous's face. True to form, he peeled off as soon as they left the ruins. Meanwhile, the rest of them headed back to the enclave.

* * *

Ashi was not surprised when the Jedi decided they had to 'discuss' their new discovery, and went off to explore the fields. When she returned, they were looking even more serious than usual, which she took to be a bad sign.

"Padawan, your discovery is indeed serious," began Dorak. "The Council believes that the Star Forge, whatever it is, is something that may have led to the success of Revan and Malak. On the four planets mentioned, we agree that there will be four more maps. If you travel to all four planets, you may be able to find all the Star Maps, and find the location of the Star Forge."

Ashi frowned. "You're sending _me_ to go look for the maps? Why?"

"You have excelled in your training. We believe that you are best suited to this task," replied Vandar. He didn't actually answer her question, but Ashi ignored it. No one could understand how the minds of Jedi worked.

"Does that mean I can leave?"

"As soon as possible," Dorak nodded.

Ashi smiled. "Okay: find the Star Maps; stop Malak; save the galaxy. No problem. Anything else?"

/Juhani has asked to accompany you. After deliberation, the Council agreed to grant her request. We believe that her presence will serve as a reminder of the everlasting threat of the dark side to even the most loyal of Jedi./ Zhar paused, and then added /Do not fail, Padawan. The entire fate of the galaxy may rest in your hands./

_But no pressure_, thought Ashi dryly.

"We only hope you are up to the task," added Vrook nastily. Ashi resisted the urge to roll her eyes until her back was turned and she had left the chamber. She didn't bow.

* * *

She managed to get together most of the crew in a short amount of time, and they all boarded the ship. The last one she found was Carth. He accepted the news quietly, with a slight frown, and then followed her to the Hawk.

Ashi was surprised by his silence. "You've been really quiet lately," she remarked, as they walked through the enclave. "What's up?"

"Have I?" It came out sharp and bitter. "Well, I suppose I just don't like being left out of the loop."

She grinned. "You were born out of the loop."

Carth cracked a reluctant smile. "Cute. Any cuter, and you'd pass for a Gammorean's sister."

"Better than a Gammorean's mother."

He laughed, but then sighed. "Really, though, kidding aside. I feel like I'm being left out of this. There's all this talk about 'Jedi business', and I'm stuck not knowing anything."

"No one's trying to leave you out of the loop, flyboy," Ashi said carefully. She could see him getting worked up, and had a nasty feeling about where this was going: he had the familiar mistrustful look from Taris that she'd hoped he had gotten past.

"Well, then what are you trying to do?" he demanded. "The Jedi are just taking you in there and ranting about Star Maps and secret missions, and no one will tell me what the hell is going on!" He stopped walking, and turned to her. "I mean, look at you. You're a neophyte Padawan who's been saddled with the responsibility of saving the galaxy. That's not normal, Ashi!"

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "I'm a very good neophyte Padawan," she offered.

Carth stared. "That's totally besides the point!"

"But still true. Look, I don't exactly value the opinions of the Council, but they think I can do this. Why isn't their faith in me enough?" She scowled challengingly. "Do you think that I can't handle this, is that it?"

"I'm sure you can," he replied, and she was surprised by the genuine sincerity in his tone. "But this isn't something that the Jedi do. They never act quickly, or without thinking things through in multiple scenarios. And now they're just sending you off to save the galaxy?" He shook his head. "There's something going on here. And I'm not in on it."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Space, flyboy! No one is plotting behind your back! Can you try to imagine, just for a moment, that maybe the entire galaxy _isn't _out to get you?" Her tone was laced with frustration.

Carth's eyes flashed dangerously. Ashi imagined, for a moment, she could almost see the memories behind them. "But you are all talking behind my back," he growled. "And you know what? I am not going to sit around and wait to be betrayed again."

The expression on Ashi's face brought to mind the phrase 'if looks could kill', and if the case were such, Carth didn't doubt he'd be dead several times over. "No one's not out to get you!" she exclaimed. "You're not worth the goddamn trouble." His face stayed impassive, making her even angrier. "Why can't you get that I'm not betraying you? I'm _not _Saul!"

"Well, we'll just see about that, won't we?"

Ashi froze, stunned. "Hell, no! You know what we'll see about? We'll see if I decide to leave you here or not, if you're going to be such a bastard about all this! That would be nice, huh?" she added, a spiteful grin appearing on her face. "We'll go save the galaxy, and you can stay here. I bet that another ship will come by for you… eventually."

Smugly, she turned her back on him and began to walk away, counting silently. _Five… four… three… two…_

"Wait!"

She smirked. "Yes?"

"Don't leave," he sighed. "I'm sorry. I just… I'm not going to trust easily, Ashi. You have to accept that."

"I'm not very good at accepting things I don't like," she said. "Especially bitchy Republic soldiers. You're going to have to deal with this if you plan to come. Or I could drop you at a Republic outpost somewhere. Let you go kill a couple hundred Sith or something." She shrugged. "Would that be better?"

Carth paused for a moment, and then shook his head, looking surprisingly sure. "No. I want to come."

He felt suddenly, irrationally nervous, as Ashi scrutinized him, and then even more irrational gladness as she finally nodded.

"So come on," she said. "Everyone's waiting, and the sooner we get out of here, the better. And don't think you're forgiven or anything," she added over her shoulder as she turned away.

He grimaced, and nodded—it was probably more than he deserved anyway—and followed her onto the ship. A minute later, the Ebon Hawk's engines ignited, and with a smooth hiss that still made Ashi grin with satisfaction, the ship rose and soared away into the darkening sky.

* * *

**Okay. So maybe I exaggerated the hive kinrath a little bit. But it would be a lot cooler if it was that big. Kashyyyk is up next--if you have any requests for side quests and stuff, let me know and I'll try to work it in. R&R, as always ;)_  
_**


	10. Corrupt

**Okay, so it's been a little while. I have a completely legit excuse--namely, a near-death experience at camp: falling three feet and landing on my head, on a rock--so I feel no guilt. The good news is, it made my day to get back from 2 weeks in the woods to find all the reviews. Thanks to everyone who wrote one! ;)**

**Anyway, here's what you really want to read (hopefully): chapter 1 of Kashyyyk...**

**Disclaimer: don't own anything  


* * *

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**Corrupt: morally twisted, depraved; tainted

* * *

**

"Who the hell is firing on my ship?"

Ashi stumbled into the cockpit and glared fiercely at Carth and Bastila, demanding an answer. The glare was mostly directed at him—their argument was hardly forgotten—and he didn't meet her gaze as he answered.

"Squadron of Sith fighters, coming in hard." His hands flew over the controls, a vain attempt to stabilize the ship. "I've got to get the hyperspace coordinates in. We need someone on the blaster turrets."

There was a pause, and then Ashi sighed.

"Yes, I'll do it. You're welcome," she muttered, and hurried out, swearing as the jolt of blaster fire sent the ship careening to the side. She slipped into the gun seat and pulled on the vision goggles, flipping them to heat sensitive; six red spots, the fiery engines of the fighters, appeared in her line of vision. A glare spread across her face as one fighter wheeled and flew overhead, firing on the top of the Ebon Hawk. Spinning and locking onto the ship, she fired off several shots, and the Sith exploded in a blaze of fire and shrapnel.

She grinned, satisfied, but it was short-lived. An unexpected burst of static from the comm filled her ears. "What, Carth? Better be important."

"What planet?" he asked.

"Come again?"

"What planet are we going to?" he repeated, slightly more impatiently.

"Figure it out, can't you? I'm a little busy." As if to accentuate her point, she caught a third ship in her fire, and it blew up in an especially large explosion. The next second, there was a rush of static and a couple thumps, and then a different voice, accented and preachy, came over the comm. Ashi rolled her eyes.

"We need to get the hyperspace coordinates in," said Bastila, speaking very slowly. "Which planet do we go to?"

"I don't know!" Ashi exclaimed, flinching as a Sith fired; the red bolts hit the top of the ship, narrowly missing her. She spun in her seat, but couldn't get a lock on the offending fighter; this pilot was better than the idiots she had been dealing with a moment ago. She swore at him. "Uh… Kashyyyk. We're going to Kashyyyk."

She could almost see the brat frowning upon her hasty choice, but as she tried to object, Ashi cut her off. "We're _going_ to _Kashyyyk_," she insisted, and her tone told Bastila not to argue. The Jedi murmured an agreement, and Ashi refocused her attention on the fighters. The remaining two were obviously the only ones with any skill, but skill made people cocky—she would know. A grin crept onto her face. They had both gotten careless, and it wasn't hard to trick one and then shoot down the other. She picked up the communicator and called, unable to keep a note of satisfaction out of her voice, "Got 'em. Ready to go hyperspace whenever you are."

The next second, Carth replied by flipping the final switch, and the stars around her blurred as it moved into a speed no ship in the galaxy could supposedly match. Ashi stood and climbed out of the turret, turning for the cockpit, but with no warning, her head spun suddenly. The ground suddenly tilted under her, and everything went dark…

_She was in a small ship, the size of an escape pod, if more maneuverable. Mandalorian and Republic fighters alike swarmed around. With a jolt, she concluded that she was in the middle of an inter-space dogfight, and she seemed to be a Republic ship. Not exactly Ashi's home turf, but Red wasn't worried. Wheeling, she locked onto a fighter behind her and shot it down in a single blast. More Mandalorians tried to follow her, but she blasted them away, unworried. The next moment, she spoke sharply into a comm headset._

"_Formation alpha, green squadron," she instructed. "Blue squadron, hang back and look for openings. If you see one, take it. Red squadron, follow my lead."_

_Ashi only had time to register puzzlement and dry humor—very clever; _Red_ squadron—before the scene changed. Suddenly she was getting out of her ship and striding out of the hangar amidst a crowd of Republic soldiers, all of them staring at her and whispering in an awed sort of way. She heard one of them murmur, "Damn, did you see her fly?" _

_She moved through the crowd, not needing to shove: they parted in front of her. And then suddenly Alek was there. Seeing him made Red's face light up into a grin, and even Ashi couldn't help relief at something familiar. He smiled at her, slipping one of his hands into hers and caressing her cheek lightly with the thumb of the other._

"_Nice flying there, love," he murmured, and she felt a small cut on her face vanish with a light tingle as he ran his fingertips over it. She nodded, and smiled up at him, an extremely satisfied expression that he mirrored._

"_It has begun," she said, and then the setting blurred and faded to black…_

Her eyes flicked open. She was leaning against the wall, head spinning, but it seemed nothing had happened. In fact, the visions were beginning to feel almost routine—even if that probably wasn't a good thing.

Well. She couldn't do anything about it anyway, and if she was going to have sudden visions, she might as well be lying down. Ashi made her way to the sleeping quarters, but to her disappointment, she wasn't about to get any rest. Bastila was there as well, and as Ashi came in, she asked, "Ashi? Could I ask you a few questions?"

Ashi was immediately suspicious. "What kind of questions?"

"Nothing intrusive, don't worry. Just a few simple questions to get to know you better." Ashi's eyes narrowed skeptically; she doubted that Bastila had just decided that they should be friends. Still, she said nothing, and the Jedi took it as a yes. "Very well. Where are you from?"

"Deralia," Ashi said, without looking at her. "It's in a remote system." Most people hadn't heard of her planet, small and remote as it was, but Ashi had vague memories of it—vague, of course, being the key word. She hadn't lived there long; the Mandalorians had attacked it at the beginning of the war, when she was younger than Mission was now. That had been about when she had decided to make a run for it, and fled to a nearby city planet, a would-be Nar Shaddaa where her childhood had ended with the beginning of her smuggling career.

But she wasn't going to tell the brat all that, so she added simply, "But I didn't live there very long."

Bastila nodded mysteriously, trying to look wise, and at least succeeding in looking thoughtful. "What is your position with the Republic fleet?"

"Not in it. I'm a freelance transporter of prohibited goods."

"A smuggler," Bastila corrected with a frown.

Ashi shook her head. "No, that makes me sound like a criminal."

"But you are!" Bastila objected.

"Criminals are bad. I'm a relatively good person with moral deficiencies."

Ashi said this so firmly that it almost sounded believable. Bastila paused a moment to look unconvinced, and then continued. "And how old are you?"

"3258," replied Ashi immediately. "Healthy living, you know." There was a pause, and then she sighed. "You have no sense of humor. Twenty-eight. Wasn't that on my service records?"

Bastila bit her lip. "Um… well, yes. All of this was, in fact. I was more interested in how you would answer."

"Yeah?" Ashi raised her eyebrows. "Find out anything interesting, princess?"

Bastila paused. What she had in fact found out was that Ashi sincerely believed the memories they had given her, but she wasn't going to tell her that. "Well, you were honest, which is good. And… you answered them seriously, which is good as well. You treated this like the serious matter it is."

Ashi stared. "_Serious_? Space, brat, you must be rubbing off on me. Serious…" She shook her head, and then rolled over. Bastila could take a hint, and kept quiet, letting Ashi finally fall asleep.

* * *

Malak entered the bridge of his ship with a scowl on his gray face. His storming walk, combined with his cape flying dramatically, incited flinches from the officers; he noted that with smugness, but it was overshadowed by his annoyance. Over two months, and still no word of the Jedi brat. He suspected she and her crew had fled to Dantooine, but he'd be damned if he could attack them there. And yet she had to leave at some time… but when?

He was interrupted from his thoughts by a slight cough from his admiral. He gave Saul a small glance of acknowledgement, a glare that clearly demanded, _what?_ Saul spoke nervously.

"Lord Malak, the Star Forge is operating at 200% capacity—far beyond out expectations."

Malak nodded briskly. This was, after all, good, but he couldn't find as much interest in it as in Bastila. Besides, the Star Forge, his master weapon he had found with Revan, still brought back memories, some of them painful. He shook his head sharply—such thoughts were unfitting for a Sith Lord—and then returned his gaze to Saul.

"I am more interested in the Jedi, Bastila," he said, his voice carrying an edge. "Has there been any word of her?"

The nervous expression on Saul's face brightened slightly, evidently at the thought of having news to give at last. "Lord Malak, we have heard about her. An informant who saw Bastila Shan on Taris was able to identify her companions for us as well. She was accompanied by Carth Onasi, a decorated war hero for the Republic."

His voice grew imperceptibly pained as he spoke of Carth. He had been a good soldier, and Saul had been fond of him, in his own way. It had been difficult when Carth had refused to join him, back when he first turned to side with Revan. If only the damn boy had come along, there might not have been so much trouble with Telos, and they certainly would have won more of the battles.

Malak caught the mixed resentfulness and nostalgia in Saul's tone. "You knew this man?"

Saul's eyes widened, and he backtracked carefully. "He served under me during the Mandalorian Wars. I was something of a mentor to him." Malak looked appeased, and Saul switched topics quickly, before he said something stupid. "He is a determined soldier and a good fighter. It would explain much of Bastila's success to be traveling with such a man." The Sith Lord, who had been surveying the bridge and the view of the galaxy through the window, nodded thoughtfully.

"Yes, it would," he agreed, but he still sounded skeptical. It would have been near impossible to get off Taris, and somehow, he didn't think Bastila had only had Onasi. "Who was this informant, Admiral?"

Saul gestured to one of the doors leading to the bridge, and it opened. A small man, dressing in blue and wearing a distinctive white hat, entered. He was made to look more dangerous that he might first appear, however, by the many guns and explosives he carried. Malak turned to face him, his eyebrows raised in vague curiosity.

"This is Calo Nord," said Saul, and the man in blue bowed. "He is an esteemed bounty hunter, and he saw the group while they were on Taris. We have… we have hired him to hunt down Bastila for us. Alive. I have instructed him not to be so careful with her companions."

"Indeed." Malak appraised the man aloofly. "And may I ask how he managed to escape the Taris bombing?" _Massacre,_ they all thought, though the word went unsaid.

Calo smirked. "With all due respect, Lord Malak, I'm difficult to kill."

Slowly, Malak smiled. "I think Mr. Nord appears to be exactly what we need," he said to Saul, by ways of congratulations, and the admiral breathed an inner sigh of relief. His relief was short-lived, however, when he realized this meant he now had to give Malak the other news.

"My Lord Malak," he said carefully, "there is one more thing. Might we have a word away from the ears of the _common_ soldiers?" He glanced around, implying all the Sith officers surrounding them who were trying to eavesdrop without looking like it.

Malak frowned. "I trust you are not wasting my time, Admiral."

Saul shook his head emphatically. "I think you will be very interested in what Nord has to tell us of Bastila's _other _companion."

They retreated to a different room, and bitterly, Calo Nord described the girl they had seen with Bastila, who had been involved in so many of the events on Taris. Throughout the story, Malak's half-metal face remained impassive, but his fingers tightened on the arm of his chair as the bounty hunter spoke, the knuckles whitening—the only visible sign of his shock. When Calo had finished, Malak quickly dismissed both of them, waving them out of the room so he could think.

It had to be. That would, of course, explain all their success on Taris, for there was no one who had ever been able to stand in her way. He would have liked to doubt it, to deny it, but Nord's description had been perfect. The hair, especially—he had never met anyone with hair quite like hers.

But she was calling herself Ashi now, and traveling with Bastila and a Republic hero… what might it all mean? A clever scheme on her part, like she had always seemed to have up her sleeve? Or had the Jedi succeeded in redeeming her? As they might call it, anyway—it was no redemption if she remembered the dark side no longer.

He smiled. He didn't care how dangerous Calo Nord might be; the bounty hunter stood no chance against her. But Malak would let him go… and he would follow her, and figure out what she was up to.

Leaning back, he closed his eyes, and spoke quietly to a nonexistent person.

"I've missed you, Revan."

* * *

The trip to Kashyyyk was fairly boring. Ashi was still angry with Carth and generally annoyed to Bastila, so she spent most of her time with Canderous. He was good company: eager to hear the story of the hive kinrath, and happy to practice sparring with her when there was free time. Carth didn't seem to approve of her spending so much time with the mercenary, but Ashi counted this as a perk. As far as she was concerned, Canderous was a friend, the kind she wouldn't have had since her solo career began. She enjoyed having him around—it was refreshing talking to someone straightforward.

Ashi also made an effort to try to talk to Juhani. The Cathar was incredibly sheepish after having attacked her in the grove on Dantooine, and no amount of Ashi telling her that it wasn't a big deal would ease the feeling. Ashi didn't consider herself very good at comforting people, but she made a half-attempt with Juhani. And, if nothing else, the Jedi was funny to have around, since she had absolutely no concept of sarcasm, albeit a temper remarkably like Ashi's.

They arrived at Kashyyyk the morning of the fourth day; Ashi was jarred from her sleep by the shudder as they entered the atmosphere. She frowned as she got out of bed and dressed; she had had an odd dream, and she suspected Bastila would want to talk about it.

She was right. The Jedi was waiting in the main room, and as Ashi walked in, still half-asleep, she leapt into action. "The Force has given us another vision," she said, and Ashi rolled her eyes.

"You saw it too, then?" She was referring to the dream they had both had, of the Star Map appearing in the dark forest. Bastila nodded. "It looked like it was on the forest floor," she continued slowly. "You think we'll have to go down into the Shadowlands?"

"Perhaps. Who knows," replied Bastila, which Ashi assumed was her way of saying, "Yes, you're right." She nodded and left the room, looking for a Wookiee. She found him quickly, following the smell.

"Hey, Z," she called, and he glanced up. "Want to help me out with this one?"

Zaalbar gazed down at her, looking reluctant. /I am not sure. I… I should not be here. I was exiled from Kashyyyk a long time ago; I was told never to return./

Ashi frowned. "Key phrase, 'a long time ago', though, right? Won't they let bygones be bygones or something?"

He paused, and then said slowly /I will come with you as a guide, because you ask. But… no. I am not sure I can tell you/ he said, his tone apologetic but set.

Ashi hesitated, debating trying to pry, and then shrugged. "Okay, Z. I'll let you be."

* * *

As soon as the ship was on the ground, Ashi was out the door, with Canderous at her heels and Zaalbar and Bastila trailing unenthusiastically behind. However, they had hardly stepped onto the shiny new platform that, incidentally, clashed horribly with the surrounding forest, when an Ithorian approached, wearing the Czerka colors and holding a clipboard.

/Hello, prospective customer, and welcome to Edean. I'm pleased to welcome you to this planet, although/ and here he paused and consulted his clipboard, /as your ship is not on our list of planned visitors, there will be a small docking fee of 100 credits./

Ashi frowned. "What's Edean? This is Kashyyyk."

The Ithorian shook his head. /That is the name the… locals call it by, this is true, but we decided that it would sound more welcoming to customers if it was renamed in a more pleasing name than the local animals have given it./

Zaalbar growled; it could not be said if it was at the word _animals_ or just at Czerka in general. /Have they no respect for my people?/

"Chill, Z," she said quickly. /I know he's filth. Ignore him./ The Wookiee nodded reluctantly, and the Ithorian cleared his throat.

/About that docking fee…/

Ashi smiled persuasively. "I don't really need to pay it, do I? I mean, if I don't, I'll just spend the money in your stores, right?" The alien nodded slowly, marveling at her impeccable logic. No one but Bastila saw the small twitch of her wrist that indicated a subtle use of the Force. She glared disapprovingly as the Czerka representative said a dazed goodbye, and then burst out talking as soon as he had left.

"That was a shameful act for a Jedi!" she exclaimed, and Ashi stared innocently. "You can't use the Force to avoid paying simple debts to people!"

"Well, what about Czerka slavers? Can I use it on them?"

That stopped Bastila in her tracks. "Slavers?"

Ashi snorted. "You'll see."

And Bastila did see, as they approached the gateway to the non-Czerka part of Kashyyyk. The guard ignored them, until Ashi made to open the huge wooden door. "Hey, you! You can't go through there!"

"Why not?"

He frowned in clear bewilderment, and paused for a moment, obviously not having anticipated an objection. "You're not Czerka," he decided finally. "So you're not allowed through. It's only Czerka representatives."

Zaalbar snarled. /Representatives, they say? He lies. They're slavers, they take my people and sell them into slavery!/

Even the guard could figure out he was angry. "Hey, keep your pet on a leash, sweetheart," he muttered.

"He's not a _pet_," Ashi snapped, "and I'm not a slaver, you idiot. It's called a lifedebt, though I doubt you've heard of it."

The guard laughed. "Oh, great—we got ourselves a Wookiee-lover. Nice, how you've found a way to make yourself so high and mighty. Lifedebt…" He snorted contemptuously.

/He slanders my lifedebt!/ roared Zaalbar, just as Ashi exclaimed, "You think I'm a filthy slaver like you? Do you want to repeat that, you Czerka rat?" She reached for her lightsaber.

"Don't!" Bastila shouted, grabbing Ashi's arm. Zaalbar and Canderous both looked disappointed, and the Mandalorian lowered his blaster sullenly.

Ashi shook off the Jedi, pulling out her lightsaber. "I won't," she replied, "if he lets me through right now and makes an attempt at growing a couple brain cells while I'm gone." The man looked about to object, but her ferocious expression stopped him.

"Fine," he muttered, stepping to the side. "But do us all a favor and get yourself killed by something out there, yeah, sweetheart?"

Ashi brushed his comment off and shoved open the gate. "Nice to meet you, too," she called back, as it slammed shut behind them. Canderous looked entertained.

"You just make friends wherever you go, don't you?"

"Until the galaxy runs out of people," grinned Ashi, setting off down the walkway.

They were now really in Kashyyyk, and it was immediately obvious. They could hear from all around the calls and chirps from the different animals. Wroshyr trees, miles high, surrounded them, fading from towering canopies of sun-speckled green to murky darkness at the bottom.

"Shadowlands," Ashi murmured as she glanced down. "The forest floor. I'd bet money that the map's there, brat. And there's lots of things to kill there, Ordo." They both nodded, one looking apprehensive and one pleased as he rested his hand on his huge blaster.

As it turned out, though, there was quite a lot to kill on the Great Walkway. It was invaded by swarms of kinrath that Ashi attacked with vindictive enthusiasm—evidently with the hive kinrath in mind. They also ran into a team of Dark Jedi, who didn't last very long past "Lord Malak was most displeased…" At that point, Ashi replied, "Yeah? Let's see how much this pleases him," and sent him flying off the walkway edge.

That wasn't the only less than desirable sight they came across. Around one corner, they found three men in Czerka uniforms, with a Wookiee corpse at their feet. One man was moaning in distress, but he didn't seem concerned about the Wookiee, so to speak. "This isn't good!" he groaned. "I can't afford this."

"You think I can?" his companion demanded. "Do you know what they get for a healthy one of these things?"

_Slavers_, Ashi realized. It didn't take a genius to work out what had happened.

"We'll work it out later," cut in a man in a light green uniform. "We've got company." He turned to Ashi. "What do you want, spacer? I'm Patrol Captain Denham, and you're interrupting Czerka Corporation business."

Ashi crossed her arms as she surveyed the scene. "Uh-huh. What happened here?"

He shrugged calmly. "This Wookiee slave got a little… rebellious. We had to put it down."

/You _put it down_?/ Zaalbar exploded. /We're not _animals_!/

"Do you realize what you've done?" Ashi demanded, voicing his anger. "That was a sentient creature! You just _murdered_ it!"

"Calm down," snapped the man. "It was only a slave—you have one too. Nice specimen," he added appreciatively, scrutinizing Zaalbar. "How much did you pay for that one?"

Ashi grinned suddenly. It was not a cheerful grin; conversely, it made the men suddenly very nervous. "He wasn't expensive," she replied slowly, "but that one's going to be." She gestured at the Wookiee on the ground. "Because you're going to pay for that with your lives."

"What the…?" the captain blustered. "Blasters ready, men. These fools want to die!"

But for his arrogance, he was no fighter, and Ashi, Zaalbar, and Canderous had taken down the group within a minute. Bastila was busy looking annoyed. "You can't go killing people everywhere you see," she said with irritation. "Even if they are slavers."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Watch me," she said flippantly, heading away.

They found the entrance to the Shadowlands, but annoying, a Wookiee was busy guarding it. /None can pass!/ he growled as they neared. /Unless you have permission from Chuundar, human, and I doubt that./

Zaalbar looked shocked at the name. /Chuundar? Why do they need his permission?/

The other Wookiee looked over at him, and then shook his furry head in shock. /Much has changed since you were last here, madclaw. Chuundar is the chieftain now. Perhaps you would know that if you were not _in exile_/ he added pointedly.

/I have sworn a lifedebt to this human. I will follow her wherever she may go./

The guard Wookiee shrugged. /Regardless, you must still go to Chuundar first. Although I don't know how glad he'll be to see you, madclaw. Go, human/ he said, waving a bowcaster, and Ashi nodded and backed away enough to appease him, before turning, glaring, to Zaalbar.

"What didn't you tell me?"

Zaalbar shook his head miserably. /I should not be here. When I left Kashyyyk last time, I was told never to return./

"Yeah, yeah; how tragic. _Why_, Zaalbar?"

He sighed. /Chuundar… he is my brother. Last time I was here, I found out he was dealing with slavers. I was so angry… I attacked him. With my claws/ he finished, staring down at his hands in shame.

"And am I to take it this is a big deal?"

Zaalbar shook his head despairingly. /You don't understand. To attack with my claws… we use our claws as tools. To use them instead as weapons… it is to become an animal. If we fight with our claws, we become what Czerka believes we are: no longer sentient creatures, but beasts. Do you understand now?/ he asked, and Ashi slowly nodded. /I lost my honor when I attacked my brother like that. Nothing will make up for it, _nothing_./

_Oh. _"Damn. That might complicate things." She paused, and then added, "So they're_ not_ likely to forgive and forget?"

Zaalbar shook his shaggy head, and she shrugged. "Worth a try. But, Zaalbar… we need to get to the Map somehow. If it's in the Shadowlands, the only way we'll get to it is by getting Wookiee permission. We have to see Chuundar." She hesitated. "Can you lead us to him?"

Slowly, Zaalbar nodded. /Yes. I can do that./

* * *

The first they saw of Rwookrrorro was a large gate in the walkway, guarded by an armed Wookiee. He stared skeptically at Ashi, who was in the lead. /You are not one of the Czerka. Why are you here, human? And why have you brought this traitor back?/ he added angrily, as he recognized Zaalbar.

Ashi grimaced. "Uh-oh."

The Wookiee beckoned them forward. /Come on/ he growled. /You had better come and see Chuundar./

Zaalbar moaned. /This is bad. Chuundar won't be happy to see me, Ashi. I'm not supposed to be here. I should never have come!/

Ashi, who couldn't be bothered to be nice, looked over and replied, "Shut up, Zaalbar." He stopped whimpering, although he gave her what looked like a reproachful glance, which she ignored. Turning to the other Wookiee, she straightened in a dignified way, and replied, "Very well. Take us to Chuundar."

The residents of Rwookrrorro stared as they were marched through the village. At first, it was at Ashi and her friends, but slowly their gazes moved to Zaalbar, as one by one they realized who he was. He hung his head, unable to meet their withering glares, but Ashi stared back, trying to look braver than she felt.

Finally, they reached the chieftain's hall. Ashi was immediately surprised by the amount of extravagancies. There were carpets and human-made chairs, as well as men in the green and orange of Czerka in the corners, all carrying blasters. Ashi glared at the one with his gun trained on her, and though he didn't lower it, he winced visibly.

Luckily for him, her attention was diverted when a large black Wookiee rose from a chair at the end of the hall, and made his way towards them. All the Wookiees in the room bowed, and Ashi found herself thrust roughly to her knees by the Wookiee guard behind her. The floor was hard, and a jolt of pain rushed through her kneecaps.

"Fracking _hell_," she hissed, but he growled threateningly, his claws digging into her wrists, and she fell silent.

/What have we here?/ Chuundar wondered aloud, looking at Zaalbar with an expression between amusement and hatred. /You return, brother? Have you lost not only your honor, but also your respect for our laws, madclaw?/

Zaalbar snarled under his breath; it was a deep and fearsome sound, full of fury. Chuundar barked out a mocking laugh, and then turned to look at the two humans and the Mandalorian. /And who are your companions, madclaw?/

Ashi, to her credit, grinned. "Hi," she said brightly. "You must be Chuundar. I've heard a lot about you." She glanced around at the room, still smiling. "I'd wave or something, but I think your guard'll kill me if I move." She paused, and then added, with just a hint of sarcasm, "If your _sniper_ doesn't get me first." With a jerk of her head, she indicated the nervous-looking Czerka man. He flushed, brandishing his blaster in a nonthreatening sort of way.

Chuundar was not amused. /Who are you, human? Why are you travelling with my exiled brother?/

She pursed her lips. "I'm Ashi Lucas. And we're busy trying to save the galaxy right now, and it's a little hard to explain, but I need to go visit the Shadowlands. Can I do that?"

Chuundar seemed pleased at being asked permission; he stroked his chin in mock contemplation. /I don't know. What is there for me, human, in letting you go explore the most sacred lands of our planet?/

Ashi found the use of _sacred_ slight overkill, but the other Wookiees seemed to like Chuundar's show of defending Kashyyyk. There were several barks of approval from the guards lining the walls, and Ashi rolled her eyes.

"Because we're trying to save the galaxy, remember? So in the end, helping us helps you. Unless you plan on not being conquered by Malak and his army of doom—and how're you going to manage that?" she challenged. "Gonna have Czerka over there fight them off?" She gestured again at the man, who was looking very worried at all the attention.

Chuundar looked at her for a long moment, and then walked slowly closer. Ashi had not been allowed to get up; she stared up at him with all the dignity she could muster, but he still towered over her. The effect was, altogether, terrifying.

/You're cocky, human/ he growled softly. /Didn't anyone ever teach you some respect?/

"You can try, but I doubt it'll work," Ashi replied evenly. Her eyes flashed as she spoke. "I'm not good at being told what to do."

Chuundar paused, and then jerked his head upward. Ashi was yanked to her feet from behind by the guard—an experience that left her shoulders screaming in protest—and stumbled as she found her footing. Slowly and deliberately, Chuundar reached up a clawed hand, placing a fingertip under Ashi's chin. She suppressed a shiver as she felt the point dig into the soft skin of her neck.

The Wookiee leaned in closer. /I could kill you in an instant/ he breathed. /One easy motion, and you would be dead, human. Perhaps you would be wise to learn some respect. Perhaps this lesson would stay./

/No!/

Zaalbar was jerked back as he leapt to his feet, but his guard struggled to restrain him. /Don't!/

Chuundar pulled back to look at him and smiled; his teeth were yellowed but very sharp. /And why would you care, madclaw? Why does it matter to you, the fate of one human…?/

Then a spark of realization lit in his eyes, and he barked with sudden laughter. /Oh, Zaalbar! You've sworn a lifedebt! This is _rich_./ He turned back to Ashi. /Do you understand the lifedebt, human?/ he asked, and she nodded defiantly. /Then do you know it is based on honor?/ He broke off to laugh mockingly again. /How much is that worth, then, the lifedebt of one with no honor?/

Zaalbar strained against the guard's iron grip. /He disrespects my lifedebt! My _honor!_/

/What honor?/ scoffed Chuundar.

Ashi, sensing an oncoming, cleared her throat loudly. Both Chuundar and Zaalbar froze, turning to look at her. "I'm, uh, sorry about not respecting you," she said quickly. "So, do you think we can go to the Shadowlands, or…"

Chuundar paused. He seemed rather pleased at having so much power over her with his decision. Stroking his chin with a paw, he replied /Perhaps, if you address me correctly first, human./

"Correctly?"

He smirked. /The _mighty _Chuundar./

Zaalbar grunted incredulously. /Mighty? You were the runt!/ Ashi bit her lip to hide a grin, and Chuundar whirled back to his brother again.

/Silence! That was long ago!/ he snapped, loosing some of his cool as he scrambled for excuses. /Better than a madclaw with no honor, anyway!/

/You lost your honor long before me, you slaver!/

Chuundar froze. All the other Wookiees in the room had gone silent, and a few were glancing back at the Czerka men as they considered Zaalbar's accusation. The chieftain growled.

/Out! All Wookiees, out; I must speak with the madclaw alone./ Uncertainly, his Wookiees left. As soon as they were gone, Chuundar laced his fingers behind his back, and began to pace in front of them.

/Here we are again, brother/ he said wryly. /You, well meaning but stupid. Me, looking to the future. And I assume you remember what happened last time/ he added, glancing meaningfully at Zaalbar's claws. /There is danger in your words, Zaalbar; you endanger the future of Kashyyyk. I have sacrificed some things to give the others what they think is their freedom. And now we are all happy./

Zaalbar roared, baring his teeth. /Except the ones who are enslaved! You are disgracing the name of Kashyyyk!/

Chuundar smiled. /But I am chieftain, brother. There is nothing you can do to stop me. My power is absolute./

His brother paused, but then shook his head suddenly. /No, it's not. There's still someone who can stop you./

"Yeah!" Ashi chimed in, rather unexpectedly. Zaalbar didn't bother to hide his surprise. "How's it feel to know we've got an ace in the hole, Chuundar? You're not so powerful after all."

But Chuundar snorted. /Do not speak of what you do not know, human. He means our father, Freyyr. And he has been banished for many years as well./ He paused, and then sighed.

/It complicates things, brother, your return. You are too much of a threat to this arrangement I've worked out./ Zaalbar looked unconvinced, but Chuundar shook his head. /No, no, no, brother. You see, this agreement with Czerka is precarious. And if you come in, barking about slavers and corruption, it stirs up trouble./

The black Wookiee stopped pacing, and his tone shifted slightly, gaining a razor edge. /You understand, I'm sure, that I don't want trouble. So, what to do with you, to stop you spreading your rumors?/

Ashi frowned. "Look, we need to go to the Shadowlands. And if you let us do that then we'll go, and we won't bother you anymore, okay?" A quick glance from her to Zaalbar reassured him that they weren't going to condone slavery, and he nodded reluctantly. Chuundar contemplated this slowly.

/Very well/ he said finally. /You can go visit the Shadowlands, on one condition./

"I'm listening."

/There is a mad Wookiee in the Shadowlands who has been causing some trouble to the Czerka groups who go down there. You may go down, but I don't want you to come back here without having killed him./ The Wookiee smiled wickedly. /And to ensure you return, I think I'll keep your friends here./ He gestured at Canderous, Bastila, and Zaalbar, all of who objected immediately and loudly.

"Isn't my word good enough?" she protested. "I need them!"

Chuundar growled. /You are human. Your word is never good enough. You may bring… one of them./ He paused, and then added /Not Zaalbar. I won't have him stirring up more of his trouble. But you may choose one of your other—/

"Canderous," Ashi interrupted immediately.

The Mandalorian smiled, and Bastila glared as Ashi beckoned him over. "I'll be back, Z," she added. "Promise."

He nodded, convinced: she wouldn't break her word to him. Ashi gazed up at him apologetically, gave a final brisk nod, and then turned and walked away.

* * *

As soon as they left the village, she began to walk back to the Ebon Hawk. Canderous was disappointed, but she reminded him that once they went down to the Shadowlands, they'd be staying there for a while—they'd want backup.

As soon as they stepped onto the Ebon Hawk, Mission was there, her face slightly puzzled. "Hey… what're you guys doing back so soon?" Then, face creasing in worry at Ashi's awkward expression, and the lack of Wookiee, she asked, "And, um, where's Z and the princess? Why aren't they here? _What happened, Ash_?"

Carth and Juhani entered, just as Ashi began uncertainly, "Um, Mission, did Z ever tell you _why_ he left Kashyyyk?"

Slowly she explained about Chuundar and slavers and _madclaw_, and the current hostage situation. Mission's face grew more distressed as she went. Finally, when Ashi was finished, she burst out, "What's gonna happen to him now? They're not gonna kill him, are they?"

"Doubt it," Ashi replied calmly. "That raises suspicion, and besides, he wants us to do as he says in the Shadowlands. Z alive gives him leverage." She grinned. "I'm considering letting him keep the brat, though."

Mission laughed, partly appeased, but then frowned. "But you're gonna save him soon, right? You can't let them keep him there! What if…" She broke off, swallowing hard. "What if they decide they don't need him alive anymore?"

Ashi grinned wickedly. "Then we kill Chuundar and take the Star Map by force. No one's going to kill Z, Mission, I promise." Mission nodded slowly.

"Okay," she said. "I want to come help you find the Star Map."

Ashi's eyes widened, and she shook her head firmly. "_Oh_, no. Have you ever seen the Shadowlands, kid? Because they're full of things that like to eat people. _Big_ things," she added, stretching out her arms, "with a lot of teeth. There's no way in hell I'm taking you there."

Mission crossed her arms indignantly. "How come? I was good on Taris, right? I can help! And Big Z's my best friend; I'm not just gonna sit here and wait for you to rescue him! You gotta let me come, Ash!"

"No," said Ashi firmly. "I refuse. You can argue, kid, but it makes no difference. You're still not coming."

Mission opened her mouth to object, but then closed it miserably. "So I just, like, stay here and wait? And that's all?"

Ashi felt a rush of sympathy for Mission, but she was adamant. "Z won't thank me if I let you get eaten, kid." Mission glared, and she laughed. "Come on, be good and I'll bring you a tach or something. And anyway," she added suddenly, with a vindictive grin, "you're not the only one. Republic is staying here too."

Carth's mouth dropped open. "What?" he demanded. "No way. I'm not being a babysitter, sister."

"Hey! I ain't no kid, geezer, remember?" Mission snapped. "I don't need a babysitter!"

Ashi smirked. /It's not you; it's him/ she explained quickly in Twi'leki. /Nothing's going to piss him off more than being stuck here while I'm out saving the galaxy./ The girl's wide eyes filled with understanding.

/Gotcha/ she said, smiling widely. /So I can be annoying?/

Ashi nodded enthusiastically. /Definitely. Please./ _Oh, revenge is sweet_. "Juhani, Ordo, let's go," she said, reverting to Basic and beckoning, and the two followed. "Back in few days, probably," she called, stifling a grin, before hurrying off the ship.

She wasn't fast enough, though, because she heard him rushing up behind them. _Go away_, she thought exasperatedly, but he evidently didn't get the message, because he grabbed her arm to stop her. She sighed.

"Go persuade the gate guard to let us back through, Canderous."

"Got it," he said, raising his blaster, and set off. Juhani followed nervously. Ashi turned and scowled.

"What do you want, Republic?"

He stared. "You're making me stay here? While the rest of you go find Star Maps and go on your mission? You're leaving me to be a _babysitter_?"

_Someone's predictable._ "But you're so good with kids," she said, trying to hide a grin and failing miserably.

He was not amused. "How long are you going to make me stay here?"

Ashi tapped her chin in mock consideration. "Oh, I don't know. Until you apologize, or until hell freezes over; I haven't decided which is less likely yet." She tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let her.

"But what did I _do_?"

She stared at him in an incredulous kind of way, as though she couldn't believe he had actually just asked that. "That's rich. Where have you _been_?" she snapped. "All this time I'm busy risking my life for you guys on a daily basis, and you can't even find it in yourself to give me a damn bit of credit! It's a two-way street, Carth: you can't expect anything from me if you're being a jerk in return."

"So what do you want?" he exclaimed, throwing up his hands.

Ashi raised an eyebrow, as if it should have been obvious. "Trust," she said simply. "Think about it."

She pulled away; he didn't try to stop her, and she made her way quickly to the gate. The guard reluctantly let them through—Canderous cocking his blaster less than subtly in the background might have helped—and, at last, they began to head for the Shadowlands.

* * *

**I know, I know: you were hoping for a lot more action (reasonable; it _is_ Kashyyyk). Rest assured that it is coming, along with everyone's favorite senile non-Jedi. And I know perfectly well that was a cheap trick to take Bastila out of the picture, but really, did you want her there to begin with?  
**

**As always, r&r-- reviewers get a quote and some foreshadowing for the next chapter...**


	11. Wilderness

**Finally! Kashyyyk just isn't Kashyyyk without Jolee and things to kill. Thanks as always to everyone who reviewed!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR**

**Wilderness: a wild and uncultivated region, as of forest or desert**

To Canderous's satisfaction, they found an excess of violent wildlife on the path to fight off before they reached the basket to the lower depths of Kashyyyk. A Wookiee who introduced himself gruffly as Gorwooken was waiting, and he silently started their descent as soon as they were on the lift. Utterly unaffected by the miles-high trees, he stood with his hand on the controls, surveying them menacingly.

However, if asked, Canderous and Juhani would have agreed that Ashi didn't seem to even have noticed. She looked like she was on her first flight in a starship. For the entire half hour descent, she stood gazing out in wonder across the wilderness of the forest planet, her face pensive and unreadable. She had never been to Kashyyyk, or any planet remotely like it, with her whole life spent in cities, but while its vaguely sinister beauty mesmerized her, she was also trying to pinpoint a feeling of familiarity. Why did she feel like she had been here before?

She was also beginning, to her annoyance, to feel tired. The couple-hour trek along the Great Walkway, along with the fact that it was already evening, meant that while her mind was wide awake, her body was beginning to tire from the sudden increase in physical intensity. She would have to do something about that.

Finally they touched down in the Shadowlands. Gorwooken barked a quick goodbye and left. Ashi, meanwhile, ignored him. She was captivated by the thick, vivid forest around them, and in an instant found herself understanding why their land was so precious to the Wookiees. The grass by their feet was knee-length and ghostly pale, and massive roots wove through it, forming trees larger around than the Ebon Hawk that practically dripped with animals, foliage, and eerie white fungi. Ashi couldn't imagine how Zaalbar had ever been able to leave. The place was rugged and gorgeously wild around them… but that was what suddenly drew her eyes to the ground directly in front of them. The grass had been cut, forming a path to some unknown destination. Ashi's eyes narrowed.

"Figures," she muttered, as she began to follow it.

They had hardly been walking for a minute, however, when Canderous stopped. "Do you hear…" he began, and Ashi nodded.

"…That? Yeah," she finished. "You think…" But her thought was cut off as they turned a corner into a wide-open area of path—it might have been an abandoned campground—and saw a diminutive man in distinctive blue armor and a hat similar to one of the white fungi. Ashi's mouth dropped open in blatant shock, and he smirked. "I have to give you credit; you've led me on quite a chase. But no one gets away from Calo Nord in the end!"

But Ashi had recovered from her initial surprise. Utterly straight-faced, she turned to Canderous and stage-whispered, loud enough for Calo to catch every word, "_Canderous! One of the mushrooms is talking to me!_" She was grinning widely at the words, eyes glittering with delight at the man's expense, and, despite being Mandalorian and known for his utter lack of humor, Canderous snorted with amusement.

Calo Nord flushed angrily. "You're going to pay for that!" he yelled across the clearing, but the edge of intimidation he'd had had effectively been destroyed. Meanwhile, Ashi suddenly frowned.

"Hey, wait, wait. How are you _here_? Didn't you die last time we saw you?"

Calo Nord brushed her off. "You got lucky on Taris. But—"

She interrupted, to his visibly mounting anger. "Uh, no. The ceiling _definitely_ fell on you. I don't know how to tell you this, but you're supposed to be dead."

The bounty hunter, so known for the terror he inspired, seemed furious at Ashi's apparent indifference. "But I'm not, am I?" he cackled madly. "And you will be, soon! The Sith attack saved you from a painful death last time," he added chillingly, now at ease back in his element, "but I promise they won't be interrupting this…"

"All right," Ashi conceded with a sigh. "You've made your point, and we're all very impressed you survived. But didn't we beat you before, anyway?"

"Luck!" Calo shrieked, his cool and apathetic front completely gone. Flecks of spit flew from his mouth. "You were lucky, that's all! No one escapes Calo Nord!"

Enough of a death wish for Ashi. She reached for her lightsaber, raising an eyebrow fractionally. "You think I got lucky? All right, Nord, let's do it again!"

Calo smiled wickedly, finally in his comfort zone. "Let's go, boys," he said, motioning to a group of alien lackeys. "It's show time."

She nodded appreciatively. "Good line," she called back, before reaching quickly for her pocket. The tiredness she'd felt on the lift was strengthening, and she didn't want to run into a fight that way. Her fingers, rummaging hurriedly through her few supplies, clasped quickly around what she was looking for. The Jedi hadn't exactly appreciated them, and on Taris, supplies had been harder to come by than she would. This was a direct throwback to smuggling—there'd been the members of the crew who preferred to sample the spice they were carrying, but she'd always preferred things that gave her more of an edge.

There was a sting as the needle pierced her skin, and then all her muscles tensed suddenly, the delicious feeling of the stim beginning its work. She felt her vision sharpen; even in the darkness, she could see Calo Nord, blaster out and a mad, eerie grin painted like a banner across his face. Ashi ached to fight, to wipe that damn smile off his face…

"Let's go!" she called, and Canderous grinned. He'd seen the adrenaline stim—hell, she'd probably gotten it from him to begin with.

"Excellent," he replied, and a moment later they met the oncoming crowd with a spectacular clash of energy and light. Two lackeys fell dead from his blaster and Juhani's lethal lightsaber, while Ashi headed straight for the bounty hunter. He fired off a couple mad shots before drawing a vibroblade and meeting her furious attack head-on.

Ashi would give him credit for surprising strength, and pulled back, summoning the Force to give her a boost—even though the stim was helping massively. Shoving a hand forward, palm out, she Calo flying back. He hit a tree with an ugly crack, but sprang back up again, ignoring a trail of blood running from his scalp.

In the midst of the chaos, his eyes found hers. Calo Nord stared at her with a burning hatred in his face, and Ashi knew immediately that she looked the same. Her body burned with a desire to move, to _fight_. Canderous and Juhani were taking care of the lackeys. This was her battle, and she wouldn't have had it any other way.

As it was, though, he was a bounty hunter, and when it came down to it, they tended to eliminate people with methods other than hand-to-hand combat. Even if he was an expert with a sniper gun or grenades, and even though fury made him strong, Calo Nord was no duelist, and he was realizing it quickly. Ashi, on the other hand, had the Force on her side. She was lightning fast, and it was obviously wearing Calo down.

All it took was one slip. His vibroblade glanced off her shoulder, but in the rush she hardly felt it. She caught his blade in hers and twisted; he was suddenly weaponless.

"No!" he gasped, but she plunged the blade into his neck, jerking it down sharply. He collapsed to the ground with a thud, followed by silence.

"And stay dead," said Ashi vindictively, glaring at the body.

Canderous approached from behind, nodding slowly. "Nice."

"I know," Ashi replied, and with her back to him, he didn't see her smile at the hard-won compliment. She bent down to relieve the corpse of any useful possessions, making a mental note not to aim for necks next time—it might be quick, but it was messy too. Finally, having gotten what she wanted—the energy shield and the hat—she motioned them further along, jamming the large white cap onto her head. Canderous snorted dryly, but made no comment.

However, morale began to die fairly quickly when they couldn't find anything remotely like a Star Map. The only vaguely interesting things they found were katarn that tried more often than not to eat them, and fighting group after group of those was wearing Juhani and Canderous down. Conversely, Ashi was wide-awake from the stim, and that was beginning to annoy the other two more than the katarn.

But then, just as she skirted a tree, Ashi froze. She could hear something that sounded oddly like a clash and hum of static. She turned to her friends, but before she could say anything, Canderous nodded. "Yeah, I hear it."

Juhani frowned lightly. "It is most peculiar… it almost sounds like a lightsaber."

"Yeah, you're right," Ashi murmured; reluctantly, she pulled off the hat, as the moment called for seriousness. "But what the hell's a lightsaber doing here?"

"More Sith?" offered Canderous hopefully, and she grinned.

"Aren't you subtle. I'll go check it out. If I yell, come." They nodded, and she ducked quietly under the foliage that hid their view.

There was a definite buzz and crackle of energy, and a strange green light. She followed it curiously, and finally, peering around a tree, discovered the source. A man, dark-skinned and, frankly, rather old, was fighting off a herd of katarn single-handedly. He didn't look like a Jedi, but he was whirling and slashing with a bright green lightsaber. Ashi was reassured—that was the color of a Consular. If he was a Sith, he'd be more than happy to flaunt a red blade, wouldn't he?

Although, if he was a Consular, she remembered he wasn't supposed to be a fighter, and he was doing a hell of a job with the katarn. As she watched, two fell from a fantastic spin and cleaving swing of his blade. "Damn," she said, without thinking.

Maybe she'd said it louder than she thought, or maybe those things had good ears. Either way, one of the katarn suddenly noticed her. Deciding she seemed like an easier target than the old man, the scaly reptilian creature turned and began to rush her. She drew her lightsaber and dodged its charge, but just as she was about to counterattack, the whole thing went wrong.

Unexpectedly, the stim wore off. Some things, like natural energy, faded slowly, but stims worked off your own adrenaline, siphoning double the normal amount to keep you wide awake. They stopped working _very_ suddenly. And, having used double the normal adrenaline, the immediate crash often left one helpless.

Without warning, Ashi felt her legs stop working. She staggered, falling hard to the ground; her lightsaber dropped from her limp hand. The katarn snorted in surprise at her abrupt helplessness, but then prepared to attack. "_Damn_," she swore again, this time worried. Then, the next moment, its jaws clamped around her.

Ashi tried to scream, and it wound up trapped behind her frozen lips. She could feel the katarn's huge teeth digging into her shoulder, ripping through muscle and skin alike, and it was agony. If she had been thinking clearly, she would have tried to reach the Force, but thinking straight wasn't easy when something was half-eating you. The creature shook her a couple times before releasing her, and she was thrown several feet, landing hard on the leafy ground like a rag doll. Blood trickled down her shoulder, soaking her arm and back, as the katarn began to charge again.

What happened next, through her blurry, dizzy vision, was confusing, but she heard a rush of static and a keening cry, before a large thud. The next moment, a figure, hazy but bathed in green light, was approaching her. Thoughts flew through her mind. The first, _I'm dead_, she dismissed right away as untrue. The second was overpowering curiosity at the figure before her. He ought to be coming into better focus, as she blinked several times, but her vision was getting hazier instead.

"I could use some help," she mumbled, although since her lips weren't cooperating, she wasn't sure how much he understood.

Enough, apparently. He knelt down beside her and muttered something she couldn't make out, but the next second a rush of blue light wavered around her. She felt the strange tingling sensation of wounds healing over, and then both the pain and the paralyzing exhaustion were gone.

"Thanks," she said sincerely, sitting up. "Good trick."

"Bah," he muttered. "Only if you're stupid enough to go getting yourself half gnawed to death by a katarn."

Ashi blinked, vaguely surprised at the insult, but found herself liking the old man more for it. "Who're you, then, some kind of hermit? I only ask because you don't meet too many hermits with lightsabers." She paused, a grin pulling at her lips. "Please tell me you're not a Jedi. I know enough of those already."

He raised his eyebrows. "You aren't one? You've got a lightsaber too, and you're about incapable enough in battle to be one."

"I crashed off a stim," she protested. "I'm not usually that bad."

The old man snorted. "Not hard to be better than that, lass."

But then, quite suddenly, he paused and stared at her. His gaze was piercing, and Ashi felt uncomfortably transparent as he stared at her, but then he gave a brisk nod, breaking the stillness. It seemed, to her confusion, as if she had passed some kind of unknown test, before he said, "I'm Jolee, Jolee Bindo. Hermit of the Shadowlands, etcetera, etcetera. Come with me to my camp, and we'll talk a bit."

Ashi looked back at him, trying to mirror the unreadable gaze, but couldn't quite. She found herself wondering exactly what he been looking for, and what he thought he'd seen.

"Ashi Lucas," she replied slowly, unable to keep some of the uncertainty from seeping into her voice. "Sure; let me get my friends." Quickly, she got to her feet and started back through the underbrush. Jolee stared after her, long after the foliage had settled back into its place, a thoughtful frown creasing his face.

It was the same person, no doubt; she had the same stride, the same look about her, and, of course, her aura was unmistakable. But there was a difference: the last time he had seen her, she had been doubtless dark, her essence tinged blood red with anger and hatred. This time there was the same sense of righteousness, and some anger, certainly, but it was leaning much more towards a grayish-blue, eons lighter than before.

And the most noticeable thing, by far—which was saying something—was the destiny he could feel in her. Sure as hell, there was a strong fate for this girl, and it interested Jolee. So when she returned with her friends a few minutes later, he was waiting, and he led the small group calmly through the Shadowlands to his small camp.

Ashi looked around curiously as they entered his small house. "Yes," Jolee said, however, before she could make a comment, "I live like a burrowing rodent, under a tree. Honestly," he muttered, scowling at the walls, "I fought the Sith, and now look at me."

But as he said it, he realized that, in fact, they _were_. Her companions were both too easy to read; Jolee could tell they were both wondering exactly where she had found this strange old man, and why she was making them follow him. He rolled his eyes, not missing how rigidly both of them stood, obviously ill at ease in a new environment. "Go on," he said gruffly. "Pull up a stump; make yourselves at home."

Following his own advice, he sat down. Ashi did, too, and after a moment, the Mandalorian and the Cathar followed suit. He gave them all a once-over, and then, eyes settling on Ashi, he said, "Well. You wanted to talk to me?"

She smiled. It was obviously an expression common to her face, but it caught him off guard, for she never had the last time he'd seen her. "Strange old hermit hiding out in the forest, happens to fight with a lightsaber? Hell, yeah, I'm curious."

"Very well, lass," he said, infusing resignation into his tone. "Go on; time's a'wasting. What is it you'd like to know?"

It was never a good idea to give Ashi an open invitation for questions. "You said you fought the Sith," she pointed out, settling back into the chair. "So are you a Jedi? Or were you one, anyway?"

Jolee sighed, rubbing his neck. "Damnable ears of the young. You hear more than you should." But then he shrugged, shifting his gaze to the low-curving ceiling. "I was, I suppose. But not anymore. I'm no Jedi now, just an old man who's been lost in the woods for far too long. My days of glory are behind me," he added wryly. "But still." He was curious as to why she would be back now, different but so similar. Was she seeking the same thing again?

"Perhaps there is something I can do for you," he said carefully. "You must have questions."

"Yeah," Ashi nodded, sitting up straight. "Have you seen a crazed Wookiee anywhere?" She was reluctant to mention the Star Map, unsure he would know what she meant.

"Ah." Jolee leant back slightly, his eyes frosting over. When he spoke, there was an edge to his voice. "Are you working on Chuundar's command, then?" _Have you really changed at all_, he wondered, _or have you just found an even better disguise than the one you're famous for?_

Ashi heard the sudden sharpness, and shook her head firmly. "No way in hell," she replied, and he found it difficult to doubt her sincerity. "He's a slaver with fur. I'm doing something for him because he's got some of my crewmates held hostage. And I'm not fine with the whole Czerka slavery deal, either, for the record." She frowned, checking her point was made, and then continued, "What do you know about Chuundar, anyway?"

Jolee made a vague sort of noise in the back of his throat, keeping his face blank. He wouldn't get her real opinion if he voiced his own. "Czerka Corporation was smart to put him in charge. He's about as good at destroying Wookiee culture as dropping corpses full of Hydroxian flu." He stopped himself, realizing how angry he sounded, before musing, "Will you work for him, or against him, I wonder? I'll be interested to see."

"You don't have a recommendation?"

He snorted. "How's this: think for yourself. I'm not one for telling you what to do, and I'm big on letting people figure things out for themselves."

To his surprise, however, Ashi grinned. "Space, it's good to hear that," she said brightly. "Between the Jedi and Republic advocates I've got traveling with me, I never get told to decide for myself."

"Jedi _and_ Republic? You've got taste in companions."

Instantly her eyes narrowed, and she exhaled sharply. "Yeah, well. Neither of them's there because I like them very much." Canderous snorted dryly at that, inciting a grin from Ashi before she continued, "So, what about the Wookiee? Is he a madclaw?"

The word caught Jolee off guard, and he stiffened visibly. "Now how do you know a word like that?"

She waved it off. "Long story. I know one, but he doesn't deserve it—he's far more honorable than Chuundar. Is this Wookiee like that, or what?"

"I would say… yes," he replied slowly. "He's not crazy, per say—more mad with grief. I helped him pass to the lower forest, where only a Wookiee could go. Other matters will determine if you can follow."

"Yeah? Like what?"

"There is a barrier," he replied elusively. "But we can talk about that more in a moment." He paused, fixing her with a thoughtful stare. She met his gaze, lifting an eyebrow in an echo of a challenge, and he found himself smiling back. "Now, why are you really in the Shadowlands?" he asked calmly. "I don't doubt your story about your crewmates, but that can't be the only reason."

She hesitated, and then nodded. "You're right. It's not. I'm looking for a Star Map."

He hid the surprise and interest that rushed through him—so she was back, with the same purpose in mind—and scowled, harrumphing. "Ah, of course. The Star Map: that must be it. There's nothing else here. I mean," he added sarcastically, "it's not like the problems of a few Wookiees can compare at all with the all-important mission of the Jedi. No, _you're_ here for the Map."

Quite suddenly, Ashi stood up, glaring at him. "Look, if you have an opinion on my mission," she snapped, "you can stuff it. This isn't something I'm doing for love of the Jedi. I didn't know it either, but it turns out they're capable of blackmail, and now I'm stuck doing this to get my life back. So if you have anything helpful, you could say it now, before I _leave_."

She finished the speech by crossing her arms, shooting a caustic glare that could have burned holes in steel. Jolee met her scowl with an enigmatic smile: interested by her response, but also pleased to have the opportunity to be annoying. "You know, Kashyyyk is an interesting place," he said conversationally.

Ashi looked skeptical. He could tell that it was another expression she used often.

"No, really. More so than anyone suspects. If Czerka Corporation knew," he added wryly, "the whole place would be a strip mine. The Wookiees have their legends that they were not always here, but it is more than that. The trees themselves are strangers!" he said, hiding a grin at the line. With every word, he realized more and more how much he'd missed having someone to be difficult to.

"You are rambling, old man," she said matter-of-factly. "Can you get to the point? I mean, if you have one."

He had been planning on muffling a smirk and making an equally snarky reply, when inspiration. "What I'm saying," he replied, "is that there are literally walls in your way, and you won't find what you need without my help. But my help has a price. You must do a task for me, and then let me come with you, and in return, I'll remove certain barriers in your path." He already knew she could lie with the ease that most people breathed, and propaganda was her second language. How she acted, given a task, would tell him more than talking to her ever could.

"Oh, good," she replied brightly, pressing her hands to her cheeks. "Because I love jumping through hoops for senile old men, and it's not like I have anything important to do."

He ignored her. "Oh, save it. I know this sounds absurd, but I'm old and entitled to work you around a little bit. Besides, the test is simple." This, at least, was the truth. "Since they began expanding in the Shadowlands, the Czerka have left me alone, for the most part…"

"Can't blame them," Ashi interjected shamelessly.

"…_Until recently_, anyway. A group of them set up camp not far from here. Damn poachers, is all they are," he added resentfully. Thanks to years of experience, he could grumble until hell froze over, but while there were only a few things he really disliked, Czerka and their poachers were one of them. "I'd like them removed from this place. But not killed," he added deliberately, more for the sake of his experiment than that of the poachers.

"Oh, great. The old man wants me to go get some kids off his lawn."

"Yes, yes, I'm old and stubborn," he snapped. "But those men are destroying the natural life and ecosystem here. Look at the forest." He gestured out one of the small windows, through which a fragment of the Shadowlands could be seen. "They're killing that. And I don't like it."

Ashi looked at him for a long moment. It wasn't hard to see the inner debate, but she finally shrugged. "Fair enough. But why would you want to come with me?"

_Curiosity,_ he thought, but he wasn't going to tell her that. "You presumably have a ship," he muttered gruffly, "and I've seen all I want to here. Isn't that enough? I mean, I'm really sick of the trees."

"Of course. The stranger trees."

He half-grinned for a moment, before adding, "And your destiny might show me something new. You never know."

She paused, considering, and then smiled unexpectedly. _It improves her features so much_, he thought dryly, _not to have a mask_. "Cool. Another misfit. Okay, I'll look into it for you."

The old man nodded approvingly. "Good. Return to me here when you're finished and we'll see how you have done."

Ashi paused. She and her friends all looked at the door, and then exchanged glances, coming to a mutual agreement. "Um… actually," she said, with a sheepish grin, "it's pretty late, and we're all tired. You think we could crash here?"

He didn't mind, really, but he sighed nonetheless. "Oh, very well. I don't have beds for you, so you best not mind sleeping on the floor," he added, and Ashi managed a grateful nod.

"Thanks, old man," she replied—so naturally that he found himself unable to muster offense—before switching to a chair in the corner. Immediately, she curled onto her side, closing her eyes. The Cathar followed suit, and the Mandalorian, although neither looked half so at ease. Mistrust was far more obvious on their faces. He didn't think for a second that she trusted him either, but she hid it well, apathy obviously a weapon she wielded comfortably.

He headed into the other room, slightly smaller, and got into his bed, half-grinning when he heard Ashi mutter, "Oh, relax. He's not going to kill you in your sleep, Canderous. You're as bad as Carth." A thoughtless little smile appeared on his face as he rolled over, mulling over the conversation they'd just had with some satisfaction.

He was leaving Kashyyyk behind for good, and that was a little sad—he'd grown fond of the planet—but how much better could it get, than to stumble upon the biggest unfolding destiny since Andor Vex? Not only that, but someone who'd already _had_ a huge destiny, even if she appeared not to know it.

Ah, yes. Her apparent naivety was curious too. _In fact_, he thought with a slight frown, _that may be the most puzzling thing of all_. He would have to find out about that… although, maybe in the morning…

Ashi sauntered through the woods, in the slightly less shady lighting that marked noon in the Shadowlands. Outwardly, she gave every sign of alertness, but her thoughts were distracted. She'd gotten rid of the poachers like Jolee had wanted, and that meant he was officially part of their crew. Thinking about her newest addition, however, made her wonder again about his reasons why. Contrary to what he'd said, people didn't just get up and go after years of being a hermit because they were tired of trees.

But what else had he said? Something about her destiny, and how interesting it was. Did she have a destiny? A mission, maybe, but even if it was a mission to save the galaxy, she didn't consider that a fate worth abandoning his life for. For an old man who wasn't a Jedi, that entire comment sounded awfully Jedi-like…

She was shaken from her thoughts when she suddenly caught sight of Jolee's house again. "Welcome back," he said, as Ashi entered the cabin, looking pleased with herself. "Have you done as I asked yet?"

"Yep," she replied, sitting down on a stump and crossing her legs. "I don't think you'll be seeing any of those poachers again soon."

But Jolee had already been able to tell that, had known from the moment she approached his hut again. It was certainly curious for her to have spared them; she certainly wouldn't have done that before. "Yes, I could feel it as you approached," he nodded. "But there is no smell of death on you—you spared them. Interesting."

At that, she glanced at Canderous. "No thanks to _someone_," she muttered, grinning. "But yeah, I think they're alive."

"You think?"

"It depends on how fast they can run."

He stared at her, obviously debating whether it was even worth asking, and she quickly corrected herself. "I didn't kill them. You said not to."

"But I wasn't sure if you'd be able to follow through with that," he replied. "And I was interested to see how it would turn out."

Ashi looked somewhat exasperated. "Great; I've passed your little test. Didn't you mention eliminating barriers? Could we get around to that anytime soon?"

He nodded. "Yes, of course. Let's get moving." He led them out the door, adding, "I noticed the old path some time ago. You probably wouldn't have found it on your own." He ignored her indignant frown at this, and continued, "There's also a Czerka force field up to the northwest, past the poacher camp. I saw it when it was installed, so I know how to pass it. And, on the other side… ancient answers. And perhaps the Wookiee you were seeking. I only hope he's in the mood for visitors," he added ominously, leading them out the door.

If he was hoping to frighten her, it was to no avail. Ashi only smiled all the wider. _Now_, she thought,_ things were getting interesting_.

By the time they managed to locate and deactivate the force field, Ashi would have guessed it was afternoon. Slowly, the group made their way down into the deeper forest, all on edge as the light all but faded, and a thick mist began to obscure vision beyond a few yards. However, the first thing Ashi noticed as they trekked through the forest, now without a path, was sudden roars and cries in the distance. They were far from animal, but wracked with fear.

Instinct kicked in, and she took off toward the noises, before skidding to a sharp stop. In a clearing, a group of Mandalorian warriors were surrounded by Wookiee corpses. A lone Wookiee was left alive, and was desperately fighting one-on-one with a Mandalorian. As she watched, he knocked away the warrior's blade and, with a cleaving stroke, cut off his head.

The other two Mandalorians cried out in anger, voices exploding through the forest, and rushed to attack the Wookiee, who evidently wasn't supposed to have won. Ashi, hand flying to her lightsaber, processed the situation immediately. If the warriors had had honor, they wouldn't be fighting him when he was weakened and outnumbered; but even that aside, it was simply an unfair battle. Hoping that Canderous wouldn't hold it against her, she rushed towards the fight. Focused on the Wookiee, neither saw her coming until it was too late, and she had her blade through the first warrior's back. As his companion turned, a massive bolt of energy struck him down, sending him skidding across the forest floor, and Ashi grinned. Apparently Canderous supported her choice of side.

As soon as the Mandalorian fell, the Wookiee dropped to his knees. For a moment, Ashi wondered what he was doing, and then realized with shock he simply could not stand. He was obviously badly hurt, far more so that she had thought. /Great Bacca/ he bleated /let this outsider be different from the slavers. I beg you… can you help my wounds?/

Ashi shook her head slowly, not a refusal but simply in shock. She hardly registered the plea; her eyes were drifting, horrified, from one Wookiee corpse to another. "What happened here?" she murmured numbly.

The Wookiee cried out again, more desperately. /Please, human… I need to be healed… I am dying/ he managed, his voice growing weaker by the moment.

"Ashi!" said Jolee sharply—the word tasted foreign on his tongue—and she snapped to. Nodding readily, she knelt down besides the Wookiee, holding out a hand over the wound. In a spark of blue that, vivid in the half-light, burned all their eyes, it healed over. The Wookiee sighed in relief.

/I… I thank you/ he breathed. /I had not expected you to help me./ He stopped, and then added hopefully /Perhaps… you will help me again?/

Ashi sat back slightly, tilting her head to the side. "Like how?"

The Wookiee's eyes narrowed, hardening over. /Those men—they killed my hunting party/ he growled. /All of them were slaughtered without honor. I barely survived. I want those murderers to suffer the same./

Slowly, she nodded, doing her best to avert her eyes from the corpses that littered the ground. "Do you know anything about the men that attacked you?" she asked, more to distract herself than anything else.

He shook his shaggy head. /I have not seen their kind before, not even among the Czerka. You saw them: armored head to toe, and yet blending in with the forest. They followed us a long while from the south; their speed was amazing. And…/ He stopped, his voice trembling with anger. /They fought like the outsiders, waiting until we were unarmed. They would not attack us unless our weapons were away! They strike like cowards!/

Canderous nodded tersely. "They're probably a deserter clan who came here for some sport. Bastards," he added, spitting the words in disgust. Ashi glanced over at him, and realized with a jolt that his face was dark with rage. His eyes glinted as they passed over the bodies, empty and pitiless. "They disgrace the name of Mandalore."

Ashi turned to the Wookiee and cocked her head to the side. "Wait—let me get this straight. You want me to walk into a Mandalorian ambush, completely unarmed, to get you some vengeance for your companions?"

/I would fight, but I am weak/ he protested fiercely. /But for the honor of my friends, I cannot leave the Shadowlands until they are avenged./

"Oh, okay. Well, as long as we're clear." She switched abruptly to Shyriiwook, surprising the Wookiee and catching Jolee half off guard as well. /I'll avenge your comrades for you. On my honor, I swear to do this or die in the attempt./

He smiled weakly. /I thank you, human. You… you have honor. This is rare among your species, but I would that there were more of you like that. Look for my fallen comrades' bodies/ he offered, as she got to her feet. /This will be a clue as to where the men are hiding. Thank you/ he repeated, bowing his head, as Ashi nodded and turned away.

"What did you say to him?" Juhani asked.

"Told him I'd get rid of the men who killed his friends," Ashi explained.

"Good," said Canderous and Jolee simultaneously, and Ashi laughed as she headed off down the path. They had hardly been walking for ten minutes, however, when a clearing appeared in front of them, littered with large hairy bodies. They paused several yards from it.

"They're here," Ashi said quietly. "Cover my back, yeah?"

Canderous nodded fiercely—obviously, he was finding the Mandalorian cowards a personal insult. Ashi grinned, and then tossed Juhani her lightsaber.

"Take care of that," she instructed seriously, "and surround the clearing. Come when you hear people attacking me." As soon as she finished speaking, and got nods of understanding from all of them, she ducked into the clearing.

Looking around innocently, she walked into the middle of the space, holding back an instinctive flood of rage at the corpses that littered the ground. Killed without honor—there wasn't really anything worse for a Wookiee, was there? Or a Mandalorian. Out of all the races, they should understand that. So she would have to make them pay for this.

Just as she thought that, she heard the telltale crackle of stealth fields deactivating, and out of her peripheral vision, she could see two figures in dark glinting armor. But… there were only two. Then the third one must be…

Right behind her, she realized, as she heard a cold, harsh laugh, muffled by the helm that covered her attacker's face. "Looks like we've caught another one," he said, and she could hear the smirk in his voice.

He was probably expecting her to cower, or to try to run, seemingly helpless as she was. So what he definitely wasn't expecting was for Ashi to whirl suddenly, and send him flying through the air and into a rock buried among the tree roots. He slumped to the ground, either dead or unconscious, and the next moment three other figures burst through the undergrowth. The one behind him was distinctly feline, and she ran him through with her lightsaber, just to be sure, before tossing Ashi her own weapon.

Lighting it, she rushed to attack the other two, who were sizing up the new battle—four on two—with less enthusiasm. It was a short, quick fight, but as Ashi checked the corpses over, she discovered a datapad on one. She skimmed it, finding her Mandalorian better than she expected, and nodded at the end.

"Yeah, they're deserter raiders," she affirmed. "Killing easy prey off for money. And there's more stuff on here, but I can't get it; it's locked." She raised her head to look at Canderous. "Hey, Dukaar clan sound familiar?"

Disgust flitted across his face. "Dukaar? They abandoned us in the great war, long before the Sith. The cowards fled when Revan came to the battle, and your Republic began to win."

Her eyebrows drew together, a caution in her eyes. "Watch your phrasing, Ordo," she warned. "Not my Republic."

"The Republic, then," he agreed. "Certainly not yours."

The other group of raiders was similarly easy to defeat, but carried something that was much more interesting. These ones carried a signal device to a swoop bike. The bikes were easy to locate. Three were there: all warm to the touch, but only one was missing its signal device. Ashi pulled the device she had found out of her bag and fitted it into the slot. It clicked into place, and she pressed the button to turn it on. A second later she heard a crackle of energy behind her and spun around. A Mandalorian in red armor towered over her, faceless and gigantic.

"You have interrupted our hunt, interloper." From his tone, she could tell he was mildly annoyed, and mostly curious as to how she had done it. "The inhabitants of this world could do little against us, but you appear to be a threat."

Ashi grinned flippantly, staring at where she expected his eyes to be. "Well, that's what I'm here for."

He clenched his fists angrily, the only expression she could make out thanks to his body armor. "Our training here will continue—_without_ your interference!" he snarled, reaching for a sword across his back.

Two Mandalorians materialized by his side, drawing their own weapons. Ashi rolled her eyes. "It is training," she snapped, lighting her blade, "when I can fight back." It was the spark on dynamite, and he charged for her with a snarl of anger, igniting the fight in an instant. Juhani and Canderous took on the other two, respectively, while Jolee hung back, helping where he could with the Force. The lightsabers added an extra level of intensity to the battle, in the darkness of the Shadowlands, and every clash of blades lit the clearing in blue or violet. Finally, Canderous and Juhani both managed to kill their opponents, and Canderous leapt into battle with the leader. Ashi, sensing this was deeper than her simple dislike of their slaughter, hung back to let them fight it out.

It was a short fight, anger making Canderous strong. Finally, with a powerful slash from his vibroblade, the leader's head separated from his shoulders, and his body collapsed to the ground.

Ashi lifted the head and tossed it to Canderous unceremoniously. "Nice. You get to carry the proof," she announced cheerfully, but he just shrugged, wiping his blade before sheathing it. Ashi shook her head inwardly—_was there nothing that fazed him?_—but set aside her distaste. After all, this was one of the things that made him so good to have around.

It was evening by the time they found the Wookiee again, and he leapt to his feet as they approached. /You return! Have you found them? Did you kill them? They were animals in armor/ he added angrily, the words tripping over each other in his hurry, /not a drop of honor among them./

Ashi didn't bother to reply, simply tossed him the head, still helmed. He examined it for a moment before nodding. /Yes… this is the trophy helmet of the one who gave the orders. Their bodies will not last long in the Shadowlands. I am glad. Their taint of cowardice… the forest will consume it all. I hope this brings my comrades peace./

He had stopped speaking directly to them for a moment, eyes drifting to the trees around them, but quickly focused on Ashi again when he finished. /I thank you, human. This is a kind thing you have done./

She shrugged easily. /No problem./

Still, he shook his head. /No, human, you do not understand. You have brought honor to my fallen companions; you acted as a fellow Wookiee would have. You must have this./

He reached down to the ground, and lifted a sword, dark metal that gleamed, razor-sharp, even from her distance. /It is the symbol of my hunting clan. You avenged them, human; you should have it./

She reached out and took the blade in her free hand, testing its weight. Almost immediately, her eyes widened in admiration. "This is… a _really_ nice sword," she observed slowly, tilting it to the side as she examined it. "Are you sure?"

He nodded. /You deserve it. Thank you, human/ he murmured again, before he turned and headed towards the lift. At least, that was, Ashi assumed it was the lift—she had lost all sense of direction. Hopefully at least Jolee knew his way around.

"Great. Good deed of the day, accomplished." She turned back to her friends, and grinned. "Is anyone else tired?"

They ate quickly and handed out sleeping mats, the imposing darkness of the Shadowlands and increasing noise of the forests dwarfing any conversation. Ashi laid hers next to Canderous's, pulling a blanket over her shoulders as she slowly relaxed into it. It was strange, looking up through the forest canopy. The branches, she could see, eventually widened into leafy boughs, but she could only make out the very dim outlines of those, kilometers above her head, and no light wove its way between them. It was a starless night.

Canderous, on the other hand, was sparing no time on thoughts of the forest. He had rolled so his back was to Ashi, but she noticed that his shoulders were hunched in silence, and he seemed even more stolid than usual. "What's wrong, Ordo?" she asked softly, tapping his shoulder.

He ignored her, and she rolled her eyes. "Come on, what is it? I mean, you look pissed."

Still he would not look at her, but she could picture his frown as he spoke. "Maybe you shouldn't talk to me, then."

Ashi paused, just long enough for him to relax, and then pressed, "Is it about those other Mandalorians? The Dukaar clan?"

He stiffened, and then glanced over his shoulder at her. "You really don't shut up, do you?"

She smiled back evenly. "So I'm told."

He shook his head slowly, but this time his expression wasn't as angry. It was sort of pained, Ashi thought, and maybe even a little longing. She hadn't actually thought that Mandalorians were deep enough for nostalgia, but this might be the closest she had ever seen.

"Those bastards," he started, and then stopped. "They were weak, a disgrace to the name of Mandalore. But they are the reason most people think we fight."

Ashi tilted her head to the side, frowning. "Idiocy?'

He glared at her. "No. Bloodthirstiness. Love of slaughter. There is no honor is wiping people out like rats." He stopped, hesitating, before continuing, "We fight not for love of slaughter, but for the honor and glory of battle. It is through combat that we prove our worth, gain renown, and make our fortunes. Win or lose, as long as the fight is worthy, honor is gained. Glory of triumph over impossible odds is what drives us. If there is nothing at stake—your possessions, your life, your world—then the battle is worthless."

His words rang out in the empty air. Ashi could hear the emotion behind them—pride, and dignity, and a little bit of longing. She wanted to say something, but couldn't think what, and slowly they faded into silence. Canderous broke it with a deep sigh.

"Times have changed now. The clans are scattered and broken; there is no one to unite them once more."

Ashi hesitated, genuinely puzzled. "Why not?" she asked doubtfully. "What about Mandalore?"

Canderous shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. "You know, don't you, who the last true Mandalore was? Revan," he answered, when she shook her head, and her eyes widened. "The Jedi Revan defeated our Mandalore in the final battle, and won the war for her side—the Republic and the Jedi. And then she died in dishonor, in an ambush. Even Sith have a code of honor," he added.

"You mean, the one that says that the apprentice has to kill the master in one-on-one combat?"

He stared at her. "How do you know that?"

Ashi paused. "I… don't know," she murmured, almost to herself.

But Canderous—thank space, Ashi thought gratefully—brushed it off. "Never mind. But that code—Malak broke it when he fired on Revan. She died without honor, and so we will not follow him. He is no Mandalore." His voice was harsh with anger, but Ashi just nodded distractedly.

"But can't Mandalore pass on the title?"

He shrugged. "They can. Revan never did. I would assume she did not foresee her death in such a way," he offered, and Ashi nodded.

"Right." There was a pause, the chatter of wildlife pressing down on them, and then she added, "Night, Canderous," and, after a pause, "Thanks."

He didn't reply, but he didn't really need to. They lay in silence, and a minute or two later, Ashi heard him let out to snore. She could hear Jolee snoring too, albeit more quietly, and Juhani's deep but delicate breaths. Smiling unconsciously, she closed her eyes.

Sleep came easily. But so did her dreams.

_She could feel it._

_She stepped forward slowly, brushing aside foliage with an uncaring hand, gloved in black. Her robes swished behind her. The hood was up, the cold metal mask rendering her faceless. She was virtually invisible: another shadow in the Shadowlands._

"_We're close," she said, and her voice lost its humanness with the metallic tint of the mask._

_He nodded. "I know. It should be…"_

_But he stopped, as they stepped into a clearing, her footsteps soft as a cat in comparison to him. In front of her was a figure, blue and shimmering like a typical holo. She approached it, and it swung to face her. Almost sentient, then. Interesting._

"_Who are you?" it asked._

"_Revan," she replied, her voice sure. Simply Revan, no longer weighed down by an official title of the Republic, or 'Jedi'. She had no desire to be either anymore. Malak hung back as she spoke. There was no question in who was the one to answer. Of course it was her. "Who are you?" she asked in return._

"_A computer, programmed to guard an object of the Builders," it said, and at that, he seemed unable to swallow the question that sprung to the tip of his tongue._

"That's_ a Builder?" he asked skeptically, eyeing the humanoid creature with its domed head and enlarged eyes on stalks._

_She nodded. "I guess. Ugly little bastards, aren't they?"_

_Ashi, who had just been thinking that, recoiled slightly._

"_What do you seek, Revan?" the creature asked, oblivious to the insults passing in front of it._

_She felt a smile—cold and satisfied—crease the corners of her lips, as she opened her mouth to reply. "I seek the Star Forge," she replied coolly, a little grin seeping into her words at the thought of the object of their quest. "And I wish to see the Star Map."_

_It nodded, inclining its head. "Here is the map."_

_The hologram flickered and died; the next moment, the metal sections beside it ground apart, like some huge, dark flower, and the map lit around the levitating ball. She took in the coordinates it showed, nodding slowly. It made sense, little fragments piecing on to the rough outline Dantooine had given her. The Star Forge was one step closer._

"_Two down," she said to Malak, and even though he couldn't see her face, he knew she was smiling…_

When she awoke, it was with a jolt of sickening horror. She had dreamt about Revan and Malak again… but _why?_ She already knew where the map was; it wasn't like she needed extra help from the Force. And the thought of dreaming of a dead Sith wasn't her idea of a good night's sleep.

But she shook it off, and yawned, stretching and sitting up. Canderous, Jolee, and Juhani were already up, eating breakfast. Ashi picked up her own meal, scooping up several quick mouthfuls to catch up with them. "No one ever wakes me up," she muttered, to no one in particular.

"No one can, Lucas," Canderous replied, smirking.

Ashi ignored him. "We're going to look for the mad Wookiee today," she declared, setting down her half-eaten breakfast.

Jolee harrumphed and muttered something under his breath, but waved a hand at Ashi impatiently when she turned to ask him what he was trying to say, muttering, "More than meets the eyes."

She shook her head wearily. "You're very good at being cryptic, you know that?" she observed as she turned away, and he allowed himself a small, satisfied grin.

Soon they set out, and Jolee slowly and cantankerously guided them through the forest. "I don't remember exactly where he is," he said, by way of an excuse, "but I suspect he's somewhere around here. Was last time I checked, anyway."

An apprehensive silence followed his words. "And when was that?" asked Ashi nervously, giving him a sideways glance.

He shrugged. "Don't know. Two or three years, I suspect."

Her eyes widened in shock, and she spun to face him. "Two _years_?" she demanded. "That was two _years_ ago? He could be fracking anywhere by now!" Her voice was painfully loud in the forest, bouncing off the trees and sending a couple animals scurrying away through the underbrush. "What makes you think that he's going to be anywhere around here?" She crossed her arms, her expression murderous. "This is _hopeless_. We _can't_ search the _entire_ goddamn Shadowlands for…"

"Ashi?" interrupted Juhani suddenly.

"_What?_" she snapped, turning to face the Cathar.

Juhani bit her lip, and Canderous, grinning widely, moved his hand in a 'turn around' gesture. Ashi, immediately falling silent, turned on the spot, and her mouth dropped open. Towering over her, even more so than the Mandalorian captain or Chuundar, was a massive Wookiee, who clutched a worn but razor-sharp sword. His fur was matted and graying, tangled with foliage, and his eyes, barely visible, were shining with mad rage. Ashi swallowed, paling slightly.

"That's him," Jolee added helpfully.

**Cliffhanger! I'm pretty sure you can guess who this is (and who Ashi'll side with) so a hint of drama is still necessary.**_** And because of this, I will tell you that someone possibly dies next time. **__**Someone good**_**. **

**Hopefully that'll keep you interested. R&R, as always; reviewers get a quote. I'm away with no internet next week, so I'll update when I can, seeing as school's starting soon...**


	12. Liberation

**I'll start with a happy thought: thanks to everyone who reviewed. Then, a not so happy one: it's the last day before school. Thought I'd get this posted, since I now have exactly *no* study halls at all. I don't know how often I can update, but I'll work on it...**

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* * *

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**Liberation: being set free from influence or domination**

The enormous Wookiee was staring at Ashi with flat-out fury. /Czerka core-rats!/ he howled, and it took all her will not to flinch. /Is even the heart of Kashyyyk not free from your kind?/

"He's almost feral after all this time," Jolee murmured. He didn't sound quite as worried as Ashi felt he should be. "Calm yourself, Freyyr. We're friends; we mean you no harm. Don't you remember me?"

The Wookiee shook his massive head, lifting his sword. /I remember only that outsiders are not to be trusted. I'll see you dead!/ he snarled, leaping at Ashi with a roar that seemed to shake the very ground.

She ducked by an inch, and the next moment, a bright beam of blue light filled the woods, stopping his eager blow. Juhani, Jedi Guardian that she was and quickest on the uptake, had blocked Freyyr's attack. He turned to her and swiped at her with a huge paw, forcing her back, but Canderous had his blaster out, and fired several shots at the Wookiee.

"Don't kill him!" Ashi shouted, and he stopped in surprise. However, it didn't matter: Ashi had had time to recover by now, and threw out a hand, swiping it in a sharp circle. A whirlwind of dust and debris ensnared the Wookiee, and he howled in fury as he spun around. After a few moments, Ashi's hand began to tremble slightly—it was hard work to hold a fighting Wookiee—and she released, throwing him back several feet. The next moment, he found his sword flying from his hands, and to the ground at Jolee's feet.

Freyyr growled, but it was slightly less fierce than before. Jolee shook his head slowly. "Don't, Freyyr. You aren't a madclaw."

The Wookiee stopped, hesitating, and then hung his head. /I… I am beaten. Take my head, Czerka filth. You won't get another chance. So swears Freyyr of Kashyyyk/ he said bleakly.

Ashi sighed. /Oh, shut up. I'm not going to kill you unless you call me Czerka again. I don't even want to./

Freyyr looked doubtful, although he had done a double take when she switched to Shyriiwook. /The words of outsiders are tainted with lies. You can't convince me otherwise./

She shrugged. "I can try," she replied, and turned off her lightsaber, tucking it in her belt. "There's a start." She looked up at him, and grinned. "Hi. I guess you're Freyyr. My name's Ashi, and I have kind of a problem. Do you know Zaalbar and Chuundar?"

Freyyr stiffened instantly. /What? Those are my sons. Why do you speak their names? Tell me!/ he insisted sharply, and Ashi stepped back, hands up in a gesture of peace.

"I came here with Zaalbar," she replied. "And, uh… I met Chuundar here. They don't seem to like each other very much."

The Wookiee frowned. /To my shame, Zaalbar was exiled and enslaved./ He fixed Ashi with a fearsome glare. /Do you dare claim to be my son's owner, outsider?/

"My name is Ashi," she replied, her tone equally sharp. "I told you so you could call me that, instead of associating me with Czerka. And I'm no slaver, all right? Zaalbar swore me a lifedebt after I _rescued_ him _from _slavers."

/Does he?/ Freyyr looked slightly taken aback, and bowed his head thoughtfully. /Then perhaps he sees some worth in you, human, if you have earned a lifedebt from him. I will listen. Carefully. Gullibility has harmed me in the past/ he bleated mournfully. /If I had only seen the lies of Chuundar to begin with, he would have been exposed as a slaver… Zaalbar would not have been exiled./

"Yeah, about that," Ashi frowned. "No offense, but why didn't you believe Zaalbar? He seems a little more… trustworthy that Chuundar."

He hung his head in shame. /I believed the older son, as tradition dictated. The shame of Zaalbar's attack blinded me. I did not see the truth until it was far too late./ He sounded so miserable that Ashi couldn't muster anger. She crossed her arms instead.

"Tell me exactly what happened with Zaalbar. He found out about Chuundar, and that's why he attacked, right?"

Freyyr sighed. /Zaalbar saw it first. He found out that Chuundar was dealing with the Czerka slavers, leading them to our hunting parties. Chuundar would blame the disappearances on the dangers of the Shadowlands. Zaalbar was crazed when he found out. He attacked Chuundar with his claws./

"Madclaw," Ashi murmured, and the old Wookiee nodded.

/I thought he had gone mad—shed his honor. There was only one thing to do. I was bound by the old ways./

"So when did you learn the truth?" she continued.

/A year later. But by then, Chuundar had seen it coming; he had already spread lies of my own madness throughout my people. I had no allies when I confronted him./

"And he banished you?" she said, her face beginning to fill with understanding. It all made sense, an intricate plot by Chuundar where he seized power in the end. She didn't like him, but he was at least cunning; she'd give him that.

Freyyr growled resentfully, a low, dangerous sound in the back of his throat. /He and his Czerka guards attacked me. I had no choice but to flee to the deepest parts of the Shadowlands, and even there I was followed by their taint./

"And that's," Jolee broke in, "where I first saw him. I helped his pursuers lose him. Do you remember me now, Freyyr?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

The Wookiee nodded apologetically. /I think I do. I am sorry about attacking—all of you/ he added, nodding to the entire group. /It's been so long since I have offered my trust, or accepted that of someone else./

Ashi nodded. "So what now?" she wondered, and they all turned to look at her. "I mean, Chuundar has Zaalbar and another of my crewmates," she explained to the Wookiee. "And he's not going to let either one go until I kill you. Just what he said," she added quickly, as Freyyr tensed edgily.

/Then what happens now would depend on you, Ashi. You may either kill me, or you may decide I can yet benefit my people./

Ashi smiled. "I'm listening."

* * *

There was one way to challenge Chuundar that Freyyr described. It involved an ancient sword, an unslayable beast, and a quest. Ashi, naturally, was thrilled. Freyyr followed behind them as they set off; he wasn't fighting himself. She understood—he had his own things to work through.

For fresh blood to lure the beast out, they managed to obtain the body of one of the kinrath. The corpse looked reasonably acceptable as monster bait, but after Canderous, Juhani, and Ashi had each dragged it for a half-mile or so to the south, it was looking more the worse for wear, and she was slightly uncertain. Finally, just as one of the legs came off, they reached a clearing filled with dark, bloodstained earth. A large stone at the entrance bore an inscription in Shyriiwook.

Ashi skimmed it and then nodded. "This looks like the place." She pulled the bedraggled corpse forward unceremoniously, half-flinging it to the center of the clearing, before backing away. There was a moment of tense silence, and then she began, "I don't think it's…"

A massive, earth-shaking roar and the thudding of giant heavy footsteps interrupted her, and Jolee laughed. "Oh, I think it is," he replied with a grin, as the bushes at the opposite edge of the clearing began to shake.

His smile vanished a moment later, though, as the ritual beast became visible. It was huge and scaly, standing on two clawed feet. Ridged, serrated spikes trailed along its back, and it had long, yellowed claws stained with something dark. Glistening fangs hung from its mouth, covered in venom. Ashi swallowed hard, eyes widening.

"Damn, that's big," she muttered, at the same moment as Jolee exclaimed, "That's a terentek!"

"A wha—?" Ashi demanded, but she was cut off as the beast caught sight of them and abandoned the sad-looking kinrath for fresher prey. It charged at her, but Canderous fired a bolt of energy at the creature, distracting it. It spun for him, seeming irritated but unhurt by the shot that glanced off its hide.

Ashi threw out a hand and attempted to paralyze the creature, but as soon as the attack hit, she felt a draining sensation in her stomach and staggered dizzily. Jolee, watching, shook his head and called something.

"What?" she demanded, slowly recovering her balance.

"It feeds off of light and neutral Force energy," he repeated. "Don't try to fight it like that."

"Not dark?" she wondered, frowning, punctuating her question by hurling her lightsaber. It slashed across the beast's side, but the terentek seemed unhurt.

He shook his head. "It's a Sith-bred creature, made to hunt Jedi. They needed to make sure they could control it."

Ashi felt indecision welling inside her. She remembered all too well the Force lightning that had come to her when she was fighting the hive kinrath, and knew, though she didn't like to admit it, that she could summon it easily if she wanted to. _No_, she thought firmly. _I'm not dark._ Besides, she had told Carth she wouldn't. She didn't like to break a promise.

And the thought of Carth, as she lunged to try another attack and then ducked back away from its massive claws, make her think of Taris, which reminded her of the mutant rancor—after all, that was a little like a terentek, wasn't it? Only not bred to kill Jedi, which in this case and this case only, she was.

But it also made her remember how she had won that fight.

"I cannot harm it!" Juhani called, just as she grinned in inspiration.

"No, you can't. Its only weak point is inside it," she shouted back.

"How the hell do we kill it, then?" demanded Canderous, as he let fly a rapid fire that didn't help at all.

Ashi smiled. "Leave that to me," she instructed, knowing full well that this was the most dangerous role. "You have to distract it," she shouted, and they all doubled their attacks. She watched Juhani and Jolee begin to dance closer within reach at her words, and Canderous drew his sword instead. She spared them a moment of worry, and then hurried to the other side of the clearing, behind the terentek. It wasn't watching her. Now was her moment.

Using the Force to propel herself, she crouched and then leapt up in the air, landing just next to one of the massive spikes and narrowly avoiding impaling herself. If the beast hadn't noticed her before, it certainly did now. It roared furiously, and she had to grab the rounded front edge of the spike to avoid being thrown off.

It was rearing back, trying to get her to fall, but Ashi held on stubbornly and took hold of another spike, pulling herself up towards the head. Its only weak point was inside, so the only vulnerable point was its mouth.

Another shift, and she was high enough. She could see her friends darting around, trying to call its attention for long enough to give her an opening. They had figured out what she was doing. "Make it mad!" she called, and though they looked uncertain, they began to fight even harder.

Ashi saw it a moment before it happened, and pulled a frag grenade from her belt, activating it. The next second, the terentek threw back its head and roared, and she shifted up, throwing the grenade into its gaping mouth.

It stopped, and convulsed. Ashi leapt off immediately, and the next moment a huge but muffled explosion sounded. The terentek collapsed, and she hurried over, her eyebrows raised in surprise. "It's even that strong from the inside," she mused aloud, her eyes searching the length of the hide for anything metallic.

"Ashi?" called Juhani suddenly.

"One second," she replied; she had just caught sight of something silver extending from under its side. She reached over and tried to get a grip on it to pull it out.

"Ashi?" Juhani repeated, more urgently this time.

"Give me a sec!" she called again, mounting a foot against the side of the beast for leverage before tugging on the sword with both hands.

"Ashi!" Jolee exclaimed, and she half-turned, half-stumbled, as the legendary blade slid unexpectedly out of the side of the beast and sent her staggering.

"What?" she snapped, throwing up her hands as she spun to face them, but as she looked at _what_, all her words dried up.

Canderous was hunched on the ground, his hands over a wound on his stomach that was dripping blood, staining more of the ground. As she stared, he coughed hard, and more incomprehensible blood tricked from his mouth. She felt a flood of horror and disbelief. This couldn't possibly be happening.

He lifted his head and caught sight of her, and a shadow of a grin flickered over his face. "It's… not so bad," he said weakly. "I died… in a fight. An honorable death."

Ashi found her tongue suddenly as she rushed forward. "Yeah? Well, it'd be even more fracking honorable if you lived!" she snapped, shoving his arms aside to look at the wound. "Damn," she hissed. "I'm not a healer."

"It doesn't matter," Jolee replied. "Terentek venom doesn't respond to Force healing."

Ashi bit her lip. "What about regular healing? We have a medbay on our ship. If we get him there, can you heal him?"

Jolee shook his head sadly, sympathetically. "Lass, it's too fast. It'd normally spread and kill within the hour." He paused, and regarded Canderous curiously. "In fact, I'm surprised that he's not worse."

Ashi looked at her friend—gray-faced with irregular breathing, even as he put on a stolid face. It was hard to imagine that there could be worse.

"He should be beginning to feel the paralysis," Jolee said slowly. "He must be damn strong to hold out this…"

"Your implant!" Ashi exclaimed suddenly, and Canderous's face lit in realization. "He has a healing implant," she explained quickly to Jolee. "That could get us time, right?"

He said nothing. "_Jolee_!" she repeated.

"Maybe. I don't know how much. We'd need to get him back to your ship as fast as we can, and how we'll do that, I don't know. We're at least several hour's walk from the lift."

Ashi swallowed hard, gritting her teeth. "Freyyr will help us," she said resolutely, and lifted a hand to her mouth. "Freyyr!"

There was no answer, and Jolee swallowed, raising a hand. "Ashi…"

"Freyyr!" she shouted again, louder. /We need you, Freyyr!/

"It's a warrior's death, Lucas," Canderous rasped. "It's…"

She spun furiously to face him. "Don't you fracking _dare_ say it's okay!" she snapped through her teeth. "Freyyr! _Please!_"

And just as Jolee was about to try and stop her, there was a rustling, and then the Wookiee came racing through the trees, breathing heavily.

/What is it?/ he demanded, and Ashi gestured helplessly at Canderous. Freyyr stared at him, and then turned to her sadly. /I do not know what you can do/ he bleated. /The venom is lethal. Your friend has little time left./

She cut him off. "We can deal with that. We just need to get him to the docking bay. Can you help us?"

Unexpectedly, Freyyr smiled. /That is simpler than you think. The lift was here for the Czerka, but we who came before have other ways./

Ashi's eyes widened. "Oh. _Oh_," she murmured. "The trees."

He nodded. /I can bring your friend. And you, you are Jedi. You will be able to follow, won't you?/ She nodded, and Freyyr, to Canderous's objection, lifted him and swung his over his shoulder. The next moment, he scrambled up a root to the tree, dug his claws firmly into the wood, and began the climb. Ashi followed, but used the Force as she had with the terentek, giving her jumps power. The other two took her example, and the small group began to clamber through the trees.

Freyyr sensed that time was short, and moved with surprising speed. The other three were untiring as well, especially after Canderous slumped, unconscious, after a few minutes. Freyyr guided them from tree to tree, and as Ashi watched, she was amazed. This was so clearly where he belonged. How could anyone possibly take a Wookiee from here?

After just under what felt like an hour, they saw the walkway above them, and under Freyyr's guidance, they took a new route to near the docking platforms. Freyyr was hesitant to come in view of the Czerka men, but helped them as far as he could go. As soon as they were there, Jolee and Juhani took Canderous onto the Ebon Hawk, but Ashi stayed, pulling a sharp blade from her belt and handing it to Freyyr.

"Bacca's blade," she said. "Wait for me."

He nodded tersely, and she turned and hurried onto the ship.

* * *

Two days.

Both were spent on the Ebon Hawk, where Ashi drove everyone crazy with her restless combination of anxiety, frustration, and guilt over Canderous—after all, she had been the one to tell him to play bait. Her worry was for nothing, though: when he finally woke, his first words were to ask when they could go back out.

After Ashi had spend a long time calling him an idiot for the 'honorable death' remark, he had tried to get out of bed, and found to his horror that he hadn't escaped completely unscathed. He now had a somewhat noticeable limp in his left leg, a result of the venom and its paralyzing capacities, and this put him in a dangerously bad mood. Ashi and Jolee reminding him he was lucky to be alive didn't help his temper.

And he was even more infuriated when she refused, point blank, to take him out again, but he realized it was futile to argue after he was met time and time again by flat-out refusal. Ashi wasn't about to let him go anywhere. This did present the problem, however, that she needed someone good with ranged weapons for the upcoming Wookiee revolt. There was only one other option, and she wasn't exactly willing to ask his help.

As it turned out, though, she didn't need to, because he came to her.

She was sitting on her bunk, trying to relax and tune out Bastila—harder than it sounded—when she heard someone coming down the hall. Heavy footsteps, and not uneven, so she guessed who it was in an instant.

"What do you want?" she demanded, without opening her eyes.

"Is that how you greet everyone?" he asked. His tone was light and amused. Maybe he wasn't annoyed with her, then. She was slightly surprised; she _had_ left him as a babysitter. How much could she get away with?

"Only people I'm mad at," she replied, trying to ignore him. She couldn't help opening her eyes, though, when she heard him come closer, and then felt the foot of her mattress sink under his extra weight.

"What do you want, Carth?" she repeated in a monotone.

"I… I owe you an apology."

She raised her eyebrows. "Only one?"

Carth sighed. "Okay, well… maybe more than one. Look, I've… I've been kind of a jerk lately…"

"_Kind of_," she scoffed.

"All right," he said sharply, and she fell silent. "Look… I'm sorry. I've been being unfair to you and it's not your fault. I just… I feel so out of things now. I mean, you're a Jedi and there's three more of you, and I feel like there's nothing I can do to help. Sort of… unnecessary," he finished with a grimace.

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Oh, stop moaning, flyboy. You're only useless when you're sulking." However, there was a hint of forgiveness in her words, and he caught on to it. He also noticed, with a small grin, that it was the first time she'd called him flyboy since their argument on Dantooine.

"And I'm sorry," he repeated. "I hate not knowing what's going on and feeling this helpless. But I shouldn't take it out on you. I've, uh…" He paused, and grinned sheepishly. "I've been a pain in the ass lately, haven't I?"

Ashi couldn't help a smirk as she nodded. "You think?"

He laughed. "Well, I guess I should at least be pleased I haven't lost my touch."

"It never goes away. Take it from someone who knows."

A fleeting grin passed over Carth's face, but then it grew serious as he frowned. "So… I'm sorry, Ashi. Will you accept my apology?"

He felt immediately nervous, as a slow, mischievous grin crossed her face. "Hmm. Actually, I don't know," she replied coyly. "Maybe you should have to work for it a little."

"Oh? I don't know if I like the sound of that," he replied uncertainly, and she smirked.

"Well," she replied, "that's too bad, isn't it?" Her smile wasn't just mischievous any more; it was downright wicked. She shifted slightly closer, her eyes sparkling, and reached up a hand, running it along his jaw. "Because you want me to accept your apology, don't you?"

Her voice lowered as she spoke, until she was leaning closely to him just to make herself heard. To someone who knew her—and Carth placed himself in that category—it was a worrying expression, but he found himself more captivated than anything else. He was half-stunned, but half surprised with himself. Her fingers danced on the skin of his neck, making him ache to lean in, to close the space between them…

And then he felt a sharp smack upside the head, breaking the spell. Ashi laughed.

"Calm down, flyboy, I'm messing with you," she grinned, leaning away. Carth fought off the shock from before, and took her light mood as a good sign.

"So… you do accept my apology," he clarified, forcing calmness into his voice, and she nodded reassuringly. "Good—I'm glad." And he wasn't planning to say anything else, but somehow as he thought it, his mouth slipped open and the words tumbled out. "You know you, uh… you aren't so bad to have around, you know that?"

Ashi suddenly clapped her hands together, with the surprised but pleased face of someone who had just remembered something. "Ha!" she exclaimed with a playful grin. "I knew there was a reason that we kept you. But I know—I'm very charming, I'm told."

"Well… more than that," he murmured with a distracted smile. Ashi had time to frown in surprise, her eyes widening slightly, before he seemed to realize what he'd said.

He straightened nervously, and then made to get up. "You… you, uh, probably want to get going. I won't keep you." He turned away, but Ashi rolled her eyes, grabbing his arm as he stood up.

"Not without my backup," she said, and he stared, wondering if she meant what he hoped.

"I'm off babysitting duty?" he asked, his voice hopelessly enthusiastic.

She smirked. "Don't let Mission catch you saying that, but yeah. I need someone who can shoot all the things that try to kill me," she added, and he laughed.

"There's always plenty of those, somehow, isn't there?"

"Well, like I said. I'm charming." She grinned, and then got up. "But you're right, we should get going. After all, there's a bunch of Wookiees waiting for us, and a Jedi who's getting seriously pissed at me. We should go, before Freyyr gets tired of waiting."

He nodded and left the room. A moment later, she slumped tiredly as she went to grab her lightsaber, when the brat's tirade she had been ignoring exploded. _You're not allowed to think like that!_ Bastila informed her fiercely. _You're a Jedi!_

Ashi grimaced. She was rapidly realizing the disadvantages of having a Jedi in your head, and knew exactly what Bastila was referring to—not just messing with Carth, but the strange rush of delight that had gone through her when he'd added that last part. _More than that…_ It was something Ashi hadn't been expecting either, and the more she thought about it, the more confusing it became.

_Yeah, thank you, _Vrook_,_ she replied sharply. _Not like I can't help it. I'm human, aren't I?_

She felt the disagreement in Bastila's mind, sharp and resolute from years of reinforcement. _No, you are a Jedi. He's human._

Ashi shook her head in disgust. _You can't be a Jedi and a person?_

_It is a sacrifice that all Jedi must— _

_I'm not a Jedi,_ she snapped, before leaving the room, and with it leaving all her uncertainty as well.

* * *

She wasn't sure exactly how to find Freyyr again, and decided the best idea was to go down to the Shadowlands. The walk to the lift was monotonous and boring in comparison to her shortcut through the trees last time, but with Carth along, there wasn't much they could do besides walk. She reminded herself it was worth it, and trekked along the wooden walkway. Finally they reached the fork between the Wookiee village and the lift to the Shadowlands. To her surprise, several Wookiees were already there, and one of them stepped forward as she approached.

"You're Gorwooken, aren't you?" she asked, and his lip curled slightly as he bit back a snarl.

/And you are the human who is siding with the madclaw. Freyyr has returned; he is already winning support from those who dislike Chuundar./ He shook his head angrily. /And you, human—why else would he dare come from hiding? You are the only thing that has changed./

"Plenty's changed," Ashi replied sharply. "Or didn't you notice Czerka?"

Gorwooken growled in the back of his throat. /Kashyyyk needs no more violence/ he said, and it was not only anger coloring his tone. /I only want this to end. Chuundar has promised that. When he is in charge, there is no war with the outsiders./ His voice had shifted to fierce conviction, and Ashi felt an unexpected sorrow at the lies he had been twisted to believe.

"You can't honestly believe that! They're slavers! They take your people and sell them away!"

Gorwooken shook his head. /You say this, human, but what proof can you give us? I know that with Chuundar is charge, there is peace! You would start a war, human. You would sacrifice the lives of a race you do not understand because of your own ideas on how they should live!/

Ashi glared. "And you'd abandon your age-old morals for a little peace and quiet! Sometimes, good things come at a cost."

Her tone and face softened suddenly. "Come on. Don't do this. You've been lied to, but we're going to stop that, me and Freyyr and Z." She bit her lip, and added in Shyriiwook /You have to believe me./

There was a long moment where Gorwooken stared her with uncertainty, his face torn, but then he shook his head sharply, closing his eyes, and the spell was broken. /Kashyyyk doesn't need war!/ he roared, and the few Wookiees behind him roared too.

Ashi's face twisted in pain, but she shook her head resolutely. "Kashyyyk doesn't need slavers," she replied, staring the Wookiee defiantly in the eyes.

Gorwooken snarled. /You should have followed the will of Chuundar!/ he replied. /Now face his wrath!/ He roared and lunged for her, but before she even had her lightsaber out to fight, there was a flash of red light and Gorwooken staggered, clutching his chest. Carth cocked his blaster again, waiting for her, and Ashi grimaced and nodded. The battle was short and quick, but Ashi felt an uncomfortable sense of guilt as they continued onward towards the village. Those Wookiees were young and gullible, but they shouldn't have had to die for it. Chuundar was going to pay for that one.

As they rounded another corner that twisted between the trees, she saw another figure, this one alone. _Please, not another Chuundar fan_, she thought desperately, but then he began to speak, and she was reassured.

/You are Ashi?/ he said, and she nodded. /My name is Chorrawl. It seems you are stronger than we thought. Freyyr has returned, and told me of what you did for him. We have begun to fight among ourselves/ he bleated sadly.

Ashi grimaced internally. This really was hurting everyone, wasn't it? But the Wookiee, possibly seeing that she looked upset, added /Human, I believe you have done the right thing in helping Freyyr. For a long time I had known of the slavers, but could not speak against it. This may change that/ he said, and he sounded so hopeful that she felt a smile forming on her face.

Maybe she had done all right.

* * *

Chorrawl led them to the chieftain's hall, and Ashi hurried in, Carth, Jolee, and Juhani on her heels. She could see Freyyr and Chuundar at the front of the room, with Zaalbar and the brat in the background, and a crowd of Wookiees in front of them.

Shoving forward, she caught the end of Chuundar saying something in his silky, dangerous tone. /It's a reunion!/ he exclaimed. Though he smiled, there was a deep undercurrent of anger in his voice.

Freyyr spoke up, nodding. /Yes, son/ he replied, his tight grip on the blade of the sword the only evidence of emotion. /By the blade of Bacca's sword, I've come to end your treachery. No more will you sell your own people!/ he roared, and several of the Wookiees at the edges of the room barked agreement. They were silenced by a glare from Chuundar, before he spoke again.

/Ah. You have the blade of Bacca's sword—very clever. Unfortunately/ he smirked /it makes no difference. I have the hilt, held by each true chieftain! Even you claimed it was all-important!/ he added, with a note of triumph, and Freyyr hesitated for a second, caught in the middle of his own argument. /And who will the people follow now? You? You, old, and weak?/

/Both of you shut up!/ snapped Zaalbar suddenly, and all eyes turned to him in surprise. /This ends today!/ he said firmly. /I will not see Kashyyyk suffer any more!/

"You tell 'em, Z!" Ashi cheered, and the Wookiees glanced over at her blankly. Chuundar's look was a glare, but when Zaalbar turned, his voice was suddenly unsure.

/I don't know what to do, Ashi/ he said desperately. /Chuundar has been telling me things… he makes sense… I think. I don't know!/

Ashi threw up her hands in frustration. /Do you have to fight?/ she demanded, the image of Gorwooken rising to mind. /Talk it through! It's not like we need war or anything, Z./

Jolee was nodding slowly, approvingly. "Good, lass."

Carth frowned. "What did she say?"

"She's trying to prevent a fight," he replied. "She says they don't need violence."

"_Ashi_ doesn't want to fight?" Carth began, sounding as surprised as he felt, but he was cut off by Chuundar.

/No!/ the Wookiee barked. /None of your pathetic compromise!/ All the relaxed silkiness had gone as he snarled /Make your choice, Zaalbar!/

Zaalbar looked over at Ashi, grimacing, his eyes pained, and she shook her head gently. "I think you know."

He nodded assuredly. /Then there is no other way. Chuundar!/ he growled, rage rising in his tone. /You have betrayed our people! Now you must pay!/

Freyyr was smiling, an expression new to his face. /That's my boy!/

/So be it/ snapped Chuundar. /I have Czerka; you have your weak has-been. We'll see who dies today!/

He lunged for Zaalbar, but his brother drew his own sword, and blocked him. Ashi shrugged—if they had to fight, they had to fight—and drew her violet lightsaber, unwilling to be left out of the battle.

Freyyr was fighting the other Wookiees, and so were Juhani and Jolee; Carth had his blasters out and was picking off whatever of Chuundar's men he could get a shot at. Ashi zoned in on the Czerka guards, and quickly cut down the ones at the end of the room, giving one of the corpses a disgusted kick as it fell.

"Slavers," she muttered, before she felt a figure behind her and spun, gutting a Wookiee who had been about to stab her. As she surveyed the room, her eyes were drawn to the battle between Zaalbar and Chuundar, by far the most intense. As she watched, though, Chuundar reached in with a massive paw and slashed across Zaalbar's face. She couldn't stifle a cry of horror as blood began to mat her friend's fur.

/Madclaw!/ Zaalbar roared, and then lunged in again, growling /Who will they follow _now_, brother?/

But Chuundar seemed already to have realized there was no chance for him, and he simply swiped again at his brother, his face contorted in fury. Ashi couldn't help a feeling of worry. She couldn't possibly just kill Chuundar now—it was Zaalbar's fight—but on the other hand, if Chuundar was fighting dirty, she didn't want him hurt.

"Hey, madclaw!" she yelled, and as Chuundar turned to look at her, she shoved him back with the Force, and called, "Yours, Z!"

And Zaalbar understood. In a moment he darted forward, and then Chuundar was staring in shock at the blade through his heart.

/No…/ he bleated, lifting a paw to his chest in stunned disbelief, and then he fell to the floor of the hall, dark blood pooling around his body. Zaalbar stared down at the corpse with a mixture of disgust and regret. Ashi approached tentatively, and then held out a hand.

"Let me get that, Z," she offered, and in a spark of light, the blood on his face stopped flowing. He nodded gratefully, still looking overwhelmed.

/We have done it/ he said slowly. /I am sorry it came to this, but it could not continue./

Freyyr put a paw on his shoulder. Zaalbar looked up at his father uncertainly, and Freyyr sighed. /Zaalbar, my son, I am truly sorry. I was blind… no. I have no excuse./

Zaalbar looked up at his father slowly. /I can forgive/ he replied. /I have learned a lot over the years./ There was a slow, happy moment, where the two both smiled at each other, and then Ashi cleared her throat.

"So, uh… what're you doing, Z?" she asked. "Because if you want to stay here, I get it and all…"

/You have a place at my side, Zaalbar/ Freyyr offered. /I would be honored if you would take it./

Zaalbar paused. His face twisted in indecision, and he opened his mouth and closed it several times before shaking his head unexpectedly. /I can't. I'm just getting used to being free—and not just from slavers. And I have a lifedebt/ he added, looking over at Ashi. /Now my life is truly my own, it is all the more important to honor that./

Freyyr grinned and clapped Zaalbar on the back. /Listen to my son!/ he exclaimed with pride. /His insight humbles me. Take that good judgment with you, and all the planets will come to revere Wookiee wisdom./

Ashi gave up trying to hide a grin of relief, and threw her arms around Zaalbar. "Good to have you back, Z," she said, and he bleated agreement. Then, pulling away, she turned to Freyyr.

"I think it's time I was going," she said, shrugging. "I kind of have something I have to do." It was with a jolt that everyone remembered the Star Map, and then nodded.

Freyyr held out a hand. /Perhaps, but first I must see to your reward. You have done us a great service. Kashyyyk will remember you long past your lifetime. Actually/ he said, shaking his head in respect, /I am not sure there is a reward that accurately reflects what you have done, Ashi Lucas. Our world is changed because of you./

/I have a request, father/ Zaalbar piped up. /I have thought about it a great deal. I would like Bacca's sword./

Ashi paused, and then nodded with a smile. "Yeah. That's fitting, I think."

Freyyr frowned. /Well… that is quite a request, but... perhaps I should consider it an investment. Zaalbar… do you understand what this will mean? This sword is held by chieftains… and future chieftains./

Zaalbar nodded. /I know. I want this, father, I understand. And I will bring it back one day, I promise./

Freyyr smiled. /I have no doubt. See!/ he roared suddenly, turning to the crowd. /Let the two halves of the blade be made whole. My son shall hold Bacca's blade!/

The crowd erupted into cheers as Freyyr pressed the handle and blade together and offered it to Zaalbar, who took it reverently.

/Thank you/ he replied, and Freyyr nodded.

/Good luck, my son/ he bleated, and Zaalbar was smiling as he turned to leave.

* * *

They had hardly stepped into the Ebon Hawk's dock before a clatter of footsteps and a cry of "Zaalbar!" told them Mission had been waiting. A blue blur came flying down the docking bay and threw her arms around him, burying her face in his fur.

/It's all right, Mission/ Zaalbar mumbled. /I'm fine./

Mission pulled away immediately. "You're not _fine_!" she cried. "Look at your _face_! What, you get mauled by a Kath hound or something?"

/My brother, actually/ Zaalbar replied, and Mission's mouth dropped open.

"What in space happened? Did you rescue him without me?" she demanded, and Ashi watching in amusement as she dragged Zaalbar inside. "You are going to tell me everything… and then you're going to take a shower, Z. You smell like a sewer."

/I smell like a Wookiee!/ Zaalbar objected, and then the rest of the conversation was lost as they entered the ship.

Ashi gazed after them, grinning. "I love that kid," she muttered, to no one in particular, before motioning the rest of them away. "Okay, Jolee—show us where the Star Map is."

"All the way back to the Shadowlands?" he objected moodily. "I'm too old for this, damn it."

"You're coming with us," Ashi replied evenly, "then you've got to work for it."

They reached the Shadowlands by evening, but Ashi was reluctant to stop, and they pressed on for several hours, even when the light faded from its usual dark gray to a near-pitch black. She felt a nagging sense of drawing closer, but couldn't explain it to them, without having to explain the déjà vu on Dantooine, too. And she still wasn't too enthusiastic about the idea of them thinking she was crazy.

Then again, the looks they were giving her were making her think they might think that anyway, and eventually she sighed and stopped as they reached a clearing.

"You know, I think we'll call it a day," she said, and her friends hid their relief as they laid down sleeping mats and began to doze off. For the second time, Ashi found herself in the Shadowlands, looking up at the tree cover amidst her friends' snores. It was a beautiful planet, really, and even better minus Czerka. For a moment she wondered how the Wookiee rebellion was going, and then her eyes slipped shut.

* * *

_She was in Alek's warm, strong arms, lying in the grassy fields of Dantooine…_

No… she was on Kashyyyk, in the Shadowlands… so whose arms were around her?

She slowly felt the fuzziness of deep sleep wearing off, and with a jolt realized who it was. She was tempted to wake him up, but that was so potentially embarrassing that she shook off the thought and tried to squirm free. It didn't work—his arms tightened around her, and she rolled her eyes, before jabbing him in the side with her elbow.

"Carth!" she hissed, but he kept snoring. "_Carth! Wake… up!_" She punctuated each word with another jab. Hearing a snicker, she glanced over—Jolee was watching with an huge grin.

"Help!" she whispered furiously, but the old man shook his head, and Juhani seemed to be fighting the urge to smile. Luckily, Carth chose that moment to come to.

"What…?" he mumbled sleepily, and then realized why he'd been so rudely awakened. He scrambled back, flushing, and Ashi pulled away, getting to her feet.

"Thanks for the help, Jolee," she muttered.

"You looked tired," he objected with a grin. She shook her head exasperatedly.

"Well, since you're not, come on. We're going to go find the Map now," she said, with vindictive pleasure, and he rolled his eyes.

From his mat, Carth replied, "Come on, beautiful, five minutes." Jolee's smirk widened at the nickname, and for once Ashi was grateful for the darkness of the forest; it hid the unintentional blush that spread across her cheeks. She ignored Jolee's knowing look and picked up her bag.

"Get up," she said, nudging him with her foot, and he got slowly to his feet. "I don't want to miss the Wookiee revolt." Her friends obligingly got together their things while she watched them impatiently. The nagging sense of being close to the Map, and of recurring déjà vu, had built up overnight, and it was making her edgy. Finally, they began on their way. A few minutes in, Ashi glanced over at Jolee. "How far?"

He harrumphed. "You young people are too impatient. Be quiet and walk faster."

"I have a question."

"What?"

"You said you're not a Jedi," Ashi began, "but you use the Force, and you're not a Sith. What do you call yourself?"

Surprisingly, he chuckled. "Why? You looking to join me?"

"Maybe," she shrugged. "And Bastila wants to know why you're not on the dark side."

"She would," he muttered. "It's not that hard. I haven't fallen all these years, have I? And light side, dark side—I don't see in absolutes. I'm what you'd call a Gray Jedi."

Both Ashi and Bastila, through her head, were listening intently, but Ashi didn't see Jolee watching her as well. He was interested to see how she thought of this—before, after all, she hadn't minded blurring the lines.

"So what about Malak? Isn't he evil?"

"Of course he is. There's no doubt about that, and I want to stop him as much as you. But I don't think I need to be a Jedi to do it. Look at your soldier," he offered, gesturing at Carth. "He's not a Jedi, and he's with us. All living things have capacity for good or evil. I don't think being a Jedi, or a Sith, or Republic, will change what you are."

Ashi nodded, after a pause. "That was deep."

He grinned wryly. "Well, I've had a while to think on it," he said. "What about you? Are you interested in the Gray Jedi?"

She considered that. It certainly sounded good to be a Jedi without being a _Jedi._ "I think—" she began, but stopped suddenly. A distant shimmer of blue had appeared through the mist. Juhani and Carth looked uncertain, but Jolee and Ashi stepped forward, and she murmured without thinking, "It's _here_."

Thankfully, none of them seemed to think it meant anything more than that they had found the map, and they stepped forward. Ashi's suspicions were recognized—it was the Builder from her dream that was regarding them aloofly.

"Life forms detected… determining parameters…"

Jolee nodded as she took a few steps closer. "That's the thing. Obstinate machine. I've no doubt it holds what you seek, but good luck getting it operational."

Just as he spoke, the holo said, "Initiating neural scan," and a horizontal beam of blue light projected from the machine, scanning Ashi head to toe. She stiffened uncertainly.

"Primary neural recognition complete," the creature said after a moment. "Preliminary match… found."

Jolee's eyes widened. There was no proof past this; he'd seen the damn Sith pair lock it last time before they left. As the others saw his surprise, though, he muttered quickly, "Match found? It always muttered something about 'rejected patterns' for me!"

Ashi shrugged. "I must be special," she replied, and he bit back a grin at the irony. _More than you know_.

"Begin socialized interface," the machine said, and then flickered, before its eyes zeroed in on Ashi, who was staring suspiciously back at it. "Greetings. This terminal has not been accessed for quite some time."

"Yeah," she nodded, "I know. How come it's working for me?"

It frowned—or at least looked like it, as the stalked eyes were hard to read. "Error. Subject displays unfamiliarity with environment. Behavioral reconfiguration will be needed before access."

It flickered again, and then bowed its head. "I am sorry. I did not mean to confuse you. I will answer your questions to the best of my programmed ability."

Ashi nodded slowly. "Mm-hm. What's behavioral reconfiguration?"

"I have been programmed with a very limited field of knowledge. I have been… edit: must restrict access to only those who fit my required pattern."

Ashi nodded. "I think it's locked. By Revan, I guess." She looked up at the holo. "Uh… computer, who last accessed this interface?"

"Sorting by identity. Three attempts by the Wookiee Freyyr, all denied. 152 attempts by human Jolee Bindo, all denied."

Ashi looked over at Jolee, smirking. "Persistent, aren't we?"

He shrugged. "Call me stubborn. There wasn't exactly much else to do around here ."

"Error…" the machine beeped again. "List of access attempts prior to these is corrupted. Likelihood of removal by user, 100%. Error: data concerning subject "Revan" is corrupted."

Ashi nodded. "Revan was here, then," she said, but she didn't sound surprised. She had known already that what she had seen had been real. "Okay," she said, looking up at the holo with determination. "I'm looking for a Star Map."

"Accessing. Yes, I have found a Star Map in original system memory. Access is restricted."

"Naturally."

"Your request requires additional security access," it replied. "You must be made to match the parameters I have been supplied. If you do not fit these parameters, you are not worthy of further access. You will be rejected as unsuitable."

"And what exactly does… rejection mean?"

It paused. "Access unavailable. If you have further questions, ask them now. Access will terminate with success or failure of evaluation." But Ashi shook her head, and the holo shrugged. "Access commencing. Results will be compared against a pattern in memory. Simply act as you should."

She nodded, and it began. "You travel with a Wookiee, and have encountered complications. Hypothetical: You and Zaalbar are captured and separated. If you both remain silent, one year of prison for each of you. However, call Zaalbar a traitor, and he will serve five years, while you serve none. And if you both accuse the other, you both serve two years. What do you do?"

Ashi stared. "How'd you know about Z?"

It shook off her question. "This facility has many information-gathering capabilities that extend far beyond the planet. Please answer the question."

She crossed her arms. "I trust Z. We'd both keep our mouths shut."

"Are you _certain_?" it asked. "You would trade the possibility of two or no years for the certainty of one or five?"

She shrugged. "If it was real life, then my friends would break us out. So yeah, we'd stay quiet."

It shook its head, eyes wobbling. "This is an incorrect answer."

Ashi's mouth dropped open. "What do you mean, _incorrect_? It's a personality quiz! You can't _fail_ that!"

"You do not match the profile I have been programmed to recognize," it replied unsympathetically. You will receive one more chance before failure. Second question: you are at war with a…"

Ashi shook her head. "No fracking _way_. I am _not_ just going to sit here, and listen to an overgrown frog tell me I have a deficient personality. I think I'll take you apart and get the Map myself." To accentuate her point, she reached for her lightsaber.

"Failure!" the holo shrieked frantically. "Activate defenses!"

The next moment the metal chamber behind it slid open, and a flood of droids poured out. While they looked threatening, however, they weren't at all hard to kill, and Ashi turned back to the holo as the last one exploded into sparks.

"I want my Star Map," she said firmly.

It paused, ignoring her and murmuring, "Processing," but then nodded. "Identity confirmed. During the fight, your mind displayed the neural pattern I was searching for. Welcome. The Star Map is yours."

Ashi frowned in surprise. "Oh. Good," she said slowly, approaching the map. It creaked open, just like in her dream. Carefully, she scrutinized it, before nodding. "That makes sense," she muttered, entering the new coordinates on her datapad. Then she turned back to her friends.

"We got what we came for. Let's go," she said, and they nodded in agreement, turning away from the blue holo, to leave the Shadowlands for the last time.

When they reached the docking bay, it was evening, and Mission greeted them, back to her usual chirpiness. "Czerka Corp's gone," she said happily, but then frowned. "They wouldn't let me help, though."

"I missed it?" Ashi cried, her disappointment obvious, and Mission nodded.

"And the party," she added smugly.

"Bet that was exciting," Ashi muttered, following the girl onto the ship with a tired grin. When everyone was on board, Ashi and Carth made their way to the cockpit. She hurried ahead and claimed the pilot chair, sliding into it as Carth objected halfheartedly.

"I never get to fly," she replied petulantly, and, rolling his eyes, he took the other seat and began to run through system checks.

"Where are we going next?" he asked lightly, but just as Ashi was about to reply, she felt a rush of lightheadedness, and heard a cold, metallic voice murmuring, '_Korriban next, I think_'.

"Korriban," she blurted, and he raised his eyebrows at her choice.

"The Sith planet? Are you sure?"

"I think so," she murmured. She felt an irrational sense of certainty about the planet. "I think… that I have to."

He frowned, but shrugged. "Whatever you say, beautiful" he replied, and began to flick on the navigation system.

Bastila, listening curiously from the hallway, felt a sinking dread in her stomach. _The same route as before. She's walking in her old footsteps_, she thought with a flutter of trepidation. _How long can it be before she finds out?

* * *

_

**Foreshadowing... although if I was really good at it, I wouldn't have said the name of the planet.  
****Oh, and for the record, I mentioned a near death, not a death. Like I would kill Canderous...**

**R&R, please; or even just the first part is good, but reviews are always great ;)  
**


	13. Infiltrate

**did anyone else forget how much they hated school? because I did. bleh.**

**Infiltrate: to move into territory surreptitiously, esp. with hostile intent**

"You shouldn't do that," Bastila hissed, as they hurried down a hallway. "The Sith have all jurisdiction here."

They had just met their first Sith of Korriban, a trainee by the name of Shardaan. Ashi had talked him out of killing a group of hopefuls, but subsequently pissed him off when she made a couple comments about his intelligence, or lack of. Bastila was not impressed.

"I'm terrified," Ashi muttered. "Come on, what's he going to do—gloat at me?"

Jolee snickered, and Bastila scowled at the two of them. "You aren't taking this seriously!"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Fine. Time to be _serious_, guys," she instructed, disdain obvious in her voice. However, despite her annoyance, her next words were, in fact, commanding and to the point. "We'll split up. Ask about ruins, caves, and tombs… that kind of thing. Oh, and don't piss off the guys in uniform." After a pause, she amended, "Well, not a lot. We can meet at the cantina," she suggested.

Nodding grudgingly, they set off to scout out the small colony. However, she herself had only gone a few steps when a Rodian stepped in her way. "What?" she challenged, although, on closer inspection, he didn't look like a Sith.

/You, human, you are the one flying the Ebon Hawk? Yes, I saw you disembark/ he muttered as she nodded, in his strange echoing chatter.

"Yeah, it's mine," she replied, unable to stifle a note of pride in her voice. "Who wants to know?"

/Is that so./ His gaze shifted to annoyance. /Well, you can tell _Mister _Kang that my people are splitting plasma over this. He's been late for his runs over a few months now; it's a disaster!/

Ashi grinned, the smug look of someone with valuable information. "Hate to break it to you, but no one's telling _Mister_ Kang anything. One, he's dead, and two, I'm not one of his people anyway."

The Rodian frowned, looking confused—although, to be fair, it was hard to tell. /Wait… you're not one of his smugglers? Who are you working for?/

"I'm… freelance."

/Ah/ he said slowly. /And the Hawk?/

"My needs were greater than his."

His oversized eyes widened, and then he laughed. /Good for you, human. I didn't think that anyone could get that ship from him. But to be honest, I don't really care. I'm somewhat more interested in a business matter./

"Like?" Ashi's tone was casual, and betrayed none of the nostalgia she was suddenly feeling.

/It is a simple courier mission/ he explained. /Motta the Hutt on Tatooine awaits a delivery of a box that I hold. I simply request that you take it to him. There is absolutely no danger involved… unless, of course, you are to open the box yourself. I am sure Motta will pay you upon delivery. I believe it was worth 2000 credits, or the like./

Ashi would have taken the deal no matter what, but she couldn't help asking. "What happens if I open the box?"

He shrugged. /I am repeating what I heard. I would advise that you do not./

_Fat lot of good_ advice _does._ "Okay," she replied. "I'll do it,."

/Very good. I will have my men load it onto your ship. It will be there waiting for you./

Ashi nodded and turned to walk away, trying in vain to curb her curiosity as he called, /Remember, human, _do not open the box_!"

The rest of her scouting mission was painfully unhelpful, and filled with snobby Sith who she had to work hard not to kill. After about an hour, she gave up and headed to the cantina. Carth was already waiting, wearing the same bored expression as her.

"No luck?" he asked, as she took a seat beside him.

"Nope, nothing." She was slightly reluctant to tell him about the box, simply because she knew he would tell her not to open it, and that was the last thing she needed. "Maybe Jolee and Bastila found something, though," she added hopefully. He nodded distractedly, something catching his attention. Ashi followed his gaze, and saw Bastila making her way towards them. "Speak of the devil," she muttered.

Bastila sat down obliviously. "I found…" she began, but stopped. Ashi was eyeing something over her shoulder.

"Don't look now," she murmured under her breath, "but a bunch of idiots are about to try and look impressive." Bastila glanced over, and Ashi shook her head pityingly. "Damn, brat; how hard is it to not look?"

Bastila was stopped from replying when the Sith approached. A blonde, who seemed to be the leader, spoke first, her voice as haughty as her face.

"Oh, look," she said, gazing coldly at the group. "It seems we have some newcomers to our little colony. No doubt looking to join the academy." Her skeptical look made it clear what she thought of their chances. "And," she added mockingly, as her gaze turned to Ashi, "led by a _Jedi_, no less."

"Hey, watch who you're calling Jedi," Ashi snapped, but they didn't seem to hear.

"I hate Jedi," said one Sith contemptuously, "and the fallen ones are worse. They're always accepted, and they think they're _better_ than the rest of us."

"Who says I'm not?" Ashi wondered with a smirk, prompting a quick transferal of all the attention to her. "Why don't you go find someone else to terrify," she continued to the blonde, leaning back in her seat and smiling coolly. "You don't want the kind of trouble we'll give you." All this was said calmly, but her eyes were cold and threatening, like thin ice.

The girl snorted delicately. "Smart-mouthed newcomers, to boot."

"Looks pretty fresh to me, Lashowe," agreed the third Sith, a dark-skinned man about Ashi's age. Lashowe flicked her hair over her shoulder, returning Ashi's icy gaze.

"That's what I thought, too. Well, I don't know if you've heard, stranger, but here on Korriban, the Sith do as they pleased. And _we_ are Sith."

"Oh, I'd worked that one out. Combination of the ugly uniforms and the obnoxious accents, I think."

Lashowe's gray eyes, the same color as the uniform Ashi had just insulted, narrowed. "Quite literally," she snapped, "whether you live or die depends on our every whim. What do you think of that?"

"I don't know," mused Ashi. "Seems like an awful lot of responsibility for a bunch of scum like you."

Lashowe's fists clenched, and her gaze was nothing short of murderous, but she said nothing. Her friends were not so restrained: one's hand twitched toward his lightsaber, and it was only when he glanced at Lashowe that he managed to restrain himself.

Bastila's face pinched in frustration and she nudged Ashi under the table. "Be careful! Are you trying to provoke them?"

Ashi, considering it justified, elbowed Bastila back. Carth snorted. "You don't think they're a bit pre-provoked to begin with?"

Slowly and deliberately, the Sith girl leaned closer to them, glaring directly at Ashi; she in turn grinned, inviting a threat with amusement. "I would listen to your friend, stranger, and not make us angry. Do you know exactly how many Sith there are on Korriban?"

"Twelve! No, wait, thirteen!"

Ashi laughed as Jolee approached the table. "Good one, old man."

"Thank you," he said gruffly, taking the compliment in stride. "It takes effort to be properly irreverent at my age."

The insult seemed too much for one Sith, and lightning sparked at his fingertips. "Enough to crush the life out of you, fool!" he barked at Jolee, but Lashowe held up a delicate hand.

"Oh, look. I think one of them just attempted to make a joke. How precocious."

"I didn't think it was funny," drawled the dark-skinned Sith.

"Neither did I," Lashowe nodded. "A brave face, perhaps, but I'm more interested in being amused at the moment. What do you think?" she asked, turning to Ashi and her friends and arching an eyebrow. "Amuse us. Make us laugh, and we might just consider allowing you to live."

"What do I think?" Ashi grinned widely, savoring the moment. "I think you should be careful. You might be heading for a little more trouble than you can handle."

"_What?_" Lashowe demanded, but the dark-skinned man laughed. "I think that someone just stood up to you, Lashowe," he chuckled.

She glared at him. "Shut up, fool! Unless you want to be next!"

"Yeah? Anytime!"

The other Sith, who had stayed quiet since Lashowe's brush-off, piped up. "Oh, this is boring. Let's go just back to the academy."

Lashowe spared one final scowl for Ashi. "Fine. We'll go. But don't think I'll forget about you, stranger," she added, before stalking away.

Unsurprisingly, Bastila was frowning. "You took an incredible risk. You know that, don't you?"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Worked, didn't it?"

"Yeah, cute," Carth agreed. "Maybe next time, you should try juggling."

Ashi laughed, but then frowned. "Jolee, Bastila. Did you have any luck?"

As it turned out, they did. Both of them had discovered roughly the same thing—there were ancient Sith ruins up on the surface, in a place called the Valley of the Dark Lords, but only Sith students were allowed there, and they were accepted by a Twi'lek called Yuthura Ban. Ashi's grin widened as they spoke.

"So, to get the Star Map, we have to become Sith," she mused when they'd finished. "Nice. Undercover missions."

Bastila stared. "_Nice?_ This mission could affect the fate of the galaxy! It's not…"

"Carth? Carth Onasi?"

A man interrupted, approaching their table. Carth looked up and his mouth fell open. "Jordo?"

"It is you!" Jordo exclaimed happily. "I knew it when I laid eyes on you. You old spacedog, how've you been? I thought for sure you'd be out fighting on some ship out there."

Bastila was glaring and mourning her stillborn lecture, but by now no one was paying her a shred of attention. Carth shrugged. "I was. I crashed."

Laughing, Jordo shook his head. "That's pretty rich. Can't imagine what it would take to keep you on the ground." Then, noticing the rest of them, Ashi in particular, he smiled and added, "Must have something to do with your pretty friend here, huh?" He nudged Carth playfully, before nodding to Ashi. "How do you do, miss?"

He offered her a hand, and she shook it, grinning. "Friend of Carth's, I guess?"

"So…" Carth frowned. "What're you doing here, Jordo? The last time I saw you was on… Telos, actually."

Jordo's face grew immediately solemn. "Yeah… it's a shame about home. Telos still hasn't recovered. But the family and I moved on, and I'm working for Czerka now."

Ashi kicked Carth under the table at this, raising her eyebrows, and he shrugged apologetically.

But Jordo had remembered something, and his face darkened further. "Uh… what I mean is, condolences about your wife. I heard what happened."

Ashi froze, stunned. Her mouth dropped open, and she only managed to swallow the words '_you had a _wife_?'_ when she looked over at Carth. His face was as pale and drawn, and she could see his jaw tighten as Jordo spoke. She didn't even look at his eyes—she didn't want to.

Jordo smiled hopefully; he wasn't done. "But at least your son made it out all right."

This was too much for Ashi, who blurted in near-comical shock, "You have a _son_?" Bastila and Jolee stared at her, but Carth had only eyes for Jordo.

"My… son? You mean… Dustil?"

His friend nodded. "Sure. I saw him the other day, right here. He didn't recognize me, but I knew him. Looks just like his old man." But then Carth's shock seemed to register with him, and he added, "You didn't, uh, _know_ he was here?"

"No!" Carth replied, his voice still stunned. "Jordo, Dustil's been missing since the attack on Korriban! Are you… are you absolutely sure it was him?"

"Yeah!" Jordo insisted, looking affronted. "I'd recognize Dustil anywhere!" But then he glanced away, twining and knotting his fingers nervously. "He's, uh… he's joined the Sith, Carth."

Carth stared. "What do you mean, he's joined the Sith?" he demanded, even as Ashi considered that that really only had one possible meaning.

"The academy here," Jordo replied, looking more anxious than ever. "I saw him with the other students. He was suited up in their outfit and everything. Sorry," he said, grimacing. "I thought you knew."

Carth shook his head slowly. His face was blank, but Ashi could see his jaw clenching. His hand, which had been resting on the table, was now clutching the edge of it, so tightly the knuckles turned white.

"No," he replied slowly, his voice forcibly calm. "No. I didn't know. Thank you for telling me, Jordo."

"Yeah, uh… no problem. Look, I should, uh, probably get going." Ashi didn't blame him for wanting to leave, after dropping a bombshell like that. "Good to see you again, Carth," he murmured. "And, um, good luck with Dustil."

The moment his friend walked away, Carth turned to Ashi, his gaze far away. "Dustil… Dustil is in the academy!" he murmured, as if it were too good to be true. "All this time I thought he was gone… he must be almost a man by now…" His face suddenly became worryingly resolute as he said, "We have to go find him."

Ashi bit her lip. "Carth, are you sure that's a good idea?"

He stared at her. "What? Of course it's a good idea! He's my son! We have to go and find him right now!" He made to get up, but Ashi grabbed his arm.

"You can't go storming off into the academy!" she hissed. "That's suicide! I'm going there anyway, we can find your son later and…"

The shell-shocked demeanor was completely gone from Carth's face as he pulled away furiously. "No!" he exclaimed. "Dustil's my son; I thought he was dead! If he's here, I have to go find him! I have to!" Sharply, he stormed away. Ashi leapt up and followed him, catching up and pulling him aside as he shoved through the entrance.

"And what the hell are you planning, flyboy?" she snapped. "Gonna go barging into the academy full of Sith and rescue your son, all the while somehow convincing everyone else not to kill you? Because I don't exactly think your kid's there because he likes the uniforms. So, yeah; that'll work real well. Especially when he decides to kill you for prestige."

Carth's hand jerked up, and for a moment, Ashi flinched back, anticipating pain that never came. The next moment, they both froze, staring. Ashi was half surprised she didn't have a new bruise forming on her cheek—she had sort of asked for that one—but Carth looked shocked and guilty.

"What do you suggest?" he asked slowly.

Ashi grinned hesitantly. "Infiltration. Like, the subtle kind."

He paused for a long moment, and then murmured, "Fine." It sounded like the very word caused him physical pain, but Ashi nodded gratefully.

"Good," she said, and her face softened slightly. "Carth, we will find him. I swear. We'll get him out."

As he looked at her, a revelation occurred to him. He couldn't doubt her. Ashi was more than capable of anything she'd try, and if anyone could save Dustil, it was probably her.

In short, he trusted her.

He nodded, more surely. "All right," he said. "Thank you."

"No problem," she replied, and then glanced around, frowning. "Now, help me find a purple Twi'lek."

* * *

Yuthura Ban was lurking surreptitiously in a corner when Ashi approached, and scowled venomously. "Make it quick, Jedi. I have little patience for people who would waste my time."

"I'm no Jedi," Ashi replied reflexively, and Yuthura gave her a wry smile.

"Ah. A fallen Jedi, perhaps, but a Jedi nonetheless. And hardly the first to come to Korriban, after all, willing to abandon that pathetic order of yours. Is it your desire, then, to become a Sith? Do you wish to train at the academy?"

Ashi shrugged. "Maybe. I haven't really thought about it."

"Maybe you should," Yuthura replied. "You see, the Sith wield ultimate power, my dear. To be a Sith… it is to taste freedom, and to know victory. Nothing—_nothing—_is as glorious as bending the Force to your will."

"I see," she nodded. "So, about joining you…"

Yuthura chuckled. "Heard enough, have you? Very well, then, what is it to be? Do you wish to train at our academy?

"Yes. I want to be a Sith."

Ashi ignored Carth and Bastila exchanging worried glances at this. It wasn't her fault she was a good actress.

"Ah," Yuthura sighed. "So you are just another hopeful after all. Or… are you? There is something odd about you that I cannot place…" She examined Ashi closely. "Obviously you were a Jedi, strong in the Force. For how long did they train you?"

"Does it matter?" Ashi asked, somehow suspecting 'two and a half months' was not a very good answer.

"It makes little difference. But the amount of raw powers… the potential… well. With power like that, you could become a great Sith. Does that interest you?"

She smiled, trying to project certainty. "Yes. I want to become a Sith."

"Excellent," Yuthura said. "Return here tomorrow morning, and I shall take you to the academy. There, we shall see if you are ready to join the ranks of the other students. And… one more thing." She glanced over at Ashi's friends, who were now trying hard to pretend they weren't eavesdropping. "These… companions of yours will not be coming with you, I presume?"

"He is." Ashi gestured to Carth, who obligingly got up and came over. "But he's a slave. Don't worry about him."

The Sith woman surveyed Carth slowly. "Bit old for a pleasure slave, isn't he?" she observed. Behind them, Jolee choked into his drink, and Carth's mouth dropped open at the double indignity. Only Ashi maintained her cool, although her cheeks flushed slightly.

"His uses are my own," she replied icily, and Yuthura shrugged.

"Fair enough, as long as he does not… disturb your training." Ashi firmly ignored the implication of her words, and shook her head. "Very well. Are you ready to go to the academy?" Here she nodded, and the woman smiled. "Excellent. Return here tomorrow; I will take you to the academy, and we will see if you are ready to become a Sith."

Ashi nodded again—it seemed like the right thing to do—and, looking satisfied, Yuthura turned and stalked away.

Jolee was still snickering. Ashi rolled her eyes at him. "Grow up, old man," she muttered, before heading out of the cantina as well.

* * *

The next day, true to her words, Ashi found Yuthura in the cantina, and the Sith woman led her to the academy. The apparent master was waiting for them, and surveyed the pair coldly as they entered. He had continued to regard Ashi as one might a dead fish, until she was the only one who, somehow, could recite the Sith Code, shocking everyone—including herself. But prestige was prestige, and Ashi wasn't complaining, even if it bothered her to know their code, without knowing why.

The next morning, she awoke in a small chamber, with sandstone walls and only vague light that filtered in from a distant skylight. It wasn't comfortable to any great degree, but she did have it better than Carth, who had to sleep on the floor. He was leaning against the wall, snoring gently, when she woke him up and pointed him out of the room so she could get dressed.

To her annoyance, the only clothes there were the mandatory black leggings, knee-high boots, and dark thigh-length robes. Ashi dressed reluctantly in them and stepped out, glaring down at herself.

"This sucks," she muttered, stepping out of the room. Carth smirked.

"Convincing. A few tattoos and you'd fit right in."

She glanced up at him, her eyes flashing. Her expression was only half playful. "Sorry? Would you like to repeat that, Carth?"

He cleared his throat. "I, ah… I said black is a good color on you."

"That's what I thought," she replied smugly, just as they turned a corner and nearly ran into a purple figure.

"Ah," said Yuthura with a smirk. "If it isn't my favorite prospect."

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "Your favorite?"

"Absolutely. By my estimations, you are far more likely to achieve the necessary prestige than any of the other competitors. In fact, I am so certain of that that I am willing to offer you an opportunity of the once-in-a-lifetime variety." She paused. "Would you like to hear it?"

"Yeah, sure," Ashi replied instantly.

"Good." Yuthura smiled. "I do so adore someone who's willing to take a chance. As I said, you are no doubt the one who Uthar will choose to become a Sith. With my help, of course," she interjected slyly. "Once that occurs, he will take you into the tomb of Naga Sadow for your final test. There, you, he, and I will be alone. The perfect time to… shall we say, arrange for a change in the academy's leadership?"

"What's the deal with the tomb?"

"It is an ancient Sith ruin on the surface that was visited years ago by Darth Revan and Darth Malak," Yuthura explained. "It contains a Star Map of great importance."

She kept talking, but Ashi was distracted, taking in what she had said. The map was in the tomb, so… being a Sith wasn't going to be good enough: she would have to be the select student.

So maybe she should _listen_.

"…anyway, the Map is not what is important. That Uthar will be alone is what is important," Yuthura was saying. Her voice was full of relish as she implied her plot, and Ashi understood. She crossed her arms skeptically.

"And why shouldn't I go tell Uthar about your little plot for prestige?"

The woman shrugged. "You could try, I suppose. Only a hint of betrayal, and he would move to eliminate me. He is a clever man—he trusts no one."

_Possibly with good reason_, Ashi thought dryly.

"But think of this: if you are to side with me, you can rise with me to a new place at my side, as we rule the academy. Uthar will not offer you that."

Ashi paused, and then nodded. Couldn't hurt to have Yuthura on her side. "Yeah, I'll do it," she agreed, and Yuthura smiled.

"Very good. I'm so glad you see it my way," she said. "I will begin to make the preparations for your final test. Your only job now is to get there… don't disappoint me." She paused, and then added, "If you are looking for prestige, I would see Lashowe. She already seems to have a plan." Giving Ashi a final piercing gaze, she turned and walked away.

Ashi was now interested in exploring the Valley, where there were supposed to be many different prestige opportunities, but the school, built like a sandstone labyrinth, was confusing, and she found herself wandering, before she rounded a corner and almost ran into a teenaged boy.

"Hey." He grinned calmly, brushing back his hair from his face. "Take a wrong turn somewhere?"

Carth's face had gone pale with disbelief. "Dustil?" he croaked. "Is that you?"

Ashi knew it was, though, even before Dustil's reaction. The resemblance to Carth was unmistakable, right down the messy hair and the sharp brown eyes.

The grin slid from the boy's face in an instant, and his eyes narrowed. He was shocked, but he hid it well. "Oh. Great. It's Dad," he drawled. "Figures you'd come to rescue me after all this time. How did you even manage to get into the academy?"

"Through the front doors," Ashi replied, and he snorted.

"Cute. Maybe Master Uthar would be interested to know exactly who he's got in his academy," he snapped. "How come you're here, Dad? Because it better not be for me. Couldn't you just have gotten yourself blown up fighting and spared me the reunion?"

Carth's mouth dropped open as if he had been punched. "What… what are you talking about? I thought you were dead!"

Ashi felt a sinking in her stomach. Sure enough, Dustil wasn't here because he liked the uniform—and he didn't seem to like Republic people any more than Ashi. As she thought that, he rolled his eyes pityingly.

"Yeah, well, too bad you didn't still think that. Did you honestly think I'd be happy to see you? Look, everyone!" he exclaimed suddenly, his tone mock-enthusiastic. "It's Dad, come to rescue me at long last! Sure, he left me and Mom to die on Telos, but that doesn't matter!" he chirped brightly.

Carth's face fell further. "No, I didn't abandon you!" he cried, his words spilling over each other. "Telos was in ruins, and the task force arrived too late, and your mother… I held her while…"

He broke off suddenly, shaking his head. "Dustil, please. I looked everywhere for you, I…"

Dustil was unmoved. "Save it," he spat. "You abandoned us way before that. You left us during the wars, and even when you came back you didn't stay!" His voice had stopped being simply angry now; Ashi could detect a quiet but definite undertone of hurt.

"I didn't have a choice," Carth insisted, but his voice was less sure now as his excuses crumbled. "I was needed—"

"Yeah?" Dustil scowled. "Well, you were needed at home, too!" His voice became sharp and accusing. "You were needed when they started bombing, and I got captured. I…"

He stopped himself, taking a deep breath. "No. You know what, it doesn't matter. I have a new family now—one that _cares_ about me!"

"The Sith?" Carth demanded, horror shading his words. "Dustil, you can't mean that! The Sith killed your mother, the Sith destroyed Telos!"

"So? You're the soldier, Dad. How many mothers have you killed?"

Carth was staring at him as if his eyes couldn't process this. "No. You've been brainwashed. The son I knew would never…"

"NO!" Dustil burst out, his voice rising to a shout. "You _never_ knew me! You weren't even _there_ to know me! So _don't_ think you can tell me what I _would _or _wouldn't_ _fracking do_!"

Carth shook his head again firmly. "No. I don't know what's been done to you, Dustil, but you're coming out of here with me, now."

Dustil's eyes narrowed, and his voice, full of unbridled rage, became soft and dangerous. "Touch me, and you're dead, old man," he hissed. "Get out! Get out, or I'll go tell Uthar you're here!"

Carth recoiled as if slapped. He opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't seem to find anything to say. Ashi, sensing the precarious situation, jumped into the argument.

"Well. Looks like your little boy's all grown up," she muttered to Carth, before looking over at Dustil, who was glaring venomously at them both. "Calm down, Dustil," she said slowly. "Carth only wants to protect you. He's stupid, but that's what he does. He cares about you," she added hopefully.

"I don't need his protection anymore," Dustil replied adamantly. "The Sith give me everything I need."

"You can't mean that!" Carth exploded. "The Sith are the dark side! They took me away from you and your mother! They're what took you from me," he said, and his voice was pained as he finally seemed to grasp the distance between him and his son.

"No, it's not! The Sith are superior! And you were at war long before they came along!"

"The Sith went to war for conquest, to rule the helpless! I went to war for you, Dustil, for your freedom, your future!" The boy snorted, unimpressed, but Carth continued. "If I failed you, then it's my failure. Please don't add to it by becoming part of something evil."

Ashi could see Dustil's gaze soften for an instant as he gazed at his father. _Yeah, come on,_ she urged mentally, and he took a deep breath before replying, "Prove it." He nodded to himself, seeming satisfied with this answer. "Yeah. Prove they're so evil, and I'll… I'll think about it."

Ashi shrugged. "Fine. Come with us; this shouldn't take long."

He stared, a '_how stupid do you think I am?_' look. "No, I'm staying right here. I won't tell anyone that you're here… yet. But if I hear you asking questions about me, or anything like that, I swear I'll tell everyone what you're up to. Got that, Dad? Prove what you're saying is true. I'm not going anywhere otherwise," he snapped, and Carth slowly nodded.

"I got it, Dustil," he said wearily. "I'll find proof. I promise."

Dustil nodded. It seemed to have sunk in that this was actually his father, and he looked uncertain what to say, now that he wasn't exactly angry. "Yeah. Yeah, you do that," he replied finally, and brushed past. Ashi gave him a long, curious look as he stalked down the corridor.

"So, maybe not the reunion you were hoping for?"

Carth ignored her, and inwardly appreciated that she hadn't yet said 'I told you so'. "We have to find something. We have to prove to him that the Sith are evil. There has to be something here that'll show him that."

"We will, Carth," she said tiredly. "I promise."

He shrugged. "Sooner rather then later," he replied, and then fell silent. Ashi sensed he wasn't going to say anything else, and decided, against impulse, not to speak. The only thing she could do now was help Dustil… and soon.

* * *

They spent the rest of the day exploring the academy. Ashi, to Carth's obvious disappointment, couldn't find anything that would pass as proof for Dustil, but she did get to see the rest of the academy. It consisted of mostly training rooms and the students' quarters, but she also found the interrogation room and a dueling room, where she was offered but denied the chance to fight one of the prisoners. The interrogation room was slightly more interesting, and Ashi managed to piss off the guard in there when she saved the Mandalorian, putting him in a coma.

She was also mulling over what Yuthura had said. Lashowe probably could be a good person to have on her side. Without a doubt, she would at least have a plan. Carth was surprised when Ashi began to head to the dormitories, and when they stopped outside Lashowe's room, he didn't bother to hide his distaste.

"Uh, no offense," he muttered, "but I think you could do better with allies."

Ashi grinned, the sort of unusual grin that indicated she had a plan. "So could she, if this works," she replied, before turning the corner into the little room.

Lashowe jerked in surprise, moving to cover the computer screen in front of her, before glaring at Ashi. "Oh, it's you," she sneered. "I remember you from the colony. I'm still surprised you got in."

Ashi smiled back. "Aren't you sweet," she replied, before trying to peer innocently over Lashowe's shoulder. "What're you doing?"

Lashowe's eyes narrowed, but she couldn't seem to help bragging. "Oh, I've just found a surefire way to pull ahead in this little contest."

"Yeah?" Ashi raised her eyebrows in interest. "What's that?"

She had gone too far, and Lashowe backtracked. "Curiosity killed the cat," she snapped pointedly.

Ashi shrugged. "Well, my curiosity's more the kind that gets other cats killed."

The Sith girl frowned at that, and then scrutinized Ashi closely. She seemed impressed by the line. "An artifact," she said suddenly, and quickly added, "Far more impressive than whatever you think you can scrounge up."

"But you don't have it yet, do you?"

Lashowe scowled defensively. "I'm getting it!"

Ashi paused for a moment, and then asked, "It's guarded, isn't it?"

The girl's mouth dropped open for a moment, before she glared daggers again. "So what?" she replied contemptuously. "I'll get it anyway. Nothing good comes without a fight—that's the Sith motto, more or less."

"But maybe I could help you get it?"

Lashowe frowned again, but then smirked unexpectedly. "Hmm… _well_, I suppose I could use some help. After all, the artifact I'm know of certainly won't be easy to take. But why," she mused slowly, "should I work with you?"

Ashi grinned. "You know that we're the only ones with real chances. Together, we'd be unbeatable," she explained, deciding to prey on the girl's ego.

"Hmm. That is true, I suppose. And it is possible Master Uthar could award both of us prestige for this. We'd be ahead of the others for sure." She paused, and then motioned Ashi closer. "The holocron is in the gullet of a tuk'ata mother. I can arrange for us to meet her, but I might need your help in putting her down. Got it?" she asked sharply, and Ashi nodded, although she didn't miss the flicker of vindictiveness that flashed in the girl's eyes. Lashowe was planning more than that.

"Good. We can meet in the Valley of the Dark Lords tomorrow, how about?" the Sith girl suggested, oblivious to Ashi catching her lie.

"Sure. No problem."

Lashowe smiled. "Excellent. We can meet in the northeast part of the valley at nine, tomorrow morning. I'll see you then," she said, before Ashi could cut in.

Grudgingly, Ashi nodded, and turned and headed out the door. Her face slipped to a scowl as she trudged towards the dormitory.

"Something wrong?" Carth asked with a smirk.

"With you," Ashi retorted immediately, and then sighed. "No one else seems to have fracking heard of sleeping in. I was planning to be asleep at nine."

"Poor you," he replied dryly, as they entered her room. Ashi glared, evidently deciding he didn't sound sincere enough.

"I think so," she grumbled, kicking off her boots and rolling into bed.

* * *

The next day dawned bright and early, which annoyed Ashi even more as she worked her way to the Valley of the Dark Lords. The entire valley was massive, framed by huge sandstone tombs, with a parade of obelisks rising from the center, throwing shadows in the morning light. The sun shone from between the two ridges at the end, arguably the only color in a world of browns and blacks. Gray was the color of the sky on Korriban, apparently, which Ashi found suitably depressing.

But it was a huge place nonetheless, and it was at least nine-fifteen when she met Lashowe at the northeastern section. The girl was kneeling, chanting in a strange language seemingly to herself, but looked up when Ashi snickered.

"You're late," she snapped.

"Couldn't find it."

Lashowe got to her feet, scowling. "If you were any later, we'd have to abandon this. I've been calling to the tuk'ata queen in their language…"

"Yeah, I noticed," Ashi interjected with a grin, earning an glare.

"_But_," Lashowe continued pointedly, "she should be arriving anytime…" She stopped, and her head snapped to the side, as they both heard the clatter of hooves. "And here she is now." The Sith girl grinned, drawing her red lightsaber. Ashi followed suit, and they braced themselves for the onslaught of tuk'ata.

The gray, goat-like beasts fought viciously, and were unhelpfully Force-resistant, but Ashi and Lashowe still killed the small pack quickly. Lashowe walked up to the largest and slit its throat, before sticking her hands purposefully into the gore, to Ashi's disgust. She pulled out a holocron with a look of delight, ignoring the oily blood coating everything to her elbows.

"Wonderful!" she exclaimed. "The beast is dead. We work better together than I could have ever anticipated. And," she added, admiring the bloody object in her hand, "the holocron is ours, of course." The next moment, her eyes flashed with amusement. "I'll just run along and give this to Master Uthar. Naturally, I'll be sure to tell him of your contribution."

_Ah. That's how she's going to play it_, Ashi realized. She could have been a lot subtler with that one. Still, Sith never really went for 'subtle', did they?

"How about we just go together?" she suggested, grinning and anticipating some more blood pretty soon.

"Forget it; I'm not waiting up for you. That wasn't our plan, anyway."

"The plan's changed," Ashi replied. Lashowe narrowed her eyes, and Ashi met the glare with a smirk. "And the new plan's that I get my share of the credit."

Lashowe, obviously anticipating this, pulled out her lightsaber. "Over my dead body," she snarled.

Ashi shrugged, unperturbed. "Okay," she agreed, pulling out her own blade.

Unfortunately, Lashowe wasn't one of the academy's best students for nothing. She was a lethal fighter, and probably would have made an excellent Sith. Probably being the operative word, of course, as it was Ashi who headed back to the school with the Jedi holocron in hand.

Talking to Uthar went better than expected. Ashi's various deeds earned her some prestige, but the master was also interested in Yuthura's schemes that Ashi described to him. Yuthura was right; he wanted her eliminated now, and somehow he seemed to think Ashi should do it. She accepted the poison he gave her, and quickly passed it on to a servant who would give it to Yuthura. Needless to say, Uthar was pleased. He dismissed Ashi, who immediately went to find Yuthura.

The Twi'lek woman was near the training rooms when Ashi, flanked by a gloomy Carth, caught up with her. "Yes?" she snapped, but then relaxed. "Oh—it's you. I understand you have impressed Uthar, at least a little. That is good. One step closer to completing our plan."

"Uh, yeah. About the plan…"

Yuthura's eyes widened. "What? The plan is still intact, isn't it?"

"He plans to have me fight you in the final test, instead of another student," Ashi explained quickly. "He already noticed you were plotting something."

"Ah." Yuthura nodded appreciatively. "How very clever of him. But… why would he decide that?" Her eyes narrowed suddenly, and she hissed, "You didn't say anything to him, did you?"

_Was it worth lying? Might as well_, Ashi figured. "No."

Yuthura fixed her with an icy stare, and then a disturbing sensation rushed over Ashi, as if her head was full of ice. Dizziness overwhelmed her, and her vision blurred slightly; for a moment her stomach wrenched and she thought she was going to throw up; but then in another instant it was over, and Yuthura was laughing.

"Don't try to lie to a Sith, my dear," she said, and Ashi felt sick. The woman had been into her head, she realized with a jolt. And had she seen more than just Ashi's conversation with Uthar, then? What about the quest, the fact she wasn't really a student?

But Yuthura simply shook her head. "You are attempting to play both sides of the fence. I respect that, but it is a dangerous game you are playing."

Ashi rolled her eyes inwardly. _Dangerous? You don't know the half of it._

"If you think Uthar will truly be so grateful to you for double-crossing me, then think again. You only chance lies with me." Ashi nodded, and Yuthura smiled. "Good. You understand. And is there anything else I should know?"

"No." At Yuthura's skeptical look, she added, "He doesn't trust anyone, right?" and the woman seemed satisfied.

"I see. Very well." She reached into her pocket, and pulled out a card and a small dark box, with spidery legs. "This pass card will allow you entrance to Uthar's quarters. Take this device, too, and plant it under his cot. It will render him too weak to stand against us." Then she leaned in closer, and her eyes were sharp and dangerous as she hissed, "Don't even think of failing me. You and I are too far into this to back out."

She forced the box and the card into Ashi's hands, and then spun and paced down the corridor, acting as if nothing had happened at all. Ashi stared at the passcard, and a smile spread across her lips. "You know what this means, right, flyboy?" she asked, staring at it.

"What?" Carth asked nervously.

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Come on, think a little. Out of all the places in the entire damn academy, where's the best to find incriminating proof against the Sith?"

Realization dawned on Carth's face, and he began to smile.

"Dustil's proof?" he asked, and she smiled.

"Coming right up."

* * *

**the next chapter will, in fact, contain father-son bonding. you have been warned. however, it also contains giant monsters, caves, bait, and ghosts. and, i have an important question. **

**in case you haven't noticed, my chapters are _long_. so long, in fact, that it's getting a little ridiculous. i'm considering making it a 3-part story: prologue thru dantooine, kashyyyk thru leviathan, and then revan reveal thru the end. opinions? plz let me know. thx,  
**

**--skrybble  
**


	14. Truth

**hi everyone!  
I am so tired of school that it's not even funny, but somehow I'm scraping out a little time for writing in between. oh well. huge thanks to everyone who reviewed, especially Angel of Melius Prime. apparently a long story works for everyone: good to know, thanks. I'm new at this ;)**

**A warning: implied fluff is coming. In case anyone doesn't know, I'm a Revan/Carth shipper, so I'm kicking that off for real here...

* * *

**

**Truth: honesty, reality—what is real  
Lies: deliberate falsehoods—what we believe

* * *

**

"Dustil?"

Ashi peered through the doorway nervously, to be met by a vicious glare at her invasion of his privacy. It was almost creepy how alike to Carth, and yet how different, Dustil was. He was at a tool bench, but at her arrival, he turned instinctively to hide it.

"Oh. You're back," he said unenthusiastically. "So tell me, _Dad_, where's the proof you promised?"

"Just something I wanted you to look at," Carth replied calmly. If Ashi hadn't been paying the utmost attention, she certainly wouldn't have noticed the sadness in his eyes.

"You know someone called Selene, Dustil?" she cut in, holding up the datapad.

Dustil's mouth dropped open in utter shock. Whatever he had expected, it hadn't been that. "Selene?" he repeated, "She… she was the one who convinced me to join the academy in the first place." His eyes narrowed as he demanded, "How do _you_ know about her?"

Ashi ignored the question. "Might want to take a look at this, then," she suggested, and tossed the small object to Dustil. He caught it and frowned.

"This belongs to Master Uthar. How did you get it?"

"Found it," she shrugged.

Dustil's eyes continued to flick from side to side as he read. Slowly, his face went pale with horror. "No… no, this can't be right," he murmured, stumbling over to his bed and sitting down heavily. "They told me she got lost on a mission… in the Valley…" He shook his head harder, eyes wide and appalled. "This says that they…"

"Killed her," Carth finished harshly. "Killed her because she was hindering your progress. Superiority at any cost, Dustil. There's your evil. Or can you live with that?"

To Ashi, Dustil had never looked more like Carth. His face bore a shock, and a sadness, that Ashi had seen on the soldier all too many times, and yet his eyes had grown steely, resolved.

"No. I can't," Dustil said quietly. "I had no idea—they _lied_ to me!"

Carth nodded. "There's the son I remember. Now, will you _leave_ here?"

Dustil hesitated, and then shook his head. Ashi's first reaction was disbelief, but he quickly added, "No. You can do whatever you have to, but I have other friends here… I have to warn them what's going on. And maybe I can, you know, try to find out some more information, right? Something to help you."

Carth smiled. "I don't suppose I can try to talk you out of that, can I? I mean, you aren't going to do anything halfway?" When Dustil shook his head again, he grinned. "Sounds familiar."

"Yeah," Dustil agreed tentatively. "Yeah, I guess it does."

Carth's grin widened. If it got any bigger, Ashi suspected he would break his jaw.

"I'm proud of you, Dustil," he said. "You're not hanging on to your lie after you see it for what it is. Not everyone can do that."

Dustil, for the first time Ashi had ever seen, looked genuinely happy. "Thanks, Dad," he replied, and for the first time, the word 'Dad' held no contempt at all. "I'm… I'm still not sure about… us, but maybe we can get back to where we should have been."

"Yeah. I'd like that."

_Wow, that's sweet_, thought Ashi dryly._ They should hug or something_. With some difficulty, she managed not to ruin the moment. "What about after that, though?" she asked finally. "What then?"

Dustil looked unsure. "I don't know. Why?"

"Because," she replied calmly, "we've got a ship and a crew already. I bet we could take one more."

"But won't they mind that I was, you know… a Sith?"

Ashi snorted. "We have two Jedi, a Wookiee, a hyperactive Twi'lek, a senile old man, a Mandalorian, and your dad. I think they can deal with you."

"I'll fit right in," Dustil muttered wryly.

"Cool. Great." She nodded, grinning, and then hesitated. They didn't really want her here—not that they would have kicked her out, but still. "Eh, I'm going to go to bed," she said, turning and waving offhandedly. "You two can… connect or something."

She left the room, heading back to her dormitory. Stupid as it was, she couldn't fight a grin off her face. Carth and Dustil both looked damn near ecstatic—in fact, she wasn't sure she had ever seen Carth looked that happy. She couldn't help feeling glad for him, too. The pain in his mind was still etched into her memory, but this might help a little. He'd been able to save his son.

She strolled back to her room and got into her bed with a deep, warm satisfaction that was lessened slightly by exhaustion. A headache was beginning to pound at her temples—whether it was thanks to the atmosphere or tiredness she couldn't say—and it was with relief that she slumped into bed. But as always when she wished for sleep, it came with torturous slowness. After what felt like years of restlessness, she heard Carth come in, and opened her eyes a crack, curious despite herself.

He was smiling. He took off his jacket and folded it against the wall, before his dark eyes turned to her. To her surprise, they lingered on her curled figure, and she made her breathing forcibly even, still feigning sleep. He seemed to buy it.

Gently, he took a step toward her, and then reached out brushed his fingertips along her face, sweeping her hair out of her eyes. She took another deep breath, resisting the intense urge to ask him what he was doing. He paused, eyes resting gently on her face, and then stepped away.

It seemed he was done; he sat back against the wall and shut his eyes. Soon his breathing deepened and he began to snore gently. Ashi smiled, and slowly matched her breath to his, closing her eyes.

A few minutes later, both of them were asleep.

* * *

Ashi and Carth decided to go to the valley again the next day. Ashi's hopes were high, as Dustil had told her it was a good place to earn prestige, but unfortunately, she found herself disappointed. It turned out the valley wasn't a good place to be that day, something she found out the hard way when they arrived at the surface. It was the middle of one of the planet's famous dust storms: winds whipped the earth, lifting blinding clouds that completely blocked their vision past the immediate three feet. There was no way they would make the five-or-ten-minute trek to the valley.

Ashi tried to stagger forward for a minute or so, but the dust was overpowering, and they eventually ducked into the shelter of a small cave. There was a brief moment of silence, where Ashi tried in vain to brush the dust and grit off her robes, before she glanced around and wondered aloud, "Where are we?"

"A cave, I guess," offered Carth.

"Perceptive." Ashi rolled her eyes. "I'm forgetting why I brought you."

"And do_ you_ know where we are?"

"I think it's called the Shyrack Caves. I heard one of the other students talking about them."

"What did they say?"

She paused to consider. "Uh… right. Renegade students. I think you'll like this one. Bunch of kids who dumped the Sith and made a break for it."

"They're still here?" Carth asked, as she got to her feet and found her lightsaber. Violet light filled the cave, throwing eerie shadows.

"Presumably it wasn't a very good break for it." Ashi motioned for him to get up. "We're going to hope that they are."

They began, slowly, to explore the caves. It grew dark and damp, and periodically swarms of bat-like shyrack attacked them, but she and Carth kept going. Finally, after almost an hour, something new caught Ashi's eyes. She frowned, deactivating her lightsaber. Sure enough, there was an orangey glow in the distance, flickering but definitely there.

She held a finger to her lips, and then turned on her stealth belt. Hardly more than a shimmer in the air, she crept forward and peered around a stalagmite. There were a few students in tattered gray uniforms. They were disheveled and looked tired, but strong.

Ashi moved a little closer, keeping her footsteps light and quiet as she tiptoed along the edge of a dark, deep-looking pool of water. Find the students… check.

Then, one of them looked up sharply, and her eyes widened as she stared at the space where Ashi was. With a jolt, Ashi realized that the girl could sense her.

The next second, the girl had sprung across the cavern and tackled her. Ashi stumbled and then staggered backwards, and with a splash, the two of them tumbled into the pool. With a slight zap of electricity, Ashi felt her stealth belt flicker and die. She had time to think that they could all see her now, before the girl waved a hand, and she was forced underwater.

She couldn't breathe. It was cold and dark, and she could find no solid ground. Terror overwhelmed her. She couldn't swim, she'd never learned, she…

* * *

"_Come on, Al!"_

_She was a little girl, nine or ten, and a wide smile was plastered on her face. It was a gloriously sunny day on the calm, beige planet; around her, long grasses rolled in waves under the wind, and a few feet below her, a blue river danced by, sparking. She had her arms out to the sides for balance, and was calmly placing one foot before the other with feline grace._

"_That's not a good idea," Alek replied, and she turned her head to see him on the bank. "Red, I think you should come back; that log's not safe."_

_The log she was walking on? Ridiculous. She was halfway across already. "Don't be a chicken," she replied disdainfully. "Come on, Al; you too scared or something?"_

"_Red!" he snapped. "Get back here, the log's going to…"_

_He was cut off by her scream. The wood, rotten and old, snapped suddenly under her feet, throwing her off balance. For a moment she slipped and hung, suspended, in the air, and then she was underwater._

_Freezing water filled her mouth, her lungs. The river was deeper than it looked, and moved faster than she'd suspected; the current tugged her down and she felt herself rushing away. Pure terror was pulsing through her veins, and her lungs burned for need of air as she was tossed through the water like a rag doll…_

_Quite suddenly, she felt something clench around her wrist, tugging. Before she had time to worry, her head broke the surface. An arm was wrapped around her shoulders, dragging her determinedly towards the bank. Knowing any help she might offer probably wouldn't be helpful, she went limp, allowing her to fight his way to land._

_The second her feet touched bottom she was stumbling, gasping and coughing, onto the bank, collapsing to her knees on the ground. Alek's arm was still around her shoulders, and he was as pale as she must have been. _

"_Force, Red," he said finally, angrily, "you've got to learn to swim…"

* * *

_

The vision flashed before her eyes in an instant, Red's terror one and the same with Ashi's fear now. Only there was no one to save her…

She choked at the thought and kicked out desperately; to her surprise, her foot connected with something. The pressure keeping her under disappeared. Grabbing at the rocky edge of the pool, Ashi pulled herself out of the water and allowed herself a nervous look around. The dark-skinned girl who had attacked her was in the water, clutching her stomach and glaring, and all the other students were staring at her in disbelief.

She waved hopefully.

The girl who had attacked her was not amused. "Is there anyone else with you?" she demanded, heaving herself out of the pool, and Ashi nodded resignedly.

"Carth!" she called, and he rounded the corner, raising his eyebrows.

"Nice. You've made some new friends," he observed, taking in the angry-looking crowd surrounding her. The girl, who appeared to be in charge, scowled fiercely at Ashi.

"All right. Who the hell are you," she snapped, "and what exactly do you think you're doing here, sithspawn?"

Ashi crossed her arms indignantly. "I'm not a Sith."

"Yet you're wearing a Sith uniform."

"Not because I like it. And so are you."

The girl opened her mouth to object and then closed it slowly. "Well… who are you, then?"

"Ashi Lucas. I'm freelance. This is Carth. He's a Republic pilot, so he's not going to kill you either." She smiled knowingly. "And you're the renegade students, right?"

The girl nodded. "Ah, so you've heard of us. I'm Thalia May, and these are my friends." There was a pause, and then she finally asked, "What are you doing here? If you're not here to kill us."

"Why would I kill you?" Ashi replied. "Except, you know, that you tried to kill me first." At that, Thalia May shrugged apologetically.

"They've been sending plenty of students out here to try to kill us and get some prestige. We can get around most of them and kill the ones we can't, but that doesn't mean we don't want to be careful. I think that _Master_ Uthar's pretty eager to get rid of us. Wants to make an example of us and all."

Ashi nodded. "So, uh, why haven't you left? I mean, if he's got it in for you and all."

Thalia May looked suddenly dejected. "Well. It's not like we haven't _tried_. But there's only one other exit, and it's blocked. Guarded, I suppose."

Ashi felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. She had a sneaking suspicion where this was going. "By what?"

"We don't know, exactly. None of us had ever seen anything like it. It was this massive dark beast, covered in spines… oh, and it didn't respond to any kind of Force attacks. Except dark ones, anyway, but we've agreed not to use those."

Ashi's heart sank. "This creature wouldn't happen to have, oh, I don't know, big long teeth and claws?"

Thalia May looked surprised. "You know it, then?"

_Oh, I know it._ Ashi bit down a groan. That was a terentek guarding the exit—a fracking terentek! No wonder the students hadn't been able to escape. Ashi had had a Mandalorian warrior, a Jedi Guardian, and an old man who fought like hell last time she faced one, and they had hardly escaped with their lives.

But she looked across at the eager faces of the renegade students, and felt a wave of pity for them. Obviously, they were smart enough to see how messed up the Sith really were, and they were good enough to want to get out. And if she didn't at least try to help them, then they would probably die.

"Yeah," she said. "Yeah, I've fought one of those before."

New respect bloomed on the students' faces, especially Thalia May. "And you defeated it?"

Ashi nodded—because she had, hadn't she?—and Thalia May looked sheepish. "So… do you think you could kill this one for us?"

Honestly, Ashi was fairly certain the answer was _no_. Fighting it head-on, her chances were less than slim to none. But as she looked around again, at all the teenagers and their goddamn hopeful expressions, she couldn't muster a refusal.

"I… could do that."

Thalia May beamed. "Thank you. You're saving us."

Ashi shrugged. "Yeah. Well. Don't tell the Sith, all right?" She paused. "So where is it?"

"Far west. All the passages lead there eventually. It won't be _finding_ it that's the problem."

_Aren't we reassuring. _"Great. Well, I'll just come back after I've killed it." _If I kill it,_ Ashi couldn't help thinking. "Wish me luck, or something," she added, turning and heading for the western tunnel.

The girl had been right, though—the blocked exit was easy to find. After about a half hour, she and Carth emerged into a huge, open space, and for a moment she was froze with vertigo. A massive chasm split the entire cavern in two, with only a small, jutting sliver of rock connecting the two. On the bridge lurked a massive monster that sent an icy shiver running down her spine.

"That's it."

"Really?" Carth replied dryly, and she elbowed him sharply, before turning back to the terentek. It didn't seem to have noticed her, and she would have liked to keep it that way. Unfortunately, she couldn't, so she turned her mind to the unwelcoming problem of how to kill it. Her first instinct was to blow up the bridge it was on, and never have it see her, but with a sigh she remembered the students still needed a way to get across.

"How should we kill it?" she asked, turning to Carth.

"How did you kill it before?" he demanded.

"Hmm, let me think. Oh, right—made everyone else be bait, jumped on its back, and stuffed a frag grenade down its throat."

He shook his head slowly. "You never do things the easy way, do you?"

"It worked."

"And it sounds like a one in a million. What can we going to do instead?"

She paused. "Well, you can't hurt them from the outside. But if we can make it fall into the pit, then there's nothing it can do." An idea was beginning to form, and a small grin appeared on her face. "If we can lure it into a trap, then we can blow it off the cliff. Problem solved."

"And who's the bait?"

"I don't know, but since you're wearing that jacket, I doubt it thinks you look anywhere near appetizing," she teased. "So probably me. Can you set off a detonator?"

He blinked. "What?"

"It's not _hard_," she sighed. "Press a button to blow up some mines?"

"Oh. Right. Yeah."

He didn't sound very convincing, but she shrugged anyway, and tossed him her bag. Instinctively, he recoiled, aware of the amount of explosives it held, and Ashi rolled her eyes. "Pass me some mines?"

About fifteen minutes later, they were done. Ashi stepped back, surveying her handiwork with pride. Their trap was near invisible, but lethal: when the terentek got to it, she would duck down the tunnel, Carth would set off the mines, and the monster would be blown into the gorge. Beautiful.

Now all that was left was being bait. Ashi reluctantly nodded to Carth, who took shelter in one of the tunnels. Then, swallowing her apprehension, she picked up a couple dusty rocks from the ground. She jogged closer, making no effort to be quiet, and then stopped at the foot of the bridge, levitating the rocks above her open hand. With only a moment's hesitation, she sent them flying at the terentek.

"Hey!" she shouted, her voice echoing and horribly loud. "Look! Dinner!"

It snorted as the rocks bounced off its hide, like gnats attacking a bantha, but then caught sight of her. With terrifying speed, it charged, and Ashi took off. It was faster than she had expected, much faster than her, and her heart hammered against her ribs as she sprinted full out. The minefield was only a moment away, and she waved insistently at the tunnel where she hoped Carth was.

Nothing happened.

She had nowhere to run. The walls loomed around her; she was stuck in the middle of her own trap as the terentek approached. "Any time now!"

The terentek took a step closer. She could have sworn it was grinning. Or maybe its teeth didn't just fit in its mouth. But it was a bad idea to think about teeth, because it was all too easy to imagine them ripping through her in about a second and a half…

And then, Carth must have suddenly figured out how the detonator worked, because all the mines exploded at once. The earth beneath the terentek changed to dust in an instant, but Ashi didn't have time to watch with vindictive satisfaction; she was lunging for her tunnel with desperation, and realizing she had overestimated the number of mines. The rock was old and crumbing away already—the destruction they'd set off hadn't just blown off a chunk, it had triggered what felt like an earthquake.

It happened in a second: one moment the ground was shaking beneath her feet, and the next it wasn't there at all. Ashi screamed in terror as, quite suddenly, she found herself falling.

Carth watched from his tunnel in horror, as it dawned on him at the same time that the explosion was too big. Almost in slow motion, he watched the terentek drop into the gorge. The next moment, clouds of dust obscured his view. In a futile attempt to see, he leaned closer, just in time to hear a scream that was most definitely human, and sent his heart flying into his throat.

Then there was silence.

Slowly, the dust settled, and he took a couple nervous steps forward, expecting the ground to crumble beneath his feet. It didn't. He glanced around at the damage, fighting a wave of horror. Almost the entire cliff was gone, and there was no sign of her.

"Ashi?" he called, but there was no reply. He shook his head. _Come on!_ She couldn't be gone, just like that. It was impossible. Someone so _there_ couldn't cease to exist so suddenly. "Ashi!" he shouted again, frantically.

There was a sudden cough, and then he heard a voice, weak but definitely alive, snap, "I could use some fracking _help_…"

Throwing caution to the winds, he raced over, with a flood of relief and joy. He had to kneel on the very edge to find her. Her face was scratched and bloody, and pale as a sheet, and she was clinging desperately to the rock with equally cut-up fingers. "Are you okay?" he demanded, offering a hand.

"What kind of stupid question is that?" she muttered. He grinned, despite himself, reassured that she was fine. She reached up to grab hold, and tried to plant her feet on the side of the cliff to get up.

But as soon as her feet touched the rock, it crumbled away. Her gaze was torn helplessly down to the gaping chasm, into which the falling rocks vanished. She couldn't hear them hit the bottom. Her feet scrabbled desperately in midair, and she lost her grip on the edge, gasping in shock and horror. All the cockiness from a moment ago vanished, as she hung over the edge, held only by his grip. "Help!" she repeated, this time in terror. She hadn't thought she was scared of heights, but then again, there was scared of heights, and there was _this_.

"I've got you," Carth murmured back, his voice was even and reassuring. Ashi nodded, and reached up, grabbing for a handhold. This one stayed. Slowly, painfully, she heaved herself up over the edge, and then collapsed, shivering, into his arms.

He wasn't sure how long they sat like that, his arms around her and her face pressed into his shoulder as her breathing slowly eased. Part of Ashi was noting how it felt nice, even beyond reassuring, but she shoved that thought back to the bottom of her mind. All she wanted to think about now was the wonderful fact that she was alive, and very much _not_ splattered all over a canyon floor.

"Never again," he heard her say finally, her voice muffled against his shoulder.

He nodded and smiled, no thoughts in his mind except relief at what had happened, and horror at what could have. It was reassuring to feel her in his arms, to be sure that she was all right. "I thought…" he started, and trailed off.

She pulled away, getting slowly to her feet. A ripple of blue light traced her skin, and in an instant the majority of the cuts were gone. "Relax," she smiled. "I don't plan on dying for a very long time."

"You're all right?" he added, concerned.

To her credit, Ashi managed a grin. "Never better. What's a day without a near-death experience?"

"Oh, I don't know… welcome?"

She rolled her eyes. "The answer was boring."

"Huh. I was going to say peaceful."

"No way," Ashi laughed. "There's a very thin line between peaceful and boring that the Jedi don't know exists."

Carth shrugged. "Well, there's a fine line between near-death experiences and, uh, _death_ that I'm not sure you know about, either."

Ashi shrugged. "Whatever you say, flyboy. If and when I find that line, you can say I told you so." She started off down the tunnel again.

Carth followed, glad Ashi was too busy reveling in being alive to pay him any attention. Like it or not, his thoughts kept gravitating helplessly towards her. In his head, the moment when he thought she'd been gone played over and over. It was strange: he'd known her only half a year, but he hadn't realized until that moment how much of a constant she was, or how much of a difference she'd made to him. He couldn't imagine losing her.

She looked over at him and smirked, and he realized with a jolt that his gaze had gravitated to her as well. "I'm not going to pass out or something," she insisted. "You can stop staring."

"I wasn't staring!" he objected instantly, prompting a mutter of 'sure, sure.' Luckily, they arrived at the students' camp at that moment, saving him the awkwardness.

"You're back!" Thalia May leapt expectantly to her feet. "Did you kill it?"

"Unless it survived the fall," Ashi shrugged. The ex-Sith frowned, confused, and she added quickly, "Yeah, don't worry. It's gone."

All the students were staring now, some in disbelief and some in amazement. There was a long pause, and then a green Twi'lek murmured slowly, "No fracking _way_."

Ashi smiled. "Yes, fracking way. You can go, if you want."

"We… we can go?" Thalia May repeated. "I… thank you! We weren't expecting help from someone in the academy."

"Yeah, well, I did say I wasn't a Sith," Ashi shrugged. Pride gave her more nonchalance for her victory over the terentek, and her near-disaster seemed further and further away now.

The girl nodded. "That's right. You're a Jedi, aren't you?" Ashi opened her mouth to object, but she continued obliviously, "Maybe… maybe the Jedi would accept us. We've seen how evil the dark side is… maybe we can try."

Ashi suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. _Out of the frying pan…_

"At any rate, thank you again. You've saved our lives. Good luck," she added, before beckoning to her friends. They must have been counting on Ashi's return, because they all had bags that they shouldered, and they began to follow her down the tunnel.

Ashi stared. "Oops."

"The Jedi are going to be so proud of you," Carth remarked with a smirk. The next moment, he regretted speaking, when Ashi reached out with the Force and smacked him upside the head.

"Stuff it," she muttered, and turned, heading in the opposite direction, back toward the academy.

* * *

The next morning, Ashi had only just turned the corner from her room when a hand grabbed her shoulder. She found herself spun around to face Dustil, who was staring at her in a way that made her suspect he was questioning her sanity.

"What did you _do_?" he demanded, his face drawn and incredulous. Ashi raised her eyebrows.

"Is this a trick question?"

"With the renegade students," he clarified quickly, lowering his voice.

"Long story or short one?"

"Is there a difference?"

Ashi shrugged. "Well, I nearly die in the long one." When he gave her a look of desperation, she explained, "I killed a terentek and helped them get out of the Shyrack Caves. Why?"

"They showed up in the colony, hitching a ride off-world," Dustil hissed angrily.

"So? And the big problem is?"

"Hitching a ride," he repeated, "to _Dantooine_."

Ashi paused, and then lifted a hand to her face, covering her eyes. "Ah," she said finally. "Right. I can imagine that would be bad."

"Oh, _they're_ fine," he shrugged, "amazingly. But _you're_ not going to be. Uthar is furious—he wanted them killed painfully and then put out on display. You should keep a low profile for the next few days."

That made sense, and Ashi considered with a shudder that she had been about to go claim responsibility for the students' disappearance for prestige. "Thanks, kid," she replied, with genuine gratitude, and he nodded briskly and turned away.

Dustil had been right, and she was even more thankful when she reached the main hall. Uthar was stalking around, busy looking terrifying. His tattooed face was murderous and Ashi was pretty sure anyone who spoke to him was going to get his or her face fried off.

Obediently, she kept a lower profile for about a week, working instead on excelling in her classes—boring, but useful. She was impressive in manipulation and hand-to-hand combat, and that was enough to excuse her from not using dark Force powers every other moment. Also, she couldn't have gone to the Valley anyway—the dust storms ran on for another couple weeks, and it was almost half a month before she got the chance to earn some real prestige again. When the time came, too, she was eager—the Sith planet was still strange and disturbing to her, and she was already ready to leave.

Ajunta Pall's tomb did not make anything less disturbing.

There were really only three words for it—_absolutely fracking terrifying_—when Ashi turned and came face-to-face with the eight-foot ghost. It took all her willpower not to run, but fortunately, he didn't seem very violent. In fact, he looked completely miserable. That was maybe the most surprising of all. Out of all the emotions from a dead Sith, she never expected remorse.

But it was remorse she got from the specter, in overwhelming amounts, especially after she asked about the sword. "Ah," he sighed. "I have regretted for so long… all that I had done. My sword… I filled it with my pride, and it is buried with me now. A corpse… as I am a corpse. I am dead, as my faith is dead, and I shall remain here… surrounded by blackness in death as in life."

She couldn't help thinking he was a little melodramatic, but then again, he had been here for nearly eternity. And he looked so pathetic, she couldn't really be annoyed with him. "I feel bad for you," she said, without thinking.

The ghost regarded her curiously. "Most of my brethren would desire only to take… even if it would destroy them," it said slowly, almost to itself. Then, slowly, it nodded. "I wish my sword to be… taken away from here. I do not wish for it to rot as I have." It paused, and then added firmly, "I command this of you."

"Oh, okay. Well, as long as I've been _commanded_."

"If you are wise… you will not keep it. It is what destroyed me."

"All right." Ashi nodded slowly. "Take the freaky sword but don't keep it. Can do." Hands up in a gesture of peace, she moved slowly to the sarcophagus and opened it. Then she frowned.

"There's three of them."

"Only one is truly my sword," it explained. "It has been so long… I do not remember which. But find the sword that was mine, and place it on the statue. If it is truly mine, it is yours."

"If it's… not yours?"

"Then… you will die. Such is the way it must be."

"Cheerful," Ashi replied brightly. "And you couldn't give me, like, a hint or something?"

The spirit paused, and then nodded suddenly. "I do remember… one thing of my sword. It was written of it long, long ago. Listen to me carefully: I am that which grips the heart in fright, hearkens the night, and silences the light."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Sounds like Jolee," she muttered to Carth, but shrugged and took out the swords. "All right. So… not the silver-lined one, because that's light, and…" She stopped, and picked up the vibroblade, tossing it from hand to hand experimentally. "This one's just a vibroblade. Which means…"

She reached for the last sword, and knew as soon as she touched it that it was right. The sword was icy to the touch, the metal dusky and cold, and seemed to ring with darkness. She stood with it slowly, mesmerized. This sword… with it in her hand, she felt more powerful than ever in her life. She could have killed Malak at that very moment if she wanted, or ruled the universe. No one could defeat the wielder of such a sword…

She wrenched her mind away from those thoughts with difficulty. Ajunta Pall was right; there was something seriously twisted about his weapon of choice. Quickly, she paced across to the statue and placed the sword at its feet.

"Yes!" the spirit said, its voice stronger. "Yes, that is it, that is the blade that destroyed me. Take it, it and the other blades, even… take it and go. My darkness awaits me…"

Ashi picked the sword up again, this time expecting and able to ignore the rush she got just from touching it. Then she glanced back over at the ghost, who was looking as depressed as she thought a ghost could possibly look.

"You don't have to stay, do you?" she asked.

"Don't… have to? But… what choice have I?"

Ashi sighed inwardly. Carth was right; the Jedi _would_ be proud of her. "You could go back to the light side, couldn't you?"

"Return? But… I betrayed my old Masters. They would never let me return to the light side. It is too late… too late…"

She shook her head. "The light side isn't really that exclusive. They took me, and I'm no Jedi or anything. I don't think they'd turn you away. I mean," she added, looking around the cold tomb, "you've suffered long enough, right?"

It stared at her for a long moment, and then sighed. "If… if I could return," it murmured. "Oh, my Master… it has been… so long… and I regret so much…"

Then, the strangest thing of all happened. The spirit's aura had been typical Sith: blood red and swirling like a storm with fury and angst. As Ashi watched, more with her Force-vision than her eyes, the aura faded slowly, to be replaced by a blue glow. Ajunta Pall smiled; his eyes, previously glowing gold, faded to a deep brown. Then a new light began to shine from inside him, starting in his chest and glowing white-hot. Ashi lifted a hand to shield her face as it grew almost painfully bright… and then, the spirit was gone.

Ashi stared at the place where it had been. There was a long silence, and then she murmured, "_Whoa_."

"Wow," Carth nodded. There was really nothing else to say. They stood in a sort of respectful silence for a moment, and then he asked, "What now?"

Ashi frowned. "I guess we just… take the swords and go. Yeah." She lifted the three blades, tucking them across her back, before turning to the statue one last time. She felt like she should say something, but what was there to say? Good luck?

"Bye," she compromised finally, and left the tomb.

But, typically, she wouldn't be able to get away free with her good deed. They were a couple minutes or so from the exit when Ashi sensed a figure ahead, trying to stealth themselves but not doing it very well.

"Who's there?" she called. Carth looked at her doubtfully, but the next moment, the figure came into view.

In the shadowy hall, she could only just discern the face of the first Sith she'd met on Korriban. "You're… Shaardan, aren't you?" she asked, and he affirmed it with a scowl. "What're you doing here? Because if you want the ghost, it's gone."

He looked at her skeptically—evidently he hadn't heard of the ghost—and then shook his head. "I saw you come in here, and rather suspected you'd make it all the way to the sarcophagus. Good to see I wasn't wrong."

"I'll repeat the question," she sighed. "What are you doing here?"

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked. "I've been hoping someone would go get the sword for a long time. Now that you have it, I just thought I'd relieve you of it. It must be quite a burden, after all."

Ashi smiled and shook her head. "No, I think I'll manage with it just fine. Nice of you to offer, though."

He snorted. "Impressive bravado. But do you really I'd let this chance for prestige go? Being a Sith is all about taking chances when the moment is right. So make it easier on both of us—give me that sword."

"And if I don't?"

"You die. Rule of the Sith: only the strong and cunning survive. You won't be missed… trust me."

The next moment, Carth almost felt bad for Shaardan. Ashi stared at him slowly, and her eyes narrowed. "You calling me weak?"

"I thought that was fairly clear."

Ashi took a deep breath through her teeth, and then nodded. "Sure. Yeah. You can have the sword. Here." She reached back and pulled out the vibroblade. With a flick of her wrist, she tossed it lightly over to him; he flinched as it flew through the air, but caught it.

"It feels like… just a regular sword."

"Ah, well," Ashi said coolly, "that's the clever part, isn't it?"

He paused, and then smiled. "Excellent! The sword is mine! Fool," he sneered at Ashi, before throwing out a hand and shoving her and Carth to the ground. Quickly, he made for the exit.

Ashi looked after him, fighting the urge to trip him, or maybe shoot him in the back. She counteracted her wishful thinking with the thought that that would only be good for about five seconds, and then she would regret it. Whereas letting him go to Uthar…

_Now _that_ would be interesting_, she mused, as they hurried back to the academy.

* * *

**r&r, please--nothing's better motivation, and anyway, it gets you a quote. I need motivation, too; I'm tackling an epiphany right now... haha, let's see what you make of that.**

**--skrybble  
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	15. Darkness

**Hey guys!****The third of four chapters of Korriban. Fluff is coming for real, and there's a bunch more in the chapter after this. I'm talking, Carth reconciles with his past kind of fluff. But for now, all of you can find out what happens if you give Shaardan the wrong sword.  
Oh, and something else. I'm editing pieces of Taris (I had a _wtf?_ moment looking over my old chapters) and for anyone in need of irony, check out the dueling championship.  
And--finally--I think that's it. Enjoy!

* * *

**

**Darkness: wickedness or evil; the absence of light**

Shaardan was feeling extremely pleased with himself. He had managed to get the sword, at last, _and_ at no personal effort whatsoever. This must be worth a mountain of prestige from Master Uthar—surely, it would put him in the lead over Mekel. And if Ashi were smart, she would just give up at this point. She'd given in to him; she obviously had no creditability left… whereas _he_ was about to be selected.

Master Uthar was prowling the main hall when Shaardan approached. "Master," he said reverently, bowing his head.

"What is it, my young pupil? You have yet to gain much prestige."

Shaardan smirked. "I believe you will find this worthy, Master," he replied, drawing the blade from his belt with a smug flourish. "I have found the sword of Ajunta Pall."

Ashi watched from around the corner, biting down a snicker. _Any minute now…_

Uthar raised his eyebrows coldly. "Indeed. Very well, allow me to see it." He held out a pale, dark-veined hand.

Shaardan handed over the sword, barely able to fight down the grin. "I believe you will find it…" he began, but was cut off sharply.

"You idiot boy!" Uthar exclaimed, examining the sword with disgust. "This is a mere vibroblade!"

"What?" Shaardan demanded. Then, with a terrible growing dread, he realized what must have happened. _She'd tricked him! That little schutta had tricked him!_

"Did you presume to attempt to pass off a pathetic vibroblade as the _legendary sword of Ajunta Pall_? Did you think that I would not be able to tell?"

Shaardan was past words—he simply whimpered as the master's gold eyes fixed on his, burning with fury and frustration. Uthar raised a hand slowly, and the student suddenly gasped. He began to rise into the air, hands scrabbling desperately at his throat as he lost the ability to breathe.

Ashi stared in horror. She'd expected him to get yelled at, yes, killed or expelled, yes, but not this. She didn't mean for this.

That had been naïve of her.

All the Sith watched in morbid fascination as Shaardan turned slowly purple and then blue. Finally, his body jerked, and then his eyes rolled up into his head. He was still. Ashi looked away, eyes tightly closed and ashamed. With a flick of his wrist, Uthar flung the corpse away, snapping its neck. It landed with a mundane thud, head at a sickening angle. He glared at the crowd that had assembled.

"Do any more of you wish to waste my time?"

Ashi cleared her throat, stepping around the corner and effectively drawing everyone's gaze. _Get over it_, she told herself fiercely. _He would have killed you. Now he's dead. All good._ Still, she specifically kept her gaze off the body on the floor as she approached Uthar.

"I have the _real_ sword."

Uthar raised his eyebrows again. "Indeed." He took the dark blade she handed to him, and his eyes half-closed in ecstasy as he touched it. "Ah…" he sighed. "Yes… this is the true sword. Well done, my student. This is worthy of much prestige."

"Great." Ashi, busy averting her eyes from Shaardan, couldn't muster enthusiasm.

"Now, my student," he continued, "there are only two of you left in the competition to join the glory of the Sith. I believe it is fitting you be tested—to make sure there are no more pathetic hopefuls like this rat." He stopped to glare at Shaardan's body. "I suspect it might have been him who allowed the renegade students to escape. It is just as well he is dead."

_I'm not sure he'd agree,_ Ashi thought dryly, and then felt guilty.

"Come to the training hall tomorrow morning. There, you and Mekel will receive your challenge."

Ashi nodded. "Certainly, Master. I'll be there."

"Excellent." Uthar smiled. "You may go." He waved Ashi away, and she nodded and turned, keeping her pace steady and even and her face impassive, even as she heard him mutter, "Someone dispose of the body."

As soon as she was around the corner and into the hall, Ashi's footsteps quickened, and she raced down the empty hallway, Carth right behind her. She made it to her room before him. Carth entered, moment later, to find her slumped onto her bed, back against the stone wall. Her eyes were downcast, away from him, and her fingers played absently with the edge of the blanket.

"Ashi…" he started, and then stopped. "Ashi, it's not your fault."

"It is!" she replied. "I should have tried to talk him out of it. That was wrong, what Uthar did. He didn't deserve that."

Carth couldn't argue with that, but he still shook his head as he sat down beside her. "He would have attacked you anyway. You would have had to kill him."

Ashi was quiet for a very long moment, crossing her arms sullenly. Then he heard her mutter, "I _hate_ Korriban."

"I'm with you," he agreed sadly.

"It's so evil, and… and…" Ashi stumbled for adjectives, gesturing vaguely. "_Serious!_ That's what it is. It's like… Dantooine's evil twin, or something."

Carth snickered, and she glared petulantly. "But it is! Everything's so heavy all the time. If you're not redeeming some freaky Sith ghost, you're getting blown off cliffs."

"That's only you, beautiful."

"Ah." She paused, and then shrugged. "Well, I try."

With a sigh, she leant back against the wall. "But… still. I don't know, Carth. I can't describe it, but this whole planet just has this kind of aura…" She broke off, grimacing. How did you explain this to a Force-blind?

Carth nodded suddenly. "No… I think I know what you mean. The whole place is… off, somehow."

Ashi raised her eyebrows in surprise. "You can sense that?"

He shrugged quickly. "Not well, or anything. You probably feel it more than I do. You know, being a Jedi and all."

He winced as Ashi kicked him; she managed a small grin when he threw her a rueful look.

"I think being a Jedi requires some degree of maturity," she replied, "but if I ever get to that stage, I'll let them know." He laughed, and her faint smile grew a little wider, but then she sobered. "What you're sensing? That's the dark side."

Carth had suspected that, but it threw him a little all the same to hear it. He felt slightly confused. Obviously, he didn't, and couldn't ever, understand the Force like someone who commanded it, but how did that work? Contaminating an actual physical place?

She seemed to sense his confusion, and frowned. "What do you know about the dark side?" she asked, but it didn't sound like she was quizzing him. If anything, it seemed she was hoping he might know.

"Not very much," he admitted. "I used to think it was just… well, just a fancy name for all the corruption in the galaxy—the Exchange, the Sith, all of that. But I think it's more than that for you J—for Force users," he corrected quickly. "There's almost a new level of danger for you."

Ashi nodded, but didn't interrupt. What Carth was saying interested her too much for her to stop his train of thought. "You've got more power, so it's easier for you to misuse it. There's more temptation for you. Of course," he added, "I don't know a lot about Jedi and Sith, but I've seen people fall before." His eyes hardened.

"Was that a very subtle reference to Saul?" asked Ashi wryly, and he gave her a sharp look.

"Plenty of people," he said pointedly. "Soldiers who switch sides for power. I met Malak once."

Ashi's mouth dropped open. "Really? Like, pre-jaw and everything?"

Despite himself, Carth chuckled wearily. "Yeah. Back then, I was actually impressed by him." He gave a wry smile at the memory. "Now I'd like nothing better to put a blaster to his head. And Revan's, too," he added as an afterthought. "If she wasn't already dead."

Ashi nodded, staring up at the ceiling. Though it wasn't immediately obvious, she was listening hard. "To think, her best friend killed her," Carth mused. "Not that she didn't have it coming—but I guess it shows how much the dark side can change someone. You think you know them, and then they fall, so they're the same but completely the opposite—like the flip side of a coin. Take you or Bastila, for instance."

Ashi visibly stiffened, both at the association with the brat and what Carth was implying. "What about me and Bastila?" she demanded icily, and he backtracked.

"It's not that I think you're going to fall; just that I could see it. Either one of you… I could imagine it, that's all."

Ashi was still staring at him, not yet satisfied with his answer. "I'm _not_ a Sith, Carth."

"I'm just _saying_," he repeated. "It must be even harder for you. But that you haven't changed at all… it's incredible."

She smirked. "I'm perfect the way I am."

Carth shook his head. "Of course," he replied dryly. There was a brief pause, and then he glanced over at her. It occurred to him that she seemed very tired: dark shadows were forming around her eyes and she looked generally disheveled. As he watched, she reached up to rub her shoulder absentmindedly, grimacing.

"Here," he offered, reaching out a hand. She paused, and then, with a relenting shrug, moved closer. Carth lifted his hands to her shoulders, working his fingers along the stiff muscles, and Ashi sighed contentedly.

"Thanks," she murmured, and he nodded.

He couldn't see her face, but he could tell from her tensed shoulders that she had something else that was bothering her. "What's on your mind?" he asked after a pause.

Ashi bit down a groan. _Stop being so damn perceptive._ There was something bothering her, but it wasn't something she had planned to share. The ever-present déjà vu hadn't stayed behind on Kashyyyk, and it worried her even more now. Sith techniques came to her with curious ease, and the whole place that felt so wrong still felt so disturbingly familiar.

She debated telling him, for a fraction of a second, but there were only two real outcomes to that: he figured she was suffering from lack of sleep or she'd cracked. They both sounded bad, and she decided to exercise economy with the truth.

"Just thinking," she replied calmly, and forced herself to ignore it. It was much easier just to focus on Carth's hands, warm and gentle as they eased the stiffness out of her shoulders. A yawn appeared unexpectedly on her lips, and he smiled.

"You should get some sleep. Didn't Uthar say you've got a challenge tomorrow?"

"Fun," Ashi muttered sarcastically, but nodded. She shrugged off her robe and tossed it unceremoniously on the floor. Her boots and tool belt followed suit, and she wormed her way under the blankets in her undershirt and leggings.

"Night, flyboy," she mumbled softly, closing her eyes.

She fell asleep quickly, but Carth sat awake for a while, thinking. Now he could consider it without feeling like he was breaking a taboo, he realized Ashi really was a lot like Morgana. She had the same temper and was just as easy to set off, but they had both had strong morals, too, strong beliefs. It was only that that had made Morgana let him to war—she understood his desires to do the right thing as only she ever had.

Well, until Ashi. But then again, Ashi had a way with people when she wanted to, an uncanny sort of insight. She understood him, and Canderous, and Jolee, and, in fact, the whole damn crew. It was, frankly, amazing.

He gazed down at the figure next to him, bedraggled and fiery-haired, curled in a ball with the blanket pulled tightly around her. Did she look like Morgana, too? He couldn't remember… _he couldn't remember._

The enormity of it hit him like a meteorite. He searched his mind desperately, but he couldn't picture her face, even though he could hear her laugh now, and imagine her small, worn hands, the hands of an untiring worker. Memories flowed through his mind freely, happy to be released from the dam he usually kept them behind. He flicked through them desperately, but to no avail: he couldn't remember what her face looked like.

Slowly he got up off the bed and sank down to the floor. He closed his eyes, but sleep was slow in coming, and when it finally did it was guilty and restless. He couldn't believe he'd _forgotten_…

* * *

"Ashi? Are you awake?"

"No," she groaned, covering her face with her arms.

She heard a muffled laugh, but then another, "Ashi!"

"Go away," she replied; it came out near incoherent.

"Ashi, get up," said the voice insistently. "You've got your test."

Her eyes jolted open. "Frack!" she exclaimed, leaping out of bed. "What time is it?"

Carth shrugged. "I'm not sure. But you should probably get going." Ashi nodded; she was already out of bed, rushing to the fresher with her Sith robes in hand. He heard the shower turn on, and she yelped.

"Damn, it's cold!"

He chuckled, but it faded quickly. The guilt was still fresh in his mind from the previous night, and sleep had done nothing for his memory. Morgana's face still eluded him, and it filled him with a horrible shame. How could he possibly forget something like that?

Ashi stumbled out, fastening her robe. She grabbed her boots and began to tug them on, running a hand quickly through her hair, before she noticed Carth. He looked positively miserable. "What's wrong?" she asked, stopping mid-hop to glance up at him curiously.

"Nothing," he replied immediately, with stolid determination, and she rolled her eyes.

"I don't even need empathy to know _something's_ bugging you. What is it?"

He debated replying, but uncertainty filled him and he shook his head adamantly. "I'm fine. You should go," he insisted, and she frowned at him before leaving the room.

"You better tell me when I get back."

"…damned persistent woman in the galaxy…" she caught, and grinned, before hurrying down the corridors. Headmaster and student were both waiting when she arrived, and she bowed her head apologetically before pacing over to stand next to Mekel. Uthar stood in front of them, looking evil and sadistic as usual.

"Welcome, my young students," he drawled slowly. "As you know, there are now only two of you left, after Shaardan's failure yesterday."

Mekel smirked at that. Ashi's face was unreadable. Uthar smiled; it was cold and icy, and full of bad omens.

"Typically, the remaining two students would fight each other for the final test," he said. Ashi and Mekel glanced over at each other, hands flying to their lightsabers. The Sith Master held up a hand. "_However_, as there is one tomb that no student has yet retrieved anything from, your final test will pertain to that."

He suddenly fixed each of them with an piercing look. "Your task, students, is to retrieve the mask of Tulak Hord from his tomb. The student to return to me with it will be the one to proceed onward to the final test." He paused, and let that sink in. Mekel looked excited. Ashi simply nodded. It was a contest, and that was simple enough. All you had to do with a contest was win it.

"Any ways you use to win the challenge will be acceptable," Uthar added. "Use any means you desire to achieve your ends."

_Ah. Okay. An open invitation to kill each other._ Ashi gave an inward sigh. _Damn_. She didn't plan to take advantage of that, but she didn't think Mekel was quite so virtuous.

"You may begin now," Uthar commanded. "Return to me in no less than two days." He stepped back, and indicated with a wave of his hand that they should start killing each other.

Ashi had predicted Mekel's line of thought—his plan would be to get rid of her, and then to get the mask without disturbances. She sensed his attack through the Force before she had even spun to look at him: Force lightning, but she fended it off with a wave of her hand. Counterattacking, she shoved him to the ground before locking him in a paralysis.

Uthar seemed slightly surprised she didn't follow the attack up with killing him, but Ashi ignored that and took off, using the Force to give her extra speed. The idea was to get to the tomb before Mekel; from there she could simply shut him out. Dustil and Carth looked a little caught off guard when she whirled to a stop in front of them, but as soon as she managed to get out something about a competition for the final test, Carth was on his feet and Dustil was reaching for his lightsaber.

Ashi winced. The stasis Mekel was in still held, but it was becoming painful to keep him there while he fought. "You can use speed, right?" she panted to Dustil, and he nodded quickly. She held out a hand to Carth. "Don't let go," she instructed firmly, and he took hold of it and nodded.

The next moment she was moving at a speed that shouldn't have been humanly possible. It was half exhilarating, but she could feel her body beginning to ache, and her head was spinning. She couldn't keep up the pace and hold Mekel in the stasis, and it felt like an easy choice. Before she could reconsider, she let him go.

A new burst of energy flooded through her, and she grinned happily. It didn't matter that she wasn't holding him any more. They had made it to the exit to the valley. They were going to get there first.

Someone was behind her.

She felt his presence a moment before the rock walls on either side of her collapsed in a massive avalanche. Cruel, satisfied laughter came from behind her, just audible over the rumble of boulders. Mekel had caught up, she realized with a sickening feeling. She'd underestimated him.

She threw up her hands, palms out, and a flickering blue shield materialized just in time to stop the landslide that threatened to crush them. Ashi's arms stiffened, and then locked, as the entire weight began to rest on her. A bead of sweat ran down her face, and her legs began to shake after a moment. Carth and Dustil were staring up, apparently still processing the fact that they weren't dead.

"Help!" she croaked, and Dustil snapped to. He lifted a hand, shoving it outward in a sudden, sharp motion. The boulders shattered into rubble, which looked good, but was fairly easy—Ashi wished she'd thought of it. The weight vanished, mercifully, though she held the shield a moment longer, making sure none of the smaller rocks fell on them.

She looked over to see Mekel's reaction. He was staring at them still, probably due to the rocks' explosion, which had, to be fair, been very impressive. However, as he took in the shield that had just vanished, Ashi could almost see his train of thought, moving slowly but surely to bad places. Force shields were incredibly light-sided. No real Sith could ever have cast one of those.

As he opened his mouth, a knowing smirk appearing on his face, Ashi threw out a hand, and lightning sparked from her fingertips. It was desperation—like in the cave on Dantooine—but harder to justify this time, as she was completely aware of what she was doing. With some effort, she stopped, jerking her hand away, and then flung Mekel against the rock wall.

"_Go_!" she instructed, grabbing Carth and Dustil, and began to run with renewed Force speed.

"I thought that was a dark power," Carth called uncertainly over the rush of wind. She grimaced, debating whether a reply, in the form of a weak excuse, would make a difference. Luckily, they arrived at the tomb at that moment.

Ashi stepped forward, surveying it with interest. There was a lock on the entrance, embedded with remnants of the Force, and some kind of runes on the stone framing the door. She ran her fingertips along them, murmuring under her breath. Dustil and Carth waited in patient silence as she translated.

Finally she straightened, grinning. "It's not too bad," she said, not turning around as she pressed her palm to the door. "It's an ancient Force lock, but I'm pretty good at slicing them. It should only take a few…"

Right on cue, the door slid open. The next second, just as took a step in, she heard a strangled voice from behind her choke, "Ashi!"

She spun immediately, eyes widening as she saw Dustil levitated in the air, clutching at his throat. Carth had just fallen to the ground. Mekel snapped his fingers, and the string of reddish light between himself and the pilot vanished. He was completely healed.

"_You're_ not a Sith," he said slowly, smirking. Then he raised a hand, a sadistic grin on his face, and lightning flew from his outstretched fingers. Ashi screamed out loud. She was burning; excruciating pain wracked her body like fire. She had time to decide to herself she would never use Force lightning again; then something hard and metallic came down on the base of her skull. A starburst of pain exploded through her head in the moment before she hit the ground.

Ashi awoke with the inside of her mouth coated in dust, and a vicious pain in the back of her head. She tried to sit up, but nausea overwhelmed her. Leaning to the side, she retched emptily, and then rested back on her hands, breathing hard.

She was lying on the ground, sheltered by an overhang from the valley walls. A dark sky above her was scattered with stars, and the murky moon was rising at the edge of the valley. She had been out for at least ten hours, then; it had been morning when Uthar assigned the challenge. Cautiously, she lifted a hand to the back of her head. She could feel dried blood in her hair, and a stabbing pain, despite the small numbing that kolto provided. She concentrated, and then smiled in satisfaction when the wound closed over, and the throbbing eased.

Now able to think clearly, she glanced around. She had Carth's jacket around her—which was sort of nice—but he was nowhere to be found. The same went for Dustil.

"Hello?" she called weakly, coughing at the end.

"Ashi?" She heard footsteps from around a corner, and then both of them appeared. Carth looked all right, but Dustil had a ring of dark, painful-looking bruises around his neck.

She slowly leant forward, getting to her knees. Carth offered a hand and she took it gratefully, pulling herself to her feet. "Choked?" she asked Dustil, and he nodded ruefully. "C'mere," she said, holding out a hand.

His face betrayed his uncertainty as he came closer, but she gently placed a hand on his neck, and a coil of blue light sparked across his skin. The bruises vanished as it brushed over them.

Dustil smiled and nodded. "That's useful," he commented gratefully, rubbing his neck. "He—Mekel—tried to choke me… and I think he went into the tomb after he got rid of us."

"Surprised he didn't kill us."

"He probably figured Uthar can do worse than him after yesterday," Dustil shrugged, and then realized that didn't sound very reassuring. Ashi looked nervous.

"He hasn't gone to Uthar yet, has he?" she asked nervously. She would never get the map now, if that were the case.

"No." Dustil shook his head. "That's the weird part. See, he went in, but he hasn't come out yet, and it's been all day."

Ashi frowned. "Yeah, you'd think he'd be hurrying, since…" She stopped, her eyes lighting up in realization. "There's something in there."

"Tuk'ata?" Carth wondered skeptically, but she shook her head.

"A trap. Or something. He's caught in it."

"Ah." Dustil caught on. "We gonna take advantage of it?"

She smirked. "Maybe if I feel like it, I'll save his sorry ass," she replied. "And maybe I'll just let him stay. C'mon," she grinned, and they followed her to the door.

Mekel must either have been counting on them giving up, or he wasn't as good at locks and breaking them as Ashi. The tomb doors grated open with no resistance. Ashi peered in. It was dark and musty, like Ajunta Pall's tomb had been, and smelled like tuk'ata. Tuk'ata didn't smell good.

She gagged, and pulled back. "I don't see anything."

"We'll have to go in," Dustil declared, flicking on his lightsaber eagerly.

"Whoa," Ashi interrupted, grabbing his shoulder. "_We_ go. _You_ stay."

Dustil's face suddenly looked frighteningly like Carth. "No," he replied, matching her for stubbornness. "I'm coming. I know way more about Korriban than you."

Ashi shook her head. "Nothing personal, kid. But your dad's not going to let me let you walk into a trap. You're going to stay here," she said, pointing firmly to the ground at his feet, "and if Mekel comes, you can slow him down. Better yet, stop him." Dustil looked unconvinced, but she added, "Last line of defense. And if we're not out by… let's say, morning, you have permission to come look for us."

Dustil looked appeased, and nodded. Ashi pointed again, and, rolling his eyes, he sat down on a rock near the entrance.

"Good luck," they heard him mutter, as they stepped into the tomb.

Ashi and Carth walked uneasily through the tomb. If it was bad during the day, it was positively haunting at night. The memory of Ajunta Pall, and the thought that there was some kind of trap here, was putting both of them on edge. It was puzzlingly easy going; there were a few tuk'ata but a lot more tuk'ata corpses. Mekel obviously wasn't messing around. Then, around a turn, Ashi stopped suddenly and held out a hand.

"The trap?" Carth asked, and she nodded, gaze unfocused.

"Non-lethal… huh." She looked surprised. Unexpectedly, she turned to face him. "Hold still," she instructed, and Carth obliged uncertainly. She waved a hand, and he felt as though something was brushing across his skin, settling like a cobweb.

"What was that?" he demanded, lifting a hand to his face to find nothing there.

"Force cloaking," Ashi replied proudly. "Hides your aura. This way, you can see what happens after I go into the trap."

"You're walking into it?" he exclaimed, eyes widening. Ashi winced.

"Ooh," she said reproachfully, "don't do that. You've got to stay calm, it won't work otherwise."

She looked so firm that he took a deep breath, before repeating, "But you're just going to walk into this trap?"

She shrugged, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. "Why not?"

"It's a trap!" he replied in disbelief, before she frowned and he remembered to be calm. "You know it's there; you can go around or something!"

Ashi stared at him. "But if I do that, I'll deprive the trap of its reason to be. Besides," she added confidently, "I'll be _fine_. It's non-lethal, I promise. _Stay calm_." She grinned, and then walked through the doorway, head held high. She got about ten feet, and then a cloud of green gas erupted around her. Gasping, she swayed on the spot, before collapsing to the ground. It took all of Carth's willpower not to rush forward too, but he reminded himself that one of them needed to be conscious. He forced himself to be calm. Then, a mad, cackling laughter filled the tomb.

"So, another idiotic student has stumbled into my little web, eh?" cackled a voice, so high that its owner might as well have been gulping helium. "Well, the contact nerve toxin in the air should knock you out quickly enough." Carth's eyes widened and he clamped his mouth shut quickly—contact nerve toxin was highly toxic and spread easily. "Ha, ha, ha… _welcome_," said the voice, still shrill and disturbing.

As the gas cleared, an old man scuttled down the passage, grinning and tapping his fingers together in an erratic rhythm. His skin was pale, almost albino, with dark veins prominent against it. His eyes were also frightening: pure white, rimmed in red. He was smiling, but it had an edge of madness to it.

Carth stepped back into the shadows, and Ashi's cloaking seemed to work, because the man didn't notice him. He did, however, chuckle delightedly as he found Ashi.

"Here you are! Now, if you'll just come with me," he offered, as if Ashi could reply. He raised a hand like a conductor, and she was lifted to her feet, head lolling, like a marionette. Smiling widely, the old man began to walk away. Ashi's body followed, and Carth gave them a short lead before following behind.

They reached a sarcophagus chamber like Ajunta Pall's, and the man stopped. Carth hesitated outside the doorway: the cloaking seemed only to hide him in the Force, because he was still very much visible, and he wasn't going to risk being seen.

The man carefully marched Ashi to stand next to another figure in Sith robes. With a jolt, Carth realized it was Mekel. He looked much the worse for wear, for what Carth could see of him was either bloody or badly burned. He appeared unconscious, and paralyzed from the neck down.

As soon as Ashi was in position, the man stepped back. He admired his handiwork for a moment, lifting his fingers to make both of them stand up straighter, and then cooed, "Wake up, my dear, wake up!"

Ashi didn't stir, and Carth wasn't surprised. Nerve toxins knocked you out for at least three hours at a time, usually. Even a Jedi could probably only recover after one.

It seemed the man wasn't in a mood for waiting. His face contorted in frustration, and he snapped, "I said, _wake up!_" Lighting zigzagged through the air and struck Ashi; she cried out in pain.

Carth couldn't help the rush of anger that flooded through him at that, and he realized a second too late what he had done. He could picture Ashi rolling her eyes in exasperation as the man turned, eyes alight with malicious glee. "Methinks I sense another student," he cackled, advancing towards the door. "Methinks I spy a little student, right… _here!_"

Carth felt himself jerked forward, and stumbled around the corner into the room, where the old man eyed him suspiciously. "You're not a student," he murmured to himself. "No uniform, no uniform, and no Force either." He grinned. "Come to play our little game?" he asked. The next moment, lightning flew from his palm and struck Carth, tossing him in the air.

Ashi, to both their surprise, called out. "Hey!" she snapped, her voice surprisingly clear. "Don't do that!"

The man giggled. "Do what? Do _this_?"

Carth flew into the stone wall, hitting his head with a sickening crack. Ashi saw him knocked unconscious, and a fury filled her. The man began to cackle madly, but was suddenly interrupted when he was shoved from behind. He toppled to the floor, and then leapt up, wheeling to face Ashi with a smile.

"_You're_ a tricky one!" he exclaimed undauntedly, pointing at her with a knowing grin. "You'll be good at my game."

Ashi glared. "I'm not playing any games," she spat back, scowling.

He waggled a finger at her. "You're going to play my game whether you like it or not," he snapped. "I'll explain it to you, so you can join us. We've been playing for a while," he added, gesturing to Mekel. Ashi gulped, and the man grinned. "Time for some introductions, I suppose. This other student, I'm sure you know well enough. His name is Mekel." He beamed. "Say hello, Mekel."

Mekel groaned.

The man shook his head. "Poor lad, he's had a hard day. He wasn't very good at the game. Oh, wait." He drew himself up to his full height—incidentally, not very tall—and bowed mockingly. "_I_ am Jorak Uln. I was once the head of the academy, so I'm sure you've heard of _me_."

Ashi shook her head. "Nope. Never."

He scowled. "How very sad. I did hope that I might find some students who were properly educated. I do hope that you're better than this in the game." He looked at Mekel with disdain. "He was boring. He couldn't get anything right."

"Yeah. Well." Ashi glanced over at Mekel, who looked half-dead and like he had been fried alive. "I hope I'm good at it too." Then she paused. "What is the game?" she asked suspiciously.

"Ah, yes," Jorak smiled. "The main event." He folded his hands behind his back and began to pace back and forth in front of them with almost comical dignity. "You see, I would like to discover whether you have the _pluck _of an old-fashioned Sith. Most of the students Uthar has been passing through these days have been so _pathetic_! Take poor Mekel here. I already tested him… didn't I, Mekel?"

Mekel moaned again. Ashi was not impressed—was it that hard to talk? "Yes, yes, you're welcome," replied Jorak unsympathetically. "Mekel, you see, has the cruelty of a Sith, but not the _gumption_ I'm looking for."

Ashi grimaced. "Uh, look, I'm sure we can talk about this…"

Jorak cackled. "Oh, I'm sure we could! You could even try using your… your _feminine wiles_ on me!" he exclaimed with glee. "But I think you'll find I'm quite determined—and not above killing a woman."

Ashi shrugged. "Well, I'm not above killing a crazy old man, so I guess we're even."

He giggled. "Ooh, you _do_ have gumption. I think that you'll be good at this!"

Rolling her eyes, she muttered, "Whatever. Do your worst, creep."

Jorak put on a reproachful face, wagging a finger at her. "Now, is that any kind of attitude to take with higher education? I'm doing you a favor, really. So then, this is how it goes: I'm going to pose a moral question to you. Get it right, and I torture Mekel. Get it wrong, and I torture you." He looked over at Mekel, and then added, "I don't know how much more Mekel can take. He's rather weak. But don't get too many wrong, or you'll die yourself.

"I don't know what you think of Mekel," he added in a drawl. "Maybe you don't like him. Maybe you think he deserves to be murdered. Well, here's your chance. Fair enough?"

"Fair?" she echoed doubtfully. "I'm not even going to dignify that with a response."

Jorak didn't seem bothered. "Very well. Any other comments before we begin, Mekel?"

To Ashi's surprise, he did have a comment. "Both… survive…" Mekel mumbled. "Attack him… together…"

"Come, now, Mekel," chided Jorak. "Do you really think your friend here will answer questions wrong, just to save little old _you_? Risking her own life?" Ashi realized as he spoke that he was right. That was about as un-Sith-like as you could get. "And how many correctly answered questions before you die?" mused Jorak brightly. "Oh, no, you had your chance. On that note—let's begin."

* * *

**Cliffhanger! Oh, I love Jorak Uln. It's so much fun writing with crazy people XD**

**All right: I have a new question for anyone cool enough to be reading this. I might be looking for a beta for this story--obviously you guys know it's my first fanfic, so I don't know exactly how this works. However, anyone who would be interested, it would be awesome if you could let me know. Everyone else, you know the drill--r&r!**

**--skrybble**


	16. Mercy

**I feel very on top of things. Korriban's done--halfway point?!--and I'm finally managing school (a little. Don't hold me to that.) Thanks to everyone who reviewed, altho I'm still looking for a beta--maybe the more times I write it, the more it'll stick. But anyway, it _was_ a cliffhanger last time, so I won't digress any more.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, hopefully I would be too busy making KotOR 3 to write this.

* * *

**

**Mercy: compassion shown to an enemy or one in one's power**

Jorak smiled at Ashi. His eyes glittered in the darkness, the white visible all the way around. Quite frankly, he was creepy, and she tried hard not to show her disgust when she made eye contact.

"Your immediate superior among the Sith is an effective commander and a fine leader. He trusts you and you like him. You see an opportunity to kill him. What do you do?"

Ashi closed her eyes, swallowing a groan. How had Mekel possibly _failed_ this? It disgusted her a little that she knew the Sith better than a Sith.

Well, it didn't matter how well she knew them. She wasn't a Sith, and if that difference was important to her, she was going to have to swallow her pride—along with ditching most of her common sense.

"Nothing," she replied firmly. "He's a good commander. He's good for the Sith."

"Incorrect!" snapped Jorak. "What sort of thinking is that? If all the Sith thought like you, we'd be soft, like the Jedi! Ah, well," he continued, not sounding all too upset, "it's time for your punishment."

Lightning flew from his hand. Ashi jerked and screamed in pain. _Damn it, Mekel, you son of a schutta, if you try to kill me after this…_

After a long, agonizing moment, the torture ceased. Ashi blinked a couple times to clear her hazy vision, and then refocused on Jorak. "And so," he said delightedly, "we come to round two. You discover an aspect of the Force that gives you great power. Do you share it or keep it to yourself."

"I share it," Ashi replied in a monotone. "I make the Sith stronger as a whole."

"NO!" Jorak shrieked furiously. "You gained an advantage and you share it freely? Let them rip the secret from my dead hands, I say!" he crowed, impassioned. "To _share_ it? Really, are you mad?"

"I think so," muttered Ashi under her breath.

"Well," sighed the old man, "you did ask for this. It's for your own good," he added calmly, and again the lightning rendered her speechless with pain. Ashi gasped for breath after this time for a few moments. She could feel herself weakening—she was going to black out after too much more of this.

The next question, and the one after that, Ashi hardly heard, and by the fifth round, she simply shook her head, with no strength left to fake an answer. Mekel was staring at her by now, with a kind of grateful disbelief. With tremendous effort, Ashi gave him a look that made it clear he owed her.

"One more round," said Jorak, sounding almost regretful that it was over so soon. "You're about to die."

Ashi almost laughed weakly at that—apparently, it was supposed to relate to her situation. Jorak had underestimated her, very slightly. "Do you use your last breath to pass on your knowledge to your apprentice, to make him stronger," he asked, smirking, "or use it to strike out at your enemies?"

_It's a trick question._

The thought came to her unexpectedly. _The answer is neither. A true Sith never dies._

Ashi wasn't even going to try and figure out how she knew that, focusing instead on the implications. Playing by Jorak's rules, she couldn't win. And if you couldn't win, what did you do?

She knew the answer to this one as well. _Cheat_.

"Neither," she replied, her breathing ragged. "I use my last breath… to demand my apprentice… helps me out. He heals me… and then we kill… my enemies. Slowly… and… _painfully_."

Jorak's eyes widened, and Ashi could guess why—both healing and teamwork were practically taboo to a Sith, let alone a senile Sith Master. Mekel was bright enough to catch her drift, though. He held out a hand, and Jorak shrieked as a bright red light threaded from his chest to Mekel's. Then, good to his word, Mekel transferred it to Ashi, and she felt new energy fill her. Damn—it might be a dark power, but that was fracking useful. Jorak stumbled, suddenly weakened.

"What?" he exclaimed furiously, as Ashi forced her way out of the stasis and drew her lightsaber. A newfound smirk was curling her lips. "Mutiny! De… detention, for all of you! Permanent detention!"

Ashi and Mekel lunged simultaneously. The ex-headmaster shrieked in anger and backed up, flinging Force attacks at them as fast as he could, but it was no good. They were both angry with him for the 'lessons', and the battle was quick and brutal.

Mekel grinned weakly as Jorak collapsed, but then stumbled himself, catching himself on a wall. Ashi hesitated for a moment, torn—on one hand, Carth was still unconscious, on the other, Mekel had just saved her ass. And while he had tried to kill her before, she was inclined to be grateful right now…

She hurried over to the Sith, and realized with a guilty jolt that he'd healed her more than himself, despite needing it badly. Looked like he wasn't a true Sith either. She knelt beside him, and hissed, "Hold still."

Mekel nodded fervently, and she laid a hand on his chest, just below his neck. A burst of blue light appeared, sparking harshly on their eyes in the darkness, and then his burns began to smooth over. Calmly, as if she did this every day, Ashi moved a hand to his face, tracing it over a few cuts so they wouldn't scar badly. She felt extremely proud of herself; short of meditating, there were few things more light-sided than this.

He stared at her, seeming amazed that she had bothered with him at all. "I… I can't believe I'm alive," he murmured slowly, as she lifted her hands from his face. "You saved me… you could have just answered those questions and let me die."

Ashi shrugged, walking over to where Carth was lying. "Would you have preferred I did?"

"But…" He got up, walking over and sitting down next to her. Interest sparked in his eyes as he watched her gently examine Carth's head, and then press a hand to the wound. He was bleeding badly, but to fix it was straightforward. Mekel held a respectful silence as she healed, noticing but not commenting on the care she used, and then continued. "But you _saved_ me. Why didn't you just let me die?"

Ashi looked up, and fixed him with a piercing stare. "No one deserves to die like that. Not even Sith bastards who try to choke a sixteen-year-old."

Mekel glanced away, shamefaced. "Right. Sorry about that." He paused, and then added, "Dustil's all right, isn't he?"

For the first time, she smiled. "Of course, idiot. I can heal." When Mekel relaxed, she added sharply, "But that doesn't mean lightning isn't fracking painful."

He grimaced. "Yeah… well. I see what… I guess I understand what you mean. I've just… I've never been on that side of the fence before. It makes you think."

Ashi could sense an epiphany on the way, and kept quiet, waiting. "I'd be dead if you were a… well, a proper Sith. And you're not, are you?"

There was no point trying to pretend. She shook her head, and he added quickly, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

"You weren't either," she pointed out. "Aren't you supposed to leave me to die?" That put him at a loss, and he floundered for a moment before she continued, "Maybe you shouldn't be here."

He stared. "Are you going to tell me to join the _Jedi_?"

Ashi crossed her arms, looking offended. "Frack, no. I don't care. But maybe you shouldn't be a Sith, either. Just something to consider."

Mekel nodded slowly. "Maybe… maybe you're right," he agreed tentatively. "Thank you." He smiled, and Ashi nodded back evenly; but a moment later, her expression shifted to something more like a smirk.

"And you might want to make yourself elsewhere pretty soon," she added, as Carth began to stir. "Because Dustil Onasi? This is his dad."

Mekel looked horrified. "Dustil's at the entrance," she continued, "but he'll let you go, I think, if you tell him I saved you." She motioned him with a jerk of her head as Carth frowned slowly, waking. Mekel, intelligently, made himself scarce. The moment he was gone, Ashi punched Carth gently in the arm.

"Wake up," she said, all traces of sympathy gone. "You're fine."

His eyes flickered open. "Where's the old man?"

"Dead," said Ashi, matter-of-factly. "By the way, you suck at spying."

Carth frowned, sitting up. "He was torturing you!"

"And after you got yourself knocked out, I had to depend on Mekel to save me," she replied. "I'm lucky he grew a conscience."

Slowly, Carth stood; she offered him a hand as he got to his feet. "Really? This is the same Sith who tried to crush us with rocks?"

"You'd be amazed, the effects torture can have on people," she shrugged. "See a mask anywhere?"

They didn't have to search hard: the mask was, unsurprisingly, in the sarcophagus. Ashi lifted it from the wrapped corpse, but although she had predicted the rush she felt, it was no less overwhelming. Her fingers were tingling, and the metal was icy cold, but she couldn't put it down. The power she could feel in this simple object was… was… _delicious._

Without thinking, she lifted the mask, pressing it to her face.

The metal was cold against her skin, but not uncomfortable. More than anything, it felt disconcertingly familiar. With a jolt, she realized why—this was like the mask Revan wore, in her visions. A flood of horror rushed through her, and it took Ashi a moment to realize that it wasn't her own.

_Bastila?_ Ashi demanded. _Chill out, brat. It's a mask._

_Take it off! _Bastila shrieked. Ashi frowned. Somehow, she didn't want to. It fit well, and besides, she felt safer with it on. Suddenly she could understand, in a twisted sort of way, how Revan could wear a mask like this. She was invulnerable now, as with the sword, but not because she could fight: because she was emotionless, faceless. Human weakness was _beneath _her now that…

_Take the bloody mask _off_!_ Bastila shrieked. Ashi jerked visibly, before tearing it tit away from her face in a fit of sudden claustrophobia. Through the bond, she felt Bastila's deep relief. Carth glanced over in concern.

"All right, beautiful?" he asked, and she nodded quickly.

"I found the mask," she offered, holding it up.

"Oh. Great." He grinned, running a hand through his hair, and then turned to leave. Ashi followed, slightly puzzled. She could understand Bastila's reaction to some extent, but the amount of panic was too much, simply because she was trying on a Sith mask. And she'd felt even more, the moment she'd thought _Revan_…

There it was again: a little shudder from Bastila, through the Force. Ashi pounced on it, trying to pin it down into existence before the Jedi could hide it. _What's wrong with Revan?_ she demanded furiously, but then Bastila was gone, and no matter how hard Ashi asked, she refused to reply.

* * *

Uthar responded with his usual enthusiasm when she handed him the mask, informing her coldly that her final test would take place the following evening. Ashi, conversely, had trouble concealing her delight. Part of her mind was still puzzling over Bastila's issues with the word _Revan_, but the rest of her was cheerful. One more day, and she'd be off Korriban.

It might have been that precise cheerfulness that made her notice, the next day, how different Carth looked. She was slumped on her bed in her room, working on her lightsaber, while he sat against the wall, presumably deep in thought. What bothered her was that, out of the corner of her eyes, she saw him glance up at her every couple minutes, and then his face would fill with immediate misery.

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore. Just as he looked up again, she met his gaze, catching him in the act.

"Damn it, Carth," she exploded, "what's wrong?"

"What?" he asked innocently, and she rolled her eyes.

"You're moping."

He bristled. "I'm not _moping_!"

"Yes you are," she replied calmly. "Going to tell me why?"

He glanced away, at the floor, then his hands, then the wall—anywhere but her face. "You really want to know?" he asked, trying to buy time.

She shrugged. "I asked, didn't I?"

Carth ran a hand along his face, still not meeting her gaze. "Fine. Okay," he muttered, to fill the air as he worked out where to begin. In all honestly, there was no easy place. "You know about Telos, don't you?"

Ashi grimaced, shrugging, but she was listening fully now. She had seen Carth's memories, and she had heard Jordo in the cantina, but as far as she could remember, Carth had never really spoken to her about it. "Well… you know I had Dustil and my wife there."

Again she nodded, and he sighed. "I was just… just thinking about that."

Ashi was, uncharacteristically, at a loss. "Do you want to talk?" she offered hesitantly.

Carth laughed—it came out tired—and shrugged after a moment. "You want to know?" he asked doubtfully, but when she nodded he continued. "I just… don't talk about it a lot. But I was… I was thinking about my wife."

_Ah._ Ashi wondered uncertainly what to say. It was hard for her to picture Carth married, let alone a family person. "Your wife… I mean, you lost her in the bombing?" she asked, trying to phrase it delicately, and he nodded, looking reminiscent.

"I remember," he said slowly, "waking up to the first of their attacks penetrating our shields. My task force was… we were supposed to arrive, but we couldn't get there in time. I remember holding Morgana, and screaming for the medics…"

He broke off suddenly. Ashi had gone very pale. "They didn't come in time," he clarified gruffly.

"That's awful," she said finally. What was there to say, besides that?

Although maybe, she realized, it might help him to talk. There was nothing worse than keeping bad things to yourself. "What was she like? Your wife?" she asked.

Carth's jaw tightened, and his face grew stony. Ashi backtracked immediately. "I'm sorry," she said, "I didn't mean to pry or something…"

"No, it's all right." To her surprise, he half-smiled. "I'm just not used to telling people about this. She was…" He stopped, wondering how to describe Morgana. "She was fiery, and stubborn. Once she set her mind to something, she never backed down… a lot like you, in that respect." Ashi blushed lightly—she assumed that it was a compliment, but was it offhanded? Or was it a roundabout way of saying he cared about her?

_You're overanalyzing_, chastised her thoughts, and she quickly resumed listening to Carth.

"And she hated that I was in the fleet," he said, a reminiscent look on his face. "She was always telling me I spent too much time away from home. I was… I was going to resign, actually. Before Telos. But then…" He stopped, and then shrugged. "Well, then I had nothing to resign for."

Ashi nodded slowly. It wouldn't do to interrupt in the middle of this—Carth was never this open—but at the same time, he didn't look like that was it. "What else?" she pressed, and he smiled at her, a reluctant grin at her insightfulness.

"I was thinking about her before," he explained, "and I… " Carth stopped, taking a deep breath, and then blurted, "I can't remember what she looked like! I mean, I do remember what she was like, and her voice, the way she laughed… but I can't remember her face." He stopped, looking miserable, and then grimaced. "I'm sorry. This must be strange for you."

_What, talking about your dead wife? _No_, Carth, that's not weird at all. _But Ashi firmly squashed her instinctive sarcastic reply. He needed to get this off his chest.

"No, it's not weird," she said carefully. "You cared about her, Carth. I understand."

He looked relieved. "But… I just can't believe I forgot," he sighed. "I should be able to remember this kind of thing…"

"Sounds to me," Ashi offered, "like you remember what's important. That's what matters, right? And… she's not here anymore, Carth, but I think if she was…" She hesitated a moment. This was going out on a limb, to bring in the opinion someone she'd never known. "I don't think she'd want you to beat yourself up. I think she'd want to you to be happy."

He looked at her for a very long moment, his expression unreadable. Then, just as he opened his mouth to reply, Yuthura Ban materialized at the door.

"Ashi," she said sharply. "I hope you are prepared for your final test?"

Ashi's mouth dropped open, and she leapt to her feet, pocketing her lightsaber. "Frack," she hissed under her breath, before nodding quickly, "Yeah, yeah, I'm ready."

"Excellent," Yuthura replied. "Now, if you will come with me…"

Ashi obligingly followed, mouthing _Wish me luck_ to Carth as she left the room.

* * *

Naga Sadow's tomb went by in a blur.

Ashi was so on edge—practically vibrating with adrenaline—that the whole experience was lost, although the thick presence of the dark side in the tomb was enough to grant a hazy experience anyway. Afterwards, she would only remember the big things from the test: the desert wraids that she'd fought off single-handedly, the two terenteks—not one, but _two_! How the hell had they expected her to kill _two_?—that were thankfully not impervious to the massively powerful fire grenade. And, of course, the acid pool that she had been nervous to stand on, even after it froze over. Acid was like water, but more deadly, and that made it doubly bad in Ashi's book.

But then there was the tomb itself. The lightsaber was there in plain sight; obviously, the actual finding it wasn't part of the test. She took it in hand, grateful that it held no more influence than the other artifacts, and that she could fight it off now. The Star Map was right behind it. Carefully, ignoring the screech of metal that sounded like a dying cat, she activated it and took down the coordinates before turning to leave. Test over.

Except then there was that little double-double-cross she'd helped orchestrate. Ashi realized suddenly, as she exited the tomb, that she had a knack for making things complicated.

Both Uthar and Yuthura were waiting on the ex-acid river. Naturally, he spoke first. "So, you returned with the lightsaber in hand… as I knew you would."

"The Force has served you well," chimed in Yuthura. She was smirking.

"You took a great risk," Uthar continued. "You used your mind and your skill to achieve your ends—no peaceful meditation, no _pacifism_. You must take risks, you must _fight_, to meet your desires. This is the lesson we teach with this final test. Do you understand?"

Ashi met their smirks with one of her own, and nodded calmly. "I think so."

"Excellent. Now, let the final part of the test commence." Uthar's cold smile widened. "Now, you will learn the lesson of competition."

_Here it comes_, Ashi thought resignedly. Who should she side with? She had the option of either, and there was no particular advantage to a side—she'd weakened both of them. Hmm.

_Damn._ Uthar was nearly finished. "—to strike down one you are familiar with, for no reason other than to prove your superiority. Most students are pitted against another student, but you have a special treat." He turned to the violet Twi'lek and finished icily, "You will fight Yuthura, my own apprentice."

Yuthura looked unfazed, even as he added, "You have become too ambitious, Yuthura. It is time you must die."

"No," she replied smugly, "it is time for you to die, _master_. My pupil stands with me." She put her hands on her hips, daring him to argue.

"Sadly, you are mistaken," sighed Uthar "Your pupil is more ambitious than you realize. Isn't that so, young one?" he asked, turning to Ashi.

Ashi tilted her head to the side, visibly considering. "Actually, you're both scum," she said finally, grinning brightly. They both recoiled in shock, and she added, "But Uthar, you're scummier. I pick Yuthura."

Yuthura seemed so pleased that she conveniently forgot the scum comment. "Do you hear that, Uthar?" she hissed. "That is the sound of a new leader rising to replace you."

The old man's face contorted in fury. "So the time has come, has it?" he whispered. "You both wish to stand against a Sith Master and perish, do you? Then _so be it_!"

He pulled out his double-bladed lightsaber and sunk into a battle stance, eyes darting from Yuthura to Ashi he tried to pinpoint the more dangerous. He must have chosen Yuthura, for he spun at her, slashing with his blade and trying to choke her simultaneously. The woman resisted both and parried, but Ashi noticed that her violet face was pallid, bordering gray, and her lekku were limp and weak. Apparently, the poison had taken its toll on her.

Thankfully, the same was true for Uthar. He was weakened, and after a couple minutes of battle, his face went almost white. "No…" he hissed, as his legs began to shake and he stumbled. Ashi was reminded, almost with sympathy, of her crash off the stim on Korriban—but there was no Jolee to save Uthar. "No, this cannot…" protested the master, but Yuthura cut him off with a slash of her blade. The body fell to the ground, very old and frail-looking; his head rolled a few feet away, like a gruesome bowling ball.

Ashi turned her gaze away to Yuthura before the similes she invented made her sick. The smug grin hadn't vanished from the woman's ashen face. "Excellent," she said. "Uthar is vanquished, and a new order is brought to the academy."

Turning, she regarded Ashi, almost regretfully. "But while I do like you—truly—I'm not the type to share power with anyone else. Even you."

Ashi shook her head. Did Sith even know how predictable they were? "But I don't want any fracking power!" she protested.

"If only I could believe you." Yuthura shrugged. "Let's get this over with."

She lunged for Ashi, but it was a bad idea to begin with: she was still weak, and Ashi was strong. The new master struck out madly, and even more so as she realized she was outmatched; her gold eyes filled with the panic of one who has bitten off more than they can chew. Finally, her defense began to slip, and Ashi landed a slash on her stomach. The Twi'lek woman cried out and staggered, and Ashi kicked out, low and hard.

Yuthura slipped on the frozen ground and fell heavily, landing with her head barely inches from the flowing acid. Her lightsaber slipped from her sweaty hand and vanished with a splash into the green liquid. Ashi stopped, breathing hard, her glowing blade inches from Yuthura's heaving chest.

"Don't!" panted Yuthura desperately. "Please! I yield!"

Ashi stared at her for a long moment. _Wow… takes a lot of guts to surrender now,_ she thought dryly. She knew if it was her lying on the ground, Yuthura wouldn't hesitate, and no amount of begging would make any difference.

But… she wasn't like that. She was better than that. Now she could prove it.

Slowly and deliberately, she lowered her blade. "Asking for mercy? A Sith?" she asked, mock-surprised.

"I… I suppose I am. But something tells me… you are not like the other students. I don't know why that is."

She paused, and then, as she looked at Ashi, her eyes widened in realization. "I was right, wasn't I?" she gasped. "Back at the cantina. There _is_ something different about you, isn't there?"

Ashi hesitated, and then shrugged. "I'm not a Sith. I never was. Is that enough?"

"No… you weren't here to train," Yuthura nodded. "I should have realized that sooner. When I saw your mind, I could have seen more. I ignored that… but there is more, isn't there? You're not a Sith; I suppose I knew that, but…"

Her voice trailed off. "But what?" Ashi pressed after a pause.

"You reminded me of… myself. "Before I became a Sith. That… that is why I had to kill you," she added, slightly repentant. "I can't think about that."

"Maybe you should," offered Ashi softly. "What was that time like?"

Yuthura sighed deeply. "I was a Jedi when I was young. I never progressed beyond the rank of Padawan. The Jedi frustrated me, with calmness and peace. I had… I had a harsh childhood," she explained bitterly. "When I was young, I was a slave. I was full of anger. The Sith appealed to me through that— and I left the Jedi for them. But… maybe you are right. All the things I meant to do, the wrongs I wanted to right… I haven't done any of it. They all just became further and further from my mind."

_Force_, Ashi thought with exasperation. _What is it with Sith and epiphanies?_

"All I cared about is power… and myself. This isn't who I wanted to be." Yuthura paused, hesitating, and then sat up slowly. When Ashi made no move to stop her, she got shakily to her feet. "I don't know if I can go back, but my place isn't here. Thank you for showing me that."

Ashi had done nothing but watch as she got to her feet, her younger face unreadable, but Yuthura still attempted a faint smile. "You have a great destiny before you. Good luck, and may the Force se… may it be with you."

Ashi nodded slowly, and Yuthura turned and began to walk away. Her stride was full of purpose, and her head was held high. She looked happy. _I did that_, Ashi thought, and couldn't help a grin of pride. It faded as something else occurred to her.

"Wait," she called, and Yuthura stopped uncertainly. "You're not leaving me to break the news on my own, are you?"

* * *

Talking down the majority of the academy was a long and painful process. At first, Ashi had expected that she and Yuthura would be slaughtered before they could get a word out, when a wave of angry Sith charged them upon entering, but the students were surprisingly easy to influence. Ashi, Yuthura, Dustil, and Mekel combined was enough to finally convince most of them to leave, and the ones that didn't… well, there was no helping that.

It was a wonderfully strange sight in Dreshdae, seeing a wave of Sith—looking uncharacteristically happy and relaxed—make their way into the small colony. People who lived there were terrified to begin with, but the news quickly made its way around that the academy was closed. The Sith weren't Sith any more. Nearly everyone seemed glad about that, except the Czerka workers, who Ashi saw sulking along the streets. This, she considered a bonus.

All the citizens had been afraid of the Sith to some extent, and while they couldn't quite overcome their uneasiness, they were much less stiff and fearful around the students. There was a new air of life in the colony, and Ashi felt a kind of sheepish pride that she had been the catalyst for that.

The cantina that night was overrun with students and locals. The ex-Sith were all half-anxious, talking to each other about what they should do now, but the locals were celebrating. Ashi joined them, in an incredibly good mood—leaving Korriban, to her, was cause for celebration.

Most of her friends were enjoying the party too. Bastila and Juhani had opted not to go, but many of the crew saw it as a perk. Mission was especially having a good time; she'd missed this kind of atmosphere, and she'd also just met Dustil. The two somehow clicked right away—which might have been a result of Mission's natural likeability—but nonetheless, they were getting along very well. Ashi took note of that with a knowing grin.

But she was having fun too. There was no shortage of people, drinks, or noise, and she considered it perfect. It was a party, and people who were out to save the galaxy didn't get enough of those. Bastila disapproved of everything, especially the free-flowing drinks, but as far as Ashi was concerned, Bastila disapproved of most good things.

She had just pulled away from a Sith that was getting a little too inebriated when she caught sight of Canderous, Jolee, and Carth, all sitting at the same table. Canderous and Jolee were taking in the whole scene with smirks—apparently, dancing was beneath warriors of their caliber—but Carth seemed to be watching _her_ in particular. She felt a smile form on her face as an idea occurred to her.

"Hey, flyboy," she called, sauntering cheerfully over to their table. "Want to dance?"

Carth's eyes widened, and instinctively he shook his head, but Jolee rolled his eyes. "Go on, son," he said calmly. "You're not my age yet."

The pilot reddened, and it was enough of a yes for Ashi. She grabbed his hand with a smile, and pulled him out into the middle of the cantina. The music was loud and fast, and she grinned as Carth slowly seemed to gain a feel for it. She was a good dancer to begin with, but he could have been worse.

He was still looking half-puzzled, though. "Why do you want to dance with me?" he asked finally, glancing around. He looked vaguely self-conscious.

"Well, you looked bored," she replied, with a shrug. "And you were watching me, so I figured I could give you one dance." She smiled then, and he realized she had had an ulterior motive, namely a question. "Hey, come to think of it, flyboy, you've been watching me a hell of a lot lately. What's that all about?"

Carth felt himself flush, as he realized that, in fact, she was right. More than that, he'd been thinking about her a lot; he wondered if that was as obvious. "Oh," he muttered, at a loss for words. "I… uh, I hadn't thought you'd noticed." Internally, he kicked himself as soon as the words were out of his mouth.

"Really?" Her eyes sparkled in the dusky light. "Because if you were any more obvious, your eyes would fall out of your head."

_Oh_. "I'm not that bad, am I?" he asked sheepishly.

She smirked. "Not for a monkey-lizard, no."

Carth grinned back. "Damn it, woman," he replied, in mock-frustration, "if you keep hounding me, I'm going to put you over my knee and teach you a lesson."

Ashi's eyes widened and she laughed. "Uh-huh. I'd like to see you try."

The song changed. This one was slower. Ashi unconsciously slowed down to match the rhythm, and without meaning to, they both shifted closer. Her arms moved from his shoulder to around his neck.

"Just you wait," he responded. "You'll get yours."

"Haven't yet," Ashi replied, with a cheeky smile. "But with you out to get me, who knows." She paused, and then repeated curiously, "Really, though. What's with the staring?"

Carth turned slightly red, and his tone immediately became defensive. "Hey, hey. Look. I'm not staring all that much." He realized that that didn't sound much better when the smirk widened on Ashi's face, and he backpedaled. "At any rate, I wasn't ogling you, I've just been, uh, admiring you. Watching you in action."

And that didn't just refer to fighting: she had a way with people that was amazing too. "Your skill… I mean, you have natural talent that's incredible. Not that," he added quickly, "all I do is watch you or anything. I… uh, I mean, I didn't mean anything by it."

Ashi didn't look very convinced, but she nodded, and then smiled impishly. "Yeah? Got any other observations?" she wondered.

Carth mirrored her suggestive manner. "Maybe," he replied casually. "But I hope you don't mind if I keep those ones to myself." Ashi looked worryingly like she was forming a follow-up question, so he shifted topics.

"I will say one thing, though. We've come a long way with your help. Whether it's the Force, or fate, or smuggler's luck," he added with a grin, "I'm glad you're here." Her face broke into a large smile, as she looked genuinely pleased by the compliment. "We probably would never have made it this far without you," he continued. "I… I probably should have said this long before, instead of doubting you. I hope…" He paused, and then sighed, "I hope you can forgive me."

She frowned. "Uh, Carth. You already apologized once."

"And you accepted it, I know," he said, shrugging slowly. "But that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm forgiven. And I'd like to be."

He looked down at her, unsure what he wanted to see. She looked confused, a slight frown creasing her forehead. Confused, certainly—but not just that. The lights and shadows both played across her face, throwing shadows across her cheeks and glittering in her eyes. She looked… Carth hesitated to think it, but the thought would not be dispelled. She looked gorgeous.

They had somehow during the dance moved to a corner of the cantina where it was easier to talk, but even though they weren't exactly dancing any more, his hands were still on her hips and hers still around his neck. It could have been awkward, but it wasn't. "But how come do you need my forgiveness, anyway?" she finally asked. He paused a moment, but words sprung to mind, rushing out before he could rethink them.

"Because you're an impressive and beautiful woman," Carth said. "Because in some ways—good ways—you remind me a lot of my wife, and I'd like to make things right between us."

He immediately froze at his own honesty, and waited for Ashi to make some kind of teasing remark, but she didn't. She was looking at him with a bemused half-smile.

"You think I'm beautiful?" she asked slowly, and though there was the hint of a smirk in her tone, it was overshadowed by something that sounded like happiness.

He grinned, and shook his head slowly. There was no_ think_ about it. "You are," he replied, and Ashi felt an unfamiliar and unexpected joy as he said that. There was no doubting the sincerity in his voice.

She looked up at him, and slowly, without even realizing it, they began to move closer, his hands tightening around her waist. It felt like gravity, or maybe fate; Ashi realized with a jolt that they were going to kiss, but somehow, and despite all reason, she found herself wanting to. Her eyes began to flutter closed as she leant in, and he tilted his head down to hers. She remembered the sort-of kiss on Taris as very, _very_ good, and her heart was racing with anticipation as their lips brushed together…

"Oh my God!"

They jerked apart at the stunned exclamation, and found Mission looking at both of them with an expression halfway between a knowing smirk and blatant shock. Carth and Ashi went simultaneously red, and he pulled away. The girl was still staring.

"_Oh_, my _God_," she repeated, unable to think of anything else to say.

If she thought about it, Mission was the first person Ashi would have wanted to find them—miles better than Canderous or Jolee or, space forbid, _Bastila_—but right now, she had never been less glad to see someone. Ashi snuck in a glare at the girl and hissed in Twi'leki /Good timing./

Mission blushed, going light purple. /Well, sorr-y!/ she snapped, before reverting to Basic. "We… we were, you know, just going to leave, but if you guys are, uh, _busy_, then you can stay…" she offered uncertainly, voice trailing off. Carth shook his head.

"No, we're ready to go," he said, stepping away from Ashi—as he did, she gave Mission a look that made it clear this was all her fault. "I'll… I'll go get the ship ready," he muttered, hurrying off.

Ashi scowled. "I got cheated," she muttered—to no one in particular, but Mission crossed her arms defensively.

"Come on! Sure, yeah, _dancing._ Jeez, Ash, warn me next time before you go off kissing geezers. I'll send Bastila instead."

Ashi snickered at that idea, but then sighed. "I didn't get to kiss anyone, thanks to you. And he's not _that_ old."

"_Really?_ How old is he?"

"Thirty-eight."

"Um, ew. That's old, Ash."

Ashi smirked. "Yeah? How old is Dustil?" she replied, and Mission made a choking noise, lost for words for the first time in her life. As she spluttered, flushing purple, Ashi began to head out of the cantina, and the girl reluctantly followed.

"I don't _like _Dustil," she added sullenly, hurrying to match Ashi's stride as they made their way towards the docking bays.

"You're such a bad liar."

"I'm not the one making out in the corner," the girl pointed out.

"Making out?" Ashi scoffed. The nonchalance in her tone was professional, and few people could have perceived its falsity. "That was hardly a kiss. Although I assume your definition's a little warped, seeing as you've never kissed anyone."

"Never kissed anyone ten years older than me," Mission muttered tetchily. "'Specially not in the corners of cantinas."

"You make it sound worse than it is."

"Y'want me to make it sound _good_?"

Ashi glanced over, out of the corner of her eye; Mission was looking at her carefully, making sure she hadn't gone a step too far. Ashi allowed the girl a small grin, letting her off the hook. "When I'm making out in a corner with someone, Mish," she said calmly, her eyes sparkling with mischief, "it's going to be a lot more interesting than that."

Mission stuck out her tongue, as the moment called for it, before continuing. "I still want to know how come—" she began, but luckily for Ashi, that was the moment they reached the ship. She hurried on board, firmly ignoring the girl and her question.

* * *

**Feel free to review and scream at me. Mission's interruption might be cliche, but I couldn't help it. Third time lucky, I promise... ;)  
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**And speaking of reviews (what a segway...) I have a new oneshot up where I could really use some. It's the random idea to end all random ideas of mine, but it'd be great to know what you think**

**--skrybble  
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	17. Heat

**If I was smart, I would update at the _beginning _of the long weekend, rather than at the end (which is what I'm doing now, instead of finishing my homework). Oh well--I'm fairly sure it's been established that no one expects that kind of forethought from me. Here's a long chapter to make up for the end of the last one.**

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**Disclaimer: Not mine.  


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**Heat: warmth; intensity or extreme pressure**

_Improper behavior, absolutely not allowed… _

_Unfitting to a Jedi… _

_There is no emotion, there is peace; there is no passion…_

_Oh, will you _shut up_, _thought Ashi furiously, throwing her hands over her face. _It was one fracking kiss... space, no, we hardly even kissed. I didn't do anything wrong…_

But Bastila had no desire whatsoever to let Ashi off the hook. _You know perfectly well what you did,_ she snapped, and Ashi rolled her eyes. She herself was lying on her bunk, absolutely refusing to go out and face the pilot _or_ the Jedi. Bastila was in the cockpit, busy helping Carth fly, and any other day, the suspicious glares she was shooting him every other second would have been funny to Ashi.

_You are a Jedi_, said Bastila. _And there are rules for Jedi. You knew exactly what you were doing, and you knew that you shouldn't have._

Ashi groaned quietly. _Well, _maybe_ that just wasn't at the front of my mind right then, brat. Wouldn't that be understandable?_

_There are no excuses_, Bastila replied sternly.

_Look, it doesn't mean anything_, Ashi sighed. Now the irresistible spontaneity had worn off, she could consider it objectively. When all this was over, she didn't really want ties to a Republic soldier with a teenage kid, did she? And Carth was the kind of person who wouldn't want something brief. Oh, no. He'd want _commitment_.

Ashi shied away from the very thought. Smugglers lived for split-second impulses, mainly because they didn't count on their lives being as long as most people. The only consistent things she'd had in her life before this were her ship and her vibroblade, and she didn't even have either of those now.

Except it might be nice, to have _something_ consistent…

_Whoa, whoa, whoa. _She saw in an instant where her train of thought was going, and stopped it in a panic. All it had been was two people half-kissing, in the middle of a party where there'd been plenty of alcohol. Not like that was a surprise or anything.

But she knew, mainly from the absence of murderous headache, that she hadn't really had that much to drink, and neither had he—that assumption was based on her picture of Carth as generally one of the most responsible people she knew. So then whatever had almost happened had been a totally rational decision. He had known; he'd meant it.

Well, of course. He was Carth; he wouldn't even think about kissing her without being _serious_. And if there was anything she couldn't deal with, it was seriousness and its implications.

And speaking of _serious_… Ashi noticed Bastila's presence again, and scowled. _Go away,_ she thought, but then realized Bastila didn't want to yell at her. _We're going to Tatooine_, she said quickly.

Bastila recoiled, and Ashi frowned in confusion. _What? It's legit, brat, I've got a box to deliver._

There was genuine truth and bewilderment in her voice that Bastila must have been able to hear, but she still seemed edgy, anxious. In fact, it was similar to her feelings about the mask… or when Ashi thought _Revan_…

Bastila gave a delicate shudder, and Ashi jumped at it. _What is it with Revan? Why does that freak you out so—?_

With terrified speed, Bastila blocked her out. Ashi's question was cut off, and the Jedi took a deep breath that shuddered in her chest. She wasn't good enough at hiding her thoughts, and she knew it, but she still couldn't help the small flicker of worry that ran through her at that name. But it _wasn't_ irrational; she was sure of that. With the mask, back in Tulak Hord's tomb, Ashi had followed the logic precisely. Even if she didn't remember outright, Bastila could hardly even tell if any of their redemption had been permanent. Everything felt far too similar for her liking.

And now they were going to Tatooine. It really was the path that Revan had taken before; Kashyyyk and Korriban weren't just coincidence. Even if it was only a twist of fate, because of that box…

_There is no luck, no coincidence. There is the Force._

The thought occurred to Bastila like a lightning bolt. Was it fate, then, for Ashi to go in her old path? And would it be fate for her to remember?

That notion scared the girl even more.

Carth glanced over at her with concern—her hands on the edge of the dashboard had gone tight, knuckles whitening, and her face was even paler than usual. "Are you all right?" he asked slowly.

Bastila fought down the annoyance she felt with him—to tempt a _Jedi!_ Especially one who needed no tempting—and shook her head. "No…" she said faintly. "No, I think I'm going to go to bed." She got up, face still tense and drawn, and left the cockpit, not bothering to add a 'good night'. In a piece of small mercy, Ashi seemed to be asleep. At least she could think this over, this new concept of fate, without fear of her hearing.

But in the end, Bastila didn't really do any thinking. The moment she reached her bed, she remembered suddenly that she was only a young Jedi, and she was very tired; worry had kept her awake for the past couple nights. Without meaning to, she lay down on her small cot, and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

The trip to Tatooine was a long one, and gave Ashi plenty of time to think over the whole mess with Carth. In the end, she decided to take the easy route, and pretend nothing had ever happened. She adopted a cheerful nonchalance around him, and determinedly avoided talking to him one-on-one—it was easy enough, as he seemed to have made the same choice. She caught him looking at her sometimes still, but was happy to pretend she hadn't seen him. That made everything far easier.

There was one good thing that came of the trip. Over the days of travel, she began to form a tentative friendship with Dustil. He was awkwardly reverent to her for the first few days, and it took several repetitions of her 'no big deal' speech before he stopped that, but all in all he wasn't a bad kid. Maybe he didn't have Mission's instant openness, but he had a sense of humor, for a Sith—and he was _very_ good with a lightsaber, making for excellent sparring practice.

Consistently, Ashi maintained her optimism. Tatooine would be good. Anything was an improvement over Korriban, even deserts… even barren deserts, full of wraids and crazy masked Sand People…

_No. _Tatooine couldn't be worse than Korriban. It must be less complicated, anyway. As far as she knew there were few people, and even less Sith. It would be easy. The more she told herself that, the easier it gradually became to believe.

Of course, everything changed as soon as they arrived.

Ashi had high hopes when she stepped off the Ebon Hawk on her own, and they were immediately crushed. She had only just made her way to the docking rig's exit—feeling but refusing to acknowledge the heat; after all, the planet _had_ been _her_ choice—when an Aqualish approached her, stepping in her way.

/Hello, captain/ he gurgled. /Let's see… ah, yes. It appears the shipment has been delivered to your ship, as requested./

"What?" Ashi stared at him, and then over her shoulder, noticing for the first time that someone was carrying a large crate onto her ship.

He frowned, eyes skimming a clipboard before him. /This is docking bay 32, is it not?/ He glanced around, and then nodded to himself. /Yes, it is, and that's what I have on the paperwork. Everything seems to be in order./ He began to turn away, heaving a small sigh of relief. /Your problem now…/

Her eyes narrowed. "What's my problem?" she demanded, and the Aqualish looked surprised, obviously not have predicted her extensive knowledge of the language. He gulped. /I'm sorry, but everything seems to be correct. The shipment is in place and…/

"Whatever you put on my ship, I want it off. _Now._"

/I apologize/ he stammered, clutching his clipboard like a shield. /I'm sure we can correct this. There must have been…/

"Hey, boss!" interrupted a young human suddenly, jogging off the Ebon Hawk. "Boss, we got the crate on okay, but Neo dropped it and it broke. The gizka got out; do you think that's…"

The Aqualish looked exasperated, but Ashi had gone very pale. "I'm sorry," she murmured, after a moment. "Did you say… _gizka_?"

The boy nodded, appraising her with a puzzled frown. "Are you the captain of the ship?" he asked skeptically. "Can't see what you'd want with the furry little buggers. You know gizka, they multiply like…"

He stopped. Ashi had broken away from the conversation and was racing towards her beloved ship. Her footsteps clanged against the ramp as she sprinted on board, but stopped abruptly when she entered the main room. As she looked around, she sank to the ground in utter despair.

The room was overrun with the creatures, hopping around happily as if this was the best thing ever to ever happen to them in their furry little lives. Ashi only just managed to compose herself when the worker and the Aqualish came on board.

/I'm sure you understand/ said the Aqualish uncertainly, /that the gizka are yours now—we can't accept liability, and we certainly couldn't take them back./

Ashi closed her eyes, face forcibly calm, as with someone trying to fight down a headache. "Yes," she said finally. "Of course. Then the gizka are… they're… _mine_."

He looked relieved. /Wonderful. Enjoy/ he mumbled over his shoulder, making his way rapidly off the ship. Ashi gaped after him, still trying to process her day's sudden turn for the nightmarish.

Carth appeared in the doorway, narrowly avoiding one of their many new gizka as it bounced past him. "Should I ask?"

"No," Ashi said quietly, shaking her head. "No, you shouldn't."

He paused, obviously trying to obey, but apparently couldn't help adding, "_Gizka?_"

"_Don't_," she said flatly, and he nodded, turning away.

* * *

As the rest of the crew slowly returned, it was clear that everyone had had a bad day. Mission was the first to come back, cheeks flushed and lekku twitching with anger, and even the gizka couldn't cheer her up. After some questioning, Ashi managed to find out that she had run into her brother's ex.

Helpfully, Ashi had added, "I didn't know you had a brother." This sent Mission on a whole new spiel about her brother Griff, who apparently had been her parent until she was about twelve, at which point he and his girlfriend Lena had left Taris to get-rich-quick off-world. Ashi was skeptical about the idea of leaving Mission on her own, especially since this was pre-Zaalbar, but the girl was resolute in her defense of Griff. She was also happy to blame his untimely departure on Lena.

"And you got mad at her?" Ashi asked when she was done, imagining this was the sort of thing Mission would do.

"She started insulting Griff!" Mission burst out defensively, and then added, "And I might have gotten a little mad, I guess…"

Dustil snickered. "Sure. What did you call her again?" he prompted, nudging her, and Mission blushed.

"A, um… table-dancing, brother-stealing schutta of a cantina rat," she mumbled under her breath. Ashi burst out laughing.

"You don't do things halfway, do you?" she asked, a grin on her face. Mission shrugged.

"I was upset, okay? But the thing is, Ash…" She hesitated, and then blurted, "She said Griff's still on Tatooine, right? Working for Czerka. Only they broke up, so she didn't know for sure, but she thinks he's still here, and if it's not, like, out of the way, could we try to find him? He's my _brother_, Ash," she added beseechingly, hands clasped together.

Ashi looked stunned that Mission had to ask. "Of course we'll look for him," she agreed instantly. The girl's mouth dropped open and she beamed, squeezing her friend in a grateful hug. The next moment, however, Ashi heard a quiet voice in her head.

_I don't think that Mission's being fair_, said Dustil, through the Force. _Lena didn't really seem that bad—pretty nice, actually. I think that Mission's biased on part of her brother, even if she doesn't realize; he sounds like a jerk from what I could tell._

Ashi nodded imperceptibly. _Yeah,_ she replied. _Leaving a twelve-year-old on her own sounds like a stupid thing to do. But he's her only family. If he's here, I've got to try and find her._

_Fair enough_, shrugged Dustil, and turned to leave. Mission quickly followed, in a much better mood. Unfortunately, Mission and her brother was only the start. Everyone seemed to have had some kind of unfortunate reunion, or at the very least, a bad day. Canderous was acting gruffer than usual, and Ashi managed to wheedle out of him that he'd met an old member of his clan who'd challenged him to a battle for his honor. Jolee was simply mirroring the general mood and acting unhelpfully senile. And, perhaps worst of all, neither Zaalbar nor Juhani liked the heat—they were shedding, and small clumps of hair now littered the Ebon Hawk.

However, the biggest surprise was Bastila. Ashi hadn't thought she knew a single person outside Dantooine, but apparently she'd run into a friend of her mother's.

This was the strangest concept of all. Bastila having a mother, although obviously she had, seemed wrong, when Bastila was so incredibly serious and aloof. But the Jedi looked more edgy than Ashi had ever seen her as she paced around the Ebon Hawk.

Though both of them had been making an effort to silence their bond—mainly because of what they didn't want the other hearing—she could sense Bastila's nervous thoughts swirling around. The Jedi was concerned about seeing her mother, although not about her mother herself, and Ashi sensed a kind of pent-up resentment at the woman that Bastila had no image for. Interesting, indeed, though Ashi was careful as she spied; she had no intention of giving Bastila reason to poke through her head.

They all eventually retired to bed, ending a generally unsuccessful day, as the halls of the Hawk echoed with hopping gizka feet. Ashi needed something to cheer her up, and badly. However, as luck would have it, that _something_ was only a couple streets away, currently in sleep mode in the corner of a small, ramshackle mechanic's shop.

* * *

Their second day in Anchorhead dawned hot and dry. Somehow, Ashi wasn't very surprised, and had to remind herself that at the least, a lot of heat was better than a lot of water. Together, she, Bastila, Mission, and Carth departed the Ebon Hawk, making for the small colony.

It was immediately clear to them that they couldn't do anything without a hunting license, and Ashi, with badly concealed distaste, headed to the Czerka office. When they reached it, the first thing they found was a blonde girl, sitting behind a counter and looking bored as she inspected her nails. This wouldn't have been surprising at all, except for the fact that an angry Duros was shrieking at her.

/You won't get away with this, you Czerka puppet! I'm not going to let this drop! You can't simply murder an entire village!/

Ashi wondered if the Czerka girl understood Duros, because she certainly didn't look like it. /And/ continued the alien angrily, /don't tell me to take my concerns to the corporate kiosk! I know when I'm not wanted!/

_If he did know_, she mused dryly, _then you'd think he would have left by now_. The girl was beginning to look a little annoyed; apparently inspection of her nails required her full attention, and was difficult to accomplish with people screaming at her.

"What's going on?" Ashi asked calmly, sauntering towards the scene.

The Duros ignored her question. /I'm done talking to this office. They aren't interested in listening to me. I doubt they will even acknowledge I was here. Typical corporate evasion. That's what happens whey they own everything: no accountability. Don't even bother bringing it up./ Muttering under his breath, he stalked away.

"What was that all about?" asked Carth from behind her.

She shrugged. "I don't know," she replied as she approached the desk, taking the spot the Duros had occupied. "Hi," she said brightly. "Is this where I get a hunting license?"

The girl glanced up uninterestedly. "What? Oh, we're not, like, selling them any more," she shrugged. "Sorry."

Ashi rolled her eyes. _Once, just _once_, saving the galaxy couldn't be, oh, I don't know, _easy_?_ "Look, I get it, but I really…"

"If you have comments or concerns about Czerka Corporation company policy, you are welcome to speak with a Czerka Corporation representative," she rattled off. Ashi could tell from her tone of voice that it was a phrase she used a lot.

"Fine," she grumbled. "Who do I talk to?"

The girl paused, tilting her head, and then called, "Amanda! There's someone who wants a hunting license!"

There was a pause, and then an irritated-sounding voice snapped from a back room, "Tell them we don't sell them any more!"

"I _did_," the girl moaned despairingly, "but they won't go _away_."

There was a long, exasperated sigh, and then a new girl emerged from a back room. She was slightly older than the blonde behind the counter, with black hair pulled up in an austere topknot. Her lips, thinly outlined in red, were pursed in annoyance. "We don't sell the licenses any more," she said coldly to Ashi and her friends. "There are too many people running around outside Anchorhead as it is. I'm afraid you can't get one."

_But I _need _it_, Ashi almost whined. With difficulty, she swallowed the reply, and instead wheedled, "And there's absolutely no way to get one? Like, even if it's really important?"

Amanda appraised Ashi curiously for a moment, taking in the lightsaber hanging off her belt and her strong, sinewy figure. Then she smiled suddenly: a predatory, satisfied expression.

"Well," she said slowly, "there is one way for you to get one, I suppose. But there is a task we would need you to complete in exchange. It's similar to hunting."

Ashi felt a slight apprehension. Similar to hunting wasn't quite the same as hunting… namely because the prefix 'similar to' usually made it not about animals. "And what would I be hunting?"

"The Sand People are becoming a problem for Czerka on this planet. They attack our sandcrawlers and kill our miners. One particular tribe is the worst. It's as if their chieftain has decided to wage war against us. I would like their attacks…" She broke off, looking for a good word. "Terminated. In return for doing this, we'll grant you a hunting license and pay you a bounty for each gaffi stick you bring us later. You can have a bonus for the chieftain's."

Ashi frowned. "Gaffi sticks? Why not, like, their heads or something?" She asked that mainly to get a rise out of the Czerka girl, but Bastila stiffened too, and snapped, _Do you think you could try to be a little less repulsive?_

_I'm flattered_, Ashi replied flatly. The Czerka girl made a disgusted face.

"Which would you rather have dropped on your floor?" she asked, raising heavily penciled eyebrows. "Will you do it or not?"

Ashi nodded reluctantly. She didn't love the idea of killing the Sand People, but on the other hand, she had little choice right now. "Sure," she answered.

"Excellent." The Czerka girl grinned, and for a moment Ashi was reminded of the Sith Korriban. "Now, just to be sure we're clear, this is an enforceable contract. Czerka Corporation takes this very seriously. Mikki will get you a license," she said, gesturing offhandedly to the blonde girl.

"But we're not selling them!" objected Mikki, who evidently hadn't been paying attention.

Amanda's eyes narrowed sharply. "Get her a license," she said icily, her dark eyes flashing, and Mikki bit her lip and nodded quickly. Amanda turned and was about to say something else, but then a crash sounded in the back room.

"Idiot!" Amanda exclaimed furiously, spinning on her heel and hurrying back to the room. "You idiot! How hard is it to repair one of these?"

Ashi snickered, but then Mikki said tentatively, "Here's your license." She nodded gratefully, having new sympathy for this girl who worked with Amanda. About to leave, she turned, but Mission tugged on her arm.

"Ash," she hissed, "what about Griff?"

Ashi almost asked, "What about him?" but fortunately remembered in time. "Oh, right." Turning back to Mikki, she added casually, "Also, I was wondering if I could ask about one of your employees. His name is Griff."

Mikki looked surprised. "Griff _Vao_?" she exclaimed, and then realized her mistake. "I mean, um… what Griff? There's no one called Griff here…"

"Blue Twi'lek," Ashi continued. "Full of get-rich-quick plans and stuff… and…" She had reached the end of her knowledge of Mission's brother. "Did I mention he was blue?"

But that had been enough for Mikki. She leaned closer, lowering her voice. "You know him? Seriously, watch out. He seems really smooth and stuff, but he's a jerk." She paused, considering, oblivious to Mission's cheeks flushing violet in anger. "He _was_ kind of cute, though," she mused, tapping her chin. "It's too bad…"

"Too bad about what?" demanded Mission, her voice suddenly worried. Mikki tried to backpedal.

"Nothing… I mean, that he's not here anymore… but it's not like he's in trouble, probably…"

Ashi sighed. "I'll make this really simple. If you answer my questions, we'll leave, okay?" When Mikki nodded, she said slowly, "What happened with Griff Vao, and where is he now?"

"He used to work here in the office," said Mikki slowly, "and he would like, flirt with me and stuff, right, and I thought he was pretty cute. You know, not a lot of guys on Tatooine and stuff. But then, um… we were kind in the back room, and Amanda caught us…"

If Ashi had hoped Mikki's vagueness would shelter Mission, she'd hoped wrong. The Twi'leki girl was staring at the human one with a kind of sick horror and disbelief. There went her idolism for her brother.

"Amanda was really mad at us, and she got Griff sent out to the mining crew, but he got in a lot of trouble there, too, because they said he wasn't a good worker and stuff. Lazy, you know? Always complaining. I heard everyone got really pissed at him."

Mission found her voice with some effort. "Yeah," she said slowly, "yeah, I guess that sounds like Griff."

"Except they couldn't fire him 'cause there's not a lot of people, so they transferred him to sandcrawler guard duty," continued Mikki. Mission's face filled with horror. "But the sandcrawlers get attacked all the time, and there was a raid on the one he was guarding…" Her voice trailed off sadly.

Mission had gone horribly pale. "He's… he's not _dead_, is he?" she choked, her voice small and trembling.

Mikki shrugged helplessly. "I don't_ know_. They didn't find his body, if that's what you mean. Sometimes I think the Sand People take miners prisoner and stuff…" she added, at the look on the girl's face. "So he might not be dead. I guess."

Mission's expression hadn't changed, but she nodded slowly. "Uh-huh," she murmured. "Okay. Right."

She turned abruptly, heading stiffly for the door, and Ashi followed, conversation with Mikki abandoned once and for all. "Good luck finding him," called the girl uncertainly, as they left, before going back to her nails.

As soon as they were out of the office, Mission broke away from the group and sprinted away in the direction of the Ebon Hawk. Ashi instinctively thought to follow, but it slowly occurred to her to let Mission calm down on her own. Mikki had said Griff wasn't dead. That would sink in soon.

Just as she decided that, she heard a cleared throat behind her. The Duros stormed up to her, a look of disgust on his face.

/Ah, so you are the puppet Czerka Corporation has hired/ he sneered. /Tell me, how much are they paying you to slaughter a sentient race?/

Ashi frowned in puzzlement, but it faded quickly. After Kashyyyk, it wouldn't surprise her that Czerka's definition of sentient revolved around exactly how humanoid a species looked. "What do you mean?" she asked carefully, unwilling to lose her new license.

He looked surprised that she wasn't treating him like scum too. /The Sand People aren't animals/ he explained. /I've observed them. They're intelligent. I'm sure there must be a peaceful solution to this./ He stopped, and his face grew resentful. /Of course, there's no way to try to find one. Czerka authorizes everyone who leaves the city, and they want the people dead./

Ashi nodded. The alien had a valid point, although honestly, he had had her at 'it goes against what Czerka wants'. "Like, what kind of peaceful solution?"

/You need to find some way to communicate with them/ he said. /That's the big problem. They don't speak any language a regular translator can understand. There was a Jedi who tried to talk to them a few years ago./ He hesitated. /I… I think that ended in blood too./

_Right. And this is totally reassuring_, thought Ashi flatly to Bastila.

_I think he has an excellent point_, she replied adamantly. _Peaceful solutions should always be sought first._

_I think he has a point too_, answered Ashi calmly. _Screwing over Czerka is a lot more fun than working for them._ "And how am I supposed to talk to them, then?" she asked the Duros skeptically.

/Actually, there is one thing/ he said slowly. /You would need a real translation droid, not one of those regular protocol scrap heaps. They are rare, even on city worlds, but I heard something about an unusual droid in a shop in that direction./ He paused to point. /Yuka Laka, the mechanic, said it could speak a Sand Person dialect… although he would say rust was gold to sell things. But with that droid you could talk to them, though you'd need disguises to get into their enclave./

Ashi had worked this one out already. "And how am I supposed to make a peace offering when I'm breaking in wearing robes from the Sand People I killed?"

He paused for a moment, obviously having wondered this too. /Well... it would be difficult. But if you had the droid to talk to them, you might still be able to negotiate something/ he added hopefully.

"Sure," sighed Ashi. "Yeah, sure. I'll look into it."

His expression became irritated in a moment. /Of course/ he said with annoyance, /that's what Czerka always says, right before they shoot them. I don't know why I bother/ he snapped, spinning on his heel and storming away.

The most interesting thing that Ashi had picked up from the conversation had been about the remarkable droid. That might be cool to look into, whether or not she used it with the Sand People. However, Anchorhead was difficult to navigate. The building all looked the same and the streets were jostled around between sandy walls and doorways. Overall, it was too complicated for Ashi, and by the time they reached the cantina, she was ready to swallow her pride and ask directions.

Unfortunately, just as she began to enter, a Twi'leki man shoved out of the door and ran into her. She stumbled back, and he held out a hand, first to steady her and then to stop her. /I wouldn't go in there/ he cautioned through gritted teeth. /Honestly, is the name 'Helena' your human word for schutta?/

"What?" asked Ashi, head tilted in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

/That… that woman!/ he spat. /Walks in like she owns the fracking planet, bitching all over the place about everything she sees. Cleared the place out faster than a plague./

"Did you say Helena?" ventured Bastila suddenly. He nodded tersely, and her eyes widened.

_That's my mother!_ she thought to Ashi, although her surprised faded through the bond as she considered it.

Ashi was stunned. _He just called your mother a schutta? Space, Bastila, yell at him or something!_

But Bastila didn't. _I'm not surprised_, she said coldly. _His description of her is perfect._

Ashi registered that with shock, and gave Bastila a sideways look, before turning to the Twi'lek, "Do you think she's going to be there for a while?"

He looked incredulous. /You're _looking_ for her? You humans, I don't understand you at all…/ he muttered, stalking away. Ashi began to enter the cantina, but both Carth and Bastila grabbed her arms, yanking her back.

"Ashi, I don't want to see her!" exclaimed Bastila, at the same time Carth asked with confusion, "What was that?"

Ashi paused, trying to decide which was more important, before settling on Carth. "Bastila just ran into a guy who just ran into her mom," she explained briefly, "and _let_ him call her a schutta, and now she doesn't want to go meet her, even though she heard yesterday that her mom's looking for her."

Carth stared at Bastila. "You have to go see her!" he said immediately, and Ashi could tell he was thinking of Dustil. "She's your mother, Bastila! You owe it to her."

"I don't _owe_ her anything," said Bastila coldly. "We have nothing to say to each other."

"Just go!" Ashi wheedled. "Come _on_! She's your mom, brat. She…"

"She said she was sick, all right?" exclaimed Bastila furiously. "Her friend said she was dying!"

Both Ashi and Carth stared in blatant disbelief for a long moment. "And so you _don't_ think it's a good idea to go see her?" Ashi demanded finally. "If she's dying, of course you have to see her!"

But Bastila shook her head. "I doubt she is really ill," she said icily. "Mother often used this sort of thing to get herself an advantage. I don't think I'll be playing in with any of her games."

Ashi gazed at her for a moment, and then grabbed her arm, dragging her through the door. "That's it," she said firmly. "Your family life is obviously screwed, and I blame the Jedi. Now your mom says she's dying, you are _damn_ well going to talk to her. Clear?"

Bastila looked so terrified she could do nothing but nod.

Ashi smiled. "Good. Which one is she?"

Slowly, Bastila pointed to an older woman at the bar, who looked slightly pale but had a stern sort of air about her. There was also, Ashi noticed with surprise, a lot of sadness… maybe loss. Things obviously weren't going her way.

"Go," Ashi hissed, shoving Bastila pointedly, and the young Jedi nervously approached her mother.

"Hello," she stuttered, and the woman glanced up, giving her a piercing look.

"What?" she snapped. "Who are you?"

Ashi bit down a smirk at the sight of Bastila tongue-tied. _Savior, save thyself_. "It's me, mother," the girl mumbled. "Don't you recognize me?"

However innocent her reply had sounded, it had been the wrong thing to say. Her mother's face lit with anger. "What do you expect?" she demanded. "Eighteen years, and not so much as a picture, Bastila! Do you know how long I've been trying to find you?"

Bastila didn't seem to hear the last line about her mother looking for her. "You knew as well as I that communication was forbidden after I became a Jedi. Now, what is this about? Where is Father?"

"Your father," said Helena, enunciating slowly and icily, "is _dead_. You haven't heard?" But then her face softened a little bit, as she added, "That was part of the reason I was looking for you."

That struck a chord with Bastila. Her eyes widened and her pale face grew even whiter. "Dead?" she echoed numbly. "What… what happened?" Then, her pale face filled with hatred. "What did you do to him?"

Helena looked shocked as she suddenly turned to Ashi. "Well, isn't this a lovely reunion. Two minutes, and already she's flinging insults at me! Tell me—you're one of her friends—do you treat your mother like this?"

Ashi bit her lip. "My mother's dead, actually." To be honest, she hardly remembered her—they'd been separated on Deralia, shortly before Ashi became the only person in her family to escape the ravaged planet.

"Oh." Helena stopped, momentarily apologetic. "I'm sorry. But I'll be joining her soon enough, I suppose."

"Ah. Yes." Bastila's eyes narrowed skeptically. "You're _dying_. Tell me, are you actually sick, or is this melodrama for my benefit?"

Helena put a hand over her heart. "Such sweet things you say. Maybe I can _explain _before we start arguing?"

"Fine," Bastila spat. "Why don't you start by telling me what you got Father into that got him killed?"

Ashi shook her head, disgusted. Bastila had annoyed her before, but right now, it was reminding her a hell of a lot of Dustil and Carth. Though watching them argue had been fun momentarily, it stopped being good as it became more and more clear how screwed up their relationship was. Carefully, she sidled away from the two women, and instead decided to finish up some business. A quick glance around the small cantina, and a Hutt caught her eye: Motta.

She sauntered up to him, and caught his eye. A moment of implicit understanding passed between the two as they sized each other up. She felt him scrutinizing her suspiciously, seeing what he could read of this newcomer in her face. If he wasn't sure what to make of her, he didn't show it, although he didn't actually show any emotion when he spoke.

/Who are you, Jedi?/ he asked brusquely. /What do you want? Go dig a mine, human—I'm not interested./

She raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms. "Listen a little bit, Motta, and I think you will be." She paused, letting the words hang in the dry, hot air, and then continued, "You wanted a box?"

His massive eyes widened, slitted pupils stretching. /_That_ box. Yeah, I know it. Supposed to be here a month ago. You take a detour or something?/

To his disappointment, Ashi was unfazed. "Something like that."

/Ah, well. Never mind./ He paused, and then smiled. /You look in the box, human?/ he inquired knowingly.

_Damn. You just had to ask, didn't you?_ "No," she answered. _Not yet._

He chuckled. /Smart woman. Live longer that way./

_Oh, space. _That did it. If it was something lethal, then she needed to see it for herself. /You be wanting payment now, right?/ Motta continued. /Two thousand credits, yes? This was the agreement?/

She let her face grow offended. "You kidding me? That box is fracking dangerous, and I only get two thousand? I think I deserve more than that." She smirked momentarily as she added, "If it's too much, of course, then don't worry about it. I'll keep the box. I'm sure someone else is willing to pay for what it's worth."

Motta's eyes widened, but a moment later he laughed again, rather incredulously. /I'm impressed, human. Most people don't argue with Hutts./

"But I'm not most people, am I?"

/Fine/ he said evenly. /Three thousand, because I like you. You come back some time, yes?/

"We'll see," Ashi replied with a shrug. "Maybe if you relocate." And then, though she tried—she really did—her curiosity got the better of her, and she added suddenly, "So, you can pick it up in two days."

He frowned. /And not now? Why?/

"My reasons are my own," she said coolly. "You've waited a month. What's two days more?"

/All right/ he agreed. /You can have two days, but you only get two thousand, five hundred./

Was it worth it? _Yes!_ screamed her mind, and she slowly nodded. "Sure. Docking bay thirty-two, the Ebon Hawk."

/Excellent./ He flicked the tip of his tail contentedly, and then added /What's your name, human?/

"Ashi Lucas," she said with a grin, nodding in belated greeting. "Freelance. And I have no problem with dangerous cargo."

He laughed. /I'll remember you, human/ he said, and then Ashi walked away. Carth raised his eyebrows as she approached—though the conversation had been one-sided for him, he still seemed reluctantly impressed.

Bastila and her mother were still "talking". Ashi could hardly find anything good to say: they apparently hadn't progressed in their conversation at all, although if nothing else, at least Ashi hadn't missed anything. Bastila's mother was busy describing her late husband's death, trying to escape her daughter's immediate blame.

"—By a Krayt dragon! One of the guides fled the battle and saw him killed!"

"I see," said Bastila slowly, but Ashi knew she had only conceded because she couldn't think of a way to blame her mother. "So what do you want from me? Credits?"

"Don't be insulting!" Helena snapped, and Ashi began to side with her. It was obvious, at least to her and Carth, that Bastila's coldness hurt the old woman. "I want you to use those senses of yours. Your father had a holocron that he took with him on his expedition, and I would like you to find it and bring it back to me."

"Why? So you can sell it?"

"I want something to remember him by!" snapped the old woman. "I am _dying_, Bastila Shan! Is that one thing too much to ask? Oh, wait," she exclaimed, "of course it is! You can't be _bothered!_"

The entire cantina had gone quiet. Everyone was staring at Bastila and her mother as they stared each other down. Ashi could sense Bastila's mortification and indecision. "We're busy on an important mission," she breathed. "I don't think we'll have time. Ask my companions, if you doubt me."

Carth backed away immediately, and every eye turned suddenly to Ashi. She gave Bastila a long, reproachful look, taking time to savor the irony of their reversed roles, and then said, "I'm sure we can help."

"_Thank_ you," Helena interjected pointedly. "There you go, Bastila. Just find the holocron, and then you never have to worry about me again."

Bastila's ashy face was drawn with frustration. "Fine," she said tightly. "We will _look_ for the holocron _if we have time_. I can't promise more than that."

"I believe he was headed north," said Helena shortly. "Check along that route. Do please hurry, _dear_."

Bastila nodded tersely, and then seized Ashi and all but dragged her out of the utterly silent cantina.

"Am I to take it that did _not_ go well?" muttered Ashi dryly, but Bastila glared so ferociously she shut up.

* * *

The Jedi was so upset that she headed back to the Ebon Hawk right away. Ashi and Carth wandered around Anchorhead for a while, eventually splitting up to look for the droid shop, both amazed it could be so well hidden in such a small place. As luck would have it, Ashi found it a moment later, nestled around a corner and busy looking abandoned.

"Hello?" she called uncertainly, walking into the dusty building.

/What is this?/ asked someone in a strange tongue. A shadowy shape dislodged itself from the back wall and became an Ithorian as it stepped closer. /A new customer? Perhaps bringing off-world money to Yuka Laka?/

It seemed Yuka Laka could use some off-world money. His store was a dump. "Maybe," said Ashi slowly. "Depends on whether I like your translator droid."

/Ah./ The Ithorian nodded, smiling. /The HK-47 model. Excellent choice. This is a fine translator droid. It claims even to understand the Sand People dialect. It also has armor mounts—combat ready, I believe. And every function I've tested has performed to perfect standard. Well/ he added quietly, /all I could find./

"All you could find?" she frowned. "Why couldn't you find them all?"

/The unit has been somewhat… uncooperative. They get that way when they go too long without a memory wipe/ he explained quickly. /Perhaps you find it amusing. It is somewhat… eccentric, but very stable./

"Uh-huh." Ashi nodded slowly, but she was sold. If he had to describe the droid as 'eccentric', it must be worth having. "I'll take a look." He nodded agreeably, and she approached the rust-red droid.

"HK-47?"

"Greeting: hello, potential customer!" he exclaimed brightly. Ashi quickly waved Yuka Laka away. "Query: do you plan to purchase me?"

"I'm considering it. Are you worth it? What do you do?"

He straightened. "Supposition: the fool Ithorian will have given you a basic explanation, but I shall tell you what I know. Clarification: I am fully functional in many different areas. I am programmed for combat, and I am fluent in a number of dialects. I am also capable in many other areas. However…" He lowered his voice. "I would not mention them in the mechanic's presence. It might cause him to raise my price."

Ashi grinned. "I'll talk to him."

HK nodded. As she turned back to the Ithorian, he added, "Recommendation: the Ithorian meatbag might be persuaded to lower the price through forceful persuasion."

Ashi nodded. She was going to use persuasion… but she didn't think it was the kind he meant. "How much is he?"

/Five thousand./

"Five thousand?" she demanded. "You're kidding. He's not worth that much, even new."

HK made an offended noise behind her. She chose to ignore it.

/Oh, of course it's too high. But some people bite right away. Very well, four thousand./

Ashi shook her head. "Actually," she said slowly, "he's really not worth much. In fact, you don't like him at all. You'll sell him to me for a thousand. You're desperate to get rid of him."

Her wrist and fingers twitched slightly, as if grabbing and molding an invisible object. The weak-minded Ithorian was helpless. /Yes!/ he exclaimed. /Just take him! Take him free! You can have him!/

_Oops._ Ashi thought she might have overdone it, but wasn't going to argue. "You're very kind. Come on, HK."

"Suggestion: ought the fool mechanic to remove the restraining bolt, master?"

"Right." Ashi nodded to the Ithorian, and he hastened to take the bolt off. HK straightened as it came away, like it was a weight off his shoulders. Ashi motioned him, and he nodded eagerly.

"Query: shall I accompany you now, master? Shall I kill something for you?"

To her credit, Ashi hid her blatant shock well. _Well, there goes nonviolence_, she thought, perhaps with less regret than she should have had. "Maybe later," she said slowly, and he bowed his head in acceptance.

"Concurrence: very well, master. I shall await the time when I may do so. My circuits are sparking in anticipation."

"That's nice," said Ashi, motioning him through the door. The baking heat enveloped them the moment they passed through the doorway, but Ashi hardly noticed. The moment the door closed behind them, she demanded, "_What_ kind of droid did you say you are?"

"Explanation," he said, drawing himself up straighter. "I am an assassin droid. I am highly functional in the areas of both combat and intellect."

But Ashi had only heard one word. "_Assassin?_" she echoed, eyebrows rising so high they almost disappeared into her hair.

"Caution: shh, master! Such a function in a droid is highly illegal."

"I'll fracking _bet. _Don't worry," she added conspiratorially, "I won't tell anyone."

He nodded. "Statement: good, for I would hate to be turned into spare scrap, master. That would be such a waste of my genius engineering."

"Oh, everyone's just going to love you," Ashi murmured gleefully. "Come on, HK. I have some people I want you to meet."

* * *

It seemed everyone was on the Ebon Hawk when Ashi and HK arrived. There was perfect silence as she walked calmly in with her new purchase; unfortunately, the first words out of HK's mouth were "Query: might I blast these meatbags?"

Ashi eventually managed to stop laughing over 'meatbag', but the first impressions had already been made. Bastila, predictably, hated him. "Why," she demanded, "are you drawn to violence like this? It is a despicable quality in a Jedi…"

"HK," Ashi interrupted, "you're allowed to blast this meatbag." HK raised his blaster with surprising speed, and Bastila paled. Ashi held up a hand. "Just kidding," she said quickly, obviously caught off guard by his efficiency. "Just… I don't know, follow her around and threaten her a little."

And he did just that. Needless to say, Ashi wasn't popular for the next few days, but Mission and Dustil managed to forgive her, when she had HK stop threatening them, and Carth seemed to have developed endless patience with anything she did. It would have been nice, if she weren't trying so hard to pretend nothing had happened on Korriban. Though HK bothered almost everyone else, Jolee also didn't seem to mind him—that, or he simply didn't care about Ashi's new toy.

In the end, it was Carth and Bastila who came with her when she went to see the hunting lodge and get her license verified, both to get away from HK. The entire process was proving almost more trouble than it was worth. Tatooine might be, as Canderous said, one big rock with lots of little rocks sticking off, but company protocol and restriction were well in place, and no amount of arguing with the gate guard would get Ashi through until Czerka was satisfied.

Needless to say, she was in a bad mood as she got her new license checked, but she decided to make the most of it. In truth, she had no idea what to expect in the Dune Sea except maybe sand, and was hoping some of the hunters could let her know. The people in there were definitely both ends of the spectrum—there were Gammoreans in one corner, but also a few people who were glad to help her out. Then, she met Tanis Venn.

He sidled up to Ashi, trying to be subtle, and her eyes darted to him. "Hi?" she offered, a question rather than a greeting.

"Oh, hello there," he drawled calmly, pretending he had just seen her. "Haven't seen you around here before, sweetheart. You new here? I could, ah, _show you around_."

"I'm fine," she said quickly. "I just had a couple questions, but I bet you're really busy and…"

"Hey, hey," he interrupted. "Don't be like that. I'm sure I can make time for you."

Ashi ignored the suggestive tone in his voice, and then shrugged inwardly. He must know _something_. "I'm looking for experts. You seem…" She paused, and then compromised, "Well, you probably know more than me."

He grinned. "Oh, sure, darling, whatever Tanis Venn can do for you. You know, very few human females come to Tatooine…" His eyes had definitely left her face, and were now drifting shamelessly all over her body.

Beside her, Carth stiffened. "Hey!" he snapped, fists clenching. "You talk to her with a little respect in your voice, or you'll end this conversation minus a few teeth—got it?"

Tanis held up his hands immediately. "Hey, hey, calm down. No offense was meant. Didn't know she was yours," he added. Carth didn't stop scowling at him, practically snarling, and Ashi rolled her eyes. It was like having a pet Kath hound.

"I'm not _his_," she said, with enough firmness to tell Carth to stop acting like she was. "But _you_," she added to Tanis, "can stop staring anyway."

She tried to walk away, but he grabbed her wrist. "Hey, wait," he said with a smirk, having taken Ashi 'not being Carth's' as her being an option again. She noticed, as she yanked her hand away, that staying quiet seemed to be causing Carth physical pain by now. "I just thought of something. If I said you had a great body, would—"

"I'd slap you," interrupted Ashi flatly. Tanis's eyes widened, and he unconsciously took a step back.

"Right," he muttered, before turning and walking away hurriedly. Ashi was the one smiling now, looking pleased with herself.

"Come on, guys," she said, motioning to them and turning for the door. She spoke calmly, but in her eyes were glimmers of both excitement and well-hidden apprehension. "The Dune Sea awaits."

* * *

**R&r, as always. Still looking for a beta--PM me if you're interested...**


	18. Desert

**First of all, huge thanks to all the reviewers! Nothing makes me want to keep writing more. Second, the chapter. I won't be winning any awards for original names, but hopefully some more dramatic irony and perverts getting beaten up will make up for it...**

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**Disclaimer: Don't own KOTOR... (sigh)  


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**Desert: a very hot area containing little but sand**

If Ashi was going to be honest, she had seen few things that were more frightening than this in her life.

It had been easy hurrying back to find HK, and a breeze getting through the gate to the desert. And now, Ashi was positively frozen. Neither Kashyyyk nor Korriban were as bad as this—not even the Taris sewers could compete. Wide, empty golden sand stretched as far as the eye could see, and then a few thousand miles after that. She understood in a moment why Czerka hated this planet. Anchorhead immediately felt very small. It was all too easy to imagine getting her distance off, and walking back to the colony only not to be able to find it. All of it was the same. This was a place you could wander forever and a day, and never find your way back.

"Ashi? You all right?" asked Carth, tapping her shoulder lightly, and jerking off her panicked train of thought. She nodded tersely. It was just a desert… a wide, empty desert that she might never get out of…

"I'm fine," she said quickly, and scanned the sands for anything that wasn't more desert. Instinctively, her gaze flickered to a small, dark spot somewhere far away. She had no perception of distance here. "What's that?" she asked, pointing.

Carth squinted. "Sandcrawler."

She nodded. "We're going there." It was as good a place to start as any, and going anywhere was better than walking out into nowhere.

As they neared the massive Czerka machine, Ashi made out several figures that were hurrying around it. HK, apparently, had seen them too. "Query: master, might I be allowed to blast these meatbags?" he asked hopefully.

Ashi frowned. "Depends who they are," she answered, just as one of them noticed her.

"Hey!" he called. "Oh, thank space. You're the new crew?"

"No," Ashi replied helpfully, walking over. "Who are you? You guys look like hell."

"We're one of the Czerka mining crews," he said bitterly, ignoring her remark. "And we need help. Our sandcrawler broke down, and we're being attacked."

"By… who?" Carth asked doubtfully, looking around at the empty landscape.

"Those damn Sand People!" exclaimed the miner, waving his hands theatrically. "They're camouflaged, so you don't see them until they're already on you!" Somehow, he missed their skeptical looks. "We've lost half our crew to them just today…" He broke off, and his eyes widened. "Frack! They're back again!"

And suddenly Ashi saw them—floods of figures in hooded robes that matched the desert, swarming towards them. Her heart leapt to her throat in horror.

"Query: master…?" HK began, and she cut him off.

"You can kill these ones," she said, and he nodded gleefully, beginning to charge his weapons.

"Statement: excellent. I shall make use of my new flamethrower. Meatbags are always most amusing to fry."

Carth gave Ashi a look that clearly meant 'and _what_ were you thinking when you bought him?' but she ignored it, drawing her lightsaber. The Sand People were advancing steadily, and somehow she didn't think they were in a talking mood.

The first line of attack proved that. Small, round objects suddenly flew through the air toward them. Ashi realized what they were with a gasp, and shouted out, "Shield!" Bastila understood suddenly, and reacted sharply, throwing up her hands. Blue light and golden fire clashed in midair, dazzling the onlookers momentarily. Ashi had, stupidly, been looking right at the explosion, and as it faded, she realized with horror she couldn't see. _Heal_, she thought furiously, but her Force was drained from the huge shield.

And then blaster fire rang out—two different ones. _Thank space for my friends_, she thought gratefully, as she heard HK cry, "Exclamation: take that, sand meatbags!" Sparing Ashi a glance, he called, "Reassurance: do not worry, master, I will kill the meatbags while your weak eyes recover."

"My eyes aren't weak!" Ashi snapped, blinking desperately, and heard Carth laugh. "Shut up, flyboy," she added, "you'd be in lots of little pieces if it wasn't for me."

He paused, and she dared to hope she'd actually shut him up, but then he called, "Uh, Ashi? If you can see, now would be a good time to start doing it."

Just as he said it, she felt a spark of Force fill her. Hungrily she reached out and snatched it, using it to heal her vision. The next moment, she gasped in horror. The Sand People were seconds away, despite HK and Carth keeping all they could back. She drew her lightsaber and launched herself at the wave of tan.

If she intimidated them at all, they didn't show it—obviously, they had seen Jedi before. Several pulled out staffs, and Ashi found with surprise that she couldn't cut through them. They had some kind of coating that was solid to her lightsaber blade. Fortunately, their bodies weren't quite as impervious to her attacks, and she dispatched them almost as fast at they attacked.

_Un_fortunately, the key word in that was _almost_. Despite Ashi and all her friends fighting with everything they had, the Sand People kept coming endlessly. This was an attack party, and they meant business. The other miners weren't holding up. _Typical Czerka_, Ashi thought exasperatedly, but she did have to do something. She wasn't going to get her friends killed because of some Czerka idiots.

"Bastila!" she shouted, and somehow the Jedi heard her. Ashi didn't have time to explain, and so just _moved_. Bending her knees, she leapt up, and used the Force to send herself flying. Leaning back, she caught hold of a ladder rung partway up the sandcrawler, and swung herself over to a ledge. Bastila nodded and followed suit.

The Sand People looked caught off guard as two of their attackers suddenly developed the ability to fly, but decided to use it as a chance to eliminate Carth and HK. As the two had seen Ashi and Bastila, it didn't surprise them quite as much as it could have when they were simultaneously jerked up in the air. "What the hell?" Carth exclaimed, and HK cried, "Objection: but master! I had them!" but they landing near Ashi and Bastila all the same, safe from the Sand People and now with an advantage.

Carth and HK continued to make good use of their blasters, although HK was sorely disappointed of being deprived of the use of his flamethrower. Bastila turned to the Force, dispatching the Sand People with determinedly light-sided attacks. As for Ashi, she tossed grenades with ease, and when she ran out, she switched to Bastila's method.

It was going well. The attack party had almost been completely demolished—there were less than fifteen warriors left—and then one of the Sand People suddenly got smart.

A combination of Force and energy shields protected Ashi and her friends from most of the ranged attacks, but there was one thing they hadn't anticipated. One of the Sand People must have had some grenades left, and Ashi was caught off guard. Without any warning, a huge explosion shattered the metal edge under her feet. She was falling before she realized what had happened. Gravity disappeared…

Ashi cried out, and then swore even more loudly, as she hit the ground. Nope, gravity was still very real, and just as unhelpful as ever. Her leg was twisted horribly underneath her—broken, from the way it hurt—and one of her arms felt similar. She stared up at the Sand People, and it occurred to her that they looked much scarier as she sat defenseless on the ground. At the least, there were more than enough to make sure she never got out of the desert.

One lunged.

She couldn't have said what it was, but something inside her snapped. She wasn't going to die here, she was _not_ going to let them kill her—she was going to fracking fight _back_…

* * *

…_All around her were legions of faceless figures with the same armor. Were they supposed to frighten her? Because if they were, they were doing a terrible job. She wasn't scared at all. Her every nerve was tingling with adrenaline, and her heart was pounding as she spun and dodged. _This_ was what being a Jedi was about, the saviors of the galaxy in action._ In fact_, she mused, as she dispatched three Mandalorians in one swing, _someone really should have a holocam or something_. This was what everyone needed to see: the rebel army, saving their sorry asses._

_She could feel her allies through the Force, strong blue auras amidst the sea of Mandalorian gray. They were widely spread, but that was only because they didn't need help, and not because they were stretched for numbers. They had plenty of followers. And why not? Who wouldn't want to be a part of this?_

_It was such a perfect moment that, of course, something would go wrong._

_Pressure was suddenly shoved through her spine, choking her breath in her throat. Coldness, radiating out from her back, spread through her body. She looked down and had to blink hard to comprehend it. A metal blade ran through her chest, right next to her racing heart. _

_The pain came suddenly, fire licking her ribs from the inside. She coughed weakly, incredulously, and blood splattered the front of her blue Knight robes. _

_No._

_No, she wasn't dead. It was simply not possible. She wasn't stabbed; she wasn't dying. She would wake up in a moment, and this would be all a nightmare, and Alek would be there, to reassure her that it was all—_

"_NO!"_

_Alek's voice came as a double assault—a faint call, and a horrified cry that echoed in her mind through their bond. "No… no, Red, no!" he cried, and she knew he was racing towards her, but he would never get there in time. Numbness filled her, as the prospect of death suddenly became reality. Sure, she'd been hurt in battle before, but never alone, never like this. She had never been so totally helpless. And now she would die for it, die fighting to save the galaxy: a martyr, giving her life bravely for her cause. _

No!_ Damn it, no, she didn't want to die… _she didn't want to die!

_And then everything went hazy, a curtain of red slipping over her vision. The blade slid from her chest with a horrible jerk, and the warrior stepped away. Apparently, he took her for dead too. But then she was reaching out through the Force, and there was so much life around her, and surely she could take some to save her own…?_

_Dark tendrils of power exploded from her, grabbing hold of anyone near her like a gigantic octopus. Figures around her were engulfed in fire and then collapsed to the ground, drained of life. And all the while, her burning wound stopped gushing blood all over her, and healed over, and she felt her shredded lung suddenly knit itself back together, and she was all right… no, better… she was all-powerful… no one could stop her now…_

_Very suddenly, she was herself again, and she stumbled as she switched abruptly from Force to physical vision. But there were arms around her, and she opened her eyes and looked around, and saw Alek and the many Mandalorian corpses…_

"_Red," said Alek slowly, incredulously, "what did you _do_?"_

_She was breathing hard, and her face was more horrified than him, because a part of her was simply happy to be alive. And she would have killed the Mandalorians anyway. This was easier, wasn't it?_

Wasn't _it?_

"_I… I don't know," she lied…

* * *

_

It seemed, to Ashi's stunned friends, as if the entire scene before them had erupted into fire. One moment, she was on the ground, facing death with a grimace, and the next a glowing silhouette, bathed in violent red. One by one, Sand People jerked and spasmed, and then dropped like sick, humanoid flies. And then Ashi was on her feet, and for a moment her eyes flashed silver, nearly a feline yellow…

And then it was gone, all gone, and she swayed on the spot, before crumpling to her knees and then to the sand.

HK was the first to break the silence. "Observation: I did not know my master was so powerful."

Bastila swallowed hard. "That… she drained their life," she murmured. "That's a dark side power."

Carth was staring. A moment ago, he'd seen Ashi about to die, for the millionth time; now he was seeing her as a killer. It was so easy, in this instant, to picture her as a dark Jedi, her lightsaber just a couple shades off violet…

The next moment, he realized how terrible he was to be thinking that, on so many levels. Ashi was lying on the sand of the Dune Sea, one of dozens of bodies, and she was as still as all the rest. He rushed across to the ladder rungs and raced down them, taking them two or three at a time. Then, as soon as he was close enough not to break his legs like she had, he jumped off, and hurried over to her. She lay face down, and he rolled her over, to find that she was trembling.

"No," she whispered, her voice nearly inaudible, "no, I don't know, I didn't mean to…"

"Ashi?" he asked, shaking her gently. "Ashi, wake up, it's all right."

"No…" she mumbled. "No, I didn't… _NO_!" Very suddenly, her eyes snapped open. "_What?_" she asked anxiously.

He sighed in relief. "Are you all right?"

"The hell I am," she muttered. "Didn't I just break my legs?"

He scrutinized her closely. "You seem fine."

"Am I?" Ashi glanced down at her leg, poking it experimentally. There was a surprising lack of pain. "I'm better," she said, puzzled, and then noticed Carth's expression: half surprised and half disturbed. Something was wrong.

_Bastila_, she asked quietly, _what just happened?_ She had a nagging feeling that her vision, like all the others, was somehow relevant to whatever had happened between the fall and the waking up.

Bastila was silent for a long moment. Finally she asked coldly, _How often do you use dark Force powers?_

Ashi's eyes widened in shock. _What did I do?_

Bastila had reached the bottom of the ladder by now, closely followed by HK, who was muttering violent threats to the Sand People. Lips pressed tightly together, the young Jedi paced closer to Ashi. _What do you think you did? You killed all of them. You drained their life!_

Ashi stiffened; her breathing quickened as she looked around. There had been a lot of Sand People standing around her… but none of them were standing now._ All of them? But… Bastila, no!_ Ashi protested._ I didn't mean to, I didn't know!_

The Jedi made no reply, and Ashi got slowly up off the sand. Carth offered her a hand, but she didn't even see it. Bastila was within speaking distance now. "How often," the girl hissed, "do you do that? Where did you learn that? Korriban?"

"No!" Ashi exclaimed. "I didn't know I knew that, Bastila, I don't know where I learned it! It was just… there."

For a moment, she thought about telling Bastila. She thought about explaining all about Alek and Red and the visions she kept having, visions that always corresponded perfectly with the galaxy and with her abilities. That, at least, might convince her that Ashi wasn't secretly going dark—it was much too elaborate a lie for something like that. And maybe Bastila even knew something about it. Ashi loathed the idea of asking her for help, but she couldn't help thinking that if anyone might know, it would be Vrook-in-training.

But she didn't. Something stopped her, and Ashi just shook her head mutely.

Bastila stared at her. Her face was going very white, as if something terrifying had just occurred to her. And because Bastila wasn't half as good a liar as Ashi, she couldn't hide the fragment of thought that passed through the bond.

…_Coming back…_

Ashi swallowed. "What's wrong, brat?" she asked nervously.

Bastila took a deep, shaky breath. "You are never to use that again," she said sharply. "Never." After glaring at Ashi one more time, she hissed, "We are leaving." She began to stalk off towards Anchorhead. Carth hesitated, and HK blatantly ignored her, but Ashi motioned them on.

"She's right. We should go," she murmured. HK looked skeptical.

"Query: are you all right, master? Shall we go kill something to cheer ourselves up?"

Ashi couldn't help a shaky laugh. "Tomorrow, HK," she promised. "We've had enough killing for today."

Delighted with the prospect of bloodshed the next day, HK began to walk with a new spring in his step. But Bastila continued to stalk across the sand disapprovingly, and Carth trudged along behind, still looking edgy.

Ashi didn't seem to see any of them. Her eyes were unfocused; she was deep in thought as they made their way back to Anchorhead. The main thought running through her mind was how alike she and Red—whoever Red was—must have been. They were both reluctant Jedi, both good fighters… both with dark sides they didn't understand. It was too much similarity for Ashi, in two people who were apparently completely unrelated; and it made her uneasy, although she could never have said quite how.

* * *

There was nothing to do at the Ebon Hawk when thy arrived. Zaalbar and Juhani had somehow managed to short out the air conditioning through combined desperation, and Mission was working grudgingly to fix it, aided by T3. Everyone was in a bad mood, and the general atmosphere wasn't aided by the invasion of the hairballs with legs. It was all Ashi could do to keep from going crazy, amidst the erratic bounce of gizka feet.

Naturally, her mind began to wander in an effort to get away, and her thoughts turned to Motta the Hutt and his job for her. She was giving him the box the next day, and so far she hadn't opened it. That was good. She would never have to risk some horrible and needless fate… she could just live a long, full life without ever knowing what had been in the box… although no doubt it was one-of a kind, something she would never see again…

_Damn it_! Surely she didn't need something to do _this_ badly.

Considering that for a moment, she realized that yes, in fact, she did. Sighing resignedly, she stood and hurried to the cargo hold. The box was sitting there, gray stone, covered in strange markings and runes. She paused, just to make sure that it was too late not to open it.

It was.

She approached it cautiously, and then lifted the lid of the box before she could reconsider. Her head spun, as the dimensions around her inverted themselves. For the smallest instant—a split fraction of a second—she was seeing_ into_ the universe. Color and lightning and eons of impossible space filled her mind, and she realized for the first time that the box was so much more than it seemed to be. Then there was a horrible sucking sensation, and she felt a strange draining in her stomach… except then she had no stomach—in fact, she had no physical form at all…

The scene unfolding was one only a Force-sensitive could appreciate, but any that had been watching would have seen a light, fractured through with rainbows, be drawn from Ashi's eyes and, glowing like fire, sucked into the box. Then the lid snapped closed, and her body hit the floor with a thud, empty.

About ten minutes later, Zaalbar entered the cargo hold, trying to surreptitiously scarf some of their food without anyone noticing. A horrified bark filled the ship as he nearly tripped over Ashi's still body.

After the entire crew was in the hold, all talking at once, it took a long while to establish that it wasn't a corpse. Jolee was the one who was calmest. Slowly, he knelt beside Ashi's body, holding his fingers to her wrist and closing his eyes. A slight frown creased his wrinkled forehead. They got the impression that he wasn't only checking for a pulse.

At the end of a long moment, he stood. "I can't sense her."

Horror, almost tangible, filled the hold. "She's dead?" demanded Carth.

Jolee snorted. "She's not _dead_," he replied scornfully. "I didn't say that. Physically, she's fine. But I can't sense an aura. Her body is perfect, but there's no life in it. It's just her body. And," he continued, having noticed the slightly tilted box lid, "I think_ she's_ in there."

The idea of Ashi's soul being trapped in a box was enough to prompt a whole new run of skepticism, but the fact remained that Jolee had the most probable solution. That put them at a complete loss as to what to do, but finally, they moved her body to the medbay, and after some debate, the box as well. It didn't seem good for her soul to be too far from her body, especially if it tried to return to where it should be.

Most of them migrated nervously away after she was moved. Only Jolee and Carth stayed, and eventually, even the old man left, saying with a shrug that there was nothing he could do. Carth stayed, sitting next to the cot where Ashi lay. Every so often, his eyes brushed over her face, and he no longer bothered to act like he wasn't doing it, or that it didn't mean anything.

His mind was in turmoil. What if she never woke up, if she stayed comatose like this forever? He had seen her like this too many times: on Taris, before they'd really met; on Dantooine, after the kinrath attack… it seemed to always be Ashi that was lying there, near-dead. He should have realized that. Why had he been so stupid, putting off talking to her? He should have told her before that he cared about her, and screw the Jedi and their rules. He _should_ have kissed her when he had the chance.

What would he do, if she died and he'd never told her? He depended on her too much for her not to wake up. And then why did she have to be so damn curious? Hadn't she been told not to open that fracking box in the first place?

As he sat by her, and time ticked past, marked only by her erratic, shallow little breaths, he began to make promises, desperate wishes. If she woke up, he'd tell her that he cared about her. He'd make sure she knew that everything he'd said on Korriban, he'd meant. And most of all, he'd protect her. He thought back to Tanis in the hunting lodge, and then the Sand People battle in the Dune Sea. She didn't want his protection when he gave it, but he was never there to protect her when she did need him.

Well, that would all change. He promised himself that… if she would only wake _up_…

Carth glanced over at the box. Had it been a person, he would have sworn that it was smirking at him. And then, just as he glanced back at Ashi, the lid grated open.

Again, it was a scene only a Force-sensitive could see. There was a moment of strange, ethereal beauty as her soul spilled out from the box and drew itself up like a living creature. It was a mass of light, echoing with a thousand colors, and it seemed to take in the room for a moment before it found Ashi. Then it poured over and _into_ her, sinking through her skin; when it touched, it from a consistency of mist to something far less tangible before it engulfed her.

Carth saw none of this. What he did see was Ashi jerk unexpectedly, and then her eyelids flickered gently.

His hand was in hers, and her grip on it tightened instinctively as she opened her eyes and looked around. "What…?" she asked, as her puzzled gaze found him. Mission holding her hand would have been sort of endearing. Carth holding her hand made her slightly nervous. _Space… what happened when I was out?_

Carth, oblivious to her confusion, felt a stunned smile spread over his face. Ashi lifted a hand to her face, touching it gently. "Cool. I'm me," she observed.

He leaned back, sighing in relief as he shook his head. "I suppose there's no point in asking if you're all right."

"I'm fine," she shrugged, sitting up slowly. Noticing Carth's doubtful look, she insisted, "_Really_. Are you okay?" she asked cautiously. His expression looked unfamiliar: some kind of strong emotion was burning in his eyes. Not quite anger…

He looked at her incredulously. "We thought you were _dead_."

"I'm harder to kill than _that_," she snorted. "Come on. It's a box."

But, adamantly, he shook his head. "Ashi, I thought you were never going to wake up," he repeated.

"And?" she prompted impatiently.

"And I was thinking…" Carth hesitated. This might very well be a point of no return. But it was worth it. "I was thinking we need to talk."

She stiffened, eyes widening fractionally. _Damn, here it comes._ "Talk about what?" she asked carefully.

But he looked at her with a frown, and Ashi knew he could tell that she had understood. _No_, she thought with desperation, _no, I don't want to _talk_ about anything!_ "Okay," she said, feeling no guilt about lying, "but… can we talk later? I'm still kind of dizzy and stuff." She lifted one hand to her forehead and used the other one to pretend to steady herself on the wall.

He pulled back a little, looking disappointed, but nodded. "Of course," he nodded. "You should probably rest." Ashi obligingly lay down, swallowing her relief. He left the medbay, and she closed her eyes. It hadn't been a total lie about the dizziness, and she _was_ tired…

* * *

By the time the second sun rose on Tatooine the next day, Ashi, Bastila, and Carth were all heading to the Dune Sea in the wake of a gleefully impatient HK—he was holding Ashi to her promise of things to kill. They had only just bypassed the gate, however, before they saw something very strange. A woman, tall and vaguely pretty, had out a pair of long-distance goggles, and was staring through them at five dark specks out in the desert. Every so often she would stop and snicker. It was far too interesting, in Ashi's opinion, to ignore.

"Hi, I'm Ashi," she said, approaching the woman. "What's so funny?"

"Marlena," the woman replied. "And, revenge." She seemed to savor the word. Ashi frowned.

"Revenge? On who?"

The woman smirked. "My husband. Tanis Venn; perhaps you've met him?"

Ashi did a double take. "He's _married_?" she demanded. When the woman looked surprised, and Ashi added, "I met him at the hunting lodge. And, uh… I don't know if you know this, but do you know what your husband does down there?"

Marlena was suddenly staring at Ashi with murderous disgust. "Oh, I see," she said darkly. "You're one of his little playthings from the hunting lodge, aren't you? I know your type, you filthy little schutta."

Ashi's mouth dropped open, and her fists clenched. Bastila winced, but HK looked like he was enjoying the scene. "I'm not _anyone's_ plaything," Ashi hissed, her voice dangerously soft. "And, see, I wouldn't ever be Tanis's _any_thing, because I've got two things. They're called _class_ and _self-respect_." She stopped, and then finished with a vicious smirk, "By the way, I wouldn't talk. I'm pretty sure _you're_ the one who married him."

Marlena stared at her for a long moment, and then echoed, "You're not with my husband?"

Ashi made a face.

"Oh." Tanis's wife nodded slowly. "I… I apologize. But then if you know Tanis, I'm sure you…"

Ashi's eyes flashed. "Oh, I understand. Completely." Curiously, she wondered, "But what exactly is the revenge?"

"I set a little trap," Marlena smirked. "Our anniversary gift, actually. He'll get out fine, as long as he's smart enough." She paused, and then added vindictively, "But he's not smart."

Carth frowned. "Sounds like she's planning to kill him," he pointed out.

Marlena's smile widened, becoming almost scary. "Oh, I'm done _planning_. And I'm getting out of here. I'm tired of cleaning up his stupid messes. I'm getting off-world, and I could care less what happens to him. If he lives, he can try to get by on his own. Although I doubt he'll be very good at it." She stopped, a dreamy smile on her face, and had to blink hard to focus again. "Anyway, if you see him, tell him his wife Marlena says hello." She gave Ashi one final smile, before darting past and into Anchorhead.

From Ashi's grin—rather more amused than it should have been—she seemed to find Marlena's plan very funny. "Come on," she instructed, starting out across the dunes. "I have a message to pass on."

* * *

After about a half hour of walking, they were close enough to discern Tanis. What was more, he could see them. "Hello?" he called hopefully. "A little help? I seem to be, eh, doomed."

They jogged closer; Carth and Ashi were fighting smirks. "Hey!" Tanis called as he saw her. "Hey, you're the girl from the hunting lodge! Talk about answered prayers." Somehow, he missed Carth's filthy look.

"Oh, right," Ashi said. A smug, feline sort of smile twitched across her lips. "Tanis. By the way, Marlena says hi."

He rolled his eyes. "I'll bet she does. You see what she did? She's fixed my droids to do her dirty work."

"Commentary: one would hope the female meatbag is better at repairs that Yuka Laka," HK threw in. "I would like very much to crush his neck, master."

"I triggered some kind of trap," Tanis continued resentfully, ignoring HK when everyone else did. "She probably figured I wouldn't be smart enough to get out of it." He hesitated, and then sheepishly admitted, "She was right."

Ashi cocked her head to the side. "You want me to fix your droids and save you ass?" Tanis nodded eagerly, and she turned to her friends. "Guys? Verdict?"

"I say leave him," said Bastila unexpectedly.

Tanis frowned. "You know, you're pretty heartless for such a pretty lady."

"Actually, I take it back," snapped the Jedi. "Let's go congratulate his wife."

_Whoa_, thought Ashi, her opinion of Bastila rising with every word. Apparently even the brat had a dark side. "Carth?"

Carth looked torn between obvious disgust with Tanis and his do-gooder side. "I think we should save him," he finally said. "It's not right to leave anyone here."

HK looked appalled. "Offer: I could blast the meatbag now and save you the trouble, master."

Tanis frowned. "What's with the droid? Marlena get to you, too?"

"Statement: negative. I just don't like organic meatbags!" After a pause, HK amended, "Except the master, of course. Ha, ha." He chuckled nervously. Everyone stared at him for a long moment. Finally Ashi broke the awkward silence.

"I'll help you," she said. "But only because I think that you should have to work a little." Tanis nodded; it seemed he had only heard "I'll help." They all waited anxiously while Ashi fiddled with the rogue droids, but one by one they stopped jerking wildly and deactivated. Finally, the last one turned off, and Tanis smiled, surprisingly sincere.

"That was… unpleasant. Thanks for helping me out." Then his face slipped into its characteristic leer. "And now, my dear lady, the matter of your reward. Might, ah, _earthly pleasures_ suffice?"

Ashi gave him a look.

"Eh… perhaps not," Tanis muttered, suddenly reconsidering. "But my life is worth something to me, even if it's not to anyone else. Here." He dug in his pocket, and pulled out a large handful of credits. "Thanks again."

Ashi had a worryingly bright smile on her face as she stepped forward. "Thanks," she said, accepting the money. "And I've got something for you." Tanis's eyes widened hopefully, and Ashi smirked. "Little present from me and Marlena," she explained, and then she pulled back a fist and punched him between the eyes.

The crack echoed through the desert air, inciting flinches from all the humans nearby. HK simply seemed entertained. Tanis staggered back, clutching his face; a thin stream of red wormed its way between his fingers. "Frack!" he spat, stunned, and then turned and ran, droids bobbing calmly after him.

Carth stared at Ashi as she dusted off her hands calmly. "Remind me not to make you mad," he muttered.

"You need a reminder after that?" she challenged, grinning.

Bastila looked horrified. "_That_ was why you saved him?" she demanded.

"_So_ worth it," Ashi replied, watching the still-running figure of Tanis with amusement.

HK was not as amused as Ashi. Annoyed at the fact that the only bloodshed so far had been a broken nose, he sulked along behind them as they trekked through the dunes. Fortunately for him, the Sand People were as indiscriminatingly violent as ever, and they felled several groups of those, as well as desert wraids, better known as mouths with legs. Both groups came with benefits after being killed—the Sand People all wore their robes, and the wraids had skull plates that were apparently valuable, though Ashi saw none of the appeal. Finally, there had been a group of Gammoreans that attempted an ambush; however, they hadn't anticipated HK, and it backfired on them.

All in all, it had been a good day. Moods were high by the time the suns began to sink low in the sky, and Ashi and her friends were on their way back to Anchorhead.

They had only boarded the Ebon Hawk when it suddenly occurred to Ashi that now was probably a perfect time for Carth to want to talk. In fact—now that she noticed—he was glancing over at her in a worrying kind of way. Time for a subtle escape. Spinning around, she offered something about going for a walk, and left the docking bay quickly.

She did feel a little guilty, but this was easier all around. It was much better to just avoid him than reject him to his face—especially because she wasn't actually opposed to anything but the commitment. At the start of her mission, back on Taris, she'd planned to get off the planet, dump everyone she didn't like, and pick up smuggling where she left off. Now, that plan seemed more and more impossible every day, but she could still try not to make it even harder to accomplish.

She ducked through into Anchorhead, and took off through a side street. Her pace was brisk and sure; she took sharp turns and back ways. No one was going to find her. She needed to think—and that meant being undisturbed.

Finally, she came to the perfect place. It was a small vista, jutting from a larger building, which overlooked the desert. It did look like a sea now, rising and falling in endless waves of gold, and the setting suns glittered off it like light from water. For all her misgivings about the desert itself, Ashi thought that the view, at least, was beautiful.

She settled down, legs stretched out in front of her, and closed her eyes.

It could have been hours or seconds she sat there, for all the progress she made about what to do. All she knew was it certainly hadn't been long enough, before she felt an aura approaching.

* * *

**Cliffhangers are altogether too tempting for their own good. Don't worry, though--the next chapter is the one every Carth/Rev person is waiting for. Review for a quote and a little more foreshadowing...**


	19. Alone

**I know it's been forever (well, over two weeks, and for someone with as short an attention span as I have...) Apologies all round, since I know it was a horrible cliffhanger I left you with. Still, this got rewritten at least three times, so I have very little guilt.**

**Without further ado, I guess...

* * *

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**Disclaimer: I don't own KotOR (but I own Ashi)  


* * *

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**Alone: isolated; solitary; lonesome**

Carth turned a corner, and then saw her, on the edge of a sandstone building, looking out over the Dune Sea. One of the suns was setting, leaving her silhouetted against the gold and purple twilight, her beloved red jacket lying on the ground next to her. He couldn't see her face, but she rested back on her hands, perfectly still, and the overall impression was that she looked incredibly peaceful. An unconscious grin tugged at the corners of his lips. For a moment he wondered if—space forbid—if she was meditating, but then she laughed.

"I can tell you're watching me, you know," Ashi said. Thought she spoke lightly, her mind was racing. Why in space did he have to find her? _How _had he found her?

There was a pause, and then he walked over, sitting down next to her. They sat in silence, both looking out over the Dune Sea, until Carth's eyes slowly drifted over to her. She looked beautiful, he thought unexpectedly. The first sun had set; the second was low in the sky, leaving a glow of pinks and violets in the air touched with shadows of indigo. Her face was lit by the sunset, and her hair stirred lightly in a gentle breeze, as she gazed over at him, head tilted a little to the side. Then, slow and leisurely, a near-feline smirk lit across her face.

"Monkey-lizard," she said, breaking the stillness.

"You didn't say you minded it," he pointed out.

"That's true," she replied, and the silence stretched out again. Ashi's thoughts were racing. _Don't flirt_, she reminded herself furiously. _Just be platonic! _She knew he wanted to talk now. In fact, he couldn't make it more obvious: every moment he seemed to open his mouth, and then think better of it and close it. It would have been funny, any other time, but watching him was almost physically painful by now.

"You have something to say," she said finally, unable to bear the quiet any longer.

He glanced over, amused. "Oh, you can tell, can you?"

Ashi smirked. "Well, your mouth keeps opening and closing, flyboy. That's what we in the business would call 'a clue'."

"Yeah? Well, listen, beautiful," he replied, leaning back and fixing her with a look, "I don't need to take this abuse from you. I get enough female Jedi bashing from Bastila, thanks very much."

Surprisingly, this only widened the grin further. "Oh, so there's something between you and Bastila, then, is there?" she asked, her voice carefully calm even as she tried to hold in a smile. He did a double take, staring at her incredulously, and his jaw dropped so far that he was in danger of swallowing a bantha or two.

"_What?_" he managed finally, stunned.

Ashi frowned at him reprovingly. "Don't lie," she teased with pleasure. "I've seen the way you look at her."

"I don't know, beautiful," Carth objected. "I think you'd have to be pretty damn crazy to try anything like that."

"Oh, so someone would have to be crazy to like the brat?" Ashi's eyes gleamed. "I think that I'll have to tell her that. You know, see how the 'there is no emotion' line works in real-world applications."

Carth flinched exaggeratedly. "Oh, no. I'd have to shoot you down first, and I'm not kidding." He laughed, and then sighed deeply. "Honestly, gorgeous, you and that mind of yours that loves to jump to conclusions."

"I think it's more that I love making you feel awkward," she offered brightly. "And I'm so damn good at it, too." He rolled his eyes, and Ashi grinned. "Oh, come on, flyboy, you know you love the attention."

He shrugged. "Half the time, I could probably get the same kind of attention from a blaster rifle."

"I can do a hell of a lot that a blaster rifle can't," she pointed out, and then cringed inwardly. _Stop it, stop flirting… frack, of all the times _not_ to be a celibate…_

Carth's eyebrows flew, and he smirked at her, meeting her challenging gaze head-on. "I'd like to see that," he replied, and behind her back, she crossed her fingers.

But he looked away, eyes flying to trace the horizon. In the not-quite-evening, the golden sands threw back fading sunlight, illuminating the colony with a soft glow. "Or would I?" he wondered, taking a breath and letting it out abruptly. "Damn it, Ashi, you've got my head on backwards."

"I have that effect on people."

"I've noticed," he murmured. For a moment, silence rushed in to claim the scene, but then he suddenly turned to her, an unreadable look on his face. Ashi resisted the urge to gulp. "But, actually, I… uh, I have to talk to you about something serious," Carth said. "Really serious." He paused. Had it been anyone else, she would have called his tone hesitant, but hesitancy was simply not something he did. Anyway, he sounded far too determined to be hesitant. "Is this a good time?"

Her mind raced as she looked over at him, a thousand possibilities flying through her head. He looked so solemn, and she was almost afraid to find out what '_it_' was, but…

But there _was_ a 'but'. She was too stupid to say no, and so she replied softly, "Yeah, sure."

"All right." Carth hesitated a moment, presumably organizing his thoughts, before suddenly blurting, "I'm… I'm concerned about you. I've been keeping these thoughts to myself, mostly, but I think it's time I say something."

Ashi quirked an eyebrow, sparing him a wry glance before remembering not to make eye contact. "You? Keeping secrets? That's a shocker."

He didn't laugh, though, and after a moment, she couldn't help it. It was better to have something to fill the excruciating quiet. Ashi looked over at him, her frustrated look demanding an answer.

"Carth, what's this about?"

He looked taken aback—nervous, even—as he dropped his gaze to the ground. "It's about you," he admitted, quickly adding, "I'm worried about what might happen to you. You have a lot of courage, obviously, and the fact you've stayed so strong throughout all this…" He raised his hands vaguely, referring to the entire mission. "It's nothing short of amazing. But there's even more danger ahead. I think that you might be setting yourself up for a fall. You're definitely going to become a target, Ashi."

Ashi could hear worry in his voice, along with something deeper, an undercurrent to his tone that she had never heard anyone speak to her with before. She bit her lip, but said nothing.

"If I'm going to find some purpose beyond taking revenge on Saul, then it's going to have to be in protecting you," he said slowly, and the undertone was a little surer now, definitely there. "I don't know why," said Carth, although he didn't sound uncertain, "but I think that some terrible fate is waiting for you."

She suppressed an automatic eye roll—would it kill him to think positive?—as he continued. "I think that the Jedi Council knows it, too. And… I don't want that fate to come to pass." There was definite emotion in his voice now. Ashi struggled to keep a casual tone to her voice as she nudged the topic, trying to steer him away. Her heart was drumming against her ribs, knowing what was coming even as she tried to deny it.

"You think the Jedi are going to throw me to the wolves? Although," she conceded, with a grin, "it might not surprise me. I didn't think Vrook liked me very much."

Carth shrugged, and shook his head. "Don't chalk it up to my paranoia just yet. It's just… something isn't right," he said adamantly. He had the good grace to look sheepish as he added, "And I tried to blame it on you before. But I… I think that the Jedi didn't tell us everything."

Suddenly, as she watched, his eyes seemed almost to ignite. She could see emotion that was nearly frightening, but very, very alluring, burning in them. It was intense, but she found herself unable to look away as he said, "If I'm going to live past Saul—"

"Which you are," Ashi interjected right away. Relationship or not, she refused to let him say 'if'.

"Okay, okay," he said quickly. "But if… or _when_ I do, Ashi, then I need you to as well." Slowly, gently, he reached up a hand, and brushed her hair away from her face, leaving his fingers resting against her cheek. She resisted the urge to melt under his touch with difficulty—it was only the indignity of _melting_ that made her stop. "Let me protect you… from the Sith, and from yourself. _Please_, Ashi."

_Damn it, Carth…_ why did he have to be so fracking _persistent_? Anyone else would have taken a hint by now, but _no_. She'd gotten _Carth_, who insisted on being this perfect, even when all common sense said they should clash explosively; Carth, who didn't seem to realize what deflecting was, or maybe just didn't care. "I don't need protecting," she objected. "And… and why do you care? Why does this matter so much to you?"

"Because…" he began, and a sharp anguish flitted through his eyes. "I never had the chance to save my wife and son, Ashi. Because I didn't stop Saul when I could have. Because I finally have the chance to do it right." The emotion was back, stronger than ever, and Ashi felt herself unable to look away or reply, a new experience. "You're an amazing person, Ashi, and you make me think, maybe… that I might have some purpose beyond revenge."

He broke the eye contact, looking like he felt like he had said too much. "I don't know whether it means anything to you, but it does to me." When he looked back at her, his eyes were determined again. "Let me protect you," he said. "Please, let me try."

She looked away. What would she do, she reminded herself, if this went somewhere after their mission was over? She didn't want to be tied down. She wanted to be a smuggler again, and somehow she doubted that would work out—if _anything_ she planned, or rather, didn't, would work out with Carth around.

But, on the other hand, she was finding it very hard to summon any kind of concern about that right now…

"I don't want you to get hurt protecting me," she said, trying to sound firm, but he could hear that it wasn't a no, and that was enough. He lifted her chin softly, pulling her gaze up to meet his eyes, and Ashi felt her final shred of resolve crumble.

"I think," Carth said, "I would be hurt worse if I didn't try." And then, very slowly, he bent his face down to hers, and their lips met.

_Frack, _Ashi thought, the one clear thought in a flood of incoherency.

It was like electricity. First kisses were supposed to be soft and sweet, but this, after all, was a third kiss, and the rules were out the window. Ashi found herself leaning into it, pressing against him; her arms came up to wind around his neck, tangling in his hair. He kept a hand on her face, but the other slid down to her waist as he pulled her even closer. Ashi was struggling to understand exactly what had happened—this certainly hadn't been where she planned for the conversation to go—and at the same time, not really minding. It was like he was suddenly oxygen, and she wondered what she had been thinking, to try and go without this.

Ashi did know perfectly well that this really wasn't a good idea, but she couldn't find a good enough reason, or the willpower, to pull away. _Screw 'there is no passion'_, she thought determinedly. _In fact, screw 'no relationships' in general._ For the moment, something this good couldn't possibly be _bad_.

On the Ebon Hawk, Bastila, who was meditating, suddenly found images of a type she had certainly never experienced firsthand flooding her vision. She gasped and choked on the breath, coughing hard for several seconds. Once she could breathe again, however, what she had seen sunk in, and she felt her face form into a mask of pure horror.

Ashi wasn't sure how long the kiss lasted, beyond 'not long enough', but finally, Carth felt her lips curving into a smile, and she pulled away. "That was even better than Taris," she observed with a grin.

"Well, I was a little taken by surprise then," he replied, smiling. She laughed, muttering, "I'll bet," and then shifted slightly, leaning against his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her, and she sighed contentedly. It was so nice just to have him next to her. Ashi hadn't even known she'd wanted this—this _togetherness _with another person—until it was here, and inexplicably wonderful.

This new silence was peaceful: no more words danced behind reluctant lips, and no confessions hung, anticipated, in the air. The second sun fell lower and lower, a sliver of gold on the horizon, before finally slipping from view. Darkness was immediate, indigo blanketing the colony in heartbeats. It was only then that Carth looked down at Ashi, and observed, "We should head back to the ship."

Ashi made a face. "Bastila's going to murder me, isn't she?"

Carth, who hadn't thought if that, felt his eyes widen nervously. There were few things in the universe that genuinely scared him. This, however, was one of them. "Is she?" he asked, with trepidation.

She paused, considering all the possible scenarios, and then nodded. "Yes. Maybe not you, but definitely me."

"Maybe?" He glanced over at her, raising an eyebrow. "That's very reassuring."

She stood leisurely and reached for her jacket. "I think you'll be getting a lecture. Which is probably worse than being murdered, come to think of it."

He groaned, getting slowly to his feet. "Have I ever mentioned how glad I am you're not a Jedi?"

"I was already perfect," she shrugged matter-of-factly. A breeze gusted across from the desert, carrying the smell of dust and ancientness, and she pulled her jacket tighter around her shoulders.

With uncharacteristic perception, he noticed. "It's cold," he said tactfully. "We should get going."

Ashi nodded, turning away. The moon's faint light gleamed silver from the sand, but as she turned her back on the desert, her face filled with shadow. Momentarily, she paused. Nothing about the last hour had happened how she had planned, and yet she simply couldn't make herself feel at all sorry about it. Now, a single question remained, demanding to be answered.

_Is this what you want?_ her mind wondered, unbidden.

And Ashi knew that she had her answer. _Yes_, she thought determinedly. _For now._

So after just an instant, the slightest hesitation, she began to walk, heading back through the maze of sandstone that sprawled before her. "Come on, flyboy," she grinned over her shoulder. "I think we've let everyone wonder what we're doing long enough."

* * *

Back on the Ebon Hawk, Mission flopped to the side so her head rested against the window, looking out tiredly at the docking space. Had tumbleweeds existed on Tatooine, she had no doubt one would be rolling in front of her right now.

"It's dark, and they're not back yet," she called to no one in particular.

To her surprise, Dustil replied, from a chair nearby. "What's taking so long?" he wondered. "Do you think he found her?"

The uncertainty in his voice brought a smirk to her lips. Growing up in a city like Taris, Mission had always been partly impressed and mostly amused by naivety. "Oh, I'm sure he did," she replied deliberately, wondering how long it would take him to work it out.

Dustil, who had been busy levitating one of the many gizka they now possessed, suddenly caught on, and stared up at Mission, dropping the creature in shock.

"You think that my dad and Ash…" he started, and seemed unable to finish the question.

"'Bout time, too," Mission declared matter-of-factly. "Didn't I tell you about the cantina?"

He snorted. "Yeah, but you're so full of shavit sometimes that you can't blame me for not listening."

Mission was forming a reply when a flash of red outside the window caught her eye. Her gaze flew to the docking bay entrance, in time to see two figures emerge from the shadowed doorway. A grin sparkled on her lips.

"Shavit, huh? Want to say that again, Dustil?"

He saw her gaze fixed on the outside, and hurried over to look too. His eyes widened to approximately the size of dinner plates.

"I take it back, kid," he replied, and she elbowed him without looking away.

Ashi and Carth entered the docking bay, her a few feet in front, and him following contentedly, a step or two behind. They stopped after they entered, and Mission and Dustil stared at them, stunned at how _happy_ they both looked. It wasn't that Ashi didn't look happy most of the time, but it was different. Not quite more confident, exactly, but it was something, and it took the girl a moment to place it. She looked _peaceful_, maybe the one thing Mission had never expected from her. Carth, on the other hand, looked like he was positively glowing, which was perhaps even more of a shocker.

As they watched, Carth turned to Ashi and asked her something, his face unsure. Conversely, she smiled brightly and murmured something in reply, before leaning in to kiss him on the cheek. Dustil looked shell-shocked, and Mission realized suddenly, with an awkward jolt, how much this might upset him.

"You okay?" she asked nervously.

Dustil hesitated, eyes riveted to Ashi and his father, but then he sighed. "He looks happy, doesn't he?"

Mission looked out at Carth, frowning critically, before turning to the boy with a helpless shrug. "I think so," she admitted, and Dustil nodded as if he had already known her answer.

"Then… it's good, I guess," he said slowly. "Ash's cool. I mean, he could have picked someone a lot worse."

Mission nodded, unsure what to say. There was a moment of silence, and then they heard the ship door opening. Both teenagers exchanged a quick glance, and then simultaneously leapt from their seats, lunging for the door. Whatever happened next, it wasn't going to be worth missing.

Ashi and Carth walked onto the ship, both looking distinctly conspiratorial. Ashi broke the silence, murmuring, "I'm tired; I'm going to bed. Night, guys." She left the room, Mission trailing behind and already planning an interrogation. Carth looked after her, a bemused grin on his lips, and then turned and headed for the men's sleeping quarters on the other side of the ship.

An utter silence had descended over the ship, all eyes in the room gazing in one of the two directions they had gone.

"Well, they looked happy," Jolee remarked conversationally, after a pause. He was wholeheartedly ignoring Bastila, who stared at him in horror.

Canderous, unable to help it, snorted. "Of course he does," he replied, relishing the words—and more specifically, the look that the Jedi was giving him. "So," he smirked, turning to Jolee, "how far do you think he go—"

He was cut off by Bastila, who shoved past him with no effort to be gentle, storming to the sleeping quarters. Her face was bone-pale with anger, and it was only deep within her eyes, hidden under years of training and determination, that one could make out a tiny spark of fear.

* * *

The next day went reasonably well until they actually found the Sand People.

Ashi had taken HK, Mission, and Carth out to find their enclave with her, only to be mobbed by a tiny figure in a hooded cloak. To Carth and Mission's amazement, Ashi could understand his convoluted language, and so did HK. Together, the two managed to work out that the Jawa wanted his people rescued from the Sand People.

This was all spoken very rapidly—the small beings overcompensated for their size by speaking with daunting speed—and even Ashi had gotten lost. HK informed her, when she asked, that there was a 98% chance the Jawa wanted his people rescued.

"And the _other_ two percent?"

HK had paused. "Statement: there is a two percent chance the small meatbag is simply looking for trouble and ought to be blasted. This may be wishful thinking on my part, master."

There was little to be done about HK's mood. He was furiously indignant about being an ambassador rather than a weapon of mass destruction, and according to him, it was a dark day indeed. Ashi was also wondering whether it was worth the trouble, especially after they all had the oppressive Sand People robes on, direct from yesterday's corpses. Only Mission was in her perpetually bright mood, thrilled to be on her way to her brother.

Their disguises didn't last very long. It got them past the original guard, but as soon as they tried to enter the enclave, a furious Sand Person apprehended them. HK grudgingly refrained from blasting him, but soon after, Ashi wished they had let him. They all had their weapons taken and were stripped of the robes. That was fine for Mission, who had a tank top and shorts, and Carth, who had his Republic-issue clothes, but Ashi resented having to approach the chieftain in her underwear.

Still, no one could take her dignity, even if they could take everything else. She shot Carth light glares every so often when he smirked at her, and calmly began to converse with the leader. He didn't like her—that was fine; she didn't really like him either—but was willing to give her a chance. True to form, she had stood up straighter, grinned, and instructed confidently, "Ask him what he needs me to do."

"Statement: very well, master," sighed HK. "I would much rather this get bloody, but it is your call." He barked something quickly to the chieftain, and the Sand Person paused skeptically.

"Statement: he is expressing disbelief, master, and so am I," muttered the droid. "He requires proof of good faith. He wishes for you to make a contribution to his tribe, and then he will lower the attacks on the Czerka meatbags." Throughout the entire explanation, his voice had grown steadily more cynical. "Query: shall I blast him now, master?"

Ashi shook her head to both things. "Not good enough. Tell him the attacks have to stop." She didn't like Czerka, but compared to the furious Sand People, the suffering miners seemed the lesser of two evils.

HK looked as doubtful as physically possible, but relayed her negotiation. The chieftain listened, and then cut him off with a volley of furious barks. Ashi backed away as he reached for his gaffi stick.

"Fine!" she snapped. "Lowered attacks are fine! Ask him what he wants."

HK paused to listen to the chieftain bark for some time, before turning to Ashi. "Translation: he says they wish to move their tribe further into the desert, but they need moisture vaporators from the Czerka to do so. If you will go and bring these to him, then he will agree to lessen the attacks."

Ashi, who sorely missed her lightsaber, sighed. "Okay. Tell him I'll get them."

The Sand Person chieftain hadn't seemed to believe her. HK dropped a couple more hints that this ought to be violent, but Ashi was adamant on one point: it was never helpful to kill people mid-negotiation, no matter how tempting. There was also the fact that they were unarmed and all but totally helpless. Quickly, she promised the chieftain his vaporators, and they were allowed to leave.

And so it was that the four of them ended up trudging back across the Dune Sea to the Czerka shop. Thankfully, Ashi found a spare shirt and pair of leggings in her bag, but a smirk seemed permanently engraved into Carth's face. Mission also had a knowing grin, and Ashi was beginning to suspect that the girl, like always, knew more than she should.

The moisture vaporators were easy enough to get. Mikki still worked at the office in Anchorhead, and she was quickly persuaded to sell them for half the price. But by the time they had all trekked back to the settlement, it was mid-afternoon, and it was suicide to try to cross the desert at night. They all agreed to head back the next day, and made their way tiredly back to the ship.

The moment they arrived, Mission dug out her Pazaak deck and challenged Dustil to 'see if Sith cheated at this too'. He knew she was joking, but, pride now at stake, accepted anyway. No one on the crew could hide amusement—at one point or another, Mission had wrangled credits out of all of them. It was a unanimous conclusion that she cheated, but that was generally their way of saving face.

Dustil, blissfully unaware, settled down for the game. Carth seemed to be arguing with Jolee about the importance of this war, unable to grasp the old man's 'will it matter in ten thousand years?' perspective. Meanwhile, Ashi had someone to talk to as well.

"Bastila?" she said slowly, walking into their room.

The Jedi was on her bed meditating, and glared pointedly at Ashi as she came in. "Yes?"

If there was a point to being tactful, Ashi had never seen it. "Why do you hate your mom?" she asked, sitting down on her bunk.

The younger girl sighed. "I… no, I don't hate my mother. But she is a difficult woman, and we have a… a complicated past."

There was a pause, and then Ashi offered, "You want to tell me?"

Bastila paused, and then shrugged. "Very well, if you want to hear it." She took a deep breath, and her face became reminiscent. "When I was a child, my father was a treasure hunter. We used to travel the galaxy, searching for his newest finds. I loved my father… very much." She swallowed hard. "He was a good man. But my mother was constantly pushing him into danger. And then, when the Jedi offered to train me, he didn't want to give me to them, but she let them take me with no arguments at all."

Ashi flinched, surprised to find herself feeling sympathetic. "That's harsh," she murmured sincerely.

"I don't regret my training," added Bastila quickly, "and obviously, it was for the best, but my relationship with my mother did not improve. Jedi are not allowed contact with their families, for their own sake, and I never saw either of my parents again. My father tried to come to Dantooine to find me, but… the Jedi would not let me see him. They were very angry with him, and he was sent away." She paused, taking a breath that trembled slightly, and then finished, with icy finality, "I was six at the time."

"Oh." Ashi's eyes widened, and she found herself yet again taken aback, and feeling startlingly sorry for Bastila. "So what are you going to do?" she asked tentatively. "About your dad?"

"I… I am unsure," admitted Bastila. "I find it difficult to remain objective when it comes to her. That is… disturbing."

"But what if we find the holocron?"

"Well…" Bastila hesitated, chewing nervously on her lip. "Just because we find the holocron does not mean we have to give it to her."

"You'd _keep_ it?"

"My father recorded all his thoughts on there, even when I was still with him. To have it would be to have him with you. And… and I don't see why she deserves it!" the Jedi exploded, in decidedly the largest display of emotion Ashi had ever seen from her. "She had him for the last eighteen years, and I haven't seen him since I was six! She drove him to his death! I loved him… and I never had a chance to say goodbye."

"I guess…" Ashi murmured, "that sounds fair. You want it as a memory of him?"

Bastila grimaced. "There is a part of me that would keep it just so she would not have it. I do not like that part. I should be above such pettiness."

"Everyone's a little selfish," shrugged Ashi, leaning back leisurely against the wall. "You don't have to be good all the time, even if you are a Jedi."

"Ah. Yes." Bastila fixed her with a steely look, suddenly remembering something. Her voice was abruptly icy, and on hearing it, Ashi's sympathy was gone as suddenly as it had appeared. "Carth has taught you a lot about that, hasn't he?" the Jedi observed.

_Damn repercussions._ Ashi closed her eyes, sighing through her teeth."You did see that."

Bastila nodded tersely. "I suppose you know what I'm going to say."

"Hm. Let me guess," Ashi offered sarcastically. She closed her eyes as if to think, and held up a hand, listing on her fingers as she spoke. "I'm irresponsible, immature, and a disgrace to the Jedi; I've officially damned myself and am on the way to the dark side; I should probably go meditate right now on what I've done and why it was wrong; and right after that I should go to Carth and break up with him, because I'm not allowed to be happy. Or some combination of those," she added after a moment's consideration.

She gave the Jedi a bored glance from the side of her vision. "Did I get it?"

"It doesn't matter whether you are happy!" Bastila exclaimed, her voice rising. Ashi suspected it was because of how accurate her guess had been. "When you became a Jedi, you forswore love. There are—"

"Whoa! Love?" Ashi interrupted, mouth dropping open. "Who said anything about love? I don't _love_ him!"

"Well… passion, then," Bastila corrected hastily. "Passion leads to the dark side."

"As do a lot of good things," Ashi snapped. "Look, Bastila, try having a guy tell you you're his new reason to live, and then maybe you can talk. Anyway," she added, "the only thing I promised the Council was to find the Star Maps, and not go Sith. As far as I know, having Carth around doesn't affect my ability for either. If we care about each other, you shouldn't try to screw this up."

And, very wisely taking Bastila's hesitation to her advantage, Ashi stood and strode decisively from the room. The Jedi stared after her, biting her lip. Everything she had just said echoed in her mind, with an effect like hitting a bruise. She knew that she had just made things worse—and really, what did she expect? She didn't have Ashi's influence. All she had was the Code, and that didn't help now at all. A terrible weight settled on the girl's shoulders. What if Ashi were to fall again, and all because she hadn't been able to stop her?

They should have sent a master. She wasn't ready for this. It was amusing—ironic, even—how capable she'd thought she was before. _Arrogant_, accused her thoughts, dripping disgust. To grow up with a gift like Battle Meditation was to grow up with massive responsibility, but it seemed she was ready for none of it. Nothing—not even the _Jedi_, not even the _Code_—had prepared her for the weight of duty that filled her now. She was supposed to be strong, but at this moment, Bastila Shan only felt alone.

* * *

Saul approached Malak with a masklike face, only the slight pause between steps showing his fear. Sith were known to kill people who brought them bad news—but on the other hand, the Sith wouldn't be winning the damn war if it weren't for their admiral. Saul rather hoped, in light of this, that his life might be worth something to Malak.

"My lord," he said, lowering his head apologetically, and gazing steadily at the floor, "the bounty hunter Calo Nord is dead. He had failed in his mission. Forgive me."

Malak surveyed him with cold contempt. "The penalty for failure is death, Admiral Karath," he mused softly, and in the silence, Saul held his breath. "But," he continued, "the failure was the bounty hunter's, and not your own. You may rise."

Saul nodded and raised his head, swallowing a deep rush of relief. "Thank you, Lord Malak. Shall I hire another bounty hunter to send after—?"

"No," interrupted Malak. "It was foolish to send Nord in the first place." In truth, he had expected nothing more—this had been, after all, simply a test, to see if she was still as strong as before. "I was wrong to suspect a mere bounty hunter could best her. There will be no more hired mercenaries. My apprentice, Darth Bandon, will take care of them."

And now, this was no longer a game. This was a war. He had offered her a mild challenge; she had faced it down fearlessly. Now came a real test of her skill.

"Come, Bandon," he called, and the door flew open. The Sith apprentice stormed in, his dark robes flying behind him. It was no secret who he was trying to mimic, though he couldn't pull off the _evil overlord_ effect quite like the Sith Lord himself. Bandon knew that, and it was his single greatest shame.

A foolish officer, obviously either suicidal or incredibly stupid, began to stroll across his path, and Bandon threw out a hand. The Sith went flying into a console, which exploded in a blast of sparks, killing three more soldiers instantly. Saul sighed inwardly—it would take days to repair that. "Yes, my master?" asked Bandon, dusting off his hands in an exaggerated display of nonchalance. _Killing is nothing_, said his eyes.

Well, there _was_ a reason Malak liked him so much.

"Apprentice," said the Dark Lord, relishing the word—once, after all, it had applied to him. "I have a task for you."

* * *

**That doesn't _count_ as a cliffhanger. You all knew he was coming. R&r please; as always, reviewers get a quote or something cool like that...**


	20. Peace

**It's taking me a little while to update, but I'm recovering from an epidemic of writer's block. Maybe you guessed from the chapter title that this is a laid-back chapter, with very little violence. However, whatever conclusion you come to, keep the last line of the chapter in mind. It's going to be very relevant, very _very_ soon...  


* * *

**

**Peace: a state of mutual harmony or serenity**

Life was good.

Ashi didn't think she could remember a time when she had been happier since the moment she'd gotten caught in the Republic tractor beam. The situation with the Sand People had been negotiated, free of death. The chieftain seemed stunned at first when she actually returned, but since she had the vaporators, they wound up with, as HK put it, a 'sadly peaceful situation'. The Jawas were freed, and so was Mission's brother Griff.

Ah, yes. Griff. He was a slight deviation from the current state of things. Though Mission had been positively delighted when she first saw him, her doubts had obviously begun to catch up with her when, a moment later, he was wheedling her for credits. Needless to say, Mission was disgusted; not a word about how she had been, or an apology for abandoning her, but a plea for money, was too much.

To her credit, she hadn't shown Griff how upset she really was. Instead, she settled for shouting at him until he was cowering in front of her, before sending him fleeing into the Dune Sea. Ashi was impressed, but still observant enough to know that the girl wasn't as aloof as she acted.

"You okay, kid?" she wondered, as they began the long walk back. It was the same four of them from before—Ashi, Carth, Mission, and HK—but the pilot, showing an impressive amount of tact, hung back to let them talk.

"No," Mission deadpanned. "It's just… Ash, Griff was supposed to be there for me, you know? I thought Lena was lying about him, I really did. He used to be so great… or, you know," she murmured, "maybe that was just 'cause I thought so."

Ashi nodded. "I get it. You care about him. But he's a jerk, and it doesn't look like he's about to change."

"I figured he would, though," the girl said sadly. "I thought he'd change, you know? I didn't ask for nothing, Ashi; I just wanted to see him."

Ashi honestly wasn't sure if Mission knew how heartbreaking she sounded at that moment. "You might be better off without him, Mish," she offered. "You don't need him."

"And he doesn't need me," Mission muttered sullenly, with a sniff at the end.

"He loves you." Of that, Ashi could be sure. There had been genuine happiness in Griff's face when he'd seen his little sister alive, regardless of the first words out of his mouth. It wasn't enough to change what he'd done, but right now, she hoped it was enough for Mission. "He's a stupid son of a schutta, but he does care about you. But you've got us now, too, kid, and we do need you."

Mission hesitated. For a moment, her lips quivered just the slightest bit, but then they curled upwards. "You didn't think I'd ditch you guys, did ya?" she asked, grinning. Where're you supposed to get another stealth-tech?"

"I'm not about to try," Ashi had replied, nudging the girl lightly. "One of them is loud enough." Mission mock-scowled, crossing her arms, and Ashi—who really couldn't help it, _really_—added, "Course, Dustil would have a hell of a time with _two_ of them, wouldn't he?"

Mission went purple, suitably distracted from any thoughts of her brother, and muttered something about '_just friends_' that was as unintelligible as it was unconvincing. The subject of Griff was over and done with.

So he had been one of two bad things. The other was the dreams. Flashbacks of Red were ever more common, and ever more horrifying. Her friends had begun to worry when she occasionally blanked out, sometimes falling fully unconscious, and she had to blame it on the heat, or tiredness. Lies came easily… mostly, that was. But there were no excuses to be made for the nightmare. There was one recurring one that, even in the painful heat of the dual suns, gave her a chill just to think about it.

The beginning was always different, with a common theme: slaughter. A red lightsaber would dance through her hands, and thousands of faces always slipped past her eyes, all with the same expression: horror, fear, terror. Metallic breath was in her ears, shifting to cruel laughter—_mine?_ Ashi always wondered, and never had time to know. Again and again, a cold, barren world through cutout eyes, dusty and ancient, gone before it was real. And then…

Every night, it ended the same. Suddenly everything was pure white, nothing but swirling fog. She held a blue lightsaber in her hands. The only other person was a figure with lamp-gold eyes and pale skin, mottled with veins. Her hair was fiery red, and, but for the expression, the face was the same one Ashi saw in the mirror. All around the dark figure flowed a current of darkness, bloody mists that twined through her hair and coiled around her, congregating around her heart. Her lightsaber was a vivid, violent red, and her pale, dark-veined hands would clutch it lovingly. As always, she gave a catlike smile before lunging, straight towards Ashi…

But the nightmares always ended as just that: a dream. So, for the most part, Ashi was happy, and she didn't doubt that it was mostly thanks to Carth. Even Mission, while she was merciless in respect of Carth's age, was happy for them. Part of her though it must be nice to have something like this: Ashi was even brighter and more animated than usual, and Carth was cheerful, which for him was saying something. Of course, it had been clear to most of them that he either looked happier or far more irritated when he was around Ashi, but it seemed only the former could apply now. Nothing, it seemed, could ruin Ashi's newfound peace.

The state of the mission also put her in a good mood. The chieftain had given her, as well as his gaffi stick, directions to the remote Dune Sea, where he had seen the Star Map. Finding it was the only problem. According to the chieftain, it was in a low-lying cave near a large peak of rock—which would have been easy to find, expect for the thousand or so peaks of rocks in the area.

Still, Ashi, Carth, and Bastila managed to find it after their fifth day of searching. To their surprise, they weren't the only ones there. A Twi'lek and a human both stood outside the cave, arguing in voices that carried easily over the sand, cutting through the hot, dry air like knives.

"No, I don't care how fracking big it is!" snapped one man. "It's not worth this wait. I'm going in." The Twi'lek held out a hand to stop him—although, Ashi noticed, without much conviction—but the other hunter jerked away and stormed into the cave.

A moment later came a roar that seemed to shake the dunes themselves. A human cry of horror followed, but was cut off by a sharp snap, the crunch of teeth on bone. Ashi winced, and Bastila, besides her, had gone sheet-white. Even Carth looked horrified, his hand tightening on the handle of his blaster.

Only the Twi'lek was unperturbed, as he shook his head tiredly. /Impatient/ he sighed. /Such a trait is dangerous in a hunter./

Meanwhile, Ashi jogged closer. "Komad?" she called, peering hopefully at the Twi'lek. /Is that you?/

The Twi'lek turned, and then smiled as he saw her. /Ah: Ashi Lucas, from the hunting lodge. I thought I might see you out here. You looked like a hunter./

She grinned, flattered. /Wouldn't miss it. What's in the cave?/

His eyes immediately lit up, and his lekku began to twitch with excitement. /A very rare beast that I have tracked here/ he explained. /A Krayt dragon./

Bastila and Ashi's eyes widened, making Carth very nervous. /Krayt dragon?/ Ashi repeated, shaking her head slowly. /Those are huge! What are you going to do?/

/I have laid a minefield/ replied Komad calmly. /That will eliminate the dragon if it comes near it. But there is one final step to my plan./ He paused, and then smiled at Ashi. /Perhaps you would like to help?/

She frowned suspiciously. /How?/

/This is a critical part/ Komad explained. /The dragon must be lured from its cave, but I am unsure precisely how to do so. As you can see, it rarely ventures out, and I think that it may need to be baited. However…/

/You don't have anything to play bait/ she finished.

/The food of the great beast is almost exclusively bantha. The only bantha in this desert are those belonging to the Sand People, and they revere the animals. It would be suicide to try to steal some. And there is nothing else I could do to lure the dragon out unless…/

He stopped, and then surveyed Ashi curiously. /You are a Jedi, are you not?/

/I use the Force/ Ashi offered.

It seemed good enough for the hunter. /Perhaps you can help me, then/ Komad said, sounding satisfied. Ashi decided, as he chose not to question her choice of words, that she liked the hunter more and more. /Is there any way you could lure him out? I know little about Jedi techniques, but maybe there is something you could do?/

Ashi grinned. /I think so./ Then, to Carth's shock, she began to approach the cave.

"What are you doing?" he demanded, rushing towards her.

She rolled her eyes, giving him a resigned half-smile. "You really should learn Twi'leki. I'm going to make the dragon come out so Komad can blow it up."

"_How?_"

"Dangerously, of course," she grinned, and pulled away, continuing forward and leaving him spluttering. The mines stood out to her easily in the sunlight, glowing half-circles pooling beyond the cave's mouth, and she could pick her way between them. The air reeked of rotten meat and filth, and she bit down a gag as she stood at the entrance, reaching out with the Force.

There was a strange combination of darkness and life in the cave. The dragon had a massive Force presence, and combined with the tantalizing aura of the Star Map, it was overwhelming for a moment. Ashi fought a flood of lightheadedness, but reached out to the dragon's mind. For such a large creature, it was remarkable simple—she might as well have been dealing with a Kath hound. It took her a moment to grasp the flow of its thoughts, but as soon as she had a grip on its mind, she began to slip suggestions into it.

_Come out…_ she thought, more loudly as her confidence grew. _Food outside… come eat…_

Komad watched her with interest as she stood in front of the cave, eyes closed and completely unafraid. Her hand was moving in an action almost like molding clay between her fingers: the physical action of twisting the creature's mind. She hadn't been lying to say she used the Force.

It worked, too, and almost too well. Ashi snapped to sharply from a combination of her friends' cries and the thunder of footsteps as the dragon approached. It was massive—the size of the Ebon Hawk, perhaps, and it opened its mouth to roar, shaking the ground. Gold eyes glittered from deep in its head, and it was a scaly tan much like the desert. Two twisting horns protruded from its head, probably as thick as Ashi herself. She wondered in a moment of panic if the mines were enough.

But Komad was smart, and he had done his job well. A huge shock wave rippled the ground from behind her. She stumbled forward, but Carth, racing over, helped her up.

She turned just in time to see the scorched dragon corpse fall to the ground. Komad paused a second, making sure it was dead, and then hurried forward. He seemed to know exactly what he was doing as he reached for a sheath on his waist. A small blade glinted silver-white for a moment, catching the sun, and then he brought it forward, directly into the dragon's neck. Evenly, he slit the throat, before reaching in and pulling out a couple round objects.

/The pearls/ he explained, passing one to Ashi. /Do what you wish with yours. You have earned it./

She smiled. /Thank you, Komad. Good hunting./ He nodded in farewell, and then began to set off across the dunes. Meanwhile, Ashi and her friends entered the cave.

It was shadowy and surprisingly cool inside, away from the blazing sunlight. Ashi drew her lightsaber automatically to illuminate the darkness, and all of them hid grimaces at the smell, which, unfortunately, couldn't be helped as easily. There was little talking until they neared the end, and Bastila gave a sudden cry, halfway between a yelp and a sob.

A corpse, relatively fresh compared to some of the skeletons, lay festering near the cave wall. Bastila didn't seem to notice the creeping decay at all—she knelt beside the body, and squeezed her eyes tightly shut. Even through the bond, it was almost overwhelming; Ashi found herself biting back tears of her own as Bastila's sorrow poured into her mind. With a shaking hand, the Jedi touched the face, unperturbed by its growing corrosion, and took a deep breath that trembled just as much. Her eyes tilted from the face, and she reached across the body for a small object, lying cradled against its side. She held the holocron reverently, as if it were a priceless treasure—after all, to her it was—and then clutched it to her chest. Her back was to the two of them, but Ashi heard the small drip of a tear landing on the rocky floor.

_I'm sorry_, she thought softly through the bond, aware it was the only thing to say, and Bastila acknowledged it with a small nod. Then, brushing the sleeve of her robe across her face, she stood up, the holocron still tightly in her grasp. She looked like she was about to try and explain, but Ashi stopped her, shaking her head almost imperceptibly. _It's okay_.

Bastila hesitated, and then murmured, _Thank you_. Ashi nodded and then motioned her slowly forward.

The Star Map opened as they approached, like all the others had. Ashi took a long look at it, tracing invisible lines with her fingers and murmuring under her breath, before grinning.

"We've nearly got it," she said, anticipation coursing through her words. "One more map, and we'll be there."

That sent a thrill of excitement through all of them. The Star Forge so close—their mission really almost complete—seemed incomprehensible. They were actually going to save the galaxy, actually almost there. Even Bastila gave a watery smile and a small nod.

They made their way quickly to the cave's entrance, steps quickened by newfound enthusiasm and the smell, and it wasn't until they were there that Ashi's abrupt excitement lessened suddenly. Something was wrong: she could feel something dark nearby, but it wasn't the Star Map…

Suddenly, around the Krayt dragon corpse, she felt a flicker of an aura: someone was trying Force camouflage, but doing it badly. "There's someone there!" she hissed.

And then a bald man with a goatee and dark robes strutted around the edge of the corpse. Neither of her friends seemed to know him, but Ashi's fist tightened sharply on her lightsaber. This was the dark Jedi she'd seen on the Endar Spire—the one who had killed Trask.

"Ah," he sneered, from across the sand. "The rumors are true. And you are still alive—excellent. I was afraid someone else had killed you and deprived me of the pleasure."

"Nope," smiled Ashi. "Funnily enough, I tend not to be killed by things."

"We'll have to change that," he replied coolly. "You have only defeated a pathetic bounty hunter. I have studied at the foot of the Dark Lord himself." He paused, lip curling in a sneer that was clearly visible to all of them, and then drawzled, "My master will reward me greatly for your deaths."

"You're Malak's apprentice?" Ashi scoffed, drawing her lightsaber. "Kind of a letdown."

"Your bravado means nothing. I will crush you," Bandon snapped matter-of-factly. "Feel the wrath of the dark—"

It was a shame he was quick on the uptake, because if he hadn't been, it would have been a much shorter battle. As it was, Ashi's ferocious attack nearly drove straight into his face, and he met her violet blade with his red one only inches from his pale, vein-ridden skin. In an instant, the battle had begun. Bastila lunged at a dark Jedi, leaping and spinning with her gold lightsaber flashing.

Carth hung back uncertainly—he doubted he would be that much good against anything with a lightsaber. However, the other dark Jedi apparently thought he wasn't worth fighting, and decided it would be fun to attack Ashi instead. While Bandon wasn't much for technique, he was strong, and Ashi was having trouble repelling his attacks, let alone dodging two Sith at once.

"Help!" she called to Carth, and immediately he drew his blaster. The dark Jedi had completely counted him out, and was stunned when a perfect blaster bolt caught him in the hand and sent said appendage, along with his lightsaber, flying. Ashi managed a grateful momentary smile, between the clashes and swishes of lightsabers.

It was an intense fight. Carth couldn't help her, busy as he was keeping up with the dark Jedi—who knew they kept fighting after you cut off their hand?—and Bastila was even less helpful. _Of all the days not to bring Juhani…_ Ashi thought, catching sight of the girl from the corner of her eye. The Sith that Bastila was fighting must have been the equivalent of a Guardian, and she was clearly outmatched.

Bandon knew that Ashi was the most capable, but he didn't seem worried. Even as she matched his every attack with a parry, his every leer with a cool grin, he could see her arms beginning to shake from the effort of blocking his powerful swings. Even being who she was, he observed with a smirk, she was still human, and surely could not be as powerful as before.

Yet Ashi would never admit that she was weakening. Their blades clashed and locked, and for a sudden moment they were face to furious face. She smirked at him. "Tired yet?"

He snarled and pulled back, blocking her low swipe, and the next moment, everything went wrong for Ashi.

Somehow, the dark Jedi fighting Bastila got in a stroke of lightning, and she fell to the ground, smoking gently. It took Ashi only a moment to process this through their bond, another to realize they wanted the brat alive, and a third where the dark Jedi moved in on her to figure out they didn't feel the same about her. And then she had two dark Jedi attacking her, when she had been hard-pressed with just the one.

It wasn't that either of them was better than her. But Bandon was taking all her concentration as it was, and she couldn't defend from all sides at once. _Someone…_ she thought desperately as she spun, blocking and dodging with aching arms. _Bastila, Carth, someone help me…_

Then the other Jedi slipped in his technique, and Ashi pounced on it in a flash. In an instant, she had run her blade through his chest. He collapsed, and she felt proud for a moment, before she realized with horror how vulnerable she was. Though she turned instantly, it wasn't enough, and Bandon's blade swiped her side. She cried out and stumbled, and a shove of his hand sent her to the ground.

Blood was running down her waist—_running? Gushing, it's gushing, that's a _lot _of blood_—as he advanced. She tried to scramble back, but every motion sent stabs of fire through the entire right side of her body, and she slipped. Carth was nowhere to be seen; there was only the horrible black figure that obscured her vision, raising his blade over her.

Bandon paused, savoring the moment. Ashi's head was spinning, and her side still felt like it was being set on fire, but she gritted her teeth, forcing out a hand. Bandon staggered, almost losing his balance, and growled angrily. Of course he should have anticipated this, though, her fighting to the very end. Resolute, he raised his blade. Maybe Ashi should have closed her eyes, but she didn't. The dark Jedi smiled…

And then stiffened unexpectedly, as a blaster shot rang out, shattering silence she hadn't noticed.

Suddenly, Bandon collapsed forward, and Carth was behind him, his blaster still raised. He watched coldly as the Sith fell, and then his eyes flitted to her, and his face was immediately full of concern.

"Ashi?" he demanded, racing over and kneeling beside her. "Ashi, are you okay?"

She closed her eyes, willing herself calm. "I can heal," she managed through her teeth. Carefully, she drew on the Force, and to her relief found it there. Taking a deep breath, she concentrated, and her wound closed over. With a sigh, she opened her eyes, in time to find Carth staring at her anxiously.

"Good timing, flyboy."

He laughed in relief. "I try."

Ashi smiled, too. "Thank you," she murmured, and reached up to him. He helped her sit up as he kissed her back. It was soft and warm, full of relief, and reminded her for a moment of Red and Alek's kiss after the cave—though she brushed that thought off. But when she eventually pulled back to breath, he wasn't done. He gazed down at her with almost a smirk.

"I promised to protect you," he reminded her smugly, and she fought a grin that threatened to break her jaw. How did this possibly work: how could they be so different, and yet he be so perfect?

She wrapped her arms around him suddenly, burying her face in his shoulder. Immediately, he pulled her closer to him for reassurance, the only sign of how worried he'd really been. She could have sat there forever—and she might have, too—but at that moment, shock echoed through her mind as Bastila awoke.

Ashi was eternally grateful that Bastila didn't lecture them right there, for she didn't doubt that the Jedi could have. Instead, she simply sat there awkwardly, and Ashi pulled away, indicating the younger girl with a jerk of her head. Carth paused, and then shrugged indifferently. It didn't even seem worth coming up with an explanation.

Calmly, Ashi got to her feet. "You missed a good fight," she remarked, as she picked up her lightsaber. Her side gave a twinge as she bent over, but she steadfastly ignored it.

"We ought to return to the Ebon Hawk," Bastila said, mirroring Ashi's even tone. "They will be wondering where we are."

She was right: the sky was getting dark, and they didn't want still to be out by the time the second sun had set. The three of them began the trek back to Anchorhead, two of them sure that their work on Tatooine was done.

Ashi, however, knew differently.

* * *

Bastila was perfectly ready to leave by the next morning. She was not ready to be dragged to the cantina by a stubborn Ashi to say goodbye to her mother. But Ashi was nothing if not just that—furiously stubborn—and so it was that Helena and Bastila were staring each other down again. The ice in both their eyes was enough to cause frostbite, and while Bastila scowled daggers, Ashi tactfully moved off to the side.

Helena was first to talk. "Well. Back again," she observed blandly. "And do you have the holocron?"

Bastila raised her chin stubbornly. "Yes," she snapped. "I am simply not sure I wish to give it to you."

"Oh? And why not? Would you deny me even that?"

Bastila flushed with anger. "I have never denied you anything, _mother_. You think I don't remember before I went to the Order, but I do. You were eager to send me to the Jedi. You _gave me away_. And you were always pushing Father into his treasure hunting so you could live in comfort! You're the reason he died!" she accused heatedly. "You took Father from me, and this holocron is all I have of him now!"

Helena hid the hurt in her eyes well—Ashi almost didn't see it. "Fool girl. You have an odd way of remembering things. It—"

"No," interrupted Bastila. "I do not wish to argue. It is time we parted ways, mother, for both our benefit."

_Damn!_ Ashi thought furiously. She had to do something. Bastila was _not_ leaving without facing this. The Jedi tried to turn and walk away, and found, to her shock, that she couldn't. It only took one glance down for her to see the violet stasis encasing her legs from the knees down. She began to object to Ashi, eyes narrowing viciously, but the other girl shook her head.

"I get that you guys have issues," she said calmly, "but you need to deal with them. You're not leaving unless you listen to her."

Bastila stared, and Ashi saw a sharp flicker of fury in her eyes. "This is none of your concern," she hissed. "You don't know my mother. She is a notoriously deceptive woman; she…"

"Save it," Ashi interrupted, "or I'll freeze your mouth too. Why don't you try just to give her a break?" She paused. "Come on. She's your _mom_."

"I… I…" Bastila struggled desperately for words, eyes darting between Ashi and Helena. Finally, they came to a stop on the latter. For a moment, the Jedi stared at her mother, and then she hung her head. "I… I'm sorry, mother," she murmured hesitantly. "I just find it so... so difficult to let go of the past."

Helena looked stunned at Bastila's new remorse, but had her own apology. "I was hard on you, as well. I wasn't a very good mother. But your father loved you so much, dear. He wanted you to be just like him… wanted to take you on his hunts, but they were too dangerous!" She sighed. "I tried to keep him from the worst ones, but he would have none of it. He was already risking his life, Bastila. I couldn't… I couldn't have managed if I had lost both of you.

"And then the Jedi came, and I knew you would be safe with them. Your father was furious with me, but I knew this way… if I had to lose you, then at least this way you would be all right."

Bastila stared in disbelief, blinking after a moment. "_That_ was why you gave me away?" she asked faintly.

"What do we have to show, from all those years of treasure hunting? Nothing. It was no life for anyone, especially not someone as talented as you. He spent all these last years trying to earn money for my treatment. That was why he wanted the pearls—I begged him not to, but he wouldn't listen."

"Your treatment?" Bastila echoed in horror. "You mean… you really are…"

"I'm dying," said her mother bluntly. "There's nothing that can be done. I tried to tell your father that, but you know how he was. Stubborn… like you." She paused, with a worn expression, and then added suddenly, "Keep the holocron. I think you should have it. This—talking to you—this was what I really needed."

"Yes. Yes, I'm glad that we could talk, mother."

Her mother smiled, this time a genuine one. "Well. You said you had important business, and you were never one to mince words."

For the first time, Bastila hesitated. "But where will you go?".

"Oh, dear…" Her mother shook her head, waving it off. "Don't you worry about me."

"No. Here," the Jedi said firmly, digging into her pocket. "Take these credits, and go to Coruscant, and find a doctor. I can find you there after I finish…" She broke off suddenly. "After I finish what we have to do."

Helena shook her head. "Dear, I told you, there's nothing they can—"

"Please," Bastila insisted, pressing the credits into her mother's hand. "Please take them. I want to see you again, mother."

Helena sighed resignedly and nodded. Her hand closed on the money, and despite herself, she looked grateful. "All right. You do what you have to do—and you make me and your father proud."

Bastila laughed sheepishly, nodding. "I'll try… I will," she corrected hesitantly. "Goodbye, mother." She glanced at Ashi, and added mentally, _Can you let me go so I can hug her?_

Ashi released her immediately—she had forgotten Bastila was still stuck—and the mother and daughter embraced. Ashi glanced away uncertainly. Finally, wiping her eyes quickly, Bastila pulled away, and left the cantina. It didn't escape Ashi's notice that the girl looked considerably happier.

* * *

Ashi understood Mandalorians. She wasn't sure quite why or how, but she knew how they worked, and what they did, and why they did it. Obviously, she knew that the most important thing to the real ones was their honor. Therefore, she understood why if Canderous had been challenged concerning his honor, there was nothing to do but meet the challenge in typical Mandalorian way: head-on and fearlessly.

To Canderous's surprise, she hadn't forgotten about his duel with Jagi. What was more, she refused to let him go alone. Canderous had tried to explain about honor and the fact that he needed to face this by himself. Ashi responded with a line that usually worked well for her—I don't _care_—followed by, "I'm coming no matter what, Ordo. So let's _go_."

There was no arguing with that, not even if you were a six-foot-warrior. It turned out Canderous couldn't really complain when they met Jagi, who was flanked by two alien lackeys.

"Canderous Ordo," the warrior said calmly, as they approached. "And I see you brought a friend. Very honorable of you."

"As did you," pointed out Canderous, fists clenching.

"Ah, but I have reason to doubt you already," Jagi pointed out, a smirk widening across his face as he saw Canderous's jaw clench. Is this not a challenge on _your_ honor?"

"Anyway," Ashi threw in, "I came because I wanted to, not because of you." She addressed Jagi with equal scorn.

"Indeed." His eyes moved slowly over Ashi, lingering everywhere but her face, and after a moment he snorted. "Nice girl, Canderous. So, does she fight, or is she just there for entertainment?"

His slight sneer made it clear what 'entertainment' meant. Only the thought of Canderous's honor—and the fact that it would only make her look more like Canderous's personal Kath hound—kept Ashi from lunging right then, but she gritted her teeth and kept quiet.

Luckily, Canderous cut in before attacking became too tempting. "Enough of this talk, Jagi. Let's do what we came here to do."

Jagi grinned. "Certainly, Canderous," he agreed, beginning to draw a vibroblade.

In retrospect, it seemed stupid, but at that moment, Ashi was feeling resentfully perverse. "Why?"

They both stopped and stared. "We know what we must do. This must only end in death," snapped Jagi, at the same moment as Canderous said, "This is a matter of honor, Lucas. I cannot stand by this insult."

"Uh-huh," she nodded skeptically. "Yeah. _Why?_"

Canderous looked ready to explode. "He has slandered me!" he exclaimed. His glare at Ashi demanded to know what the hell she thought she was doing.

"As you deserve!" Jagi snarled. "The deaths of my comrades—your warriors—is one that can only be paid in blood, by you. You saw the prospect of glory and abandoned us for it—left your own men to die!"

"If I had not attacked when I did, the battle might not have been won!"

"You know we would have won!" Jagi spat. "But _you_ would not have gotten your glory. That was what really mattered to you, wasn't it?"

Even Ashi had to admit that Canderous looked bad right now, but the warrior was shaking his head. "That's not what happened," he insisted.

"What did?" she prompted.

"It was a difficult battle," Canderous said, eyes flashing. "I saw a break in their ranks, and I had to take the chance. If I had not done what I did, many more would have died, and we still might have lost. You _knew_," he continued to Jagi, "how important it was to take Althir. We had to win."

Jagi spat on the sand, disgusted beyond any kind of words. "You were a coward—a glory-hunter. You had direct orders, you were part of a _plan_, and you abandoned it all. You abandoned _us_!"

"And…" Canderous paused, looking sorry for a moment. "I regret their loss. But it was still necessary."

Inexplicable as it was, Ashi could see what she needed to do, what Jagi would listen to. If he could be convinced that Canderous had been strategically right, he would accept it; Canderous's honor would be left intact, and they would be off the hellhole of a planet. However, she also knew Canderous, to whom negotiation meant firepower—and lots of it—couldn't be the one to persuade him.

"Jagi," she called, ignoring the glare from Canderous burning holes in her back, "what if Canderous is right about the battle? He could have made the right decision."

"He abandoned us!" Jagi growled, shaking his head. His eyes were flat and merciless. "He sacrificed our lives for his own triumph!"

"He might have saved more lives this way," she offered.

"He cost us ours! But…" The Mandalorian hesitated, seeming surprised at his own words. "But I do see your point."

And now he was speaking to Canderous instead, Ashi and his newfound doubt enough of a catalyst. "But why did you have to leave us to die, while you won the battle for yourself?"

"I fought the battle for Mandalore," Canderous snapped. "Never myself, Jagi. I fight for my clan and my honor. I saw a chance and I had to take it. I ended the battle quicker, and saved more of our people. Mandalore taught us that opportunism was to be admired in a warrior. You may contradict me, but do you contradict him as well?"

Jagi was silent for a moment, and then shook his head slowly. "No. I… I see that I have been wrong. I was not true to the teachings of Mandalore. I was wrong to question your honor, Canderous. Now I must cleanse my own with my life."

"What?" Ashi demanded, but Canderous nodded, taking it in stride.

"And so it shall be," he said, with finality.

Jagi's vibroblade hissed as he drew it out, and gleamed momentarily in the sun before it found a new sheath. Ashi closed her eyes, lowering her head and reminding herself she should have sent this coming. A faint choking noise carried through the still air, and then a thump that was muffled against the ground. Only the thugs, wondering what they should do now. They seemed to settle for 'kill them anyway', and rushed Ashi and Canderous, but were on the ground in seconds, left for the scavengers.

There was sudden silence. Canderous strode towards Jagi's corpse, his face unsure and sad.

"I think," he murmured gruffly, "this had affected me in ways I didn't anticipate. I… I'll need some time to sort this out." He turned to Ashi, nodded with genuine gratitude. "Thanks for what you did there," he said slowly. "I just… need a while."

She understood Mandalorians, enough to know they were a hell of a lot more complicated than they seemed. She also knew there was only one way to reply. She gave him an even nod, and followed him when he turned, even footsteps carrying them in silence towards the small colony on the horizon.

* * *

"Feel better?" Ashi asked smugly, leaning against the doorframe.

It was a couple hours into their trip; they were already in hyperspace. Again, Ashi and Bastila were in their quarters on the Ebon Hawk—it seemed to be where the Jedi liked to go to think. She had been gazing off into space, eyes pensive and unfocused, but jumped and then nodded as Ashi spoke. "Yes," she affirmed, glancing over. "Talking to my mother brought me a lot of peace. Thank you."

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "You're thanking me for paralyzing you? Hey, no problem. I can do it again, if you want."

Bastila rolled her eyes, her mood changing abruptly. "However, I do need to speak with you."

Crossing the room, Ashi dropped onto her own bunk with a resigned sigh. "It's about me and Carth, right?"

"Both of you know that you are wrong!" Bastila snapped, furious at the nonchalance with which she was met. "Emotional relationships are forbidden—it doesn't matter if you consider yourself a Jedi or not. It is still dangerous for both of you."

Ashi frowned thoughtfully. "Why is it so dangerous? I mean," she clarified, at the look on Bastila's face, "why does it matter so much to you? You've got your mom," she added. "What about the whole 'no family' thing?"

"That is not relevant," Bastila snapped. "Kindly do not bring my mother into this."

"Yeah?" Ashi challenged, straightening and meeting Bastila's glare. "_Kindly _don't keep giving me and Carth dirty looks all the fracking time! It isn't that big a deal. Why do you always care so much when I do things wrong? You never yell at Dustil, and _I_ wasn't even a Sith before!" she exclaimed, gesturing furiously.

Bastila bit her lip, looking intensely uncomfortable. Ashi only noted it briefly—she was more interested in the Jedi's actual answer. "Why does it matter so damn much?" she pressed. "Why do you even—"

"You could fall!" Bastila blurted. "You could fall, like before, and I… I can't…"

Suddenly, it seemed to register with the Jedi what she had said. She went sheet-white, her eyes growing wide in terror. Ashi raised an eyebrow fractionally.

"Before?" she prompted.

"With… with Revan and Malak." Bastila was a terrible liar, and she knew it, but if she skirted the truth, then maybe, she hoped, it would go unnoticed. "They were Jedi before, but they fell in love, and that was why they fell. It changed their whole perspective on the Jedi teachings, and it led them to doubt the morals they had been taught. Revan and Malak fell because of their love."

"So _they _fell," Ashi replied mercilessly, her tone utterly dismissive. "That makes it a _weakness?_ What if Carth helps me not to fall, Bastila, did you ever think of that? Maybe if I have him, then I'll have a good fracking _reason_ to stay light."

Bastila hesitated. The basis of her teachings was collapsing in front of her, a house of cards that Ashi had set crashing to the ground with a few relentless words. "Passion is wrong…" she protested feebly.

"This isn't about passion," Ashi interrupted. "This gives me _peace_. If that's a problem too, then I can't help you."

She stood sharply and left the room, making her way into the hall. However, after only an instant, her footsteps stuttered, as she saw him leaning against the wall. Her mouth fell open, and she found her self-assurance from a moment ago gone as she stumbled for words.

"Did you—?" she began, and his smile stretched a little further.

"I'm your reason not to fall?" he asked, straightening and approaching her.

Ashi struggled to keep her tone nonchalant as he moved closer. "Did I say that?"

"More or less," he replied, a wide, satisfied grin still painted across his face. It was irritating, but, she observed, extremely attractive at the same time.

"Well." _Two can play at that game._ "Don't let it go to your head," she said, smirking coyly, as her fingertips brushed his shoulder.

"Too late," he murmured, and leaned in. Ashi kissed him back unreservedly, and if Bastila gave a despairing little cry at the back of her mind, then she didn't notice. Life was good, and that was nice.

Because everything was about to go wrong.

* * *

**That does count as a cliffhanger. But it was a completely necessary one. Seriously ;)**

**R&r, as always, and happy Thanksgiving to anyone else from America!**

**--skrybble  
**


	21. Leviathan

**Man, my life is crazy. Good and bad crazy--my birthday was a few days ago, but, on the other hand, midterm exams are coming up way too fast. Good luck to everyone else cramming for that; and anyone who's not, _treasure it_. You don't know how lucky you are. Thanks, as always, to reviewers--nothing's better fuel for writing :)  


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**Leviathan: anything of immense size and power  


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It was midnight on the Ebon Hawk, when a sudden jerk threw Ashi off her bed and onto the floor. She was reminded, with a sense of foreboding, of the Endar Spire, and the thought alone dispelled any lingering tiredness. Leaping to her feet, she raced to the cockpit, catching herself on walls and doorframes as more shudders wracked the ship.

"What the hell is…" she began from the doorway, but her voice trailed off almost immediately. Instead, she found herself lost for words, staring in horror at the massive silvery object taking up most of the view. Suddenly, the Ebon Hawk felt very small.

"Sith interdictor ship," Jolee replied grimly, to her unfinished question, hands flying over the panel in front of him as he struggled to free the Ebon Hawk. One of the crew always slept in the pilot seat, just in case, but there had never been a time when they had needed to be there before. Now, none of his efforts seemed to make any difference. No matter how hard he struggled, they were moving closer and closer to the ship, caught as if in a riptide.

"They must have been waiting for us on the hyperspace route," Bastila added, as the old man growled in frustration.

Ashi had gotten enough to realize what was happening. "We got tractor-beamed?"

"Yes, damn it!" Jolee snapped, seeming to realize that he was fighting a hopeless battle.

Ashi was staring at the mass of harsh gray metal ahead of them with a distant and puzzled expression. "What ship is that?" she asked, frowning as she tried to place where she was sure she had seen it before. It was eerie: huge and gray, shaped like a giant hand. The imagery, especially while they were caught in its grip, sent a shiver down her spine.

"It's the Leviathan," murmured a voice from behind her, and she turned to see Carth striding into the cockpit, his voice a monotone. "Saul Karath's vessel. My old mentor." He crossed his arms, an unreadable expression on his face.

"He's on there?"

Bastila was looking worried now, and Ashi wouldn't have been all too surprised if she had started hyperventilating. "And I suspect that Malak will be close behind, when he gets word that we are here," the Jedi added.

Ashi swore under her breath, and then beckoned them with a jerk of her head. Lips pressed together, her mouth had lost its customary grin, and was a grim slash in her pale face. "Come on," she said resignedly. "You're not going to be able to stop it, Jolee, and we need to figure out what we're going to do."

The entire crew was awake by now, and they met in the central room of the ship, Canderous the first to speak. "What's going on?" he demanded, and Ashi explained tersely, as her friends' faces grew more and more anxious.

"Who's Saul Karath?" asked Mission, after Ashi finished, and both Carth and Dustil's faces darkened.

"He attacked Telos," Carth explained bitterly. "He was my mentor, but he betrayed all of us."

"The guy who killed my mom," Dustil clarified, and Mission's face filled with horror and sympathy. Ashi paid them no attention: she was more worried by the set determination in Carth's eyes.

"Don't do anything stupid, Carth," she warned, and he turned to her incredulously.

"I know, Ashi, I won't," he replied automatically; but he hardly glanced at her, and she wasn't reassured. Walking over, she grabbed his shoulder and pulled him to face her, capturing his attention.

"_Nothing stupid_," she repeated determinedly. "You've got a purpose besides revenge now, right?"

He smiled, and the ice in his eyes thawed a little bit. Even though he nodded, however, and gently this time, she still made sure she was still looking him in the eyes, demanding proof of his sincerity. "I won't throw our lives away in some mad quest for vengeance," he said quietly. "But if I get a chance at Saul sometimes during our escape… no one better get in my way."

Exactly what Ashi expected. She nodded approvingly. Bastila, on the other hand, was not quite so satisfied.

"Talk of escape?" she wondered skeptically. Ashi turned to look at her quickly, having half-forgotten everyone else's presence. "Isn't that a little presumptuous? We don't even have a plan to get out of this mess yet!"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "Well, then, why don't you try helping? What do you think we should do?"

Bastila hesitated. "Well… perhaps Saul doesn't know how many of us there are. One of us could escape on their own and stage a rescue."

Juhani nodded, siding with her fellow Jedi. "I agree. We simply must choose the one with the best chance to rescue us."

Without a moment's pause, all eyes swung to Ashi. "Ashi. No question," Dustil said, and Mission nodded enthusiastically, adding, "No _duh_."

But Bastila shook her head. "No, I suspect Admiral Karath will have the three of us—" here, she broke off and gestured to Ashi, Carth, and herself "—under close watch. We should find someone else."

"Well, if we're going to pick someone," Carth broke in, glancing around edgily, "then we better do it quick. In less than a minute we're going to have Sith troopers pouring in here."

Reluctantly, Ashi nodded, although it was obvious from her expression she would have liked being the rescuer. "Yeah, I guess. Someone who they won't know, right?" When the Jedi nodded, she turned certainly, and said, "I pick Mission and Dustil."

Both teens looked shocked, but she continued, "Mission can slice the security, and Dustil, you're a good enough fighter to protect both of you."

Slowly, they both began to grin. "Yeah!" Mission beamed. "No problemo." Ashi smiled, but it faded when, then next moment, the shuddering jolt of contact made all of them hope nervously that the plan was a good one.

The clack of boots on metal announced the arrival of the Sith, and Ashi and her friends grudgingly made no resistance as they were marched onto the larger ship. Mission had flipped on her stealth before they could arrive, and Dustil was cloaking himself with the Force, when one of the Sith left on board frowned.

"Hey," he called, "there's supposed to be a little Twi'leki schutta, too. Did you find her?"

Mission's eyes widened, her mouth going suddenly sandpaper dry, but took a deep, resolute breath nonetheless. At the noise, Dustil glanced over, realizing her intentions in an instant. He grabbed for where he hoped her arm to be, but Mission darted out of reach, before turning off her stealth belt and stepping nervously into the room.

"What's going on?" she asked, feigning fright, as the troopers descended on her like vultures.

"Shut up and walk," snapped one, grabbing her arms and jamming a blaster in between her shoulder blades, and, glancing around nervously, Mission was marched off the ship. Dustil slipped off after her before it closed, and trailed several yards behind.

They were all split up, stripped, and taken to separate cells. Most of them were busy acting resentfully submissive, but Mission—who was and had always been extremely perceptive—was preoccupied: she had picked up a shimmer in the air about the right size to be Dustil. Since that was reassuring, she was inclined to hope that it was. If it was real, it was following her, when they split up the group—and if it wasn't, she was having some kind of breakdown. Mission hoped it was the first.

She was distracted as they arrived. The Sith guarding her didn't seem happy to have been saddled with the youngest crewmember to guard, and shoved her roughly forward as they arrived, taking it out on the underdog like he had been taught.

"Come on, girlie, into the cell," he ordered brusquely. "I don't have all day to waste on you, I have to get back to my post."

Mission, who resented being called 'girlie', scowled. "Quit crowding me," she snapped, as he nudged her forward. "Jeez, I've met Gammoreans who smell better than you."

"You think you're pretty funny, don't you, you little schutta? But you're only making it worse for yourself."

"Yeah, uh-huh." She rolled her eyes, reflex triumphing over sense as it often did. "How come every time you open your mouth, the smell of rancor crap comes out?"

"Maybe a little time in _solitary_ will teach you a little respect for the Sith! Now get in that cell!"

She took a couple steps in, since he _was _holding a gun, but remarked, "Respect? Hey, I'm sorry, but I can't take you seriously in that uniform. I mean, who designed it, anyway? A blind Rodian with a sick sense of humor?"

The Sith took a few steps towards her, and suddenly seemed kind of big as he loomed over her. "You know, that's pretty funny. You should tell that one to the torturer when he comes to deal with you."

Mission saw the shimmer again, now near the entrance to the cell. She was really starting to hope it was real. She made her face suddenly panicky and worried, setting her lower lip trembling slightly—the whole expression was only half faked—and whimpered, "Wait, you're… you're going to torture me?"

"No snappy comeback this time?" challenged the Sith. "The thought of torture _scares_ you? Because it should! The Sith have ways of…"

He was cut off suddenly as a lightsaber beam unexpectedly exploded through his chest. He stared down at it for a stunned moment, and then the blade deactivated and the Sith fell. Dustil stood behind him, looking pleased with himself.

"Dustil!" Mission exclaimed happily, throwing her arms around him in delighted relief. The next moment, she realized what she was doing and pulled away quickly to redeem herself. "I mean, uh… 'bout time."

"Miss me?" he offered, grinning, before his eyes began to drift down and he smirked a little. "Nice outfit."

Mission became suddenly aware of her low-cut tank top and shorts, and flushed a light purple. "Yeah, yeah," she muttered, turning quickly away to hide the blush painting her cheeks. Hurriedly, she bent down to lift the gun from the Sith's hands, and rifle carefully through his pockets. After a moment, her hand closed around something, and with a grin, she withdrew a passcard. "This'll be enough to get into the system," she said coolly. "I'm pretty sure I can hack it from there."

Dustil nodded, reluctantly impressed, and drew his lightsaber. "Now we have to find a computer, right?"

She nodded.

"Which means getting rid of all the Sith between here and the computer, right?"

This time, a wicked smile. "Yep."

"Then we'd better get going," he said readily. Mission nodded eagerly, hefting her newfound blaster, and the two of them made their way quickly out of the cell.

* * *

Meanwhile, Ashi, Carth, and Bastila were stripped of their clothes and weapons as well, before being marched to the torture section of the ship and shoved roughly into three different, cramped cells. A couple moments later, a man wearing a dark green jacket and a cold, detached expression strode in, boots clicking tersely on the floor.

"Carth," he said, in a tone dripping apathy. His boots _clacked_ themselves closer with measured paces. "It has been some time since we last spoke. I see the recent months have not been kind in your case. I barely recognized you."

Carth's face had contorted with fury the moment the man strode in, a promise of things to come. "But I recognized you, Saul," he spat. "I see your face every night, as I promise myself I'm going to kill you for what you've done."

Ashi stared quietly. This was a whole new side of Carth; even she had never seen him this angry. Had he been armed, Saul probably should have been very frightened.

But the admiral looked unconcerned. "Did you learn nothing in your time under me? This was an act of war, Carth; sometimes casualties are unavoidable."

"It was a _cowardly act of betrayal!_" snarled Carth. "You and your fleet bombed helpless innocents, and the blood of those people is on _your_ hands!"

"Sometimes, even the innocent suffer. This was the only way to prove I had truly turned my back on the Republic."

Abruptly, Carth's voice was soft and dangerous. "My wife died in that attack, Saul. And for that, I swear I'll kill you."

Saul sighed, shaking his head in mocking disappointment. "You used to be a man of action, not empty words. Cling to your foolish lust for revenge if you must, but do spare me the tired threats. I've heard them all before.

"Anyway," he continued, and his eyes drifted to Ashi and Bastila, mainly the former. Against reason, he found himself filled with nostalgia as he looked at her. Despite the year or two since the last time he had seen her, she looked just the same, and he was reminded again of he had missed her as his commanding officer. She really was one-of-a-kind. "Lord Malak is more interested in your Jedi companions. He has great plans for you."

"We will _never_ serve Malak or the dark side!" Bastila reproached, instinct speaking for her, and Saul smiled wolfishly.

"Your words are brave, Bastila, but the lure of the dark side is hard to resist… or so I've been told. I wonder if your companion is as devoted to the light as you are." Saul looked over at Ashi, raising his eyebrows. _Moment of truth_, he thought wryly.

Ashi crossed her arms stubbornly. "I'm not a Jedi," she replied, "but I'm even less of a Sith."

_Interesting_. Saul nodded slowly. "I see. Well, I am sure Malak would find your refusal… amusing, but nevertheless. He would probably reward me if I simply killed you all now," he mused, enjoying the fear on, at least, Bastila's face, "but perhaps he will want to question you due to the trouble you've caused him… and the history between you." _See if she picks up on that one_.

Ashi frowned, looking bewildered. "History? Uh, no, sorry; I don't know him. I think I would have remembered the jaw."

A slow grin spread across the admiral's features. "Oh, this is too good to be true," he murmured gleefully. "You really don't know, do you?" Certainly, he had heard it, but he hadn't believed it, not really—not until now. "Well, I won't deprive Malak the pleasure of telling you himself. The Dark Lord will no doubt torture you for information, and"—naturally—"for his own twisted pleasure, and eventually," he declared, "you will tell him everything.

"However," he continued thoughtfully, "Lord Malak is in another sector, so as it will be some time before he arrives, I suppose I will have to fill in for him." He waved a hand to a Sith in the corner. "Activate the torture fields."

It was like nothing Ashi had even known. The pain of all the various injuries she'd picked up in her quest, intensified by a thousand… but worse. Like being burned alive, but still living through every single horrible second. She knew she was screaming from the rawness in her throat, but it was impossible to even try to concentrate on anything. This wasn't just physical torture; it was in her head. Pain seared through her mind, ripping open fault lines like an earthquake. From each crack rose pictures and scenes, shoving for attention; in the confusion, she couldn't even remember if they were hers or not.

A tiny escape pod, spiraling to earth, and then a crash that shook the world, but suddenly_ she stood on the bridge of a ship, comprehension spinning through her mind, before everything dissolved suddenly into fire. Then_ the feeling of death and the dying everywhere, ripping through her skull like a jackhammer, which was _replaced by venom coursed through her, as cold as ice; first someone was there, but then_ she was alone, staggering, blood running down her shoulder…

That became dark mustiness of a tomb, and lightning coursing through her bones, all for the sake of someone who wanted her dead, but then worst of all,_ a Mandalorian blade through her stomach; the cold realization that she was going to die_…

She wished she _would_ die…

It was all the pain of her lifetime, and even someone else's, all tangled together. It seemed like forever that she burned alive, but finally she heard Saul mutter, "Enough," through the crackling energy of her torture field. "I don't want them to pass out before I can question them. Malak will appreciate any information I can give him when he arrives."

Carth's breathing was ragged, but he shook his head resolutely. "Don't waste your breath, Saul. We won't answer any of your questions."

"Oh, I'm sure _you_ won't," Saul replied disdainfully. "But we both know your friend's loyalties in the past have been proven… flexible."

Ashi, though trembling slightly, looked distinctly offended. "I'm as loyal as Carth!" she protested.

"Well," Saul smiled, "your loyalty is about to be tested."

"Terrifying," she drawled coolly. "Tell me, are you using the fields for torture, or were you just going to talk?"

A malicious grin grew like a weed across his face. "Oh, no. I doubt we will gain information by torturing you; your will is too strong. However, even the best of heroes have trouble watching those they care about suffer. The interrogation will begin now. Each time you refuse to answer, or lie, Carth will suffer."

It might have been the light, but Ashi seemed to pale. "Wait… no, no! Torture me instead. Don't hurt him!"

Through the bond, Bastila was panicking. _You see? Love is a weakness! They will use it against you!_

Carth caught her eye, and shook his head. "My pain is _meaningless_! Don't tell him anything!" He could see the look in Ashi's eyes, though, and knew enough to at least hope she had a plan. He gave her a tiny nod of understanding.

"I tire of these little games," Saul snapped. "Now I want _answers_. Where is the Jedi academy where you trained?"

Ashi hesitated, and Saul began to lift a hand to turn on the torture. "Alderaan!" she blurted. "It's on Alderaan! Please!" Normally, she wouldn't beg—if it was herself, she wouldn't dream of it—but this was different. This was Carth.

Saul's eyes flashed. "Alderaan?" he echoed mockingly. "Alderaan is a planet of philosophers and artists. If you plan to lie, do better than that." He nodded to the Sith. "The price of your resistance."

Carth's cries filled the room, and Ashi shut her eyes, unable to look and flooded with guilt. "I'm sorry!" she found herself mumbling, eyes closed tightly. "Carth, I'm so sorry…"

"See what happens when you defy me?" Saul spat. "Obviously, the question was a test. Malak knew that the academy was on Dantooine, and it has been destroyed. Dantooine is merely a graveyard now, with nothing there but a smoking ruin and the charred remains of your former masters!"

He flung the words at Ashi as if they should cause her infinite pain, but she shrugged blankly, mirroring his detachment. "Whatever. I _told _you that I'm not a Jedi."

Saul, despite the aloofness he wore like a mask, looked a bit disappointed at her reaction. "Well. The interrogation truly begins now. Tell me your mission. What are the Jedi having you do to stop Lord Malak and our Sith armada?"

It would hurt Carth more to tell him anything, she reminded herself. "No."

"Ah. Then perhaps you need a reminder of what happens when you refuse to cooperate?"

Again Carth screamed, and Ashi couldn't help crying out. "Stop!" she shouted, but Saul was cackling and didn't hear. "Stop it!"

This time he did pause, deactivating the torture and turning to face her with a cool shrug. "These are the consequences of your actions," he declared. "You could spare him further pain if you cooperate."

Ashi's face was suddenly uncertain, as she glanced over at Carth, but he scowled. "Tell him _nothing_!" he ordered, and his voice was so resolute and fierce that she couldn't object.

"I'm not telling you anything," she said again.

Saul seemed unsurprised, and motioned to the Sith. This time it must have been worse, for his cries were even louder, and after barely seconds, Ashi couldn't wait any longer.

"Stop! Stop it; I'll tell you!"

Surprised, Saul waved to the guard, and the torture stopped. "Very well, though," he added regretfully, "this has been most amusing. What is your mission? And bear in mind," he added darkly, "that you will only be further punished if you lie."

_Too late. _"We've been travelling to all the planets Revan and Malak went to. We're looking for a weakness from their past, something that we could use to defeat Malak."

Bastila looked confused, and Ashi glanced over at Carth. _Any time now…_

"_No!_"

His voice was so full of pain that Ashi almost believed it herself. "No, how could you? Don't tell him!"

"Where are you going now?" Saul demanded brusquely.

"Coruscant," Ashi invented. "We're going to the Republic there, we were going to try and find out about…"

"No!" Suddenly, Bastila had caught on. "Ashi, you cannot betray the Jedi like this!"

"I don't want them to hurt him!" she replied, voice trembling, and even Bastila found herself impressed.

"But your ship coordinates said you were going to Manaan," Saul observed, a note of skepticism still coloring his tone. "Why is that?"

Ashi frowned, feigning puzzlement. "Kolto, why else? The Mandalorian with us got badly wounded a little while ago, he has a limp now and I want to see if we can cure it…"

Saul surveyed her very closely for a minute, and Ashi was just wondering if their group lie had worked when he shook his head, chuckling quietly. "You should not have lied," he said. "That was a good attempt. Very convincing." He sighed resignedly. "We will get nothing from her. Activate the torture chambers."

The guard nodded, and the fiery pain overwhelmed Ashi, but this time it wasn't quite as bad. It was still better—very slightly better—than watching Carth suffer instead, and after some time, it all turned to black anyway.

* * *

When Ashi came to, eyes slowly tearing themselves open, a light was shining down on her. It was uncomfortably bright, and she lifted a weak hand to shield her face. She felt rather as if she had been chewed up by a rancor and spit out again.

"Ow," she managed, and then winced. Talking hurt.

"Don't try to…" Bastila began. She was interrupted as Ashi tried to sit and exclaimed, "Ow! _Dammit_!" before collapsing back to the cell floor.

"_Don't try to move too quickly_. You may not be fully recovered yet."

"Oh, right: _may_ not?"

"Admiral Karath had his guards continue to torture you even after you passed out," Bastila explained. Ashi, glancing over without moving her head, could have sworn she sounded almost sympathetic.

Carth nodded, and there was no questioning the concern in his face. "He tortured all of us, but you got the worst of it by far."

"Lucky me," she muttered, now making her best attempt not to move at all.

"He wanted to make us all suffer," Carth continued, ignoring her mutter of, 'Well, it worked.' "He's become some sort of sadistic monster."

"Once you start down the tainted path, it leads you ever further into the depths of evil," Bastila replied. "The dark side has perverted him."

"You said it," Ashi threw in. "I mean"—and here she risked raising a hand to gesture at herself—"underwear and everything."

There was a pause, and then Carth snorted, halfway to a laugh; but Bastila glared at Ashi, obviously considering herself mocked. "I_ fear_," she continued adamantly, "he is forever lost."

Fractionally, Ashi raised an eyebrow. "But I thought no one was without hope of redemption," she challenged.

Bastila stared at her for a long moment, her gaze unreadable. Just as Ashi was beginning to feel uncomfortable under her stare, however, the Jedi sighed. "Yes… you are correct," she admitted tiredly. "Sometimes it is easy to lose sight of that hope in the face of such unbridled cruelty. I suppose," she continued, speculation mingling with sorrow in her voice, "I am simply taking the news of Dantooine quite hard. First Taris, now the academy… is there no end to the killing?"

"Uh, no?" Ashi offered. "They're Sith, remember?"

Bastila looked somewhat put out at her indifference. "I would like to believe that he is lying, but as he spoke the words, I knew it was the truth," she pressed on. "We should have felt a disturbance in the Force. The fact that we didn't is a bad sign. I fear the dark side is growing stronger, casting shadows our vision cannot pierce."

For a moment, she abandoned the smooth, emotionless expression, looking genuinely sad. "Our one place of refuge in the galaxy is gone." Ashi almost felt bad, and so she bit her tongue to keep from adding it wasn't _her_ place of refuge.

"None of that will matter," Carth interrupted sharply, "if we don't get out of this prison before Saul gets back."

"Right." Ashi frowned uncertainly. "Where'd he go, anyway?"

"He said Malak was coming. I think he left to prepare for his arrival, and report the results of our interrogation."

For the first time, Bastila looked pleased. "It is fortunate that you were able to resist the admiral's questioning. The fate of the galaxy could have been changed by revealing the slightest piece of information."

Carth cleared his throat. "I… I have to confess something. There was a moment—just a moment," he added quickly, "where part of me was hoping you would tell him what he wanted to know. Just to make the horrible pain stop."

Rubbing her forehead, Ashi glared. "Oh, thanks. Not like I was already feeling guilty or anything." She looked away, casting her eyes down. "Look, I'm sorry, Carth. It was… I didn't want him to hurt you, but he would have tortured us anyway…"

He shook his head immediately. "No, no, I know you would never intentionally cause me pain. You had no other choice, you couldn't betray our cause." He stopped, and added slowly, "I don't know if I could have been as strong as you. Seeing you suffer like that… I might have cracked."

Ashi looked back up at him, trying to figure out whether that had been a compliment. Their eyes met for a moment, but it was sharply interrupted as a flash of pain cleaved through her head like lightning. She cried out, pressing a hand to her temple.

"A disturbance in the Force," Bastila murmured ominously. "Admiral Karath has sent his message. The Dark Lord knows we are here now. Malak is coming."

"Well, then we better hope Dustil and Mission get us out of here before he arrives."

No sooner had Carth finished speaking, though, than they heard voices outside. The door shuddered violently, as if being kicked.

"I can't open it!"

"No, you can't," replied Mission matter-of-factly. "The security's, like, wired into the mainframe. This stuff's top notch. Looks like the Sith are about as paranoid as your dad." Both Dustil and Ashi laughed, before Carth gave her a reproachful look.

"It's still not open," the boy remarked, after a pause.

"I'm hacking, I'm hacking! Jeez! Give me a sec, Sithboy!"

And all she needed was a second, too. The next moment the door slid open, and both Mission and Dustil burst in, looking incredibly proud of themselves. "About time," muttered Ashi, but she couldn't hide a proud grin.

Mission suddenly paled as soon as she took in the cages. "They _tortured_ you?"

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "And you're surprised?"

Dustil didn't look as shocked as Mission, but he grimaced guiltily. Ashi didn't need to be a genius to figure out what was running through his head—he probably had enough experience with this. Luckily, Mission quickly headed to the controls, deactivating the cages with a few quick taps.

As the glimmer from the shields faded, all their burns were thrown into sharper relief. Ashi was obviously the worst: merciless wounds laced her body, a vicious, angry red. Paired with her many silver-dark scars—the largest two being the hive kinrath's slash across her collarbone, and the starburst on her back—it was enough to draw flinches from all of them. She stumbled as she tried to stand, but Carth hurried over, wrapping an arm around her to help her up. She leaned against him, breathing hard for a moment, before pressing a hand to her raw cheek and closing her eyes.

Ribbons of light rippled instantaneously over her body, and then she straightened, healed. Quickly, she did the same to Carth; Bastila took care of herself. Satisfied, Ashi turned to Mission and Dustil.

"Can you find everyone else?" she asked, and their nods were immediate. "Good. Then we'll go to the Hawk and get out of here before…"

Mission, at the keyboard, shook her head. "Can't, Ash. The hangar's locked, and it only opens from the bridge deck. They're better than I thought." She tapped a couple more keys, and then shrugged apologetically. "I can't reroute it. Sorry."

"Right." Ashi nodded, taking it in stride. "Okay—new job for you guys. Find all the rest of the crew, and get to the Hawk. You're going to have a lot of security and guards on you, but all you guys together can handle that. We'll get to the bride, disable the security, and get out of here."

Again, both teens nodded instantly, understanding the importance of their job. "Got it," Mission beamed, and then darted forward to hug Ashi. "Good luck, Ash."

Ashi hugged the younger girl back warmly. "Take care of yourself, kid," she warned, grinning. "There's going to be serious trouble if you don't come back."

"I'll take care of her," Dustil threw in, and Mission pulled back to elbow him playfully.

"Good luck, you guys!" she chirped again, and then they were gone, eagerness sending them flying out the doors. Thoughts of torture were forgotten; they were young, and they were important, and there was a plan: everything was all right.

The other three grabbed their clothes and weapons easily—the Sith apparently weren't very good with hiding things—and began to make their way carefully through the halls. They had just reached the elevator when Ashi's communicator began to vibrate.

"It's Canderous," said a gruff voice. "We're on the hangar level. Like we figured, it's under heavy guard, but we've got a plan to take care of them."

"What kind of plan?"

There was a pause, and then sudden, static-filled gunfire exploded from the background, accompanied by a shriek of, "Exclamation: die, Sith meatbags!"

"Oh." She nodded evenly. "Okay. You're in charge, Ordo—don't you dare let anyone get hurt."

"Good luck, Lucas," he replied, and then he cut the link.

* * *

The main deck was easy enough to fight their way through. Unfortunately, the same could not be said for getting to the actual bridge. There was no way through the ship that they could take without being caught… the key phrase being 'through the ship'.

It was a very new experience for Ashi to be pulling herself along the edge of a massive ship, teetering suicidally close to the empty, endless abyss of space. It was also utterly terrifying, when that one slip could send her veering off to her death, not to mention the fact that she could feel Bastila's fear as well. However, for once, they were in agreement. Carth wasn't at all bothered—evidently, Republic training covered this kind of thing—and the other two were fiercely determined to hide their actual fear from him.

It was a long, painstaking journey. Every time a Sith fighter whizzed by, like a gnat near a bantha, they would all flinch, but none of them stopped, and after an eternity of clinging to the handholds with panicked, bulky hands, they were at the other door. Ashi wasn't the only one eager to get the thick, unwieldy suit off, and they left them near the airlock for their journey back. A group of Sith were caught completely off guard as the three of them broke into the ship, but their surprise was distinctly short-lived. Leaving the bodies, Ashi and her friends made their way to the bridge deck. As they drew nearer, Carth looked more and more impatient—after all, he was moments from his revenge.

There was no point in subtlety any more. The door hissed open, and all the Sith stared at Ashi and her friends as they walking in, weapons ready and completely unafraid. "Very resourceful," observed Saul, speaking directly to Carth. "I assume you had some part in this. You learned your lessons well from me."

Carth glared. "The only thing you taught me was betrayal and death, Saul!"

"Don't be a fool," he snapped. "I'm giving you and your companions a chance to surrender… a chance to live. Darth Malak himself is on his way."

"He speaks the truth," Bastila added tremulously. "I can feel the Dark Lord's presence approaching."

"He will destroy you," Saul said softly, eyes darkening, and there was nothing but the truth in his words. "But if you throw down your weapons now, perhaps I will ask my master to be merciful."

But Carth shook his head, face set determinedly. "I've seen enough of Sith mercy!" he growled.

"You always did like to do things the hard way. Lord Malak would have preferred live prisoners, but I suppose," Saul snarled, drawing his blaster, "that corpses will have to do!"

At a sudden signal, all the Sith in the bridge attacked. Ashi and Bastila reacted simultaneously, throwing up Force shields that took the majority of the damage. In the single moment of peace before all hell broke loose, Ashi barked, "Bastila, take the soldiers. I've got the dark Jedi. Saul's yours, Carth."

Then the shields went down, and they lunged.

There were at least three dark Jedi, and all of them good fighters. Ashi found herself in the middle of them, ducking and spinning in a blaze of violet as she took them slowly apart. It wasn't the best of positions, but none of them were as good as Bandon, and she didn't have it the worst. Bastila was racing around the bridge to the soldiers, all of whom sent an unending stream of grenades and blaster bolts flying at her. Energy and Force shields took the worst of it, but she was still hard-pressed. _In fact_, Ashi realized dryly, _Carth has it easiest of all. _In a way, she and Bastila were taking the brunt of the fight so he could get payback.

Two of the dark Jedi had fallen, but a Sith with a vibroblade had joined the fight. Ashi had tried to use the Force to speed her movements, but was beginning to slow nevertheless. It must have been seven in the morning now, by her body clock, and she had been awake since midnight—she was exhausted.

She stumbled back, trying to heal a wound that burned across her ribs, and the dark Jedi's blade seared a painful slash across her shoulder. Ashi was beginning to wonder if they could have bitten off more that she could chew, when suddenly, Saul fell.

Just like that, the tide turned. Carth spun and disabled two of the troopers in as many shots, and then Bastila decapitated the final dark Jedi with a flash of her lightsaber. Ashi ran her blade through the soldier's stomach, and turned to her friends, giving them a worn grin that was mirrored in each of their faces.

Carth jerked his head, indicating the computer panel, and she hurried over, passing the fallen body of the admiral. It was only then that she heard his shallow breathing, faint and excruciating as it grated against his throat.

"He's still alive!" she exclaimed, and in a moment Carth had his blaster out and aimed.

"Carth…" Saul choked. "_Carth…_"

Carth stared coldly. "It's time to finish this."

Never before that moment had Ashi seen the dark side in someone she knew. In Sith, certainly, in places like Korriban, certainly, but she had never seen true evil in someone she cared about. Carth's face was twisted in hatred, his eyes burned with vindictive ruthlessness, and he was about to shoot an old man—an evil, merciless bastard, but still an old man—who lay helpless on the ground. It was wrong.

"No!" she protested, grabbing his arm. "No, Carth, don't do it!"

He turned to look at her, his gaze like tundra blown flat and merciless by the wind. "Don't you understand what this man has done to my life?" he breathed. "Do you know the pain he's brought me?"

_Yes—yes, and I hate him for that…_ "I know," Ashi replied, through gritted teeth, "but killing him won't make the pain better, will it? Don't go down to his level!"

"Carth…" mumbled Saul, and broke off to cough. Blood splattered his chin. "Must… must tell you something… Come closer…"

Carth paused, and then lowered his blaster. He paced closer and knelt hesitantly beside the older man who had mentored him a lifetime ago. Saul murmured something, so softly that Ashi could hardly even make out his voice, but whatever it was, the volume didn't matter. Carth visibly recoiled as if slapped, his face shocked. Saul cackled.

"You didn't know… did you? Ha, ha, ha…" He convulsed, the laughter switching abruptly to wracking coughs, but somehow cruelty spurred him to force out the rest of his sentence. "Remember my dying words… whenever you look at… her… those you thought… were your friends…"

Saul choked suddenly, and then fell still. He was dead.

Carth straightened, his breathing rapid and horrified. To Ashi's surprise, he spun to face her. "No," he murmured. "No, it can't be true… no… damn you, Saul! _Damn you!_"

"Carth, calm down," she said slowly. "He's just trying to get to you. It's not…"

But when Carth turned to stare at her, it was with such fury that Ashi was stunned into silence. This was a look of pure loathing—the look he had previously reserved for Saul alone. Her breath caught in her throat. _What did I do?_

"Bastila," snarled Carth—although the look that accompanied her name was still not quite so vicious as Ashi's—"it is true, isn't it? And you and all the damn Jedi Council, you knew all the time!"

"Carth, it's not what you think!" Bastila cried fearfully. "We had no choice! Please, you don't understand!" Their Force bond was suddenly closed off, like a brick wall in the way. Bastila was blocking Ashi—whatever Saul had said, the Jedi knew it too, and it was about her…

"So make me understand!"

"What?" demanded Ashi desperately, feeling like a child shut out of an adult's conversation. "What are you talking about?"

Bastila gave her a frantic sideways glance. "_Not here_, Carth! Malak is coming; this isn't the place! Please, you need to trust me for just a little while longer!"

"Trust you?" Carth scoffed harshly. "I'll come with you. But as soon as we're on the ship, I want some answers."

"Of course! Of course. But we have to go now! I can feel Malak's presence…"

Bastila broke off, but there was no need to continue. Ashi could feel it too, like a giant icy hand clenching on her heart. "What's going _on_?" she broke in angrily.

"Yes, yes… answers for both of you, I promise. But we have to go!"

Bastila had enough of a point. Ashi raced to the console, disabling the security in moments, and then suggested, "Force speed?"

The Jedi nodded. Ashi held out her hand to Carth, but to her shock and hurt he gave it a single look of disgust and turned away. Ashi fought down a wave of hurt. What was wrong? Pointedly, he took Bastila's hand instead, and ignoring the sudden pricking in her eyes—space, don't let me cry _now_, please, not _now_—Ashi began to run.

Just as they reached the hangar, after a relatively calm trip through the Sith ship, Ashi's communicator buzzed. "It's Canderous again," said the Mandalorian, the moment she picked up. "We're in the Hawk, and all systems are online. Ready to leave when you are."

"Got it. On our way," Ashi nodded, and continued down the hall. There were a couple rooms with Sith guards, but the majority of the area was clear—the rest of the crew had done their job well. She spotted several corpses that had definitely been subject to a flamethrower, and almost smiled, but then snapped back to the mission when a window to the hangar caught her gaze. The Ebon Hawk sat in the clear: a couple more steps, and they would be there.

But then the cold hand clenched tighter on her heart, and she gasped aloud. In a moment, she knew that Malak had arrived.

"We have to…" she whispered, struggling to breath against the cold fear rising in her chest.

"Go!" Bastila finished frantically, and Ashi raced for the blast door.

* * *

**Yes, it is a cliffhanger. I expect everyone to know what's coming (although if you don't, I'm honored to be breaking it to you). Reviews, believe it or not, actually do make me update faster, so if you need to know what happens next...**


	22. Revelation

**Huge thanks for all the reviews--do I even need to mention how happy they make me? Hopefully you've been waiting in suspense. Humor me, anyway. And because I'm not completely evil, I won't keep you waiting any more.

* * *

Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR

* * *

**

**Revelation:** **something revealed or divulged, esp. a striking disclosure, as of something not before realized**

The gray-red metal parted before them with a hiss, in time for Ashi and her friends to skid to a frantic halt. He was already there, waiting for them.

"Malak," Bastila breathed in horror.

"Really?" asked Ashi dryly. "Was it the jaw that gave it away?" It was stupid to be sarcastic _now_, and she knew it, but she still didn't know what Saul had told Carth, and they had been so close to escape a moment ago. She was angry… no, scratch that. She was furious.

Malak turned his harsh gaze from Bastila to her, his yellow eyes flashing. "I see you've still got your sense of humor," he observed metallically.

Carth and Bastila went pale, two ghosts that stood frozen as the world continued to move. Ashi frowned. "Uh, sorry," she offered, "I don't think we've met." Then, to everyone's surprise, she grinned. "Malak, right? I'm Ashi." She smiled—it had a razor edge to it—and shifted her weight imperceptibly; by her side, her fingers were drifting gradually towards her lightsaber.

The Sith Lord shook his head. "No, you're not," he rasped, and to Ashi's surprise, he mirrored her movements, reading her perfectly.

"_Yes_, I _am_," she insisted. "I think I know my own _name_."

She was stunned, as, unexpectedly, he began to shake with horrible, mechanical laughter. "You really don't know, do you?" he chuckled. "All this time… all these little hints… I thought that you were smarter than that."

Ashi seemed to notice, quite suddenly, the matching expressions of terror on her crewmates' faces. "That's it!" she snapped, stamping her foot in frustration. "What the hell is it that all of you aren't telling me?"

Malak smirked—or appeared to, for it was hard to tell with his jaw in the way. "You truly haven't figured it out yet?" He raised a hand and snapped his wrist outwards, throwing Carth and Bastila across the room. Both scrabbled to their feet instantaneously, but Malak's fingers clenched ever so slightly, and they found their throats closing with his fist, leaving no air for words.

He took a couple steps closer, only feet away as he met Ashi's gaze. His eyes were fire and ice, hatred and mockery and yet despite it all, she stared back, sure he could not touch her.

She was wrong.

"I would have hoped I was a _little_ more memorable than that," murmured the Sith Lord softly, "_love_."

Time froze.

The world stopped, the single moment of calm between the spark and the fire, and then shattered with an explosion that made no noise at all. Every gaze in the room was riveted to Ashi's face, every person caught their breath for a moment as her eyes widened, glassy and horrified. Her lips fell open, the smallest gasp slipping from behind them. Instead of Malak before her, disjointed images rushed past her eyes, pieces forming a terrible but familiar puzzle. She had been stabbed, and the words were sharper than knives and a thousand times crueler, twisting deep within her chest until something inside her splintered and gave completely.

…_The two of them as children, playing together on Dantooine…_

…_Him healing her after the crystal cave, and their kiss in the field…_

…_Wonderful, dependable Alek—who somehow shifted into a darker person, Malak—as he followed her into the war without a second thought, because he trusted her so damn completely…_

…_The injustice, the burning anger, that slowly built up in them, ever deeper, as they saw how corrupt the people they fought to protect really were…_

…_The quest for the Star Forge, to rule the galaxy, because they knew that they could do it so much better… because they were _worthy_…_

"_I would follow you anywhere, Revan."_

She remembered. She remembered _everything_. The images she'd seen of the little Jedi girl with Alek and her flashes of Revan all suddenly wove together into one person... that was her_—her_! It was dizzying, to look so objectively at her own life. She was a smuggler, wasn't she?

No… she was a child, far too talented for her own good, who'd trained as a Jedi on Dantooine; she was a proud, righteous Sentinel who went off to fight in the war; she was the Dark Lord who tried to rule the galaxy…

_She'd been the Dark Lord. _ That was a concept that needed a whole new train of thought, it was so incredible and impossible. Hell, this whole thing needed a long, quiet year or so of speculation, but she didn't have any time now. _Pull yourself together_, she instructed determinedly. The galaxy was exploding, or maybe imploding—either way, her world was still falling to pieces—but damned if she was going to fall apart in front of Malak… or Alek. _Space._

He was still there, gazing down at her with delight. Bastila leapt to her feet, her expression terrified; Ashi saw it as if in slow motion. There was no need to ask if this was true, to beg Bastila to deny it. The brat's face only confirmed what she had already known.

But the Jedi, they had known too. Why hadn't they killed her? Why hadn't they let her die, if she was so goddamn evil?

The Star Forge.

Everything clicked, and Ashi snapped. Her expression, forcibly calm a moment ago, contorted with rage. Malak's smile twisted gleefully, even though she shoved him away, as he caught sight of a flicker of yellow in her eyes. "_You_," she said, her tone brimming with unbridled fury, pointing an accusing finger at Bastila. "You, and the whole fracking Council, you used me!"

Bastila stuttered, but her denial wavered and died behind her lips. Ashi took a deep breath, her fingertips beginning to spark with electricity as Force lightning came back, oh so naturally. "I was your good little brainwashed Sith Lord, wasn't I?" she demanded, her voice rising. "Your little pawn, set out on my little mission to do your every fracking whim, wasn't I?" Her eyes, now undeniably gold-tinged, sparkled with rage, and the Jedi was almost too petrified to reply.

"An important mission," she mumbled pathetically. "To destroy the Star Forge."

"You… you admitted it!" exclaimed Ashi, voice rising, as Bastila cowered and Malak watched eagerly. Here was the Revan he knew; this was the person he had fallen in love with. He had wondered what this new Revan would be like, but the answer seemed to be 'a lot like the old one'.

"I am a person!" Ashi screeched. "Not a droid, not something you can program just to go do your fracking will!"

Malak looked as though if he had had a mouth, it would have been grinning. Ashi, her eyes still fixed directly on Bastila's, raised a hand that crackled with lightning. The Jedi flinched, and closed her eyes against the torture that she was sure would come.

It didn't.

Cautiously Bastila cracked open one eye, and then the other. Ashi stood there—that was to say, there was no doubt that this was Ashi. She was breathing heavily, her face pale and appalled. To Bastila's relief, her hand was back at her side, clenched in a tight fist. She shook her head slowly, stubbornly. Finally one eye opened to focus on her friends again; her expression was pained, but the Jedi and the soldier saw with deep relief that her eyes were back to their usual blue.

"Space," murmured Ashi finally, the shock in her voice brutally sincere, and Carth had to force back a shadow of sympathy. _She doesn't deserve it_, he reminded himself fiercely. "I… Bastila, I'm sorry," Ashi murmured. "I didn't mean to…it's just…" She hesitated, eyes bouncing wildly from face to face. "You lied to me," she said brokenly. "You knew it this whole time, and you've been using me; you've been lying to me about my _life_, about who I _am_! What the frack am I supposed to do?"

"_Stop!_" said Carth unexpectedly.

It was the first time he'd spoken since Malak had arrived, and everyone turned to stare at him, Bastila looking grateful but the Sith angry. "What?" mumbled Ashi, as if she hadn't quite understood.

"I said, stop!" Carth replied, his voice stronger and surer this time. "It's not our fault. _We're_ not your enemies, Ashi!"

Ashi blinked, staring at him in disbelief. "You're right," she whispered, and then again, "You're _right_," the words surer the second time. For a moment, she was still, and then anger began to creep again across her face; to Carth and Bastila's relief, however, it was not at them. "They're not my enemies." She wasn't speaking to them any more, they realized, as she turned slowly to face Malak, disgust and lucidity and equal in her eyes.

"You fired on my ship!" she accused, as if the thought had just occurred to her. "You were my fracking best friend, and you tried to kill me!"

Malak looked vaguely sheepish; this was the anger his Revan was known for, and no one liked to be on the receiving end of it. He regained his composure quickly, though, shaking his head. "You know as well as I, Revan, that it was what had to be done. The apprentice must kill the master when they have surpassed them in strength."

"Strength?" snapped Ashi incredulously. "This wasn't a matter of fracking strength! That was a backstabbing, underhanded way for you to get rid of me, without actually having to fight me—let me guess: because you knew you'd lose, right?"

Despite himself, Carth was grinning as the current Sith Lord cringed under Ashi's anger. "What's the matter?" she pressed, smiling mockingly. "Upset because I'm _right _that you couldn't beat me fairly? Well, yeah, I always was stronger, wasn't I?"

"No!" roared Malak, straightening up. He towered over Ashi, although to her credit she did not flinch. "I was stronger, Revan. You knew that."

Ashi rolled her eyes, waving a hand dismissively. "Nah. In a brains versus brawn sense, maybe, but if you really want to rule the galaxy, you need to be smart too. Which, by the way, if you were, you'd give up right now."

Malak glared. "Enough!" he exploded, in a voice like a hammer blow. "I'm not the one who should be afraid, Revan. You see, I've only grown stronger since your fall, and you've only grown weaker. You are no match for me."

Carth watched, and was struck by a sense of déjà vu as Ashi's face slipped into an all-too-familiar scowl. It was a look that appeared on her face sometimes when talking to him, whenever he accidentally offended her. Malak's face was hard to read, but Carth though it might be an expression that he ought to know as well, a face that a lot of people made when they realized they had made Ashi angry. It was a face that suggested the person was thinking something like, _oh. Damn._ And Malak looked a hell of a lot like he was thinking that, as Ashi flicked on her lightsaber, the purple beam flashing dangerously, and hissed, "It's Ashi, bastard. And I'm _not_ weak."

She was breathing through her teeth, but added a frightening smile. "You can't beat me, Malak, and we both know it."

His gold eyes narrowing chillingly as, with a hiss of electricity, he drew his own lightsaber. "You are weak, Revan: a pawn of the Jedi, a servant of the light! How could you possibly triumph?"

"Like hell I am!" snapped Ashi. "I'm not a Jedi—and at least I'm not a Sith who was _scared _to fight their master!"

"The Jedi Council were foolish to let you live," he snarled. "I won't make the same mistake as before. We'll finish this alone, Revan: master versus apprentice, as it was meant to be!"

A wave of his hand, and Carth and Bastila froze in stasis fields, too suddenly for them to even look surprised. Carth felt horror flood through him as his muscles grew still and unyielding. There was nothing worse than to be needed and yet to not be able to fight. Ironic, really, that he should be helpless, when before him were the two people, Saul excluded, that he hated most in the galaxy. Could he have moved, he wasn't completely sure who he would have aimed for first.

There was a final moment of silence, and then both Ashi and Malak suddenly darted forward, clashing lightsabers in a flurry of red and violet. She was forced to leap back quickly, though, as he overpowered her. Physically, he was stronger—but, then again, she was stronger in the Force.

Slashing her hand outward, she flung him back into the wall, but he recovered quickly and rushed her. She darted to the side, and spun, her lightsaber slashing across his arm. He grimaced, but then, with a snap of his wrist in her direction, established a sudden string of reddish light between them. Carth and Bastila watched in horror as his wound healed over, and Ashi stumbled, suddenly drained of strength. "I've picked up a few new tricks," said the Sith smugly, stepping back, circling slowly to the side.

_Yeah, I know—feel the power of the dark side and all that._ "Hmm. Excuse me if I don't clap," she muttered. There was a flash of blue—instantaneous, given the little time she had to spare—and then she was back on her feet, grinning. "And I've picked up a couple tricks, too. If memory serves, you used to be able to do that."

"Ah, yes. _If memory serves_, I even saved your life. How foolish," he mused coldly, taking another step to the side as he shifted his weight slowly.

She snorted. "Well, people do stupid things out of love, don't they?"

If Carth had been able to move, he would have frowned in confusion at her words. Malak, however, looked thrown by the reference of the past. "Not anymore," he growled, thrusting his lightsaber at her. She dodged, and the battle resumed. Ashi was fighting fiercely, but although she was strong, his massive physical strength was overwhelming, and she was resorting to speed rather than force to land several small attacks.

Malak was stunned, watching her fight. Even the full efforts of the Council couldn't hold back her natural talent. Panic began to rush through him as they fought, dancing back and forth in a blaze of light. She was amazing: driven by anger but using it levelheadedly, landing small attacks on him that hurt like hell, each one weakening him a little more—and she was far too fast, giving him no time to recover. A sudden parry slashed through the space where he had been a moment ago, and he swore under his breath.

Damn—she was still better.

And somehow, he couldn't stand the thought of killing her, face to face, so much more personally than when he had fired on her ship. Then, it hadn't even felt like he knew her anymore. Somehow, inexplicably, she was so much more his Revan now, her fighting and her temper the same, her memories restored. She had a single thought in mind, a single desire to defeat him, and it was just what he remembered—too much so. This was his best friend trying to kill him.

Malak felt his breath freeze for a moment as a flash of purple nearly took off his hand. He had to focus. She obviously wasn't busy mulling over any feelings for him, and he could afford his enemies no sympathy.

He kicked her in the stomach, and she staggered, parrying weakly as he followed up with a flurry of slashes. One nearly took her arm off when her defense slipped for a moment, but this was Revan, and she never gave up without a fight. Flinging him back with a Force wave, she quickly healed herself—because he might be fighting every second for his life, but _she_ had all the time in the world; fact, not arrogance—and went flying for him, the battle resuming again in an instant.

She was almost feral, as she slashed and spun with an amazing ferocity. He could half-sense her strategies as they fought, see her every move before it came. He knew her so well, even after the year apart. Revan, after all was unique. She was too… wonderful to be killed, to die at anyone's hand. Revan, who had never met her match. No one could stop her.

Malak was weakening, and he knew it, too. The effects of fighting Revan were taking their toll, not to mention the stasis fields, against which both her friends were fighting, even the pilot. He was strong, for a non-Force-user, Malak would give him that. A drop of sweat rolled along the Dark Lord's face as he realized he couldn't hold the battle much longer. And then, with a stunned horror, he felt a low kick knock his feet from under him, and his lightsaber flew, tugged by invisible hands, from his grip.

Revan stood over him, her lightsaber poised. Would she kill him? It wouldn't be so bad, he realized. Killed by Darth Revan—well, it wasn't as if he would be the only one. And she was the stronger one. She always had been.

She was still there, the lightsaber trembling ever so slightly now. Her eyes were filled with pain and memories, and of course, he knew what she was thinking. They really were ironically close, that they were torn in the same goddamn indecision. "Can't do it, can you?" he said, a smirk in his voice rather than on his face. "Can't kill me, huh, Red?"

She stiffened at the name, and he sensed an advantage. Throwing out a hand, he lifted her off the ground, trapping her in midair. Leaving her spinning, he half-stumbled up, racing into the next room. The moment the door clanked shut, he released the stasis field on her friends, and then smiled as new strength flowed back into him.

Revan—_Revan_, not Red—would come, now, but this time he was ready. He took a deep breath and then exhaled, and with the breath, his compassion left him. She must die. Such was the way of the Sith.

Carth bristled, immediately alert, as the stasis lifted, and his gaze turned directly to Ashi. He was stunned at her uncertainty, her moment of weakness. What could possibly make her hesitate, right when she was about to kill Malak and end it all?

_Maybe_, whispered part of him, _she's still evil; she's not sure which of you to side with. _But he couldn't see her dark side, not in her words and not in her face now as she spun helplessly, trying to free herself from Malak's desperate attack.

Finally, like a falling leaf caught on a breeze, she drifted to the ground and, to his and Bastila's surprise, ignored them completely. Her face was set and furious, although it seemed more directed at herself than any of them. She stormed up to the door, and it sprang open obediently. Before they could stop her, she was gone.

Malak watched the door slide open and then slam behind her as Ashi entered, her face unreadable. He shifted into a fighting stance, and beckoned her forward. As if intent on making up her weakness, she attacked with new fury.

But anger made her careless. He spun and kicked her hard in the jaw, hearing a satisfying crack as his booted foot connected with her face. Ashi stumbled, and before she could recover, she felt her throat contract.

Eyes darting up, she found Malak with one hand outstretched, closing slowly and purposefully on open air. She wheezed frantically, clutching at her neck, as she began to choke under his grip that was just as strong as his hand would have been. With forcible resolve, she concentrated, reaching for the Force, and then shoved him off. For a moment, she was left helpless, gasping for breath; seconds later, however, she realized it had been far too long. For Malak, the single moment of vulnerability had been enough. He threw her across the room—with a sickening crack and flash of pain, her head snapped back against the wall—and before she could recover, his lightsaber was at her throat.

A very loud silence descended suddenly over both of them. Malak stared, unable to believe his eyes. It occurred to him, the thought tentative and unreal, that it would be so easy to kill her.

She looked back at him, her eyes deep and blue like he remembered in the beginning. Blood ran down her cheek, bright scarlet against her paling skin: her entire face was nothing but vivid color, patched together by the same defiant stare she had wielded against the Mandalorians. Years had done nothing to change it, in looks or the spirit itself. How unfair that she stayed so goddamn gorgeous, and he ended up mutilated.

She fixed him with a gaze that was not angry like he expected—like he wished it would be; after a moment he realized he had been praying for anger, simply so he could return it. She didn't look furious now, she looked completely apathetic, and it hit him like a freight train. After a moment, a wry smile cracked its way across her lips.

"I guess it's my turn to try to kill you and screw it up, huh?"

He was taken aback by her indifference; it showed on his half-metal face, and he hesitated. "No—do it," she offered, straight-faced. "It'd be kind. Save me from having to live with myself now."

Malak stared at her, but she looked utterly serious. "It's almost funny, actually," she added, with a humorless laugh. "Mercy from a Sith Lord, right in the middle of his revenge."

Still he hesitated, the lightsaber humming against her light skin, dying it an eerie red. "Well?" she murmured quietly, and _damn_, her voice might as well have been chains around his arms, for how it held him in place, unable to go either forward or back. "Can you do it, either?"

He froze.

_Could he?_

"Go on," she said slowly. "If you can. But I don't think you will, will you?"

A challenge. She was challenging him, and now the truth was her weapon now and not his, and she could see through him like glass. He was transparent under her eyes, and suddenly he remembered why he had fired from so far away, why he wouldn't fight her face to face. They were stuck in a goddamn equilibrium: both each other's only obstacle, and both unable to deal the final blow.

Outside, Carth had heard the shouts and sounds of battle, and Ashi's cry of pain. Now he heard the silence, which was even worse. "Hurry!" he muttered to Bastila, who was struggling to Force the lock open.

"I'm hurrying!" she snapped, as the door flew open. Ashi was pressed against the wall, blood trickling down her cheek and covered in wounds, but no pain showed in her expression. Her face was questioning: she looked curious.

Carth would have puzzled over her expression, as she had a lightsaber at her throat, but he was distracted by Malak, with one hand holding the weapon to her neck and the other trapping her against the wall. He was almost pressed up against her, only his eyes betraying his uncertainty. It changed to rage in an instant, however, as he saw them enter. He backhanded Ashi across the face, and she stumbled—more from surprise, than anything else—and fell. As she hit the ground, he spun to face the two of them.

"This isn't over, Malak!" exclaimed Bastila.

"Hell, no, it's not," Ashi mumbled, through dazed lips, as she attempted to pull herself up. Carth ran forward to grab her unceremoniously, dragging her to her feet. Malak wasn't looking at him, though: he stared instead at Bastila, with disgust if not total surprise.

"Your friends do not give up easily, Revan," he observed bitterly. "You always could inspire loyalty. But even the three of you together cannot stand against my power!"

Instinctively, Carth glanced around, sizing up the odds. Ashi was down for now, he wouldn't be much good against a blaster-bolt-deflecting Jedi, and Bastila wasn't a fighter to equal Malak, though she was the best shot they had right now.

"For the Jedi!" she cried, just as he thought it, and rushed at Malak, her golden blade rushing through the air like a scythe. He parried, forcing her back, and she shot Carth and Ashi a worried look, shoving them towards the exit with the Force.

"I'll hold Malak off. You two get out of here! Find the Star Forge!" she instructed, her words running together in their hurry. Ashi seemed less stunned now, and rushed towards Bastila, but Carth dragged her back, and the door slammed with finality behind them.

A second later, she tore herself lose from Carth's grip and scrambled up to the door, banging on it desperately. She tried to Force it open, but couldn't, and resorted to trying to pry the doors apart with her bare hands. Carth grabbed her arm.

"Stop!" he shouted, grabbing her arm. "Bastila's sacrificed herself for us. We have to get out of here, she won't last long against Malak."

Ashi spun to look at him, their faces inches apart. He gazed into her eyes, and was shocked by the emotion there. Her entire face was filled with unmistakable guilt.

"You think that I don't know that?" she demanded. "You think I don't know she's going to die for me? She shouldn't!" she cried, tears beginning to run down her cheeks, mingling with the blood to form streams of red. "She's not supposed to die! I'm Revan, idiot, or did you miss that?" She jerked away sharply, backing towards the door. "Malak should kill me instead!" she insisted, her voice breaking halfway through.

Carth's hand closed suddenly on her shoulder, yanking her back. "No! Whether or not I agree"—for a moment, Ashi froze; it was official: words could hurt more than blows—"Bastila's made her choice, and we can't throw away her sacrifice. We need to get to the Ebon Hawk. Everyone's waiting—they need us too."

Ashi opened her mouth to object, and then glanced at the door, behind which she could hear the fight, the sizzling clash of lightsabers, and the occasional cry of pain. She hesitated a moment, face agonized in indecision, and then turned and ran. Carth, guilt weighing a little heavier on his shoulders with every step, followed.

* * *

The rest of the crew was waiting on the Hawk as the two entered in a clatter of footsteps. They immediately burst into a flood of questions, but the loudest of all was Mission's anxious, "What's wrong?"

_Everything, _Ashi thought, but she brushed them off. "Controls, Carth, Jolee," she said, her voice a monotone. "We need to go." They stared at her, and she took a shaky breath. "_Go!_" she repeated sharply, and they hurried to the cockpit.

The Ebon Hawk juddered to a start and pulled away from the hangar. Sith fighters followed them, but Canderous took care of them easily, although he seemed to find far more opportunities to swear in Mandalorian than were strictly necessary. However, they had little choice but him for the job. Ashi was in no condition to fight now—as soon as Carth left the room, she fell into one of the chairs, staring blankly at the floor. Her face was emotionless, eyes flat and dim as empty mirrors.

They made an easy escape, and soon the ship was in hyperspace, en route to Manaan. As soon as they were safe, Carth and Jolee rejoined the rest of the group in the central room. Ashi didn't seem to notice them. There was a pause, and then, all at once, the questions began, a flood of words bursting suddenly over her head.

"What happened on the ship?" demanded Dustil.

"Where is Bastila?" asked Juhani anxiously.

Mission didn't seem concerned with either question. "Ashi?" she said uncertainly, kneeling beside her friend. "What's wrong, Ash?"

"We ran into Malak," Carth said harshly, and at that Mission's head snapped up. "He would have killed us, but Bastila sacrificed herself so we could get away." The crew exploded into cries of shock, which, again, Ashi seemed untouched by.

The girl's eyes widened, and began to grow watery. "You don't mean… she's not…" She stumbled over her words, seemingly unable to choke out 'dead'.

Jolee snorted, freezing Mission's unfallen tears in place. "Bah, Malak won't kill her. She's too powerful for that. If anything, he'll want to turn her to the dark side, and make himself unstoppable. How long she can hold out against _that_," he added ominously, "I don't know."

Everyone else seemed willing to speculate, but at that moment Carth cleared his throat. "Not so fast. We've got a bigger issue to deal with." He looked over at Ashi, and when he spoke next, it was directly to her. "They deserve to know the truth about you. Do you want to tell them what Malak said, or should I?"

Ashi lifted her head slowly, and for a moment, her eyes sparkled with rage, more like blue flames than anything else. It was more fury that he had ever seen in her face, more than Chuundar and Jorak Uln and Czerka combined could have incited. "I don't fracking _care_ what Malak said," she replied, her words deliberate and dripping acid. "I'm not Revan, I'm Ashi; I thought that you at least _knew that_ after all I've fracking done for you, you—"

"_Revan?_"

* * *

**I can deal with hatred, in review form. Seriously. In fact, anything to let me know you're there is great. It's exam week, so life's a little screwed up, but I promise an update by Sunday...**

**--skrybble o_O  
**


	23. Aftermath

**First off, big thanks to everyone for all the reviews (BlindFury: I'm pretty sure it is the first time she's really cried. Glad to see someone's actually reading... lol) I did say Sunday, and because 'tis the season and all, I'm even keeping the promise. Hopefully it deviates enough for everyone... ;)**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR

* * *

**

**Aftermath: the period of time during which the consequences of an event, esp. a disastrous one, are felt**

"_Revan?"_

Naturally, Mission was the first to speak, her voice was full of disbelief. At the name, Ashi slumped, all the fire leaving her eyes in an instant. "What are you talking about?" the girl demanded, grabbing her arm. "Is this a joke or something, Ash?"

But Ashi didn't smile her usual easygoing grin. When Carth shook his head sharply as well, Mission sucked in a deep breath.

"It's no joke. The Jedi Council captured Revan, and programmed her mind with a new identity. Saul told me on the Leviathan, and Bastila confirmed it."

_Programmed,_ Ashi thought tiredly. _That's all I am now? Programming?_

"Whoa." Momentarily, even Mission was lost for words. "You're_ the_ Revan? The Sith Lord?"

For a split second, Ashi looked like herself. "No, Revan the gizka trainer," she muttered, without glancing up from the floor. "How many Revans do you know?"

But the girl wasn't put off. "This is big," she murmured. "Do… do you remember anything about being the Dark Lord, Ash?"

Ashi looked up at her slowly, her eyes bleak and desolate. "Some," she shrugged. "It's too confusing. I've got two people in my head."

For a moment, all of them held a hesitant silence. "Which one is stronger?" asked Dustil after a pause, the question everyone was wondering but no one wanted to ask.

Ashi gritted her teeth. "Me," she said resolutely. "I'm Ashi."

Now the initial overwhelming shock had worn off—though not entirely—she could look at it slightly more objectively. She didn't feel like a different person, but there was more than one mind in her head. It was like a very strong Force bond, even more so than her one with Bastila. But… that bond hadn't made her into a Jedi brat, had it? This didn't have to affect her either.

Oh, right. This didn't affect her. That was rich.

But this mind—she hesitated to call it _her _mind—was strange, too. It was ripped and stained, patches and frayed edges scattered through the memories. Holes gaped within and between the images, giving her a sense of vertigo if she tried too hard to focus on them. It was obvious, she realized, that even before the Jedi re_programming_, the mind had been far too damaged to hold any consciousness, and leave them sane. So, to some extent, she'd been saved.

_Saved?_ a small part of her mind demanded. _Screw saved! They lied to you—everyone lied to you!_

Ashi ignored that part.

Mission leant back, satisfied. "Then, if you're still you… I don't think there's a problem. You're Ashi. I know who you are now—it doesn't really matter to me."

"Of course it still matters!" Carth exploded. "How do we know that the other mind won't turn out to be stronger? That Revan won't suddenly turn on us?"

He didn't seem to notice Ashi flinching softly at his words, as if they were knives. "Don't call me that," she said, anger quiet but unmistakable in her voice.

Mission nodded. "Yeah!" she chimed in. "I know you, Ash. Whatever you used to be, you're one of us now."

"One of _us_?" Carth echoed, vivid fury splashed like paint across his words. "How can you say that? How can you trust her—how can any of us trust her?"

"I do," interrupted a voice.

Ashi's shoulders tensed ever so slightly; eyes wide and uncertain, she lifted her head to stare at Jolee. "I already knew who you were, lass," he continued, meeting her gaze; she flinched in anticipation of anger, but there was none to be found in his face. "I just didn't mention it because you seemed like an improvement. Anyway, it wasn't my place to tell you; although," he added calmly, "better off that you know, if you ask me. Does it change anything?" He shrugged easily, answering his own question. "I'm not here to judge you. You'll do what you have to, and I'll help if I can."

Carth, reeling from the verbal blow, spun to glare at him. "Don't tell me you don't think this is important!" he exclaimed, desperation beginning to seep into his voice. "Just look, we've been trying to stop Malak, and the whole time we've had his goddamn master listening in on our plans! And, for all we know, she could turn on us any time."

But Jolee's spark had been enough. Loudly and deliberately, Canderous snorted.

It could have been quiet or trivial under other circumstances, but at that moment it was like a gunshot as it cut through the hold, silencing Carth for a moment as effectively as a bullet. Pityingly, the Mandalorian met the soldier's eyes, and shook his head.

"I don't care, Republic," he declared. Carth's mouth opened, another rant preparing to spill from his lips, but the warrior spoke again to cut him off, this time to Ashi. "You're Revan," he said, and yet it wasn't an accusation, "the best fighter my people have ever seen! You were the only one in the galaxy who could best us. In all rights, you're Mandalore." Those words, truths that spoke directly from the past, visibly shocked Ashi, but he continued nonetheless. "Whatever you're fighting, it'll be worthy of my skill. I'm your man until the end, no matter how this plays out."

More than one person latched onto the last few words—and how _did_ he expect this to 'play out'?—but again Canderous was unperturbed. He punctuated his speech with a brief nod at the end, and then glanced around to see if he had anyone else on Ashi's side. Involuntarily, Ashi's eyes moved to his legs: it was almost unnoticeable, but he favored one over the other. He had hurt himself fighting with her, she thought guiltily; he would never be the same warrior again, and yet here he was, regretless and among the first to speak in her defense.

/I agree/ barked Zaalbar, eyes darting towards the warrior but settling quickly back on Ashi. /You have redeemed me in the eyes of my people and brought freedom to my planet. Even if I were not bound by a lifedebt, I would continue to follow you. You are not the person you once were, and you have proven yourself a thousand times over./

Mission grinned, punching the Wookiee in the arm. It had the same effect as a gnat would have had on a bantha, but she didn't seem to care.

T3 beeped something, and HK nodded. "Observation: For once in your pathetic existence, droid, you are being intelligent. Revelation: I knew who my master was from the moment I saw her in the fool mechanic's shop. She matched a genetic pattern I had been programmed to recognize. As she was my master, I simply did not think it mattered what she called herself. Whatever she may be called by you lesser meatbags, my master is my creator, and I will remain loyal to her."

At 'creator', Mission's eyes widened, and Dustil visibly tried, and failed, to force a grin from his face. "You _built_ HK?"

Ashi met his eyes, looking rather unrepentant, and offered, "Oops?"

"Irrevocable damage to the galaxy," interjected Jolee, with a wry glance towards the droid.

Carth scowled, unamused. "Figures," he said viciously. "Only a Sith lord could invent something that bloodthirsty."

HK's eyes sparked crimson. "Statement: although I am aware, meatbag, that it was not a compliment," he said calmly, "I shall take it as one." At that, Mission and Dustil laughed outright, and Ashi almost grinned, but it died stillborn under Carth's icy stare.

Delicately, Juhani cleared her throat, and the eyes turned to her. It was plainly obvious, even from Jolee, that they expected a quiet remark in Ashi's favor, but the words that filled the air next were anything but gentle. "When I was a child," Juhani said flatly, "I was enslaved by the Exchange to pay my family's debt. Had the meeting been completed, I would have been sold into prostitution. I was…" She paused, frowning lightly at the young Twi'lek sitting on the floor. "About Mission's age," she said thoughtfully. "Possibly younger."

Mission flinched, not missing the fiercely protective glances she immediately received from the majority of the crew. However, no one could look away from the Cathar for long, and even Carth was left stunned into silence by her brutal honesty. "I was not, however," Juhani continued, "because I was saved by a group of Jedi. They were led by Revan, at the point when she had just begun her fight against the Mandalorians. It is my belief that you are the person Revan was then," she said, speaking as if no one else stood there but Ashi, "particularly after you have redeemed me and given me another chance."

But now Juhani turned her eyes to Carth, slitted pupils gleaming, and he almost flinched under her steely gaze. "If Ashi were truly evil, she would have struck me down in my grove, after I had fallen," the Cathar said, her tone matter-of-fact. "Would she really have saved me, Carth, if she were so terrible?"

Ashi didn't seem to mind being talked about in the third person. A slow, fragile smile that threatened to crack her masklike face was spreading across her lips, widening fractionally with every word in her defense.

"Yeah," Mission chimed in. "She ain't Revan any more, Carth! She helped me find Griff, and she's saved most of us, like, a million times, and… and she always gets in trouble, 'cause of how hard she tries to help people out!" she exclaimed, her tone daring him to try and correct her. "I'm not turning against her because of who she was. I know who she _is_," she finished firmly, crossing her arms and frowning at Carth. The eloquence with which she spoke was surprising but unmistakable, unaltered by her characteristic backstreet slang.

"Me too," added Dustil, leaping in to back up Mission and ignoring his father's furious look. _The Sith are evil_, had been his first thought, _without them Selene would be alive_, but without _Ashi_, he realized, he would still be on their side to begin with. He was better off that Revan hadn't died that day—had she, he might never had been saved.

"If you're Revan—I mean, you know," he amended quickly, "if you're evil—why would you have helped me? Why would you go out of your way to help out _everyone_ you see? I don't think you're evil. And I don't think I'll give up on you because of what you used to be." He finished with a pointed glare at Carth, obviously not impressed by grudges. For a moment, as their eyes met, he thought he saw a glimmer of hurt in his father's face, but it vanished in moments, washed away by fury.

"You're all crazy," he proclaimed, throwing up his hands in disbelief. "You're going to side with a Sith lord?"

"Contradiction," snapped HK. "No, you foolish meatbag, we are siding with a _former _Sith lord. I believe it is Malak that has dishonorably usurped the title, although," he added hopefully, head swiveling to throw Ashi a meaningful glance, "I would be happy to assist my master in reclaiming it."

"Yeah, I'm sure you would, droid," said Mission, rolling her eyes.

Ashi looked up at Carth, meeting his gaze. "Well?" she asked steadily, refusing to beg for any kind of concurrence. "_They_ all trust me. You going to side with me, or what?"

Carth stared at her. "You're _Revan_," he said. Coming from everyone else's mouths, it had been respectful or accepting. He spat the words like poison, and they lashed her across the face, gouging into the pale, red-streaked skin. "How could I possibly trust you?"

For a long moment, she stared back, half-dried blood painting her cheeks like scarlet tears. She wanted to not care, to brush him away like she could have a stranger, but it was impossible. A painful tightness squeezed inside her chest, and she found her next breath audibly trembling as it passed back across her lips. Slowly, she pulled herself to her feet, allowing herself a final glance around at all of them. "Thanks," she said shakily, swallowing hard. "Thanks, guys. Look, I need to… to think… and I'm just going to…"

Her voice trailed off, but it was far too obvious what she was trying to say. Ashi swallowed hard, and then strode quickly out of the room. A moment later, the door to the cargo hold slammed.

Mission rounded immediately on Carth. "You made her cry!" she accused, face violet with anger.

Despite himself, the soldier looked slightly shamefaced. "She said she wants to think!"

Jolee rolled his eyes. "She's just figured out she's the Sith Lord, and you think we should let her sit and cry because you're feeling resentful?" He shook his head, disapproval clear in his eyes, and the solider found himself shrinking involuntarily under the many critical gazes suddenly fixing on him. "Son, I've met banthas with more compassion than that."

Mission nodded. "_I'm_ going to go see if she's okay," she announced, taking a step towards the cargo hold. Carth held out a hand to stop her, but she glared ferociously, a look that would have sent a Krayt dragon fleeing in moments. "Move, geezer, or I'll sic the crew on you," she threatened, raising her eyebrows to make sure he knew it was only half a joke.

Carth stared around at all the determined faces, and found, to his own surprise as much as theirs, that there was nothing he could say. With a murderous scowl at all of them—lingering longer on Dustil than anyone else—he turned and brushed past, turning down the hallway to the cockpit. Almost everyone ignored him, Mission hurrying straight ahead to the cargo hold without sparing him a glance. Naturally, the door was locked when she got there; the surprise, however, was that she couldn't undo it with her usual ease. "Space, she's done a good job with this," she muttered, wrestling with a security spike.

A voice behind her caught her off guard. "Here, I'll get that," interrupted Dustil, waving a hand. The door clicked softly, lock flashing to green, and Mission grinned.

"Finally, a cool way to use the Force. Thanks, Dustil."

"Don't mention it, kid," he replied with a smirk, ignoring Mission's indignant look. "Go on… you better go see Ash." He stopped, looking at a slight loss, and shoved his hands awkwardly into his pockets. "I'm going to go talk to… uh…"

Breaking off, he indicated the cockpit with a slight jerk of his head. Mission grimaced in sympathy—this was one reason that not having parents didn't bother her. "He's not really mad at you, y'know," she said tentatively, hoping it was the right thing to tell him. "He's just upset, Dustil."

He gave her a fleeting half-smile, worn but grateful. Mission bit her lip, knowing full well the sacrifice he was making: to side against his father was to gouge directly back into barely-healed wounds. "He shouldn't take it out on her, though," Dustil said angrily, with deep resolve. "He's being an asshole."

She grinned. "That what you're going to tell him?"

"I'm serious, though," he insisted, leaning against the wall with a frown tugging at his face. "He needs to know that—he needs me to tell him that. If it's me, he'll listen."

But she heard the uncertainty in his voice, and knew he wasn't as confident as the words implied. She took a couple steps forward, and then wrapped her arms around him, immediately relieved when he hugged her back. "It'll be all right," she murmured, with assurance that somehow didn't need to be rational. Dustil knew she wasn't just talking about Carth—they both know, deep down, that nothing would be quite the same now.

"I hope so," he nodded, and space, he wanted to stand there forever, and hear her say that again and again. When was the last time someone had said that to him: that everything would be okay? It was something that a _father _should be saying, not a friend. Except, oh, right; his father was sulking on his own, busy making things even more damn complicated than they already were. Frustration flooded through him, and he reminded himself he had to talk to Carth. He couldn't stand here using up sympathy when Ashi, on the other side of the door, needed it so much more.

He stepped back reluctantly, and nodded towards the hold. Mission's mouth opened slightly, surprised and then slightly ashamed, and she turned back for the door, hearing Dustil's footsteps dragging away. "Good luck," she called, after his retreating figure, and then turned to the room, letting the door hiss open.

"Ash? You…"

She hesitated as she paced into the hold, hating the thought of finishing '…_okay?_' Obviously not; and to ask would have been the most brainless thing in the world. "Ash?" she repeated instead, abandoning the question.

"Go away, kid."

Mission ignored her, settling down cross-legged on the floor a couple feet away. "Look, Ashi, Carth's being stupid. It's not…"

But at that Ashi raised her head, glaring through red-rimmed eyes. "Yeah, Mission? And what if he's right? How could you guys trust me?"

Mission's eyes filled with disbelief, the kind so pure and naïve that it disappeared without fail by age sixteen. "How could we _not_?" she demanded. "You're not Revan, Ash. You're you."

Ashi shook her head. "But… what if he's right, Mish? What if you shouldn't trust me? Ashi Lucas isn't even _real_—the Jedi made her up." She paused, and then added, "Which is _very_ creepy…" with a small shudder of disgust.

"Ashi the smuggler isn't real," Mission replied with a shrug, "but you're the real Ashi. You made her real… I guess." She made a face. "I'm not too good at all this psychology stuff, you know?"

Ashi grinned dryly. "No, that was… that was deep, Mission."

Mission hesitated uncertainly for a second, and then punched Ashi lightly in the arm. "I'm trying!" she protested.

Ashi nodded, and found her smile slipping away—for it was true, and how hard Mission really _was_ trying was heartrending, but it still wasn't _enough_. "I know you are. But… but I'm not _real_, Mission: who I am now, or any of it. I'm not who I thought I was." Her thoughts were, more specifically, _What if a fake mind isn't strong enough?_ but she hesitated to ask that answer of the girl.

Mission put on a face of mock horror, but her next words proved her wiser than she usually received credit for. "Oh, space, you're going philosophical. I can't help you out with that one—but," she continued, aware that Ashi couldn't, or, at least, wouldn't tell her everything, "I can get someone who can." She hesitated, before scooting closer, wrapping her arms around her friend. After a moment, Ashi returned the hug weakly.

"I _know_ you're not Revan," Mission murmured quietly. "I know it, Ash."

But when she shifted away again, Ashi just pressed her face against her knees: she heard Mission's footsteps padding away, and refused to look up when Jolee entered. He took one look at her and heaved a long, irritable sigh as he walked over.

"You know what the problem with youth is lately?" He plopped himself down on a crate, giving her no time to refuse to answer. "They're too stubborn, damn it."

Ashi smiled a little, despite herself, but then her face creased with anger. "Yeah, well, you know what the problem with the Jedi is lately?"

Jolee grimaced. "Quite a lot, actually, lass. But I assume you're referring to your identity crisis?"

Ashi raised her head to meet the old man's gaze, and he felt a flood of sympathy rush through him at the look in her eyes. _No one that young should suffer that much_. "Who am I, Jolee?" she asked miserably. "Who does that make me, if everything that makes me, me, isn't fracking _real_?"

He harrumphed. "I see what the kid meant by philosophical." Taking a deep breath through his nose, he surveyed Ashi closely. "You aren't _not_ real, lass," he said carefully, making sure he had gotten the double negative right. "You are a person. You most definitely exist." He raised an eyebrow, inviting a contradiction, and she glared.

"But my _identity_," she protested. "Everything I thought was me isn't real. It's just _programming_"—she spat the word with disgust—"from a bunch of preachy old men."

Jolee cracked a smile at the last part. "Yes, and I won't pretend to understand how that must feel. But here's the thing, lass: that didn't make you less of you. The way I see it, you're not perfect like the Council must have wanted. That leaves me to believe that you were too real for them to erase you. Your mine is too strong for that."

Ashi stared, horrified. "You think I'm still Revan?"

"Bah," he snorted, rolling his eyes. "Hopeless. No, lass, no one thinks you're the Sith lord anymore, not even that homicidal droid of yours. But you're a lot like Revan must have been—strong-willed, charismatic, an excellent fighter. You believe in a lot of things; what's more, you'd happily fight to the death to defend those beliefs of yours. You believe in love, and emotion. You're full of righteous anger."

He sighed deeply, the ghost of a smile on his lips. "But you're not evil. You have her beliefs, but you've refused to compromise your humanity in an effort to defend them. You're not Revan," he finished quietly, "you're the person she could have been."

And then he leaned back, the intensity in his face melting into a contented grin. "Ergo," he declared with satisfaction, "you are real."

Ashi smiled weakly, for a split second, but then her face crumpled and she shook her head forcefully. "I'm real," she said, "and so was Revan, Jolee. Everything I did isn't just _gone_ because I'm a different person now."

The old man sighed, forehead furrowing into familiar, worn creases. "Stubborn," he proclaimed, half-irritable. "In fact, far too _damn _stubborn for your own good." Muttering under his breath, he heaved himself to his feet. Ashi's eyes followed his movements, surprise written openly in them.

"You're leaving?" she wondered, clearly taken aback.

"Well," the old man observed, glancing calmly back at her, "it's obvious nothing _I _can say will make a difference. You'll think about this yourself, lass, and you'll find an answer you can live with."

_There isn't_ any_ part of this I can live with, _Ashi wanted to say, but he was gone before she had a chance. Alone, she closed her eyes, wrapping her arms tightly around herself. She hated this—their forgiveness, their _understanding_, which was even worse than if they had been angry. A weed of doubt, growing and winding through her mind with every moment, demanded, even if her new mind was stronger than her old one, whether it could possibly make a difference. She was a monster for what she had been, even if not for what she was, and she knew—try as they might—that no one else would understand that.

* * *

"You bastard."

Carth whirled around, his face twisting in rage. "_What_ did you call me?"

"A bastard," replied Dustil from the doorway, enunciating slowly. "Because you deserved it. Why don't you shoot out her kneecaps next time? That'd be about as painful." Somewhere between Mission's hug and the cockpit, short as the journey was, it had become too much for him that he—he, the _son_—had to be the goddamn voice of reason. Carth shook her head furiously, and opened his mouth to argue, but Dustil cut him off. "You care about her, don't you?" he demanded.

Carth opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again, before spluttering for a few seconds. "That's completely beside—"

Dustil nodded evenly, taking it in stride. "I knew it. But you're not going to forgive her, because of what Revan did. Were you like this with Mom, too? Would you have let her cry, while you ran away and sulked?" he challenged, his voice rising.

"Don't you bring your mother into this!" roared Carth furiously, fists clenching by his sides. "It's not the same!"

"Yeah? How? Ashi needs you, and you're not being there for her! You're making the same stupid mistake all over again!" Dustil was shouting, waving his arms wildly, and he knew it, but it felt _good_ to tell his father this: to taste the cold truth in his mouth and feel it spilling from his lips. "Do you know how much it hurts her, that you're acting like you hate her? I can _feel_ how fracking miserable she is right now, and I'm not even a goddamn Jedi," he snapped, and he was making more than just one point with the words. He wasn't so perfect; neither were any of them. "Believe it or not, Dad, this is a hell of a lot harder for her, so stop acting like you're the goddamn victim!"

Breathing heavily, he stopped—although he wasn't done—his face blazing with anger. "I can't believe you. You care about her, and you're going to what, let her sit and cry?"

"Don't you know what she's done?" Carth growled. "Revan ruined my life! She destroyed Telos; she killed your mother! If it weren't for her, you wouldn't have been on Korriban in the first damn place!"

"And if it weren't for Ashi," countered Dustil, "I'd be a Sith, and you'd still be busy pining for Mom and your stupid fracking revenge." Carth visibly flinched at his words, but Dustil buried his pity to continue. "And Malak gave that order. You can't blame her for that, Dad."

Carth's jaw was gritted, now, his son's words cutting deeper than knives could, and he turned away as Dustil took a deep breath. "Go, and talk to her," said the boy, even as Carth refused to look back at him. "For me. If it weren't for her, Dad, I'd be dead or a Sith by now; you owe her for saving me." He paused, taking a deep breath, and then dared to add, "Please?"

Carth opened his mouth to object, and then, as his son's words sunk in, he closed it. His eyes narrowed as they focused on the stars in front of him. Dustil's gaze rested on his father for a long moment, and for the first time, he fully realized how beaten down the man looked at that moment.

"You don't need to forgive her for being Revan," he said softly, after the silence's call to be broken became too much. "You just need to accept her as being Ashi."

"That, son, was very wise," interjected Jolee with a grin, entering the cockpit. "They may just make a Jedi out of you yet." He smiled, and then his eyes turned to Carth, although he continued to speak to Dustil. "Talked some sense into your bantha-headed father yet?"

Dustil shrugged, unwilling to play along. Carth wasn't looking at them, but Dustil knew that he could see them, from the entire room's reflection in the glassy windows.

The old man sighed irritably. "You and Ashi, stubborn as hell," he remarked to the pilot, but Carth made no reply. "Suit yourself," Jolee said brusquely. "But your son has a lot more sense than you do."

He turned and left, shaking his head reproachfully. Dustil, however, hesitated a moment.

"Please, Dad…?"

The request hung in the air for a moment, hopeful and beseeching as only a child to a parent could be. Carth sighed, eyes dropping so that he didn't have to meet his son's gaze in the glass.

"I'll talk," he said. "That's _all_. Happy?"

"No," Dustil replied honestly. "But it's a start."

He turned and followed after Jolee, leaving Carth with an empty silence, and doubt still buzzing in his ears.

* * *

The ship was dark when its pilot stood stiffly, joints cracking like gunfire, and left the cockpit. He made his way through the silent halls, coming to a wary halt outside the cargo hold. For an instant he hesitated, and then continued onward, spurred by the memory of what Dustil had said. Stepping through the already-open door, he glanced guardedly around, before his eyes fell on Ashi—curled up in the corner, leaning against the wall.

He was surprised, and almost taken aback, by how nonthreatening she looked. Now he knew who she was, he had unconsciously begun to replace his concept of Ashi with a masked Sith Lord, and it was surprising to see her as_ her_ again.

This was also the weakest he had ever seen her look. Her eyes were pressed against her knees, and her fiery hair fell like a curtain, hiding her face from view. It was almost like a crash position. Too bad, he observed, with forced apathy, that it wasn't a physical assault she was trying to deal with.

She spoke suddenly, causing him to jump—he'd thought (and hoped, even) that she was asleep. "Whoever's there," she said sharply, "it's very creepy to stand there and stare at me. Unless, of course, you were figuring out how quickly you could put a bullet in my head before I'd wake up."

The last line made him sure she'd recognized him, but he had to say it all the same. "It's me." Somehow, it felt both tentative and harsh at the same time. "Carth," he added unnecessarily.

"It's me," she replied, her voice unexpectedly wry. "Revan." Sudden, bitter anger at him, at his stupid damn prejudice, was pounding through her, roaring louder in her ears with every passing moment. If she could believe she wasn't Revan—at the least, that she was _more_ that just Revan—why couldn't he?

He was slightly surprised and alarmed by her use of the name, and couldn't reply, but that didn't matter when she continued a second later. "Or isn't that what you think?"

Carth paused, remembering what Dustil and Jolee had told him. _Give her a chance, _he reminded himself. "I… I don't know what to think," he answered, realizing the honesty in his words as he spoke.

Ashi snorted, not impressed by candidness. "Well, I suppose that's a little better than 'I think you're evil, and I'm having a hard time not shooting you'."

His jaw tightened. "I'm not going to shoot you," he said, and it was mostly sincere.

"Really?" she snapped, mock-surprised. He didn't reply. The silence became uncomfortable, and then almost physically painful. Ashi's anger slowly dissipated, turning to regret for starting so badly, and she began again. "Carth…" she murmured quietly, and then stopped, biting back frustration that ached to slip between her teeth and clog the empty air. "Carth, I wish it wasn't true, don't you think I'd fracking prefer that?"

He shook his head, still standing stiffly a couple feet from the doorway. "But it is true. It's horribly true! It was you… you ravaged my world, you killed my wife, you destroyed my life! I've been such a fool," he continued angrily. "All this time… I swore to protect you, and here you were the goddamn enemy!" He knew there was no truth in his words, and he was wrong to be saying this, but it felt perversely good to blame her—to be able to blame someone for this agonizing sense of betrayal.

Ashi bit her lip. "That was Revan," she said. "Not me. And," she added suddenly, "I didn't tell them to bomb your family." He looked down at her, stunned at the words—at the admittance that she _remembered_—but she was meeting his gaze head-on, and the shame in her eyes was well-hidden, masked by anger. "I told them military outposts," she declared, "and I _specified_ no civilian targets. It was Malak, Carth—you can't blame me for that one."

For a moment, Carth wanted to believe her, but then he remembered how good a liar she could be, how many people he'd seen her trick with nothing but words and a smile. "No!" he said sharply. "Don't try to make excuses! You destroyed my life!" He raised a hand to his face, voice anguished. "How could I have been such an idiot? How could I not have known?" He seemed to be talking to himself, but the next second his eyes fixed on her with fury. "How could you have _betrayed_ me like this?" he demanded.

Then, the next moment, there was no doubting she was Ashi. Her eyes lit with fury, and she leapt to her feet, bristling.

"You self-centered _bastard_!" she shouted, her voice magnified by the small room and brimming with rage. "I find out that I'm the fracking Sith Lord, and you think you can just come in here and tell you that _I_ betrayed _you_? How about you betraying me? What about you trusting me, like you would have _yesterday_?"

He scowled back, anger rising like lava within him. "But how much of that trust do you deserve?" he snapped, too caught up to think rationally, to listen to what she was saying and not just her tone. "What about everything we talked about, then? Everything…" He paused, letting his voice trail off. "Was that all a lie, Revan?"

She visibly recoiled at the name; he might as well have hit her. Shadowed pain swept across her face, followed shortly by a tear that skittered down her cheek to her jaw. "I don't know," she answered softly. "Were you lying?"

Carth hadn't expected that reply, and was taken aback for a moment, before glaring angrily. "I can't even tell if you were… or if you are. I'm not even sure what to believe anymore."

Ashi tossed her hair back, crossing her arms. "Yeah? Try having everything you know turn out to be fake. _Your whole goddamned life, Carth_," she snapped. "I'm having trouble even knowing what to fracking _think _right now!"

"Well, if your old life is so fake now… and you remember what you said, what you did!" he added viciously, triumphantly. "Who's to say your old life won't come back, or that it hasn't already?"

He was past the point of thinking, past the point of remembering what Dustil and Jolee had told him: she was Ashi, and that he cared about her whether he liked it or not. "Was the person we knew really Ashi, or just Revan? Who's to say you aren't the Dark Lord now? How can any of us trust you?"

"No, you know what?" Ashi's eyes were blue this time, but they were still blazing with anger, and almost more frightening staying just how they were. "Why the hell should I trust you? You don't trust me enough to believe me when I say I'm me! You don't trust anyone at all, do you, Carth?" she accused, the speculation hitting home—but how could he protest, when he'd been the one to stop pulling punches? "Is it that hard to put faith in someone? To believe in them? Is that so damn impossible?"

Too many questions and all of them true, and he couldn't think past the outrage that she presumed to know him—or, even worse, the fact that maybe she did. "I don't trust Sith Lords," he snarled.

Ashi's mouth opened, and then suddenly fell closed again. All the anger left her face, replaced with shock and hurt. Then, she glared, her eyes narrowing, and straightened. He was half expecting her to slap him. He certainly wasn't expecting what happened next.

"You know, Carth, you're right," she said frigidly. "When it comes down to it, you really can't trust anyone, can you? No one ever means anything they say."

Before he could reply, she lifted a hand, and her fingers twitched sharply. With a jolt, Carth felt his hands move of their own accord, reaching to grab his blaster and then lifting it slowly to aim at Ashi. She didn't flinch as the barrel lifted to fix on her, aimed straight between her eyes. Ironically, however, her actions were as compulsive as his. She had no choice but to do this, from the moment the thought entered her mind. After all, if he decided one way, then she would know she could regain his trust eventually, and if he chose the other… well, she wouldn't have to worry about it any more.

_I'm not the only one_, she realized wryly, as she met his gaze, _who has to figure out what they can live with_.

"You could pull the trigger," she offered, almost casually, as she relinquished control of his hands. She seemed unsurprised that, even though he could have, he didn't lower the blaster. "Get your revenge on Revan. That's what you want, right? Didn't you once say you'd love to put a blaster to her head and pull the trigger?" she quoted, word for word. "Well, here's your big fracking chance." She paused, raising an eyebrow, daring him to do anything at all. "Or didn't you mean that either?"

Carth stared at her, looking her in the eyes, cold brown into challenging blue. His fingers were stuck, locked in place by his own weakness now. _I can't_, he realized with a jolt. He didn't want to shoot her, even if she was Revan. As long as it was an 'if'—as long as there was even a slight piece of Ashi left—he couldn't pull the trigger. Slowly, he lowered the blaster, until it pointed harmlessly at the floor.

Ashi slumped almost imperceptibly, shaking her head. "Not really my day, is it?" she mused aloud, and her unconcerned tone brought the implications of what had just happened crashing down on him.

"You _wanted_ me to shoot you?" he demanded.

She shrugged. "Well, it would make things a lot easier for me."

For some reason, that enraged him even more. That she could want to die—that she could calmly sit there and ask for death—felt unfair of her. It was a brilliant riposte. She was a Sith! She was supposed to be evil, not _depressed_, and she _definitely_ wasn't supposed to be piteous! And that left two options: either she was Ashi; or her manipulation was the best he'd ever seen. Which, of course, if she were Revan, wouldn't be at all surprising.

Carth spluttered for words, before exclaiming, "What the hell are you, now? Suicidal?"

Ashi looked at him, her gaze rueful. "I don't know," she replied quietly. "Isn't suicide supposed to be a cry for help?"

They looked at each other a moment more, and he almost replied several times, but couldn't find a response. That couldn't be Revan talking, he didn't think. The undercurrent of misery in her voice was something that couldn't be faked. And a cry for help… she wanted help? Was she asking for help now, when she never had before?

The silence stretched and elongated, becoming painful as neither of them could figure out what to say. Finally, she spoke again.

"They all trust me," she said. "And I won't really expect you to. But will you at least side with me, if they're all going to? If they can find reason for it?"

There was a note of pleading in her voice, and Ashi knew it, but she couldn't help it. She needed him to at least be loyal. There were lots of thing he could be in addition—try _not a jerk_—but loyal was a start. They needed _somewhere_ to start right now.

He sighed, his face torn. "Well… everyone else trusts you, and we do need you to stop the Sith. I suppose Malak is the real enemy here," he added—the excuse in its purest form, but she made no comment. "So I don't have much choice but to go along with this for now, do I?"

_That's right, play the victim, _thought Ashi, rolling her eyes. "It's the choice to accept me or not, Republic." The name struck a chord the moment it left her lips: it was a title from an eternity ago, back when they were strangers, and the only feeling between them a mutual dislike. "And accepting me means accepting I'm not a goddamned Sith Lord."

Carth shook his head slowly. "I want to believe you. You've… you should have proven yourself by now…"

"Should have? Hell, yeah, I have!" she interrupted furiously.

"But this is a little much for me to wrap my head around," he finished, ignoring her.

Ashi leaned against the wall and slid down tiredly to the floor, hanging her head. "Yeah. Well, try putting yourself in my place for a second, how about," she replied. Her voice was sharp, but the effect was half-lost, as she didn't look quite angry any more.

He looked at her, and with a jolt, felt a sudden stabbing in his chest, even more painful than before. She looked more than upset, sitting on the floor with her head hung miserably. She looked broken, like a puppet with its strings cut, finding itself lost under its own control; and try as he might to salvage his apathy, it was terrible to see her that way. She was usually so strong, and that made it frightening, but more than that, he couldn't stand seeing her in pain. It was like the torture on the Leviathan, only worse—this time he should be doing something, saying something, but Carth didn't know what.

"This must be… so much of a shock to you," he said lamely, and didn't blame her for not replying. "I don't know how you keep going. I guess… we just both have to find a way to push forward."

He paused, and then continued, with what seemed like tremendous effort, "I can put aside my misgivings for now. And we can, uh… we can talk about this later. Just give me time."

She shook her head. "I already gave you time, idiot. I gave you all the time in the galaxy before. You keep asking for too damn much."

But her face had softened, and a little of the hopelessness had faded. He knew what he had said had been enough. "A little more," he said slowly. "That's all."

There was a pause, and then he murmured, "So… I guess that's it, then."

Ashi didn't reply, except to shrug. He nodded uncertainly, and hesitated. It was obvious that he wanted to leave, and had neither the tact nor the courage to do it, and after a moment, she sighed.

"You can go," she muttered. Carth paused, and then—probably deciding he wouldn't get a better break than this—made his way out. Ashi shook her head slowly after he was gone. It hadn't been more than she had expected, but it still hurt to be the target of his hatred, and his blame. Beyond making her simply miserable, it made her angry. Anger was justified enough right now.

_You'll find a part of this you can live with_, Jolee had said.

But he was wrong. There wasn't any part of this she could live with. Carth might as well have pulled the trigger when he had the chance.

_No._ The thought came instantly, fiercely, knocking all its predecessors aside with a single word. She didn't want to die from the hands of a friend, or at _all_, not even now. She just didn't want to live with herself either.

But she didn't have any other options. There wasn't a gray area left to find when it came to this. She didn't need a midway line to walk; she needed something, anything, to give her a way to get through this.

Then her only choice was to keep looking. It was like Carth had told her, she supposed—she just had to push forward. Process of elimination, and all: as far as she could see, it was the only choice left.

She pulled herself to her feet, weary footsteps dragging her through silent halls to the sleeping quarters. Once there, she collapsed face down onto her bed, cold and exhausted. The dark seemed to press down on her, and her blood had turned to liquid lead; suddenly, she simply couldn't find the energy to move. Somewhere in the middle of all the shock and horror, she had forgotten how tired she really was. Refusing to think, to let her mind work its way back into another vicious circle, she concentrated instead on Mission and Juhani's deep, even breathing, calm despite everything... nice that _some_ people could still be calm...

And somehow, finally, Ashi managed to drift off into a merciful sleep.

* * *

**No, I don't do 'accepting Carth' (or, at least, not _now_. Seriously.) Happy holidays, everyone!**


	24. History

**Happy new year (belated new year. whatever), and as always, huge thanks to everyone who reviewed! Looong chapter to start 2010 on a good foot and all that--enjoy :)**

**(And yes, we do learn how Malak lost his jaw. I'm pretty sure that's a requirement...)  
**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR...

* * *

**

**History: an interesting or colorful past**

There had never been a longer trip for the crew of the Ebon Hawk than the one to Manaan. The entire atmosphere was frigid and on edge, as if a single wrong word might send everything shattering like glass. Maybe it was Carth's harsh silence that kept it so, and maybe it was the rest of the crews' obvious unease, the way they walked as if on eggshells, but most likely it was Ashi. They had never noticed what a difference her bright, vivid character made until it was gone, and they were left with a quiet, desolate person, like a bright, sunny plant that had suddenly wilted—or, more accurately, suddenly been trampled.

It wasn't that she was completely _gone_. She had neither locked herself away or acted like someone else entirely, but it was still different. Half the time she would simply sit quietly in her room, gaze pained and unfocused. They had learned quickly to leave her be—this was something she had to come to terms with on her own.

That said, none of them could fathom what she was thinking in those moments. The memories were Ashi's, and hers alone. No longer was Revan an unknown, irrelevant figure: suddenly and very literally, she was Ashi's life. More so, in a way that should have felt justified and _wasn't_, she couldn't help but to understand her past self completely. That was the worst part—she remembered the corruption that had driven to corrupt her, and it still gave her an echo of injustice.

But she was Revan. Wasn't it supposed to be that she was her only equal? She was, she _must_ be as strong as she had always been; all she needed to do was redirect the strength. If Ashi could see how she had fallen, and understand the path to the dark side, she could keep from walking it again. That was her only comfort. Surely, in falling, she had learned how _not_ to fall. It was a small hope, but the best she had.

What were almost as complicated as the light side, dark side confusion were the memories of Malak… or rather, of Alek. Though her friends worried that she was upset about Carth, Ashi wasn't even thinking about him. This wasn't because she was avoiding the complicated like before, but quite the opposite—she had much more important things to consider. At the top of this list was the Sith Lord's hesitation, and her own.

Ashi knew why she has stopped, with her lightsaber poised. What she didn't know was whether she would have continued or not. It had been only a second that she had paused—a sudden moment when all the memories seized hold of her muscles, freezing her in place—but it had been enough to give him an advantage. She couldn't afford that again.

Except… except he had stopped too, hadn't he? He'd _tried_ to kill her, and she had no doubt that on some level he wanted to, but he hadn't really _done_ anything. Maybe he couldn't. After all, he remembered everything she did—probably more.

He'd called her _love_, and Red, but was that simply to throw her off? An offhand word, aimed carefully to hurt her more? Or did it actually mean something? Even worse, however, she couldn't pinpoint how she felt about him. What did it feel like to be in love? Obviously she couldn't love Carth—it all fell apart far too easily for that—but certainly Revan and Alek had loved each other. So what about Ashi and Malak, now?

Damn, this was confusing.

With these contemplations of love came a more trivial thought. The only person she'd ever really cared about before was Malak. She'd had friends, certainly, but he was the one she trusted, and, hence, the only one she'd ever wanted a relationship with. So, were the only people she'd ever kissed a Republic soldier and a usurping Dark Lord, both of who had tried to kill her at one point or another?

Actually, no. This memory came with a jolt of guilt, something that stabbed right below her ribs and twisted painfully. There had been three people. She and Malak had begun to drift after the Star Maps and their quest, but it wasn't until she caught him with that filthy little Twi'lek that she had…

_Oh_, thought Ashi weakly. _So that's how Malak lost his jaw._

She remembered vividly heading to his room to try to talk to him, and walking in to find the two of them all over each other. The next few minutes were a blur of outraged betrayal, but some parts stuck out…

…_The Twi'leki girl ran. Revan didn't blame her. She had swapped her battle robes for a simpler black cloak, and went, quite literally, bare-faced. She'd needed a real talk with Malak. They'd been distant lately, and regardless of whether he was exactly an ally or an enemy, she had to keep him close—even more so if the latter. However, her face was almost more frightening without the mask at that moment: white with fury; eyes flashing bright gold like lamps. Apparently that Twi'leki whore wasn't willing to brave the Dark Lord's rage for Malak. Revan didn't blame her. She didn't think her lover was worth very much either right now._

_He had been against the wall, only one left right where two of them had been a moment ago. He was pale too, but he tried an apologetic grin as he straightened his hair that _her_ hands had been in and brushed off his robes. It hadn't helped. She had advanced on him, drawing her lightsaber. The specific words she had used weren't coming back to her, but it was something about him not deserving a mouth if he was going to use it with a _filthy Twi'leki schutta_…_

_She had immediately left Malak for one of her generals after that, just to spite him back. That had been cruel of her, unnecessarily so—she didn't even remember the other man's name. Obviously, because Malak still knew her best, he knew it was all a ploy to hurt him, but it still worked. There was also the fact that he wasn't getting _any_ with that synthetic jaw of his…_

Ashi shuddered. The betrayal had felt very real, but so did this smugness. She shouldn't be _smug!_ She'd cut off his jaw!

_Even if he deserved it…_

_No_, Ashi thought firmly. _It's not something to be proud of. Mostly._ After a pause, however, she began to skim the memories again. What happened next?

_It was about a month later when they had both stopped managing it. She could get anything she wanted from the Jedi, but it didn't mean anything, and with Malak, it had used to mean so much. He was angry about his jaw, but he knew he had been wrong first, and it only made him feel worse that she had been on her way to try and reconcile with him. They _had_ made up again, in a rare moment of forgiveness…_

_But it was never the same. She had crippled him. They acted like it was fine, but they never got back to where they had been. That was probably what had made it so easy for him to fire on her, too…_

Every day was like this. Every day snips of memories would suddenly crush her like a tidal wave, and it would take all her focus just to sift through them without her mind collapsing in on itself. Her sleep was broken and restless—she was only aware of waking, cold and sweating, in the middle of the night, but Mission informed her that she screamed or cried sometimes—and she began to gain a perpetual haunted look, dark circles that matched her lightsaber carved out under her eyes. No one could help a rush of sympathy from looking at her, not even Carth. He knew that screaming in her sleep couldn't be faked.

They were all eager to arrive. Despite the majority of her memories being horrible, Ashi was at least grateful for having solved the mystery of her déjà vu. Now she could remember perfectly the last time she had come to Manaan. By then Red and Alek were gone, and Revan and Malak had taken their places. And the Star Map was… _hmm_. Ashi scanned the memories—it still wasn't like remembering of her own accord; more like skimming a well-known book—and then flinched.

The ocean floor.

Really, she should have seen that coming. Most of Manaan was water. But still, Ashi didn't like the memories of descending to the bottom of the ocean, as light vanished around her and gave way to cold, murderous depths…

She remembered being scared before, too. That wasn't reassuring. But, try as she might, the Star Forge coordinates had slipped through a hole in her mind, lost to her, and no amount of desperation would call them back. She had to find the Map.

But when some would have stayed on the ship, curling in a ball and hiding from the world, Ashi flat-out refused to be confined. The only thing that lurked on the ship was doubt, waiting to swallow her alive, and she'd be damned if that happened. She had to be out doing something; at least then she wouldn't have to think too hard about anything.

She took Mission and Jolee off the Ebon Hawk—they were the two who seemed to be the most at ease with her—where they managed to walk right into a Republic soldier and Sith arguing. Ashi wondered what would happen; she knew from Revan that neutral Manaan had a strict policy against fighting. In fact, one small camera was flittering hysterically around the pair, waiting to capture and incriminate at the first hint of violence.

"Go on," goaded the Sith. "Make the first move. I'd love to see what the Selkath would do to you." The Republic soldier growled under his breath, but made no move, and the other man shook his head. "I knew it. You Republic are all the same—all talk and no action."

Carth leapt to mind. _Too true_, thought Ashi resentfully.

A sneer curling across his lip like he'd tasted something bitter, the Sith turned away. Though the Republic soldier's hand flew to his blaster, he did nothing but clench his fist. "Damn Sith," he growled. "Don't know what those fish are thinking, letting them on the world. If it was me, I'd take every single one of those bastards and…" He didn't finish the thought, but pounded his fist against his hand, enough of an explanation. Then he noticed who he was talking to.

"Oh, damn… I apologize, master Jedi."

"I'm not a Jedi," Ashi sighed automatically. "And not Sith," she added, seeing the man's expression. "I'm sort of freelance."

But that was wrong. For the first time, she realized, 'sort of' didn't work. With Revan, it was a choice between Jedi and Sith. She couldn't just walk in between any more, not when that would be close enough to the dark side for most people. Did she have to start being a real Jedi? But that sounded stupid: to change just so people would think she hadn't.

"Oh." He nodded. "A merc. You should talk to Wann. We could use your help."

"With what?" _It's Manaan, genius—peace sort of implies no hired mercenaries._

He shrugged. "Damned if I know, but he's paying. You can probably find him in the base. You know where that is?"

Ashi snorted. "Course I do."

"All right," he said doubtfully. "If you're sure." Giving her an uncertain look over his shoulder, he walked off.

"You don't know, do you?" chirped Mission.

Ashi grinned, shrugging. "I'll find it—I don't need help." Smiling brightly, a grin that was very slightly forced, she began to head toward Ahto City.

Mission trailed behind, eyes wide. This was the first planet they had been to that was, for lack of a better word, peaceful. Korriban couldn't possibly be calm with all the Sith, and with Anchorhead, boring wasn't the same as serene. Manaan was different. All around them was gleaming white: beams that rose to support arching ceilings; floors that sparkled with cleanliness; bubbling fountains that glittered cheerfully. Mission had never been somewhere so clean, not even Dantooine. It was beautiful in a very grand and pristine way—she was over-aware of her every echoing footstep in the quiet halls of the docking bay.

It stayed quiet all the way to the entrance office, where Ashi paid the docking fee—for the first time—and they made their way into the real part of Ahto City. Mission expected the general hum of noise that arose from thousands of people living together.

There was nothing.

She was disconcerted as they walked along the side of a large central fountain. Sith and Republic soldiers walked in little groups, obviously watching their step under the omniscient gaze of the Selkath, but they spoke in low murmurs, and the giant frog-like beings didn't speak at all, except the occasional gurgle. Ashi and Jolee were unperturbed, but Mission felt unsettled.

They had only gone a short distance, however, when a Selkath called out to Ashi. /Excuse me, human?/

Ashi was surprised—usually Selkath were reasonable but aloof to non-Selkath, and she suspected they disliked other species on Manaan altogether. "Yes?"

/Perhaps I may have a moment of your time?/ When she nodded, he continued, /I was wondering if you might have any exotic species on your ship./

Ashi's eyes widened, but otherwise she gave nothing away. "Why?"

/We are trying to set up a zoological institution on Manaan/ he explained. /We have little exposure to species of different planets, but we have been hoping to change that. The only problem is that…/ He paused. /Some animals are not technically supposed to be transported. It has been difficult to find species that can be legally shipped to us. But we are willing to pay for any species you may have./

Ashi was grinning. Widely. "You wouldn't happen to have gizka already?"

He gasped, visibly backtracking. /Gizka? I am terribly sorry, but we could not possibly take any of those. We had two before, and before long we had too many to count./

In the blink of an eye, something changed in Ashi's face. Her eyes became suddenly magnetic, almost hypnotic, and a small smile creased her lips. It was almost enough to distract from the dark half-circles framing her lower eyes. "But these are special gizka," she said innocently, her voice layered with the Force. "They don't breed like that."

Mission blinked hard, and then almost laughed. The Selkath had never stood a chance. Mouth half open, he gave a dazed nod. /That is… that is fantastic. Thank you./

"No problem," Ashi smiled. "Docking bay 14." He nodded and hurried off, and she called after him, "You might have to catch some of them, though…"

He started to turn, lips parting for the inevitable question, but Ashi and her friends were already gone. As soon as they were a few steps away, Ashi punched the air, mouthing, "_Yes!_"

Mission giggled, and even Jolee looked relieved, but it was short-lived. Without any kind of warning, a tear-stained woman suddenly came racing towards them and threw herself at him with a shriek.

"Jolee!" she cried, clinging to him desperately. "Oh, Jolee, it's you! Thank space you're here!"

"Elora?" Jolee asked, as Ashi shot him a questioning look. Uncertainly, he returned the hug. "Of all the people… what are you doing here? And what's wrong?"

"I live here…" she mumbled, pulling away. "With… with Sunry…" Somehow, the name brought on a whole new round of sobs.

"Sunry?" Jolee looked surprised. "Has something happened to him?"

"Yes!" she wept, voice trembling with the words. "Oh, Jolee, it's horrible! The…" She paused to take a shaky breath, and then exploded, "The Sith have accused him of murder!"

Jolee's eyes widened in shock. "Murder? But how?"

At that, Elora's face darkened. "It's all a mistake," she proclaimed, with utter assurance. "Sunry isn't a murderer. Someone is trying to frame him!" she accused, her finger stabbing at the air inches from Jolee's face.

He grabbed her wrist suddenly, snatching it from midair and lowering it forcefully. Elora gave him a questioning look, and he shook his head. "Calm down, Elora," he said firmly. "Where is Sunry now?"

She took a couple deep breaths, and wiped her face. "Yes… yes, I'm sorry. He is being held in the Selkath courts, but they won't let anyone in to see him!" Her voice was rising, but Jolee raised his eyebrows, and she took another gulp of air. "Please, go talk to the Selkath. Perhaps they will listen to you."

Ashi looked skeptical, and didn't bother to hide it, but Jolee nodded. "Of course, Elora. I'll go talk to them and see what I can do. We'll get Sunry out of this mess."

Elora sighed deeply, her shoulders relaxing as if a great weight had suddenly lifted from them. "Thank you, Jolee," she mumbled. "I knew I could count on you." Giving him a smile as watery as the ocean a few yards away, she turned and walked away.

"And what in space was that all about?"

Jolee frowned as he looked over at Ashi. "My friend Sunry's been arrested."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I got that, funnily enough. Who's he, though?"

The old man snorted. "What, you think because I was a hermit, I've always been a hermit? Just because I haven't seen Sunry for twenty years doesn't mean he isn't a friend. A man can change a lot in that time, but to become a murderer?" He shook his head. "I can't see it. That's not the Sunry I know."

But despite his words, they both knew she knew plenty about his past. During the various journeys from place to place, Ashi had wrangled a fair amount of stories out of Jolee, about when he was _young_—she had been suitably skeptical about that—and of his Jedi training and smuggling. For all his rants, he had led an interesting life… but never had she heard of Sunry.

"Good man," Jolee continued. "Housed me for a year after I left the Order. War hero too, or, so I've heard. I'd like to help him out, if we can. I owe it to him. Or, you can be a young monkey-lizard and ignore me, I guess. I don't expect much these days."

Just for that, Ashi resolved to help him; and Jolee had known she would. He was perhaps the only one who could, if not manipulate her, then persuade her to change her mind. As it was, though, she had planned to help anyway. It was Jolee, and, while she certainly owed him, she also _liked_ him, which counted for far more.

After some time wandering through the city—to all of their amazement, it seemed to actually be spotless all the way through—Ashi found the High Court, and managed to become Arbitrator for the case. She was a neutral party, supposedly, although in fact she leaned towards wanting to help Jolee's friend. Unfortunately, the official paperwork and briefing took longer than she expected, for Selkath were nothing if not thorough, and by the time they'd finished, night was falling. Ashi and Jolee returned to the ship—Mission, with the parting comment that she never wanted anything to do with law, had left long ago—planning to start on the case the next day.

* * *

It was Ashi, Dustil, and—naturally—Jolee who arrived at the hotel where the murder had happened the next morning. Jolee was a given, but Ashi had handpicked Dustil. Being with the Sith, the boy had developed an uncanny recognition for details and lies, and while Ashi wouldn't condone the academy, she wasn't going to ignore a useful skill like that.

A police line blocked the entrance to the hotel. To anyone determined, that would make no difference, but few were stupid enough to break Selkath laws. Luckily, Ashi didn't need to. As she walked up to the entrance, a man stepped forward.

"Angus Grange. You're the arbitrator, aren't you?" He didn't wait for her to reply. "Well, guess this means you got entrance into the hotel. You'll want the first room on the left."

"Thanks," Ashi smiled, with a generous nod, "but what I _really_ want is information. Maybe you've got some?"

Angus rolled his eyes. "Told the fracking fish already," he muttered, his irritation with the Selkath badly concealed. "Sith woman comes in, rents a room. Little while later, Sunry goes in to meet her. Then, couple hours later, I hear a blaster shot and see Sunry come running. He can't run too good 'cause he's crippled, but he was out of here like a flash. Except"—for the first time, Ashi noticed, he looked suddenly like he was interested—"I'd swear he started after the shot."

She nodded. "Renting rooms? They do that a lot?"

Angus snorted. "Every week or so. Always the same—she rents it, he meets her here. Doesn't take a genius to figure out what he was doing… heh, or who he was doing."

It didn't escape Ashi's notice that Jolee, for the first time, had lost his unflappable expression. He was frowning, almost as if what Angus said didn't make sense to him, and as Ashi glanced back at him, she wondered if this Sunry was the same man Jolee had been friends with. Quickly she changed the subject, inquiring something about witnesses. There were only two, and he agreed to call them in. That done, Ashi and her friends headed to the crime scene itself before the man could make any more innuendos.

The room was surprisingly devoid of corpses. The only thing at all out of place was that the sheets of the bed were covered in dried blood. There was seemingly nothing else in the room, except…

Ashi bent to the floor and picked up a glimmering piece of metal. It was a Republic badge, like Carth wore.

"A medal of honor," Jolee observed. "I wonder…"

"He's been framed."

They both glanced up at Dustil, who continued calmly. "That must have been planted here. Why would he leave his medal unless he had a death wish? That," he declared, "would just be stupid."

_Yes, and we've never dealt with stupid people_, thought Ashi, but still nodded. "You're right." She stood back up, one hand resting lightly against her chin and the other delicately holding the badge. "It could be the Sith. They'd want Sunry framed, wouldn't they?"

"Maybe," Jolee muttered slowly, "and maybe not. We should talk to the witnesses first."

Ashi was surprised at the gruffness in his tone; after all, she'd only been trying to help. Still, his timing was perfect: the two eyewitnesses were waiting when they returned to the ground floor. One was a Rodian who kept twitching nervously, and the other was a human who lived in the hotel. Neither looked happy to see her.

She decided to question the Rodian first—his twitching seemed suspicious, even if it was natural behavior for the species—and they borrowed one of the empty hotel rooms. The Rodian, Gluupor, sat on the bed and stared at her with huge, fearful eyes. He paid little mind to the others, though he should have worried about them a little more: Dustil was carefully monitoring his emotions, and Jolee was reading his thoughts.

There was no need for Basic, as they all spoke Rodian. /Gluupor/ said Ashi calmly, /do you know anything about the crime?/

He shook his head frantically. /Gluupor knows nothing/ he declared fervently. /Gluupor tells Selkath everything he knows. You not know? Gluupor have no reason not to say. Gluupor tells everything. Everything!/

/Gluupor, if you know anything, then you need to tell me/ Ashi said slowly, feeling the irrational need to counterbalance his rapid speech.

/Gluupor knows nothing! Gluupor not do it!/

She frowned. /Do what?/

/What?/

/What did you _do_, Gluupor?/

/Gluupor do nothing! No one tell Gluupor to do anything!/

Ashi raised her eyebrows. /Someone told you to do something, then?/

/No, no! Gluupor do nothing! Gluupor not go in room, Gluupor not go near room! Gluupor not know what you mean!/

/Did you do something to the room, Gluupor?/

/I… no, I… no/ he said, his twitching speeding as he spoke. His eyes, dark and gleaming with worry, darted back and forth. /Gluupor did nothing./

Ashi raised her eyebrows, grinning. /I hate to break it to you, Gluupor, but that's incredibly unconvincing./

The Rodian paused. /Gluupor wants a lawyer./

She smiled. /It's all right, Gluupor. You can trust me. I only want the truth./ Her eyes were glittering with charm, but to Jolee and Dustil's surprise, there was no Force in her voice. It was pure, natural charisma, and Gluupor never stood a chance.

/Why did you go in Elassa's room?/

/After… after crime/ he mumbled, /Sith man come up to Gluupor. Say Gluupor can have much money if he do one little thing. Gluupor has to put medal in Sith lady's hand—that all. So Gluupor does that. Easy. Only not important to Selkath, Sith man say, so Gluupor doesn't tell them. And also Sith man say he kill Gluupor if Gluupor talks… oh./ His voice trailed off.

/Gluupor/ said Ashi, /could you say that in court? Could you tell the Selkath what you did?/

Gluupor's eyes widened in horror. /But… but Sith will kill Gluupor!/

She shook her head. /Gluupor, it's Manaan. When it comes to protection from Sith, you're in one of the safest places in the galaxy. If Sunry's innocent, Gluupor, then you can help us prove it./

He paused for a long moment, and then nodded jerkily. /Yes… Gluupor will tell Selkath. If Gluupor can help./

Ashi grinned. /Thank you, Gluupor. You've been very helpful./ He nodded, and then left the room. Ashi smiled widely as she watched him go. "You know, I should be a detective, when I'm done saving the galaxy."

Jolee shook his head. "One thing at a time," he muttered, but he still looked pleased. If coaxing people to talk was necessary, there was no one better to have around than Ashi.

The other witness was a man named Firith. He ended up being even easier to interrogate than Gluupor, despite the fact that he wasn't necessarily talking to Ashi's face. However, they quickly learned that not only were Sunry and Elassa very definitely in a physical relationship—_kept the whole damn hotel up with their antics_, said Firith, tone implying he hadn't really minded and probably envied Sunry just a little bit_—_but that Elassa wasn't only a Sith. Firith eagerly described "accidentally" colliding with her and seeing her lightsaber under her robes. She had been a dark Jedi.

Ashi was still pondering that as they left the hotel. If Elassa was a dark Jedi, she could have easily manipulated Sunry, and if the Sith had the medal planted, they were definitely trying to frame him. Well, they hadn't done badly at all.

Dustil left quickly—he and Mission had plans, probably to cause trouble—and Jolee wanted to talk to Elora again. That left Ashi at a loose end, and she compensated by going to the cantina. The smuggler part of her was still comforted by it—she tried not to remember that the Council had invented that quirk—and as long as you looked like you weren't someone to mess with, people didn't bother you.

She argued with a couple mercenaries, dodged a couple over-friendly Sith, and managed to promise a frantic Selkath she would find his missing daughter. After all that, she ordered a drink and sat down to think. It was nice, in a way, and startlingly ordinary. This day would have gone exactly the same pre-Leviathan… well, except for one thing.

Carth was still treating her like she was a plague carrier. He was frosty at best, and most of the time he was downright hostile. It didn't really matter if she was cynical or pleasant to him—Ashi knew he would find a way to hate her anyway.

But surely she didn't really need him. She had all her other friends, and anyway, she could have found someone else if she felt like it. She just… well, honestly, she didn't want to.

Finding out she was Revan hadn't made her much smarter.

Damn; she was just thinking in circles. This was hopeless. Angrily she stood, shoving her chair in behind her, and brushed out of the cantina. It was getting late, and sleeping was much easier than thinking. This could wait until tomorrow.

She was fairly sure—_fine_, so navigation might not be one of her talents. It was overrated anyway—she was most of the way back, turning the corner of a main street, when she began to feel strange. Suddenly, she was having trouble concentrating on the city around her. Her mind felt… fuzzy? No—unbalanced. Sharp jabs of pain were beginning to dig against her skull, increasingly worse; it was like hearing explosions from within a building. Unexpectedly, she stumbled sideways as she walked, her vision starting to blur at the edges. She hadn't gotten a drink at the cantina—this was something else.

She needed to get to the ship. Something was wrong—was her heartbeat always so loud in her ears? Again she stumbled, this time falling to the ground. She landed hard on her hands and knees, staring blankly at the white tile before her. Her vision was beginning to flicker: one moment she saw the spotless city, and the next it was dark and cold, and she was tied down, cold metal tearing at her wrists...

She grabbed the side of a fountain to pull herself to her feet, and glanced around. There! She could see the docking bay, and jogged towards it, but when she staggered, lurching to the side and only just catching herself on a doorframe, she reverted to a walk. Her head was hurting more and more, fire flashing along her skull. The Ebon Hawk loomed in front of her, wavering slightly, and she hurried up to it, pressing a hand against her head at a fresh rush of pain.

She was on the ship, turning toward the main room, when she slipped. The fire in her head was sharper, more defined—lightning. She tried to catch herself on the wall, but even that was blurring now, tilting away from her hands.

"_Ashi!_"

Someone ahead of her, grabbing her arm, pulling her upright. Someone in neon orange…

"Are you drunk?" Carth demanded.

"What? No!" she snapped fiercely. Figures were crowding behind Carth, trying to reach her, and there was a buzzing in her ears. "Frack, Carth, my head… help me…"

It happened so suddenly he never saw it coming. She had only just choked out the words when her eyes glazed over. Her hand tightened on his arm, gripping it painfully, and she paled to the color of a ghost. A moment later, she went completely limp.

He stumbled at her sudden weight, and a moment later, Jolee and Canderous both shoved past, the old man a couple steps ahead. Jolee was talking rapidly, words like gunfire, and Canderous nodded. Briskly and easily, he lifted Ashi into his arms, far more careful with her than he would admit. They brushed past Carth, and he stared blankly after them. A thousand thoughts were rushing through his mind, none of them coherent. It didn't matter if he cared or not: it would still frighten him when she did things like that, every single time.

* * *

_It was so dark… Force, it was _so_ dark…_

_Only flashes of light, flashes of agony, lit the inside of the temple. She was bolted to the rock, the cold metal biting her wrists and ankles: ice, to go with the fire. She screamed—lightning stabbed like knives of fire, the pain familiar by now but no more bearable—and Malak laughed._

"_You are strong, little Jedi," he observed, a smirk in his voice. "But I will break you."_

_She turned her head away. "No… I'll never fall… you can't turn me…" she whispered, shoving the empty phrases through bleeding, trembling lips. They emerged with no conviction. She had felt the bond, which she had tried so hard to block, slip open. Her strength was fading—and if she couldn't even protect Ashi, how would she protect herself?_

_Malak took a few steps away, and then turned to face her with an evil smile. Bastila closed her eyes in anticipation of the torture, but it never came. What she felt was maybe worse: a cold hand reaching into her head, groping around, squeezing her heart as it raced in her chest._

"_Ah," Malak said slowly, relishing the taste of her mind as it flowed into his. "You have a bond?"_

_She didn't answer._

"_So Revan feels this, does she?"_

_Light. Pain. Screaming._

"_Does Revan hear me, too?" He was toying with her, enjoying himself._

"_I don't know…" she murmured. "Maybe…"_

_Ashi sighed. _Revan wishes she didn't…

_Malak paused, and bent closer. "Then tell Revan that she had better be ready. Last time, I gave her mercy. This time, she will not be so lucky." He lifted a hand, very deliberately, and sent a bolt of lightning searing through Bastila, ignoring her spasm of pain and small, helpless cry. "Tell Revan that if she thinks this is bad, then she has seen nothing yet."_

Uh-oh_, thought Ashi._

"_Revan will come," Bastila said shakily. "Revan will fight you."_

_For the first time, Malak's face grew bitter. "Of course," he snarled. "Hero that she is. We would all like to believe that Revan will stand by us, but the truth, Bastila, is that she will not. Revan has no loyalty—did she to your Order, either time you tried to confine her? No, and she has no more devotion to her companions now than two years ago. Your faith in her is admirable, but wasted."_

No,_ thought Ashi fiercely. _Bastila, don't listen, I'm coming. We're going to save you!

"_She will…" Bastila whispered brokenly. "She will come…"_

"_No," Malak hissed sharply, his words grating together like edges of broken glass. "Don't fool yourself. You are alone, Bastila. You have nothing but your empty Code. Will your Jedi save you now?"_

The Code_, Ashi heard Bastila think. _The Code… the Code can't help me, the Jedi can't save me…

_But her words were braver than her thoughts, and for the first time, Ashi found herself impressed by Bastila's lying. "Torture will not turn me," whispered the girl fiercely. "You speak of things you do not know. You left the Jedi long ago, Malak, and you do not understand. Sith will never find peace."_

_He laughed. "But is peace not a lie?"_

_**There is only passion…**_

"_You are the one lying!" she accused, her voice rising. So much for keeping her calm. All three of them heard it climb in volume, and Malak smirked._

"_No, you are. I saw you, Bastila. You tasted the darkness in Revan, so long ago, and you _hunger_ for it. You wish to shed your foolish Jedi restraints and start anew." He smiled. "You cannot know the freedom in the dark side until you feel it for yourself. This is but a taste to whet your appetite. The Jedi hold you back, Bastila, like they held me and Revan back before. They _envy_ you," he said softly, bending down to murmur in her ear._

_Bastila paused, uncertain. _Don't,_ Ashi cried, _he's lying, don't listen;_ but the Jedi could not hear her. _

"_They are weak and old, and you have so much power. They train you to hold yourself back. They try to turn you against yourself, to teach you to wield the Force _wisely_"—the word, a direct quote, dripped contempt, and Bastila flinched—"and for what reason? They resent you, Bastila, you and your power. They wish to keep you from your full strength."_

_**Through passion I gain strength…**_

"_You can be so strong, so powerful. Power like this…" He raised a hand, fingers twitching ever so slightly, and she screamed in agony, jerking against the stone. "Do you feel it?" he crowed, the lightning reflected, golden, in his eyes. "This freedom? What could be yours?"_

_**Through strength I gain power…**_

No, Bastila, don't listen! Think about… about us, and the Jedi, and your mom! You can't turn Sith, Bastila—what about your mom?

"_So easy, Bastila, to defeat Revan—to rule the galaxy! You will be my apprentice, and the Force will serve us; nothing will stand in our way!"_

_**Through power I gain victory…**_

_Bastila threw back her head, and screamed. Malak staggered back, a ripple of energy cleaving the Force around him, and Bastila wrenched her hands up. The metal snapped under her strength as if it were nothing but paper. She sat up, free, and looked at Malak, and yet this time she saw him with more than her eyes. Darkness swirled around him, drawn by a self-gravity he'd acquired two years ago, and she hesitated, but it was there, so _close_… and he was right, she did want it, she wanted it so much...  
_

_She reached out a pale but certain hand. Malak smiled in anticipation._

There is no emotion,_ Ashi blurted, willing her voice to be heard against all odds,_ Bastila, there's peace, there's serenity, don't do it, _please_…

_**Through victory, my chains are broken…**_

_Bastila Shan reached out, and the darkness came to her. Like a serpent, it twined itself through her slender fingertips and coiled up her arm, almost seductively slow from the certainty that she would not change her mind. She closed her eyes in ecstasy and opened her mouth, and the blood-red mist of evil rushed into her, filling her lungs, her heart, her mind. Somewhere near her, Malak laughed in triumph. Bastila smiled as she murmured the final line aloud._

"_The Force shall free me…"

* * *

_

"He's lying… no, no, no emotion… peace… don't, please… _no_!"

The last word was screamed, and then Ashi jerked upright with a cry. Her mind was racing, thoughts were scattered and confused. Had she... been dreaming? All she could remember was her head hurting, and being dizzy, and blurriness… and then the vision…

Oh, space. The _vision._

She decided she wouldn't mind passing out again.

With all her heart, she wanted to refuse it. She wanted to pretend that it wasn't real, more than she wished she could take back the Leviathan—at least it half made sense for _her_ to be evil, but Bastila? _Bastila?_—but she couldn't, because it _was_. The Jedi's poster child had fallen.

Malak's words came back to her. _You tasted the darkness in Revan_… he'd said. It had been her who instilled the desire in Bastila in the first place, hadn't it? Ashi had been the one to tempt her, and on the Leviathan, Ashi hadn't saved her. Bastila had fallen—Bastila was tortured and twisted until she shattered, and she had fallen—and it was Ashi's fault.

It took a long moment for her to realize that tears streaked her face. She was crying, and she seemed to have been at it for a while, judging from the dry saltiness stiff on her cheeks.

"Ashi?"

She jumped, and glanced over. Jolee had entered the medbay, his face unreadable.

"Bastila?" he asked, and Ashi knew he could tell. Wise man, Jolee, for all his stories.

"He tortured her," she said quietly. "He was screwing with her, Jolee, and she... I mean, she... Malak—"

"He turned her?"

Ashi nodded weakly. "I was trying to talk, but she didn't hear me, and… and…" Suddenly, she slammed her fist against the wall in anger, the clang resonating in their ears. "Malak told her I wasn't going to come!" she blurted. "He told her I'd abandoned her, and she _believed_ him!"

Jolee sighed, taking a seat next to her. "And?" he prompted. He could see that that wasn't all. It took more than a lack of faith to make Ashi like this.

"And… Malak said I was the reason she fell. That it was my darkness that tempted her first." The words were rushed and laden with confession. "If she hadn't saved me in the first place, Jolee, then she wouldn't have fallen. It's _my fault_," she finished. With no warning, all the justification she'd compiled since the Leviathan had vanished; the overwhelming guilt of being _herself_ had suddenly hit her.

Jolee looked at her for a long moment, but was perfectly calm when he spoke. "Lass," he asked—so calmly that for a moment, she almost didn't think he'd _heard_ her at all—"have you ever heard the word 'narcissism'?"

It had the effect he hoped. Ashi stopped, completely diverted.

"_What?_"

"You're overestimated your own impact. You didn't force Bastila to save you, and you aren't the reason she was attracted to the dark side. Besides," he added, with the ghost of a smile, "half the guilt is mine." She frowned skeptically, but he continued. "If I had killed you and Malak when I first saw the pair of you, then none of this would have happened." He paused, giving her time to form a dubious expression. "See? What has been can't be changed. This damn war's not my fault; this isn't yours."

"That makes no sense at all," she declared. "_Even for you._"

Jolee shook his head slowly. "Are you really this determined to believe that you're evil?"

"Evil? No," she replied immediately. "Responsible, yes."

He harrumphed. "Well, if you want to save Bastila, then you're going about it the wrong way. You're too busy worrying about what's done. Take care of the future, and the past will take care of itself."

"Do I need to worry about the future?" Ashi asked suspiciously.

Despite himself, Jolee grinned. "I think it's time for another story."

Ashi's mouth dropped open in mock horror. She had heard Jolee's stories about love, the Sith, being in love with a Sith, and blind Jedi. It seemed his time on Kashyyyk might as well have been spent collecting them for when he stopped being a hermit. "Not another one!" she protested.

"Now you just keep quiet there, you!" he replied. "I've had to put up with all your busybody questions. Now you're going to listen to a story, damn it!"

Ashi couldn't help it—she broke out laughing. Jolee looked pleased, in the brief moment before he sighed deeply. "Now, where was I? Oh, yes, the story—you almost made me forget about it. Nice try," he chuckled, "but I'm not that old yet."

"_Really?_"

"Hush! Now then: a young man sees a terribly venomous snake in his small village. Nervous, he watches it carefully until it leaves. The young man follows the snake into the forest. He clears branches from its path and helps it over obstacles; he even helps to keep it fed."

"This is a very long story."

"I said shush!" He cleared his throat. "Many nights pass, and the young man continues to follow the snake, out into the sands of the great desert. In the desert, the snake grows hungry: it eventually turns and bites the young man. The poison quickly works its way into his body.

"Finally, curious, the snake looks back at the young man, and asks, 'Why were you foolish enough to follow me out into the desert?' The young man replies, "Did I follow you? I thought I was leading you away from everyone else…'

"And then he died."

"How depressing," Ashi said, but then hesitated, drawing back from the question she had to ask. "So… I'm the snake?"

"That's what I'm trying to see for myself."

She raised her eyebrows, surprised at the indefinite response. "And what do you think?"

"So far, I don't think so. But I know we haven't reached the desert yet."

"Damn," she muttered, "do you practice being cryptic, or does it come with age?"

He sighed. "You've got a great destiny before you, lass. That does not mean, however, that it is already written. They are not the same thing. You have a choice of the way your destiny will go. More so that engine-sucking Andor, certainly, but even he had a choice."

The reference to an earlier story made her laugh, but then she paused. "So I'm going to choose whether or not I'm the snake?"

"I'm not here to tell you what to do," he replied innocently. "You can make the choice for yourself. I'm just here to offer my help... if you ask for it."

The question demanded to be asked—she couldn't help it, _really_. "Why?"

He snorted. "Because I think it's important," he said gruffly. "More so, anyway, than staying a hermit and pretending the galaxy doesn't exist. That's why I'm here, and as long as I can help, I'm planning on staying."

Ashi smiled. "Thanks, Jolee. I'm…" She paused, and then added quietly, "I'm glad you came."

He rolled his eyes, but a twitch at the corner of his lips betrayed how pleased he really was. "Bah," he muttered, "you're making me sentimental. But… I'm rather glad I came too," he admitted. "You're a good lass." A smile crinkled his old face, but then he added quickly, "Now, it's late and I'm old, and I need my sleep. I've had enough questions for one night."

Ashi could take a hint. She rolled back over and closed her eyes; the last thing she heard was him standing creakily, and his slow footsteps clomping out the door. The Ebon Hawk was silent, and only disturbed once: when a figure in a bright orange flight jacket stopped at the door to the medbay on his way to his bunk. A rectangle of light had spilled from the open doorway; his shadow blocked it as he stood a moment, eyes on the figure curled on the bed. He stayed just long enough to be reassured by her even breathing—_she's sleeping; all right, great, she's just sleeping, she's _fine—and then hurried away.

* * *

Against Ashi's wishes, they sought out the Republic base the next day. She would have preferred not to go, but they had too many questions, and it seemed like the best place to get answers. Unfortunately, though, the information came with a catch. The head of the embassy, a tall, drawling man called Roland Wann, apparently knew a little about everything—the Star Map, Sunry, and the missing Selkath—but wasn't telling unless she and her friends did them a favor.

An information retrieval droid carrying some kind of data—Wann let the words 'Hrakert Station' slip before he caught himself—had been taken by the Sith. They had to get it back as soon as possible or, according to Wann, bad, ambiguous things would happen. Ashi reluctantly agreed to help, and offered to slice herself a passcard; the other quick way in was to torture a prisoner, and that seemed awfully Sith-like to her.

Wann eagerly let her into the computer lab, clear proof he didn't know her very well yet. To her credit, she did sit down at a console, but didn't even glance at the passcards. There was some kind of file in the computer that was locked, evidently off-limits, which was basically an open invitation for her to hack it. Better yet, it was labeled with Sunry's name.

There was one interesting thing in the file: video footage from the room. Ashi opened it and then bit down a moan of disgust—Firith had been right: the couple was definitely physical. She skipped ahead hurriedly, and found the two of them asleep. Carefully, she sped up the footage until she caught movement.

She watched Sunry stand and dress, before lifting his blaster. Elassa was lying on the bed, a warm smile on her sleeping face. He took aim—and fired.

Blood, dark to the black and white camera, stained the sheets, and Sunry took off. Ashi closed the file—she had seen enough—but downloaded it quickly. There wasn't likely to be better evidence than this.

Then, someone cleared their throat behind her.

Luckily, the technician hadn't seen her taking the video, but they could at least tell she wasn't making herself a passcard. She was kicked out of the computer lab instantly, and shot the Republic people several dirty looks as she left. There was only one good way into the Sith base now—the violent one. Her only condolence was that there was no time for it today. Wann's devastatingly important mission would just have to wait until tomorrow.

She made her way back to the ship, but there was little to do there. Everyone was still trying to get over the shock of Bastila's fall, and for the most part, failing miserably. Even Mission looked gloomy, stunned that someone so consistently _good_ could possibly now be fully set on killing them. Ashi had given up on moping already, though, in favor of forming a plan. She hadn't been able to talk to Bastila before; surely if she could just speak to her, she could at the least instill some doubt in the girl's mind.

It was an easy decision to settle down in her room to meditate—startlingly out of character for her, but easy nonetheless. Ashi closed her eyes and reached out for the bond, the mental equivalent of running her hand along a hem and catching a thread. Once she sensed it, she tugged at it, and it widened, a little rip that tore through the edge of her mind. The next part was much harder: with the utmost care, Ashi sent a little piece of her consciousness reaching through the hole with a small nudge—physically, across time and space, but mentally, just a little stretch. She didn't bother trying to conceal herself; the whole point was to talk.

_Bastila?_ she called uncertainly. Who was to say if this even worked? For all she knew, Bastila was blocking her out complet—

_Revan._

The reply came cold and unexpected as a flash freeze, far too sudden to be surprised. With a little jolt, Ashi realized the other girl had been waiting, or at least ready for her. She took a slow breath.

_That's not my name, Bastila._

Bastila scoffed. _Is that truly what you are telling yourself? You are a fool, Revan. You cannot hide from what you were._

Unknown to Ashi, her fists clenched, fingernails digging into her palms. _Key word there is 'were'. As in, past tense. It's not what I am._

_You're forgiven yourself rather easily, haven't you?_ Bastila observed coldly. _Is it really so easy to forget all the lives you stole, all the dreams you crushed? Look at your crew. So many of them suffered because of you, Revan. Carth, Dustil, and Missions' worlds were destroyed; Canderous lost his war and his people; Jolee's wife betrayed him. Look at all you have done._

Out of nowhere, a wave of guilt crashed over Ashi; for a moment, it was so physically painful that she struggled to breathe. Words, stronger than any material chains, wound themselves around her mind, tightening and holding fast. _Lives ruined, dreams crushed…_ Bastila was right, she was a monster… space, look what she'd _done_…

The guilt rose and swallowed her, like cold, inky water, and she was powerless. Ashi sank down into it, feeling it close over her head with finality, until then she felt nothing at all.

Far away on Lehon, a smirk widened on Bastila's face. No longer were her talents wasted. People were so foolish, so easy to manipulate. Revan would have been a challenge before, but with the bond and her already fragile mind… well, it had only a matter of time before even the former Sith Lord was helpless before her.

She frowned harder, reached just a little more, and then her scowl smoothed to a smile. She had control, sudden and satisfying. Ashi… no, _Revan's_ mind and body were hers; she would remember nothing from now on. Of course, if things went right, then she would never remember anything ever again…

* * *

"Ashi?"

It took a couple minutes to establish she wasn't on the ship, and a few seconds after that for all of them to start panicking. Given what had happened only a couple days ago, they knew she was already vulnerable—thanks to a combination of the parasitic bond and her Revan reality shock—and her mind was horribly fragile. Within minutes they were all out searching Ahto City, even Carth, who was trying his best to pretend he didn't care at all.

It started to rain, as they split up—first two groups, then four, and then eventually all searching on their own. Carth hurried down streets and ducked through archways, his steps speeding up with every passing minute. _What the hell is she doing?_ he wondered furiously, irrational urgency tugging him forward through side streets collecting puddles like dust.

Finally, squinting through the drops falling from hysterical skies, he caught sight of a viewing platform arching off over the water. If Ashi was in the area, maybe he could see her from there… maybe. It was a slim chance, but better than just running hopefully through the city, he told himself. Not, of course, that it mattered, and certainly not that he was worried.

Carth made his way up the steps slowly, unwillingness weighing at his feet. Icy rain pelted from the sky, flinging itself down on the soaked, sparkling city and the roaring gray sea. His jacket kept him warm, but his hair was plastered to his head, and water rolled down his face, dripping off his chin. He had given up trying to wipe it off long ago.

He took the final step, reaching the platform, and then froze.

There was no railing to it, and normally that would be safe—no one was stupid enough to go near the edge—except for today. The ground was already dangerously slippery, just waiting for a misplaced footstep to send a person tumbling into the hungry ocean's depths; its prey, oblivious, stood poised at the edge, one hand lifted slightly, as if reaching for something that hovered just outside her grasp. Her red jacket was soaked; her fiery hair hung drenched around her water-streaked face.

"Ashi!" he shouted desperately, but rolling thunder caught his voice away, she didn't seem to hear him. "No, Ashi, no, _don't!_" No thoughts were in his mind but that something was terribly wrong, that surely Ashi in her right mind would never do this…

A gust of wind sent raindrops flying at her, stinging like ice. She leaned forward ever so slightly, unaware of the drop waiting beneath her.

It never came.

Carth sprinted across the platform, boots skidding on the wet ground, and grabbed her arms, yanking her away. His hands were on her shoulders, shaking her roughly, but she was lifeless under his touch, a doll with glass eyes.

"Ashi?" His hands moving to her face, forcing her to meet his gaze, but she just stared with the unseeing gaze of a sleepwalker. This wasn't Ashi, this _couldn't_ be Ashi…

He would never have done it, had he been thinking. But all he could see was her blank, vacant gaze and those horrible empty eyes, usually so full of life and all the worse because of that. Carth Onasi stood there in the rain, fear and concern racing unbidden and unwelcome through him, and did the first thing he could think of.

He kissed her.

* * *

**Okay. Well. Not Carth's brightest idea, but nobody likes him because of his intelligence, anyway. Feel free to review and contradict me... or demand to know what happens next... it's all good. One thing I will tell you, though: Ashi doesn't take it particularly well...  
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	25. Fracture

**Hey everyone! My life's still pretty explosive, but most of the fireworks have burned themselves out, so the next chapters *should be* pretty soon. Thanks for your patience, and the reviews--nothing's a better pick-me-up than those :)  
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**If this gets confusing, then it's because I'm naturally an overthinker. Lots of artistic interpretation of exactly how the Force works is in store (but a little bit of violence, too, so there should be something for everyone). Anyway, enjoy!  
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**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR**

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* * *

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**Fracture: the act of breaking; the state of being broken**

Ashi's lips were wet and cold, slick with rain, and for a moment a part of Carth demanded to know what he thought he was doing, but then she stiffened in his arms. For a moment, she was kissing him back—just a moment, but he thought it counted for a lot more than it sounded like—but then she jerked back, gasping for breath. Her hand was lightning-fast, and he only felt his head snap back, pain erupting through his cheek below his eye. He was almost expecting another blow—knowing Ashi, one not to the face but to somewhere even more painful—but when she raised her hand again, it wavered in midair, her eyes widening in surprise.

"_Carth_?"

He glanced down at her hopefully. "Yes?"

Her face contorted with anger, and for a split second he had time to suspect he'd just made it worse. This time he did see it coming, but it didn't hurt any less for that. Her fist connected with his nose with an agonizing crunch; a moment later he tasted blood, metallic and salty, beginning to drip down his face, trickling off his lip with the rain. Despite all that, his first thought was a dazed sort of respect. She really could throw a punch, he observed, in the instant before her voice cut through the howling storm like a knife.

"What the _frack_ are you _doing_?"

She'd already known it was him, sort of: that was to say, if she'd thought about it during the kiss, she might have realized. Now, however it was a little late. Besides, suddenly being kissed by a stranger was bad enough, but suddenly being kissed by him… he had no _right!_ There was a very clear line—a very _recent,_ very clear line—and he was a mile past it.

"I could ask you the same thing," he snapped, pulling back. She was staring at him with blazing fury, but it was so much better than the haunting stare that he couldn't help relief. Her cheeks flamed with anger… and something very like embarrassment. He knew he probably looked the same. Neither of them wanted to admit to the moment when the kiss had been mutual.

"Being assaulted, I think," she spat. "That's _one_ thing they call it when someone kisses you against your will."

He froze, horrified. "I wasn't taking advantage of you!"

"Weren't you? And where exactly do you draw the line, Carth?"

He stumbled for words under her venomous glare. If she was at all aware of the rain pouring down upon the two of them, she didn't show it, but based on her expression, he wouldn't have been surprised if it had started thundering. "Do you remember what just happened?"

She raised an eyebrow fractionally, ignoring the raindrops trickling like tears down her cheeks. "Uh, yeah. There was a reason I _punched_ you."

_Twice, _he thought, but instead prompted, "Before that?"

Ashi blinked, momentarily sidetracked. "I… I don't know," she said, almost to herself. "I was in the Hawk, meditating—trying to reach Bastila," she added quickly, by way of an excuse. "I did, though; I heard her, but then…" Her voice trailed off. She bit her lip in confusion. "I don't remember anything else. Until…"

Immediately, she was reminded of why she had been angry. Carth saw a glare beginning to form on her face again, and spoke without thinking.

"Then you don't remember that you were going to jump?"

It came out harsher than he intended, and his words had the effect of sticking a pin in a balloon. Ashi deflated immediately: her eyes, narrowed and flashing a moment ago, widened in shock, and she went very pale.

"I was… _what?_" She turned slowly, and took a couple careful steps closer to the edge, mind racing morbid and unbidden. If she had fallen, would she have died unknowing, her last memory one of guilt? Or would she have woken up as she fell, or as she hit the water, icy waves shocking her back to herself the same way Carth's kiss had? That would be even worse: to be suddenly drowning, choking, _sinking_…

"Suicide?" she whispered, the roar of the waves rendering her speechless but for one word.

Carth was busy feeling immediately guilty—in retrospect, it would have been much kinder to break that news gently and somewhere else—but nodded, before realizing she couldn't see him. "I stopped you," he explained lamely.

"And after that?" Her voice was pure venom. "Decide you'd earned a little reward?"

"You… there was something wrong with you!" he protested. "You looked like you weren't all there, Ashi! I didn't mean… I wasn't thinking—"

Ashi spun to face him, and this time, she didn't look angry: she looked shocked, even disgusted. "You weren't _thinking_?" she echoed in disbelief. "You see me about to jump off a fracking building, you figure out that there's something wrong with me, and your first thought is to _kiss_ me—and then your goddamn excuse is that you weren't _thinking_?"

He couldn't answer. It sounded so stupid when she said it like that, so… so cruel. "I can't believe you," she hissed, shoving past him; it wasn't a hard push, but he reeled back nonetheless, caught off guard. She stormed down the stairs, tossing her soaked hair over her shoulder as she stalking into the gleaming labyrinth of the city, and it was all Carth could do to follow her, shamefaced. He was silent all the way back.

* * *

About half the crew was already there when Ashi and Carth arrived, and more returned as Jolee began to question the two. Unfortunately, neither could—or wanted to—explain what had happened, especially why Carth had been nursing what had been rapidly becoming a fantastic black eye when he arrived. It turned out, however, that they didn't need to. As soon as Ashi mentioned that the last thing she remembered was talking to Bastila, Jolee's lips pressed into a sudden, harsh line, questions firmly locked behind them. To her annoyance, he told her what she needed most was rest, before leaving her in the medbay and gathering the crew separately to talk.

Carth was the first to speak, as soon as they were sure Ashi was out of earshot. "All right," he hissed to Jolee, "what the hell just happened?"

The old man sighed. "I think," he said tiredly, "that Bastila has learned to possess."

Whatever that meant, it obviously meant something to Juhani and Dustil. Both of their mouths dropped open, but Dustil was the first to find his voice.

"_How?_" he demanded. "That's hard to do anyway; how in space is she doing it if she's so far a… _oh_." He stopped suddenly, his eyes widening. "The bond?"

Jolee nodded, but Carth interrupted. "What's possession?"

"We learned it at the academy," Dustil said, glancing away—he always became incapable of meeting anyone's eyes when his past training was mentioned. "Some of my friends were, anyway; I wasn't advanced enough. It's a really dark power: it lets you take over someone's mind and body. Usually, you'd need to be close to them—like, physically, I mean—but with a bond, I guess that doesn't apply."

All the non-Force users were staring at him. "Bastila's _controlling_ Ash?" gasped Mission, struggling with the very concept. But then again, she struggled with the thought of Ashi jumping off buildings into oceans, and that wasn't so impossible any more.

Carth nodded tersely. "That makes sense. When I saw her, she looked wrong—like she wasn't all there."

"Yeah," Dustil agreed, "yeah, that's how they look. Zombie-like." He paused, and then a slight frown flitted across his face. "How'd you snap her out of it, though? It usually takes a huge shock or something."

Carth went suddenly red, and cleared his throat awkwardly. There was a brief moment of silence, in which everyone jumped to immediate conclusions, and then Juhani spoke up, much to the soldier's relief.

"What I do not understand," she said slowly, "is how Bastila was able to influence Ashi in such a way. The bond gives her an advantage, but Ashi has great strength of will. Surely she could not be possessed with such ease."

Jolee raised his eyebrows, seeming surprised that no one else could work it out. "Is that really so hard?" he demanded, looking vaguely disappointed, but none of them seemed to have an answer. He glanced around once at all the urgent stares, and gave an irritable huff. "_Really._ Why did Malak want Bastila in the first place?"

"_Oh,_" repeated Dustil suddenly, eyes widening. "Battle Meditation," he clarified for everyone else, giving them a moment to feel oblivious before he continued. "It's more precise on individuals. If she used _that_…" His voice trailed off, but it was obvious he was wondering if Ashi could really fight Bastila off now. Then, unexpectedly, his face lit up.

"But we could use this too, couldn't we?" he said, sudden animation in his eyes. "If Malak's using Bastila to take over Ashi, couldn't we use Ashi to spy on Bastila…?"

He stopped. Everyone was staring at him with varied levels of disgust. "_Use_ her?" echoed Carth. "She's not a _tool_!"

Jolee gave the young boy a reproachful look. "We don't need to stoop to Malak's level just for information," he replied. "How wise is it to ask Ashi for something like that—to ask her to act like a Sith for us?"

Dustil flushed and began to inspect the floor with newfound interest. However, Juhani glanced up at Jolee, with a strange eagerness in her yellow eyes.

"Perhaps," she began carefully, "it is wrong to ask Ashi for such a thing. Doubtless it is a bad idea to ask her to fall back on her darker instincts. But one of us"—and here she gestured to herself and Jolee—"could access Bastila's mind through her, could we not? If one of us were to connect with her through the Force," she explained, turning to the rest of the crew, "we could use her mind as… as a bridge, if you will."

"_No._"

The word was low and harsh, but it carried such intensity that it might as well have been shouted. Carth gazed at the Cathar with unveiled disgust. "Have you forgotten what almost happened? What she almost _did_?" he demanded heatedly. "Ashi has enough to deal with without you messing around inside her head—"

Canderous cut him off with a snort. "Republic, if you want more of what you got on Tatooine, then go ask," he said calmly. Carth reddened, a sea of protests rising to his lips, but the Mandalorian cut him off to continue. "But don't underestimate her. She's stronger than you give her credit for."

"I know she's strong!" Carth exploded. "That doesn't give them the right to go in her mind!" He scowled viciously at all three of the Jedi and then Canderous, adding as an afterthought, "And I don't want anything to do with _that_, you—"

"Well," interrupted a voice.

All eyes swung to the doorway, where Ashi stood, arms crossed and one eyebrow fractionally raised. They were left to assume that it was at Carth's words. "That would be your loss, I think," she said tartly, and, if possible, the soldier turned an even brighter scarlet. Ignoring him, she turned to Jolee. "He's right," she said. "I don't want you using me. I want to spy on Bastila myself."

Surprisingly, it was Mission who spoke first. "Are you kidding?" she snapped, mouth dropping open disbelief. "You nearly died, Ash! You can't—"

"I nearly die most days," said Ashi matter-of-factly, brushing her off. So unused to being shoved aside by Ashi, even verbally, Mission fell silent. "I want to do it myself," Ashi repeated. "I don't want you in my mind."

It was so brief that almost no one saw it. For a moment, as she spoke, her eyes flashed with something more than determination: shame. She wasn't worried about her mind itself—it was that she didn't want them seeing what was in it.

Jolee looked at her for a long moment, eyes flat and unreadable. "Can you manage it?" he said finally, and Ashi understood what he meant.

"It's not possession," she replied. "All I'm doing is looking. There's nothing dark about that."

And in the end, there was nothing they could do to talk her out of it. Ashi went with Jolee to the medbay; maybe it wasn't particularly glamorous, but it seemed to be the quietest place on the ship. He had agreed to mediate for her: if, at any point, Bastila sensed Ashi, he would be able to intervene. Ashi wasn't quite sure how—mostly, she suspected that he felt the need to do something to help. In his place, she probably would have too.

She could feel his consciousness as she knelt on the ground, eyes closed. It hovered close to her mind, but not too close; a gentle mass that would have been a rich, earthy green, had it had a color. She couldn't sense his thoughts, just his aura: unsurprised, resigned, and a little worried anyway.

She edged away from her mind, reaching out with all the care she could manage for the bond. Her fingers, resting on her knees, were trembling. For a moment, she paused, and then she gave a little tug at the fabric of her mind.

It split, and Ashi felt the tiny change as Bastila's consciousness touched hers, mingling in an estuary of thought. Now came the hardest part. Slowly, with the utmost caution, she sent a tendril of thought into the other girl's mind. She could feel Jolee behind her, and she led the way. It wasn't guiding—she went quickly, apathetic as to whether he kept up or not. If he stayed, then he could figure out a way to help; if he fell behind, then he could leave, and she would manage on her own. She didn't want, intentionally, to push him away, but there was a small part of her that wished that her mind could just be hers, even from Jolee.

He could probably sense that part. That was just as well. It was good for them to remember that, regardless of whether or not she was helpful, she wasn't their tool.

Carth had defended her on that topic. She wondered idly if it had been guilt, but shrugged the thought quickly away. This took concentration… this took… _focus…_

"…_Forgive me, master."_

Ashi jumped; rather than the inside of her eyelids, she suddenly saw Malak, glaring at her in all his glory. Luckily, Jolee was not caught off guard so easily. She felt the brush of the shield he conjured quickly, hiding her presence from Bastila. Fine—if he was here, then it was good that he could help.

"_You have failed me," he said slowly. "Failure is not something that will be tolerated, Bastila."_

_She knelt there before him, and he towered over her, painting himself godlike to anyone watching. Ashi, who had always had a soft spot for theatrics, appreciated it, but a stray, instantaneous thought about arrogance flitted through Bastila's head, a degree of irreverence that stunned Ashi. This was far from the Jedi brat she'd known. _

_However, inwardly bold as she might be, Bastila didn't contradict him. He was looking at her—she felt his yellow gaze burning holes in the crown of her head—and she did not dare look up at him, not while he held the power. "I understand, Master. I apologize. I underestimated her companions."_

"_I see." He turned away, gazing off unseeingly. "Which one saved her?"_

"_The soldier. Carth Onasi," Bastila explained, her voice inflectionless. "He cares deeply for Revan, master. I should have anticipated that he would try and protect her."_

_Furtively, her eyes darted upwards as she spoke; all three of them saw Malak's fists clench at the words, and all three drew their own conclusions. His knuckles whitened, forcing the dark veins to stand out all the more against his pale, sickly skin. "Indeed," he said slowly. "I hope you will not be so foolish in future."_

_Relief, rich and tangible, flooded through Bastila, but she kept her voice even. "Thank you, Master. What would you have me do with Revan?"_

_The Dark Lord turned his back to her, dark cape swishing behind him. His footsteps, clicking against the dark stone, were painfully loud in the silence of the temple. "I will not underestimate her again," he murmured, lacing his fingers together behind his back. "I do not think another attempt this extreme will succeed—no doubt she has figured out what we intended to do. Prepared, she will fight you off."_

"_Then what shall I do?"_

_From the sound of his voice, he turned back to face her, although now Bastila kept her eyes fixed firmly on the cold stone before her. "Do not attempt to possess her," he instructed. "Simply… influence her." She heard him pause, and when he spoke again it was surer, as if he'd realized he liked what he'd said. "There is darkness within her, whether she and her Jedi choose to acknowledge it or not. If you can drive her to confront it, then perhaps she will give in to it again."_

_Ashi was hardly breathing. Beside her—metaphysically speaking—she could feel Jolee's sudden dismay as well, hard as he tried to hide it. No one had faith in her, did they?_

_Tersely, Bastila nodded. "Very well, master. I understand."_

_The Dark Lord turned to face her again, his eyes glimmering with satisfaction. "Very good, Bastila…" he said_, and then the entire scene blurred and faded as Ashi pulled away from Bastila's mind. Malak's words were still ringing in her head, a dry, almost serpentine whisper that refused to fade—_there is darkness within her… she will give in again…_

Ashi's eyes flew open, with the flood of dizziness that often accompanied sudden snaps to reality. Jolee was looking down at her, and she saw a tint of worry in his tired face. She sat back on her heels, eyes stinging as they fell to the floor.

Malak was right, of course: there was darkness in her. There always would be. She examined herself uncertainly, holding a hand out before her to see if her veins looked too pronounced. Distracted, she saw but didn't fully register the fact that her fingers were shaking like twigs in a hurricane.

Could she feel the dark side again, a stain buried under her skin? And what a stain—even the most powerful of the Jedi couldn't get it out. The darkness was as much a part of her as her skin or her blood, the latter of which was currently thudding like a drum in her ears, pulsing hard through her pale hands. She felt diseased.

_You shouldn't exist. You should be dead._

This voice wasn't Bastila's. It was her own, but moreover, it was right. She'd seen herself die: she remembered it, and she had the souvenir of the explosion tattooed as proof across her back. She wasn't even sure if she'd been sorry, not even then—scared of death and what was coming, yes; angry, yes; but not _sorry_. She's never chosen a redemption, and she hadn't deserved to be saved.

It was at that moment when something shifted behind Ashi's dark, wide eyes, the starved logic of desperation. Jolee saw her shoulders tense from behind, and held his breath, wishing he could see her face. Maybe, came a whisper in the back of her mind, she could still do something about this. She hadn't deserved to be saved, and likely didn't now, but she could still change that. A redemption she'd _earned_ could mean something—more, at least, than this half-baked one that fell apart in her hands.

There was something glimmering inside of her, something that Jolee, still half-caught in her mind, regarded warily. A little spark of light blue had suddenly sparked into being. Before, her consciousness had been thick with doubt, even anger; now the light was glowing from the middle, and it worried him even more. She'd had an idea, and he doubted, after this day, that it could be anything good.

_If she could make things better, set them right, then maybe it could... balance what she'd done before._ Ashi clung to the words as they came, terrified to lose them._ She had to prove Malak wrong, was the point; her actions were hers to control, _not_ Bastila's to toy with. _Furious, righteous purpose was rushing through her, sowing a smile across her face, and it poured easily across any gaps in the reasoning. They were irrelevant. The _point_ was that she had a chance, a real, fighting one_... damn,_ she'd needed to know that.

As Jolee watched, the blue wavered and then grew a couple inches, flames catching on wood. Anxious, he pulled away, blinking and finding himself fully back inside his skin. "Lass?" he asked.

Ashi lips split in anticipation of a smile. "I'm fine," she replied, and she was—better. His doubt, methodically cultivated, was so clear she could almost taste it, but she didn't bother to comment. "I'm _fine_," she repeated, daring him to contradict her.

He didn't, and she stood, turning and brushing past him out the door. He watched her worriedly as she breezed around the corner. There was a grin across her lips, screaming of purpose, and it was far more frightening than even her silence had been.

* * *

Day one of _not_ confronting her inner darkness: so far, Ashi decided, so good.

The Sith base, contrary to popular opinion, hadn't been so difficult to get into. Okay, so there was the red steam that both Ashi _and_ Dustil had tried to walk through—to no avail, until it occurred to them to use Force speed—and the many, many, _many_ Sith and droids, but it was a good day. They'd gotten Wann's probe, and she'd finally gotten to kill something on this damn planet. Now there was just one thing left to do.

All her senses had been on a constant high alert all day. It was almost like being on a stim, but it didn't wear off at all, and was far more of a mental than a physical state. She had kept her mind forcibly shielded and aware all day, and that meant that while she hadn't actually felt Bastila yet, she was the one to sense an unusual amount of auras clumped at the southern end of the base. She, Dustil, and Juhani had made a mutual decision to go see what it was. Carth had disagreed, but subsequently been outvoted, and now trailed along after them in a sulky sort of way.

They reached a new section of the base—lower, sloping down to the ocean—and Ashi waved open a door. It was strangely quiet for the amount of turmoil she could sense around them, and she felt slightly lost with no noise to illustrate a path. She closed her eyes, tapping into the Force. She could feel auras nearby, but 'nearby' wasn't nearly good enough. Frustrated, she forced her consciousness outward, searching through the air for direction, life, _anything_.

She opened her eyes… and then she _saw._

It was as if a slide of color had been superimposed over the world—or a veil been lifted from her eyes. The physical world dimmed to gray, but she could suddenly see threads and clumps of color that wove through the air. Moreover, she could sense the auras through the walls: not what was there, but the tone it bore, its essence. It was beautiful, dazzling, overwhelming… there were no words to possibly do it justice. It was life itself in motion.

She was vaguely aware that she had something she had to do besides gape, but couldn't remember it until a voice behind her startled her. "Ashi?" said the radiance that was Dustil. "Which way?"

She took a deep breath, and forced herself to concentrate. Red was the prominent color here, especially in a clump off to her left, but—_there_—a flicker of green. It resembled a candle in a gale, wavering in the moment before it faded completely, and she knew the aura didn't have long to last.

"Come on!" she called, and hurried forward. Her feet slapped the floor as she ran down a corridor, skidding at the corner and flying towards a door. A wave of her hand sent it sliding open, in time for her to teeter to a stop, narrowly avoiding tripping over a body.

The sight that met their eyes was horrible. Corpses lay on the ground, burned and mangled to a sickening degree. Limbs lay at strange angles, and drying blood pooled around a couple bodies. All of them were the Selkath equivalent of teenagers.

Going pale, Ashi swallowed hard, her hand tightening on the doorframe. A moment later, Dustil appeared behind her, and he was not so quiet.

"Frack," he murmured, eyes wide with horror. "That's… that's…"

But it defied adjectives. There was only one word coming to mind, and it echoed over and over, etching itself into his head: _Selene, Selene, Selene._ It was all he could do to stop it at the word, and not to dwell on whether something like this had happened on Korriban as well…

He glanced up at Ashi without thinking; he was so used to her supplying the confidence for the group. She was staring around the room, her gaze unfocused but somehow purposeful.

Carth and Juhani turned the corner. Juhani gave a little gasp, and Carth choked, "_Space…_."

"Shut up," Ashi said, without looking at him. The words held no inflection whatsoever, no anger, but Carth's mouth dropped open anyway in indignation.

"What do you mean, shut up? This is—"

She stepped into the room and bent down by a Selkath who lay on her stomach. "Shut _up_," she warned again, with the slightest edge, and he fell silent. She turned the body onto its back, her eyes roving over the corpse. She was still seeing with the Force, and she was sure she'd caught a spark of green—she couldn't be mistaken, she _couldn't_ be…

There! A little flicker of light, breaking the gray fog of the room for a moment. She pressed a hand to the Selkath's heart, and bit her lip—she should be focusing and only that, but a sliver of her was hoping desperately as well. _Live_, she thought frantically. _Please, live…_

Light sparked at her fingertips, and she saw it work its way into the body, dabbing away patches of red like water washing off paint. The green wavered in the center of the girl's chest, and then, suddenly, violently, the body spasmed. The Selkath girl's webbed hand flew through the air, clenching on Ashi's arm with an iron grip. The shock was enough to snap Ashi back to her normal vision, taking the color and clarity with it, and for a second she even had time to miss it before the girl spoke.

/Tell… Shasa…/ she croaked. A wracking cough exploded from somewhere deep within her chest, and blood, dark and oily, tricked from the corner of her mouth. "Tell her… the Sith…/

Ashi shook her head, pushing the girl back down to the ground. "Stay still," she hissed, the words fiercer than she intended. "I can heal you if—"

/No/ whispered the girl, her eyes huge and childlike. /It's… too late… please… the datapad… we figured it out… but they… caught us…_ tell Shasa…_/

Her other hand—burned so badly that the skin was scorched and black—rose, and Ashi realized she was clutching a charred datapad. She looked at it in confusion for a moment, eyebrows drawing together in uncertainty, but as she raised her head to ask what it was, the girl's eyes became glassy. In a final, shuddering gasp, the last breath of air left her body.

Ashi stared at her for a long moment, unable to look away more than anything else. Romantics could say corpses looked peaceful, like sleepers, but there was so many wounds on the girl that it hardly applied. Her eyes were fearful and haunted, and even in death, Ashi felt like the corpse was staring at her. With tentative care, she reached over and closed the girl's eyes. She could feel the stares of all her friends on her, and ignored them.

Hesitantly, she pried the fingers back, taking the datapad from the girl's hand. It didn't take long to realize what it was, and she snorted, pocketing it. Sith really needed to find better places to keep their grand plans.

And then Ashi stood and left the room, brushing past the other three, and turned down the hallway. There were a few rooms, but she knew where she'd seen the most red, and anyway, she could hear gurgled voices coming from the far one as she drew closer. There was no point in subtlety, really, so she waved the door calmly open as she approached.

A group of Selkath started simultaneously and then stared at her, a couple of the more quick-thinking ones reaching for weapons. Ashi glanced around at them levelly, her own hand resting centimeters from her lightsaber. It was a promise, not a threat. "Which one of you is Shasa?" she asked, before they could manage a word.

Still, the staring. It was slightly disappointing. /How the hell did you get in here?/ demanded a teen, finally.

"From your hangar. But I'll be leaving through the front doors," Ashi replied calmly. "Are any of you Shasa?"

A girl stepped forward, eyes narrowed and challenging. Ashi gave her the instant once-over. She was tall, but that stemmed more from posture than true height. Both her slight air of contempt and the lightsaber on her hand were proof that she was more accomplished than most of her peers. /That's me/ the girl said coldly, after making a show of scrutinizing Ashi as well. /Who wants to know?/

"Your father."

This caused an instant clamor. /I knew it!/ moaned a boy. /I knew your dad would screw this up, Shasa!/

/Shut up!/ she snapped, and he fell silent. /My father's a fool./ She lifted her chin, giving Ashi a scornful look. The lightsaber blade, blood red, hissed from its sheath; Ashi found the gesture slightly melodramatic, but Shasa's peers seemed impressed. /If you think you're taking me back—taking any of us back—/ added the girl as an afterthought, /then you'd better think again, stranger. We are Sith. No one commands us!/

"Except the Force," threw in Dustil. Ashi blinked, realizing this group must strike a nerve for him. Shasa's eyes narrowed.

/That's it!/ she snarled. /Our masters will reward us greatly for the deaths of these fools./

For a neutral world, the teens were bloodthirsty. Any of them not already armed grabbed for weapons immediately, and many smiled as they approached the group. The first to lunge, naturally, was Shasa, but to Ashi's surprise, it was not at her. She leapt at Dustil, who only just had his blade out in time to stop her. The Selkath held back for a moment; eager for a fight though they might be, clever comebacks beforehand interested them just as much.

/We control the Force/ she roared. /You are weak, Jedi!/

"Control?" he muttered. "Is that what they're calling it now?"

Shasa shrieked and flung him into the wall. Ashi heard the nasty, muffled _clang_ of impact, but couldn't stop to look. The students had taken their leader's cue, and were pouring down on them in a tidal wave of fishiness. To Ashi, waves of Sith fish ranked right up there with waves of Sand People on a list of things she didn't enjoy running into. Unfortunately, she didn't really have an option with this one besides

She met the first wave with a shield, and they bounced off it like it was rubber. Quickly, she forced it outward, flinging the majority of them into the wall. There were at least twice as many of them, and she knew this time they'd be able to block her. The only advantage she had was the first strike—and then again, probably skill.

Two of them were on her as soon as she reached them, and leapt into the fight, dodging and swinging. She kicked one student in the jaw, and he went reeling. The next had his blaster knocked out of his hand, and cowered. She was brushing past him as she heard Dustil cry out.

Dustil, several meters away, was pinned against the wall. Shasa loomed over him: even regular-height Selkath were taller than humans as a rule, and compared to Dustil, the girl looked far too dangerous. Ashi knew, without the shadow of a doubt, he was a good fighter, but that was just it—though he would make a brilliant Guardian, but he couldn't fight Force attacks yet.

Shasa could tell. He struggled to stand, a trickle of blood tracing his set jaw, and she grinned. Dustil cried out suddenly, and Ashi hesitated for an instant—Shasa hadn't touched him—but then she saw the faraway look in his eyes, terror and despair mingling together into paralysis, and knew that the girl hadn't needed to.

Fury came instantly, hot and delicious as it burned through her veins. Who needed stims when you had kids in trouble?

It was his son's unmistakable cry that jerked Carth away from the Selkath he was fighting as helplessly as a marionette. His eyes flicked around, half rational and half panicked, and lit on Dustil: backed against the wall, being approached by the lead Selkath.

Instantaneously, he took aim, but to his surprise, Ashi was already there, sending Shasa flying down the hallway. Dustil sagged in relief, and Carth stared. Ashi had saved his son's life. It felt very unfair, because it was much harder to hate someone who did that.

As the thought was racing irritably through his head, Ashi was furiously dueling Shasa. The girl must have been Force-reliant, for while she had looked threatening, towering over Dustil, she wasn't very strong, and her arms shook with the effort of fending off the attacks. Ashi, meanwhile, was in a new mindset. The fight had taken on a new level of delicious clarity. She would kill Shasa, she would kill _all_ the Selkath, if they dared threaten her friends…

Quite suddenly, she froze with revelation. She was, frankly, shocked. For the first time, Ashi knew the feel of a Sith using subtlety—and if they fought all their battles this way, they could rule the galaxy. For a split second—the girl darted away to safety after that, but it was enough—she felt Bastila's voice in her head, urging her on. It was so easy to kill, so appallingly tempting, but if Bastila wanted Ashi to do this, then she sure as hell wouldn't.

"Stop!" she shouted, above the noise of the fray. "Stop fighting!"

Her friends only half-obeyed: though they lowered their weapons momentarily, the Selkath paid no notice, and they were forced to keep fighting within instants. There was only one thing to do. Ashi pushed Shasa back, and then flicked off her lightsaber.

Predictably, the girl lunged for her. Ashi jerked a hand forward, weaving the Force in front of her like a net, and it caught the Selkath, snaring her with her lightsaber an inch from Ashi's chest.

"I don't want to fight you."

Shasa twisted, squirming, but she was hopelessly caught. /Let me go, you coward!/ she shouted, struggling to save face. /Why should I believe you?/

Ashi let down the shield, and Shasa stumbled back in surprise. "Because," she replied, "people who want to kill people don't let the other people have an open shot at killing them." She paused, and then amended, "Unless they're stupid."

Most of the Selkath had left off fighting, too interested in what was suddenly happening. One, who hadn't caught on yet, sprang at Carth, but he swatted at it reflexively with a blaster, and the teen crumpled to the ground. No one paid him any notice.

/What do you want?/ demanded Shasa. She tried to lunge again, but Ashi threw up another shield, pushing her back.

"I'm trying to save you," she replied. "You're making it hard."

/We don't need _saving_/ Shasa sneered. /The Sith are training us. We're going to be stronger than any of you pathetic Republic soldiers soon!/

"Training you. Uh-huh. They didn't, by any chance, mention overthrowing the Republic and then respectfully leaving the planet?"

/No, they… oh./ Shasa started angrily, but it slipped quickly from her face, swapped in an instant for confusion. /How do you know that?/

Ashi didn't reply, simply reaching for the datapad and offering it to the Selkath. Shasa took it hesitantly and glanced at it. It was obvious she intended to do only that, but something must have caught her eye, for she continued to stare, eyes darting back and forth across the page. As she read, disbelief spread across her face.

/Where the frack did you get this?/ she whispered, but she couldn't muster the anger that should have gone with the words.

"Off one of your friends. She died getting it. Asked me to give it to you," Ashi said quietly. "Does it make any difference?"

/Hell, yes/ Shasa murmured. /Force... we've been so stupid. They've been using us this whole time./ She turned to her friends, and her eyes were burning with anger. Ashi was sharply reminded of her own major revelation. It was bad to learn you were being used—and even worse, the more you'd cared about your cause.

/We have to leave/ she said firmly. /We have to tell the authorities what's going on./ All her friends, most looking utterly shell-shocked, nodded slowly. Shasa gave them all a once-over, nodded in approval, and then turned to Ashi. To her surprise, the Selkath girl looked puzzled more than anything else.

/Why'd you help us?/ she asked. /We tried to kill you—sorry about that, by the way—/ she interjected to Dustil, who nodded agreeably, /and you helped us anyway?/

Ashi hesitated—because, after all, she wasn't exactly going to give the _full_ reason; but at the same time, she didn't want to lie outright—and finally decided on the simplest answer.

"You deserve the truth," she said calmly. "Everyone does."

Shasa didn't seem perturbed by the ambiguous answer. Surprisingly, she nodded, as if that was the most sensible thing Ashi could have said.

/Oh/ she replied. /Thanks./

And Ashi truly meant it when she replied, "You're welcome."

* * *

"But they _arrested_ you?"

"Briefly," Ashi clarified, to Mission's shocked expression. The only thing more fun than getting in trouble was bragging about it later.

"Shasa vouched for us," Dustil added. The three of them sat in the Ebon Hawk, going over the past day for Mission's benefit. "She's actually pretty cool, for someone who tried to kill me."

"She tried to _kill _you?"

"That's what Sith do, Mission," threw in Ashi.

Dustil half grinned, but then paused, looking as if something vaguely entertaining had just occurred to him. "Wait," he said, half-raising an eyebrow. "You're planning to go represent Sunry, in front of the same judges, in two days?"

"Neutrality is a wonderful thing," Ashi replied cheerfully. "I've been proven innocent, right?"

Jolee, entering the room, announced his presence with a pointed cough, and she sighed. "Fine, Jolee; I've been proven less evil than the Sith. Same difference."

He nodded approvingly, taking a seat near them. "What's this about Sunry?"

"The trial's in two days," Ashi replied. "I'm the arbitrator, remember?" All this was said lightly, but there was worry dancing below the surface of her words like a riptide. Jolee was trying to figure out if he'd imagined it or not, when she followed up with, "So, any ideas on what I should do?"

He shuffled over to a seat and slumped into it wearily, in one of the rare moments where he seemed his age. "I can't tell you," he stated.

"Why not?"

_She had to ask. _But of course she did, Jolee reminded himself, and maybe, just slightly, he'd wanted her to. "Because if you ask again," he replied slowly, "I'm going to ask you to save him."

"Oh." Ashi nodded, her lips twisting ruefully. "Because he was your friend?"

Jolee gave a snort. "I don't know that he still is, but… I feel indebted to him," he admitted, without fully meaning to. "He's helped me out so many times—I feel that if I can, I should return the favor."

A silence followed his words, rather too profound and long for Jolee's taste. He broke it by clearing his throat loudly, following up quickly with a gruff question. "So, what _are_ you thinking of doing?"

Ashi shrugged, her gaze rising to the florescent lights as if searching for an answer there. "No idea," she said finally. She was slumped suddenly, tired; doubt seemed to weigh visibly on her, a weight tugging on her shoulders. It wasn't fair, Jolee realized belatedly, to give her even more to worry about right now.

He scrutinized her, blinking and then squinting at her aura. That was something he was good at; possibly it was a Consular thing, and most likely it was simply natural talent. However, useful or not, it was a skill he'd rather not have possessed as he focused on Ashi. Even her aura was tired and dim, draped across her frame. Before, even when she had been tired, it had always been bright with some kind of emotion, its own little fire. Now it looked, for lack of a better description, like it had burned itself out. To be fair, a little spark of the blue was still flickering somewhere near her heart, but as he suspected what it was it gave him no comfort. Justifications weren't enough to do anything more than subsist on.

It was when she wasn't doing anything that she was bad, though. At least when she was in the city, a destination in mind, she didn't look this feeble. That was her finding kindling, little twigs to snatch up and devour so that she would burn a little brighter for a moment. It wasn't any sort of solution, but he still wished she could find something to do, just so she wouldn't look so damn_ pitiful._

"Maybe you should go talk to him."

Dustil's suggestion had been offhand, but Ashi straightened eagerly. "Yeah," she agreed immediately, "_yeah_. I think I should." Jolee caught the flare in her aura as it rippled through her, a little firework of yellow that jolted her to her feet. Reenergized at the prospect of a purpose, she turned quickly for the door, but still had time to call, "Come on, Jolee," over her shoulder. The old man groaned, but managed to shoot Dustil a grateful look before he followed Ashi out of the room.

* * *

"You're Sunry?"

The weary-looking man in the cell glanced up. His eyes, previously half-closed with the stupor of boredom, flew open when they landed on Ashi and her companion. "Jolee!" he crowed, something akin to electricity giving his face a new energy. "You… what are you doing here?"

Jolee didn't reply as his gaze moved slowly over Sunry. His eyes were flat, and might as well have been glass, for all the emotion they betrayed. Finally he gave a snort of disgust. "We're the arbitrators for the case," he said coldly.

Sunry looked stunned by the rebuff, and hesitated. "That's good, isn't it? You can get me out of this mess. It's all a frame-up, you know," he added, the declaration flowing from his tongue with an ease that could have come only from hours of justification. "The Sith—"

"We know you did it," Ashi interrupted.

He stopped mid-sentence, eyes bulging almost comically. Though his mouth dropped open, no words emerged for several moments. "I… what?" he finally managed. "No, I—"

"Shot Elassa. On tape." Reaching into her pocket, Ashi pulled out a disc from her pocket and held it between her fingers, waving it for emphasis in front of the bars. "I have it right here. _That_ was stupid, by the way."

Sunry stared at her for a moment, and then his eyes darkened with anger. "So," he said, venom leeching from the words, "you think you can have me killed, just like that? Because you're so high and mighty now, eh, Jolee? Look," he added, with an injustice as sharp as broken glass, "I found out she was using me for information, and… and I snapped, all right? She didn't know I knew, so when she fell asleep, I killed her. It's not a crime!" he added angrily, for Jolee was staring at him rather like one might usually stare at a slug. "How many Sith have you killed? _Jolee_!" he snapped—now, the old man was pointedly looking anywhere but at him. "You've made mistakes! Are you going to condemn me because of mine? Or have you forgotten Namaya by now?"

That was a low blow, and Ashi saw Jolee flinch. He closed his eyes for a moment, as if the words Sunry flung at him caused him physical pain. When, he opened them, however, they were blazing. "It's different, Sunry, and you know it," he hissed. "I don't kill Sith in cold blood while they sleep!"

"There's no _difference_. Spare me the justifications, Jolee. What are you going to do for the trial?"

Instantly, Jolee's eyes glossed over, cold and reserved. "It's not my decision," he said quietly. "Talk to her, Sunry."

Reluctantly, Sunry looked over to Ashi. She had on rather the same expression as Jolee. "Well?" he prompted anxiously. "You're not going to kill me, are you? I was used," he protested—amazing, how quickly the acrimony in his voice changed to desperation—"and it was a mistake! You won't kill me for that?"

When she met his gaze, he almost wished he hadn't spoken. Her eyes flashed like lamps, meeting his with a cold, calculated disgust. He felt a shiver run down his spine when she spoke, her voice as icy as her eyes.

"The only people who deserve second chances," she said softly, "are people who'll do something with them."

"And I will!" he insisted. "All I need is you to give me that!"

Unexpectedly, her eyes softened, the ice in them thawing. No… it wasn't that it thawed: it cracked slightly, exposing the vulnerability underneath for a second. He was waiting for her to say something, but she turned instead to Jolee, murmuring something too soft for Sunry to catch. The old Jedi looked at her uncertainly, and then nodded.

"If you must," he said gruffly, and then turned away. Hurt was visible in the girl's face, but she swallowed it determinedly and followed after, leaving Sunry alone with a cellful of doubt.

The doubt held, a gloomy and perpetual cloud around him, until two days later, at approximately the moment when the head judge addressed Ashi for the first time. She had all the court's attention from the moment she first spoke.

"I will find Sunry innocent," she had replied. Her words burned with determination, but still, Sunry himself almost didn't believe it for a couple moments. Then he looked around to find everyone but her friends seeming equally stunned, including a couple of the judges. Luckily, they recovered quickly; Selkath were nothing if not impossibly unshakable.

"Very well," said one finally. "Acting as prosecutor on behalf of Ahto City is an impartial observer from the Sith Empire." With some difficulty, Ashi concealed a snort at 'impartial'. The judge took a deep breath, and then leapt into a speech that was either very well rehearsed, made up on the spot, or a new epidemic of word vomit. Even the Jedi in the room, fluent in their dozens of languages, were having trouble following it.

Despite himself, Jolee looked nervous. "She better have a good case," he murmured.

"Why?" Carth asked quietly, glancing over. He had opted to come; apparently, he felt obliged to represent the Republic with his presence. "Won't he be innocent unless they prove he's guilty?"

Jolee glanced over skeptically. "He's guilty until proven innocent, actually," he deadpanned. "That's the way this works."

"If you had been paying attention, you would know that," Ashi interjected out of the corner of her mouth, from where she sat in front of them.

"But it's stupid!"

"Oh, yeah, Carth, insulting their legal system's definitely going to swing it in our favor."

Carth opened and then closed his mouth, caught off guard by her scathing reply. Ever since the possession, Ashi had been frosty at best to him. Reluctantly, he admitted she might have had good reason, but it was still harsh.

He chose to ignore the hypocrisy in that thought.

The Sith was the first to speak, and he did so with conviction, as well as with a drawled accent that grated on her ears within seconds. Ashi was almost wondering why in space she was doing this when the judge announced, "It is now the defense's turn to cross-examine the witness."

She got quickly to her feet, her face masklike. Whatever she was thinking, none of it showed. The witness was Firith, and he broke into a visible smile as he saw Ashi. It seemed he found her the least intimidating. A bad miscalculation, but still.

He was happy to describe his encounter with Elassa, in all her dark Jedi glory. The Sith was full of objections by this point, but luckily, everyone—including the judges—was growing as sick of him as Ashi, and his protests came to nothing.

The second witness was Gluupor. His confession was helpful, if difficult to understand for all the stuttering. He was visibly pale and trembling as he slumped away from the witness stand, shuffling back down the hall as if the gallows awaited him at the end.

/Gluupor's going to die/ he mumbled as he passed Ashi.

"No you're not, Gluupor," she answered evenly. She was in a good enough mood; the trial was going well. Jolee had, in the end, accepted her decision: though he couldn't empathize, he understood her reasoning. She suspected he had agreed more for her own sake than for that of Sunry.

_And speaking of Sunry…_ Ashi sat up straighter, almost nervous. It was his turn to speak.

* * *

"That was great!"

Sunry was exuberant as they left the courtroom, positively skipping alongside them. Carth, Jolee, and Ashi, the latter two stony-faced, were walking with him to the Republic base. "You were fantastic, by the way," he added cheerfully to Ashi. "And Jolee! It really is just like old times, you swooping in to save me just in time. Thank space you came along, or I might not have gotten away with—"

Ashi, it seemed, had a sooner breaking point than Jolee, and it had been reached. With no warning at all, she spun to face him, and when he didn't stop talking, she cut in over him, the coldness in her voice second only to that in her face.

"Listen," she hissed, taking a couple steps towards him until she was hardly a foot away. "I didn't save you because I like you, okay? Get it fracking _straight_. I didn't do it for your sake, and I sure as hell don't think you did the right thing."

Sunry gaped, his mouth hanging open. He would be in danger of swallowing a bug or two in a moment. "What…?"

"_You_," she continued fiercely, cutting him off, "are a murdering _bastard_. And I am handing you over to the Republic, and they owe me, so they're going make sure you never do anything like that ever again. I'm talking everything but the _leash_."

"You're making me their prisoner?" he demanded furiously. "What the hell gives you the right to—"

Ashi raised her eyebrows. "Besides that I just saved your life? Oh _yeah_, _that_," she added sarcastically, as realization dawned visibly on him. "I saved your fracking skin, didn't I? Don't mess it up this time."

"But why did you save me, then?" he challenged angrily, throwing his hands up. In the shelter of a building, they were just hidden from cameras, but the shouting was still bound to attract trouble. Jolee was about to try and intervene, when, to his surprise, he found there was no need.

As if the words Sunry had said were magic, Ashi went quiet immediately. Her determined face turned pensive, almost uncertain. "Because," she said slowly, "everyone deserves a second chance."

Sunry lowered his hands, his thick white eyebrows furrowing together like caterpillars. "You talk about chances a lot," he observed. "This isn't just about me, is it?"

With a flood of surprise, Ashi realized why Jolee, the pensive old grouch, and this cheating ex-hero could be friends. When they got together before, you must have hardly been able to breathe for all the insights in the air. She met his scrutinizing gaze, tilting her head to the side in surprise. "You're right," she said finally. "I'm being selfish. I've done a lot more than you, but I want another chance too."

She waited for him to be surprised or offended, but it never happened. Instead, his eyebrows smoothed out in understanding. "You're not surprised?" she wondered aloud.

He snorted. "Why? You're doing it for yourself. Makes sense to me."

"You aren't offended." A statement this time, not a question.

"It's human," he shrugged, "to watch out for yourself." He stopped, and she felt his eyes searching her face, scrutinizing it carefully. "You're rather young to have done as much as you say," he commented.

Despite herself, she felt a wry smile curl her lips. "You can stop trying to figure out who I am. You've never seen my face."

Carth flinched inwardly at the comment, reminded with a jolt who it was who was standing in front of him. It was becoming so easy to forget why he was angry with her, or even if he was angry at all. For a moment Sunry visibly tried to decipher the answer, but then gave up.

"So you're having the Republic imprison me?"

"I'm having them watch you," she corrected. "You could be grateful."

"Better than dying, I suppose," he agreed lightly.

"Most things are better than that," Ashi replied. She was acutely aware of Carth watching her. He was staring, and it was slightly unnerving; more often than not since the Leviathan he'd been trying not to look at her at all.

Sunry nodded slowly. There was a pause, and then they turned the corner, and found themselves facing the bright orange banners of he Republic office. Ashi and Sunry both walked in without a pause. It was then, only when she was gone from sight, that Carth rounded on Jolee.

"What does she mean?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," replied the old man briskly, turning away.

"You understand her!" Carth exclaimed. "You must know—"

Jolee's face was suddenly, unexpectedly vicious as he spun back to face the soldier, his gaze stabbing Carth like dual knives. "I don't _understand_ her," he said coldly, and the soldier would have sworn the surrounding temperature fell a few degrees. "No one can _possibly_ understand what she's going through right now."

He took a couple steps back, staggered by the intensity of the old man's tone. "All right," he conceded after a pause, "but what does she mean? Being selfish?"

Jolee's face hardened, and he sighed through gritted teeth. It took Carth a moment to realize he wasn't the cause of aggravation any more. "I don't think she's right," he said finally. "She's looking for ways to save herself. She thinks she can... earn a second chance, I think."

"Earn one?" Carth echoed blankly. "She's…"

He nodded. "She's trying to be a saint, alongside everything else. Considering how she's just found out her entire life is a _lie_," he added wryly, "I suppose it could be a lot worse."

Carth shook his head. "You don't… no, I mean… and she thinks that's _selfish_?"

Jolee took a deep breath and let it out slowly. All at once, he looked very tired. "She thinks it's selfish to want another chance after what she's done," he explained carefully. "That's why she helped Sunry. She thinks that if she saves enough people, she can save herself."

He shook his head in frustration, running a hand through what little hair he had. Carth was getting the feeling he was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, and had become the unwitting audience for a rant from the old man. "She's only trapping herself," Jolee added, shaking his head. "It won't work. She'll never have achieved enough in her own eyes to make up for what she's done."

"That's…" Carth scrambled for words, reaching desperately for a reply to what he'd just heard. "That's insane," he finally decided. "She doesn't need to be _saved_... I mean, why can't she just—"

"Forgive herself?" Jolee chuckled humorlessly, a wormwood smile creeping over his face. "There'll always be people who hate her. She won't forgive herself while they don't forgive her." There was wry amusement in his voice, infuriated and yet somehow ironic.

Carth shook his head. "She doesn't need their _approval_."

Jolee's eyes, still fixed on him, narrowed sharply, and Carth shrunk under his gaze. It was a terrifying, penetrating look that, applied correctly, could have made the old man an excellent Jedi. For a moment his brow furrowed, almost as if he were searching for something in the face, but then he looked away. "That's interesting," he mused darkly, as he turned away, and Carth almost didn't hear him add, "She's doing a very good job of pretending she doesn't need yours."

_Almost._ Carth's breath lodged in his throat, and for a moment he was frozen, but then he grabbed the old man's shoulder, stopping him. Jolee turned back calmly to face him, and was half-surprised at the anger on the other man's face.

"What do you mean, she needs my approval?" he demanded, and Jolee sighed.

"She needs your forgiveness," he said slowly, as if explaining something to a stubborn child. "She's hurt you the most. If you can't forgive her, she can't forgive herself either."

_No._

For a moment, his mind stopped completely, denial gumming his thoughts. _He_ was the wrench in the works, the reason Ashi, most times, looking visibly patched together. It almost felt—no, screw almost. It _did_ feel _unfair_. Why couldn't he hate her—why did it have to come with consequences like this?

But the facts, laid out so simply by Jolee, still stood. She didn't forgive herself, because _he_ wouldn't forgive her.

But she was _Revan_—wasn't she?

_Wasn't she?_ What kind of fracked-up question was that? Of course she was!

But… _Revan_, Revan?

Well… it wasn't… he needed someone to blame!

_But it doesn't have to be _her_…_

He was still frozen, staring at Jolee, when Ashi came walking out of the base, looking distinctly pleased with herself. The expression faded, smile rolling off her lips like melting wax, when she saw Jolee and Carth, staring at each other so fiercely that the air practically crackled with electricity. Both spun to look at her—so fast they might have gotten whiplash, Carth looking like he'd seen a ghost—and then averted their eyes immediately. Carth was first to turn and stride away, Jolee following suit a moment later.

"What'd I miss?" she asked finally, hurrying to catch up, but neither man would answer.

* * *

**R&r for a quote and a little foreshadowing, as always. Unfortunately, I promised myself in advance that I won't beg (_stupid dignity..._) but a little reminder that you're all still reading is never amiss ;)**


	26. Risk

**Huge thanks to everyone who reviewed! It makes my day, and it's awesome to know you're all still with me ;) I've said it before, but they really are a better pickup than caffeine--and this is coming from someone who can't remember the last time she went more than a week without something Diet Coke/Starbucks-y.  
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**But anyway. This is the Manaan sea floor, pt. I (pt. II coming later-ish... i.e. eventually). And it's called 'Risk', so you know it must be intense... lol. Enjoy XP  
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**Disclaimer: don't own KotOR**

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* * *

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**Risk: to take a chance; to put oneself in danger**

Ashi had done her best to act surprised when Wann explained about the base at the bottom of the sea. She didn't need to feign nervousness, though—all of that was genuine. Any sleep she got later that night was broken and restless, sprinkled generously with visions of choking and dark, frigid water. It also didn't help much when Mission felt the need to hug her goodbye before they trooped out of the Ebon Hawk in the morning. Hugs, as Ashi saw them, were only for people who might not come back.

Dustil got a hug too, which made him blush furiously, but the girl deliberately skipped Carth and HK, the rest of the sub's crew. Ashi didn't blame her. She wouldn't even have chosen to bring Carth, but for the fact that the soldier—damn him—was the only one who could actually captain a submarine.

Well, in _theory_, anyway. Which was so reassuring as they dropped into the ocean and began to sink. The good foot of durasteel and plexiglass encasing them didn't stop the pressure building in Ashi's ears as they descended, and certainly didn't help to dispel her image of the sub suddenly crumpling like a tin can.

It started out blue, but faded in imperceptible layers, darkness weaseling its way in until suddenly it was omnipresent, and she couldn't remember when it had begun. Light filtered quickly away, until they could see nothing but the cold, pitch-black water caught in the headlamps. The lights sawed away patches of shadow, but still mostly just served to display how much blackness there still was. Shapes began to brush past the glass separating her from the ocean, and she suppressed a shudder as one came close enough for her to catch a momentary flash of teeth. She closed her eyes, feeling something akin to ice sliding down her spine and settling gracelessly in her stomach. Worst Star Map ever—no competition.

But finally Carth's voice, habitually formal, crackled over the link. "Approaching the Republic station, Ashi," he announced.

For a moment, silence followed his words. Ashi was surprised; he had been trying to avoid calling her by a name for a while now. "Roger that," she replied, her words touched with sarcasm, and he responded by dipping the nose of the sub. They passed through an arch into a pool, through whose surface Ashi saw the wonderful glimmer of florescent light. She was the first to unlatch her door, and was out of the submarine instants after it broke the water's surface.

Unfortunately, the inside of the base wasn't much better than the sub had been. Water dripped from walls and ceilings with a constant, rhythmic _splat_, and the dark puddles, already beginning to harbor life, told Ashi that leaking wasn't anything new. Her every footstep echoed on the rusting metal as she took a couple steps around, examining the room. It was ugly, boxy, rusty, the only color a couple of dilapidated orange banners tacked to the walls. All in all, it looked abandoned, and she felt inexplicably invasive, in a place that belonged far more to the ocean than to her.

While the rest of them got out of the sub and stretched, looking infuriatingly calm, she glared viciously at the dripping walls and tried not to think of all the other water beyond them. Finally, Carth disembarked, hefting his blaster, and she could turn to head for the first door.

It groaned open as she punched in an override code, and an instant later a blaster shot ricocheted off the wall, missing her head by an inch. Ashi staggered, head snapping to follow the shot's path, before turning back to face a stunned-looking Twi'lek.

He threw down his blaster immediately with a clatter, face pale. /Space, I'm sorry/ he said frantically. /I thought you were more of them… I thought they were coming…/

Ashi raised an eyebrow as she picked up the blaster, passing it automatically to Carth. "Them?"

His voice lowered to a conspiratorial whisper. /The Selkath. They've gone crazy or something and started attacking everyone… hell/ he added shakily, /I think they ate Jared…/

"Crazy Selkath." She didn't bother to hide her skepticism.

/Yes! They must've been here for a while. They're attacking anyone who they see. I was the only one who survived/ he insisted, eyes wide and alight with fear.

Ashi was briefly trying to remember if she knew any schizophrenics and, if so, if this was what they acted like. After a moment, she gave up, and simply made to brush past the Twi'lek. "Right. Well," she announced, moving towards the next door, "if you'll excuse us, we have to get by; we've kind of got bigger things to worry about."

/No!/ he shrieked, throwing himself in her way. /No, you can't go through there! They'll eat us all!/

"It's a risk I'll have to take."

/Fine/ he snapped. /But if you get back, you have to help me./ For a moment, he even succeeded in sounding firm, but the next moment he looked solely pathetic as he added, /You'll take me back to Ahto City, won't you? I'll die down here if you leave me!/

Unexpectedly, HK piped up. "Suggestion: perhaps we could dismantle the meatbag, master, to make him easier to transport."

The Twi'lek paled to a sickly shade of olive. /What? You can't _dismantle_ me!" he protested. /I'll die!/

The droid's red eyes flashed brighter for a moment. "Amendment: I did forget that," he said, although something about his tone made Ashi think he'd _forgotten_ on purpose. "Stupid, frail organic meatbags!"

"Wait here," Ashi interrupted, to the horrified Twi'lek. "We'll be back in a few hours."

/If you get back/ she heard him mutter behind her, and purposefully ignored it.

But the pessimistic Twi'lek had been right on at least one count. Selkath had overrun the base, and although Ashi did try to talk to the first few dozen, it had become clear very quickly that they were in no mood for conversation. Many of them had sonic guns or shock sticks, and the ones who didn't attacked anyway, clawing at them with their flippers. Ashi noticed with some disgust that many of their empty hands were covered in blood—and not their own. It seemed most of the victims that the Twi'lek had mentioned hadn't put up much of a fight.

However, once the shock began to wear off, it was relatively smooth going. Despite running into a strange-sounding character in a locker muttering about 'fish sticks' and drove after drove of mad-eyed, bloodthirsty Selkath, it actually wasn't too bad. In fact, things were going so well that Ashi had even almost forgotten they were underwater.

So, naturally, disaster struck.

They were nearing the end of a fight with yet another group of Selkath, their group of four spread along the length of a long, damp hallway. Despite the heat battle usually provided for Ashi, a racing heartbeat forcing her environment into irrelevance, she was all too aware of how tired she was becoming, how cold and damp everything around her seemed to be seemed. The only semblance of warmth came flickering down from the florescent strips above their heads, a weak and sickly glow that washed the color from everything. Though windows lined one stretch of wall, they provided no light; if anything, in fact, they made the atmosphere worse. The only things to be seen from them were utter darkness, punctuated by the occasional flick of a tail, or glint of teeth.

Thanks to the Selkath, however, there was no time to pay attention to those. Ashi had just saved herself from nearly being gutted by stabbing the would-be killer first between the ribs, when the last Selkath managed to get his sonic blaster out.

A wave of energy threw her off balance, sending her ears ringing. She stumbled dizzily, lurching sideways as the world tilted, and he reared up…

Blaster fire echoed through the hall, rapid and harsh to her recovering ears. The Selkath collapsed to the ground, oily blood immediately growing in a puddle around him, but Ashi paid it no attention. Her gaze was riveted to a window several meters away, a sudden rush of adrenaline sharpening her vision very, very quickly. The overenthusiastic blaster fire had ricocheted, marking a small, white line in the glass.

With a tiny splintering noise that all four of them heard, the line grew a couple inches. Ashi held her breath, and then, all hell broke loose.

She had a split second as the cracks spread out like a giant, terrible spiderweb, and used it the first way that came to mind. "Run!" she shouted, spinning and racing away.

The other three took the advice without hesitation, and not a moment too soon. The window shattered, the sound swallowed by the roar of water exploding into the base. An alarm began shrieking from somewhere above, announcing, "_Security doors closing; repeat, security doors_—" but cut off sharply as the ocean engulfed it. Like bones bending and snapping, the walls and ceilings behind them gave way under the pressure in a terrible crunch of metal. More of the windows burst behind her, shards of glass flying inches ahead of fresh waves of water. She turned halfway and threw out a hand, trying to create a shield; but it flickered helplessly and died, and rightly so. How could anyone hold back the ocean?

And then, the next instant, a wave jerked her feet out from under her, blowing her away. Stupidly, reflexively, she breathed in and choked. Ice water flooded though her almost as quickly as the regret, burning her lungs—ironically—like fire. She wasn't even sure which way was up or down any more, only conscious of the intense pain in her chest and the absolute lack of air and all this _water_—

But suddenly something grabbed her collar, yanking her backwards and sideways. She stumbled and fell, hard. It took her a moment to realize that for a painful fall, there must be something solid under her, and enough air for gravity.

She sat in a couple feet of cold water, staring at a bulging door. As she watched, it creaked, and she saw a couple drops of water begin to leak through. Horror flooded through her, but the next moment a hand was tugging her up and away from the door and its leak. Dwindling amounts of water splashed and dragged at her feet as she half-ran and was half dragged through the next couple rooms, hearing the sharp slam of doors behind her.

And then he stopped, apparently satisfied they were safe. Abruptly, he let go of her. No longer able to stand, Ashi slumped back against the wall and slid to the floor. She was physically shaking, adrenaline racing in her veins, and her breath was coming in embarrassingly loud gasps. She leaned over, retching at the lingering taste of salt in her mouth.

"Are you all right?"

Ashi paused, mid-gag, in time to realize exactly who her savior was. Her eyes narrowed as she looked back up at Carth, coughing painfully as she did. "I'd be better if I wasn't half-drowned," she snapped, doing her best to look pitiful. It took little effort. A very small part of her was impressed at how well he'd handled the whole near-death situation. The rest of her—a definite majority—still remembered who'd shot the window.

"You're fine," he said flatly, taking her ability to form as a retort as a sign of good health. "What about the other two?"

"I'll see," she replied tersely. With more composure than she actually felt, she closed and reopened her eyes, focusing like she had in the Sith base. Again, the already washed-out world took on a pallor of gray. Down here, where life was scarce, less gold crisscrossed the air, but that made Carth, standing nearby, look all the brighter. His emotions exploded out at her like a blow, almost knocking the breath out of her for a moment. He radiated a deep shining blue, although it tossed and turned like… well, like the ocean, if less terrifying. Despite the goodness, though, something was upsetting him. Out of curiosity, she focused harder, and found little sparks of gold and orange, flickering in it like sparks.

The sparks: confusion, and worry. She remembered what she was supposed to be for and moved her gaze, searching hazily through the walls for life…

There! A clump of blue, wavering but definitely alive, was shining some distance away. Next to it was a gleam of red that could only be HK. They'd been further up the hall, with far more time to run than her, but Ashi still felt a slight comfort in knowing that they were all right. Carefully, she reached out and gave Dustil a nudge through the Force.

She felt him jump, and then relax as he recognized her. _Ash! _he exclaimed, a light pulse of green—presumably relief—running through him. _Are you guys okay?_

_Well, we're soaked and already arguing, but other than that, yeah. You?_

She felt him slump back with a sigh of relief. His thoughts, a background whisper layering behind his words, ran something like, _thank space thank space thank the Force thank space_, but to her he replied, _I'm fine, and so is your homicidal droid. He was worried about you, I think. He called me an inferior meatbag._

Ashi snorted, prompting a puzzled look from Carth. _You'll live. Can you reach us?_

_I don't know,_ he replied._ There's a door out of here; I can try to work my way to you._

_You do that_, she nodded. _Hurry, okay? There's only so much air._

She felt his affirmation right before she blinked hard, returning her vision to normal. Carth was watching her closely, and she heaved an irritable sigh, breaking the silence apart like kicking through half-formed ice.

"They're fine," she said. "They're going to find us." Having gotten the essentials out, she slouched against the wall, crossing her arms over her chest. Salt water was already forming a cold puddle around her, crusting like drying tears on her every inch of bare skin.

Carth took a seat on a crate across from her. There was a long silence.

"Well," he said finally, "now we know why they use sonic weapons."

Ashi didn't respond. There was another pause.

"Are you angry?"

"Yes."

"_Why?_"

"You nearly _drowned _me."

"I also saved you," he added sharply. "You could be grateful."

"If you hadn't almost _drowned_ me, I wouldn't have needed saving!"

It was a good point, and shut him up for all of three seconds, before he asked, "Can you swim?"

Ashi ignored him, coughing weakly into her arm. Her throat felt like she'd just swallowed gasoline and matches in quick succession, and everything tasted disgustingly salty. She'd hoped that guilt, if nothing else would keep him silent, but to no avail. "I said, can you—"

"No," she interrupted angrily. "No, okay? The almighty Revan can't swim. In fact, I _hate _water. Always have; always will."

To his surprise, it came off as more of a confession than an outburst. As she spoke, she subsided into a self-conscious murmur. "But, the Map…" he began.

"Malak got it," she explained quietly. "I know where it is and all; he showed me through the Force, but I stayed here. He thought it was hilarious," she added, with a slight and absentminded roll of her eyes. "I faced down Mandalore, but I was scared of a little water."

Her eyes were downcast; she spoke shyly and with hesitation, and for the briefest flash of time, Carth could picture it. He saw her, years younger, down here with the Malak that he'd met during wartime. It was a strange image: a dark-robed Ashi and this hated figure, laughing and joking as only best friends could. Everyone knew Revan and Malak, at least during the Mandalorian Wars, were friends to the death, but he had never considered it in great detail, or with Ashi as the Sith Lord's best friend.

Although had they only been friends? All through the war, rumors had flown, but no one had ever really known for sure. Besides, he'd kept the company of people who loved a good innuendo; hell, he'd been one of those people himself for a while. The thing was, with Revan and Malak, everyone had had an opinion, but no one had ever really known.

He wasn't even sure if he wanted to know now, but the question would not be denied. Half afraid to hear the answer—no, damn it, _more_ than half—he opened his mouth to ask, but was saved by a side door grating open from the other side of the room. Ashi jumped, straightening and then bracing herself on the wall as she scrambled to her feet.

Dustil burst through the doorway, followed closely by HK. Ashi gave him a weak smile, still not quite recovered from her near death, and Carth nodded tersely. However, to both their surprise, a wide grin was plastered on the boy's face.

"Look what we found," he said eagerly. "I think this must be a lab or something; there's a ton of stuff, including…" He broke off, turning to gesture, and then continued, "_this_."

Ashi stared, taking a couple hesitant steps into the room. In front of them was a giant, rubbery _something_ that was remotely human-shaped, and possibly the most offensive neon yellow she had ever seen. Despite all this, however, the suit had one redeeming factor, and that was the fact that it looked fully functional, down to the oxygen tank that blinked at about 75% full.

"A dive suit?" Carth observed finally.

"_Really_?" Ashi muttered sarcastically, approaching it. It was approximately her size, she thought, eyeing it suspiciously, although it was hard to tell.

"It's only three quarters full," he continued. "That's not enough."

"How _else_ are we going to get the Star Map?" Dustil challenged, immediately defensive of his discovery. "Sea floor, right? This suit's our best bet."

"Yeah," Ashi agreed. "Kid's right, Carth." Despite her nonchalance, however, she was unable to keep a tremor of hesitation from her voice as she added, "So I guess I'll see if it fits, yeah?"

It took a moment for her words to sink in, but when they did, Carth found himself frozen. Until that moment, he realized, he hadn't quite understood how far Jolee had meant by 'any lengths'. All right: so she'd saved a war hero, and enlightened a bunch of misguided Selkath teens; there was nothing _wrong_ with that. But forcing herself on a mission she was terrified of—and he knew she was forcing herself; he'd heard her voice shaking clearly enough—was… it wasn't even…

Well, the point was that there was a line. If she wouldn't draw it herself, then someone had to draw it for her.

Ashi reached for the suit, and his grip tightened around her other wrist like a handcuff, biting about as tightly. "No," Carth declared furiously, tugging her back to face the rest of them. "You just said you're scared of water! You can't—you _shouldn't _go!"

She tore her hand from his grip, rubbing her wrist irritably. "I _can_ and I _will_," she snapped. "It's my size, I need less air than you, and, oh yeah: _I'm _the only one who knows where the Map is, genius."

"We could figure it out," he insisted. "Look, I just… you're not a good person to go, especially because of what you just said—"

It came out wrong, and he knew it the moment she bristled. Like it or not, he was aware of her every change in attitude, able to read her moods almost before they came—not that that usually helped him avoid making her angry.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she replied, voice oozing sarcasm like molten lava. "I forgot that it doesn't matter if I'm the best choice. I can't go because I'm _Revan_, right?" An obvious flash of pain lit in her eyes at the name, but she scowled through it, almost succeeding in hiding it.

"It's not mistrust!" snapped Carth, meaning it, but her expression showed that she didn't believe him. "You can't just go out there on your own. What if you get hurt or something? What'll we do then?"

He'd meant it sincerely, but Ashi's eyes narrowed before he'd even finished. "Oh, that's sweet," she said venomously. "Didn't think you cared. Unless this is less about me, and more about how you'd manage without the environment suit?"

A step too far. Carth opened his mouth in outrage, but Dustil cut in.

"Shut up!" he exclaimed. They both froze, and for a moment looked almost—_almost—_sheepish. "Ashi… my dad does have a point." His voice was reluctant, and it sounded like saying that had taken effort—family ties or not, he usually took her side on just about everything. "How're we supposed to help you if you get mauled by one of the firaxa?"

He raised his eyebrows expectantly, and she shrugged. "How about I just don't? That would work."

"But…" Carth began again. Ashi glared at him.

"Look, we don't have any time for this!" she exploded. "The base is leaking because _someone_ shot the window"—the accusation was spoken directly to Carth, telling him she knew exactly who '_someone_' was—"and there's only so much air! We need to talk to the giant fish, and I'm the only one of us who can use the Force for that." Here, Dustil made to interrupt, and she amended, "_And_ whose dad'll let them go, Dustil."

Carth looked over at Dustil, visibly shocked; though the boy made to protest, the soldier shook his head so vehemently that he was silenced.

"Look…" Ashi paused, and then sighed, shaking her head wearily. "You're going to be really pissed at me for this," she muttered. "So I won't tell you it's for your own good."

And before any of them could demand an explanation, she flicked her fingers like she was throwing a net. All three of them froze, outlined in a thin violet film, with and matching expressions of horror on their faces.

Ashi grimaced, an expression that told them they'd really brought this on themselves, and then turned and began to pull on the lurid yellow environment suit. Without looking back at them, she announced, "I do have a communicator. But if you call it to yell at me, I'll throw it in the sea for the sharks," she told them seriously, before tugging on the helmet. Impervious—she hoped—she stepped through the door to the flooded hall. It slammed closed behind her with a clang like a funeral bell, and then the stasis fields released.

"Frack," spat Dustil, before either of the others could manage a word. Carth inwardly agreed, but it was all he could do to stand there: still frozen; stunned and horrified. Freezing them to run off was about as low a trick as a Force user could pull, and he wanted to be angry… but at the same time, he simply couldn't muster fury. It was like that part of him was a volcano, and while it had been furiously active for the last couple weeks, it was suddenly and startlingly extinct. Ashi wasn't doing this to hurt them. She was doing it so she could be the one to take the risk, and they could be safe. No matter how stupid of her it was, it was selfless stupidity.

_Fine_, another part of him interrupted, _but selfless stupidity that could prove fatal._ There were far too many ways this could go wrong, too many potential outcomes where she didn't come back. All he could do was slump against the wall, brush off Dustil's look of sympathy and total understanding—when had that boy gotten so _wise?_—and pray to the Force that she would. He needed her to; they all did.

Of course, that wasn't going to stop any of them from being mad as hell, if and when she returned.

* * *

Ashi tried edging the door to the flooded hall open, but it didn't help at all. Water gushed through the gap the instant it opened, and she couldn't help an utter certainty she would drown as it rose to swallow her whole. In a moment of pure, helpless instinct, she closed her eyes: she didn't want to see herself go under.

When she opened them, it was dark, the lights above her head turned blurry and fractured by the water. She let the door slide open, closing it carefully behind her as she made her way through. No point in dong this for her friends if a leak drowned them first. Once satisfied, she began to head towards the exit, footsteps heavy and lumbering. The hiss of her breath was loud and frightening in her ears, the only noise that existed.

She was about halfway through the ruins of the hall when she stumbled over something and, despite herself, she looked down. The _something_ was a pale, washed-out Selkath corpse, a dark hole on his temple marking Carth's perfect aim. He drifted aimlessly from the collision with her foot, bobbing a couple inches away. A sonic rifle was drifting near his hand, and after a moment of deliberation, she reached for it. After all, she would need it soon.

Very soon. _Oh, space. _Everything sunk in, in an instant. She couldn't do this—not _didn't want to_, not _wasn't sure_, but _couldn't_. This wasn't nerves or anxiety, wasn't even panic. She knew all of those. This was terror, something pure and primal and animalistic that was expanding inside her like a black hole. She felt hollow, unsteady; her hands were shaking within the suit's thick yellow fingers, and her breath speeding in her ears.

_I can't do this_, protested a voice from the back of her mind. _I can't I can't I can't it's dark I'm scared_—

She shoved the thought fiercely away as if it were no more there than a cobweb brushing over her vision. _No,_ she reminded herself, _you have to go. You need to earn this. Besides, who else is going to go if you don't? Carth? _Dustil?

And because it was true, unthinkably so, she bent over and took the rifle in her clumsy, gloved hands. Water pulled at her with clinging hands as she started to lumber down the wrecked hall. Eventually the walls were too mangled to pick her way through, and so she carefully instead made her way out of one of the frames where the window had been. Following the decimated edge of the building led her to the previous airlock and exit, where a path wound through the dark, slimy aquatic plants, beaten by thousands of heavy footsteps like hers.

Swallowing her reluctance, she took one step. Another. This wasn't so bad.

Something moved in the shadows, just out of sight. Ashi jumped and spun, but it was gone as quickly as it had come, lost between the plants. She shivered in the suit, feeling horribly obvious. Why didn't she just carry a fracking sign saying _eat me_?

But now something else was rising from the murkiness further along the path: a smaller building huddled among the kolto, with an entrance forking off to the side. Not bothering to conceal her relief, she hurried for it as well as she could. Finned shapes were still moving past her every so often, raising eddies in the kolto, but all they could do was spur her to move faster. Claustrophobia was pressing down on her, tightening against her ribs. She had to get out of the water—she couldn't, simply _couldn't_, be this vulnerable for another moment more.

The door stuck at first touch, but she yanked on it with mounting desperation, and it finally gave, groaning open. Ashi scrambled through the entrance, dragging the heavy hatch to slam shut behind her. For a moment, she was conscious of only the water and the darkness, but then she heard the gurgle of draining water, muffled slightly by the helmet. Strips of light flickered on above her after a moment to reveal a couple fast-draining feet of water left. Ashi didn't realize she'd been holding her breath until she let it out.

She slipped eagerly out of the bulky suit, abandoning it there. The next room was full of Selkath, but they were in bad shape, all albino-pale skin and bloody gashes, and were easily dispatched. A ghost-town silence filled the room as the last one crumpled to the floor, and Ashi suppressed a shiver. Letting a jolt of the Force flicker over her skin, smoothing over a couple wounds, she made her way through the door to a dull gray hallway, following a light she could make out at the end.

She wasn't sure what she'd expected. An abandoned laboratory, maybe, the consoles smeared with drying blood… that was, if she was lucky, and the Selkath hadn't left scraps. However, eyes fixed on the room as she paced down the hall, she caught sight of motion, and her footsteps sped as she hurried to the door.

There were two people in the room, both of them whirling to stare as they heard her echoing footsteps. They stood at the other end of a long room, huddled against the wall—but, Ashi realized as she paced closer, they were both slightly blurry. Her instant thought was a lack of oxygen, but as tore her focus from the people, it clicked: a near-invisible shield cut across the room, dividing her from the two of them.

She was about to speak when the door slammed behind her. The sound was distinctly ominous, and she spun to face it. It occurred to her to wonder, as all the walls around her were perfectly flat, where the air was coming from.

"Stay there!"

One figure had spoken: a woman by her voice, although with her close-cropped hair and lab coat, it was difficult to tell otherwise. "Don't come any closer!" she repeated, a note of hysteria in her words. "You can't come in! You'll let the Selkath in, and the—_no_! Stay _away!_"

The last outburst was prompted by Ashi, with a calculated indifference, taking a careful step closer. The man spoke next—the woman was too busy flinching away in terror. "We'll kill you!" he snarled, pointing an accusing finger at her as if to fix her in place. "You think we won't? You're not letting them all in! I'll…" He paused a moment, scrabbling for a threat, but then his face broke into a tight-drawn smile. It didn't touch his eyes, which were wide and gleaming—the face of a madman. "I'll suck the pressure out of the chamber! That'll stop you!"

He turned and raced to a console near him, spindly fingers flying over the keys with the practice of an expert. Ashi abandoned diplomacy, racing to the force field. "No!" she shouted, banging against it—liquid ripples spread over the surface, but it was as unyielding as stone. "Please, I'm a frien—"

She choked. There was suddenly no air in the air around her. She couldn't help it: her hands flew to her throat, as if that would suddenly let her breathe. Head spinning, she half staggered against the force field, feet finding little traction on the damp ground. Her hands hammered against it, despite the pain knifing through them with every contact. "_Please_," she mouthed, unable to manage anything louder.

The woman's eyes widened, and for a split second, the fear vanished, leaving lucidity in its place. "Kono!" she cried. "Kono, no, let her in!"

He was shaking his head viciously, standing in front of the keyboard, but she shoved him aside. It wasn't a hard push; he seemed to stumble more out of surprise than anything else. The woman slammed her hand onto a button on the console, and the force field dissolved into thin air.

Ashi slumped to the ground, gasping, as Kono raced to the keyboard, pushing the woman aside. "_Don't…_" Ashi managed, through rapid, relieved breaths.

He turned to stare, seeming surprised she was intelligent enough to talk. "What?"

"No," she repeated, panting. "Calm down. I'll help you."

"You… what?"

Now he looked absolutely stunned. Ashi got slowly to her feet, rubbing her neck with as little subtlety as she could manage. She was pleased to see him look remorseful, and he mumbled after a moment, "I'm sorry. I just… I panicked when I heard you outside. I was so scared… forgive me."

And the madness had, indeed, gone from his eyes. He was just a man, a little older than her and very much worse at hiding his fear. He stared at the damp gray floor in shame, and she smiled reassuringly. "It's okay," she said. "You're scared. But... do you think you can tell me what's going on here?"

He brightened at this—after all, he was a scientist; it was his job to have the explanation—but when he spoke, his tone was dark. "I don't know, exactly," he murmured. "I... well, let me introduce myself. My name is Kono, and I'm the Republic's planetary Head of Subaquatic Research and Development." Somehow, despite everything, his voice was still touched with pride as he stated his title. "I've been down here for almost two years, heading this project. It was me and Sammy, mostly," he continued, gesturing to the woman, "but the rest of our team"—at _team_, Sammy gave a muffled sob—"were also down here working when we heard this... this horrible noise—"

"A scream," broke in Sammy, glancing up.

"That's right, a sort of scream. Anyway, the next thing we knew, our Selkath researchers suddenly went crazy. They started screaming too, and clawing at everything around them. My team was… was torn apart, and eaten before my eyes."

Ashi swallowed a wave of nausea at the imagery. Next to Kono, Sammy added, "We thought we were the only ones. It was terrible: we'd hear the Selkath banging around, and all these strange noises in the walls, and… well. We were sure everyone else was dead."

But Ashi was only interested in one thing. "As you can see, that's not quite true," she shrugged. "And if we're going to keep it from being true, I'm going to need your help." Sammy said nothing, staring blankly at her, but Kono gave a nod, prompting her to continue. "I," Ashi explained, "need to go out into the rift."

"NO!"

Ashi stared at Sammy, who had seemed so soft-spoken a moment before. "You can't!" the scientist protested. "That's where our research team was when…"

"I'm not scared of firaxa," lied Ashi calmly.

"You should be," Kono declared, with an ominous glance out the window towards the waves of kolto. "This isn't an ordinary one Sammy's talking about. Right after the scream—we were looking out the window at the time, monitoring our harvesting team—we saw a massive creature swim out of the rift."

"It looked like a firaxa," Sammy murmured, "but it was massive: larger than anything I've ever seen, even the submersibles. It screamed, and that was when the Selkath all went… went…"

"_Whoa_, whoa, whoa," Ashi interrupted, holding up her hands to stop Sammy from providing details. What they seemed to be implying had, impossibly, just lessened her faith in the Republic even further. "Out there"—she gestured vaguely to the wall behind them, and the window—"is the galaxy's biggest mutant shark, and nobody _knew_ it was _there_?"

"No! I mean," amended Kono, slightly defensive, "we only found out about it when we moved closer to the rift."

Suddenly, Sammy's lips parted, and she glanced over at Kono eagerly. "In fact," she murmured, "it's certainly possibly that we might have... disturbed it."

That was all it took. Both their eyes lit with the thrill of discovery. "You're right!" Kono exclaimed, spinning to face her. "If our construction woke it—"

"Then it might have been afraid—"

"And when it screamed, all the smaller firaxa—"

"Must have swarmed to protect it. You don't think—"

"Space, you're right! They must be its children, protecting their mother. But—"

"It must be ancient, in that case, much…"

Ashi was half-following the conversation, and mainly busy being impressed at how capable they were at finishing each other's sentences. Finally, however, when they started to discuss evolution on a galactic scale, she felt the need to interrupt. "So... anything I can, maybe, _do_ about it?"

Kono jumped—it seemed they had forgotten she was there—but then frowned, tapping his chin with a long, thin finger. "Well, there is one thing," he mused. "Firaxa have always been a problem for us, but we've developed a soluble chemical compound that—"

"You can't use that!" interrupted Sammy, mouth dropping open. "Kono, we never got it right, remember?"

"It's ideal for this situation," he replied coldly. "We want the firaxa gone, don't we? Guaranteed success."

"But the ecosystem! We've only tested it in a controlled environment! You have no idea what it'll do to the kolto!"

That caught Ashi's attention. Force or no Force, kolto had saved lives, including her own several times over. "I'm not risking the kolto," she threw in.

It was the wrong thing to say. Though Sammy beamed, she launched a moment later into a long-winded, Jedi-worthy lecture on another _possible_ way to drive the shark off moments later. Kono, obviously disappointed, stalked over to the window, gazing out broodingly over the kolto waves. He looked, somehow, like he belonged down here, Ashi thought: the lab coat, stained with chemicals, the pale, sun-deprived complexion, the dark, liquid eyes. She wondered if that was what it did to you, living down here. Two years was a long time to spend underwater.

Meanwhile, Sammy's explanation continued as she cheerfully helped Ashi lug the environment suit to the rift exit. This new plan was something about blowing up harvesters and appeasing the massive shark, which sounded, if not totally foolproof, then reasonably interesting. Still mumbling about ecosystems, the scientist gave the suit a quick once-over, checking for any rips. As Ashi watched, however, she felt a tap on her shoulder, and turned to see Kono staring at her intently. His fingers, flesh strangely cold, closed on her wrist, and he pressed a vial of dark sepia liquid into her hand.

"You're good to humor Sammy," he murmured under his breath, "but if you change your mind, I guarantee you this will work."

Ashi said nothing. She had no plans to single-handedly wipe out the universe's only kolto supply, but took the vial anyway, slipping it into a pocket in the suit. There was no point in making an enemy of Kono.

She gave the two anxious-looking scientists a quick goodbye, promising for the third time to send a rescue team, and then the airlock door slammed behind her. Again, water gushed in, and again, she closed her eyes before she submerged. She didn't dare open them again until the doors were open.

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**As always, R&R. Any feedback's good--it's just great to know you're reading :) Oh, and (on a complete tangent) happy Valentine's Day, everyone!  
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	27. Strength

**Hi, guys!**

**Huge thanks for all the reviews, as always :) Good news--I happen to be exceptionally happy right now, seeing as my spring break starts on Saturday. Aaand, my overachieving goal (being 70% of the way through Lehon right now; yes, that does, in fact, include a slightly tweaked "I can't hate you") is to finish. As in, finish finish. As in, I'm beginning to wonder what I'll do with my time now... o_O**

**Oh, and Blindfury: I pronounce it "Ah-shee" (rhymes with... squashy? According to the rhyming dictionary, which I have officially lost all faith in), although it's really w/e you like better.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR.  
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Strength: courage; the power to rise

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Ashi's every nerve was alive with electricity as she stepped out into the open. A lamp on her head sawed away a patch of light directly in front of her, but only there, in just the right way that there was always darkness creeping into the edges of her vision. The path through the kolto was narrow and twisted sharply, cutting off her view. She would be essentially blind as she made her way to the giant shark.

Space, that was a terrifying sentence.

Goosebumps prickled her skin, and it wasn't until she took a shaky breath that she realized she was trembling. Going out once had been terrible. She wasn't sure she could completely stand it a second time. Hand tightening on the sonic blaster, she set off, plodding into the kolto.

Tall, dark plants swirled and danced around her in waves of shadow. Ashi had never known darkness like this: not the barest ray of sun glittered from above, the only light at all coming from the lamp attached to her helmet. Every flicker of motion sent her heart racing double-time, and she was acutely aware of how slow she was, how every breath used up a little more air. This place was like no place she had ever seen, but a nightmare world, where all the shadows she was afraid of flittered just out of sight.

_I don't want to do this._

It was amazing how sudden the thought was. It wasn't apologetic; it wasn't even hesitant. _I don't want to be here. This scares me._

Every word seems to echo in her mind. Ashi stopped, despite herself. Her eyes moved slowly, taking in the water, and then she murmured faintly, "I'm scared."

It was like opening a dam. Admittance rushed through her mind, bursting with relief to be set free. Ashi couldn't remember why she'd been so unwilling to say it, when it felt to good to admit. She was scared, and it was dark and cold, and she couldn't even tell if there was enough air or not making its way to her lungs. And why shouldn't something frighten her? No one was invulnerable, not even Revan.

Something flashed by her.

It was so quick that she only saw a shadow, and the dark edge of a fin, but it was enough. The kolto whirled dizzily, proof that something had been there a moment ago and that potentially that _something _was coming back. Ashi's fingers clutched the blaster so tightly she threatened to break it. She desperately wished for a wall behind her back; she was open to attack from any angle, and horribly vulnerable.

It darted by again; she saw it from the corner of her eye. Should she keep going? Refuse to acknowledge it? Or should she stay, confront it, take the risk? There was a hell of a lot more to be lost in risks, but more to be gained as well.

But worst-case scenarios always stemmed from confrontation. By stepping around an issue, you avoided any danger at all, right?

_And_ any peace. What peace could you have, with shadows always lurking in the corner of your eyes, dancing away, reminding you of what had been and what could be?

Her heart was pounding, but from anticipation rather than fear. Somehow, it wasn't about the firaxa any more, and she was hanging onto every word. Just like her footsteps, they took her a little bit closer to her answer. She was perfectly still, unwilling to move a muscle and lose this fragile train of thought before its arrival at an epiphany.

But the shark chose that moment to remind her of its presence. One moment she had frozen, an answer that she needed flittering just beyond her fingertips, and the next, a pair of jaws was flying at her. Ashi gasped in horror and stumbled back, raising the blaster and pulling the trigger in a split second.

The firaxa stiffened, a shudder passing along the length of its dark body. Its narrowed, golden eye glassed over, and it began to drift away. Ashi edged deliberately around it, unaware of how badly she was shaking. Inwardly, she searched for her thoughts, trying to salvage them. An answer, crucial beyond explanation, had been so close… How had it started?

She was scared…

_So what? No one cares._

This was a new voice, a darker, bitter one. Ashi shied away from it, sure that it hadn't been there before. Besides, that wasn't true. Mission, Dustil, Jolee, Canderous, Zaalbar—all of them cared. All of them were waiting for her. She had to come back; she'd promised them.

_A promise—oh, that means a lot. You're the destroyer of worlds, and you value a _promise_?_

To them? Yes, she did. If she couldn't keep a promise, she didn't deserve their trust at all.

_And if you gave up, it wouldn't matter anyway. None of it matters. Let it go. Then you won't have to worry about anything_.

Her feet were lead—no, heavier—and it was a struggle to force herself into one step and another. All she could see was kolto, and sand, and too much darkness._ It would be easy to lose herself here_, whispered a thought in the back of her mind, its voice made of dead leaves and acrimony, _easy to disappear and simply never come back_.

And who'll kill Malak? If I die?

_Why does it matter? You won't have to—space knows you don't want to._

That was true—she didn't. In fact, the thought terrified her. How was she supposed to fight him again, to knowingly try to kill him, if she'd failed so miserably before?

He'd hesitated too, though, and he wanted her gone maybe even more. It must be at least as hard for him, mustn't it? Actually, whether or not he had a conscience was still debatable, but Sith were certainly capable of fear.

Still, she couldn't quite find conviction to go with the words. She would have liked to imagine that Malak was frightened too, but she didn't remember him fearing challenge. After all, getting this Star Map, a nightmare for her, hadn't bothered him at all. It wasn't things like this that scared him.

She had scared him.

Ashi didn't care, and neither, she realized, did Revan. She'd always known it, a little; that didn't mean he hadn't loved her. But now—so ironic that she half-suspected the Force had a sense of humor—he frightened her just as much.

Did he? Was it Malak she was scared of, or Alek: all the things her old friend represented? It wasn't Malak himself that scared her, not the Sith Lord with a creepy jaw and his threats of death, but the fact that the fragments of her past were still chasing her. It frightened her, more than anything, because of how all of it really was inescapable.

Waves of kolto surrounded her, their dark undulating motion strange and unnerving. A convulsion of claustrophobia shuddered through Ashi, and she felt a shimmering panic rising within her. Was this even a path, or just the currents parting the plants for a moment, to close behind her back a moment later? She turned in a slow, fearful circle, losing a little more of her sense of direction with every step. She was lost, honestly and truly. Maybe it didn't matter if she chose to come back or not. Maybe she wouldn't anyway.

But I have to go back, she thought foggily. I'm their only hope.

_Then history really does repeat itself, doesn't it?_ The voice was cruel and biting, and Ashi would have flinched, but for the fact that there was nothing to flinch away from when it came from inside. _You're their only hope now, just like you were in the Mandalorian War. But _everyone_ knows what comes next in the pattern._

But it's _not_ repetition, protested the original voice unexpectedly. It's a redemption.

And just like that, cold, startling clarity rushed over her like a waterfall, shocking her suddenly back to herself. _Redemption. _She wasn't repeating anything, and she sure as hell wasn't _lost_. She was a Force-sensitive, for space's sake; how could she be lost when she was so connected? The Force ran deep through her blood and lived under her skin, tying her to the rest of the universe. As long as it was there, she was anchored.

She closed her eyes, breathing deeply, and reopened them after a pause. Her new world was sketched out in shades of gray. A faint, milky blue wavered around her—the kolto, presumably—but was hardly noticeable. What she did see was a faint reddish glow in the distance: the Star Map. She knew where to go.

Suddenly her steps were surer, more even. All of Ashi's concentration was on the spark she saw in the distance. Occasionally a firaxa flitted past, a ghosting blur of orange, but as now that she could see them, they weren't half as frightening. She hardly noticed the water dragging against her, or the kolto that swirled around her; not even its winding, writhing strands, eager to seize her and hold her captive, could break her concentration. All she could see was the red before her, ever growing stronger, and all that mattered was the fact that for once in her fracking life, she knew where she was going—

And then, quite suddenly, she stumbled into the open. The surprise of it snapped her out of her Force vision, and she blinked hard, adjusting to her regular eyes. She stood at the edge of a wide expanse of sand. To her left snaked a chasm, five times as wide as the one from the Shyrack Caves, a lifetime ago, and probably ten times as deep. Teetering over its edge was a hunk of metal that Ashi realized after a moment was a harvester. She could feel tremors in the sandy ground from its machinery, despite her distance. The pulse of its machinery thudded in the pit of her stomach.

Ahead of her wound a new path, a thousand times more decisive than the one she came from. A console was visible partway along it, and she had seen enough, and remembered enough, to know the Star Map was at the other end.

She paid none of those things any attention.

Floating above the chasm, halfway between her and the Map, was the largest thing she'd ever seen. It was bigger than the Krayt dragon, something Ashi hadn't even thought possible, and—impossibly—even uglier. Its scaly skin was murky and mottled, and huge, serrated teeth hung over its jaws, practically tusks. It didn't even seem to be baring them: evolution had simply spited the creature with a grin that didn't fit in its mouth. Huge fins like sails moved with the water, keeping it suspended in the exact same place as it surveyed the sea floor below it.

Ashi could see only one of its dark golden eyes. That was good; had she seen two, she could probably never have forced herself to keep going. She wanted to attempt the Force-vision again, but didn't think she could have mustered it under the massive shark's gaze. Instead, horribly exposed, she took a few steps out into the open.

The eye—bizarrely, almost feline, like a cat surveying its prey—darted to her. For a moment, Ashi felt her heart stop, but the firaxa only surveyed her uninterestedly. Apparently she wasn't worth its attention. Somehow, Ashi couldn't bring herself to be offended.

Quicker, more hopeful footsteps carried her to the console, where she stopped. It seemed to be the place Sammy had described: she could see the controls for the harvester laid out in perfect rows. Ashi reached for one knob, before hesitating. The scientist's detailed list of instructions was slipping from mind like sand through an hourglass, and every breath used a little more air, and… and…

Her communicator buzzed.

Ashi took a moment, in the clumsy suit, to answer, but when she did her reply was brisk and impressively calm. "Hey, remember the Krayt dragon?"

The voice was Carth's. "Yes…?"

"There's a shark that's even bigger." Ashi glanced up at the mutant firaxa as she spoke. There was something akin to intelligence sparkling in the creature's eye, and she got the uncomfortable and irrational feeling it was listening.

"Bigger than a Krayt dragon?" Strangely, he didn't sound dubious. Something that could only be called worry was coloring his tone. "Space, Ashi, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she reassured him, vaguely surprised. "It's not doing anything."

"Where are you?"

"Close to the Map. But I've got to do something first."

"What?" Now, he sounded nervous.

"I'm trying to get rid of the shark."

"To _kill_ it?"

"No, appease it."

Her tone was ludicrously matter-of-fact, containing none of the madness that, to him, went with the words. "It's a fish!" he snapped, his words even more incredulous than the last ones. "You can't reason with a _fish_!"

"It's a smart fish."

That might have been a lie. She couldn't really tell, but the firaxa did seem more intelligent than the ones that had been attacking her. It was watching her lazily now, still apparently not interested enough to eat her. Ashi inwardly appreciated that.

Carth heaved a sigh. "Fine," he said irritably, not bothering to hide his skepticism. "How are you going to _appease_ the fish?"

"Uh… one sec." Ashi hesitated, her fingers working across the panel in front of her. She pressed a button, and the harvester reached out a claw, snapping at the open water like a pincer. Ashi flinched, breath catching—_damn, wrong one_—but the beast seemed unbothered. She eyed the screen suspiciously, and then reached for a new key. Her fingers moved almost mechanically as they sliced through the system: so confident that no one would have guessed she was improvising.

_Are you sure you wish to activate self-destruct mode?_

_Yes_.

The screen in front of her began to flash yellow and red, and Ashi took it as a good sign when the word '_warning_' started to scroll across it. It seemed she'd managed to set the harvester to explode. She couldn't help a very small feeling of pride as she began to back quickly away. The massive shark—which was not looking quite so intelligent any more—was still in the same place, coolly watching the now shuddering harvester. Ashi wondered if the blast could even affect it.

"What's going on?" demanded Carth. Ashi almost jumped; she had forgotten he was waiting for a reply.

"There's going to be an explosion in a couple seconds," she cautioned, struggling to move more quickly. "Don't freak out, okay?"

"An explosion?" He sounded almost disbelieving, but mostly resigned. "Why do things always explode when you're—"

But Ashi never heard the end of the sentence, because at that moment a massive blast tore the harvester to pieces. A visible shockwave rippled through the water, knocking her flying. She swore under her breath as she struggled to get back to her feet; her environment suit wasn't made for being tossed around like this. The firaxa was still floating, unmoving, above the rift. It seemed even the force of the blast couldn't hurt it. She felt inexplicably resentful.

"Ashi?" Concern, audibly unbidden, smothered the word.

"I'm fine," she muttered. "Everything's fine." Her eyes were glued to the fish. It stared down at where the machinery had been, and then opened its mouth.

A rich, low note echoed through the water. It rang like a bell in Ashi's ears, the resonation almost too deep for her to hear, and she swallowed hard against a flicker of giddiness. The fish's eyes found her, staring for a brief moment, before it turned and, with a flick of its tail that probably could have created a tsunami, propelled itself down into the rift.

She didn't bother to stare after it, either. Obviously it was satisfied, and ergo she was in the clear concerning mad Selkath—both good things. She felt no guilt about the harvester. After all, it was only helpful when real fighting was happening, and she was steps from finding the key to ending the war.

This new path she turned to and started down was broad and wide, but it could have been nonexistent for all she cared. The Star Map was calling to her, tendrils of energy snaking from it through the Force and tugging her closer. Through the dark, murky water, she almost didn't see it until she took another step and found herself in a wide, open clearing.

The Map's three segments spread like flower petals before her. Malak had showed her this clearly, and it was vaguely familiar to Ashi. Somehow, the dark, icy segments had resisted nature, and gleamed in the light of her lamp, brighter and far less rusty than any metal at the bottom of the ocean had a right to be.

She approached it slowly, warily. The grating screech as it opened was muffled, but a light—her fifth she'd seen as Ashi, but her tenth in total—still rose, illuminating the clearing. It wavered, suspended, for a moment, and then the map itself appeared.

Ashi took a step closer, hands rising to shield her face as she squinted. Suddenly, her eyes widened.

The coordinates—the final ones. She knew where the Star Forge was. In a moment, images exploded through her head: the factory, rising over a star; her first steps through its halls, empty spaces untouched by life for eons; the ships and droids, not to mention the new robes and mask, that appeared at her beck and call, making the universe hers for the taking.

"Yes!" burst from her lips, a near-silent exclamation, before she could stop it. _I did it! _Her fingers trembled as she slid them from their sleeves, entering the numbers hurriedly into her datapad. She couldn't waste time.

Her eyes darted up, checking her numbers were right, and then she turned, hurrying away. The fading light and rapidly falling darkness told her that the Map had closed. Good riddance—she never wanted to see another one of those in her life.

"I've got the coordinates," she murmured back into the comm, as she began to make her way along the path again. "I'm on my way back, okay?"

"Got it," said a new voice, Dustil this time. "Let us know when you get here. We found a new exit on the south side of the base."

"Great." She allowed herself a small grin. She had done it: she had the Star Forge's location, she'd made it through the water, and she was on her way back. Home free, practically. She was well aware of the thousands of tons of water that pressed down on her, but the fear was in the back of her mind now, and, if still present, then no longer overwhelming. She passed Kono and Sammy's base after a while, and almost debated stopping, but decided against it. After all, everyone else was waiting, and just because she wasn't having a breakdown any more didn't mean she wanted to stay down much longer.

Even as she began to push her way blindly through the kolto fields, though, she couldn't focus on her worry. She sensed the base where her friends waited on the edge of her perception, and it was enough of a beacon to guide her. Though she had fallen from the nirvana of her trip towards the Map, the feeling of utter connection now absent, it was still reassuring. She knew that she couldn't be lost.

And in the relief of the moment, she had forgotten, momentarily, that even Jedi weren't invincible.

However, she was reminded sharply when her suit gave an ominous beep. It jarred Ashi from her Force-vision; she blinked hard, in time to see the words 'low oxygen level' flash in front of her eyes. She gasped and then immediately closed her mouth, pressing her lips together. How much longer did that give her? A minute? Five—ten? She was at least five minutes from the station at the rate she was going, slowed noticeably by the heavy suit and the water pressure. She set off, footsteps sped by fear. Fresh, eager panic was clouding her mind, stopping her from seeing with anything but her eyes, but it didn't matter. She knew enough to know where she was going.

Yet that made no difference. Ashi was still a minute from the station when she realized it was too late. She couldn't find enough air left; no matter how much she gulped in, it made no difference. Her breathing became shallow and ragged as she struggled to find oxygen, but every breath seemed to leave her lungs less full than before.

She swallowed violently, her throat dry and convulsive. There was a burning pain growing in her chest, and a lightheadedness slipping over her. Spots began to dance in front of her eyes as she stumbled toward the hazy station. Her feet were dragging, and she stumbled over and over, desperation the only thing pulling her back up.

She needed help… someone to help her…

_The comm!_

The thought came in an instant of clarity, and she grabbed onto it, before panic could wrench it away. Her fumbling hand took a few seconds to find the button, which was a few seconds more than she would have liked, but the buzz of static in her ear told her when the link was on. She couldn't spare time to find out if there was someone there: her sight was graying and the burning in her chest was even more intense now, less uncomfortable and very much more painful.

"Help!" she rasped, her voice hardly above a whisper, and all she could manage. "Help, I'm out of air!" The words were punctuated with choked, convulsive breaths. "Frack, are any of you there? _Help me!_"

"Ashi?"

The voice was so stupidly comforting that she was stunned into silence for a moment, and managed to trip yet again. "You're out of air?" he demanded, but he didn't need to. He could hear her desperate shallow breathing, and anyway, he knew she wouldn't ask for help unless she needed it. "Damn, Ashi… Ashi, are you okay, can you hear me?"

"What? Frack, no, I'm not okay!" she snapped, and he almost laughed, before worry stopped him.

"Where are you?"

"Close," Ashi mumbled; she couldn't give a better answer than that. She was dizzy, and her voice was fading as her breathing became uneven. She didn't care if he hated her really—all that mattered was that he was here right now. "Carth, stay with me," she whispered.

"I'm here," he said instantly. Her helpless, quickening breath felt horribly loud in his ears. "Ashi, hang in there, I'm here. Please, Ashi, just a little further."

Never had Carth felt so helpless. Even held in stasis, he could at least attempt to fight it. She must have been so close by now, and yet he could do nothing; and he couldn't lose her.

Ashi didn't reply. There was a ringing in her ears that she couldn't hear past. Then, just as she staggered, her hand caught on something, and with a deep flood of relief she realized it was the side of the base.

"Where… am I?" she demanded faintly, her voice almost nonexistent for lack of air. "Where's the door…?"

"Left," he said immediately, and Ashi felt unexpectedly grateful at how calm he always was. Maybe there was a little—just a little—to be said for being a soldier. She stumbled the way he had instructed, feeling around blindly, until her flailing hand caught on something.

She yanked on the barely-visible door handle, trying to wrench it open, but her arm was weak and her muscles uncooperative. Hopelessly, she pounded against it. Water dragged at her hands, slowing her movements, and the combined effect meant she could hardly move at all.

"Help!" she screamed, but it came out near inaudible. Her vision was almost completely gone, and she felt like she was drowning, even though she had the suit on. First she was falling into a sea of darkness, being pulled down and under, with the world tilting under her feet… and then she was stumbling forward, and there was someone pulling her…

Or was there? Was any of it real, or was this just what she thought was happening, now that her mind was too lost to make sense of anything?

She pitched forward, staggering giddily—that, at least, she was sure of—and a sharp noise of metal on metal burned in her ears. A moment later, strangely enough, she felt the pressure in her chest cease. An irrational relief flooded through her, as if she suddenly had no need of air any more. Maybe she didn't. Was it possible for your body just to give up? _Kind of fracked-up_, speculated a hazy, errant thought, _that I'd get through all that just... just for... this..._

And then there came black, which in the single moment before her mind shut down entirely, Ashi decided she liked better. At least that she could understand.

* * *

She heard the voice long before she saw the figures. They were far away and distorted, like she was listening from underwater or the end of a tunnel. "…Ten minutes!" one was saying, his words nearly a shout. For a moment, Ashi tried, but couldn't quite connect the voice to a person through her hazy mind. It was hard to focus enough even to comprehend what he'd said: she knew the words, recognized the gist, but found herself feeling as if she were listening to syllables rather than anything coherent.

"Look, I don't know what to do! I'm not a healer, Dad!" snapped another person, this one younger. "Damn, we need Jolee or something… I don't know how to do this!" He sounded frantic. Everything still seemed muddled and nonsensical to Ashi, and it was proving beyond her to try and force some meaning out of them. With little apology, she gave up, choosing instead simply to listen to the voices.

The older one spoke again after a pause, apologetic this time. "I'm sorry," it said slowly. "But, still… how long was she without air? Shouldn't she have woken up by now?"

Their voices were clearer now, and she could hear the uncertainty in the younger one. "I don't know. Only a few minutes—not _long_, right? I don't _think_ that's enough for serious damage…"

His voice trailed off. They were both considering how unhelpful 'I think' sounded.

"Interjection," said a new voice suddenly, this one distinctly metallic. "If the meatbag in question was not my master, I might point out how tragically frail you meatbags are. I find your reliance on oxygen to be a fatal weakness."

The older voice growled, "_Don't _say fatal!" but Ashi wasn't listening. In a sudden leap of comprehension, she had made the connection from the mechanical voice to her rather unique droid. _HK_, she thought, pictures of flamethrowers and glowing red eyes drifting foggily to mind.

"Unless you want to be helpful, HK," cautioned the younger voice, but Ashi wasn't listening to that. The older voice was talking again.

"Ashi," it said gently, "Ashi, can you hear me? Come on, beautiful, wake up."

Unexpectedly, a hand touched her face. It was careful but warm, telling her in an instant how cold she herself was, and she sucked in a sharp gasp. "Whoa," teased the younger one. Talk about the magic touch, Dad."

Ashi could hear a smile in his voice. Wait… and, _dad_, he had said… so it was Dustil! Which meant, then, that the hand was… _Carth?_

Ashi, now even more confused, decided it might be time to get an explanation. She opened her eyes, and coughed.

She was lying on an expanse of cold metal floor, but she wasn't overly cold herself—a familiarly lurid jacket was wrapped around her shoulders. The ceiling above her was metallic gray, and dripping rhythmically. She only saw it for a moment, however: almost immediately, her view was blocked by three faces, one of them gleaming red metal and the others human. Of those two, one was older and one young, but they bore matching expressions of immense relief.

"Exclamation: master! Oh, joy; you are alive!"

"What were you _thinking?_"

"You almost died!"

Ashi sat up slowly, grinned hopefully, and replied, with impressive brightness, "Oops."

Dustil sighed in relief, satisfied that she was fine, but Carth was in her face before she was expecting it. He grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her angrily. In retrospect, a bad idea—Ashi being both one of the galaxy's most powerful Jedi and dizzy to begin with—but both seemed to have slipped his notice.

"What the hell?" he demanded. "Freezing us so you could go? Of all the low-down, sneaky tricks to pull on us, freezing us? So we couldn't argue?"

Ashi couldn't find a good way to reply—after all, he was right: it hadn't been close to fair of her—so she tried instead to pull away. "Let go," she said softly, hoping to appeal to his chivalrous side. "You're hurting me."

It worked, to some extent; he let go and shifted back, looking grudgingly apologetic. Indignantly, and very carefully, she got to her feet, but he wasn't done. "What the hell gave you the right, Ashi?"

"Nothing," she admitted, trying to sound sincere, but defensiveness faded hard. "Except I was the only one who could do it. Unless you learned to find your way through a kolto field with your _mind_ recently?" she added, raising her eyebrows defiantly.

Carth stumbled for a moment, a little of the anger slipping away. "But… but you could have been killed!" he protested. "You nearly were!"

Things were becoming a little clearer now, and Ashi remembered running out of air. That had been pretty bad. But still, she was fine now, wasn't she?

She shrugged. "But I wasn't?" she offered. "That's not bad."

He closed his eyes, shaking his head tiredly. "That's not important. You—"

Ashi frowned in mock offense, even though it was offset by a playful grin tugging at her lips. "I thought that was pretty important," she interjected. "To me, anyway."

Immediately, he began to backpedal. "Damn it, Ashi, I didn't mean… it's not that that's not important that you're here, it's just that… I mean, if you… I don't… you know what, never mind," he muttered darkly, turning away. "Just… just forget I said anything."

Ashi paused, but then decided that pestering him into talking might not work very well. Frankly, she was surprised she'd gotten that far without the conversation getting nasty. After a moment's deliberation, she let him stalk away without commenting. He was clearly still angry at her—even though, she realized belatedly, she still hadn't gotten in a word about all this face-touching business.

It didn't matter, though; the next second, she was mobbed by HK. "Reproach: that was very unfair, master," he said sullenly. "I would have been most distressed if you had perished and left me alone with the _other_ meatbags." Ashi bit down a smirk at the contempt in his tone. "They lack your unparalleled enjoyment of violence, which is most admirably un-meatbag-like."

Ashi nodded. "Thank you, HK," she replied seriously. "I pride myself on my non-meatbag-likeness, you know."

HK stopped, mid-step, and his head swiveled to look at her. "Suspicion: I feel you are mocking me, master. This is very cruel of you, even if that is a worthy trait much of the time."

She shook her head. "I would never mock you, HK, I promise. Why don't you go ahead with Carth? You can go scare that merc some more," she offered.

His eyes brightened—really brightened, lighting up with eagerness like stoplights. "Gratitude: thank you, master. Have I mentioned how kind a master you are recently?"

"I'm flattered," Ashi grinned. "Hurry up, or he'll get on board and you'll miss your chance."

HK, eyes still alight with excitement, hurried off quickly; he obviously wasn't about to miss a chance to indiscriminately frighten something. Ashi smirked, but it faded as she noticed Dustil falling in step beside her. Quickly, she assumed an expression of what she hoped was remorse.

"Hey, kid," she muttered, glancing over at him. "You mad, too?"

However, to her surprise, Dustil shook his head, and Ashi cautiously allowed the grin to resurface. "Nah," he replied. "I know you're the only one who could have done that. I mean," he clarified, almost as an afterthought, "it was pretty bad when you ran out of air, but I get it." To her surprise, he smiled as he glanced over at her. "But I do think," he added slyly, "that this means you owe me some action at the next fight."

Ashi bit down a laugh—space, sometimes it was hard to believe Carth could even be related to someone like this, but other times he was just like his father. "Better ask your dad about that one. I don't know how he'd feel about a Dustil versus Malak showdown."

Dustil gave a brief laugh, but then shook his head seriously. "Not a chance. Malak's yours."

"You sound awfully sure about that."

He raised a shoulder, at a loss for an explanation. "It's fate, isn't it? You know, if you're a Jedi and all." There, he smiled dryly, obviously no more impressed by their teachings than she was. "But I know… it's gotta be you two, right? You and Malak. I just want in on the Star Forge battle. That's reasonable," he added hopefully.

Ashi raised an eyebrow. "Hey, do you see me arguing? I'm fine with it. _But_," she added hastily, "when Carth asks, it's your idea."

Barely were the words out of her mouth than hey heard Carth's voice from down the hall: "_Come on, the submersible's ready!_" "Speak of the devil," Ashi muttered, but she and Dustil both hurried to the hangar, slipping into their seats in the Republic vessel. Moments later, it pulled away and set off towards the surface.

Within minutes, Ashi was humoring Dustil with descriptions of the giant firaxa—_no, I'm not kidding; this was the biggest fracking thing I've ever seen in my _life—and HK was making absent threats to the mercenary with eerily humanlike pleasure. Carth sat in silence. Outwardly, he looked focused on steering, but inwardly he was deep in thought. After Ashi had frozen them and left… he'd been angry, certainly, but more terrified than anything else. Fear was an unusual emotion for him, one supposedly pounded out of him during his Republic training, and one he didn't remember truly feeling since he'd first heard the words '_Telos_' and '_Sith bombing_' in the same sentence. However, in that cold, dripping room, he'd remembered what it felt like. A curling in the pit of his stomach, icy fingers running along his spine, nightmare pictures flashing like train cars through his mind. More then anything else, concern.

For her.

But she'd made it, more or less fine, and of course she had. She was Ashi; she always did.

It was a moment later that he realized, funnily enough, that that _was_ his first thought, the correction _Revan_ only trailing to mind a moment later. He hadn't pictured her as an enemy when she was swearing at him through the comm-link, voice hoarse from lack of air. She'd just been herself, and he was almost certain that it had, in fact, been Ashi talking. He'd been frantically reading double into anything she said for the past couple weeks, trying to figure out how _Ashi_ a thing it was to say, but nearly anything could be suspicious under the right kind of scrutiny.

But suddenly how Ashi-like it was hadn't mattered, even though a plea for help was the one thing he'd never expected to pass her lips. It was just her, the same person he'd always been, and the terror of almost losing her was something Carth knew he couldn't take a second time. He knew now without a doubt that he couldn't manage if she didn't stay alive during and beyond their quest. He needed her to live past the Star Forge, just like he'd needed her to live past Saul. She was still herself, and they still… _he_ still couldn't do it without her.

He would have to talk to her, he realized, as soon as they got underway.

* * *

"You're alive!"

"And you're stating the obvious," replied Ashi, clambering from the submarine with an inward sigh of relief. She was fiercely fighting the urge to collapse to the ground and never get up—all that water, not to mention the near-asphyxiation, had taken its toll on her. To her eternal shame, she found herself stumbling slightly, but a hand was on her shoulder, steadying her.

She shook Carth off irritably, in time to nearly be knocked over by Mission. Ashi caught herself with one hand on the sub, staggering backwards. "You're _alive_," Mission repeated joyfully, pulling back. "You're okay, right? Like, no one died or anything?"

"Not quite," Ashi muttered, and before Mission could ask what she meant, she caught sight of Dustil. Apparently he needed a hug too, for the girl raced to give him one. Ashi straightened experimentally, brushing herself off, and made her way to the door. Canderous leaned against the wall nearby it, shooting fearsome looks at any Republic technician stupid enough to come within his sight.

"You worried too, Ordo?" she wondered aloud, and he laughed.

"I'd be disappointed if a little water could get the better of Mandalore's conqueror," he replied dryly. There was a momentary silence while his eyes moved once, leisurely, around the room, and then he observed, "That Twi'leki girl doesn't shut up."

Ashi followed his gaze to find Mission interrogating Dustil at a mile a minute, and a grin widened on her face. "Have you been listening to her long?"

"She's been here a while," Canderous shrugged. "Think she was worried."

"Whereas you're above worry."

"Something like that," he replied calmly, ignoring the sarcasm.

"_You're back!_"

"Damn it," Ashi muttered, spinning at the voice. Roland Wann strode into the room, a politician's congenial smile on his face. It seemed more than a little forced when he caught sight of Canderous, and for a moment his eyes lingered on the ludicrously huge Mandalorian blaster strapped across the warrior's back. "Yes, we're back," she replied, wondering why there was a need to affirm it.

"Excellent, excellent." Wann attempted to make eye contact with Canderous, but when the warrior's lips curled into a distinctly frightening grin, he abandoned the man in favor of Ashi. "And how did it go?"

"Well…" Ashi began, biting her lip. Canderous chuckled under his breath, and she stepped pointedly on his foot. It was like trying to stomp on a brick, and she doubted he even felt it. "I found out what was killing everyone," she offered.

His eyes widened. "And it was?"

"This giant shark," Ashi said, feeling more and more idiotic with every word. "It managed to drive all the Selkath and the firaxa crazy, but we figured that out."

"Wonderful. And so the harvester is working as planned again?"

She took a deep breath. "Well, the thing is, you don't exactly have a harvester any more."

Wann's smile shrunk by a couple of molars. "I'm sorry?"

"You don't have a harvester any more. Or a research team. Or part of your base," Ashi clarified. She didn't need to look over, or to be a Jedi, to sense the growing smirk on Canderous's face.

"Why… not?"

"Well…" Ashi glanced away from his every more murderous stare, and her eyes lit on Carth. "He broke the base," she accused quickly, nodding at the soldier.

Wann turned to Carth, but—and Ashi would give credit where it was due—the soldier was quicker on his feet than anyone expected. "Unavoidable," he said, cutting the man off. "Technically not our fault, as we had no other options. We were fighting off the enemy at the time, you understand."

"Ah." Wann's smile reappeared instantly, and he clapped the soldier on the back. "Good man! Show those Sith bastards what's coming to them, eh?"

"_Good man?_" Ashi demanded to Canderous through her teeth, and he shrugged.

But then Wann rounded on her again. "You still haven't explained why the Republic's harvester is destroyed," he said grimly, "and I doubt _that_ happened in combat as well."

Ashi sighed, rolling her eyes. "No, it didn't," she muttered, her tone making it clear that this was painfully obvious. "I blew it up."

His jaw dropped, and he went very pale. "Blew… it up?" he echoed numbly.

"Had to. I was driving off the shark. There were no other options," she added hopefully.

"Options?" Wann repeated incredulously. He stared at her, his face turning slowly to a nasty shade of purple. "_Options? _Of course there were options!" he shrieked. "Kill the fracking fish! Poison it! The ventilation system was made to control the damn firaxa in the first place!"

"I couldn't risk the kolto!" Ashi snapped, matching his tone in both anger and volume. "And I saved your researchers, didn't I? I did the best I fracking could!"

"A lot of good _researchers_ will do me," Wann snarled, "if we've been set _years_ behind! Do you have any idea how long it took to build that harvester? To arrange this with the government? This was our _one chance!_" Flecks of spit flew from his lips, narrowly missing Ashi. "Why the hell wouldn't you just kill the fish?" He grabbed Ashi's collar, reaching to shake her.

Two things happened simultaneously. Canderous had a thick hand on his blaster immediately, slipping it from his holster—it was unclear whether he'd forgotten he couldn't use it, or simply didn't care—and Carth was suddenly there, one hand protectively on Ashi's shoulder and the other forcing Wann away. Ashi jerked back out of newly-developed reflex, but she couldn't help but be slightly stunned. What was Carth doing, being protective?

Unless…

_Damn it_, muttered a small, irritable part of her mind, _why does he always decide these things while I'm unconscious?_

She nodded imperceptibly to Canderous and gave Carth a sideways look, and the two both lowered their hands with mutual disappointment. Ashi fixed Wann with a steely look.

"If we're so damn unhelpful," she said, "then maybe the Republic should do their own fracking dirty work next time." She motioned to her friends, indicating the exit with a tilt of her head, and then made her way out, the satisfaction of having the last word buoying her steps. Wann didn't say a word.

She made it about three feet past the entrance, at which point a large group of Selkath materialized in front of her. All of them wore the customary badges of police, and all of them were carrying guns. She waited for them to walk past, but all of them simply stared at her expectantly, shifting to form a half-ring around her group. _No_, Ashi thought desperately_, please, not me_, for she could feel Wann's stare burning holes in her back, but it didn't seem that fate listened.

/You must come with us, human/ gurgled one of the Selkath, pointing at Ashi. /You, and any companions of yours./

A damp flipper grabbed her wrists behind her back, forcing them together. Ashi felt the icy nip of metal nicking her skin, and instinctively struggled away from the handcuffs. "What did I do?" she demanded.

/We detected large amounts of activity below the surface, as well as unauthorized detonations near the Hrakert Rift. The Republic has confirmed that you and your companions were responsible, and as such, you are required to be taken into custody./

Ashi shot Carth a filthy look. "See why I don't like Republic soldiers?"

The hands snatched at her wrists again, this time more forceful. /Will you come quietly/ the Selkath asked evenly, /or will we have to use force?/

Ashi slumped, her struggling ceasing in an instant. Anywhere else, she would have made sure they _had_ to use force, but she didn't really feel like being kicked out. Anyway, Dustil and Mission were there, and she couldn't risk them getting in trouble. The handcuffs closed around her wrists immediately, tightening until they bit into her skin, and Ashi leaned her head back, staring up with barely concealed frustration at the arching ceiling.

"This is so unfair," she declared, fully aware no one was listening. "I didn't do anything wrong at all. And you don't need to handcuff me."

The Selkath behind her grabbed her shoulder, jerking her around with surprising speed. /We either cuff you, human/ he deadpanned, /or we stun you. Which would you prefer?/

Ashi gulped.

"Handcuffs are fine," she conceded. For the corner of her vision, she saw Canderous lift a hand to his mouth, and cough something that sounded suspiciously like '_kinky_', and the moment the Selkath turned away, she mouthed a string of words that, spoken aloud, had the potential to scald ears. He simply smirked. Wann watched from the safety of the Republic embassy, and Ashi was sure to give him a vicious scowl as the Selkath pressed a blaster between her shoulder blades, forcing her to start walking away.

* * *

Conversation had dribbled to a halt: hours in a cage with the same awkward group of people could have that effect. Mission—and unbelievably, Canderous, the lucky bastard—had been let go after it was established the sub only had space for five, and the merc testified in their favor. Unfortunately, however, his loyalty was only reliable while they were his ride off the sea floor, and he was eager to verify that the other four had, in fact, been down in the Rift.

Ashi _hated_ mercenaries.

She laced her fingers behind her head, leaning back with a groan. Her knees were drawn up halfway to her chin as she slumped with her back against the cage bars. It was surely some kind of calculated torture to stick them in cages with only four square feet of floor space.

"This is ridiculous," she stated.

No one replied.

"I mean, I could completely escape if I wanted to. These bars aren't even Force-resistant. I could be off the planet by the time anyone noticed I was gone."

"Why don't you do that, then?" wondered Carth irritably. His implication—_either shut up or leave_—was clear.

"_Because_ I'm stuck with you," Ashi muttered, rolling her eyes, "and you'd mess it up somehow, that's why. I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, but subtlety's not your strong point."

"Me?" he demanded, turning to stare at her. "_I'm_ not subtle? _You're_ the reason we're in here—you and your damn need to blow up anything you possibly can!"

"Well, _you_ can do it next time, Carth, if you could do a better fracking job."

"At least I wouldn't nearly kill myself!"

"Worried about me?" she challenged sarcastically.

"Of course I was!" he snapped. "You were out in the middle of the ocean on your own—what kind of person wouldn't be worried?"

"Canderous," Dustil volunteered helpfully, from his position slumped against the cell's bars.

"Mandalorians aren't people. Republic philosophy, Dustil. You could learn a lot from your father."

"That's not what I sound like, Ashi."

She snorted. "The truth hurts, doesn't it?"

The words hung loudly in the air, and Ashi sighed explosively after a moment of insinuating silence. "Space," she muttered, "I am so _sick_ of all of you reading into what I say. Maybe not everything I say is some kind of reference to Revan, wouldn't that be possib—"

She broke off, mid-word. A moment later, the door to the cells hissed open, and the damp smack of footsteps announced the arrival of a Selkath. He stopped in front of Ashi, surveying her briefly and with distaste. /Greetings, human./

"Greetings." Ashi nodded solemnly, though the Selkath still felt suspiciously like he was being mocked. "Who are you?"

/I am a representative of the court/ he began. /I will be your arbitrator in your trial./

Ashi bit down a groan. _Fracking fantastic,_ she muttered through the Force. _I've got a glorified fish stick representing me._ Dustil was the only one who heard it, but he snickered. The Selkath frowned at the boy as he struggled to keep a straight face.

/First of all/ he continued, /we have some things to clear up./

"Like?" Ashi wondered with badly concealed surprise. She had thought she had done all right, she'd thought, if she'd managed to both save the mutant fish and overcome a childhood phobia. What in space could be wrong with that?

Clanking footsteps of metal on metal mingled with the wet slap of Selkath feet. The next moment, HK-47 appeared in the doorway, handcuffed in energy-suppressant restraints.

There was really no explanation necessary any more.

HK brightened as soon as he saw her. "Greeting: hello again, master!" he exclaimed. "Observation: I see you have also been imprisoned in humiliating conditions by the fish meatbags. Query: shall I blast the fish meatbags and assist you in escaping?"

Ashi lifted a hand and covered her face, hanging her head. _There goes any chance of getting off free_. "Hi, HK," she said quietly. "Not right now, thanks."

He nodded disappointedly. "Resignation: very well, master. I shall await the time when I may do so with deep anticipation."

The Selkath coughed. "There is the matter of your droid. It has mentioned a few rather incriminating events that took place during your time in the underwater station."

_What? But I saved your fracking kolto! I did everything right! _Ashi scowled incredulously at the droid. "Damn it, HK," she snapped, "what in space did you tell them?"

He looked stunningly innocent. "Statement: nothing, master. I simply described the events that took place during our time in the underwater station. Reassurance: do not worry, master; I left out the part where you came undesirably close to dying."

The Selkath interrupted. /If I may quote him directly, he mentioned a "delightfully bloody slaughter of the… err, fishy meatbags"?/

That was so utterly HK that Ashi had to work very hard to keep a straight face. Laughing, after all, was probably not the most tactful of responses right now. "Did you say that?" she demanded furiously of her droid, and HK nodded eagerly.

"Affirmation: yes, master—and may I also mention that I greatly enjoyed the massacre of the fishy meatbags. Suggestion: might we engage in unadulterated violence like that more often, master?"

Ashi paused for a moment, debating languages the Selkath wouldn't know, and then hissed in Mandalorian, /HK, unless you shut up right now, you've got some fracking unadulterated violence coming your way. Do I make myself clear?/ He nodded slowly, and she added, /How about you turn off before you get me condemned, yeah?/

Reluctantly, he obliged, muttering a resentful, "Status: standing by," before flickering off. Ashi sighed in inward relief and then looked back at the Selkath. He was staring at her.

"I apologize," she said quickly, lies flowing smoothly to her lips. "He's a Mandalorian droid, so he's only programmed only to deactivate in response to their language. He also had an unfortunate malfunction in his programming that makes him uncommonly violent." She pointedly ignored Carth's mutter of 'I'll say', continuing, "I plan to try and fix it as soon as I can."

The arbitrator nodded uncertainly. /I see./ He suddenly looked very reluctant. /As I am certain you can see, your case is rather difficult at the moment, and so perhaps—/

Ashi gave a small, irritable sigh, cutting him off mid-word. /Do you want to represent me?/

He blinked. /I… I mean… my job, as city arbitrator—/

/You're not answering my question./

/I… I don't…/

/I'll represent myself/ she declared, speaking over him once again. /I'm pretty sure I can make a better case that you can, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm a little young to die./

His mouth opened, and closed, and opened again, and then as he thought about it, it slowly slipped shut. /Very well/ he said finally, looking uncertain as to whether to be insulted or grateful. /You may represent yourself if you wish. But good luck explaining your droid/ he added viciously—apparently deciding on insulted—as he spun and left the room.

HK, who seemed not to have been as inattentive as he'd looked, perked up instantly at 'droid'. "Exclamation: you tell the fish meatbag, master!" He was frogmarched out of the room, but his voice echoed to them from down the hall. "Offer: if you change your mind about escaping, I shall be happy to—"

The door slammed shut with perfect timing, and Ashi smiled, feeling remotely grateful for having one companion that was utterly consistent.

* * *

**Yeah... well, I'm pretty sure we're all a little grateful for HK. Next up is angst, and Lehon, and the Rakata, and Canderous cursing at the Rakata... yeah--it's gonna be good. R&R, as always; there's nothing better than hearing from you guys :D  
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**--skrybble o_O  
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	28. Marooned

**Hi everyone! As always, thanks for the reviews, which make my day. Seems there's a mostly mutual love for HK around here... now that's what I call good taste X) **

**And in other news, Lehon's *finally* here. Sorry about the late update; I've been horrifically sick :P Bear with me, the Star Forge is coming...  
**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR.

* * *

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**Mar****ooned: abandoned; placed in an isolated and often dangerous position**

Thankfully, it was with a grateful Selkath escort, and not in handcuffs, that Ashi left Ahto City. Her decision to reason with the giant fish—or, at least, not to kill it—couldn't have gone over better with the Selkath, and in half an hour, she had gone from life in jail to the new favorite off-worlder of the Selkath High Court. Dustil and Carth sat off to the side, talking when spoken to and mostly letting Ashi do what she did best.

Dustil quickly took HK back to the ship afterwards, before he could elaborate on their battles with the mad Selkath. Ashi, sure Carth went with them, opted instead to go off on her own. She wanted… no, she had to think. Down in the sea, in the middle of all her panic, she'd had a moment of lucidity. Within that clarity, she _knew_, there'd been confidence—a trait she vaguely knew she'd once had, but certainly couldn't claim now—and she needed it back. The difference between confidence and indifference, once she got to the Star Forge, was going to be the difference between life and death—Malak's, and hers.

Her footsteps took her to a small area, overlooking the water. Amazing how, after all she'd been through, she still shivered at the sight of it, but Ashi ignored that. She made her way to the railing, leaning on it and letting a salty breeze play across her shoulders. Resolutely, she stared out at the waves, refusing to flinch. It was something about the ocean that had prompted that epiphany, and she needed to recover it.

However, there was one thing that already seemed to have changed.

That something approached from behind, announcing its presence with a light tap on her shoulder. Ashi had been distracted, eyes tracing the waves in their hypnotic rise and fall, and she jumped at Carth's touch. Her head flicked sharply to the side, and she looked surprised to find him standing there. For a moment, words spilled up to her tongue, threatening to explode in a rush of candor, but Ashi pressed her lips together, and nothing slipped out. A thousand questions that she wanted to ask faded, like mist burning off under the sun, and she was quiet as he leant on the railing beside her.

"You were brave."

Ashi blinked. "What?" she asked intelligently.

"Down there," he clarified, gesturing at the water. "To go out on your own. It was brave of you."

"I knew where it was," she muttered, shocked to hear herself sounding flattered. "It made sense for me to do it. Anyone would have."

"No," he corrected. "It's something you would do."

Ashi frowned, unsure whether to be insulted. "You mean, because it was stupid?" she asked eventually, rolling her eyes.

"No," he murmured. His eyes followed the ocean as it roared and collapsed in on itself for a million miles, stretching just far enough to blur faintly with the sky. Lips twitching wryly, he added, "_That_ was what not keeping an eye on your oxygen level was." She muttered something that sounded like '_not my fault_', which only widened his grin. "This was just something you would do. But it was brave," he added.

"Oh." She paused, and then replied, "Thanks." Her uncertain tone practically tacked an '_I guess_' onto the end, but even so, he thought he heard the slightest bit of hope in her words. He might have imagined it, but desperately hoped he hadn't.

"It's only going to get tougher from here," she murmured, so unexpectedly he started. "On the Star Forge, I mean. We're going to have to fight Malak now." Technically it wasn't even 'we're'; it was '_I'm_ fighting Malak'—if Dustil could work it out, she sure as hell knew it too—but the point was the same.

"I know." He sighed, grinning tiredly. "We don't get a break, do we?"

Ashi let out a weary laugh. "No one said it was easy, being us."

"Well, one more fight," he shrugged. "Hopefully it'll be a little better after that."

Ashi grimaced absently. "I don't know what I'll do with myself then," she murmured, shaking her head. _You know,_ came the cynical thought,_ if I actually live. Which I may or may not do, depending on my motivation._

It wasn't that she was suicidal—nothing of the sort. But this battle was going to shape the galaxy, no matter how much she hated the melodrama to the words, and she knew that she had to be ready for the fight. No doubt Malak was over the whole 'mercy' thing, and if she got there with anything less than full intent to win, she wasn't going to get so lucky this time.

She did care about that, but much as _living _appealed to her, it was little to cling to. Frankly, it wasn't even that she might die: it was the fact that, like it or not, she had no idea what side she'd end up on when she had to make the choice. After all, few people knew better than her how easy it was to fall, even with the best of intentions, and at the moment there were no perks to either.

She doubted, however, that Carth wanted any of this on his shoulders, and so instead gave a slow grin. "Probably have to go to a bunch of ceremonies and stuff, right?" she speculated. "Being saviors of the galaxy, and all."

"One thing at a time," he advised with a grin. "But… yeah. Probably."

"Think I can bring HK?"

Carth laughed aloud at the imagery rising to mind. "I think that would make it far more interesting," he said finally, "although I can't see the Jedi approving."

Ashi snorted disdainfully. "If we save the galaxy"—_sure, _if_ we do_—"I'll be damned if anyone can tell me what to do."

"As if they've ever been able to," he pointed out. She grinned, and he shook his head, always amused by her idea of a compliment.

They stood in silence for a moment, what seemed like a comfortable one—possibly the first of that kind they'd had in weeks. Ashi was even starting to enjoy the mutual lapse to the past, more than she would ever admit, before something occurred to Carth. Ashi had been terrified of water barely a day ago, and now she was standing by the ocean, watching it voluntarily.

"Why are you here? By the water, I mean," he clarified, at her puzzled look. "I thought you didn't like it."

Ashi made a face. "I don't," she said, matter-of-factly. "I hate it. But I have to think."

"And you have to be around water for that?"

She hesitated, mouth half-open, debating a reply. "Something happened," she said finally. "Down underwater. I had… an answer, I think."

"To what?" he prompted.

"Everything. This." She gestured to herself with a shrug. "Revan. I thought I knew what to do about it—I mean, I felt like I knew… what to _do_, except…" She turned back to the ocean with a huff that send a couple strands of hair flying up in the air. "Except it's fracked up now, and I can't remember what I was thinking to begin with."

He paused. "What kind of answer?"

"How to stay good." She was sure of that, at least, and it was reflected in her tone. "I know I shouldn't turn back to the dark side, and all, but I don't know how _not_ to. Last time, the Star Forge was our point of no return." It was amazing, really, how easily the words came. "I know that if I'm going back, I need to be stronger this time. I've got to know how not to turn, and I don't."

Carth hesitated, intensely aware of how far he was out of his depths. "But can't you just… stay good?" he asked, feeling the stupidity of the question like a sledgehammer blow a moment after he spoke.

"It's harder than that," Ashi said, sounding patient but tired. She was exhausted of the facts she explained, if not of explaining. "It'll get to me, through the Force. It gets in your head, you know? Messes you up from the inside, out."

"That's what it did before?"

She nodded, jaw clenching. "I wish…" she started, and then stopped. "I need a way to know I can stay good. Half the time, the dark side feels so… so _inevitable_, you know?"

He stared, her chosen adjective startling him. "You're already sure you'll fall?" he demanded, almost taking a step back in horror.

Ashi's face flooded with alarm. "No!" she protested, but then, more quietly, "I just don't know if I'll be able…_ not_ to." She paused and then gave a sudden, explosive sigh, dropping her head into her hands. "I need to be better, Carth," she murmured, not looking up at him. "It won't be enough just to be good, right? Not for everyone else. It won't be enough just to be myself any more."

He almost put a hand around her shoulders, before the taboo stopped him. "It worked fine before," he offered instead, second-rate comfort.

"The galaxy's not going to welcome me with open arms," she reminded him, eyes bitter and dark as she glanced back up. "I need to be stronger this time. I've got to be… _more_ than just good, right?"

She was grasping for words, frustrated in her inability to explain. "So you want to be superhuman," he replied slowly. The words, somewhere between his mouth and ears, suddenly sounded very Sith-like, and he was glad when Ashi shook her head.

"They'll _expect_ me to be superhuman," she corrected. "I'll do the best I can."

Her eyes were fixed on the horizon, gleaming in the light from the afternoon sun. There was steel in them, but it looked more like a shield than real conviction. "We don't expect anything from you," Carth replied. "Just that you make the right choice."

Ashi pursed her lips, a glint of humor in her eyes. "Yeah," she shrugged, "but that's pretty relative, isn't it?"

"You know what I meant!" he snapped. She snickered—poking fun at him was apparently enough to cheer her up—but then sobered unexpectedly.

"The right choice," she repeated thoughtfully. "I'll work on it."

She gave the ocean one more hopeful look, waiting for a revelation that she knew, deep down, wasn't coming. Nonetheless, her face still fell in disappointment when it didn't. Ashi turned on her heel, her steps becoming brisk and businesslike almost immediately. "Come on," she called, over her shoulder, and Carth had to hurry to catch up.

"What about your answer?"

"It's not there," she replied, too distracted to lie and so not bothering to conceal her frustration.

"Will you be all right?"

For just a second, Ashi's footsteps stuttered, and she stopped, taking a deep breath. "I hope," she said honestly, more of an admittance than a statement.

"That's not good enough," Carth said flatly.

Ashi's shoulders, previously slumped, tensed. "What?" she demanded turning back to face him, but even though there was anger in her voice, there was something else as well. The faintest touch of eagerness told him that she was glad he was fighting her. She wanted to be contradicted, Carth realized, to be _pushed_—she wanted someone to make her make the right decision.

"You can't hope you'll make the right choice," he said determinedly. "You have to know that you _will_."

Ashi's eyes flared, the fire in them rivaling that of her hair. "So _help_ me, then," she said fiercely, challenge burning on her lips and in her face. "So why don't you _give _me a reason, Carth?"

_Like you did before._ It went unsaid, but they both thought it, both knew what she meant. _She wants a reason_, Carth thought numbly, _from you, what are you waiting for, _say_ something… _and Ashi couldn't breathe: _why did you say that—do you just like letting him screw you over? Is that it? Do you want to just let him play with you like that, you idiot—like you're not already fracked-up enough…_

"We're your reason," he said lamely.

Ashi shook her head: disappointed, relieved, miserable and thankful at the same time. _Hell of a lot of good that'll do against Malak_, came a bitter thought, but she made no reply but to turn and walk away.

Well, after all, no one had said being good was going to be easy.

* * *

"Space," Carth mumbled, stunned. "I've never seen anything like it."

The Star Forge, looming before them, was enough to steal any chance of words from the room. The giant station grew from the star like a massive weed, its supports rooted deep in the hissing, spitting fire; it towered like a hundred thousand Leviathans, almost a planet in itself. Ships, specks of silver that glinted in the starlight, danced around it, patrolling and reminding Ashi too much of firaxa.

But she was unperturbed—or, if not, then at least doing a brilliant job of acting it. "It's pretty big," she agreed nonchalantly, eyeing the station nonchalantly. "So, do we call the Republic now, or what?"

Though they had sent the final coordinates to Admiral Dodonna immediately, they were still stuck waiting. The Republic ships were far from the Star Forge's desolate perch on the Rim: it would be five or so days' travel in the Ebon Hawk, but with a fleet that size, a week and a half would be lucky—in short, that meant that, even now, there was a week's time to wait.

"I'm confirming the coordinates for the admiral," he nodded. "Maybe a quick strike from the Republic can cripple the fleet."

"How exciting."

"Now, we just wait for the Republic to show up."

"I'm getting chills."

He debated snapping back, and reminded himself that she was just trying to annoy him. That didn't change the fact that it was working. As he glanced down at the radar, however, a larger problem immediately caught his attention.

"Squadron of Sith fighters've caught sight of us," he said quickly, eyes narrowing at the six small dots speckling his radar. "Can you take care of them?"

"Space, I might pass out if this gets any more thrilling."

"_Ashi!"_

"Yeah, I'm on it." She still sounded unconcerned, but when she got to her feet and made her way to the gun turret, her footsteps were rapid, belying her real concern. She underestimated Carth, for he did notice, even though he made no comment. Even he knew her well enough by now to understand that at her most difficult, she was also at her most upset.

What he wasn't certain of—though he could speculate—was _what_ she was upset over. Carth wouldn't have been wrong to surmise that _he_ was a factor, but he was hardly the whole problem. The fact that the Star Forge battle was so close was still unreal to Ashi, numb and chilling. She was going to fight Malak in a week, and she was going to have to kill him. It was terrifying: after all, she didn't want to any more than she had before. He was still Alek (part of him, surely, because he wouldn't kill her, would he… right…?)

Except he would kill her, or she still might fall, either way dooming the _entire fracking galaxy_…

There she went, with the thinking in circles. It was probably more productive not to think at all. Besides, Ashi found that her talent lay more in ignoring than in solving issues, and using vicious sarcasm as a cover to anyone who couldn't mind their own problems. Perhaps not the most elegant of methods, but rarely, if ever, had it failed her before.

All six out of six fighters were easily dispelled, long before any of them could have gotten out a signal. Ashi gave a sigh of relief as she slumped back in the chair, and back in the cockpit, Carth flinched at the whistle of static. "Got 'em," she called, indifference reflooding her voice like water breaching a dam.

"Good," he said, relieved. "I'm going to see if I can take cover around the side of the station. The star's heat emission should cover our infrared signal."

It was a good plan. The Ebon Hawk had a rusty sort of stealth unit that could take care of vision, and they wouldn't be on any radars if they could get within the star's range. It was as he began to take the ship in closer that images, without any kind of warning, started to flicker behind her eyes.

…_Standing over a gleaming silver console…_

"Carth?" It can out uncertain; cautionary.

…_Twin black-gloved hands, fingers racing across the keyboard; the word 'Defenses' appeared on the screen before her…_

"_Carth?_" she repeated.

"What?"

…_Shield _on_?_

"_Shield on," a grating metal voice affirmed…_

The memories clicked, and Ashi stiffened, eyes flying open. "Carth!" she shouted into the comm-link, grasping the headset closer to her ear, desperate and yet unheard. "Carth, Carth, no, don't fly that way, no, dammit, there's a shield, there's a shield, there's a— "

The ship jarred violently. With a whine of static and a shudder, the screen in front of her blurred and then went black. A moment later, the lights went out.

"—Shield," Ashi finished flatly, to the empty air.

The ship spun and lurched like a broken carnival ride as she made her way irritably to the cockpit, pausing only to yell, "Grab hold of something!" to anyone within earshot. "So," she wondered, stumbling against the doorframe as the ship swerved, and scowling at the back of his head, "care to tell me what's hard about '_Carth, there's a shield_'?"

"You could have told me before," he growled, hands practically blurring with speed as they darted over the controls.

"Oh, I'm sorry, shall I try to remember Revan's life more _quickly_?"

He muttered something that sounded like _smartass_, and she coughed something that sounded like _useless_, and he was opening his mouth to come back with something much more explicit when an irritable voice from down the hall cut him off.

"Anyone want to explain why the geezer's flying like he's been on an all-night Tarisian ale-drinking binge?" Mission wondered, making her way precariously to the doorway.

"Ashi remembered there was a shield, shortly _after_ we ran into it," Carth explained, not sparing the Twi'leki girl a glance.

"Shortly _before_; it's not my fault that you weren't listening."

"You guys have so much chemistry," muttered Mission, shaking her head.

"Just a little less than you and your boyfriend, huh?"

"Dustil's not my boyfriend!" protested the girl huffily, and Carth started, the ship veering sharply to the right amidst cries of protest from the other two. "You and _Dustil?_" he demanded.

"_No!_" protested Mission, suddenly going a wonderful shade of violet. "We're friends, that's _all_!"

"Talk less and fly better, Carth," Ashi instructed, pulling herself to her feet.

"They're just kids!" he insisted, and Mission scowled.

"Might be a kid, but I could still fly this piece of junk better than you are," she observed snippily.

"She has a point, Carth."

"Fine," he snapped. "Do you want to help?"

"If you can keep the ship straight long enough for me to get into my seat," Ashi grumbled, but she did pull herself into the copilot chair, strapping herself in and activating the backup keyboard before her. "There's one planet in the system—the second moon looks life-sustaining," she said, her voice businesslike in an instant. "Can you take it down there?"

He nodded tersely, guiding the ship down and to the side. A faint blue speck grew before them, expanding slowly into a small turquoise planet. It took Ashi a moment to realize that the blue meant _oceans_, and then that, as they got closer, the planet seemed to be coming at them faster and faster.

"And it would be pointless to say 'be careful'?" she wondered aloud.

"I'm working on it," he muttered back, jaw clenched. Though he didn't look down for a moment, his hands danced, spider-like, across the controls: expertly precise and altogether, far more impressive than Ashi liked to admit. His gaze never wavered from a tiny circle of gold in the middle of the blue that marked the land. It looked very, very small.

She did the little she could, attempting to salvage any part of the computerized system, but the lines of code were blurring before her, stuck in a loop from the disruptor field—and as if she could have concentrated, anyway, what with being thrown near out of her seat every three seconds and the rapidly approaching water.

"Damn," she heard Carth hiss, "this is going to be a rough landing." He glanced over at her, quirking an eyebrow. "Interesting enough for you yet?"

"Don't talk," she replied, watching the atmosphere approach. Her hands tightened on the armrests, the bones in her knuckles tattooed against her skin. "You'll bite your tongue off. Not that anyone would mind, actually."

* * *

And, much as he hated to admit it, she had a point. He might have replied, but for the fact that at the instant her sentence ended, the landing began. Ashi felt herself being shaken in her seat, every bone in her body thrown around. The safety belts dug into her chest, and her head was forced back in the headrest, only to be jerked to the side every other moment.

"I _hate_ atmospheres," she remarked through gritted teeth. Carth was yanking at the controls, guiding them determinedly towards the island. She closed her eyes, reminded altogether too much of their descent, a minute after meeting, towards Taris. Somehow, she remembered that as extremely painful. Sort of like _this_ was turning out to be.

Damn it, there was so much _water._

But Carth was good. No, better than good; to be honest, he was amazing, but she wasn't planning to tell him that and risk the response she'd get. They came hurtling towards the planet at speeds usually only present in scenarios with rapid endings and explosions, but he had a gift. Like a half-dead moth, the ship fluttered down jerkily towards the island, leapt forward, and plowed into the water, coming to a stop inches from where the sand began.

There was utter silence. Carth slumped back, all his breath coming out in a _whoosh _of relief. Ashi stared at the land before them, eyes approximately the size of dinner plates, and then grinned.

"I hope you don't expect me to be impressed."

The pilot turned his head to face her, smiling partially at her words and partly just because they'd survived. "Wouldn't dream of it."

* * *

It turned out a good thing Carth didn't expected anyone's appreciation, for he was to get none. The crew, previously buzzing with anticipation at the sight of the Star Forge, was irritated—to say the least—at the fact they were now stranded on a godforsaken island planet. Words weren't far from turning to blows by the time Ashi intervened.

"Shut _up!_"

They fell silent immediately, mostly out of shock. Ashi rarely, if ever, shouted at them as a collective, and when she did, the shock value of it was enough to guarantee a total silence. "Shut up," she repeated tiredly. "We'd be dead without Carth, okay? It's not his fault. What's important is that we need to get off this planet. Soon."

Everyone was still staring, and Ashi didn't miss Mission and Dustil exchanging a half-conspiratorial, half-excited glance. Unwilling to dwell on what it meant—and certain that, for space's sake, _that _didn't count as chemistry—she turned hopefully to the pilot instead. "So, can the Republic bail us out?"

To all their disappointment, if not surprise, he shook his head helplessly. "Our communications are fried," he explained. "We need to get the parts to repair the ship before we can even think about anything like that—if we don't, this ship won't be flying again. Period."

"Thank you, sunshine," Ashi muttered, turning back the others. "Ideas?"

To her surprise, Juhani spoke. "During our… rather rapid descent," she offered delicately, "I noticed the hulls of many ships scattered across the landscape. Perhaps we could salvage parts from some of them?"

"The Cathar's right," Canderous grunted. "This planet's a technological graveyard. Disruptor field"—and here he snorted, expressing his contempt: possibly for the field itself and possibly for Carth's utter inability to notice it—"must have wiped them all out."

Ashi nodded. "Star Forge's defense mechanism," she explained dully. "Easiest way to get rid of outside ships: screw them over and leave them on Lehon."

"Lehon?" echoed Mission, puzzled.

Ashi grimaced. "Sorry," she said reflexively. "This is Lehon. That's what I think they called it, anyway."

No one particularly wanted to ask who 'they' were, and so Carth instead pounced on the other thing she'd mentioned. "It's the defense mechanism?" he repeated. "So how can we shut it off, if we're not on the Star Forge?"

"We managed before," Ashi shrugged. "There's a… um…" She paused, eyes narrowing in thought, before blurting, "Console! In a temple. We can turn it off from there."

"Where's the… _temple?_" asked Dustil, and, being a teenager, was unable to keep a note of skepticism from his question.

Ashi paused, eyes narrowing thoughtfully, but then shook her head after a moment. "I… don't know," she admitted. "I lost that. Sorry."

Carth wondered momentarily why she was apologizing, and was about to mention that it was all right—contrary to what they said, no one really minded if she couldn't remember. Just as he opened his mouth, however, Canderous cut in.

"We'll find it," he said unconcernedly. "Why don't we go search this planet for something useful, instead of staying here and talking in circles?"

Ashi grinned widely, glancing over at him with genuine gratitude in her eyes. "Best idea we've heard yet," she said happily. "Okay, then: Juhani, Jolee, and Dustil—you all go look for salvage. Listen to Jolee; he knows what to look for. Zaalbar, you, Carth, and T3 see what you can do for the ship. HK…" She hesitated, and finally decided, "Don't kill anything. That means Canderous and… Mission." Here, she would have sworn she saw the warrior flinch, and smirked for a second. "You two are with me."

"Yeah!" Mission chirped, grabbing hold of the blaster she kept on her hip and breaking into an earsplitting smile. Canderous's face, conversely, bore the grim resolve of the doomed. "I might stun her," he warned quietly, following Ashi in Mission's wake off the ship.

"I might kick your ass if you do," she replied. The warrior raised his eyebrows dubiously, prompting her stop and fix him with a stare that, despite her smile, had pure steel in it. "If Zaalbar can put up with her, you can," she said, her tone daring him to contradict.

"Comparing me to the Wookiee?"

"You're not that different," she observed, so seriously that anyone who didn't know her would have missed the sarcasm. "You know: tall, strong, ridiculously honorable… and that's not even including the smell."

"Haven't I told you that annoying a Mandalorian is the last thing most people do?"

"I'm sure Mandalore said something like that," Ashi mused. "You know, right before I _killed him_."

Canderous opened his mouth and closed it irritably after a moment, muttering something darkly in Mandalorian that Ashi didn't bother to catch. Mission had bounded ahead of them, her joy to be both alive and somewhere so beautiful rendering her near-hyperactive. She raced straight onto the sand, spent a couple moments spinning in a wide circle, captivated by a new and seemingly empty paradise, and then turned back to the other two to inquire, "What's the holdup?"

Picking her way determinedly over the water, Ashi jogged up to the girl with a grin. "Some of us are just happy to be alive, Mission."

"Hey, _you_ can't complain," Mission stated, crossing her arms. "Seems to me you're the one who crashed the ship."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "_Carth _crashed the ship," she said adamantly. "I just helped."

"Because you're helpful like that."

"Can't you go bother Canderous?"

Simultaneously, they both turned and glanced back at the warrior. He gave Ashi a glare that was laced with acid, and hefted his rifle pointedly on his shoulder.

"I don't think he's in a good mood," Mission said meekly, quickly looking away.

"As opposed to his usual bubbly self."

The next second, she gasped and staggered back. Something whizzed past her face, cleaving through the air less than an inch from her eyes.

"What the _hell_?" she spat, staggering backwards as her arms pinwheeled for balance. "It was a _joke_, Ordo!"

But as she turned to the Mandalorian, she realized in a flash that the shot hadn't come from him—something to do with the blaster he had out, and was aiming up at the top of the hill. As Ashi squinted, dark silhouettes began to pour over its crest, shouting in a tongue she couldn't quite place or understand. Several of them dropped within moments, victims of Canderous's perfect aim.

Mission, who would never fail to impress Ashi, had her blaster out within moments, picking more figures off with sniper fire. Ashi conjured a shield, drawing her lightsaber. The ambush party had the higher ground, so—for regular people—trying to close the distance for hand-to-hand combat would be suicide.

For most people.

Force speed made her superhuman, and she was running up the hill in instants, dodging the objects in slow motion. As the creatures firing on them came into focus, she realized with vague recognition that they were Builders, and ones she was fairly sure she'd spoken to before. Maybe she hadn't left on very good terms. Their eyes bulged as she met their attack head-on, but, amazingly, they still managed to widen even further as one of them recognized her.

/Revan!/ he gasped, in strange, croaking word, and to her surprise, Ashi understood. The language flooded her mind, exploding from some shadowed corner of her mind, and the suddenness of it stole her breath for a moment.

She lunged for the Rakata—_Rakata_; that was their name—decapitating him before he could let slip another unfortunate word. /I prefer Ashi/ she growled, her accent flawless. If they were surprised at her fluency, they didn't show it. However, they also had little time _to_ show it; her run up the hill, while near-effortless, had rendered them all but helpless. It seemed their strategy of attacking from higher up and far away was their _only_ strategy, which was extremely convenient. Logic would have decreed that nothing could stop her.

Unfortunately, Ashi's life was not always quite as pleasant as logic decreed it should be.

Just before her lightsaber slashed through one of the Rakata's chest, he let out a cry that echoed along the hills. His voice cut off abruptly as he crumpled to the ground, and Ashi had almost disregarded it when a shout came from below.

She whirled—stabbing the final Rakata through the heart as she did, and sending him staggering to the ground—to see that this ambush party was not the only one. Mission and Canderous were now trying to take down a group of Rakata who charged for them and—_wouldn't you know it,_ thought Ashi—seemed to have staffs for close-quarters combat. Canderous's jaw was clenched in frustration: ever since the terentek battle on Kashyyyk, his leg had never been the same, and he knew as well as Ashi that running and close fighting were both now areas in which he fell short.

_Damn_, Ashi thought, as the same thought flew into mind. Half sprinting and half scrambling, she took off down the hill, her speed only half of what it had been on the way up. Her last few steps were stumbled, far from graceful, but she hit the ground running, a few feet from Canderous and Mission. Ignoring the tiredness pulling at her feet, she charged for the Rakata. Her lightsaber sliced through the air, a vicious scythe of pure energy.

_Whoosh._

The almost-inaudible flit of something through the air touched Ashi's ears for just an instant, but a moment later, a yelp came from behind her. There were exactly two people there, and the cry was not Mandalorian. It was also followed almost right away by the small thud of a body to the long, emerald grass.

Ashi's head snapped around before she had even processed what had happened. "Mission!" she gasped, worst-case scenarios already flooding her thoughts. Her eyes flickered frantically over the unconscious girl for any kind of wound, and stopped on a dart protruding from Mission's shoulder—_oh frack, no, not poison, please not poison_…

Ashi's breath lodged in her throat. "Mission," she croaked again, reaching out towards the girl.

The Rakata, unmoved, took aim again.

Pressure thudded between her shoulder blades, the sting of a needle preceding a slow chill that spread like a freezing river down her spine. She began to turn, lead already dragging at her arms. With clumsy fingers, one hand jammed her lightsaber into her belt. Her vision was blurring, the Rakata warriors multiplying before her eyes, but she stumbled towards them anyway, fury carrying her forward. _How_ dare_ they attack Mission…_ she thought, anger flaring viciously in the pit of her stomach. Space help her, she was going to_ kill_ them if that kid wasn't okay…

It was then, just as she staggered sideways, that she heard Canderous bellow, "Lucas!" Ashi cast heavy eyes upwards, and saw a blurry dart speeding, now, towards her face. Unable to duck, she raised an arm limply, and watched it burrow into her wrist. Two or three more followed in instants, and it was then that the chill moved up through her neck, taking her sight with it. She must have hit the ground at some point, but didn't remember it.

* * *

**I have written some disgustingly long chapters so far, but this beat them all, I think (being 14,500 words as of now). Figuring even you guys, the awesomest of readers, don't actually want *that* long a chapter, I split it in two. I'm well aware I'm missing a very vital Ashi/Carth conversation here, but part II is coming ON SUNDAY.  
And, you know, until then, reviews are always appreciated :)**

**--skrybble o_O  
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	29. Motive

**Thanks as always, more than anything, to the people who reviewed. Promising you'll have the other part of the chapter up later is the most surefire way not to get a response, so hearing from you guys made my day. **

**Oh, and Allison Lightning: Carth/Revan scene ending was actually rewritten in response to your message (which I got, read, and then realized 'my god, who does just go with someone saying that?) so, if not AU, still not too choking-on-fluff-y any more... X)**

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* * *

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**Motive: something, as of a need or desire, that causes a person to act; an incentive**

Even before Ashi was quite awake, she was aware of the pain. It wasn't a stabbing hurt, but a leaden lethargy dragging at her limbs, and a dull ache permeated her body. It was a feeling that ought to have a very good explanation—the Iridian plague might do, but little short of that. _Where am I?_ she wondered dazedly, and, when no answer was forthcoming, _who am I?_ This time, it required a moment for an answer to surface._ I'm Ashi, _she thought, but then, _no, I'm Revan… wait… no…_

She cracked open one lead-heavy eyelid hesitantly. Light stung her eyes, making them tear up momentarily, but she blinked it away, forcing them both open again. She was curled in a ball, gazing at terra-cotta sandstone that came slowly into focus. Absently, she ran her tongue across her dry lips, swallowing hard. Her hand moved slowly to her face, brushing strands of hair aside, and then to the ground before her. Slowly and deliberately, she pushed herself off the ground.

Blood thumped loudly in her ears for a moment, and her head spun as she looked up. Bars cut vertical lines of shadow across the ground before her, and her eyes slowly rose to stare between the hand-worked metal. Two Rakata, looking half-nervous, met her gaze.

Ashi opened her mouth to speak, but her throat was sandpaper-dry, and the words caught in her mouth. She hunched over, convulsing painfully with coughs. The Rakata waited in silence, stalked gaze never wavering from her face.

Finally, taking a careful breath, she raised her head again. "What…" she said, and then hesitated. /Where am I?/

They both jumped as she spoke in their own tongue. After a moment, one replied uncertainly. /You have come back, Revan./

Ashi sighed. /That's not my name any more./

/It is what you used to call yourself/ he persisted.

/I've changed since I was last here/ Ashi told him. /I'm not the same person as I was then./

/Do you have the same purpose?/ demanded the second one, newly emboldened. /Do you seek the Star Forge again, Revan?/

Ashi slumped against a wall, still unwilling to try and stand. /Yes/ she admitted, staring up at the ceiling, /for a different reason. I assure you, I'm not the Revan you knew./

/You are our prisoner regardless/ declared the first Rakata imperiously. /The One will be interested in meeting you and your companions. The male, in particular. He will make an excellent bargaining tool to use against the masked ones./

At that, she looked to face them, disbelief flashing across her face. /Canderous?/ she echoed, incredulous. /You're using _Canderous_ to bargain with?/

/I assume this is his name, although is of small concern. They are of his kind/ said the Rakata dismissively. /If they hold him valuable, no harm will come to him. Besides, he knows none of it. He is not yet healed./

At the last sentence, Ashi's eyes widened fractionally, hands tensing against the stone. /He's not healed?/ she echoed. /But I am?/

/You were always strong, Revan/ the second Rakata explained, admiration seeping inadvertently into his words. He gestured to her arm, and Ashi saw for the first time the flurry of dart tips, still lodged, respectively, in her wrist and forearm. Refusing to wince in front of her captors, she yanked them out mercilessly, flicking them to the opposite side of the cell. Her newmade cuts stung as they touched open air. The Rakata continued, his face revealing nothing if he was at all perturbed.

/You possess healing far beyond the average for your species. You were less affected by our poison last time as well. Malak was strong also/ he allowed, apparently missing Ashi's jaw clench tighter at the name, /but it appears, Revan, that you have chosen weaker companions since your last visit to Lehon./

Ashi's head snapped up from her arm in an instant, and she stared at the Rakata with horror. /Are they all right?/ she hissed furiously.

/We believe the male will survive/ shrugged one. Ashi had lost track of which was which; they both looked very similar. /However, the youngling we are uncertain of. She is weaker than both of you, and the poison has proven to be fatal befo—/

He broke off, because Ashi was suddenly leaning on the wall, pulling herself to her unsteady feet. She propped herself against the sandstone, breathing heavily, and then took a couple steps forward, gaining confidence with each one. Her hand rose, a foot from the bars, and one Rakata flinched away.

It began as a whine, a grating noise half static and half imaginary. Her fist closed slowly around what seemed like only open air, moving incrementally to the side. Likewise, the bar—which none of their gazes ever left—began to twist sideways, wrenched by an invisible grip. The two guards watched in horror as it twisted, the shriek of metal rising in a crescendo, and then snapped away from the wall altogether, leaving a stalactite of metal jutting down from above, a twisted bar across the ground, and a crash ringing in the still air.

Ashi turned and stepped sideways between the bars, before straightening to meet the unfortunate Rakata's stares. Her eyes were as cold as tundra, and not half as forgiving.

/Take me to them/ she hissed. /_Now._/

They did.

* * *

Canderous was relatively easy to heal. Unfortunately, the same could not be said for calming him down. The fact that Ashi was there and not handcuffed, a fact she firmly pointed out to him, didn't seem to register in time to stop him shooting one of the Rakata in the arm. Despite her better intentions, Ashi couldn't muster much remorse.

What little sympathy she'd had vanished moments later, anyway, when they led her to Mission. The girl was frighteningly pale—powder blue at best—as she lay slumped against the floor of her cell, two darts in her shoulder. Her pulse was already feeble and sickly, even after Ashi yanked the darts from her shoulder, and for a moment Ashi almost couldn't touch the Force, fear freezing her fingers in place.

"Lucas?" Canderous said, uncertain, almost concerned but—being Canderous—not quite.

She nodded—"I'm _working_ on it, Ordo…" she found herself saying, deflection subtly tucked between the words—and concentrated on the girl. Poison pulsed through her body, webbed blackness below her skin, and Ashi took a deep breath, reaching out for the Force again. For Canderous and the Rakata, light danced across Mission's pale body like sun off water; for Ashi, it sparked through her veins, forcing the spreading black away. Either way, however, they both saw the girl start, and then gasp for breath.

She was all right—or, at least, insisted that was the case—but she was still weak, and Ashi felt absolutely no sympathy for the Rakata as they made their way through the settlement. Though Mission stood as tall as she could, she looked, in all honestly, pathetic. Meanwhile, Canderous kept a hand across his blaster, and send all the Rakatan guards who came near them scurrying from daggered glares. Ashi watched with wry amusement, rather glad she had brought him along.

There were, however, a lot of Rakatan guards to pass as they went. Sandstone halls gave way gradually to sandstone rooms, and then massive, ceilingless courtyards brushed gold under a high sun. Glittering pools of water flanked their narrow path as Ashi followed the guards. Slowly, in the distance, an even larger room began to appear—this one of white stone, and gleaming like snow under clear skies.

It was obvious that it was their destination, and Ashi struggled to remember what she would find there. Like dust motes, the remnants of this place floated disconnected in her mind—all she remembered was a massive room, and someone called the One…

It was as if the memories were weaving themselves back together as she went, as if she walked the same hallway in her mind, and with every step a hole stitched over. She did remember this place, familiarity thick and rich in the air; and yet only where she had already been this time was there, and wherever she hadn't was shady and vague.

A sudden, panicked thought occurred to her: for anywhere she had been before, any place she had known, would it come back to her like this? Her whole life, she was going to feel the world throw itself into sharper, reminiscent relief around her wherever she went. It wasn't disorienting, but nagging worries tugged at her mind: what of people, what of _events_, what of things that she didn't _want _to remember? Nightmares she could live with, but they had no place in her life when she was awake.

Except…

Except for once in her life—just once—she was willing to admit she hadn't given the Jedi enough credit. They reached the end of the hall, and the would-be guards collapsed immediately into sweeping bows. Ashi's gaze flicked over the cages ringing the room, each holding a rancor twice her height, and then raised her eyes to the sun-bathed figure on the throne, and…

_Nothing_.

Well, he was the One, but she suspected that was simple deduction and not a snip of memory. His eyes narrowed when she did not look away; beside her, Canderous stood equally tall, and Mission followed their example. With dark, imperious eyes, the figure on the throne surveyed them.

/Revan/ he said, finally tilting his head slightly in acknowledgement. /It is you./

She hesitated, uncertain as to whether it was safe to contradict him. /It is/ she said slowly, /although I'm afraid I am a different person now./

/Indeed./ It was hot; sun turned to liquid gold and trickled down the crown of her head, but there was ice in his eyes untouched by the warmth around him. /I hope this is not your way to try and escape our agreement, Revan./

The use of the name, innocuous or not, irritated her. /I'm not Revan any more/ she replied, forcibly calm. /And I'm not trying to escape an agreement, because I don't remember making one. I've lost a lot of my memories since we last met, and it's made me a different person./ She drew herself up taller, almost unconsciously, as she finished, /My name is Ashi now, and I would prefer to be called that./

/You are Revan/ he insisted. /This is your name. You are the same person, and you have the same name as you did before./

Barely two minutes, and this creature, supercilious as he was, was already grating on her nerves. Had he been this bad before, or had she simply not cared, being the same? /You can call me what you will/ she said with effort, /but I'm telling the truth. If you care about our agreement, then you'll have to remind me what it's about./

He blinked leisurely at her, looking ludicrously feline as he basked in the sun. /Very well/ he said, after a contemplative pause. Ashi had stood, defiant; now she relaxed slightly, listening in silence. /You desired entry to the temple/ he said, and it was clear from his tone that he most likely remembered every word from the years-old conversation. /We agreed to help you, and in return you promised us assistance. For generations, my tribe has striven to rule this planet. A single colony stands in our way, and you agreed to destroy them for us./

His eyes narrowed, fixing accusingly on her. /Two years, we have waited/ he said deliberately, /and still they survive, impeding us from our rightful place as rulers of this world. You, Revan, speak of galaxies and Star Forges, far beyond our planet, but my people neither know nor care about this. What we do know, Revan, is that you came from the skies, promising us our destinies, and you have not kept that promise./

Ashi crossed her arms, his utter disparagement too much for her. /And would you care to explain how was I supposed to keep a promise I knew nothing about?/

/You have made your point/ he said brusquely, plainly tired of hearing what he held to be a feeble excuse. /You are lucky, Revan, for we will absolve you./

_Space_, thought Ashi incredulously. The One was the first person she'd met who might have been able to equal the Jedi in holier-than-thou confidence. /However, if you desire our help again, Revan/ continued the Rakata, making no effort to hide the disdain in his tone, /you will fulfill your end of the bargain first this time./

/And that involves?/ she prompted, matching his contempt note for note. The One's eyes narrowed, and she wondered vaguely when the conversation had shifted into a standoff.

/We ask the same of you as we did before/ he declared. /The same colony stands in our path as before: the Elders. If you exterminate them, we will grant you access to the temple./

Ashi raised an eyebrow. /What does 'extermination' involve?/

/All of them must be destroyed/ he replied, with finality. /You had no qualms with it before./

_Possibly_, thought Ashi irritably_, because I didn't actually intend to do it._ But the truth, painful as it was, was that she probably wouldn't have any regrets about complying before—and if she had, it would only be because she wanted to manipulate the Elders as well as him. It wasn't the One, she realized, that bothered her; it was the fact that when they had last met, she had probably been just as superior and vindictive as him.

_Be that person now. Be the Revan he remembers—make him think you're on the same side. _/And I have no qualms with it now/ she lied calmly. /Where are they?/

He looked vaguely surprised, but it slid quickly from his face, replaced by approval. /Their settlement is beyond the temple, near the shore. You must know, if you do not remember—they have powers such as yours, Revan; the only reason we cannot eradicate them completely. Bear this in mind./

/My powers are unrivalled/ Ashi replied, a faint grin ghosting across her face. /Ask your guards, if you don't believe me./ She felt Canderous and Mission shooting her sideways glances, and found herself unsurprised. They might not speak Rakata, but arrogance translated easily into any language.

/Excellent/ announced the One, making no effort to hide his satisfaction. /Return to me when you have defeated them./ Ashi nodded, taking it as the last word, and was about to turn away. If she left when he dismissed her, she was his pawn; if she walked away, turning her back on him and his narcissistic throne, then she was the one in control. Nonetheless, his voice stopped her, echoing in the large chamber and catching her by surprise.

/However/ he said softly—something about his tone meant he didn't have to speak loudly—/you have betrayed us once already, Revan, and my people are not fools. You will return only when the Elders are destroyed, and you shall bring back the corpse of one of their Council as proof./

_Oh, damn_.

/Very well/ she replied, not bothering to turn. /You'll have your proof./ Trying to salvage the assurance she'd commanded a moment ago, she strode away, forcibly keeping herself from looking back. Behind her, she heard exactly two sets of footsteps falling in step, and felt a sliver of satisfaction that, at least, the other Rakata were too intimidated to even feign guarding her.

It wasn't until they turned at the end of the hall that Mission spoke. "Did… did that go well?" she asked uncertainly, and Ashi felt silently grateful for Canderous, who was at least intelligent enough _not_ to ask that question.

"No," she said bluntly. "I don't like him."

"And yet you're playing his errand dog?" challenged Canderous from behind her. She didn't need to be looking to hear the grin in his voice.

"No," she repeated, "I'm double-crossing him. It's called a _plan_, Ordo; those of us who don't instinctively tend to shoot our enemies like to make them sometimes."

"What does he want you to do?" Mission wondered.

"They're conquerors," Ashi explained wearily. "They've been taking over this planet for generations, right, but there's this one tribe left in their way. They can't beat them because this other tribe can use the Force, so they're hiring me to do it."

"Czerka and the Sand People all over again, huh?" she observed shrewdly, and Ashi gave a slight grin.

"Yeah, because that turned out so well for Czerka, right?"

"Nothing turns out well for Czerka when you're around," the girl stated proudly, following Ashi around a corner. "You're probably on their wanted list."

"Well, considering all the wanted lists I think I'm on, Mission," Ashi muttered, "that's not one I'm particularly concerned about."

The girl flushed slightly, mumbling a reply Ashi didn't catch. Glancing over, she felt slightly bad for the comment—Mission, after all, had been nothing but accepting—but didn't bother to take it back. The girl would work out quickly that she wasn't really angry.

As they drew closer to the entrance, they found themselves faced with increasingly large numbers of Rakata. Many of them spared curious glances for Mission, apparently unfamiliar with Twi'leks, and fearful glances for Canderous, apparently too familiar with Mandalorians; however, there was no doubt all the eyes quickly zeroed in on Ashi. Hushed murmurs began to erupt around her, a slowly building wave of noise that towered above her head. Mission didn't seem to notice—she was having enough trouble as it was trying to read the Rakatan expressions—but Canderous didn't miss it.

"They haven't forgotten you, have they?"

"They don't forget easily," replied Ashi grimly, although, when she looked back at him, she looked half-amused. "They don't like Mandalorians much either, though." When he raised his eyebrows slightly—all the interest he was ever likely to show, but a clear invitation to continue—she added, "They told me, before I healed you, that they'd wanted to use you to bargain with the 'masked ones'. I'm figured a deserter clan that got stuck here, or something."

Dark eagerness lit in his eyes. "Then I'll take care of them," he declared, with total finality. Ashi didn't bother to protest.

"I'm sure they're shaking in their boots already," she offered with a grin.

"Probably are," he muttered scornfully. "Spineless bastards."

She laughed aloud, drawing the disbelieving stares of a couple passing guards like metal to a magnet. Presumably last time she was here, she hadn't been quite so cheerful. "You're a ray of sunshine, Ordo, you know that?"

He snorted indifferently—several Rakata, huddled near a doorway, started as if the sound had been gunfire—and Ashi, knowing he couldn't see it, grinned. Turning the corner, she made her way quickly out of the settlement and back onto the diamond beach.

* * *

It was a long time later when she finally wrangled herself a free moment from the stubborn hands of Jolee. What had felt like being gone for a few hours had been a couple days, and everyone had been near frantic by the time she, Canderous, and a still-vaguely-pale Mission had returned. No one had been angry—though Dustil had been frantic about Mission, which Ashi found very funny—but it had still been a good day or so before she could get a moment to herself, and she took full advantage when she did.

She'd left Mission to inform everyone that she'd gone to scout out the planet, and taken off, only her lightsaber in hand. She needed the pure, solitary focus that fighting could give her, for all the qualms and hesitancy and frankly, _all_ her thoughts about the Star Forge to be briefly replaced by bruises and exhaustion.

It hadn't turned out the way she'd planned, she mused, as she sat gazing out over the water. Yes, she had left a fairly clear trail of destruction in her wake, consisting of, among other things, several rancor corpses and a broken obelisk, but she wasn't fighting any more. Down a slope and to her right, hunched on a hill like a peak of snow, was the temple; before her was a small cliff of twenty feet or so, plunging directly into a wave of foliage and then the glittering sea; above her the sky was a pristine, tropical blue, but she was positive that if she squinted hard enough she could make out the Star Forge, gleaming like a pearl at the bottom of a pool of water.

She sat with her legs stretched out in front of her, feet nearly at the cliff's edge. The grass under her hands was lush and velveteen, the luxurious kind that tempted her simply lie down and fall asleep. All that stopped her was the thought of catching hell from the rest of the crew if she didn't wake up quickly—which, honestly, she wasn't likely to do. Rancors aside, this place was as calm as… well, as calm as Dantooine, but in a good kind of way. Strangely enough, she liked Lehon itself.

And she _wished_ she could have just sat back and enjoyed it.

A light breeze, rich with salt and inaudibly crashing waves, stirred her hair across her shoulders. A new noise tinted it in lieu of the whisper of palm leaves: the soft muffled pad of footsteps on the lush grass. It was Carth approaching, she knew in a moment—long ago she'd learned to recognize his tread, and now she spared him only a vague glance over her shoulder. Maybe she might have looked for longer than a second, but the jacket was painfully bright in the sunlight, and she felt her eyes beginning to tear up.

"Hi," she said lightly, finding no incentive to start an argument in such a peaceful place.

"Hi," he echoed, and then, with a glance over his shoulder, "So we've abandoned subtlety, have we?"

It took her a moment to realize what he meant. She half-turned, and he gave a nod to the trail he'd evidently followed. The nearest landmark, a dead rancor, lay several yards away. When she got it, she allowed a small grin. "Space—you know you've got something to work on when Carth Onasi can track you, huh?"

She'd almost hesitated to make a joke at his expense, but he gave a good-natured smile. In retrospect, she ought to have taken it as a warning. "What are you doing?" he asked, not moving any closer, and again she found it unexpected. No comment on why she was here, or the fact that she should be back at the ship: just a question.

"I'm trying to remember what's in the temple," she explained. It came out uncertain—in truth, she was trying to remember just about everything relevant from Lehon, but didn't want to alienate him too much just yet. Her eyes darted to the side, assessing his reaction, but he kept his face carefully nonchalant. Ashi found herself impressed, and, even more reluctantly, slightly grateful. This wasn't like flying the ship together, where at least they were occupied. This kind of moment called for conversation, and he hadn't even managed to cram his foot in his mouth yet.

"Got anything?" he asked, before the silence could force its way in.

She paused, hand resting on her chin for pensive effect—and in reality wondering how truthful to be—before offering, "Dust."

He laughed, glancing back at the sprawling white building behind them. It did seem like the kind of place to have that in excess. When he turned back, however, he found her gaze fixed on him. A light frown creased her face: not angry, but puzzled.

"What do you want?" she asked. For all the connotation the words should have, she spoke them so innocuously that it made him cringe even more at what he had to say. He sighed—obviously she wasn't in the mood for skirting around the issue.

"We need to talk," he said.

Ashi hesitated. This time, the breeze ghosting over her shoulders was cold, sending a glissando chill rolling down her spine. There was a pause, and then she prompted, "Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Well, _talk_," she replied, sharply now. "I'm listening, but if you keep being this oblivious, that's going to change pretty quickly."

"All right," he said quickly. "Look, we need to talk about… Revan. And… us."

Ashi snorted. "Two topics or one?"

"All of this!" he snapped. "If you'll just _listen _to me, Ashi, then maybe we can."

"Fine," she shrugged, but she still wasn't looking at him any more. Her gaze was set firmly on the horizon, and he felt slightly wounded that she deemed him even worse to look at than the water. She straightened slightly, crossing her legs in front of her. "Talk away. What's the latest verdict?"

Carth took a deep breath. He deserved every ounce of her hostility now, for how long it had taken him to reach his conclusion, but it was still painful. Space, but really: all the time he'd taken even to approach her… all the time even to realize he couldn't _not_ do it eventually…

"I know I've been unfair to you," he said diplomatically. "I don't blame you for being angry with me. But I've been thinking—"

"That's new."

"I've been _thinking_," Carth continued pointedly, ignoring her, "about all this." He paused, running a tired hand through his hair before he spoke again. How could he say this, and make her know that he meant it? "Ashi, I thought I hated you," he said, and then flinched as the words came out, brutally honest and far worse than they'd sounded in his mind. "But now," he said quickly, "I just…"

He stopped. Ashi's low, slow inhale had cut him off. Her shoulder rose, tense and rigid, with the breath, reminding him of a cat arching his back before it pounced. "I…" he tried again.

She whipped back to face him, the tension exploding into an outburst. Her face was lit not, he realized, with hurt, but with anger. "Damn it," she growled, "just _stop_ it."

Carth blinked. "Stop what?" he asked, genuinely puzzled.

"Jerking me _around_!" she snapped, her fist tightening on the grass, and it tore away with the faintest rip of protest. "Changing your mind all the time! Just make a fracking choice and _live_ with it!" She broke off, and when she spoke again, it was pained and frustrated. "Look, if you care about me, Carth, then fracking _tell_ me. If not, then just leave me alone. Don't you think everything's complicated enough already without you screwing everything up even more?"

There was silence. He stared at her, wide-eyed and stunned-looking, a couple stray hairs flopping forward onto his face. A five-o-clock-shadow that looked about three days old shaded around his mouth. He looked exhausted, maybe even upset, but she felt no endearment—there was no room for it any more in the wake of this anger. She waited for him to speak, irritation growing as, while the silence stretched, her outburst seemed more and more melodramatic.

"Do you care about me?" he asked finally.

_How _stupid, she wondered, incredulity flooding electric through her nerves,_ can you possibly be?_ She stood up abruptly, walking over to him with an expression of vivid purpose on her face. His eyes widened—with an inward smirk, Ashi realized he expected a kiss as her proof—but instead she stabbed him in the chest with an accusing finger.

"You're an _idiot_," she hissed, and he reeled as if she'd shoved him. "What do you want, Carth? Should I start crying and confessing my love now? Would that work for you?"

He spluttered. "I—"

"_You_," she continued over him, the words almost not her own any more, "had to take a second to decide whether or not to shoot me a month ago. You don't sit there and ask me how much I love you. If you care about me, then you'd swallow your fracking dignity and _apologize_."

It was so good to shout at him, some shrewd inner certainty telling her he'd take the abuse. Maybe this was how he'd felt, flinging accusations at her in the cargo hold on the Leviathan. His eyes narrowed, angry now. _Good_, she thought fiercely—about time he grew a spine, even if it wasn't for a good reason.

"Fine—sorry?" he offered helplessly. "Is that what you want to hear?"

"No!" she snapped. "That's not an apology! If you're so _sorry_, then sound like it!"

He was silent. Inside, he was struggling, reaching, trying to come up with the right thing to say, but it slipped through his fingers, and he was increasingly aware she'd only throw it back in his face. He felt her eyes like knives against his skin: cold and viciously sharp, but only more dangerous if he dared move. With every passing second, Ashi's expression melted slowly from anger to mere disgust.

"That's what I thought," she muttered finally, turning away. She sat back down on the grass, and, after a moment, slumped onto her back, closing her eyes in a motion that couldn't have been more deliberate. _Go away, Carth. Now._

"Glad I didn't disappoint."

Despite herself, a wry laugh twisted from somewhere inside of her. "_Obtuse_," she declared, still not looking at him. "Or maybe _ironic_. Go look them up."

He didn't move, and after a moment she realized she'd been more serious than she had thought. "Seriously," she replied, the word sharper this time, cracking open one eye and them another to glare at him. "Just go, okay? Neither of us needs this right now."

"And I think we do," he persisted, neither moving closer nor stepping away.

"No," she corrected, "I think you need to go find someone else to be your verbal punching bag for a little while. _I _don't need this, okay?"

Suddenly, she hesitated, as if the words themselves were tentative—averse, above all, to the tangibility that being spoken aloud would give them. She sat up, pretense of nonchalance presumably abandoned, fingers tightening against the grass at her sides. "I already _know_," she murmured, "that you don't believe me." None of the bitterness had faded, but there was a deeper resignation in her voice that proved a strange juxtaposition. "I don't…"

She stopped, her voice trailing off. The silence was instantly too profound for her liking, and she sighed abruptly, standing up. She wasn't about to concede the point to him. He wouldn't leave? Fine—_she _would. "You know, I don't even give a frack," she announced loudly the air in front of her, starting away. "I give up. You can hate me, if you want, Carth; I don't even—"

"Stop!" he interrupted, hurrying after her. "Damn it, Ashi, _wait!_"

His fingers locked around her wrist. Her first instinct was to jerk her hand up sharply, twisting his arm in front of him, but she'd forgotten how strong he was, even though it clearly came with the military territory. He caught her halfway through the motion, freezing her hand in place. Had he been an attacker, he would have yanked it behind her back—at which point she would have kicked backwards, not really caring what she hit—but he didn't do anything but to hold her there, at least smart enough not to push her any further.

She jerked her wrist pointedly, but he held on. She spun impatiently to find the two of them now face to face. He was staring down at her, and… _damn_, she though unexpectedly. Gone was the diplomacy, the careful tact. He looked angry, exasperated, nearly furious, and she'd sort of forgotten how attractive he really was sometimes. She was breathing hard, and scowled at him, shivering inwardly when she found his eyes burning with frustration.

Not that she'd let him see that. It was easy to remember all the reasons she was angry with him. "Let me go," she deadpanned.

He shook his head. "Not," he replied, "until you hear me out."

"I _will_ hit you."

"Fine." He dropped her wrist, throwing up his hands. "Do it. Go on."

She hadn't expected that—and frankly, there was no way in hell she would have done it once he'd offered to _let_ her. She shoved him back instead, tapping the Force just enough to send him staggering for a couple steps. He stumbled, and she made to walk away, but she'd only gotten to the edge of the slope when he grabbed her shoulder. He spun her around, meeting her gaze head-on.

"I can't hate you," he said.

She froze. The words caught her off guard—more precisely, the utter honesty in them did. He hadn't tried to tell her how much he cared; he'd told her how much he'd wanted not to. The fact that it wasn't what she'd expected to hear made it suddenly seem worth listening to. "I tried," he continued without a trace of apology, eyes not leaving her face. "I wanted to hold you responsible for everything Revan did—for everything she took from me. I wanted to blame you for Telos, and for Morgana, and believe me," he added, with a snort, "I_ tried_, so I mean it when I say that I _can't."_

The recoil reflex came to her aid, stopping her from freezing entirely. "Yeah?" she challenged, lifting her chin. "And why's that?"

"I got the revenge I wanted when Saul died," he said simply. "I thought it would bring me peace, but it hasn't."

"_Peace,_" she scoffed, unable to help it. "We're about to decide the fate of the galaxy, and you're concerned because you don't feel _at peace_?"

"No," he corrected, "that's not what I mean. I'm not going to feel any more peaceful after that, either. All I can think of now is the promise I made to you before—the one that gave me a reason to look past revenge. I said that I'd protect you."

"And that did me a frack-load of good, didn't it?"

"Stop," he interrupted fiercely. "_Listen _to me, Ashi. I made that promise, and I haven't kept it. But the Star Forge is coming, all right? Whether we like it or not. You're going to kill Malak, and we're going to give them hell, but some of us might not make it."

"Don't _say _that," she hissed, her eyes beginning to sting. She'd never seen him like this before: it was like he had been with Saul, the same intensity, but of fire instead of ice. His hand had slipped to her upper arm, and he was squeezing it, almost painfully, as he spoke. Her protest was only half about the 'not making it' comment—the other half, though she wouldn't admit, was about her killing Malak—but he forged on nonetheless.

"No," he contradicted, "it's true. We might not make it out of that battle. But I want to survive, and I want you to survive. I want to give you a reason to."

"I thought all of you were my reason," she mocked, eyes flashing. Carth shook his head.

"A better one," he replied. "Ashi, it's not even the Star Forge. All this light side, dark side, inevitability—that's not going to work. Sooner or later, you're going to have to make a choice, and there's not going to be any second chances after that."

The words knocked her silent. Did he know how hard she'd been trying to earn her way to one of those, then? Was he telling her it was futile? Or just that she didn't have to? "You've got to make the right choice," he declared. "Not just for me, or any of us—not even for the galaxy. For you. Because…"

He took a deep breath, shoulders rising and falling. "Because I know," he said, his voice low and intense, "that whatever part of Revan is in you—whatever part of her _is_ you, even—it's _not_ who you are. You're not evil. You're better than she was, and the dark side… it'll destroy that part of you. You're _good_, Ashi, no matter what anyone says, and if you fall you'll lose that. And you don't deserve that. You don't want that."

He stopped—though she didn't know it, his voice had been dangerously close to breaking. He didn't remember the last time he'd been like this either: the last time he'd just spoken, and not tried to hold anything back, and damned the consequences. "_Please_," he finished softly, "don't want that."

"So…" she murmured, after a moment, "your reason…?"

"You've got this huge fracking destiny," he said—almost… nervous? _Oh, space_, she thought—"and I _know_ you think you can face it on your own, but that damn well doesn't mean you should have to. You gave me a future, after Saul, and I want to give you a future too. I think…"

He paused, stockpiling all his courage. Damn it, he'd forgotten how _hard_ it was to say this for the first time. Ashi was staring at him, face barely a foot away, her blue eyes wide and shockingly devoid of anger. She seemed almost as anxious as him for what he was about to say. "I think I could love you," he concluded, "if you give me the chance."

There was silence. Ashi blinked.

Perhaps _not_ the reaction he'd hoped for.

And then her eyes narrowed.

Even _less_ so.

"You _think_ you could love me?" she echoed, the words dripping sarcasm.

_Oh, frack_, thought Carth, who suddenly realized he'd said something very wrong, and was scrabbling for any clue as to what it might be. He'd thought, having never given a 'don't-turn-to-the-dark-side-because-I-care-about-you-too-much' speech, that he'd done a _damn _good job. "That's what I said," he offered uncertainly.

"You _think_ you could love me." Not a question this time, a statement. Ashi's mouth opened, jaw working a moment in search of words to express her indignity, and then she gave up. Dear space, and he'd been doing so _well_ up until _that_. What was 'well, I _think_, _potentially_, that there's some _possibility_ that _maybe_ I could love you' supposed to do for her? Frack, she'd have better luck trying to convert Malak and see if _he_ still cared about her than with _this_.

"That's _great_," she snapped, jerked her arm back and storming down the slope. Calf-length green grass swished in her wake as she brushed through it. "That's goddamn _fantastic_. Because that's going to do everything for me, knowing that there's a _chance_ with Carth Onasi if I'm a good little Jedi—"

"_What?_" he demanded. "What in hell did I say wrong?"

She was at the bottom of the hill, and turned to find him halfway down, arms flung in the air. "If you _loved_ me it might be nice to know," she retorted, glaring up into the sun at him, "but you _think_ you could love me? That's not even definitive! That's fracking _diplomacy_!"

She turned to walk off, skirting one of the many fallen obelisks that guarded the temple, when his voice stopped her. "And what do you even _know_ about being in love?" he demanded viciously. "When have_ you_ been in love, Ashi?"

That was a low blow, and for none of the reasons he thought. Though he didn't see it, she winced imperceptibly as if she'd been kicked in the stomach, face contorting for a moment. So many things she'd tried not to think about—all of a single person—poured through her mind, painfully caustic as acid.

"It's a Jedi rule," she replied with determined nonchalance, glancing back at him. Did he see that her gaze was unfocused, how hard she was trying to blink back the memories from her vision? "I broke all of them eventually, right?"

A moment too late it occurred to her that that wasn't actually a denial, but it didn't matter. "'Thou shalt not conspire to conquer the galaxy'?" he offered, raising an eyebrow.

"The whole 'you're better than Revan' thing lasted a while, didn't it?" she shot back, crossing her arms. "Clearly came from the heart, Carth. I'm impressed."

"I _tried_," he snapped. "All right, sister? At least I did that. How hard are you trying?"

"One," she listed, raising a finger. "_Sister_. That's fracking _incestuous_. Two, how hard am _I _trying? Do _you_ go around every day wondering if all of a sudden your mind's going to explode and you're going to be evil and you won't be able to control yourself and you'll hurt everyone you care about and you have to kill your best friend and… and…"

Ashi broke off. Too many words had exploded as if from behind a dam, surprising her as much as him. She was breathing hard, chest rising and falling, and there was a burning pain behind her eyes. Space, and of all the people she finally snapped in front of... it _would_ be Carth. That was just _perfect._

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. All the fight had gone out of him. He looked like a goddamn sunflower, standing there all yellow and brown in the middle of so much green. She slumped down onto the broken obelisk, staring sullenly at the ground in front of her.

"Yeah, well, I don't want pity."

"I'm still sorry," he replied, taking a few steps over to sit next to her. Still hunched over, she crossed her arms, wondering if body language could make her aversion to him any more obvious.

Apparently not. He took a seat next to her, not even putting the customary five feet of room between them. "I don't know what you're going through," he admitted. "And I can't even imagine. So if you're angry with me, or if I said the wrong thing, then I'm sorry. But Ashi, the point was that I don't hate you, all right? I know you're not evil. And I have faith in you to make the right choice. _That's_ what I had to say."

He'd expected her to accept it silently, perhaps with a small smile, and maybe he'd put a hand on her shoulder, and they'd sit there comfortably. Instead, she lifted her face to look at him him, giving him barely time to register the single streak of moisture running down her cheek. There was no small, grateful smile on her face, but she flung her arms suddenly around him, burying her face in her shoulder. For a moment, surprise made him rigid, but then he wrapped his arms around her instantly, drawing her closer to him. She wasn't crying, he didn't think, because he'd once seen her cry and her shoulders had shook then, but it was something deeper than that.

He reminded himself that this wasn't even in any way a response to his 'I think I could love you', no matter how much he wished it was, and hugged her back, knowing it was what she'd needed more than any profession of love. She'd wanted to be forgiven, and now she'd forgiven him too.

And for now, that could be enough.

* * *

Meanwhile, a pale-faced girl reopened yellow-gold eyes, and swallowed hard. "Master," she murmured, "I… it isn't working."

He stood at the window, gazing down at a small, blue moon beneath them. The light of the stars outlined him to her, casting a deep silhouette across the ground where she knelt.

"Why not?" he inquired softly. The words were like steam, hissing from an open vent.

"Her friends," the girl replied tentatively. "Even the pilot, Master—he's forgiven her. They're making her far stronger. And she's spoken with the One already. She won't be trapped on Lehon for much longer."

_The sooner the better_, thought the Sith part of him, and, _damn,_ a much smaller fragment. He shoved the latter aside. "Let her come," he said. "You will be here with me, apprentice. We will destroy this foolish Republic once and for all. And…"

He stopped, contemplative; still he did not turn from the window. "Continue to see if you can influence her," he said finally. "Any moment of weakness can be an advantage, Bastila. Do not forget that."

"Yes, Master," she murmured, hearing the implied dismissal and turning away. Her dark robes swished around her ankles, trailing with dusky authority behind her. The door leapt open before her light, even footsteps, and she hurried quickly through it. With dark hair, black robes, bone-white cheeks, her golden eyes were the only part of her left with color at all—unless, that was, she drew her new crimson lightsaber.

She had no intention of continuing to try and reach Ashi—not yet. Malak was a fool: advantages should not be repeatedly pressed so that they lost their effectiveness; they should be saved, used when your enemy was already weak. She'd made up her mind by now as to who the weak one was. Just because she had been looking up at him didn't mean she couldn't see. Pity for one's greatest enemy was too much. Malak was pathetic—he'd never even deserved to be a Sith, let alone their ruler.

She knew who deserved to be their ruler. Someone _gifted_, someone who the Jedi always expected such great things from. Someone who had left their sad little Order, chasing their rightful destiny and claiming it once and for all.

Actually, it almost sounded like Revan.

Bastila nearly laughed at the stray thought. It wasn't Revan she was talking about.

The Jedi had played her for a fool, hadn't they? What had it been: a lesson in humility, or something equally pointless, for them to send her to accompany the former Dark Lord? Was their only purpose to make feel insignificant, so that they could then offer her comfort in the form of more self-imposed restriction?

She'd felt so small, so helpless when she couldn't _save _Revan. Of course she couldn't. That had been the point. The Council had intended to treat her like a child—to force her, once and for all, to admit her weakness and give in to their will.

The Jedi had underestimated her. They had thought they could hide her own power from her. Now… well, soon the words 'dead wrong' would be extremely appropriate for all of them.

What had her mother said—_'you do what you have to do', _and_ 'you make me and your father proud'_, wasn't it? Because that was exactly what Bastila Shan was going to do. After all, it _was_, she mused, what she had to do; at least, it was what she had been born to do, and the two were practically one and the same.

She'd known she deserved this from the moment she discovered how powerful she really was. Power was given because it was your right. She would feign obedience, the submission that everyone had always expected—light and dark side alike—but when the time came, she would surpass them once and for all. Fools, that was all they were—fools who cried for power, and then turned around and let themselves be tied down. They were stupid enough to forfeit their strength for the sake of emotion (even Revan, still, with her pilot! Force, the _idiocy!_), and they were fools who, soon enough, would tremble before the newest Dark Lord.

_Love_, she thought, lip curling as she flashed back to a point she had argued a lifetime ago. _Oh, believe me, Revan—love is a weakness.

* * *

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**Dear God--I think Bastila is actually becoming one of my favorite characters O_O *douses head in cold water* Ahhh... only evil-her, though, don't worry. Reviews are always great... it's good to know you guys are all still with me ;)**

**--skrybble o_O**


	30. Repercussions

**Huge thank you for all the reviewers, who continually make me not give up entirely on Star Wars. Okay, I cannot tell a lie: partly a filler chapter, because they've got to happen. Relevant later, though. Anyway next is the temple... and next next is the Star Forge... oOoOoOoOo...**

**Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR...  
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* * *

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**Repercussions: the consequences arising as a result of earlier actions**

The Elder settlement was different from the One and his tribe's. Theirs had been large, encroaching across the beach like some kind of massive fungus, all weaponry and walls and high, arching ceilings. This one was more conservative: it sat curled against the edge of a cliff, feet from the ocean. The building lay low in the sand, small and blocky, but something about it made Ashi suspect that there was more to it than met the eye.

But, of course, the architecture wasn't what she was looking at right now. At this moment her gaze was trained on the door—or, rather, the air in front of it. A faint flicker of violet twitched in midair every so often: while it was rather impressive for such an isolated planet, it might as well have born neon signs blaring _TRAP_ for any off-worlders. Ashi eyed it skeptically. There seemed to be some kind of holo projector near it, similar to Kashyyyk's Star Map. Well, she mused, of course it was similar—Lehon's inhabitants were all that was left of the Builders.

"There's a force field, and a holo projector," she declared, for the benefit of the other two. Jolee harrumphed—_I'll have you know I've been scouting out security systems since before your parents even met_—but Juhani simply nodded. Whether or not she knew it was there already, she seemed incapable of anything but the sincerest respect towards Ashi.

"So… no hidden traps?" she prompted, mostly to the old man. "Nothing?"

Jolee shook his head. "I'm sure there's nothing, if your youthful little eyes can't spot them."

"Thanks for the faith," she replied, glancing back to find him looking suspiciously innocuous. "Really reassuring, Jolee."

"So…" interrupted Juhani in her soft, accented lilt, and they both started, turning to look at her. "We just… approach?" she asked uncertainly. "This is all?"

"We're not trying to make enemies out of them," explained Ashi, eyes flitting from the Cathar's face to the settlement across the beach. "They're generally peaceful. I don't think they'd be the first to attack."

She did remember that the Elder colony had been friendly the last time she'd visited. Of course, she had betrayed their utter trust—possibly not her shining moment—but Ashi was fairly certain they'd believe her that she'd changed.

The sand molded and rolled under her feet as she walked out across the beach. The entrance, thankfully, was tucked above the tide line, heralded by two columns rising from the beach like sentinels. The violet here-and-gone flicker of the force field was even more obvious from a distance, but far more conspicuous was the blue holo standing between the columns.

It turned towards her as she came, staring intently at the three of them. Though it was immediately clear that it was far less advanced than the one she'd seen on Kashyyyk—it moved in jerks, and little flashes of static rippled through it with faint hisses—its gaze was a thousand times more piercing, perhaps because of the likelihood that there was actually someone watching from behind the eyes. It waited calmly as she walked up to it, saying nothing until she had to break the silence.

"I'm—"

/—Revan/ it finished evenly. Its voice was clinical, matter-of-fact. /You have returned. What is your purpose?/

/I seek the Star Forge/ she replied, switching to Rakata out of courtesy. She would correct them on the name once they were on slightly better terms.

/Indeed./ The word was about as revealing as a mask, and Ashi wished she could have pulled any emotion—even hostility—out of it. These creatures were impossible to read—even the Rakata's gaze was eerily blank. /Very well. Enter, Revan./

It flickered once, and then vanished with a little crackle, the force field following suit. The holo had stood at the top of a stone path extending towards the entrance; now it was empty, waiting expectantly for her to pass along it. Ashi swallowed and strode forward, walking towards a door that, while clearly metal, looked to have been forged from several different _types_ of materials. It seemed the Elders hadn't done badly at all with what salvage they'd found.

It grated open—really _grated,_ with none of the smooth hiss of regular doors—and she passed through, hearing it grind shut after Jolee and Juhani. She saw only for the instant before it slammed closed, but a rapid, systematic glance around told her they stood in a blocky, low-ceilinged hall, with walls and floor of cool, slate-colored stone. Even though they'd only left the beach a moment ago, it felt like, out of the planet's irrepressible heat, they were suddenly underground.

Then the doors shut, and the darkness appeared. There were no lights—not even the smallest flicker of fire. Ashi blinked, once in surprise and then again in disbelief, but there was nothing to see. She was, in essence, blind.

/Revan./

Ashi gave a strangled yelp at the voice that had come from nowhere. She knew someone had just spoken, but her eyes showed nobody there to have made a sound. "Jolee?" she murmured from the corner of her mouth, loathe to break the silence.

After a moment, she heard a harrumph in response. "Did you hear that?" she asked.

"Yes," he said tersely. "And no, lass, I can't see either."

"Right." She raised a hand, waving it experimentally in front of her face. There was the faintest flicker of motion, maybe from light seeping through the stone's cracks, but nothing more. /Yes?/ she replied, glancing through the darkness. Suddenly, the tunnel seemed very intimidating.

Something stirred in the darkness, forming a charcoal outline, and then a vague figure, dome-headed and stalk-eyed. /Come, Revan/ said the Rakata. /The Council wishes to speak with you./

/Where are they?/ she asked, squinting at the figure. Damn—it must be nearly albino, if it lived down here. It also either had the advantage of night vision or echolocation, based on how confidently its footsteps padded over the stone.

/I will lead you there/ it replied brusquely. /Revan, my people are wary to have you here. Perhaps you can understand why./

The silence following afterwards was only broken by the soft noise of retreating footsteps. _Well_, thought Ashi, placing a hand on the wall for guidance, _least they're honest_. /Excuse me/ she called nervously, not sure how far it had gone. /My friends and I can't see./

The footsteps stopped, and there was an muffled exhale that might have been a huff of irritation. /I had forgotten/ it said, not quite repentant, /that your vision is different from that of our kind. Did we not show you before how to see as we do, Revan?/

/I've forgotten a lot since then/ replied Ashi, ignoring the silence that followed and bore a razor edge of skepticism. /This is part of what I need to tell the Council. If you could take me to them then I can explain./

/Indeed/ it replied warily. /Very well, Revan. As you wish./

There was a soft murmur, Rakatan words hissed under its breath, and then a glow filled the hall. The Rakata's face, guarded and stolid, was thrown into sharp relief, shadows flung back errantly from around its hands. There, between the fingers, shone a twisting, crackling light. Ashi took a couple instinctive steps closer, blinking hard, and Juhani followed with trepidation. Jolee, conversely, let out a long, low whistle.

"That," he declared, "is lightning. Did you remember them using that?"

"I thought they were peaceful," Ashi replied doubtfully, glancing back at him. The flickering light cast a long, skeletal shadow behind him, but his eyes, pale flat gray, were untouched.

Without bothering to try and decipher Basic, the Rakata set off down the hall. The three of them hurried after him, away from the darkness that crept back along the walls, eager to reclaim its territory.

/This power…/ she started uncertainly as she strode behind it. It was surprisingly fast, taller than her, and set an unrelenting pace. /The light…?/

/Yes?/ it prompted, already disinterested.

/It's a weapon/ she said hesitantly, /where I come from. Do your people use it as one?/

The Rakata didn't stop, but it took a deep breath, shaking its head slowly. On their stalks, its eyes bobbed dizzily. /You asked the same thing last time/ it observed, the tone of its voice bordering almost on accusation. /The power—your Force? Is that what you call it?—is a gift, and we treat it as one. It is a connection. We do not use it to destroy./ It sounded deceivingly calm as it continued, /You saw no problem with using as a weapon before, Revan. Has that changed as well?/

/Yes, it _has_/ snapped Ashi, perhaps more sharply than she'd intended. The Elders were different from the One and his tribe: maybe they weren't as outwardly hostile, but they seemed far less interested in her. The Rakata was utterly impassive as it led the way, as if she were nothing more than a triviality that it hadn't expected, but, regardless, didn't particularly care about.

They turned a corner sharply, and found themselves facing a large metal door, the same handcrafted make as their entrance. The Rakata lifted its free hand, letting the light in the other fade slightly, and moved it gently to the right. Before them, the door grated open, and Ashi gasped.

They were in a room so huge as to deny any kind of explanation. It extended seemingly forever, walls melting into darkness rather than ending. The Rakata stiffened for a moment at her intake of breath, but then continued in, striding down what, with the advance of light, grew to be a massive hall of sorts. /Revan/ he announced—loudly, but neither bitter nor deferential—/has arrived./

Ashi followed hesitantly. Swarms of Rakata stood around them, all gazing at Ashi and her friends with veiled curiosity. Helplessly, her eyes wandered upwards, towards a ceiling that fell and rose with crags of stalactites. It was almost like looking down on mountains, and for a moment she felt an inexplicable wave of vertigo. The room was ineffably large, but despite how massive it seemed already, she could see passages and halls honeycombing the walls. She'd been wrong to think that the building on the beach was all they had. It was an entrance—they lived underground.

She almost bit back a smile as another thought occurred to her. The One, it seemed, had his work cut out for him.

The Rakata leading them, unperturbed, continued on through an arching down at the end of the room. Ashi followed, glancing back in time to see the cavern fade into utter blackness. She was still squinting, trying to make out any light for the rest of the Elders to see with, when a new voice came from in front of her. Her eyes snapped forward, focusing on a tall, pale-skinned Rakata that stood at the end of a much smaller chamber, and was looking intently at her. /Revan/ it murmured. The one that had led her here now stood by, head bowed and light still dancing over the crowd of faces. /So you truly have returned./

Without quite thinking, Ashi bowed her head as well. There was no acrimony in the Rakata's voice, no accusation, and it was impossible to contain the rush of relief that darted through her. This, maybe, was a person that would listen.

/Yes/ she replied, raising her eyes, /but I've changed since you last knew me./

/Indeed./ It nodded. She looked it in the eyes; however, it didn't escape her notice that they seemed strangely blank when she met their gaze. Maybe it was the light. /How so?/ it prompted.

/My name is Ashi now/ she started, running her tongue across her lips as she searched for a way to explain. This was harder than talking to the One. /Ashi Lucas. Not long after I left Lehon, I lost my memories. Instead… instead I was given a new mind—that's why my name's changed—and it's changed me. I've had a chance to start over, and I'm different./

It nodded slowly, pensively. There was definitely something strange about its eyes—they were absorbed, trained directly on her, but all the same there was something unfocused about them. /But you answered to Revan/ it observed. /Do you remember this… past life, as it were?/

/In a way/ she admitted. /But it's not who I am now. I've gained a new perspective from my time as a new person. I'm not who I once was. I don't _want _to be that person./

She'd straightened as she spoke, whether she knew it or not. Her eyes reflected the lightning still burning in the Rakata's palm, and a worn, amused smile creased the corners of Jolee's lips. Whatever she was saying, she fully believed it—and, as he could guess at her topic well enough, that fact gave him great pleasure. He kept his eyes fixed on her, half-wishing he spoke Rakatan himself.

A silence followed her words that was layered with thought, each of the listeners carefully weighing what she had said. Ashi had almost begun to hope when, from behind the lead Elder, someone gave a snort. /Leyra/ said a Rakata—finding no translation, Ashi decided that must be the head Elder's name—/with all due respect, she was equally convincing before. Do we have true proof that Revan has changed at all?/

Leyra turned, glancing back at the speaker. /Ashi/ she corrected. /She wishes to be called Ashi./

Ashi felt a deep flood of gratitude bursting from somewhere insider her, and a half-smile began to light across her face. /Do you see/ continued Leyra, /her spirit?/ _Spirit_ wasn't the literal translation: the word she'd really used wasn't one Ashi recognized, and she suspected it was to do with their interpretation of the Force. /She was full of anger before, turmoil./ Leyra gestured vaguely at Ashi, raising a large, spindly hand and waving it in the air like an artist with a brush. /It is reconciled now. I do not believe she could fabricate that./

The speaker took a couple steps forward, eyes narrowing as he squinted at Ashi. She bit her lip, eyebrows rising in a mask of skepticism.

"Jolee?" she asked, her voice betraying her uncertainty. It seemed very loud in the suddenly silent room, but if the Rakata even noticed her speak, they didn't seem to care.

He cleared his throat in response. "Yes, lass?"

"Do you know what they're talking about?"

Jolee harrumphed, the noise carrying irreverently through the chamber. "I don't know what they're _saying_, lass."

"Oh." Ashi paused. "They're talking about…" she began, but then broke off, face twisting with irritation from her inability to paraphrase. "Spirits," she finished dubiously, "and me being full of turmoil before, and… colors?"

Jolee was silent for a moment, mulling it over. Ashi waited patiently—_she's learning_, he thought wryly. Finally, he offered, "Could they be talking about auras?"

He heard Ashi take a deep, slow breath, her shoulders rising with it and tensing as they did. "Oh," she breathed, barely a whisper. "Oh_, space._"

Jolee watched Juhani's teeth grit together with frustration, caught out of a loop she couldn't have understood anyway. There were disadvantages to being a Guardian. He didn't ask Ashi what, most likely, she'd just remembered, certain she was about to tell them anyway.

* * *

_/This… home of yours/ she wondered, twitching black-gloved fingers and letting the lightning in her palm flare a little higher. /How do you live here? How do you see?/ _

_She paused, wavering. /See, Revan? I do not understand./_

_/Tell where everything is. Make your way around. Your eyes/ she pressed, with a slight gesture towards her own. /Don't they have a purpose?/_

_Slowly, the Elder smiled. On a domed, warped head, the expression was twisted, and she felt the faintest hint of disgust for these ugly, naïve creatures. How could they be content here, privy to the knowledge of galaxies far beyond this tiny little tropical moon? Did they even understand the inconsequence of their miniscule war, compared to the battle she herself was fighting?_

_Of course they didn't. So much the better—manipulating innocents like this was entertaining. _

_/By see/ the Rakatan leader replied, /I assume you mean how we perceive the world around us./ Revan gave the faintest nod, and Leyra's smile grew by a couple inches. /You are familiar with… your Force? Yes? But my people have grown together with it. It shows us the world, not just its surface but what lies beneath. We sense the essence of life through connections to the universe around us./_

_As what the creature said sank in, she felt her lips part in amazement. /You see… with the Force?/_

_/As you like/ Leyra agreed. /I suppose this is how you would view it./ She paused, and then added, /You are… capable in your Force, Revan. If you like, we can show you how to see as we do…?/

* * *

_

"They're blind," she murmured. "That's how they live in the dark—they see with the Force instead. Auras and all." _I _can_ do that_, she realized belatedly, although she didn't add it out loud. So Force-vision wasn't a skill the Jedi taught, but neither was it one she'd learned on her own, after all.

Jolee raised his eyebrows, clearly impressed, and even Juhani looked like, while she didn't understand them, she could still be awed by the magnitude of whatever 'seeing with auras' was. Ashi turned back to Leyra, respect sparking faint but definite in her eyes.

/What were you saying about my aura?/ she asked. /What do you see in it?/

The Elder looked back at her, and in her face Ashi saw the same Rakata who, a couple years ago, had happily taught her how to see with the Force. Then Leyra had been cheerful and willing, eager to make a new ally. Now caution, likely the type beaten in by hardship, had worn lines into her face, but Ashi suspected that she could still make out a trace of the figure in her memory.

/You are… resolved/ she said thoughtfully. /Different—if not entirely peaceful… Ashi, then more so than before. Did you not have such a unique… vivacity to your aura, we might not have recognized you before. You are different—genuinely so, and not merely dissimilar, and thus it is my inclination to allow you a second chance./

/So you'll help me, then?/ she prompted, unable to keep the enthusiasm out of her voice.

Leyra held up a hand, clearly catching the rush of relief in her aura. /On one condition/ she clarified.

Ashi frowned. Much as she wanted to trust Leyra—at least she was moderately straightforward, if nothing else—there was something about the way she'd said it that made Ashi feel very apprehensive. /O-kay/ she replied. /What kind of condition?/

* * *

/Come _on_/ Ashi wheedled, turning back for possibly the third time in as many minutes. /We're nearly there./ There was a note of impatience in her voice: were she in a better mood, she might have tried to hide it, but it didn't seem worth the trouble any more.

/Patience!/ snapped a thin, reedy voice. She turned back to the top of the hill, and watched the crotchety, pale form of the Rakata slowly rise against the sky's background over the crest of the hill, like a diver entering the water in reverse. _And maybe in slow motion_, she couldn't help but add, considering how infuriatingly _sluggish_ the Elder was. She was ninety percent sure it was on purpose, too; the only thing that stopped her from erupting was the temple perched like a wedding cake, higher up on the island, and the Elder tribe's promise to get her inside.

/But then again/ mused the Elder, now shuffling down the hillside, /I suppose that patience has never been a virtue of yours, eh, Revan?/

/Ashi/ she reminded him wearily. /Ashi. Not Revan. Two syllables. It's not hard./

/Hah!/ the scout scoffed, and, clearly liking the sound of it, repeated, /Hah! What good does a new name do if the person hasn't changed?/

Ashi gritted her teeth, taking a deep breath through them. /I _have_ changed. Aura, remember?/

He snorted. /You could feign that if you wanted. After all, _you're_ the one who kept proclaiming how strong you were in the Force./

/I never said that/ she protested halfheartedly.

/_This_ time./

She shook her head, picking her way carefully down a slope half vivid green foliage and half loose shale. /How many rancors do I need to fight off for you to believe me? Because I really thought _four_ was pretty convincing./

/One of them bit me/ he grumbled under his breath.

/And I healed you./

/I didn't want your bad energy./

/It's not _bad_!/ she snapped, squinting into the sunlight as she looked back at him. /Leyra believes me! Aren't you supposed to respect her opinion?/

He paused, harrumphing and sounding eerily like Jolee as he hobbled around a patch of ferns. /This hill is too steep/ he said finally. /You should have picked a better path./

Ashi's closed her eyes, looking like holding back a retort was causing her physical pain. Jolee suppressed a grin—he didn't need to speak Rakatan to find the exchange ridiculously entertaining. "He wants me," she growled, for the benefit of her companions, "to find a _better fracking path_. Why doesn't he just go find another fracking _rescuer_ if I'm so _incompetent_…"

/Re—eh, Ashi?/

Her head snapped up at the side, and she hurriedly broke off mid-sentence. Behind her, both Jolee and Carth smothered grins that had been spreading across their faces. A Rakata stood there, looking out-of-place and distinctly pale against the sparkling sand. Ashi quickly jogged the last few feet down the hill, skidding to a halt as she reached the beach where he stood.

/Where's the scout?/ he inquired, glancing back up at the crotchety old Rakata. Currently, the One's previous captive seemed to be denouncing Ashi under his breath in Rakatan. She wondered vaguely why they would want him back.

/There he is/ she replied, not trusting herself to say anything more and have it come out civil. The Rakata turned, face widening in one of their slightly lopsided smiles as he caught sight of the scout.

/Father!/ he exclaimed, racing up to offer the older man a hand. /You're all right!/ His parent grumbled under his breath in agreement, and the guard turned to Ashi. /Leyra's going to be glad you came back. Forgive me, Ashi, but there were those/ he admitted tentatively, /who doubted you would make good on your word./

/Of course/ she nodded. It would have been stupid to hope for anything else. /So, what now?/

/I assume Leyra wants to speak with you/ he shrugged. /You wanted to get into the temple, didn't you?/

/Yeah/ she replied. /Yeah, that's great. Thanks./

He grinned. It was still slightly off, an expression evolution definitely hadn't accounted for, but there was enough sincerity behind it to pull it off. He was only a kid, really, by Rakata standards—thirty years old, so technically he was older than her, but only an adolescent to his people. He slipped an arm around his father's shoulders, taking what looked like the majority of the old man's weight, and began to help him down the hill.

Ashi followed him across the beach, Carth and Jolee in quick pursuit. The door opened immediately as they got there to reveal a few Rakata already waiting. The guard helped his father in first, passing him along to another Rakata, before motioning cheerfully to Ashi.

They followed him down the tunnel again, Carth looking increasingly nervous as they made their way underground. The young Rakata, who introduced himself as Nicul, easily conjured up a handful of lightning as the door closed, clearly having been forewarned about Ashi and her handicap of sight. Curious, she twitched her fingers too, trying to see how he did it. For a moment, the lightning flared up in her palm, and she saw Nicul tense in surprise, but she relaxed her hand slightly, and it too subsided into a small, warm glow in her fingers.

/Not bad/ said Nicul, glancing back at her, and she grinned. He stopped at the arched entrance to the Council's room, holding out a hand to stop Carth and Jolee in their tracks, before bowing exaggeratedly and motioning for her to continue.

/None of us are allowed in the council room/ he explained. /Just you, Ashi. But good luck, anyway./

She gave him a quick smile, hurrying into the next room. Leyra stood as she entered, and, to Ashi's surprise, the Elder bowed her head in respect.

/Ashi/ she said, /you return./

Thrown by the motion, Ashi nodded uncertainly. /Here I am/ she offered.

/We were unsure as to whether you would/ Leyra clarified. /But you have made good on your word: the One has been vanquished, and our scout returned safely. You have helped us, Ashi, and now we will help you./

First came the relief, followed quickly by fear—because the sooner she got in there, the sooner they'd be attacking the Star Forge once and for all, and the sooner she'd have to take Malak out of the picture—and subsiding into skepticism; she could hear an undertone in Leyra's voice that made her suspect that it wasn't that simple. /You'll get me into the temple?/ she clarified.

/Yes/ Leyra nodded. /Tomorrow, if you so desire./

But still, the nagging thought that Leyra wasn't telling her everything. /What's the catch?/

The Elder gave a half-rueful smile, as if she'd expected Ashi's doubt. /As perceptive as ever, Ashi. The 'catch', as you put it, is that when you enter the temple, it must be alone./

_Damn_. That was a catch, all right. /Alone?/ Ashi echoed. /As in…?/ It wasn't as if there were many available meanings, but somehow she still dared hope that Leyra meant something else.

The Rakata shook her head. /Alone. By yourself/ she replied firmly. /You may not bring your companions./

/But you let me bring Malak last time/ Ashi protested, certain of that fact. There were very specific memories of entering the temple with him at her side… and of finally disabling the Star Forge's shields… and, on top of the temple and surrounded by a glowing sunset, _celebrating_ their victory…

Biting down a shudder—after all, it would have been a complete non sequitur, and wasn't particularly one she wanted to explain—she focused on Leyra again. /My words, Ashi/ she declared, /were that you might enter the temple. You have helped us, and we will help you in return. I did not say that I trusted you./

The words came like a blow, a fist sinking into her stomach, and Ashi nearly flinched. She'd done all she could, hadn't she? What else could there be for her to prove?

A couple Rakata on the Council cringed imperceptibly for a moment, the rush of hurt clearly visible to them. One even offered the slightest grimace of sympathy, partnered with a helpless half-shrug. Leyra's eyes—bulbous and yes, _hideous_, thought Ashi viciously—never wavered from her, narrowed in consideration. /I apologize/ she said after a moment. /That was uncalled for. It is not my faith in you that falters, Ashi. But the temple and your Star Force are dark places. They are taints, and you fell to them once before. It requires great strength of mind to resist them, and whether or not you are able to, I am unsure of the strength of your companions./

Not even bothering to conceal the motion, Ashi turned and looked to the doorway, through which she knew stood Carth and Jolee. Her jaw set, eyes narrowing as she met Leyra's gaze again. /They're strong/ she said fiercely. /With all due respect, Leyra, you don't know them./

/And with all due respect/ the Rakata replied, /you are biased in their favor. We will only permit you entrance to the temple on your own./

Ashi opened her mouth to protest, but then she sighed. /All right/ she conceded wearily, biting her lip. /I'll go on my own. Did you say tomorrow?/

/Tomorrow/ Leyra agreed. /Come to the temple's entrance at sunrise, and we will help you enter./

Jolee, peering through the doorway, saw Ashi shoulders tense, visible strain drawing them tighter. For a moment he wondered if there was a fight coming after all, and almost reached for the Force as a precaution, but then he heard her speak through gritted teeth. /Thank you/ she said, with what sounded like Herculean effort, and he didn't need to understand her to guess what she'd just said. /I'll show myself out/ she continued, spinning on her heel and striding for the door. "Carth, Jolee," she called, "come on."

The abrupt switch to Basic jolted both of them, and neither responded. "Come _on_," repeated Ashi. "We're _going now_."

There was an undercurrent to her voice that both of them picked up on. Carth was first to fall in step behind her, with Jolee taking up the end. "What's wrong?" they both demanded in unison, the second they were out of the Rakatan honeycomb and into the tunnel leading to the beach.

She spun mid-step, suddenly walking backwards to look at them. "You know the temple? They're helping me get in."

Carth blinked and then frowned. "And?"

"_Me_," she repeated. "As in, _just _me."

Now they got it. "What?" demanded Carth. "But they can't—"

"No, see, that's the funny thing," she interrupted, cutting him off. "They can. They said the temple's all evil and you guys would fall. Then she told me I was biased." Clearly, from Ashi's tone, this was the greatest indignity of all.

Jolee snorted. "You are."

"Yeah, but that's because I trust you," Ashi protested. She switched her walk again, turning to look ahead of them again. "And they've got to know that making me do this on my own is a bad idea."

"_Oh_," Jolee drawled slowly from behind her, stretching out the word as he spoke it. "That's interesting." There was a tone to his voice that hinted at just how genuinely interesting he actually found it, loud enough for Ashi to pause.

"Don't say that."

"Say what?"

"_Interesting_. Like that. I feel like a lab rat," she muttered, glaring back at him. They were at the door now, and she held out an absent hand, tugging it open. The sunlight was painful as it flew at them, a burning white rectangle across the ground; she blinked hard, eyes tearing up as she stepped out onto the tundra of sand.

Behind her, Jolee frowned, the picture of innocence. "How did I say it?"

She glanced back at him, vaguely irritated. "Like, 'hmm… that's _very _interesting.' Like what you're really getting at is that you want to make me ask what you mean, so we can have a good long chat about why it's so interesting." She paused, and then summarized, "You sound like a shrink."

Both men considered making the wry comment that she could probably _use_ a good shrink some of the time, and both quickly thought better of it. "Well, if I _wanted _you to ask that," pointed out Jolee, "then I'd be well on my way to success, wouldn't I?"

She took a moment to think that over, but then turned back to him, throwing up her hands in surrender. "Fine. Do you want to tell me _why _it's interesting, Jolee?"

"Okay," she heard Carth mutter, seeing him shifting back from the corner of her eyes. "Okay, I think I'm just going to move out of the line of fire here."

"Quite a lot of the things you do can be interpreted as interesting, lass," persisted the old man calmly.

She shook her head, new irritation speeding her steps as she began to walk again. They turned a corner on the beach, automatically taking the simplest route back to the ship, and the Elders' settlement faded behind them, barred from view by a few blithely lopsided palms. "But that doesn't explain why you had to go '_oh_, that's _interesting'_," she pressed, kicking at a pebble and sending it skittering across the sand.

"I could have been making an idle remark. Or have you even considered the possibility that I was simply trying to provoke you?"

"It's the most likely scenario right now," Ashi answered readily. "But I'm sure that your motives are ultimately far deeper than that. Please, Dr. Bindo, give me some insights into my psyche."

"The ship," Carth continued under his breath. "You know, I think I'm going to the ship now, all right?" Finding no response, he took his own leave, shaking his head and sparing them one last worried glance as he went. Two things kept him going: (a), the suspicion that whatever was upsetting Ashi, Jolee was a better person to help her resolve this particular issue, and (b), the threat of some kind of verbal explosion coming soon, and the promise, if he remained, of a crossfire he really didn't want to be caught in. Instead, he continued hurriedly down the beach, fading quickly into a smudge of neon against the sand.

Jolee was unperturbed. "You're upset," he began thoughtfully.

"And it couldn't be that _someone_ is being cryptic…"

"No," the old man continued calmly, "it's not that. You're upset about us not being allowed into the temple." He paused, and then raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to tell me why you're so adverse to going in there on your own? It isn't like you haven't seen it already."

A moment ago, Ashi had been stalking off and letting him catch up, a sort of 'if you _must_' air permeating the space around her. Now she lifted her foot to take a step, hesitated, and placed it back down on the soft, pale sand. "For me and Malak," she said, looking back at the old man, "that was our biggest win, right? Finding the Star Forge. That was the last time we were… together."

Jolee grimaced and muttered something about hormones, prompting Ashi to go red. "Space, Jolee!" she snapped. "I meant, together as… allies, I guess. And I keep thinking that now everything's different, that he'd probably think it was really clever of him if he met me here… you know?"

Jolee's eyebrows furrowed together, grooves deepening in his lined face. "Poetic justice?"

Ashi grinned. "I'm not sure he knows what that means," she pointed out, and he smiled with her. "But… but if it was him, Jolee, then…"

She broke off, running a hand through her hair. "I didn't kill him," she murmured, the words coming out with a curious mix of defiance and shame. "On the Leviathan. I could have, and I didn't. And then he got Bastila. But he had a chance to kill me, and he didn't take it."

Her face contorted with a kind of desperate guilt as she spoke. "That means something," she whispered. "Right? It's _got_ to, Jolee."

The old man paused, thoughtful. "You love him, don't you?" he asked suddenly.

"_What_?" Ashi demanded. "Space, no! He tried to kill me, remember? _Twice_—"

"Not _that_ kind of love," Jolee clarified, cutting her off. Ashi stopped, waiting for him to explain himself, but instead he ambled slowly over to a driftwood log, bleached white by endless tropical sun. Sitting down heavily, he glanced over at her and raised an eyebrow, and after a moment Ashi joined him. "Friendship," he elaborated. "You care about him. And you don't think you can face him."

"Not alone," she finished. "I mean… with you guys there, I've got motivation, right? With just him, I don't think…"

"That you can kill him?"

"No," she corrected, gaze slipping to the sand at her feet. She scooped up a handful, letting it run like liquid gold through her fingers. "That either of us can kill the other."

"Ah," he murmured. "Then there's nothing else to be done, is there?"

"He won't change back," she said, "I don't think. He's way too screwed up for that."

"They probably said that about you."

"Fine," she conceded, rolling her eyes, "he won't change back with any method short of a mind wipe. But I don't think that would work for him. He… he'd find out, one way or another, and I don't think he'd be able to deal with it."

Jolee frowned out at the waves, contemplative. "But you managed."

"I was stronger," she said simply. "Mentally. He fell to the dark side; I just sort of… turned. It was my choice, I guess, but his weakness." She paused, glancing over to see if he seemed to be following. "That makes sense, right?"

He shrugged, one shoulder rising and slumping back under its own weight. "It was rather the impression I got," he allowed.

Ashi had been gazing out at the sky, thoughts wandering unbidden to the station drifting in its depths, and she blinked at his reply, momentarily lost. "I… what? When?"

"Your first time on Kashyyyk," he explained calmly. Met by a look of deep disbelief, he chuckled, admitting, "Lass, I'd been on that planet for a hell of a while before you showed up to drag me into this. I saw you and Malak. Two of you were impossible to miss—more Force in you than the entire Wookiee village… or Czerka, for that matter—put together. Simply didn't make much of it. Didn't know what a Star Map was then, just heard you chattering on about it." He gave a snort as he added, "Thought it was a quest from the Council you were on originally."

"Seriously?" Ashi demanded, eyes snapping to stare at him. "But… didn't we look all evil, though?"

"Oh, certainly. Auras red all over. But plenty of Jedi are disillusioned and still let themselves play puppets for the Council. I suppose they think it'll help them regain their faith, or something." He gave a faint snort at the thought.

"Regardless, Malak took care of that Council notion soon enough. You"—he turned to point at Ashi with a gnarled, purposeful finger—"you were clever. Sith didn't come as controlled as you most of the time, so I wasn't sure. Your companion, though—he'd fallen, pure and simple. Mad with his own power. Also, very rude. So, yes," he concluded with a faint smile, "I do see what you mean. You knew what you were. He'd lost sight of what he was a long time ago."

"Yeah," she nodded, a muted note of gratitude in her voice. It was pure luck that Jolee had been there, had seen her before, could listen to her without making the slightest sort of judgment, seeing as he'd done all his judging within the first five minutes of their meeting. "And even if he turned good, then if he had that to deal with…"

Her voice trailed off. "It works for some people," she said. "I'm lucky. But I wouldn't wish it on someone else." It seemed almost she was prompting him to ask _why?_, but without seeming disconcerted when he didn't, she clarified, "I still don't know if it's worth the finding out."

"Mmm," he agreed vaguely, leaning back against a whitewashed stub of a branch. The sounds of the island, taking advantage of the lack of conversation, quietly made themselves known: the susurrus of palm tree leaves, the _shush_ of the waves sucking at the sand, the raucous cries of a couple of sea birds. A gizka bounced past Ashi, pausing sporadically to scratch at one ear with a stumpy back leg. She smiled noncommittally at the creature and toed the sand by her feet, tapping her foot on the ground.

"Well," the old man offered finally, "if it's any comfort, I doubt Malak will be at the temple."

"Huh," she murmured. "And is there any particular reason for this certainty?"

"He's as afraid as you are," Jolee replied, sparing no effort for sympathy. "He'll want you to come to him. Gives him the illusion of power, no doubt."

Ashi squinted at the horizon, turning the insight slowly over in her mind. "Oddly enough," she mused, "that's reassuring."

Jolee grinned. "Then my work is done."

"Still don't want to go in the temple," she added under her breath.

"Can't help you there," he declared. "Nothing I can do."

That last part, of course, would turn out to be untrue. Jolee had lived a long life and, hence, told a lot of lies during its time. Not necessarily lies, he would object, looking back; untruths, perhaps, was more accurate. They weren't _lies_, just things that would turn out, in retrospect, not to be true. Sometimes for the worse—_of course I'd kill Namaya if she fell_—and some, funnily, for the better.

And that single unmoved, unapologetic response would turn out to be one of his biggest untruths of all.

* * *

**Foreshadowing: bonus points for implementing a literary device (which sounds more impressive than it is...) Reviews are great--always good to hear you're still with me X)**

**--skrybble o_O  
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	31. Crux

**So first, super-important, shoutouts to all the reviewers, especially new people, who've joined the party at a pretty good time. Cookies for all =^_^=**

**Now, for our feature presentation (brought to you IN SPITE OF looming finals, because I scoff at danger): the intensity promised is actually, genuinely HERE. Yeah, I'm as shocked as you. Enjoy...**

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**Crux: 1. a vital, decisive, or pivotal point; 2. something that torments by its puzzling nature; a perplexing difficulty**

When Ashi left for the temple, the world was a washed-out gray, the lingering dark voiding Lehon's usual vivid color scheme. With everything captured in monochrome, the sun still lurking reluctantly behind the treetops, the result was like walking through a photo negative. Ashi felt acutely alone as she made her way quietly off the Ebon Hawk, pacing quickly towards the path between the cliffs. The trees' shadows roamed like lonely ghosts across the ground, and she almost began to think how they looked like fingertips before catching herself. There wasn't anything to be gained by working herself up about this. It was just the dark. Nothing wrong with that.

She reached for her lightsaber, changed her mind just as she touched it, and instead let a burst of lightning flare in her cupped hands as she continued. It was getting easier to control now.

The temple: minutes away. Entrance to it, hours. The Star Forge…

Days?

No, probably hours too.

The lightning was pleasantly warm in her hands, but it was dark, and she still shivered.

* * *

It was distinctly brighter when Jolee and his rather unexpected accomplice made their way up towards the temple.

The old man had realized he simply couldn't _not_ follow Ashi instants after she'd left. He genuinely _had_ waited, debated, tried to persuade himself that she didn't need his help. The Rakata had explicitly said he wasn't welcome, he argued, but a nagging voice in the back of his head kept wondering how in space that made a difference.

Besides, for Force's sake, Ashi needed somebody. She'd looked terrible when she'd set off, petrified inside and out. Even if the Elders refused to let him in, he ought to go and see her. She'd have to feel slightly better for knowing someone had made the effort.

His companion, walking beside him, shot him a sideways glance, clearly an '_are we there yet?'_, and he rolled his eyes. It _certainly_ hadn't been his idea to invite Juhani. The Cathar had simply fallen in step with him as he went to get his lightsaber, offering no more of an explanation than, "Yes—I also wish to help Ashi," when he gave her a dubious glance.

Now, Jolee didn't doubt her for a moment. There was even a part of him that felt bad for the Jedi: Ashi and Onasi could be as reliably on-and-off as a broken lightbulb, but either the lass was being purposely obtuse, or she genuinely hadn't noticed Juhani's way of looking at her. He suspected it was the former—Ashi wasn't stupid, but she certainly wasn't one for inviting awkwardness either.

But no matter. What worried him was the fact that while he could resist the taint, and Ashi almost certainly would as well, Juhani wasn't half as stable. Force, the girl had fallen on _Dantooine_, where the single evilest thing was Kath hounds. His faith in her to cope in the temple, particularly with someone she cared about at risk, was shaky at best.

However, it wasn't in his character to try and dissuade the determined. Maybe Juhani would even prove useful.

He bit back a snort. A useful Jedi—that would be a first.

"Jolee?"

He started slightly at his name. "What?"

Juhani was frowning. "I believe I hear something."

He heard it too, a sort of rhythmic chanting from somewhere in front of them. It had a pulsing heartbeat to it, something with strands of the Force audibly woven through it, and the voices he could make out weren't speaking Basic. Put together, the two facts made him certain of what it was. "We're close," he said, pushing past a luridly green fern.

And so they were. Suddenly the temple rose before them, a goliath structure that seemed to be composed entirely of white stone and columns. The Rakata, auras blazing like bonfires, stood in a semi-circle around what was presumably the doorway. Their voices rose and fell, coming just short of melody, and the chant felt almost cacophonous, enough to make the hairs on both their necks stand up.

Off to the side—lounging on the ground against a fallen obelisk, drumming her fingers wearily on her leg—sat Ashi. She looked utterly bored of the sacred, if tune-deaf, spectacle before her, but brightened visibly when she saw the two of them.

"Hey, guys," she called, lifting a hand in a half-wave. "Miss me too much, or wha—"

/Ashi!/

They saw her head snap around, and followed her gaze to the Rakata. Their chorus was growing louder by the second, speeding into a life of its own, and the vaguely familar-looking Rakata who had called her name seemed unable to spare more than those two syllables. The runes framing the temple door, reflections of those on the obelisks, had begun to glow white, as if written into the stone in lightning. As they watched, the shimmering force field across the entrance began to flicker, revealing a dark, gaping doorway.

"Frack," Ashi muttered, jumping to her feet. She seemed to remember them only after taking a couple steps towards the temple. "Thanks for coming," she said hurriedly, eyes darting towards the door. "I'll be back by sunset, probably—not too much later—"

"We are coming with you," Juhani interrupted.

Jolee resisted the urge to smack his forehead. _Subtlety_, he thought wearily, _it's called subtlety_. Not even looking startled, Ashi seemed equally unimpressed. "No," she disagreed, "you're not. They won't let you."

"Then we'll let ourselves," he shrugged.

"They…" She stopped, shooting a harried look towards the Rakata and their ever-speeding, otherworldly harmony. "I can handle it," she declared, hand going instinctively to rest on her lightsaber.

"I'm not questioning your ability to handle it," he countered. "I'm offering my help, because I thought you might want it."

Maybe Ashi really had wanted help, or maybe she didn't have time to argue. Whatever the case, she seemed to deliberate for an instant before giving in. "So come on," she replied, turning, and they scrambled after her to the temple entrance.

The Rakata who had called her name caught sight of them, and Ashi recognized him as Nicul as he turned to face them. Immediately his head began to shake frantically, eyes whipping back and forth with their own momentum. She almost wondered how he could see for a moment, before remembering it wasn't something he needed his eyes for. /No!/ he yelped, staring at them. /Only you, Ashi! We agreed!/

She shook her head. /There's no time. I need them./

/No/ he agreed agitatedly, /there isn't any time for this! You're not allowed; Leyra said—/

She was about to snap at him when she became suddenly aware of the flickering panic in his eyes, perfectly clear despite their opacity. _Just a kid_, chided her thoughts, and she took a deep breath. /Nicul/ she said, more quietly, /the Star Forge. Leyra wants me to destroy it, doesn't she?/

He hesitated, before giving a nod. /I need my friends' help if I'm going to do that/ she continued, voice low but shot through with growing urgency. /They have to come, Nicul, please./

/I…/ he started, lips moving but no words emerging. /I…/

But two simultaneous things stopped him, the less dramatic of the pair being a great crackling of energy as the shield gave a final surge of protest. It was followed bare moments later by an invisible but tangible shudder that traveled like a shock wave through the Force and air around them. The hairs on the back of Ashi's neck stood up, and she convulsed inwardly, twisting away from the feeling. It was like hearing nails scraped down a chalkboard, too intense a sensation to process rationally. Nicul gasped aloud, and both his and Jolee's shoulders tensed in pain—however strong it seemed to her, Ashi realized, it was doubly so to the two of them. She hesitated, uncertain as to whether Nicul was even aware of her any more.

But he turned to face her, jaw gritted. /_Go_/ he hissed. /Go—do what you have to./

She needed no further encouragement, darting past him in an instant. There was an edge of resistance in the air, an energy closest described as electricity that offered the slightest friction as she raced forward. The temple, she realized, was guarded through the Force; the power dragging at her was the remainder of its shield. She shoved her way forward, slowing every moment. It was becoming more and more like trying to run through water.

It was a miracle that they got most of the way up the stairs before they heard a cry from behind them. Even the veritable tornado of activity in the Force wasn't enough to mask the fact that there were two extra auras shoving past the shields into the temple. One Rakata yelped in shock, and then another, and suddenly a couple dropped their hands either in surprise or defiance, letting go of the shields.

It was impossible to explain the sensation of air crystallizing around her. The interior of the temple was barely a yard away, but now hazed over from view by a half-present, shimmering resistance, and it was as if she were trapped in water that was freezing rapidly into ice. Pressure was beginning to squeeze at her from all sides, and there was a distinct current of energy running through the air. A spark of heat snaked across her cheek, slashing a bright red line, and Ashi yelped in pain, twisting sideways and forward in slow motion—

And then, quite suddenly, she was free. She tumbled into the open air with abrupt, startled momentum, nearly losing her balance. Behind her, Juhani burst through, landing with enviable grace. The air behind her was swimming with color now, and a low thrum of energy could be heard, and Jolee… _Jolee!_

Eyes flying open in realization, she turned and grabbed for the hand that broke, frantically, through the rapidly forming shield. It scrabbled for help as it breached the surface, but latched immediately onto hers with a grip like steel. Juhani caught on instantly, snatching hold of the wrist as well. With all the strength she could find, Ashi heaved Jolee forward, willing the Rakata to hold the shield for just a second more.

A moment later, Jolee broke the surface of the shield and went flying into them, sending Ashi and Juhani sprawling across the floor. Behind him, the violet flickered and solidified in front of them. Its dim glow and the even fainter sunlight filtering through it were the only light, and it was the best Ashi could do to make out the outlines of the door and her friends, picking themselves off the floor. She reached for where she hoped the wall was, using it to guide herself back to her feet.

"You all—?" she started, but Juhani beat her to it. "Jolee," she asked, accent thick and anxious, "are you all right?"

He harrumphed, and she pictured him rolling his eyes. "I've seen worse."

Ashi rolled her eyes. "I'm not _seeing_ anything," she threw in helpfully.

A blaze of blue light came in response. Ashi flinched away from Juhani's lightsaber, covering her eyes. "That's better," she muttered, "although this does work too."

She snapped her fingers, mostly for show, and a handful of lightning flared in her palm. Jolee didn't even blink, but Juhani looked satisfactorily impressed. Turning, shadows moving with her as she did, Ashi stared around the corner that widened into a corridor.

It was deserted, save two pairs of footprints left purposefully in the dust. One was thick and heavy-booted, the other light and graceful. All of them paused a moment, knowing there was no need to clarify who had left the traces. Solemnity descended like a stage curtain: the scramble for entrance and sun-drenched planet outside were gone, and all that was there was the temple's stifling dark. Suddenly, the musty air of the temple felt very cold.

At last Ashi raised her head, breaking the silence. "The shield control is on the top floor," she offered tentatively. "We should probably get going."

Juhani glanced up gratefully, nocturnal eyes flashing in the light. "Do you recall the way?"

"I…" Ashi stopped, eyes drawn helplessly to the footprints for the barest moment. "I think I can find it," she finally offered.

She started forward, lifting the lightning slightly higher as if to hide the footsteps scarring the floor. They were a clear reminder of everything to come, more so than any kind of fracked-up, intangible Fate, and none of them wanted to dwell on it. Chin held high, she set off down the hall, and if they all scuffed over the prints as they went—maybe even deliberately—then none of them mentioned it.

* * *

The temple had clearly not been built with the ease of visitors in mind. It was a dark, labyrinthine mess of rooms and corridors, its basic appearance from outside clearly nothing but a façade. Every turn was met with a fork, and every room, in some meandering and oblique way, led to another chamber that looked exactly the same. As the minutes dragged on, Ashi's lightning would invariably begin to fade with boredom.

That was becoming an increasing problem, as they were on the third floor now, and unanimously sick of the entire place. Ashi, quickly tiring of being the only source of light, had tried to teach the others how to control the lightning too. Jolee had picked it up easily, but Juhani seemed unable to grasp it—the one time she'd even created a spark, she'd panicked and flung it away, blowing up the floor in front of them. The circumnavigation to regain their route had taken at least fifteen minutes, and since then Juhani abandoned trying to imitate Ashi's trick. Still, Jolee joined Ashi on light duty, alternately taking the lead as, increasingly, her memories failed her.

They were just hesitating at a fork in the corridor, Jolee advocating fiercely for the left corridor and Juhani for the right. Ashi, previously, had jumped in to take sides—despite notoriously having little to no sense of direction—but in this instance she was quiet. Again, the lightning she held carefully had begun to fade, and Jolee only noticed as, unexpectedly, it winked out.

"Ashi?" he prompted, and then again, "Lass? The light?"

Ashi shook her head. Her eyes were fixed on the door behind them. "I think," she said slowly, "I see something."

"Me too," he agreed without missing a beat. "It's the hall we just came through. Even I haven't lost that much of my memory yet, thank you."

"No," she protested, glancing back. Shadows spun around her eyes, making them seem almost luminous in the dim light. "I think I see something, Jolee."

He sighed and closed his hand, cutting the lightning off sharply. Darkness swept around them in an instant, thick enough to cut with a knife down the corridors by which they stood.

But behind them, near the end of the hall they'd just left, a corner was traced with light, the barest gray outline. Even Ashi, first to see it as she had been, wasn't quite sure until she closed her eyes, grasping for the Force. The moment she reopened her eyes, though, there could be no doubting it. The inner temple was hazed over with a faint, ancient red—not half so strong as a Star Map, but with the same sense of antique timelessness about it. Despite the fact that the Star Forge, Maps, and temple alike were creations of the long-dead Builders, all seemed ageless, untouched by the passage of time around them.

Down the hall, however, strands of gold were bleeding through the red, diluting it into a warm, brilliant orange. This wasn't part of the temple. She blinked and then allowed a faint spark of lightning to gather in her hand. Her footsteps were rapid, spurred by a growing sort of claustrophobia, and she gave a cry of delight when she reached the corner. A stairway spiraled up in front of her, steps illuminated by a couple slanting rays of sunlight.

She abandoned the lightning, taking off up the stairs two at a time. Behind her, Juhani was just as eager, and even Jolee, though protesting out of habit, seemed glad to be out of the temple. He took the steps more slowly than the other two, and lost sight of Ashi around a corner. Still, however, her voice echoed down the stairwell to him.

"There's a console up here," she explained from somewhere above him, the light patter of her footsteps telling him she hadn't yet reached the top of the stairs. "It controls the Star Forge—we'll be able to use it to shut down the shield, and then we—"

Silence.

She'd broken off sharply, footsteps cutting off in an instant. Jolee stopped mid-step, waiting. "Ashi?"

No response.

There were a very select number of ways to effectively cut Ashi off mid-sentence. She could always have remembered something useful, and was pausing to pull the threads of memory together, but some deeper-rooted voice shook its head at the hopeful explanation. This wasn't a thoughtful pause.

He cast his eyes upward, Force-vision slipping easily over his sight. He was continually stunned at how many Jedi couldn't manage the skill—half the time, it was all that had kept him alive in the Shadowlands. By now, the impressions his companions left in the Force—the way they drew it like magnets, colored it with their presence—were as unique as fingerprints, and by now as familiar as their faces.

Given this, it was barely a moment until he made out Ashi's aura at the top of the stairs, and barely a moment after that until he knew something was wrong. Her aura, shimmering violet, had settled from a flare of color into a skeletal, motionless shawl, the equivalent of throwing water onto a bonfire. Gone was the excitement, the eagerness, pushed aside by shock.

For an instant, a flicker of gold caught alight in her chest—at that, he recoiled, knowing anything that frightened her was going to be bad, bad news—but then, even more suddenly, vanished in a new blaze of color. Red exploded, phoenix-like, through her figure, spiderwebbing fiery veins of scarlet through the purple. She wasn't frightened; for that matter, she wasn't even angry. She was furious.

And in a moment, he knew exactly what it was.

Ignoring the protest in his muscles, he broke into a run up the stairs. Above him, Juhani's aura—a fierce blue, flecked with indigo—had paled too, but she only seemed horrified. He raced up the final corner, bursting into the balmy, tropical sunlight.

Ashi stood ramrod-straight, fury written in her every feature. Across from them, an aura of a different type of red was making its way towards them.

* * *

Ashi hadn't known what to expected when she saw Bastila again. The creature standing on the other side of the temple roof couldn't be further from the Jedi princess she knew—not because of the chalk-white skin, or the eyes gleaming like flakes of gold, or even the red lightsaber she lit as she came to a stop. There was an arrogance to this new person Bastila had never had. Of course, as a Jedi, the girl had been self-righteous, but it had been born of faith in the Council. All her holier-than-thou-ness came from her clear knowledge of her own _goodness_.

This was a new arrogance. This was confidence that lent itself not to good posture but to a swagger. Perhaps before she'd had faith in her own devoutness, her own ultimate piety, but now she had faith in her power. She was no longer looking at Ashi as a mistake to be corrected, or with concern, or even with irritation—she was looking at her as a threat.

The irony—oh, and how much of it there was—struck Ashi like a blow. Here, this girl who'd saved her life and, in essence, made her good, and she'd gone and fracking fallen _herself_. Now _Bastila_ was the black-cloaked, smirking, confident one, and Ashi was the taken-aback light-side representative.

The ex-Jedi met Ashi's gaze.

And smirked.

And Ashi, very clearly, thought, _That's my job._

Not the black cape or gold eyes, any of that, but that confidence? Since when had _Bastila _been the cocky one? It was _fracked up_, was what it was, for _Ashi _to have become the Jedi. She hadn't expected the injustice of it, any more than the irony, but even less so the anger. She'd heard the expression 'seeing red' before, but this was new. Ashi had used to trust the Jedi brat—that was, maybe she hadn't _liked_ her for a while, but she'd certainly trusted her to do what she thought was right.

This was fracking _unbelievable. _She'd helped Bastila reconcile with her mom, and put up with her lectures for _months_, and had even been starting to like her against all her better intentions, and Bastila repaid her by trying to make her _kill herself?_

Her lightsaber hissed alive in her hand, and it took Ashi a moment to realize she'd drawn it herself. There was a genuine film of crimson over her vision, a haze rendering all else but the traitor in front of her irrelevant. Bastila, her once-friend, had been screwing with her head, making her unable to trust even herself. If not for the ex-Jedi, Ashi wouldn't be so lost for a direction, she wouldn't be so scared, she wouldn't have to spend her every fracking_ second_ doubting herself…

It was Bastila's fault, and suddenly, Ashi wanted nothing more than to make her pay.

Bastila's smirk widened.

"Hello, Revan."

The desire to wipe the grin off of her face was so overwhelming it made speech difficult, but making herself heard was something Ashi had never struggled with. "We've been over this before, Bastila," she found herself replying, almost mechanically. "_Ashi_. It's not hard."

Bastila chuckled wryly. "Are you still clinging to your illusion, _Revan_?" she wondered, now placing deliberate emphasis on the name. "Who would have thought that you, of all people, would have become a pawn of the Jedi again?"

They were words aimed carefully to hurt, pricks Ashi knew were meant to stir her to action. Strangely, though, a sudden clarity had slipped over her, and she felt the anger, too, becoming separate, just as her hands and lightsaber already had. Words were _her_ weapon, not Bastila's, and she'd be damned if the girl would take them too.

"As opposed to you, hmm?" she wondered, grinning back at Bastila. "Look how far you've come since I last saw you. Serving a new master and everything, right?"

Anger gleamed in the ex-Jedi's face for a moment, like turning a piece of glass and watching it catch the light, but it was gone just as quickly. "I have broken free of the Jedi and their restrictions," she replied. "They had been using me, Revan, just like they once tried to use you. I do not serve—I _control_."

"Heh. Yeah. Control," Ashi echoed, rolling the words around in her mouth as she spoke. "Is that what you call it when you kneel in front of Malak?"

This time, the flicker of emotion was longer, a fault-line crack marring Bastila's face for a moment. Ashi pressed on, delving into the chink she'd sensed. "Look at you," she continued, "running errands for him instead of the Jedi. Your mother must be so proud."

But it was an age-old rule that bringing up mothers was the last straw, and one that seemingly applied to Sith as well. Bastila snarled, eyes narrowing to feline slits, and snapped a half-clenched hand into the air. Ashi, with no warning, was jerked off the ground, invisible fingers clenched around her windpipe. Her hands flew to her neck, and her lightsaber clattered to the ground, flickering off and rolling a few feet away. Behind her, Ashi heard the familiar strangled cry, and a flash of purple confirmed what she'd suspected—both Juhani and Jolee were frozen as well.

"Do you know," Bastila hissed, stalking a step closer, "what my mother said, Revan? She told me to do what I _had_ to do. I _had_ to accept my true power, to take control of my fate myself. What kind of life is it to live," she pressed, staring up at Ashi through glowing eyes, "a life of oppression under fools who know nothing of true power? They wanted me to bow," she sneered, "and call them '_master_', to obey their Code and follow their every order, and yet all the while they held me back from all I could be! They would use my talent to fight their wars, but in the end I was just a child to them—an _inferior_."

Despite every instinct, Ashi forced her hands away from her throat, unwilling to give Bastila the satisfaction of seeing her struggle. "And you don't think…" she offered, the words strangled but deliberate, "they treated you like a kid… because you're _acting_ like one?"

Growling in fury, Bastila threw out her hands, first to the side and then straight out towards Ashi. Jolee and Juhani skidded to either side like chess pieces, shifted by some massive hand, and Ashi went flying back towards the columns near the top of the stairs. There was genuine force behind the blow, enough to shatter Ashi's skull whether Bastila had meant to or not, and Ashi realized it barely in time. At her sides, she splayed her fingers, and a shield spiderwebbed through the air, catching her before she hit the stone.

Just because it wasn't the pillar she hit, of course, didn't mean it didn't hurt. Her back connected first with the shield, and she felt something splinter in her chest, ribs shattering against the barrier. Then her head whiplashed back, snapping against the blue film—which might be made of energy, but certainly felt as solid as a rock—and stars exploded behind her eyes, blinding her.

She crumpled to the ground like a worn flyer torn from a wall. Foggily, she'd intended to get her hands and knees under her, but it didn't quite work, the limbs giving beneath her as she hit the ground. Her chin bounced against the stone, and she tasted blood in her mouth a moment later, coppery and metallic.

Footsteps, even and measured, came closer, and a moment later a shadow blocked the sunlight falling across her face. "Am I such a child now, Revan?" wondered Bastila from above her. "Is this a _child's_ power? Have you grown so weak a _child_ could destroy you?"

Ashi's ribs, shattered like pottery, were digging into her chest, and simply breathing stabbed at her from the inside. She could feel the organs ripping on bone, already hemorrhaging inside her chest. It hurt not even so much to breathe as to _exist_. "Wasn't," she began, and then convulsed, a cough that seemed to shred her lungs like paper wracking her body. Blood speckled the ground in front of her.

"Wasn't what… I meant," she repeated, forcing the words through gritted teeth. "_Kids_… don't know when… they're being… _lied to_."

The hesitation she heard—heard, not saw, for she couldn't find the strength to look up—was instantaneous, but Bastila still seemed to find the need to compensate for it. "Lies?" she snapped. "_Lies?_ You, Revan, spending every moment pretending to be a persona the Jedi Council forged, and you speak to me of lies?"

Ashi was still, unable to move. The words, only what she should have expected, cut more deeply than she could let Bastila know. But soon it wouldn't matter—Bastila's voice was drifting further away… or maybe it was Ashi who was sinking…?

"Malak told me to come here," continued the Sith. "Do you know his orders for me, Revan?" She didn't wait for an answer, anticipating Ashi's lack of response. "He told me to kill you." Suddenly her tone was humorous, sickly conspiratorial. "Well. _I_ didn't think I would," Bastila declared, almost a confession. "I believed that you'd be stronger than that, Revan. I had a _plan_.

"Malak is weak—he lets emotion control him. I came her seeking a new master, one who had proven themselves before. I thought I could lead you back to where you belong, Revan. The second coming of the _true_ Dark Lord… rather poetic, it seemed.

"But _you._" There was no humor now. The disgust in Bastila's voice scalded like acid. "You are _pathetic_. You cling to your Jedi, your _redemption_, and what good has it done you? You lie here at my feet, Revan—the greatest Sith the galaxy has known, reduced to _this_!

"So," she concluded softly, "I suppose I know which master I will have to chose. A shame."

A pulse of heat hung over Ashi, singeing between her shoulder blades. It was a lightsaber, she knew, and could easily guess at its purpose. Protest flooded through her, and she tried to roll out of the way, but something akin to lightning rippled through her chest. She screamed abruptly at the pain, gasping in a shuddering breath.

"And so ends," finished Bastila, "the Sith Lord Revan—"

"_NO!_"

A snarling cry, more animal than human, exploded from Ashi's right. Bastila whirled, lightsaber grazing Ashi as she blocked her attacker. Ashi lay still, the memory of the pain making her loath to move and risk it again.

"Mutt!" she heard Bastila shriek. "Filthy slave—to the—Jedi!" Buzzes of static interspersed the sentence—there was a fight happening, and a serious one.

"_You_," growled a fearsome voice, "_will not touch Ashi!_" The growling undertone and accent rendered the words almost unintelligible, but left no doubt as to who it was.

Suddenly, a pair of hands pressed against her back, thick but startlingly gentle. "This may hurt a bit, lass," she heard someone murmur calmly, and then the hands pressed harder.

There was a coherent part of her that recognized Jolee and accepted he wouldn't hurt her, but that part was swept away in the pain. She felt her broken bones liquefying and reforming in her chest, wounds stitching over and blood retreating into veins. Her back spasmed, spine stretched taut for a moment, and then she slumped against the ground, taking a deep, wonderful breath. A dull ache extended from the top of her stomach up through her collarbone, but it was so much better by comparison that she barely felt it. She heaved herself up, stopping hunched over when a choking wave of dizziness hit her.

"Careful," Jolee reproached. "Healing won't do anything if you go getting yourself flung around some more."

Ashi ignored him, raising her head with Herculean effort to stare at Juhani and Bastila. It was a fierce battle, one where Ashi certainly didn't envy either of them. Bastila seemed unable to find a moment to grasp the Force, she was so occupied by Juhani's fighting, but the Cathar's intensity couldn't be easy to sustain.

"The dark side—will destroy you—Bastila!" she heard Juhani grunt, spinning away from a blow.

"You know _nothing_ of the dark side!" hissed the ex-Jedi, lightsaber a blaze of gold as she frantically blocked Juhani. "When you tasted it you ran and hid like an animal! You disgust me!"

"It makes me wiser," Juhani breathed. "I knew—to try and escape it. You—you want this, Bastila—and that—makes you _weak_!"

She'd pushed her too far. Ashi saw the change in Bastila's stance, and then the girl threw out her hands with a cry of rage. A wave of energy, a visible ripple in the air, knocked Juhani off her feet, not even grabbing at her but simply catching her in its wake. The Cathar went flying into a column, and an instant later the wave of energy caught up to her.

Everything seemed suddenly to happen very slowly. The columns framing the rooftop had stood for millennia, slowly but surely growing weak with age. There was no other way to describe it but that the marble exploded, shattering like glass at the impact. Chunks began to fall, cracking against the ground with explosive noise, and then the floor spiderwebbed with fissures and began to crumble under Juhani, just as she struggled to her feet…

A stream of blood was weaving like a ribbon down her face. They saw her eyes widen in horror as the rock under her dissolved, sweeping her into an avalanche. She tried to grab for a handhold, but there was none to be found. For a moment she teetered on the edge, arms pinwheeling for a lifeline, and then she was gone.

The sun, low in the sky, was glowing red behind Bastila, painting a sheen of gold across the scene. Around them, the pillars stood like sentinels, casting long, blue silhouettes across the marble ground. The stone under Ashi's feet was patterned with light, dyed alternately dark with shadow and gold with sunlight. Far away, she could hear the rustling of wind in trees, a susurrus of noise from outside the force field; even farther, the waves were breaking along the shore, and Ashi imagined she could almost hear the murmur of the ocean against the sand.

In an instant she was suddenly, violently aware of it all, and of how pure in comparison this small, unknowing island was. It was gorgeous, and that beauty in itself so startlingly incongruent. How could something so ugly as this be taking place in so beautiful a world?

But it was. Three floors below them in the temple that had taken them hours to navigate, and Juhani had bypassed them in barely seconds.

And she had been protecting Ashi.

Ashi felt the denial crumbling, almost tangible, into rage. Bastila had killed one of her fellow Jedi: there could be no going back from this point. The person in front of her deserved no mercy. What she _deserved_ was everything Ashi could throw at her and more—she wasn't Bastila any more.

Except…

The bond!

This time, however, Ashi had no intention of using it as a peacemaking tool. Jolee was on his feet, drawing his lightsaber—if anything, that frightened Ashi more, for he wasn't half the fighter Juhani was—as she scrambled within her mind for the bond. It had been shoved away, buried under landslides of events, memories, emotions, but she latched onto it, tearing it open like ripping off a scab.

Jolee was advancing on a shocked-looking Bastila…

Ashi reached in, forcing her essence into Bastila's mind. She didn't care if the girl noticed—so much the better. She grabbed at the insides of the mind—anywhere she could get a handhold, so to speak, for the mind was nearly tangible in a metaphysical way—and _tore_.

Bastila's scream rent the air, half-jerking her back to herself. The girl was even paler, bent almost double with her head in her hands. Ashi almost felt guilty until the broken corner of the temple caught her eye, and then it was gone as quickly as it had come. She tore through the bond again, clawing at anything she could reach. Bastila's breath, somewhere far away, was coming in short fast jerks. The ex-Jedi cried out in anguish, flinging out her arms, and a wave of energy shoved Jolee away. He hit the ground and went slack as his head hit the stone, leaving behind a smear of red.

His cut-off cry snapped Ashi back to in time to see Bastila staggering towards her, lightsaber held up but eyes unfocused. A tear was running down the ex-Jedi's cheek, painting a flashing line of silver along her face. Ashi scrambled back as a surprisingly fast swipe came swinging at her, and called her lightsaber to her hand with a twitch of her fingers.

"That was low," Bastila hissed as Ashi leapt to her feet. "You're more… creative than I'd expected."

There were no words for Ashi to try and use. She called her lightsaber to her hands in instants and charged at Bastila, swinging towards her with strength previously untapped. The ex-Jedi barely had time to block the blow, and even as she met Ashi's blade with her own, her hands were shaking with the effort. Meanwhile, Ashi ducked, spinning and slashing, everything slowing down until it took on crystal clarity. Bastila's defense was patches of safety strung together by quick-growing desperation, and crumbling like sand.

It was like facing Malak had been, the Leviathan all over again. Everything was moving too quickly, and she knew there would be hell to pay when she stopped to process it all, but here was a friend turned enemy who she wanted nothing more than to see at her feet.

Bastila's face was slipping from anger to fear. She'd counted, Ashi realized, on fighting someone feeling sentimental, someone who didn't want to hurt her.

She hadn't accounted for this.

So she _certainly_ hadn't accounted for a blow from Ashi that came from the side out of nowhere, nor the way she'd lost her grip on her blade for the barest instant, and least of all for her weapon to go clattering to the ground, spinning in a firework of scarlet across the marble ground. She reached out for it, but Ashi was faster, stopping the blade with a foot and kicking it effortlessly away.

The bond was gaping now, a gash torn back open by bare hands, mingling into an estuary of sensation. Their two minds were bleeding together, all sharp, raw emotion, and Ashi couldn't even distinguish her own senses from Bastila's. Whose fear was it stinging her nerves, whose disbelief; who was on the ground, staring up, and whose victory was it as they stood above, ready to end the other?

"You…" Bastila whispered, running a tongue across dry lips. Ashi heard her test the words in her mind, felt her swallow as she forced them out. "You're stronger."

…_Than I thought? Than me?_ It was both Bastila meant to convey, and Ashi knew it. The words tasted strange in Bastila's mouth—they came out shocked more than anything, begging to be followed by, "_How?_"

Normally Ashi would have a comeback waiting, something cocky about having had a little more practice or _yeah, Bastila, I definitely see the improvement_, but something had changed. Bastila, on hands and knees on the sacred marble, met Revan's eyes—expecting, despite all else, to find a friend looking back—but there was nothing. The ex-Dark Lord might as well have been wearing her mask again, impossible as it was to read her face. In the back of her mind, the bond only confirmed what Bastila had already known. Into Ashi's mind poured the vast emotion of a girl who'd spent her life holding back feelings, but all Bastila sensed from her bond-mate was a cold, icy sense of purpose. There was no mercy left from Revan.

How could it be? The Jedi had lied to her, but the Sith had promised her power beyond her wildest dreams, and yet she was about to die for the natural choice she'd made. But… but it made no _sense!_ Everything had seemed so perfect when Malak had been telling her about the dark side…

But nothing was perfect now. The raw, primal chaos of fear was racing through her, her breath coming in gasps. Her usually pristine hair was slipping from its pigtails, dark strands whipping across her face in the wind, and she couldn't breathe right, and she _didn't want to die_.

"You're stronger," she repeated.

One eyebrow raised fractionally above blazing blue eyes. "I know," Revan replied.

"Malak doesn't deserve it," Bastila whispered, the words shaking half from fear and half with the intensity of her respect. "Malak isn't the Sith Lord, Revan, you are, you always were—"

Revan's eyes sparked, her jaw clenching. "Is that supposed to mean anything to me?"

"_Revan._" Bastila took a deep breath, forcing herself still with a surge of willpower. "Take back your place. No one deserves it more than you. You could lead us all—create the galaxy again, better this time! You were born for this!"

_NO_, shrieked an inner voice of hers, _no, _I'm _born for it_, but Bastila spoke through it. She needed them to be partners now, if only so Revan wouldn't kill her. "Take back what was _yours_," she pressed, "what still is yours! You want to help everyone, Revan, then take control yourself, and show them the way!"

Revan paused, staring down at her almost as if she didn't know what to make of the girl at her feet. Bastila waited, holding her breath, and then, to her surprise, Revan smiled.

"You want me to come back to the dark side?"

Bastila, wary of a trick question, hesitated, before giving a tentative nod.

"Because it's meant to be?"

Uncertainly, she nodded again.

Revan laughed. _Laughed_. The sound cut Bastila to the bone. "Do you know what you just _did_?" wondered the ex-Dark Lord. "Do you _see_ that?" She waved a hand towards the broken edge of stone, the place Juhani had fallen, and Bastila felt herself stiffen ever so slightly. The image of the Jedi slipping, suspended in the air for just a moment…

"That's the dark side," Revan hissed, eyes never leaving Bastila's face. "Remember, Bastila? Way back when she was your friend? Because you just killed her."

_But she would have killed me! But she was stupid, she didn't understand; I wouldn't have done it if she'd just accepted my_ choice_!_ "And where did I learn that?" Bastila demanded, tilted her chin up. She barely registered that the quiver had all but gone from her voice. "Who taught me that? Who gave me my first taste of the dark side?"

Suddenly her mouth was moving on its own, without any caution in the words. "I learned from the _master_," Bastila snapped. "You have no right to stand there and lecture me—the dark side is just as much part of you as it is me, no matter how much you want to pretend it isn't. It was in _you_ that I first found darkness, Revan: I tasted it in your mind, felt in it you every day, fought it and struggled to escape it and then realized there's no point in trying to escape what _is_ your escape."

_An escape_, Ashi thought numbly. Bastila didn't offer power, strength, control—she offered freedom, the right to choose for herself again. How long since Ashi had had that? _Before Taris_, she'd respond reflexively, but then it occurred to her that everything before Taris wasn't real… that, as Ashi Lucas, she'd _never_ known real freedom of choice.

"That?" Bastila tossed a scornful, fierce glare to the broken rooftop corner. "That wasn't the dark side, Revan. The dark side is the freedom of choice and from convention. Do you think you can go back to the light side again? Who will accept you there? The Sith are the only truly tolerant ones, the only ones who want you."

"Ah, they _want_ me. Of course. Until one of them runs a lightsaber through my back, right?"

But it was a feeble comeback, and Bastila sensed it. "You'd prefer 'until the Republic arrests you'?" she challenged. "Or 'until the Jedi take apart your mind to hide your life from you'? Are those truly better, Revan? If you choose the light side, you condemn yourself to chains. If you choose the dark side, you choose free will—it is merely up to you to sustain it."

Ashi shook her head—the purpose was fading, eroding away under Bastila's tirade. "Stop," she choked, taking a step back.

However, far from stopping, Bastila drew herself up to her feet, preparing for a final blow they both felt coming. She threw out her hands but ignored her lightsaber in a new gesture of partnership. "Darkness is within you as it is all of us. _Accept it._ Now, will you fight against destiny all your life, or will you accept your fate now, Revan, and seize your greatest victory?"

_No, not the dark side…!_

But being able to choose—who had ever given her a choice before?

_Evil…_

How was freedom evil? And why should she live her life hated when she could take it back, repair the galaxy the Republic had led to destruction?

_Carth knew, he _told _you! You'll make a choice—he said, a choice—and there's no second chance this time! Don't do it…!_

But…

I feel so _lost_…

She stumbled away, blood roaring in her ears. A wind was tearing across the roof of the temple, whipping her hair around her face, and an even deeper-rooted turbulence invaded the Force around her. She shut her eyes, shaking her head, and when she opened them there was even more color: Jolee, a blur of dim green on the ground; strands of gold and pale, milky blue and crimson embroidering the air around her; and Bastila an advancing blaze of red…

And herself, Ashi realized. She glowed as brightly, maybe even more vividly, than anything else. Far from the pale blue or dark red, she was a deep, chaotic violet—a dual-sided color, she realized, not a hue in itself but the merging of two separate shades. Blue engulfed her like fire; scarlet twined around her like a thousand serpents. Gold laced through the whole mess, strands of it weaving into her hair, twining through her fingers, darting back and forth across her skin. It could have been strength, or it could have been uncertainty. She couldn't say.

A sudden lump rose in her throat like a rock, and she swallowed hard. It wasn't the red. There was darkness in her, maybe, but it wasn't that alone. There was so much blue, so much potential for _more._

She wasn't lost. She was tied to the Force. That was from Manaan, that wisdom, but it didn't return alone. The Force was as much part of her as her blood, her bones, her mind, and was it so perfect? No—she'd seen a tainted Force on Korriban, but what she'd taken for something good stained with evil had simply been another facet. And what about the lightning? It was only a weapon in the hands of someone who would make it one. No, the Force was light _and_ dark, like it or not…

And so, Bastila had just declared, were people…

And so wasn't it only _natural_ that so was she?

If the Force was so deeply part of her, how could she pick and choose a side of it? You took the Force as a whole, just as you took people as a whole. She couldn't simply scrub away the darkness, any more than she could smother the light. It came a single organism, like it did for anyone. Jedi or Sith weren't good or evil in absolution; it was just that all they knew was the side they had chosen.

But Ashi could see them both.

There it was: the epiphany she'd wanted, absolutely gorgeous in its simplicity. So what, if the dark was inside her? So was the light. She was a living chiaroscuro, a study in contrast. She wasn't more evil than a Jedi, nor holier than a Sith—what she had was the knowledge that she was made of both.

_There is darkness_, she thought, looking at the red as it wound eagerly around her fingers. _I see it, and I accept it. _

_But it's not _me_._

She shook her head. Bastila hesitated, a ripple of gold through her aura betraying her disbelief, and Ashi took a deep breath.

"Ashi," she corrected. "My name is _Ashi_."

There was something in her face that must have scared Bastila, because the ex-Jedi stumbled back, going even paler than usual. Her black veins stood out starkly against her skin like tree branches against a winter sky. Ashi advanced, pocketing her lightsaber in a calm, swift movement, but when Bastila, newly reminded of her weapon, made to grab for it, Ashi jerked the weapon away from her fingertips. Suddenly it was her holding the red double-blade that sprang to life, hissing like an animal in her hands. "Nice," she commented, spinning it experimentally from hand to hand. "Well balanced. Very good for stabbing in the back."

"You won't kill me," Bastila stuttered. "Your _Jedi _wouldn't allow it."

Ashi gave a philosophical shrug. "Don't really give a frack what the Jedi say, do I?"

"You wouldn't do it," insisted the ex-Jedi, shaking her head. "You wouldn't—"

"Do what?" Ashi swung the lightsaber in a flash of scarlet, and it finished glowing barely an inch from Bastila's chest. "Do _this_?"

"No," Bastila breathed, shaking her head ever so slightly. It could have been a statement of disbelief or a protest, and maybe both.

Ashi met her gaze readily. "I'm not going to kill you," she said softly. "You don't deserve it. Death's easy. Life—" She broke off, eyes darting deliberately to where Juhani had fallen. "Life," she finished flatly, "is harder."

"_No!_" Bastila exclaimed, and flung out her hands desperately. It was a feeble attack, barely enough to make Ashi stumble back, but it gave Bastila all the time she needed to start running. Ashi dug in her heels, starting after her, but gave up the chase after barely a couple steps. It wasn't worth it, and Jolee needed her attention much more.

She knelt next to him, sighing when he began instantly to complain. "This may hurt a little," she mocked, waving a hand carefully across his head.

He groaned, rolling over as she let him go. For a moment, his eyes were unfocused, but then he blinked and frowned at her, his eyebrows curling downwards like a pair of excitable caterpillars. "Lass?" he mumbled, clearing his throat. "Did you…?"

"Did I…?" Ashi prompted, before realizing his gaze was directed at the lightsaber next to her. "No!" she replied hastily. "No, she ran; I didn't—"

He smiled, and for a moment the spark in his eyes belied his age. "I meant," he corrected, "did you choose the right side?"

There was a pause, and then Ashi smiled. He wasn't watching her, though, for sorely missed and gorgeous though the expression was, what he could see in the Force was far more interesting. It had… _resolved _itself, he thought slowly, was what it was—like a blizzard settling into a landscape of shining white, so had her aura settled into a deep, rich amethyst. And incidentally, he decided, it was certainly fraught with more blue than red now, no matter how she'd intended it.

But although it danced and leapt in a river of motion, gone was the hectic pace, the underlying chaos of it. She'd made her choice, but more than that, she was happy with it.

"I think—" she started, and then cut herself off. "Yeah," she corrected. "I _did._"

Jolee Bindo's head hurt—_badly_—and he'd just watched a young traitor murder her ex-friend, and he was well aware that there was only worse to come now, but for a moment, he still couldn't have been prouder.

* * *

Ashi saw the crowd around the Ebon Hawk from far away, the entire crew having gravitated, for one reason or another, to wait for their friends. She and Jolee were in no hurry to arrive; she had no idea how he was holding up, but knew she felt like her body was one massive bruise. Briefly they'd disappeared from view, the cliffside panorama obscured as they started down through the forest, but it seemed only moments later that Ashi shoved aside a bush to find the grass fading to sand, and the sand sloping down to the Ebon Hawk and its crew.

She approached them coolly, trying to pretend she didn't feel like she was about to pass out. That wasn't to say it wasn't hard—the sun had all but set, leaving just the faintest glimmer of red along the horizon—essentially, she'd been fighting since noon, and at the moment all that kept her on her feet was the thought of what was still coming.

Carth was the first to see them, jumping instantly to his feet. "You're back!" he exclaimed, his face lighting up, but Mission cut in. "Oh my god, Ash!" she yelped, and in a moment had raced up to and flung her arms around her friend, leaving Ashi to wonder nervously exactly how pathetic she looked. "Ash, are you okay? You look—"

She broke off, pulling her hand back to find her fingers dark with congealing blood. "Oh, my _god_," Mission breathed, paling. "Ash, you're _bleeding_—"

"Was," Ashi corrected faintly. "_Was_ bleeding." But she closed her eyes for a moment in disgust as, against her better instinct, she reached up to touch the back of her head. Her hand came back equally macabre, fingertips a sticky, dark red, and she convulsed inwardly, vividly aware of the last two hours. She met Canderous's gaze for a moment—he was leaning against the ship, and raised an eyebrow as if to ask, _good fight?_ Ashi grimaced in response, offering the slightest shake of her head.

Carth, meanwhile, wasn't half as nonchalant. "Are you all right?" he pressed, but Dustil cut in over him with, "Where's Juhani?"

Ashi took a deep breath. "Bastila tried to kill me. I fought her, and she ran away. She's on her way to the Star Forge now. Juhani…"

She broke off, lowering her head. A couple strands of hair blew across her face, standing out sharply against her suddenly pale cheeks. "Bastila killed her," Jolee finished dully, when she made no effort to continue.

For a moment, they both looked helplessly towards the other, maybe for reassurance. They'd left Juhani by the temple—what else was there to do? Dig for her in the small mountain of marble by the temple? The Rakata had been horrified to see their building destroyed, and even Nicul had seemed about to demand an explanation, but something about Ashi's face had stopped him. The puzzled Elders had watched the two humans go stand next to a pile of rubble in silence for a moment—puzzled because, with their inbuilt Force-vision, it was automatically clear to them that whoever had fallen was no more.

There was a collective second of incredulity, everyone momentarily doubting their ears. "Bastila did _what_?" Mission demanded. "Bastila the _Jedi_?"

Ashi's eyes narrowed. "Bastila the Sith, now," she corrected. "You'd be amazed how far the princess has come."

"Force." Dustil shook his head, eyes wide with horror. "Force, can she even _be_ turned back now? If she did _that_?"

"We'll find out," Ashi shrugged, eyes hardening slightly. "She's going to be at the Star Forge. I guess we just…" She paused, searching, and then sighed. "It depends on what she chooses, I guess."

Jolee's eyes sparked suddenly, as if something had just occurred to him. "And speaking of choices," he leapt in, with a conspiratorial glance towards Ashi, "I must say, it's good to have you with us, my dear. For a minute there I thought you might decide… well." He stopped, only a light smile betraying his obvious pride. "Never mind what I thought."

"Decide?" Carth frowned. "Decide what?"

Ashi was about to mutter something about typical Sith recruitment, not really important and shouldn't they be going now, anyway, but Jolee seemed determined not to downplay an inch of it. "In the temple, Bastila invited Ashi to come back to the dark side," he explained. "Take up her old mantle and whatnot." He paused, allowing a beat for it to sink in, and then finished, "She failed."

Carth stared, lips curling up into a smile that refused to be suppressed. "You said no?" he demanded, taking a step closer. "I mean, you rejected her?"

Ashi rolled her eyes. "You could _try_ not to sound surprised."

"Ashi!" He cut her off, shaking his head in delight. She looked almost shy at the attention—a feeling, he noted, that she'd almost never shown before. But she had no need to be shy: she'd just saved them all, rejected the dark side and the title Lord of the Galaxy. It was nothing less than he'd hoped for, better than he'd dreamed of.

"What did I tell you?" he persisted, stepping closer. Without thinking, his hand slipped into hers, and when she didn't jerk away he held on tighter, savoring the feeling. "I said you'd have to make a choice, and you did—you made the right one!"

It was such a perfect moment that he hesitated, trying to hold onto it before realizing his mistake. He shouldn't have paused—it gave too much time for the words to fade, long enough for her to register his hand around hers and the stares of the crewmates. Carth knew all too well that this was about the point last time where he'd fracked up royally with _I think I could love you_. Instinct told him to backpedal before he said something similar and equally stupid—which, in all honesty, he was likely to if she kept standing this close.

"I mean…" He stopped, searching for something, _anything_ platonic. "I'm very… very proud of you."

She blinked, and it registered that he was starting to drift closer, like metal gravitating towards a magnet. Oh frack, oh frack—he was leaning in, definitely now, but she simply couldn't do it. The wires holding her mind together had frayed through, and what she wanted most of all was to curl up in a ball and sleep for a day or two: in other words, not this—not _now_.

She leant back, cringing slightly away, and there was an awful moment where she watched his eyes widen slightly, his mouth open a fraction in shock. He started to go pale, his ever-present stubble standing out every more starkly against his skin. "No," she said quickly, grabbing his arm. "No, Carth, please, I just… can we talk?"

He tugged back a fraction, eyeing her dubiously. "Talk?"

"On the ship," she murmured, closing her eyes tightly. She felt like a hurricane had passed through her, as though every piece of her, inside and out, had been blown around half to death. "Carth—I can't fracking _do_ this now, Carth, okay?"

His jaw tightened—disappointment? Frustration? No… definitely a frack-load of both—and he nodded once, tersely, as he pulled away. "You should get yourself cleaned up," he said stiffly. "If we're right, the Republic will be there in less than twelve hours."

"I'll do that," she said faintly. "Yeah." As soon as he said it she was again aware of the blood crusting in her hair and on her neck. It was disgusting, almost violently so, but she turned away, forcing herself to swallow. The entire crew was staring at them, waiting expectantly for either the explosion or kiss that wasn't coming. Ashi closed her eyes, willing herself not to feel their stares like spotlights. She risked a glance—Canderous was raising his eyebrows, and shook out one hand as if he'd just burned it when he met her eyes. Beside him, Mission's eyebrows had knitted together, and Ashi saw her lips moving in a silent question to Dustil, across from her. _Frack…_

_No. Calm down. Think... think of the bright side._

Yeah—the bright side. Like, maybe there was a convenient hole she could go hide in for the rest of her life nearby...

Then, from Ashi's right, came a grating noise that, she realized after a moment, had been HK attempting the droid version of throat-clearing. "Statement: master," he began plaintively, "the impending slaughter I have been promised is long overdue. Query: might we go disembowel the Usurper now before he destroys us all?"

Ashi tried—_really_—but the temptation to ask was too much. "_Disembowel_?"

"Affirmation: oh, yes, master. I find it to be a most effective way of making sure meatbags stay dead. Suggestion: perhaps a stomach wound; those are often sufficiently painful to—"

"Right. _Star Forge_," Ashi interrupted deliberately, cutting him off. "HK's right—I mean, HK and Carth are right. The Republic's going to need our help."

The pilot nodded. "I'll go start up the ship," he said, a statement of fact rather than an offer, turning for the gangplank.

Ashi nodded, indicating with a tilt of her head the rest of them should follow. They all began to make their way onto the ship, HK practically flying up the ramp, and only once they were all on did she follow, swallowing hard.

The unhelpful thought, _Brace yourself_, raced through her mind, but Ashi suspected there were some things you were never ready for, even the second time.

She'd just have to find out.

* * *

Bastila strode down the hall, face blazing with purpose. She looked like a cat coiled to strike: every footstep was shot through with a fierce, tense grace; her eyes flashed like oil lamps in the dim light. Her cloak and hair were both unkempt, a strange and unnerving deviation from her usual meticulousness, but she didn't care.

The Jedi had lied. Her new _master_ had lied. Even Revan, in the end—they'd all lied to her. They were all against her, no matter what side they were on, fighting to keep Bastila in her place. She'd show him. Revan had surprised her, but she knew Malak, _and_ his weakness.

A door ghosted open noiselessly in front of her. What had Revan said about her lightsaber—good for stabbing in the back? It would have to be: he stood at the end of the room, eyeing the approaching starfleet through the window. Before him towered a massive map of the Star Forge, system checks sparking and lines of code flickering through the factory's massive image.

She had the advantage of surprise, but couldn't be bothered to waste time on it. She raced towards him, feet pattering on the metal walkway. By her side, her lightsaber hissed alive, and she swung towards him, aiming straight for his heart—

He spun in an instant, catching her blade inches from his skin. "Bastila," he hissed, meeting her gaze. "Back so soon?"

"Liar!" she snarled, lunging again. He staggered back under the sudden barrage, lightsaber flying through his hands to hold her off. She wasn't strong, not physically, but there was a new intensity in her face, and a missing sheen of reason, both of which gave her a new energy he'd never seen.

"Turning on your master already?" he demanded, forcing her back a step with a cleaving swing. Now she stood a step down from him, and he allowed himself an inward smile. Always have the higher ground in a fight.

"_Liar!_" she repeated, voice nearly… _breaking?_ Frack, what had Revan done to her? "You said I'd be powerful—you said I'd rule the galaxy!"

"_Apprentice_," he snapped, forcing her back. "Does the word mean nothing? I am your master, Bastila."

"You're _wrong_!" she screeched, shaking her head desperately. Malak started: tears were beginning to run down her face, staining her cheeks silver. Even torture had done nothing like this to the girl.

Then again, Revan knew the Force far better than him. What had she done: was she controlling Bastila through the bond? Or had she simply taken the girl's mind away, driven her insane? He'd seen her do that before—she never liked to attempt it on their captured Jedi, calling it a waste of resources, but she'd been good at it nonetheless.

"I have no master!" Bastila panted, ducking his blade and swinging low, a cut that caught him along the bottom of his ribs. "I didn't leave the Jedi for _you_ to control me. I am my _own_ master!"

This was strange. He didn't think the ones Revan tortured had been like this. Coherent speech had been beyond them, if he recalled right, let alone riposte. But if this wasn't Revan's doing…

"You are the apprentice," he hissed. "Unless you believe you can defeat me?" His eyes glittered with amusement. "Don't fool yourself. You are nothing but a child, Bastila."

"I'm _strong!_" she shrieked. "You told me I'd be strong now!"

"What do you know of strength?" he demanded, swiping at her. She stumbled back, almost losing her footing on the steps, and he advanced, pushing her back onto the open floor. "Have you ever fought a war, Bastila? Have you ever ruled an army? Or did you run crying to your masters at any sign of conflict?"

He swung at her, a blow that grazed her arm and made her cry out. "Where do you expect strength to come from, Bastila," he challenged, "if there is none within?"

"How can _you_ talk about strength?" she demanded, leaping back. Suddenly she had grabbed at the Force, using it to speed her movement. She ducked away from him, throwing out a hand, and lightning rippled along his free arm. Malak yelled in anger, lunging towards her. "What about you, Malak? You can't even kill Revan. She's the only thing in your way, and you still love her!"

It was as if he had been drenched in ice water. He froze, barely managing to parry her next strike, and she laughed madly at the hesitation. "You do!" she exclaimed. "I knew it! How are you worthy to be the master? I _deserve _this!"

"You don't understand, child!" he growled, steeling himself with some effort. "Who have you ever loved?"

Bastila took a shuddering breath, spinning around him as he slashed towards her. Their lightsabers, twin blades, danced against each other, lighting up the scene like a camera's flash. "I don't need _love_," she declared. "I don't need _anyone_. I'm stronger than you, Malak—I _deserve_ to—"

"Silence!"

He swung at her viciously, the blow twisting her arm as she struggled to block it. She stumbled backwards, and he rushed at her, knocking her blade from her hand with a single blow. Bastila gasped.

But... but it made no_ sense_! _But I'm stronger, _protested a fading voice in her mind; _but I was _worthy_! _She couldn't lose, not to both of them. She'd deserved power, she'd left everything she knew _for_ power—and it made no difference? She was supposed to be strong now! She'd done everything she had to: left the Jedi, honed her talent, challenged her master when she was ready…

Why wasn't it good enough?

"I'm strong," she insisted, feeling, to her eternal shame, liquid welling up in her eyes. She willed herself not to blink, but she couldn't help it, and a drop spilled over.

"You are _weak_," Malak spat, eyeing her with disgust. Bastila struggled to fight back the tears, but the more he looked at her like that, the harder it became. After a moment, he jerked his head up slightly. "Get up."

"Wha—?"

In a single motion, he tucked his blade into his belt, grabbing her shoulder with a steel grip. Bastila yelped as he dragged her to her feet, taking hold of her arms as she gaped at him.

"You are my _apprentice_," he breathed, "until you are no longer useful to me. You are not stronger, and you cannot defeat me. If the Republic…" He broke off, glancing towards the window for confirmation, and then scowled. "Were the Republic not coming, I would kill you now. Do you understand?"

She was shaking, unable to help herself, but gave a single nod. Her arms hurt so badly—she could feel bruises forming under his fingers, and wished she still were able to heal them.

"Then understand this," Malak snapped. "If you disobey me again, I will show _no_ mercy, Bastila. _None_."

She swallowed, closing her eyes and cringing as more tears peppered her cheeks. "I understand."

He paused. "What did you say?"

She snuffled, swallowing hard before replying. "I understand… master."

He let go of her abruptly, and she stumbled, catching herself on the railing of the walkway. He began to walk away, heading for a door across the room. Bastila watched him go, the tears now running freely down her cheeks. She'd never known shame before, not really, but it was a crippling emotion—and of all the ones she'd recently become familiar with, her least favorite.

Her master glanced back at her, face contorting in anger. "Go," he commanded, voice sharp and fearsome. "Prepare your Battle Meditation—unless you're completely worthless to me now?"

His tone left no guesses as to what happened to the worthless. She shook her head desperately and he turned away, storming through the far door in a whirl of black and red. Bastila's head moved slowly, first towards the window—the starfleet, originally pinpoints of silver, were now growing specks—and then to her room around her, lingering on the map, and finally to her own hands: white shot through with lines of black, fingertips still trembling too badly to move. Her legs suddenly couldn't support her, and she slumped to the ground, holding her head in her hands.

The Force was supposed to free you, wasn't it?

_Liars.

* * *

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**X) And there's a little angst for the road. Gah--I *still* like Bastila-centric scenes too much (which I'm sure says something wonderful about me...)  
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**Ah, well. Tormented Sith gives me plenty to write about. The real showdown's coming next time, in a chapter appropriately titled, um, "Showdown". Until then, reviews are the best kind of motivation while I'm working on the next (penultimate!) chapter...  
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	32. Showdown, pt I

**Again, I'm really sorry about editing the last chapter. It was unfair to everyone, and a really stupid thing for me to do. But necessary. I do stand by necessary.  
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**That said, thank you to all of you for bearing with me. You guys are the best. (Corny, you say? Yep. A little. But kinda true. Thanks, everyone ^_^)**

******Oh, and for the record: this story is officially a year old (yeah, KotOR's honestly eaten a full years-worth of my time). There was an age when I wondered how people could stick with a story for that long-now, I kinda depress myself as I realized _I_ let that happen...**

******Disclaimer: Don't own KotOR (or the last year of my life...)  
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**Showdown: 1. ****the laying down of one's cards, face upward, in a card game, esp. poker; ****2. ****a conclusive settlement of a difference in which all resources and power are used

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From the last chapter (edited):

_Jolee's eyes sparked suddenly, as if something had just occurred to him. "And speaking of choices," he leapt in, with a conspiratorial glance towards Ashi, "I must say, it's good to have you with us, my dear. For a minute there I thought you might decide… well." He stopped, only a light smile betraying his obvious pride. "Never mind what I thought."_

_"Decide?" Carth frowned. "Decide what?"_

_Ashi was about to mutter something about typical Sith recruitment, not really important and shouldn't they be going now, anyway, but Jolee seemed determined not to downplay an inch of it. "In the temple, Bastila invited Ashi to come back to the dark side," he explained. "Take up her old mantle and whatnot." He paused, allowing a beat for it to sink in, and then finished, "She failed."_

_Carth stared, lips curling up into a smile that refused to be suppressed. "You said no?" he demanded, taking a step closer. "I mean, you rejected her?"_

_Ashi rolled her eyes. "You could try not to sound surprised."_

_"Ashi!" He cut her off, shaking his head in delight. She looked almost shy at the attention—a feeling, he noted, that she'd almost never shown before. But she had no need to be shy: she'd just saved them all, rejected the dark side and the title Lord of the Galaxy. It was nothing less than he'd hoped for, better than he'd dreamed of._

_"What did I tell you?" he persisted, stepping closer. Without thinking, his hand slipped into hers, and when she didn't jerk away he held on tighter, savoring the feeling. "I said you'd have to make a choice, and you did—you made the right one!"_

_It was such a perfect moment that he hesitated, trying to hold onto it before realizing his mistake. He shouldn't have paused—it gave too much time for the words to fade, long enough for her to register his hand around hers and the stares of the crewmates. Carth knew all too well that this was about the point last time where he'd fracked up royally with I think I could love you. Instinct told him to backpedal before he said something similar and equally stupid—which, in all honesty, he was likely to if she kept standing this close._

_"I mean…" He stopped, searching for something, anything platonic. "I'm very… very proud of you."_

_She blinked, and it registered that he was starting to drift closer, like metal gravitating towards a magnet. Oh frack, oh frack—he was leaning in, definitely now, but she simply couldn't do it. The wires holding her mind together had frayed through, and what she wanted most of all was to curl up in a ball and sleep for a day or two: in other words, not this—not now._

_She leant back, cringing slightly away, and there was an awful moment where she watched his eyes widen slightly, his mouth open a fraction in shock. He started to go pale, his ever-present stubble standing out every more starkly against his skin. "No," she said quickly, grabbing his arm. "No, Carth, please, I just… can we talk?"_

_He tugged back a fraction, eyeing her dubiously. "Talk?"_

_"On the ship," she murmured, closing her eyes tightly. She felt like a hurricane had passed through her, as though every piece of her, inside and out, had been blown around half to death. "Carth—I can't fracking _do_ this now, Carth, okay?"_

_His jaw tightened—_disappointment? Frustration? No… definitely a frack-load of both_—and he nodded once, tersely, as he pulled away. "You should get yourself cleaned up," he said stiffly. "If we're right, the Republic will be there in less than twelve hours."_

_"I'll do that," she said faintly. "Yeah." As soon as he said it she was again aware of the blood crusting in her hair and on her neck. It was disgusting, almost violently so, but she turned away, forcing herself to swallow. The entire crew was staring at them, waiting expectantly for either the explosion or kiss that wasn't coming. Ashi closed her eyes, willing herself not to feel their stares like spotlights. She risked a glance—Canderous was raising his eyebrows, and shook out one hand as if he'd just burned it when he met her eyes. Beside him, Mission's eyebrows had knitted together, and Ashi saw her lips moving in a silent question to Dustil, across from her. _Frack…

No. Calm down. Think... think of the bright side.

_Yeah—the bright side. Like, maybe there was a convenient hole she could go hide in for the rest of her life nearby..._

_Then, from Ashi's right, came a grating noise that, she realized after a moment, had been HK attempting the droid version of throat-clearing. "Statement: master," he began plaintively, "the impending slaughter I have been promised is long overdue. Query: might we go disembowel the Usurper now before he destroys us all?"

* * *

_

"Admiral Dodonna, this is Carth Onasi, do you read? Repeat, do you read?"

"Carth?" The hologram jumped and flickered, resolving into the staticky image of a woman in a Republic uniform. Her features were sharp, eyes knifelike despite the blurring projector, and she spoke in a clipped, collected military cadence. "Carth Onasi? Space, you're still alive? Where have you been?"

"The Star Forge's defense systems grounded us," he replied, voice growing terser and more abrupt with every syllable. "Admiral, has the attack on the Star Forge begun?"

She nodded. "Carth, where in the name of the Force did they get their technology? This is nothing we've ever seen before—I don't know if we can stand against their firepower." Worry lines dug into her face, accompanying what was clearly a painfully reluctant admission.

"You're going to have to try," Ashi replied, crossing her arms. Carth glanced up at her with badly concealed fear—easy to forget she was talking to his boss—but she ignored him, eyeing the admiral instead. "This is alien technology. You've got to get rid of it now—if you don't, you're not going to be able to stop the Sith."

The admiral's eyes narrowed as she struggled to get a clear view of Ashi. "Carth, who is this?"

"No one," replied Ashi, quirking an eyebrow as she stepped surreptitiously back. The motion looked innocuous, but their fracked-up holo connection meant that, if Ashi was right, her face was now be impossible to make out.

"One of the crew of the Ebon Hawk," Carth replied, leaping in for damage control. "She's a Jedi, but she's worked with the Republic before—she knows more about this Star Forge than any of us, Admiral. I'd listen to her."

Dodonna's face pinched slightly. "Well, I suppose a recommendation from Carth Onasi is well-merited indeed. What do you know of the Star Forge, Jedi?"

"It's the source of all the Sith technology," Ashi rattled off, realizing as she spoke that this military seriousness must be contagious, for it was infecting even her words. "Their ships, droids, weapons, everything. You've got to destroy it now, while you can, or you'll end up fighting never-ending reinforcements."

"That's less simple than you seem to think," replied Dodonna tersely. A shiver of static ran across her figure, blurring the words for a moment. "…Can't get our capital ships in place. The Sith seem to know what we're going to do before we even begin implementation."

_Oh, space._ Sometimes it was so easy to forget that the brat was so damn _powerful_. "They've got Bastila on their side," she explained, taking a deep breath to quiet any trace of fury in her voice. "She's helping them—that's Battle Meditation that's stopping you."

Dodonna let out a long, slow breath, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Damn," she murmured, so quietly Ashi suspected she and Carth weren't meant to have heard. "That's our weapon," the admiral lamented, shaking her head. "The crux of it is that there's no way to fight it from any distance. There's no way we can compete with that if Bastila's behind it."

At that moment, there was a burst of noise, not unlike the clearing of a throat, and a new figure appeared in the holo projecter. Dodonna seemed surprised and then slightly irritated as Vandar eyed Ashi curiously, but said nothing. "I suspected it might be Bastila," admitted the small Jedi, sighing wearily. "We have no hope of defeating her from afar. Our only chance is to disrupt her meditation, so that the Republic may move into position."

Dodonna glanced down at him, looking rather as if she had just found something mildly disgusting on her pristine Republic-issue boots. "Oh?" she wondered. "And how do you propose we do that, _Master_ Vandar?"

"I have Jedi Knights who could board the Star Forge," he replied calmly, "if the Republic can secure a route to the entrance for them. Perhaps if they can make their way through the Star Forge, they can manage to stop Bastila from using her powers."

Dodonna frowned, mulling it over. "Perhaps," she conceded dubiously. There was a momentary pause, and then Ashi sighed.

"They're going to need backup, aren't they?"

Vandar hesitated, clasping his fingers nervously, and then admitted, "Yes."

He couldn't see the pair of them very well, for the holo reception was at least equally bad from Dodonna's, but he saw the woman—Revan? Or was it presumptuous to assume that?—nod grimly.

"Then that's what we're here for," she replied.

* * *

"Ash?"

Mission snuck a glance around the corner, but quickly withdrew her head; Ashi and Carth were both staring intently at an official-looking holo of a woman, their faces telling Mission instantly that they didn't have the time to talk. She ducked back around the corner, biting her lip. Of course Ashi was busy—they were about to decide the fate of the galaxy, for space's sake.

Unfortunately, that was exactly why Mission needed someone to talk to.

She turned instead for the hallway, making her way cautiously towards the men's quarters. She knew Jolee was busy flying the ship—Carth, always eager to prove old habits died hard, had point-blank refused to let a Mandalorian pilot his Hawk—and Big Z was occupied building grenades or something, but she had no desire to walk in on a half-dressed Canderous. She'd done that once before, and doubted she would ever fully recover from the experience.

But none of the older warriors were there. Instead, to Mission's relief, she found only the person she'd been looking for. "Dustil?"

He started before whirling to stare at her, jamming his lightsaber hastily into his belt. She recognized vaguely the armor he had on, an Echani suit that she thought she might have seen Carth wearing before. It was slightly too big for Dustil, but he seemed to be pretending not to realize that. He looked, Mission realized, a lot older suddenly, even if he only really had a year and a little on her. The thought didn't reassure her at all.

"Nice armor," she offered, but there was a question in her tone. Why did he need it; would she, as well?

"Thanks," he said noncommittally, sitting down on his bunk. There was a brief pause that he finally broke. "What's up, Mish?"

She hesitated, gripping the doorframe. "We… are we gonna be there soon?"

Dustil shrugged. "Sure. I guess."

Mission chewed on her tongue, trying to figure out how to talk to him. He looked so confident, sitting there in his grown-up armor, and she felt for the first time like she was the only one of them who was a kid. He watched her, gaze growing less harsh and filling with concern as she search for words.

"Mish?" he wondered, and she met his gaze, looking suddenly… upset? _Dammit. _"C'mere," he said, motioning to the bed, and she made her way gratefully into the room, taking a seat next to him. He wrapped an arm, after a moment of deliberation around her shoulders—wasn't that what you were supposed to do with girls if they were upset? "Are you okay?" he asked carefully.

Mission toyed with the blanket, looking down. "Are you… are you scared?"

He snorted. "_No_."

"Oh. Right." A pause. "Because, you know, me either."

"Yeah," he agreed, "yeah, no. Yeah."

Silence.

"Dustil?"

"A little," he blurted.

"Oh, space," she breathed, and then relaxed, slumping back against the wall. "Me too," she agreed fervently. "It's just, like… it's such a big deal, right? Everything we did so far's been heading for this, and this is going to be, like, our final chance to stop Malak, and I know he's going to fight Ashi, 'cause she's got to, right, but then Big Z's probably going to do something stupid 'cause of his lifedebt, and Jolee's _old_—can't he have, like, a heart attack or something if he gets too stressed? And then your dad—"

"Don't get me started on Carth," Dustil groaned. "He's going to try to be a hero, and get hurt, or… dammit. Force, he's so…." He closed his eyes, breath whistling through his gritted teeth.

"He's not stupid," Mission protested. "He won't do that."

"You're the one who's so scared for him."

"I'm scared for all of us!" she snapped. "Space, Dustil! Least I'm not the one running around in my dad's armor. You think Ash's even going to let you off the ship?"

His eyes darkened, face hardening in a moment. "Why? You think I can't handle it?"

"I… you know what?" she snapped, pulling away. "No, I don't. You're a _kid_, Dustil! We're both kids—"

"I'm not a _kid_," he hissed, suddenly vividly self-conscious of the armor and his visions of single-handedly destroying platoons of dark Jedi. "You think you survive on Korriban for five years by being a _kid_, Mission? You think you get to be a kid after you watch your home bombed to death?"

"You even know who you're _talking_ to?" she demanded. "Y'know how many actual Tarisian survived the bombing, Dustil? _One_, and you're fracking looking at her. So don't you dare go all high-and-mighty on me—you ain't seen _nothing_ I ain't seen. You're _still_ just a kid."

He glared at her—for a moment he was back on Korriban, being lectured: _you're a failure, Dustil, and you know what the Sith do with failures_. "I'm fighting," he snapped. "You can't tell me not to. It's my fight just as much as it is Ash's, or my dad's, or any of ours."

She frowned, not as angrily as a moment ago. Suddenly she looked… thoughtful. "Then… then it's my fight too, ain't it?"

He shrugged. "Depends."

"On what?"

"On if you're picking it."

"Picking fights?" She grinned despite herself. "I'm good at that."

"Don't have to tell _me_ that."

"Hey!" She nudged him lightly with her shoulder, the armor rough against her own bare arm. He laughed, a genuine, warm sound that made her smile for a moment, but then it faded. He turned to look at her, frowning intently and in a way that made something inside her quiver a little.

"So… are you fighting?"

She eyed him uncertainly, biting her lip as she did automatically when she was nervous. Dustil looked so _intense_ all of a sudden: his eyes were all narrowed, fixed directly on her, and his face so completely determined, and even the armor, too-big as it was, didn't really look that bad on him. Mission wasn't going to pretend like she hadn't known he was good-looking, but she'd never seen him look so old before—so out of her own league. What if she _was_ just a kid? Or, even worse, what if that wasn't good enough? She didn't even care—mostly… well, _sort of_ didn't mind—if he thought she was pretty or whatever, but if she was too immature even to be friends with him…

He wasn't challenging her. He wasn't even trying to challenge her, but she could feel him drawing away from her, whether or not he realized. It wouldn't make him angry if she said no, but it would alienate him, and she couldn't have stood to do that now. She wanted to say something significant, kind of like Carth and Ash: if they were going to go risk their lives, shouldn't she say something important now?

The answer was yes—no _duh_—but mumbling '_Dustil, I really like you… like, _like _like_ you' would have killed her. She swallowed, before compromising, "Will you… like, watch out for me? If I do?"

He raised an eyebrow, face utterly solemn. "Mish," he replied, "like my life depended on it."

He wrapped his arms around her, and she leant onto his shoulder, half-wishing she'd had the guts to make a full confession and suspecting she'd just agreed to something very stupid.

* * *

Ashi had heard of the calm before the storm in a battle, but was quick to realize none of them would see it today. There wasn't an ounce of calm to be found in any of them, even those who weren't pulling on armor for the first time. HK, too eager for words, was itching to test his upgraded flamethrower; Jolee, usually so unshakable, was scouring the ship for kolto reserves, mumbling over and over about being too old for these things; and least calm of all was Ashi, who was trying and failing miserably to look collected. She'd ransacked their collection of armor, finally to select Bandon's—with no lack of reservation, but it was still the best they had—and, before suiting up, had taken a couple laps of the ship to make sure everyone was at least more prepared than her.

So far, so good.

This was about where, were Ashi's life ever to take a moment's pause, the calm before the storm might have been. Once they'd finished talking to Dodonna, there was little to do but make their way towards the Star Forge as quickly as possibly. Unfortunately, as quickly as possible was still only so short, and they had a good hour's flight into position. She'd headed to her quarters to pull on the armor, but in the middle of tugging on the sleeve, a voice from the doorway startled her.

"Are we going to talk?"

She spun to find Carth in the doorway, leaning on the frame with his arms crossed. He raised an eyebrow as she yanked on the other sleeve, glaring daggers at him. "Sure," she snapped, punctuating each word with a yank on the belt as she pulled it tight. "Fine. Let's talk."

The moment she said it, he took it as if it were a command to enter, crossing the room in an instant. Her hands, playing uncertainly with the belt, were caught suddenly by the wrist, his fists closing like cuffs around them.

"_Why?_" he asked, almost inaudibly. It wasn't a murmur—there was steel behind it—but neither was it a shout: a question, hanging somewhere in between.

"Do you think I can deal with this?" she hissed. "With you? _Now?_ You think I can handle something else right now _too_?"

"So that's what I am." He stared at her, eyes hardening. "Something to deal with? That's all?"

"You're not listening to me!" she snapped. "Have you ever thought that maybe I don't want this, Carth?"

Oh, frack. His _face_. She'd seen similar expressions before, once or twice: it was the look of someone stabbed from behind, the instant where they realized they're done. "Don't want what?" he asked softly. "Me?"

"A… I… _yes!_" she exploded, slamming down her hands. "Not _now_, Carth! I just don't want… I can't think about… why the frack did this seem like a good time to bring this up?"

He paused, staring at her. "Are you… all right?" he asked finally.

"Am I what?" she demanded. "Oh, sorry—because no one in their right mind would possibly reject you, right? I mean, I _must_ be fracking crazy, because there's no way I just can't deal with this right now!"

"Ashi, calm down," he said softly, holding up his hands in an offering of peace. His jaw had tensed, teeth gritted, and for a moment she thought she saw a flash of pain in his face. For a moment she felt bad, before recalling he'd brought it on himself.

"Don't tell me what to do!" she snarled, turning away. "Carth, I can't think about this right now, all right? And not 'don't want to' or anything—I just _can't_."

"So why can't you?" he demanded, shaking his head. "Ashi, what's _wrong_?"

_Everything._ "Nothing," she growled. "Frack, Carth, can't you just leave me alone?"

"Stop it." He was speaking slowly, placatingly, like someone would take to a scared animal. He took a deep breath, and Ashi wondered if the dark circles under his eyes had always been there. "You can't keep pushing people away, Ashi."

"Why not?" she snapped. "I'm going to lose everyone? I'm only hurting myself?" …_And that's everyone else's job?_

"No," he replied. He met her eyes, staring at her, and there was something in his gaze that Ashi knew she wasn't returning as she looked back at him. "Because I'm not going to let you push me away. And"—his voice took on a lower tone, a less careful one—"I'm not going to let you hurt yourself."

"_Don't,_" she spat, gritting her teeth. "I don't want you trying to keep me safe. I want you keeping yourself alive, Carth. I can't be worried about you."

"But it's all right for me to worry about you?"

"I'm still good at not dying."

"You're very good at nearly dying," he countered. "There's a thin line."

"And it's my job to take care of it. Space," she muttered, falling onto a bunk. "This is what I mean. The only thing I want you worrying about is yourself. I'll take care of myself."

He frowned, taking a seat beside her. "Can you?" he wondered, after a pause.

Ashi bristled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You talked about not wanting to kill Malak," he reminded her. "Are you done with that?"

"Stop it!" she exploded, pressing her hands over her ears—and she was completely aware it was immature, but she couldn't take it any more: everything he was wondering she'd been trying to shove aside for the last few hours. "I'll deal with it, okay? I'm _fine_!"

"You're not fine."

"I'm good enough," she insisted, hands slipping to cover her face as she rubbed her eyes. "I told you, I don't want you worrying about me."

"That's not really something I can help."

"Well, help it," she hissed. "You're worried about you; I'm worried about me. Your job right now is staying alive, Carth."

"Then you have to take care of yourself," he answered immediately. "For all of us, Ashi."

Ashi shot him a look from the edge of her gaze. "_I'm_ worrying about me," she reminded him sharply.

Carth grinned wearily, shaking his head. There was a wry kind of humor in his eyes, as though she'd just said something funnier than she realized. "You're never going to be the only one," he replied, half-sadly.

He was so fracking _stupid_, to sit there and say that, so completely oblivious, but she reached up to hug him nonetheless. He hugged her back, but then, because it was a risk he knew he would regret forever if he didn't take it, he shifted closer, leaning in to kiss her.

Ashi had seen it coming—not to say she'd figured out how to respond, but she'd seen it. It was what happened next she didn't expect. For a moment Carth's lips were moving against hers, slightly chapped and desperately hopeful, but then suddenly…

… "_I can't wait to finish training," she declared, taking a seat on the low wall and crossing her legs. The sun was low in the sky in front of them, casting a sheen of gold across the dancing grasses. Behind them loomed the Jedi Enclave, crouched in the middle of the fields like some massive animal trying but failing miserably to camouflage. "I'm going to be a Sentinal—Dorak told me I'd be good at that."_

"_I want to be a Guardian," Alek replied, taking a seat beside her. His hand slipped into hers as he sat—not to be strange, but because for them it was the most natural thing in the world. "You know, seeing as I'm only one step above Force-blinds with all the mental stuff."_

_She nudged him lightly with one shoulder. "You'd be a great Guardian," she replied. "Fearless, right?"_

_He shrugged. "Don't know about that."_

"_Why?" she wondered, glancing over at him in surprise. The sunset was glowing red across his face, but his hair had grown so shaggy recently that half his face was still in shadow. "What're you scared of?"_

_He shrugged awkwardly. "I don't know," he muttered, but then, "Taking risks, I guess."_

"Why_?" she repeated. "You don't get anywhere without taking risks."_

"_Yeah," he countered, "but you can screw stuff up, too."_

_She paused. The hush of wind in the grass field the air for a moment, and then she wondered, "So… what would you do if you weren't scared?"_

_He looked down for a moment, and then spoke again, much more quietly. "Actually," he said, "there's something I've wanted to try for a while."_

_There was a pause. "Well?" she prompted, but when he stayed quiet, she turned to stare at him. He was looking back at her, and his fingers, thick and much bigger than hers, tightened on her hand. Slowly, he leant forward, and for a moment she fought back shock, but then his mouth was on hers, moving slowly but with increasing confidence. Reflexes she'd never known she had kicked in, and she was leaning in, kissing him back, as the watercolor sky faded slowly behind them…_

_..._Ashi jerked away, abruptly past the point of horror. Carth blinked in surprise, staring at her. "Ashi?" he demanded. "Are you… are you _crying_?"

Her hands flew to her cheeks to find, to her horror, that they were wet. A drop of salt caught of the corner of her mouth, running along her lip. Her breath was shaking with the intensity of the memory, with the sudden echo of how _happy_ she'd been back in that moment. Carth bent down beside her, wavering as if he weren't sure whether to take her hand or shake her. "Ashi?"

"Go," she hissed, pressing her the heel of her palm to her eyes in a futile effort to stop the tears. "Carth, just _go_."

He hesitated brokenly, and then backed slowly away, footsteps clanking slowly down the hall. She curled over on the side of the bed, folding her arms across her face and hating her mind, and its timing, and the fact that the kiss she'd been remembering had made her a thousand times happier than the one from Carth, as it lasted.

And, from up in the cockpit, Jolee called to anyone listening that they had three hours left until they arrived.

* * *

Ashi hadn't even realized she'd fallen asleep until she was jolted away by the jolt of landing. Scrambling to her feet with readiness bordering on claustrophobia, she raced out towards the main room, where the rest of the crew was waiting. Exhaustion had, for once, wasted no time by lingering, and she could never remember feeling more wide-awake than as she eyed them all. They stood in a circle, some jittering with anticipation and some impassive, all of them radiating a feverish eagerness like nothing they, as a group, had known before.

They were waiting, Ashi realized, for her to speak, but she was hardly ready for the fight, let alone prepared to make them feel better about it. Still, they were all looking at her, so she opened her mouth—

A crash echoed from outside, and the entire ship jarred, tossing her into the wall. "What the frack?" she demanded, rubbing her shoulder and letting a couple sparks of Force play over it. "Are they… was that a _grenade_?"

A glance out of the window, however, told her everything she had to know. The panorama before them, a battle exploding with firework lightsaber clashes, was enough explanation. "We have to go," she muttered, scrambling up towards the ship's hatch. Canderous and Zaalbar were already down the gangplank, racing towards the fight, and she drew her lightsaber to follow.

Dustil was fast on her tail, and Mission not far behind. The girl scurried down the ramp, gripping her blaster so tightly she suspected it'd be welded to her hand before long. Last down the gangplank, she yelped as a burst of fire engulfed one of the Hawk's supports, scrambling away in terror.

For a moment there was just panic—_what am I doing here?_—and all reflex urged Mission back onto the ship. However, there was something invaluable that Taris had taught her, more than just always to keep a seven-foot Wookiee on hand, and that was how to assess a situation and settle on a response. There was a levelheaded part of her that had gotten pretty decent at that; she'd walked into standoffs in Jayvar's too many times not to know how to get herself out of that one. Even she'd thought it seemed an irrelevant skill at the time, but suddenly it was far more useful than she could have imagined.

Narrowing behind the vision-goggles, her eyes swept the room. Three Sith in a cluster, fighting two Jedi—seemed like a worthy cause. She raised her blaster, fixing the crosshairs on her target with an ease that came from years of rakghoul-sniping. Three Sith equaled three shots. Done and done.

Unfortunately, something Mission had yet to learn was that not all her enemies would be as stupid as rakghouls.

She squeezed the trigger in three short bursts, and to her credit, two even made it. But the third Sith saw it coming and spun his blade, knocking the shot away. It glanced back towards a running Jedi, and the woman caught it square in the back, pitching forward to the ground. Mission stared, blaster falling to her side. She'd seen people killed before, but never an ally, by a shot _she'd _fired…

The dark Jedi, on the other hand, had seen a lot more than she had, and seemed to think a teenage Twi'lek picking off his comrades nothing out of the ordinary. Flicking the cap off a frag grenade, he heaved it at her, not even pausing to watch it land as he spun to gut another Jedi.

"_Mission!_"

The cry came from two different mouths, in two different tongues, but the first voice the girl registered was Zaalbar. One moment she was staring, and the next she hit the ground hard, a solid mass of fur and muscle pinning her down. Her head snapped back against the floor, and she felt blood beginning to trickle from a new cut over her eye. Zaalbar's breath was a low snarl in her ear, and she couldn't tell if it was anger at her or her attacker. The grenade exploded a second later, the sound tearing through Mission's ears. She shrieked, closing her eyes.

When she dared to open them again, it was blue, and it took her a moment to realize that it wasn't just her. The battle raged on on the other side, but curving around her and Big Z was a shield that pulsed with tangible energy. Mission raised her eyes nervously, and found herself staring at Ashi.

"Thanks—"

"_Get on the ship_."

She'd never heard Ash talk like that to her before. Her voice was cold and viciously sharp, the audible equivalent of broken glass. Ashi's eyes were shining with anger, and her lightsaber snarled in her hand as if not only were it alive, but it agreed with her.

She took a step forward and grabbed hold of Mission's arm, yanking her up. The girl cried out, but Ashi, one hand still splayed to hold the shield, glared daggers at her.

"Go!" she hissed. "Frack, Mission, get on the ship now, or I'm going to _drag_ you there!"

"But—" she protested, but Zaalbar, picking himself up, roared his agreement.

"Get out of here!" Ashi growled, teeth gritting, and Mission began to run. Her feet echoed hollowly off the gangplank, and she let it clang shut after her. T3 trundled over, tilting its head to the side, and whistled something timidly about the moisture running down her face. Mission ignored him, dropping her blaster onto the table and collapsing onto a chair. What in space was _wrong_ with Ash? She'd only been trying to help, and her friend and gone and yelled at her. Ashi _never_ yelled.

Mission brushed at her cheeks fiercely, suddenly irritated by the tears there. Everyone was fighting, and she should be too. They were treating her like a kid, and it wasn't fair—she'd been through just as much as them in the last year, maybe more. She'd show Ash she could help.

And Dustil was out there. What was he going to think if she wasn't there to fight?

Well, that left no other choice. She stood up determinedly, scrubbing at her eyes with the back of a hand. It had been kind of a stupid idea to try and go at them head-on—since when had she done that, anyway? They were acting like she didn't understand, but it wasn't that—it was simply that Mission Vao had never played by the rules, and this, of all places, was certainly not the time to start. Why the hell had she even considered trying to shoot at them? There were so many things she could do that would be _so_ much more fun.

She loved the feeling of her stealth belt activating, the way a waterfall of energy surged across her body, trailing invisibility in its wake. T3 beeped in surprise and then reproach, and Mission rolled her eyes.

"Watch the ship," she instructed, and turned for the exit. The sounds of battle still raged outside, and she was going to help.

* * *

Ashi had no recollection of how many Sith she'd fought her way past, nor any idea as to how many were to come. She'd tried to stay with the crew at first, but they'd been hacked apart by the masses of attackers, and now it was all she could do to hope they'd made it this long as well. There was no end to the number of enemies, no sign anywhere to indicate she'd made any progress but for the labyrinth of halls and walkways now extending behind her. She'd almost doubted, in fact, that she would ever make it anywhere, when the elevator caught her eye.

She knew it instantly, a jolt of memory telling her exactly what she'd find at the other end of it. There was a massive room, a towering map sprouting from the floor like a weed, and, no doubt, at least one of the two people she'd really come to fight. She hefted her lightsaber, hacking her way towards the doors with a new motivation.

The battle was shifting away, or maybe she was finally at the fringes of the fight. Either way, there was no one to try and stop her as she sprinted towards the new exit. A keypad glowed on the wall next to the shining chrome doors, a feature that seemed to unveil itself within the memory as soon as she saw it.

She didn't recognize the characters, let alone know how to hack it, but her fingers moved of their own accord, tapping a disjointed but mechanical rhythm on the keys. A single light flashed yellow, and then green, and the doors glided open noiselessly.

It seemed so _easy_.

She turned down the hall, almost to check that this wasn't all a trap, but there was no one running to ambush her. There seemed, in fact, to be less Sith altogether. That was, of course, an improvement. However, there was also no one she recognized in sight. She'd almost wanted someone to grab her arm and insist on coming, like in the temple.

Right, the temple. Where that one gesture of loyalty had ended up getting one of her friends killed. She didn't have any right to ask for friends to come. This was her job.

And so no one was there with her as stepped into the elevator and keyed in the combination for the next floor. The doors _snicked_ closed behind her, and a sharp jolt in the pit of her stomach a moment later told her she was moving, faster and faster...

_...She'd stood here before, robed in black, a mask clinging like a film of frost to her face. Malak had been beside her, solemn-faced. He'd barely moved, but every few seconds his nostrils flared as he breathed in. The darkness they'd been slowly absorbing over the last months wasn't just a concept any more. It was this place: it hung in the air; it tangled along the doorways and crept between the walls; it filled every breath that they took. She could taste it on her lips—a little like roses, and smoke, and fire. Lots of fire._

_It was delicious._

_One corner of her mouth rose in a lopsided grin. "Malak," she said, "we're _here_."_

"_I know," he replied, and after a moment, "Frack."_

_A soft laugh on her part, echoing hollowly through the mask. "Space—you're so eloquent. I think 'frack''s one whole syllable."_

"_How would you describe it, then?"_

_The doors chimed softly, sliding away like servants bowing out of her path. She caught her breath as she eyed the map before her. The entire system was outlined in light, impossible all she'd expected and more. So many times, she'd wondered how their quest would end, but this was everything she had imagined and more._

_Good, too, as she intended to test its every limit. "I prefer actions to words," she replied, striding forward…_

...Reality snapped back into place like an elastic band. Ashi sucked in a deep breath, feeling suddenly like there wasn't enough air in her lungs. She caught herself on one of the walls, closing her eyes. Fracking flashbacks were going to kill her one of these days—like, now.

There were too many things to remember here, though. The memories had an edge unlike the others, except perhaps those of the maps. The dark side had rooted them, and now they rose to the top of her mind like oil floating on water, twisting and coiling across the surface and blurring her thought. There were flickering figures everywhere she looked, a layer of memory superimposed over the entire place.

She closed her eyes, willing the memories desperately back into place. She hardly needed anything else messing with her right now.

Her stomach rose into a throat, a sensation she realized after a moment wasn't just her imagination. The elevator had slowed down.

_Deep breaths. Calm. Don't think too hard. It's just another fight…_

The doors slid back.

* * *

He'd lost her.

He didn't even know how it had happened. The Ebon Hawk's hatch had opened, he'd sprinted down the gangplank, and then… she wasn't there any more.

Frack, he didn't even know what he'd been _thinking. _The Sith were picking off Jedi and Republic soldiers left and right, and everyone was throwing grenades, taking out crowds in a single flash of fire. It was a death zone—the only thing he could imagine remotely like it was the Telos bombing, and he'd told Mission to come.

He was different. He'd been training for fights like this since he was eleven; he knew how to watch out for himself. He knew Mission could find her way out of a street fight, but this was different. This was a full-on war, and it would be far too easy for her to get hurt.

And the problem was, once he started thinking about her, he couldn't _stop_. What if she was stuck in the middle of the fight? What if she'd gotten hurt? What if _he_ hadn't been able to help her like he promised…?

So he was fighting off Sith, but there was a part of him also frantically search every new hall for a flash of blue, even the shimmer of a stealth belt. To be honest, he got a little too into it, and a Sith nearly took his head off more than once. Everyone familiar had long since been torn away by the hoards of attackers, lost in a sea of light and falling bodies, and Dustil had been fighting alone for a while now.

He'd also been worrying about Mission for almost as long.

So his heart jumped into his throat when he heard the roar. There was only one creature capable of a noise like that, and only one Wookiee on the Star Forge. Slashing at a Sith to force him back and bending his knees, he dug in his feet and sprinted towards the sound, carving a path as he ran with his blade. "Z!" he shouted, desperate to be heard over the roar of battle. "Zaalbar, have you seen Mission?"

He turned at the sound of both their names in a sentence, taking in Dustil with all the surprise a moment could afford. /She is on the ship/ he barked, /where she should be./ There was a note of accusation in the last part, as if Zaalbar suspected, thanks to the question, exactly who had tempted Mission away from the ship in the first place.

"Oh." Dustil blinked. "Okay." The Sith he had been fighting ducked in to swing, and he gritted his teeth as he parried back. "Yeah; I mean, good."

Zaalbar roared something that was maybe an agreement, whirling to gut two Sith in a single blow. Dustil had wanted to follow up, but to his left a flash grenade exploded, taking out a mob a couple yards away, and the surge of people stole Zaalbar from view. Dustil ducked away, shielding his eyes as his peripheral vision recovered.

"Correction: the small blue meatbag is not on the ship."

_Frack_. He'd wanted to find the rest of the crew, sure, but of all the people he could have seen, this one was far more a curse then a blessing. HK-47 sidled over, blasting indiscriminately at a crowd across from them. Dustil, who was fairly sure HK had just eradicated more Sith than Dustil had in this entire battle, would have ignored him completely, if not for what he had just said. "_What_?"

"Repetition." There was a note of irritation in the droid's voice. "The small blue meatbag is not on the ship."

"Z said she's on the Hawk," he insisted, taking shelter behind HK as the droid reached for a flamethrower.

"Observation: you meatbags are extremely obtuse." HK flipped on the flamethrower's switch, eyes lighting up with neon red enthusiasm. Dustil quickly situated himself behind the droid, having little confidence in HK's desire, if not ability, to aim. "Extrapolation: I observed the small blue meatbag leaving the ship while wearing her stealth device approximately one standard hour and nineteen minutes ago."

_Oh, shit._

"Do you know where she is?" he demanded, flinging out a hand to force back a mob of Sith. Somehow he and HK had ended up back to back. There was no sound from the droid for a moment, and then a _whoosh_ of flame erupted, sending up a wall of fire for a good fifteen feet in front of the droid. The heat was immense: under the armor, Dustil was fairly sure any hair on the back of his neck had just been fried off.

"Exclamation: wither and burn, meatbags!" he heard from behind him, and the _shuck_ of the flamethrower reloading. "Statement: I have no knowledge of where the small meatbag is, and neither do I care…"

Dustil stopped listening, scything his way away from the droid. Behind him, the flamethrower hissed like a basilisk, and somewhere in the Star Forge, Mission was probably doing something really stupid.

* * *

It was quiet.

_Quiet_. It took Ashi a moment to absorb it. There was no Malak waiting here. In fact, there didn't even seem to be anyone…

No, there was someone.

She reached for her lightsaber, but Bastila didn't even seem to be aware of her. Ashi took a couple hesitant steps out of the elevator, eyes never wavering from the small blotch of black and white at the foot of the map. Bastila was sitting in meditation, head bowed and eyes closed, but it seemed a fairly major design flaw for her to be so out of it as to not even notice Ashi. Besides, Battle Meditation meant influencing the people around you—which meant Bastila had sensed her, she was just pretending she hadn't.

"Bastila."

She didn't move. Ashi rolled her eyes.

"I know you can hear me."

In response, if not a willing one, Bastila shoulders tensed, rising fractionally. Ashi took a couple steps closer again. Caution made her reach for her lightsaber, and she clenched it tightly as she continued into the room. The closer she got to Bastila, the more details leapt out at her: a new bruise on the girl's cheek, faint salty lines running from her eyes, the way she took a little gasp of breath with Ashi's every footstep.

But even as the distance between them closed, Bastila seemed unwilling to even acknowledge Ashi. Her eyes squeezed shut, hands curling into fists against her legs. Ashi stopped a couple feet away, eyeing the girl suspiciously.

"You're an awful actress," she declared finally.

Bastila ducked her head, hair falling across her face. When she spoke, it was in a rough whisper, barely audible over the hum of the map behind her.

"If I were braver," she mumbled, "I'd tell you to do it."

Ashi glanced towards the lightsaber in her hand, back towards the ex-Jedi. "If I were you, I wouldn't need to be told."

"Are you better than I am?"

"Less stupid," Ashi offered, cocking her head to the side. "I'm not sure, other than that."

The corner of Bastila's mouth twitched, as if she'd tasted something sour and was trying to hide it. "You don't trust me," she observed. "You still have your lightsaber."

"Do I need it?"

The question hung in the air like glass, ready to shatter without anyone to catch it as it fell. Finally Bastila breathed in, long and slow. Her eyes closed even more tightly, as floodgates forcibly holding back tears.

"They said… he said I'd be powerful," she mumbled. "And… and that was what I wanted. He told me about how I'd been held back—how I'd get everything I deserved now." Her hands tightened, the joints and bones standing out in ridges against her skin. "It made… so much _sense_," she said softly. "You understand—don't you? When they tell you? It sounds right."

_"…__We have a simple plan." She crossed her arms, smiling at the Jedi before her as she tossed her hair over her shoulder. She wasn't wearing her Jedi robes anymore, but real armor, Echani weave, and she loved the way it felt on her skin: rough and dangerous and alive. She was a new Revan, not Jedi but General. "We're going to do what the Jedi are afraid to do, and what the people need us to do. Our mission," she murmured, eyes dark and vividly serious, "is to save the galaxy, by any means necessary." _

_She stopped, gaze moving deliberately over the group of recruits before her. "I said," she repeated, raising her voice, "_by any means necessary_. Do you understand?"_

"_Yes!"_

_She raised an eyebrow. "Just, yes?"_

_There was a pause, and then someone offered, "Frack, yes!"_

_She grinned at the speaker: Malak, smirking because he knew he'd said exactly the right thing. He flicked a lock of shaggy blond hair out of his eyes, raising an eyebrow. "You hear him?" she demanded, turning to the Jedi—_her_ Jedi. "You hear Alek? Listen to him—because he knows what he's doing!"_

_And then she couldn't make herself heard, because they were cheering too loudly…_

..."Yeah," Ashi agreed softly, blinking a couple times. Faces swam in her mind alongside the echoes of applause, like ink stains blurring but refusing to fade, and she focused purposefully on Bastila. "I know what you mean."

"It sounded… so _right_," Bastila whispered. "I had a purpose. I was _born_ for this!"

Ashi shook her head. Her lightsaber slipped lower, no longer seeming so necessary. "People don't get born for things," she corrected. "They're just born. Why is up to them."

Bastila swallowed hard, and, despite all her efforts, a tear ran down her cheek, curving around her lips and dissolving onto her chin. She opened her eyes, lifting them to look at Ashi. They were a strange color, somewhere between gold and grey, and shining like frozen suns.

"I'm not strong," she mumbled, lips barely moving. "Not really. There's too much anger in me—I won't be able to find peace again, like before. And the Council!" she blurted, eyes widening as it occurred to her. "They won't take me back, not after everything… everything…" She broke off, choking on a sob and the word _Juhani_.

"Come _on_." Despite herself, Ashi couldn't help rolling her eyes. "Seems to me they're pretty forgiving about people trying to take over the galaxy these days."

"You were a special case," replied Bastila. "They needed you to find the Star Forge. They don't need me. No one needs me now—"

"Not true," Ashi interrupted, shaking her head slightly. She'd usually be the last one to fuel the princess's ego, but this was a necessary exception—not to mention, as far as she was concerned, the first and last time. "You've been holding off the entire fracking Republic, Bastila. We're not going to win this fight without you on our side." Not even considering the motion, she flicked off her lightsaber, tucking it into her belt as she knelt down next to the girl. "_We_ need you, Bastila."

Frack—there was definitely something wrong with her when she was referring collectively to herself and the Republic. Ashi was wondering if she needed sleep more badly than she'd thought when Bastila spoke again.

"I'd need to stop this first," she observed. It was the first thing she'd said that didn't sound pitiful, or come with audible tearstains. "I…" She stopped, biting the tip of her tongue as if breaking off a flow of words. Her eyes rose back up to Ashi, pleading now. "Can I?"

Space, when had the princess become so_ insecure? _Bastila had killed Juhani, and by all rights she should be an enemy, but she looked so impossibly pitiful right now.

Even be that as it was, though, it still wasn't a question Ashi could answer, even if she wanted to. Instead, she shrugged. "That's not a question you can ask someone else."

"I think… I want to help you. The Republic, I mean." Bastila hesitated—for the first time, Ashi seemed distracted, almost completely unfocused. "Ashi?"

"I… yeah," Ashi muttered, closing her eyes. The memories, creeping forward like lengthening shadows, were shoved mentally away, slammed them into a drawer in the back of her mind. "_Space…_ I mean, yes, Bastila," she repeated—the girl had started to give her a distinctly worried look. "Headache," she declared, well aware it was among the most pathetic lies she'd ever told. "I think that's exactly what you should do, Bastila."

The ex-Jedi—ex-Sith?—gave a tentative smile. "Thank you," she murmured. "And… he's on the top floor."

There was no need to ask who _he_ was. Ashi turned for the elevator Bastila gestured to, composed for a moment, but then cried out as she took a step. An image so vivid it seemed suddenly more real than the world around her blocked her vision, and she stumbled, crumpling to the ground on her hands and knees...

… _A group of Jedi, Bastila in the lead, was standing at the entrance of a room, and had just struck down a dark Jedi. He keeled over, and their attention turned to Ashi. She took them in calmly, although she couldn't see as well as usual, her vision obstructed by some kind of mask over her face._

_**Fools.**_

_A thought was sudden and harsh, in a voice like hers but not quite her own, and followed by more like it. Except… except that was what it had been like then, and now Ashi heard it blurrily, as though the entire memory were overrun with static. Corners of her mouth turn up in a smirk… glance down at her hand, gloved in black, as the lightsaber in her fingers ignites, showing a blood-red beam. Instinctively, she swings it in a complicated form, strikes a stance._

_**Come on, Jedi**__—motion the group forward—__**see what it's like to fight a real warrior….**_

_And then the world exploded…_

_She was thrown forward: heat, fire, light, blackness, sharp, pain pain pain…_

_**I'm going to die,** _**_h_**_**e killed me, but… no, but I don't want to, not like this…**_

_**Please…**_

...Bastila let out a yelp as Ashi collapsed, scrambling over to where she'd fallen. Ashi's breath was coming sharp and erratic, and Bastila grabbed her shoulder, jerking her friend up to look her in the eyes. For a moment, there was no recognition in Ashi's gaze, just Bastila's own frantic face reflected back at her in the glassy blue, but then Ashi blinked, taking a trembling breath. When she reopened her eyes, the lucidity was back, but, Bastila suspected, not all of it.

"Ashi?" she demanded. "Ashi, what's wrong?"

Not even seeming to hear her, Ashi pulled away. Bastila saw her wince as she stood, one hand grazing her back for a moment; it took the younger girl a moment to realize that that was where her scar from two years ago was. "Nothing," Ashi muttered, looking away. "I tripped."

"Ashi!" Bastila reached out, grabbing Ashi's arm, and her friend turned in half-surprise. "You're not fine," Bastila breathed. She could still sense through the bond, hard as she knew Ashi was trying to block it, and there was something wrong with Ashi's mind, something fraying and unbalanced. "Ashi, I can feel it"—she waved a hand towards her temple, implying the bond—"there's something wrong. You can't go fight if it's this bad—"

"Don't." Eyes going frigid, Ashi pried Bastila's fingers off, half-pushing her away. "Bastila, please, just… just let me take care of myself."

"But…"

"No," she snapped, cutting her off. "Look, Bastila, there's no time. You've got to help the Republic out—they're not going to win this otherwise." She fixed her friend with a look that almost made Bastila cringe: whether or not it was quite rational, there was something almost frightening in her face. Determination? The younger girl wasn't sure, and wished she were better at reading people. "I'll take care of myself," Ashi said softly, and there was an edge in her voice that made Bastila unable to argue.

Instead, she settled slowly into her meditation form, crossing her legs and setting her hands on her knees. Her eyes, however, kept flicking to Ashi as she crossed towards the far door. Mid-step, she paused, and then turned back to Bastila. There was a wry grin on her face, the kind of humor that was never really funny.

"Hey, and princess?" she called. "If… when the whole place starts to blow?"

Bastila pressed her lips together, meeting Ashi's gaze. "Yes?"

Ashi waved a hand without looking, and the door opened in front of her. "Then run," she instructed, sounding suddenly (_frighteningly_) serious, and then turned through the door.

* * *

**Not over, merely separated into two chapters for your convenience. Italicized parts are flashbacks on Ashi's part (which I'm sure you knew, but just in case...)  
**


	33. Showdown, pt II

**Part II. **

_Self-explanatory..._

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* * *

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**Showdown (cont.): ****1. ****the laying down of one's cards, face upward, in a card game, esp. poker; ****2. ****a conclusive settlement of a difference in which all resources and power are used

* * *

**

Dustil was no longer sure who to be the angriest at: Mission, for sneaking off the ship, HK-47, for _telling_ him Mission wasn't safe at all, the Sith, for being the whole reason Mission was in danger in the first place, or himself, probably equally responsible. He was reasonably sure the latter was the honest option, but was settling for taking it out on the Sith, and meanwhile keeping his gaze hyper-tuned for any flash of blue.

The Force definitely had a messed-up sense of humor, because there was a _frack_-load of blue on the Star Forge.

It was funny, though: fighting, like he was fighting now, he'd fallen into a rhythm, the motions occupying only a fraction of his mind right now. The main advantage of this was that it freed up a considerable amount of space for thinking. Mission, he had long since realized, wouldn't be looking for a fight if she were wearing her stealth belt. She'd want to find something to do where she could be useful, somewhere empty and preferably with a computer.

So. Dark hallways, separate from the fight, with computer consoles. He could find one of those.

Actually, there were a lot of dark hallways on the Star Forge, but significantly less empty ones, as Dustil quickly found. However, there was exactly one lesson he'd learned that correlated between Sith and Republic morals, and that was the value of persistence. Mission was in trouble, and he _wasn't _going to give up.

And it was about to pay off.

With his best attempt at shielding—nothing incredible, just enough to keep from attracting followers—he ducked down a passage. His lightsaber was up, and he moved slowly, eyes darting back and forth as they struggled to make out the still-shady corners and end of the hall. Some son-of-a-schutta Builder had installed what seemed to be motion-sensitive guns down the length of every wall, along both the ceiling and floor, and he was waiting for one to fire at him.

None came, though. Weird. He took another shuffle forward, and his toe collided with something that felt like a knee-high rock. Hissing in pain as he clutched his foot, Dustil looked down to find a turret pointed at him. Horror was his immediate instinct, but the gun neither moved nor blew off his face, and after a moment he realized that a neat blaster hole had been sniped straight through its main section.

Oh, he was _definitely _on the right track.

He took a couple steps down the hallway, his eyes slowly adjusting even to the phantom shadows from his lightsaber. Slowly, he began to walk, putting one foot pointedly in front of the other. He didn't glance back to watch the doorway's light fading behind him—it would only freak him out, and to what end? What was he going to do, get lost in a straight hallway?

But barely had he thought that than he took another step to find his path ending, the hall forking in opposite directions to the left and right. _Damn_. He snuck a careful glance to either side. There didn't seen to be anything there…

Then he blinked, head snapping back to the left fork. For a moment he thought he heard…

There it was again. He cocked his head, and then stiffened: a sound was coming from the dark hall, a soft but ever-louder pattering that was almost definitely…

Oh, yes.

Footsteps.

And then, just as he squinted down the hall for a flash of blue—_oh Force, oh please, oh please_—a brilliant turquoise something hit him like a brick wall.

"Mission!" he exclaimed, grabbing her into an awkward hug as he tried to balance the lightsaber. Instinctively, it looked like, her headtails reached out for him, curling along his neck—surprisingly soft and warm—but then she tugged back, shoving night-vision goggles up onto her forehead.

"We've"—she paused, panting for breath and grabbing his hand—"got to _go_."

"What?"

"No—time," she continued between breaths. "I was—hacking the system—backup security loop—activates droid—_really big_… come on!" She yanked at his hand, tugging him in the direction he'd just come. "Run! This thing will—_eat you alive_!"

There was, indeed, an evil-sounding _thunk_ing coming from the dark corridor, a metal-on-metal cacophony that should have frightened him, but Dustil shook his head. He had found her, and goddamn it, he was going _protect_ her too. "It can't be _that_…" he began, drawing himself up taller, but the word _big_ died on his lips as the _thunks_ stopped, and his lightsaber flashed off gleaming red metal.

It was the droid equivalent of a young rancor, right down to the size. Wicked claw-arms glowed in the light, as did two bright red eyes. This was the potential offspring of HK-47 and an elephant, and Mission was absolutely right: it looked completely capable of eating them both alive.

"Running sounds good," he breathed.

The droid, as if it heard and disagreed, swiped for them with a limb like a tree trunk, and they _ran_.

It took off after them, the sound like an avalanche. It was fast, much faster than either of them on their own, and Dustil tightened his grip around Mission's wrist. "Hold on!" he barked over the storm of sound, and then he reached for the Force, fumbling as the energy seemed to dance out of reach. He grabbed for it, feeling it spark inside him—or at least, he thought he did; it might just have been his lungs burning—and forced it outward, through his muscles.

Suddenly he leapt forward, the equivalent of his feet having sprouted wings. Beside him, Mission yelped and then whooped, laughing wildly. Wind was whipping at his face, and behind him the clanking was growing fainter…

With no warning, the world tilted under his feet, the entire hall jarring with a massive shudder. His speed allowed him no time to react, and he slammed against the wall, his shoulder feeling like it had been shattered completely. Mission stumbled into him, and for a moment they were tangled on the ground, a pile of frantic limbs. The droid's _clank_ing steps were growing closer again.

Gritting his teeth, Dustil tugged himself up, forcing Mission behind him—she made no protest. The droid was coming, a wall of steel racing for them, and the Force was slipping out of reach. _Frack it_… He snatched for it, but it trickled through his fingers. The droid was five seconds away… four…

_Come _on_…!_

And suddenly he felt it, burning in his muscles, a new, raw energy. His hands closed on the air, but there was something tangible in it, a handhold only he could feel. He lifted his hands, as the droid raised an arm…

Dustil flung his hands outward at the moment the claw came down. He felt the blow in his bones, the weight of it forcing him to his knees; behind him, flat on the floor, Mission shrieked in horror. He curled over, hands over his head, a feeble protection in anticipation of the next blow. The arm came down again…

But… didn't hit him.

Dustil opened one eye, and then immediately the other, hardly able to believe it as he stared up. A film of blue light surrounded him and Mission, and though the droid swung at it, his claws ricocheted off like rubber. A smile widened on Dustil's face, incredulity fading to delight. The droid hammered in frustration, and, bracing himself, Dustil stood, forcing the shield outward. When the monster stumbled back, he smirked outright. Behind him, Mission's amazement was a near-tangible thing.

"Is that _you_…?" she demanded, and he grinned, drawing one hand back. He had no idea where the energy had come from, but it was in his blood now, something more mental than adrenaline and twice as electrifying. The Force was swelling inside him, a kind of power he'd never known before, and as the droid raised both claws, he drove his hands outward, letting the energy go.

The droid flew down the hall, out of sight completely. A couple seconds later, there was a splintering crash, followed by a burst of light. Then the dark rushed back in, and Dustil stared, slowly dropping the shield.

"Whoa," he breathed.

There was silence, which Mission finally broke.

"That," she announced, "was the coolest thing _ever_."

He laughed weakly. "How about we never do it again?"

At that, Mission nodded instantly. "Deal," she blurted, and he chuckled, turning to offer her a hand.

Just as she began to pull herself up, however, the entire station seemed to lurch, swaying giddily on its foundations. Mission stumbled sideways, and he helped her up quickly, eyebrows furrowing nervously. "The Republic's attacks are getting through," he guessed, and Mission's eyes went wide.

"We need to get back to the Ebon Hawk," she finished, taking hold of his wrist. When he blinked in surprise, her eyes flashed mischievously. "Y'think you can do that crazy running thing again?"

In spite of himself, Dustil grinned. "You got it," he replied and, pocketing his lightsaber and gripping her arm, he began to run again.

* * *

The Dark Lord heard Revan coming in behind him, the opening door announcing her arrival in a whisper. Footsteps the only sound in the massive space save the soft hum of electricity, she took a couple steps into the room, but then stopped, and half of him swelled with satisfaction. She was intimidated—already, he had the upper hand, and he hadn't even spoken yet. The other half didn't want to turn at all, to see her standing there and have to draw his lightsaber, but necessity made him glance back and smile. _Another enemy. It's only another battle_.

"Bra-_vo_," he said, and because he couldn't smirk he spoke with deliberate complacency. "Seems there's more of you left there than I thought, Red." The instant the name came out he told himself it had been to hurt her—but, inwardly, reminded himself sharply to hold old habits in check.

"Ditto," she replied readily. "Seems to be about as much of you as there was last time, Al."

It might have come off apathetic, even cautious, if not for her lifting a finger to graze her jaw as she spoke. The meaning couldn't have been clearer. "Very funny," he snapped. "Proud of your handiwork, Revan?" His hand reached for his belt, fingers dancing near his lightsaber just in case.

"I'm not proud of any of it," she growled. She'd seen him move, and apparently had decided to screw subtlety, taking hold of her blade. "What about you, Al? You happier now that you've got a big factory and a durasteel face?"

"Brave words," he sneered. "What do you have to speak of now? A galaxy that hates you? The Jedi that lied to you? Maybe a Republic officer or two to screw?"

There was the reaction he'd wanted—more than discomfort, she looked genuinely thrown. "I've got my life," she snapped. "You're going to be wishing you had that pretty shortly."

Damn, he missed expressions sometimes: right now, he wanted nothing more than a smirk that would do justice to his words. "What life?" he wondered. "You don't mean the _light side_?"

Contempt dripped from the name, as if it weren't worth even the trouble it took to speak aloud. Ashi braced herself, gritting her teeth. She couldn't look at him—too many faces flashed through her mind with every thing he did, his slightest motion setting off avalanches of memories. She'd almost lost it completely when he mentioned 'her _handiwork_', the scene from years ago blotting out her vision for what had seemed to be a good couple seconds.

_Focus. Concentrate. He's not getting to you… _"If this is the dark side? Yeah," she replied defiantly, tilting up her chin. "The light side."

He laughed. It hit her like gunfire, every chuckle a bullet lodging between her ribs. "And you believe that?" he wondered. "You've never been able to keep to a side, Red. They're both there—dark and light—and just because the balance is leaning to one side now…" He paused, letting the moment stretch painfully before her, and the words sink in. "It's only a matter of time," he finished quietly, "before it tips back again."

"You're wrong."

"No," he disagreed softly, "I'm not. I'm the only person who can be _right_, Red. No one else knows you like I do." Oh, and the irony, because he could see clear distress now, flickering on her face like static, but he could feel himself straying too close to _affection_, losing the impassion from a moment ago. It was a dangerous line he was walking with these kind of comments, but to halt on the offensive was unforgivable, and so he forged on. "Savior," he listed, "conqueror, hero, villain: you're all of those, Revan, but in the end you are _nothing_. You don't belong to a side—you will forever stand alone, left with nothing to believe in."

"I believe in redemptions," Ashi countered. "How much do you know about that?"

The effort she was putting towards concentrating was almost growing painful. Frack it, she knew she was talking like every other brainwashed Padawan, but comebacks took too much effort she couldn't spare. Every other second it was a new Malak passing in front of her eyes—half the time, Alek, even—and every one hit her like a kick in the stomach.

And she'd been fighting for concentration for a while, too. It occurred to her that the conversation was bordering on long, with some surprise. She was opposed to start the fight for a thousand reasons (disorientation, clinging exhaustion, the fact that it was _him_…) but he'd been delaying just as much as she had.

There was nothing to say she wasn't reading too far into that. The only thing she knew for sure, unfortunately, was that the longer the conversation grew, the closer the fight came.

"Of course you do," he snapped. "What else do you have to believe? The only thing you have is luck that's kept you alive."

"Luck?" _Smirk—damn it, at least fake some confidence!_ "Still using that to mean skill? As in, it's 'luck' that I've always been better than you?"

"Aren't we _cocky_," he observed, hand curling around the hilt of his lightsaber. "I've been waiting for this fight. Everything's been leading us up to here, hasn't it? The apprentice, finally ready to defeat the master. The dark side, ready to triumph over the light."

"Hmm." Her fingers closed around her lightsaber with a faint prayer. "And I'm cocky? Pretty big words, considering it's _never happened before_."

"First time for everything," he hissed. Ashi could feel the fight drawing closer, like jumping off a cliff and watching the ground race up to meet you, a collision that scared her to hell but was impossible to stop.

"We'll see about that!" she replied, and—because she wasn't going to have any other advantages—she lunged.

He met her strike and forced her blade down, but she ducked under him, spinning around to the side and dragging him in a clumsy circle to keep up. He swiped at her and she dodged back, weaving around his swing. Force-speed was her second nature by now, and she'd barely even noticed she was drawing on it until he began to catch up. The flood of images in her mind, ludicrously, was almost helping: he hadn't changed as much as the thought and she knew what he was going to do next whenever he parried left like that, caught her blade from above and then swung low…

Duck—block—step back, swipe left—parry the counterattack…

And then he raised his blade, and she swiped in low and vicious, catching him across the ribs.

It wasn't a deep cut, but neither was it a flesh wound, and he cried out hoarsely, hand flying to his chest. Ashi froze, recoiling from the noise: no matter how much she told herself she'd just done the right thing, she was stabbing _him_. Blood was running through his fingers, impossible to tear her gaze from.

He followed her gaze, taking in the horror to her face, and to Ashi's shock, he began to laugh. He stumbled a step back, reaching out for a column set almost into the wall.

Not to brace himself, though, Ashi realized in an instant, as a line of red leapt suddenly from pillar to his hand. Her eyes darted to the column and she choked, nausea rising in her unabated. Suspended from rings of electricity, hanging by his hands and with his head lolling to the side, hung a Jedi she recognized vaguely from Dantooine. Wounds gaped along his skin, an impossible amount to survive; his eyes were white and unseeing, twitching back and forth in their sockets as though the desperate motion, a search for any means of escape, had become an incurable habit even after it didn't matter.

As she watched, the Jedi convulsed inward around the string of light running from his chest. His mouth opened slightly, a faint exhale, and then he went abruptly limp. His eyes had stopped moving.

"Impressed?" wondered Malak quietly. There was a gash in his armor, but below it the skin might as well never have been touched. For a moment Ashi could barely find a response. The Jedi—and not just this man; she saw more everywhere she looked—weren't actually dead, then, even though everything said they should be.

Malak wasn't letting them die. They should be gone by now, should at least be allowed to rest in peace, but he'd even taken that from them. Had she been that cruel?

Bad phrasing. That _cruel,_ yes. But that kind of brutality… at least _she'd_ let them die. Eventually.

_Calm down. You're not fazed. It doesn't even bother you. _"Sucking life out of captive Jedi?" She snorted, nose wrinkling in distaste. "It's been done before."

"Nine lives left, Revan," he replied, flourishing the lightsaber. "How many do you have?"

"Question," she retorted, "is how many do I need?"

"Only takes _one_!" he snarled, rushing towards her. He swung towards her left side, blade a barely visible blur of crimson, but she'd seen the blow coming—he always attacked from his right first. She leant back and around, the lightsaber cleaving the air above her head, and threw out her hands, the Force behind them. He went flying back into a wall, staggering forward to his knees, and she grinned.

_Nine lives? We'll see about that._

She reached out into the Force, and the world shifted instantly—the room was shot through with red and black, swirling darkness that congregated around Malak and his many captive corpses. Only two colors seemed to exist any more… but for a startling amount of blue amidst the violet around herself. Damn—so much for being a Gray Jedi.

She turned instantly to the would-be corpse. It hung suspended in chains of electricity, eyes again open and pupils the same dull white. Through her Force-vision, both outside and within, the body ran with coils of darkness—not red, but a ravenous emptiness, more like a black hole than a color. Sparks of feeble blue tried to shine out along the skin, a desperate parry, but for every glimmer of light was a surge of the shadow to engulf it.

Ashi raised a hand, fingers curled, and concentrated, feeding power into the body. In the middle of the writhing scarlet aura, a white spark appeared, and then magnified, catching onto her Force. Slowly, painfully, she extended her fingers, and as she did, the spark grew. Blue lit within the darkness, and it shrank back as if in pain. Ashi threw her hand out suddenly, and the entire prison exploded.

Shards of metal and glass flew at her, a thousand tiny knives, and she raised an arm in defense, but felt a spray of cuts scatter her face nonetheless. The corpse, finally free from its chains, motionless collapsed to the ground.

_But still. Just eight lives now. Ashi, one; Malak, none._

Suddenly she sensed him flying towards her, and she didn't need to turn and look to feel the pure rage flying off him like sparks from a fire. Twisting her arm behind her back, she met his blade with her own, and then spun around to come face to face with him.

Even as she did, her arms shook ever so slightly. Destroying the prison wasn't hard, but the concentration it had taken had allowed the memories to build, and they collapsed onto her like a falling sky as she fought off his strike. Malak's eyes flashed eagerly.

"You're weakening, Revan."

"Great," she snapped. "Cut my jaw off, and we might be even."

He snarled, pushing harder against her blade, but she held her side stubbornly. "I am stronger!" he snarled.

"You can't beat me," Ashi scoffed. "You could never beat me!"

He roared with anger and pulled back, before sweeping a blow at her neck. Again she countered his attack, and their blades crossed, putting their faces inches apart.

"See?" she continued. A tirade of memories flickered through her mind as if caught in a hurricane, but she smirked through them. "Scared yet, _Dark Lord_?"

"I don't fear you, Revan," he growled.

Ashi was breathing hard through gritted teeth, but she managed a fierce grin. "Well, maybe you _should_!"

She spun away and ducked back, letting Malak stumble in surprise. There was a sudden, unexpected energy pulsing through her, and riding its wake a wicked confidence. With a jolt, she distinguished Battle Meditation at work, and gave a grim smile. They were winning.

Emboldened by the thought, she kicked out, low and hard, and her boot connected with Malak's stomach. He staggered back, throwing out a spread-fingered hand as he did. Ashi didn't realize what he had done until it was too late, and the prison behind her exploded. A burst of fire, shrapnel caught in its wake, threw her into the air, but there was no time to do anything more than acknowledge the pain. As she hit the ground, she twisted and rolled, springing back to her feet in time to meet his follow-up. Her ankle cried out, but she gritted her teeth, ignoring it. Healing took too long—she'd likely never have time to regret a second wasted right now.

_So he's only got seven lives… but I have a bad foot. About even, I think._

Thinking it over, almost narrating to herself, was helping. If she was focused on that, she had something occupying her mind beside the memories, like every word was a brick in the dam. Once she got out of here, surely they'd go away again. It was only Malak she had to survive.

He swung at her, and she stumbled, ankle twisting to the side and sending a flash of pain along her leg. She bit her lip to avoid making a sound, but Malak watched her lurch slightly and saw anyway. Eyes crinkling in what would have been a smile, he lunged in to her weak side, and she barely managed to dodge. She needed a second's pause to heal if he was taking advantage of this.

He took a double-handed swing, the blade flashing in towards her weak side, and she took a deep breath…

And jumped.

She flew through the air, missing his swing as it cut through the air and landing, only with a slight stumble, on the ledge above. There was barely more than a foot's room between the window—a giant pane staring out over the universe and rolling, fiery surface of the star below—and a ten-foot drop back to the floor. Below stood Malak, eyes narrowing in fury. He bent to jump, and she sucked in a quick breath, feeling her ankle shift into place—not perfect, but a slight improvement. Then he landed, with an eerie, silent kind of grace, and she braced herself.

He darted forward first, lightsaber a blur of red cleaving for her shoulder, but she forced him back, taking an advantage in speed that she wouldn't have in strength. Sparks exploded against the plexiglass next to them, marking ghost-line scars on the crystalline surface, and beside them, reflections fought backwards but in perfect imitation.

In all honesty, it had been a stupid place to jump. He had every advantage with pure muscle, and there wasn't room for dodging and tricks on a foot-wide ledge. She was keeping an eye out for a second to make a quick escape, but he knew he had the upper hand, and was using it to the fullest. The extra aid of Battle Meditation—which she'd have to thank Bastila for later, hopefully—helped with the worst of it, but she wasn't by any means on the offensive, only slipping in feeble slashes along his arms that hardly grazed him.

As if it wasn't bad enough, the flashes of memory were getting worse. She still knew his attacks almost before they happened, but she could hardly recognize which Malak was swinging towards her any more. Maybe it was exhaustion, but the entire Star Forge was slowly starting to feel less real, fading into a collage of pictures she'd collected before. It was like flipping through a photo album, watching a thousand different pictures merging into a single motion. He'd always been a good fighter, she thought foggily.

But… but she'd been good at lots of other things.

He swung left…

_Faked left, that's a fake, he always goes right on these…_

She shifted right instead, catching him a second from her throat, and grinned. She was good at _plenty_ of other things, and tactics were right up there. "Any new tricks instead, Al?"

He darted forward, sparing no time for words, but she parried him away again. Her mouth had curled into a deliberate smirk. "See?" she continued. "_Old._ Still so sure you can beat me?"

"Quiet!" he snarled, and it was at that moment she knew she'd got him. Maybe he had brute force on his side, but she'd always been smarter, cleverer, and, if she was being completely honest with herself, crueler.

"Calm down, Al," she replied, biting back a grunt of effort as she blocked his blow. The Force she'd tapped into was rising inside her, waves slamming against a dam and begging to be freed. "Not like losing's going to be anything new. At least you're used to it by now, right?"

The Force was swelling like a tidal wave, nearly painful in its aching to be set free. New energy was pounding through her, sharpening her senses until in another setting it would have been overwhelming. Roaring in anger, he came rushing at her, no longer wary of the narrow ridge or its drop, and she snapped her hands forward. The surge of energy came flooding outwards, slamming into him and throwing him against the edge of the window.

He dropped like a stone, slamming against the ground, but she couldn't—not didn't want to, but physically _couldn't_—stop to pay him attention. The energy was still coursing inside her, begging to do something, and she couldn't have held it back; it would be like trying to hold back the ocean. Instead she spun, Force-vision slipping over her eyes and immediately setting the remaining seven corpses glowing with their dark, sick gravity. She raised a hand, not so much aiming the energy as hopefully channeling it, and let go.

Six explosions—or, as seemed more accurate, a single massive one—shook the room. For a moment, Ashi stumbled against the side of the window, grabbing at the smooth metal rim to hold her on her ledge. Ten feet below her, the dark, once-spotless metal of the floor was covered in glass and shrapnel, charred with the fiery scars. The Jedi had fallen to the ground in small, pale heaps of brown robes and bloodless skin, finally set free.

Malak groaned, lifting a thick, gloved hand from where he'd thrown it to protect his face. There was a horrible burn on his leg, which had been closest to one of the corpses; his entire calf was a mess of scorched armor and skin, welling up with shocking scarlet blood.

He glanced around, as if still expecting there to be another life left to fix his leg and the inevitable broken_ something_, but they were gone. Ashi, still clinging to the edge of the window, loosened her grip slightly, waiting for the storm to break this calm. Below, tried to pull himself to his feet, but his hand flew instinctively to his chest as he stood, and he was favoring his unhurt leg. There was a kind of involuntary fixation in his eyes, like a wounded dog struggling to finish its hunt nonetheless; a glance at his face told her immediately he was going to try and fight anyway. Slowly, she shook her head.

"Don't, Alek."

His eyes narrowed. "Sith don't surrender."

"Well, Sith do a lot of stupid things."

"This is a trick," he growled, hate filling his golden stare. "I'm _not_ falling for your tricks any more, Revan!"

He crouched and then leapt, landing on the ledge with significantly less grace this time. Ashi held up the lightsaber warily, still shaking her head.

The motion seemed to infuriate him; he leapt forward, almost flailing at her with his blade. She blocked every swing, pity and two decades of history dragging at her in equally unbearable amounts. Every swing was fracturing his ribs more, and he couldn't balance on his hurt leg, but he appeared to sense her near-sympathy, and Ashi suspected it only made him angrier.

"Please," she hissed, blocking a wide swing to the side. "Please, Al, just stop!"

"I _can_ defeat you!" he snarled. "You're not going to win!"

Gritting her jaw in a show of defiance, she lowered her lightsaber guardedly. "You're right," she replied. "I'm not, because I'm not going to fight you."

He took a couple steps back. "You have to fight!" he protested, sounding thrown. "This… this is the way it must be, Revan!"

"There isn't a way it must be," she replied. "Just how you decide it should be." She bit the edge of her tongue, almost not daring to say it, before blurting, "And I think it's Red, to you."

Suddenly he was the little boy from Dantooine again, with a name too long and legs too gangly for him. Surprise registered in his small face, followed by the reflexive awareness that he'd made a mistake and the scramble to correct it. Then it was Malak again, and she watched the war of intentions across his face, the urge to fight but inability to strike against her when she refused to stop him.

Outside the ship, Battle Meditation was having its effects as well. The shields had fallen, and in a flash of red and fire on the part of the Republic, the orbital stabilizers shuddered and buckled, one after the other. A shudder like a convulsive gasp traveled the length of the Star Forge, and below, the leaping tongues of light from the star's surface seemed suddenly far more ominous.

But that was worlds away from Ashi: all she saw was Malak, still seemingly undecided as to whether he dared continue, and then a violent jerk threw her from the ledge. She was in the air for a moment, any sense of gravity lost, and then she hit the ground, a burst of fire flying over her head. Instinctively, she curled as she skidded across the ground, rolling and wrapping her arms across her face to protect it. The heat seared across her back, singeing Bandon's armor, and shrapnel peppered her shoulders, a couple pieces lodging in her scalp…

_An ambush… fire… she was going to die… Malak had done this to her…_

No, actually—this would be the_ second_ time friendly fire had nearly killed her now.

A moment, and then it was quiet. Ashi lay in a ball, curled against one of the railings where the blast had thrown her. Slowly, she unknotted her arms from around her face, rubbing one eye. A cut had slashed across her forehead, and blood was stinging as it dripped into her eye. She wiped it away haphazardly, sealing the cut closed with a brush of her fingertips over the skin. Moving a shaking arm carefully to her chest, she prodded it gingerly, flinching as a couple ribs proved to be broken. Smoothing her hand across the injured bones and concentrating, she felt them knit themselves together. A moment later she went limp, panting with effort. She glanced around frantically for her lightsaber, torn from her hand as she fell, but it was lying in a heap of rubble a few yards away.

She crawled over to tuck it into her belt, before standing tentatively. Her ankle, previously half-healed, had twisted nastily, and she couldn't manage to put any weight on it at all. She'd been wearing Bandon's dark gauntlets as well, so her hands hadn't been skinned as they broke her fall, but a couple of the fingers stuck out at odd angles. With a wince and a muttered curse, she straightened them carefully, rubbing fingers laden with Force over them to ease the ache.

There was no noise other than the barrage of attacks from outside and her own footsteps. Was Malak…?

A heap of red at the edge of her sight caught her eye. She spun, hand flying to her lightsaber and then falling just as quickly. There was no need for it.

One of the columns that had once held a Jedi, mangled from its previous destruction, had been left little but a skeleton, jutting spikes of warped metal. A single one of these spikes coated in liquid red, and on the ground next it was the would-be owner of the spreading pool of blood. His eyes were closed, and he was even paler than before.

She swore instinctively, but when he didn't move, panic began to move in to replace the shop. "Alek!" she cried, breaking into a run even though her ankle screamed in protest. "Alek… oh, frack, Alek, no…!"

She knew in a moment that she would never really have been able to fight him, that if ever she had finished it she wouldn't have been able to live with it. This wasn't a Dark Lord on the ground, even if he thought he was; it was really just Alek, her friend who'd saved her so many times, and who she had to save in return, if she even could…

"Alek!" She collapsed next to him, hand flying to his neck to check for a pulse. It was there, but slow, fading quickly—likely something to do with the blood spilling all over the ground.

His forehead wrinkled, as if deep in concentration, and then he opened an eye slowly. It was dim, as if the gold plating had begun to wear off the iris, and focused foggily on her, before narrowing in scrutiny. Ashi waited, half-anxious, for his comment, and at last he spoke, sounding matter-of-fact.

"You wouldn't have killed me… would you?"

He knew how to read her. Alek and herself, the only two people Ashi couldn't lie to. "No," she replied softly. "I couldn't."

He chuckled quietly, the noise surprising her. "You're just like you used to be," he whispered, looking almost entertained.

Ashi recoiled, hands clenching into fists at her sides. The words were like a verbal slap, one that had as little reason behind it as it did tact. "I'm not _Revan_," she snapped, glaring at him.

He shook his head slowly, mainly because faster motion seemed to prove too much for him. "No," he murmured. "You aren't. I…"

He broke off, wheezing for breath and then coughing convulsively. The sound, which seemed to break the other half of his ribs on its way up, made even Ashi flinch, but he spoke through it. "I didn't mean that," he whispered. "I… you're Red. Again. I think…"

He paused, searching for words. "You were yourself at the beginning," he explained carefully, eyes glazing over with a faraway expression. "Before… before everything. And then when we were in the war, and after… you changed. When you were a Sith, you weren't yourself any more. Now… now you're Red again."

She gripped his hand, squeezing tightly on his fingers. They were sticky with blood, but she wouldn't have let go for the galaxy. "Yeah," she agreed, blinking hard. "I am. And you're Al."

He gave a rusty laugh that turned into a wheeze. "I'm Malak. I can't change that. I haven't been able to start over like you." Suddenly, his eyes crinkled with the ghost of a smile. "What if it had been different?" he wondered, almost inaudibly. "If I'd had the chance to go back, like you did?"

Ashi smiled weakly. "Then you'd be a lucky son-of-a-schutta, is what."

"But it would have happened the same way, wouldn't it? You'd still win." He sighed, almost wryly. "Damn. You really are stronger."

A faint grin twitched at her lips. "Not really. Just a little smarter, Al."

"It wasn't me," he mumbled, almost to himself. His eyes had grown glassy, his gaze somewhere else. She wondered if he was remembering the same involuntary things as her. "It was never meant to be me, was it?" The question hung in the air, clearly rhetorical. "I wasn't meant to be… the Sith Lord. You could have, but… no." Feebly, he shook his head. "Never mind."

"Stop." She took a deep breath through her nose, steadying herself. "I can heal you. We're going to get out of here, and…"

"You can't heal me," he breathed, closing his eyes for a moment. "I'm dying, Red."

"Nothing that we haven't gotten around before."

"I'm _dying_," he repeated. "I want you to go. You need to leave before they destroy the Star Forge completely."

She bit her lip. Her eyes were beginning to sting, a layer of tears blurring her vision. His face flickered in front of her, first smiling and young, with blonde, shaggy hair, now pale and gold-eyed, with no smile to speak of for the last three years. "I'm not going to leave you here," she snapped.

"It's not a choice," he hissed. "You have to go. The Star Forge is going to collapse."

"So, _come_."

His eyes narrowed. "Please," he mumbled. "Go, Red."

It was the nickname, the last blow to her already dubious composure, that broke her. Ashi threw her arms around him suddenly, pressing her face against his neck. The motion, his proximity to her, was almost overwhelming in terms of the memories, but she struggled to push all of them aside—she owed it to him to remember everything right now. Weakly, he wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer.

"What about you?" she murmured into his neck. His skin was frighteningly cold, and the metal of his jaw pressed against her temple, icy to her skin. "Would you have killed me?"

He was silent, so long that fear had begun rise like bile in her chest, but at last he spoke. "I… should have," he replied, almost inaudibly. "But… with you, like this…"

She pulled away a couple inches, looking him in the eyes. With massive effort, he had focused on her. "No," he concluded. "I don't think I could have."

He paused, his chest shaking with the pain of drawing his next breath. Ashi hardly dared touch him, afraid to break him like glass if she so much as tightened her grip. She had too much to say: that it wasn't fair, that she hadn't wanted this, that she'd take everything back if she could. She wanted to tell him she loved him—not like a lover, not attraction, but more than that. She wanted to go on an adventure with him, and follow stupid impulses, and laugh about it later, and talk to him and have him understood exactly what she meant. She needed to tell him he was her best friend, that he would always know her better than anyone.

She didn't want anyone else to replace him. She wanted Alek back again, and he was the only one she couldn't have.

She wanted to tell him everything but, for once in her life, she couldn't find the right words. "I missed you," she finally settled on, knowing it was far from enough.

Alek gave a weak chuckle, more like a gasp of breath. "I love you, too," he replied, and somehow she wasn't even surprised. He always knew exactly what she meant. "Good luck… Red."

And his eyes slid closed.

Abruptly, the tears came, unbidden and unable to be helped. No longer needing to worry about being careful, she clung to him, feeling the saltwater drip off her face and down his neck. She'd lost her greatest enemy, but also her best friend, and it was an impossible pain—like a massive fist tightening on her chest, a thousand shards of broken glass stabbing from inside her ribs.

Shaking even worse than he had been, she pulled back, searching his face. It was nearly white, his cheeks bloodless, but there was softness to his expression: a peacefulness, like an insomniac who'd at last found sleep. For a moment, the thought soothed her. She liked that—he was at peace.

As if to contradict her, the station lurched, sending her nearly slipping sideways. Alek had been right: she had to leave, or the entire place was going to fall apart with her still in it. For a moment she hesitated, squeezing his rigid hand tighter and missing the warmth it had had so many years ago, and then pressed a kiss to his cheek. It was like ice, and the motion had a vivid sense of finality to it, like the toll of a funeral bell. _Goodbye, Al._

Folding his hand across his chest, she stumbled to her feet. The tears couldn't be helped, and neither could her probably-broken ankle, but she couldn't take time to worry about those. She lurched towards the elevator, tripping into a railing as the Star Forge shook on its supports again. Pictures were flashing, still, in front of her eyes: the two of them on Dantooine, the kinrath cave, all their fights—side by side and one against the other…

She slammed her hand on the elevator button, and the doors slid back instantly. She half-fell in, slumping against the wall, and her stomach jolted as the descent began. Still, it seemed she had only blinked, watching a hundred faces stream before her eyes, before they parted, hissing open again.

The massive room was empty. Had Bastila run? Ashi found herself surprised, but couldn't be upset, not if she'd told the girl to go herself. She made her way out into the room, her leg as useless as a block of wood but several times more painful. The ground was trembling under her feet, proof that the Republic really didn't care who was on board any more…

In front of her, the green map was wilting, shot through with ugly blotches of static. Pieces of the Star Forge's blueprint were flashing bright red, and words were scrolling across the image, announcing danger in several different languages. Ashi's foot jolted with every step, the pain enough to bring tears to her eyes had they not already in there, but despite it all, she almost made it to the other door before the explosion.

Nearly across the room, she turned instinctively as an alarm began to screech behind her. The map was flashing new words: _attack incoming. _In the window beyond, she could see Republic ships advancing, and bolts of red coming… straight for her…

When the map exploded, it seemed to bring the world with it. The flash of light and fire had blinded her, and so she never saw the shards of metal, torn up from the floor in the blast, flying towards her like a dark, deadly flock of birds. One caught her in the stomach and another across the face, ripping a stripe of red from her forehead to lip, but she never felt it. The Star Forge, the Republic, and even the memories were gone, swept away by an avalanche of black.

* * *

"…_Carth, we've got to get out of here, come on! Here, can someone help him…?"_

"_No! Bastila, stop, I've got her."_

"_Frack… Onasi, who's that? Is she…?"_

"_Force—look at her _face_…"_

"_Wait… Padawan Shan, that's not… _her,_ is it?"_

"_Stop! We don't have time for this—Carth, where's the Ebon Hawk…?"

* * *

_

"…_Massive internal damage here…"_

"_You've healed worse."_

"_But the tissue damage to her face… I don't know how much we can save."_

"_Then just save _her_…"

* * *

_

"…_talking to Dodonna, she says two days left to Coruscant."_

"_Lovely. Well, I've just been here with her since our last chat, like I have all week.." _

"_Frack. A _week_… Jolee, is she ever going to…?" _

"_I'm not sure, son…"

* * *

_

"…_but the awards ceremony's been postponed until she's better. Do we know if that's going to… you know, to be soon?"_

"_I'm not sure. The healers aren't even sure if she'll be able to survive this."_

"_Can't you… you know, use the bond to help her, or something?"_

"_I'm afraid it's not as simple as that. I'm locked out—she's in there on her own."_

"…_Well, I'll just tell Dodonna she's going to have to wait to give us the awards." _

"_Observation: at this point, it appears to be rather hopeful of them to plan to give her anything, doesn't it?"_

"_The frack… who asked you, droid?"_

"_Statement: I will have you know, could I feel such meatbag emotion, I would be equally distressed, Republic meatbag. It would be most inconsiderate of my master to die, and leave me in the possession of you lesser creatures."_

"_Don't see why you're even allowed into the hospital…"_

"_Carth, just ignore it…"

* * *

_

"_Ash… Ash, it's me. The doctors say maybe you can hear me, maybe… Ash, please wake up…"_

* * *

**It's not over. Believe me, if it was I would have been all intense about it. I'm talking:  
**

_**'FIN****' **_

******and stuff. There's one more chapter coming. Reviews, as always, are hugely appreciated-that and the prospect of summer are keeping me writing... X)**


	34. Transition

**It's been a hell of a long time coming. And it's long. So I won't make it even longer.**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own KotOR.

* * *

**

**Transition: passage or change; movement from one place or state to another**_**  
**_—_**Not an ending.

* * *

**_

Time passed differently when you couldn't see.

She wasn't just saying it, either. Every moment was longer, with the sort of isolation that came from a lack of sight; and, with no perception of daylight, she lost touch with any kind of body clock. The Force-vision—space thank Jolee—was becoming more and more natural, but it was far too easy to stop concentrating, and memories came when she did.

And they were growing worse, too. Ashi had assumed they'd stop after the Star Forge, or, at the least, ease as she healed, but they seemed only to grow stronger as she did. No longer were they second-long images, but full-on _blackouts_, lasting anywhere from half a minute to half an hour. One had put her out for over an hour the other day, and Mission, coming to visit, had thought she was in a coma again. It had been bad.

In fact, the whole situation was beginning to transcend something as ordinary as _bad_. And this wasn't exactly helped by the fact that she was on fracking _house arrest._

Head flopping against the head of the armchair, Ashi sighed angrily. Whole thing was fracked up, and it had all started—well, if she really thought about it, there were four things that had gone completely and irrevocably wrong.

The first was also the most obvious.

She was blind.

To say that she'd taken it badly when she woke up was an understatement. Ashi knew, without a doubt, that she would never forget opening her eyes and not seeing for the first time. Her first thought had been denial—_I've been caught by the Sith, or even the Republic; I'm in a dark room; they're just trying to scare me_—and the second, even worse, a faint whisper in the back of her mind wondering if this was what it was like to be dead.

Bastila had arrived first, having felt Ashi waking through the bond. The ex-Sith—or, alternately, semi-Jedi—had been overjoyed to see Ashi awake, just like all the doctors and Jedi who'd already come in to see her. Ashi let her talk at first, waiting for her vision to adjust with fading patience that quickly vanished. After a couple minutes, genuine fear had started to replace the confusion from her lack of sight. "Bastila," she'd interrupted, her voice like grating metal, "I… why can't I see?"

There was a pause, and then she'd heard a soft noise, halfway between a gasp and a sob. "Oh," Bastila breathed, and Ashi's heart took off.

"Oh?" she had hissed. "What do you mean, _oh_?"

Maybe it would have been easier for both of them if she hadn't had to ask.

When Bastila had tried to explain it to her, breaking the news gently, Ashi was well aware she couldn't have responded worse. For the first several minutes, the entire thing had seemed like a stupid joke, an impossibility. She wasn't blind. She'd be able to see again in a moment, and then she'd be fine. Yeah. Just a joke.

Bastila, in typical Bastila fashion, had been mumbling about '_irreparable core tissue damage_' and '_rehabilitative therapies_' when Ashi snapped. She'd shouted at her to leave, that it was a terrible joke, how it wasn't fracking _fair_ when she'd already done so much. Bastila had left almost in tears, and Ashi—in typical Ashi fashion—had declared she didn't want to see anyone.

By the time Jolee came anyway, she'd been wishing she'd just died on the Star Forge.

He'd probably—no, he'd _definitely_ saved her life with his idea.

Force-vision.

When he'd first told her, she'd tried to shoot down the thought before he'd even finished. That wasn't going to work, she'd interrupted; it was an _aspect_ of sight, not a replacement for it. He'd shrugged, however, refusing to be intimidated by the voice that had driven Bastila out of the room. "Of course it'll be different," he replied. "Just try it, lass. Unless you have a better idea?"

Obviously, she'd had to after that, because obviously, she didn't. And… in a way, they had both been right.

It wasn't as if she could see again, and it wasn't effortless in any way, but there were some things that, even in their new way, were almost the same. People were easy—auras took the shape of their bodies, each with a color she'd soon realized was fingerprint-unique, and she'd learned to read emotions in them almost as well as she'd been able to read faces. Jolee, for instance: when she'd first made out his aura—a deep, earthy green—coming into focus, it had flared with warmth, a rich delight perhaps even more wonderful to watch than a smile. You could fake expressions, but auras were vividly candid. That kind of sight, to be fair, was an ability Ashi didn't mind having.

Other things were harder, though. Instead of strands of the Force being superimposed over the world, they now stood alone. After a little while, though, she'd started to see patterns; objects began to stand out, in the way strands of light in the air curved and wove around them. Walls were still tricky, but she was beginning to adjust to this way of seeing. She could walk around without hitting things now, even at a normal pace, and she'd even managed a sprint recently…

Though that wasn't exactly because she'd wanted to.

But, joltingly, the implications of _blindness_ kept sinking in. She'd never really see again, and no matter how beautiful it was to watch the universe in motion around her, there was no replacement for the stars, or the city at night, or the faces of everyone she knew. Frack, she had to_ think_ about it to see where a wall was. This was miserable with a couple faint perks, but miserable nonetheless.

There were plenty of other things to depress her, though, if only she thought about it.

The second of these, at the risk of complete and utter vanity, was her _face_.

She knew there was something bad straight away to blind her, but this seemed to surpass _bad_. Concentrating, she could define a wound running from the right side of her forehead to the left corner of her lip. It was almost ironic, she registered wryly: Alek was dead, and she'd all but inherited his disfiguration—everything_ but_ her jaw was scar tissue now. Mix the pair of them together, and you'd get one normal face in total. The Force had a fracked-up sense of humor.

Shortly after she'd woken up—well, come to that, probably about a couple days later; thought it bothered her in retrospect, she had no way to know precisely—Bastila had visited. She'd been there to check in on Ashi, ask about the Force-vision, make sure she didn't seem suicidal yet. While she was talking, Ashi quietly took hold of the bond, worming her way into the back of Bastila's mind, and looked out through her eyes.

That was the part where she'd cursed aloud, nearly a shout, and Bastila had realized what was happening, shoving Ashi quickly into her own mind. It was too late. Ashi had gotten to see what her face looked like.

It was nightmarish, more scar tissue than skin. A dark, still raw-edged scar tore like a stripe down the middle of it, from above her right eyebrow—now almost nonexistent—to the corner of her left lip. The skin there was mottled and rough, like wax that had melted and reset strangely, and her nose was slightly crooked, as if it had been broken once too many times. Dark circles ringed both her eyes like long-cast shadows, juxtaposed by small white scars flecked like snowflakes across her forehead and cheeks.

In the middle of the debris, her eyes were clouded and eerie, like glass fogged by condensation. It took Ashi a moment to realize what she'd looked like, and the irony was almost too funny. She had the same expression as the blind Elders had.

"Ashi," Bastila had said softly, "it's not as bad as you think."

Oh, but it was.

The new Jedi hesitated. "If you're really upset about it, I'm sure that some kind of arrangements can be—"

"I want a mask," interrupted Ashi.

The declaration, only half a joke, was going to have repercussions for that very reason. The big names in the Republic, through a clandestine confession by the Council, had been informed who their great hero actually was, and intended to break the news to the rest of the galaxy _very_, _very carefully_. There was a line they didn't even dare to toe, and a mask was miles past the other side of it.

As soon as Ashi demanded to know why the Republic would care whether or not she showed her face anyway, the _third_ bad thing came to her attention.

The Republic—_bastards_—had interpreted 'Ashi's awake now' as 'Ashi's finally cooperating' and scheduled the awards ceremony. Ashi had instantly declined to attend. She didn't care about an award; why make a public appearance if she had to look like a gargoyle while she did it?

And there was the involuntary shudder that accompanied any suggestion of getting a medal for killing Alek. Ashi was fairly certain the Republic wouldn't be so eager to congratulate her if they'd been present at the fight, but considering how distrusful they were of her already, she kept silent about the memories and her opinion of Malak. Her face was her excuse not to go, she informed them—and no, she wouldn't be upset to miss it; the truth was, at this point, she really didn't care.

But everyone else did, replied Dodonna.

_Everyone else can screw themselves_, thought Ashi, and formally responded with something along the lines of 'I think they'll live.'

The galaxy wanted its hero, countered Dodonna, admitting finally, _Needed_ its hero.

Ashi understood—the Republic needed its propaganda—and, too tired to fight it, conceded. Sort of.

Some of them dressed up for the ceremony: Carth in Republic uniform, Dustil and Mission in armor, and Bastila in Jedi ceremonial robes. Canderous and Jolee hadn't bothered. Ashi had, in a manner of speaking, dressed for the occasion. No one had been able to stop her when she'd turned up, for lack of any better description, looking like a Miraluka. A cloak which she'd been informed was gray hung loosely around her, a large hood throwing her face into shadow. The shade cast extended almost to her lips, below which her hair spilled across her shoulders, the only flash of color to her figure. Beneath the hood, a layer of bandage was wrapped across her eyes and upper face, hiding the worst of the damage.

It was unsettling to feel her eyes covered and see nonetheless, but Force-vision wasn't to do with the eyes themselves, and it was the closest she'd get to a mask now. A couple of her friends had winced to look at her when she arrived, but Mission had raced to hug her, and Canderous had nodded approvingly. Finding some way to frack up the Republic's plans could never be amiss with him.

Ashi was almost beginning to think it might even… well, that it wouldn't be _awful_.

But even Dodonna hadn't seen the last and largest problem coming.

With a sigh, Ashi slumped back in the chair, letting the memory float to mind. At least thinking about this kept everything else at bay. It had been in front of a sea of at least four hundred auras, all surging and seething blues and purples, that Dodonna stood at a podium, and a ramrod-backed officer pinned the medals to their chests, one at a time. Each was met with tumultuous applause. They started at Carth—or, as they announced him, 'Commander Carth Onasi'—and moved steadily down the line. When they reached Ashi, they skipped her.

Ashi had frowned, and felt the soft bandages creasing against her face, but said nothing. Probably Dodonna had a special congratulation for her.

Or maybe they were just scared of her.

Ashi liked that option, and her lips curled into a smile under the hood of her cloak.

At last, however, the calling of names ceased—the last being T3-M4 and HK-47, by which time the applause had dwindled slightly. Dodonna cleared her throat, and Ashi saw her straighten, a new flush of color spreading through her aura. _Pride_, Ashi realized, with some surprise, _and gratitude_. There were few things the soldier could have said to win some of Ashi's trust at that moment, but, seeing that, Ashi found herself less angry at the woman. After all, the admiral been fighting a hell of a long time—if she considered it, Ashi even remembered a Captain Dodonna from back in the Mandalorian Wars. It was about time she had something from this war to brag about.

So when Dodonna again bent her head slightly to speak into the microphone, Ashi stood up straighter despite herself. "We have one last Cross of Glory to bestow today," said the admiral, her words echoing through the pavilion. "We have left this for last, as the final member of the Ebon Hawk's crew is perhaps the person we are most indebted to of all. She risked her life to defeat Malak"—here, Ashi's jaw tensed, but she bit back the reflexive reaction—"and destroy the Star Forge, bringing the Republic its single greatest victory of the war and irrevocably breaking the spirit of the Sith!"

Her voice rose, the intensity with it, until it boomed across the heads of the crowd. Cheers resounded through the air. Ashi lifted her head higher, conscious of the hood and her bandaged face and the cameras she'd been informed were in front of her. She thought that Dodonna made the entire thing sound more impressive than it had been.

"For this," Dodonna continued, her aura glowing like flames leaping higher, "I am proud to present the final Cross of Glory, the highest honor the Republic can bestow, on Ashi Luc—"

Ashi sensed the group of five approaching from behind her mostly because of their auras—they shone dark, unusual indigos, tossing and turning frantically. She forced her vision to narrow towards them, scrutinizing them even as she stood straighter in front of the cameras. They stood in the wings, just outside the view of the audience, and she suppressed the urge to turn and look, knowing it wouldn't help.

And then, cutting Dodonna off with no warning, all five people came charging towards her.

Ashi hadn't moved, more from disbelief than from inability to have dodged, but two bodies rammed straight into her, sending her sprawling to the ground. A hand tightened on her arm and she kicked out, catching someone in the stomach. Her foot connected with armor, but sent someone reeling back nonetheless, swearing loudly.

Suddenly, half the audience was on their feet. Dodonna had pulled back from the microphone and was shouting angry, incomprehensible words as Ashi scrambled to her feet. Canderous, Jolee, and Carth had grabbed for weapons they weren't supposed to have brought, and one of the five attackers raced towards each of them, fumbling for possession of the blasters and lightsaber alike. Even though all the motion was visible to Ashi, however, she could take in only fractions of it. Both the man she'd kicked in the stomach and his free companion were advancing on her. She broke into a run, heart racing more from fear of sprinting blind than from the action.

A hand grabbed her cloak, jerking it tight around her neck. Ashi, not pausing even to consider, slipped the robe off, the hood falling free from her face. A couple of the spectators gasped, but Ashi was distracted as from behind her came a curse, and then a roar. The familiar blue-green aura of Zaalbar—newly laced through with scarlet—descended on one of the men, his snarl nearly deafening even as Ashi raced away.

Vague details of the room were visible to her, illuminated by the flow of the Force around them, and she recognized stairs down from their stage towards the audience. Slowing fractionally, she stumbled down them, and…

She sensed it as if in slow motion: the single unimpaired figure leaping from the stage, flying towards her. Then they hit her like a sack of bricks, sending her skidding to the ground. Ashi spat out blood as her jaw cracked the ground, struggling up, but a knee dug into her back. As she yelped, her hands were jerked behind her roughly, the cold nip of cuffs at her wrists and telltale _shick_ of metal telling her exactly what was happening before her captor even spoke.

"Revan," crowed the soldier, jerking her to her feet by her handcuffed wrists despite her struggle and string of curses, "in the name of the Galactic Republic, I hereby arrest you for crimes against the galaxy—"

A gasp rang up from everyone in hearing distance, and for those not so lucky, the word was passed on instantly, a murmur growing like a storm gathering force. On the stage, nearly all motion had ceased, Dodonna's jaw hanging slack as she took in the chaos her ceremony had become. All eyes had been on Ashi, in the iron grip of the Republic officer, but she had never heard the nuances of her charges. At that moment, as she twisted away from the soldier's grip, a second captor—the one, Ashi suspected, that she'd kicked previously—pressed a stun baton against her neck. Her eyes had rolled back into her head, a final slurred protest dying on her lips as she collapsed.

By now, Ashi had learned it hadn't been Dodonna's fault. Apparently, even parts of the Republic kept secrets from each other, and capturing Revan unawares and in public had been planned by a loop the admiral wasn't part of. However, that couldn't lessen Ashi's fury, and left to her own devices, she might have spent the next few minutes indulging the feeling.

But, caught up in remembering, it was as if she'd pulled a tripwire before recalling it was there. Ashi found the newest image rising up to take the place of the ceremony's disaster.

How inescapable the flashback was was worrying, she knew, fringing on dangerous. The memories still refused to fade, and it was beginning to frighten her. Every night, when she slept, it was the same thing: a rapid-fire collage of her life, like watching a train wreck in slow motion. She knew the ending, could see every second bringing them closer to falling, but couldn't do anything but watch it fall apart.

Even during the day, though, they lingered insistently, like ghosts with business still unfinished. Each time she delved into them, though, she came up with shadows and holes in the images. She was sure, a nagging suspicion, that there was something she had to remember, but didn't know what.

And it was all made worse by the newest fragment, something she'd recalled just before she woke up from the ruined ceremony. It swelled, overwhelming her attention, and suddenly Ashi felt herself sinking into remembering…

…"_What do you mean, _what's the point_?"_

"_I'm just asking what they did. Rev… they've got a point," Malak said, wrapping his arms around her from behind. She stared out from the ship's window at the pinpoints of starlight in front of her, juggling conversation, incredulity, his sudden proximity—even she couldn't concentrate all the time, especially when muscles like _that_ were pressed against her—and the nagging thought for her to keep up her guard. At this range, despite her armor, he could gut her before she even had the chance to call him 'apprentice'._

"_I'm sure," he continued dryly, "that you've got something figured out, Rev, but what is it? There's got to be something else, right? Something more than just… ruling the galaxy." He leaned his head on her shoulder, and she heard him smiling. "What's the plan, mastermind?"_

_Mastermind. Soon, he'd just say master, and this was precisely why. Listening warily, she frowned: he hadn't sensed it, too? Didn't he notice the way the Mandalorians had prepared for battle, with stealth they'd pulled seemingly from thin air? Or the tickling in the back of her mind, a touch she'd first felt at Malachor and since had been unable quite to forget?_

_And what it told her, precisely, was—was—was _so important_— _

A flicker through the memory like static, a video jumping, and then _the faintest sense of secrecy as she shoved _something_ to the back of her mind and pressed her lips against Malak's cheek. "Because we can do it better, remember?" she whispered, and knew she was lying, though, to Ashi's near-pain, didn't remember _why_. "We deserve it, Malak."_

"_Good enough for me," he replied, twisting to kiss her directly, his lips familiar and eager against hers as she ran her hands along his shoulders…_

Ashi blinked, and then she was lying in the armchair in the empty apartment again. Malak's face was gone, though her lips still felt the memory of pressure, and her eyes ached for the vision they had lost. Neither upset her significantly—lingering senses were growing to be a typical side effect of the blackouts.

What did upset her was the gap in the memory: the hole where it stuttered for just a moment. She'd had a_ reason_, a legitimate cause for everything she'd done, and she needed to know what it was. In two days, she was going to be on trial—yet further proof of how time flew now—and the defense's current plan was to put her on the stand and have her apologize profusely. What else would she do, plead innocent?

It wasn't convincing. As a matter of fact, it was so _un_convincing that it'd probably land her—if she was _lucky_—a life sentence.

But if she could remember a _reason_ for everything…

The apartment cell in the Coruscanti Republic Headquarters was silent save the soft breath of a single person. Ashi shifted in the chair, feet hanging over one arm and head resting on the other, and closed her eyes, letting the memory swallow her again.

* * *

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we return to the case of Revan vs. the Galactic Republic. Prosecution, rise…"

The voice of the Supreme Chancellor rang through the enormous Senate Hall, magnified until it was a roar to fill the spiraling, boundless chamber. Ashi, at her table near the foot of his stand, took a deep breath; under the table, her fingernails dug into her palms. It was the third day of her trial, an event which, despite all news networks having been banned from recording, was being followed by almost everyone in the galaxy. It was so massive the trial had become the responsibility of the Senate rather than the judicial branch, an occurrence Ashi had been aware was possible but had never seen before in her lifetime. Only the worst cases—the largest, the most controversial—were actually deemed outside the court's jurisdiction.

Then again, there were a lot of people who weren't happy at all to see Revan back. Murderous, perhaps, was an accurate description of what she'd seen so far. Ashi wasn't too pleased with them, either.

She was equally opposed to the prosecutor. The senator of Corellia had taken the job, a woman with an oily lilac aura who used vivid descriptions—_monstrous_, _inhumane_, and _singlehanded catalyst of the Sith War _so far among them, in the opening statement alone. Already she had called Vandar and Dorak to speak, both of whom had been completely useless in Ashi's defense. "The mind wipe was meant to erase her other self completely, but we can't really know how much difference it has made," said Dorak, and even Vandar admitted doubts that their little scout-out of Ashi's mind had had a lasting effect.

Bastila, too, had been called as a witness, and it had torn at Ashi to watch her struggle to fight the crush of the Senate's questioning. The girl had insisted furiously that Ashi was a better person now, calling her own brief fall-but-return-to-the-Jedi-thanks-to-Ashi into play, but couldn't deny the memories she'd sensed through the bond. This meant that so far, it had been proven that, (a), Ashi Lucas was Revan, (b), that, this said, she was guilty of too many crimes to list, and (c), that there was no proof 'Ashi' wasn't Revan inwardly, waiting for a new opportunity to strike.

So the Corellian—and really, everyone who stood behind her—were all too ready to strike _first_.

"Your honor," said the prosecutor loudly, "the prosecution calls the Revan, the defendant, alias 'Ashi Lucas', to the stand."

A murmur like the echo of running water passed through the hall as Ashi stood, lifting her chin. They hadn't let her wear a hood, but the bandages wove in front of her eyes and over the worst of the scar, soft against her eyelids. Belatedly, she considered that looking half-mummified didn't help her seem trustworthy.

Refusing to show a hint of concern, however, she tilted her head up reflexively, focusing on the Senate's Supreme Chancellor. The man who currently came closest to running the galaxy branch was watching her closely, his aura—a rich green-blue—flickering between jabs of angry red and smooth, determined green. "Witness," he said, "take your place."

As she nodded, her seat rose, gliding smoothly through the air until it drew even with the Chancellor's stand. She was directly in the center of the room, the focus of every gaze as she took a deep breath. In front of her, floated the Corellian senator: in her own seat, now detached from its position on the wall. Ashi waited.

"Do you swear," droned the Chancellor, "to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, in the name of the Galactic Republic?"

A nod accompanied Ashi's reply. "I do," she answered, though inwardly wondering why, if the Galactic Republic was her opponent in the case, why its name should possibly mean anything to her.

"Proceed, senator."

"Ashi Lucas," drawled the Corellian woman, drifting imperceptibly closer. "We'll start with the basics, I think. You are Revan, correct?"

"Not at the moment."

The crowds shifted, and a prickle of crimson coursed through the senator's aura. "_Were _you or were you not," she clarified, "the same Revan who led the Sith Armada against the Republic two years ago?"

Ashi grimaced inwardly, hating the answer. "Yes."

"Yes?"

Oh, she _hated_ lawyers.

"Yes," she repeated grudgingly. "I was."

"And you were attacked by Darth Malak, only to be saved and spared by the Jedi?"

"I was."

"They mindwiped you?"

"Yes."

"But it hasn't lasted?"

"It has," she corrected. "I don't remember everything. The memories aren't consciously mine—Revan, to me, is a separate person, and I'm separate from her."

A new pulse of red filled the senator's aura, determination not to be outdone. "But you remember some things."

"Yes."

"These memories have been slowly returning since your encounter with Malak on the Leviathan?"

A sinking feeling, dread settling heavily in her stomach, told Ashi where the woman was leading the line of questions, but she couldn't respond. "They don't come back fluidly," she disagreed. "Most of the memories are too damaged to come back."

Abruptly, the woman's voice was icy. "Answer the question, Revan," she hissed. "Have some of your memories continued to return since your capture by the Leviathan?"

Ashi took a deep breath. "Yes," she replied. "_Some_ of them."

"And do you have any _proof_ that they will not continue to do so?"

It took all her effort to speak without gritting her teeth. She could feel the stare of every senator in the room trained on her face, searching for even a hint of hostility. "No, I don't."

"There you have it, ladies and gentlemen." The Corellian woman straightened, turning to speak to the wall of senators directly behind her. "Before us, we have the Dark Lord Revan, who has admitted both to remembering her past and previous crimes and the likelihood that she will continue to recall these events. This woman led an armada against the Republic, crippling worlds and irrevocably destroying lives. Among the crimes she stands responsible for are the bombing of Telos and similar destruction of innumerable other planets, the assassinations of numerous political figures within the Republic, the brainwashing or even murders of Jedi who refused to join her cause…"

_But I had a reason…!_ There was something lurking in the back of Ashi's mind, a fragment of memory expanding like a balloon inside her skull until the pressure felt almost painful. Frack, she needed to remember…

"And all this," continued the senator, voice rising, "for herself, through her vain desire to _master the galaxy_—"

"That's not why I did it."

A shudder ran through the Senate Hall, a collective intake of breath. Ashi barely registered she'd spoken until the words were already out. Scarlet swam in the Corellian woman's aura, dying the lavender a sick, swirling red. "Oh?" she demanded softly. "And perhaps you'd care to explain why, Revan? Enlighten us," she drawled, giving the wall of senators an indulgent glance as she spoke. "What is it you believe excuses your actions—what cause could justify… no, not _justify_: what cause could _merit_ your tyranny over the galaxy? What plan did you have that made it all _worth it _in the en—"

Ashi remembered.

_Something she'd seen, outside the Rim, something cold and dark and stronger than any they'd ever known…_

_Something that would come, she knew; something she had to fight at all costs. The Star Forge was a means, but far from an end—frack, the _Republic _had been a means for her. She'd eliminated those she had to so it would fall as she intended, but she intended to keep the framework of it, rebuild a stronger galaxy in its place…_

…_Because if she didn't, there wouldn't be a galaxy to rebuild after the True Sith came._

_And… and maybe _her_ plans had been ruined by Malak, who didn't understand, by the Jedi, who lacked the foresight to recognize the threat, and now by the Republic, who didn't trust her any more, _their_ plan was very much intact._

_They were coming_.

Captured by every camera trained to her face, seen by every senator in the room, Ashi's face drained of color, her hands tightening against the edge of the seat. She stumbled against the side of the chair unexpectedly, sending a gasp ricocheting through the hall. The new flood of images, of _panic_, was rising in her, and she couldn't hold out against it, but she had to explain—she would never have this chance again.

"Because there's… _something_ coming," they heard her gasp, her voice constricted as she clung to the rail. "Something out there… past the Rim… they're coming… we have to stop it…!"

The bailiff edged closer, ready to grab Ashi as she lurched sideways, scrabbling to grab onto something with her hands still cuffed. He grabbed her shoulder, free hand reaching to grab his blaster; before he could move, however, Ashi staggered into him—the fight to hold out against the memory proving too much—collapsing, as he abruptly let her go, to the ground.

The Senate, one collective organism, stared.

The Corellian senator, recovering within moments, turned to give the entire room a look of '_I told you so_'.

In their seats below, Vandar and Dorak understood suddenly for the first time what the full cost of the mindwipe might be.

* * *

Ashi woke up in the hospital in time to figure out something very important was going on.

Her first thought was how badly she hated waking and not seeing, but the second was to register familiar voices nearby. She could make out soft murmurs, snippets of words unable to be heard, but two things stopped her from ignoring it: first, if it was the same hospital, these people were both doctors and Jedi, neither of which she trusted, and second, she'd recognized the people as their auras, through the wall of her room, came into focus. Carth's aura, and Bastila's, and even Vandar's to a smaller—no pun intended—extent, had exploded with color. Something significant was being said.

She reached out through the Force, extending her awareness until the words amplified with range. "Testimony... clear proof... is no longer in her right mind," she heard in an unfamiliar voice, and then, "Mental cleansing… may be best option."

"Mind wipe?" Carth demanded. "…want to _mind wipe _her? You're not serious… what screwed up her head in the first place!"

"Please, Commander—"

"Don't _please, Commander_ me!" he growled. "…No way in hell I'm going to let you…!"

"Perhaps what Com… Onasi means to say," interrupted Vandar, "is that… not successful before… no way to know it would help her now."

"On the contrary," disagreed the Jedi—it could have been Ashi, but he sounded horrifically calm. "Mind damaged… since Malak's attack on her ship… possible that… cleansing wipe could remove issues entirely."

"And what would she remember?" Carth this time, warily.

"Little," the doctor admitted. "But all relationships could be rebuilt… give her a background including… friends and family. She would… free to live a healthy life… after the procedure." His way of speaking was just like his appearance: clean-cut and clinical, frosted with the faintest hint of apathy. "Please consider… may be only option… almost certain… drive her to insanity otherwise."

There was a very long silence. At last, Vandar spoke, sounding… thoughtful? _Oh, frack… oh, space, no, he wouldn't, not really—_

"Conceivably… could cure her," he murmured. "Perhaps… correct. It may be the best option."

"She'd be the same person you know," the Jedi replied confidently. "Just no longer troubled by these memories."

_But then I'm _not_ the same fracking _person_!_ Ashi wanted to scream, but she needed too badly to hear whatever Bastila or Carth said next. There was quiet for a long time, but then the girl sighed deeply. Ashi pictured her closing her eyes in thought, forehead creasing in thought.

"If… if it's the only option," she murmured at last, "then I think… we have to try it."

"Bastila!"

A surge of gratitude burst through Ashi as Carth spoke. The shock in his voice, and even more audibly, the disgust, was the best thing she'd heard so far. A chorus of shushes erupted around him, but he forged on, albeit more softly. "How could you say that?" he hissed. "She's your friend! She saved your life!"

"And we owe… to her to do the same!" snapped Bastila. "Carth… going to destroy her! …Can't even have a conversation without passing out; sooner or later she... start merging lines between Revan and Ashi, _forgetting _who we even _are—_"

The Jedi leapt in, cutting her off as her voice rose. "Commander, please understand that these memories, for Revan… uh," he corrected, clearly the recipient of at least two glares, "for Ashi, are a cancer to her… Will destroy her… nothing we can do to stop them. Consider this… not an erasing," he said calmly, spreading his hands, "but a cleansing."

Carth crossed his arms. "Her choice," he growled. "We ask _her_."

"She isn't in her right mind," the man objected. "Do… any idea what kind of stress introducing this… could bring? What that could do to her… already fragile state?"

Carth's aura, previously blazing with color, settled suddenly. a "Well," he declared, "then _I_ refuse to give consent."

_Thank space…! _

"…All due respect, Commander… isn't your decision to make."

"The _hell _it's not my decision! I'm the only fracking one with her in mind here!"

"Actually, Commander, it might be best if you don't… seem to be clouding your judgment."

"_Emotional attachments? And what the frack is that supposed to mean?_"

"…Most appropriate person to give consent would be Padawan Shan. Her bond means… very close to Re—to Ashi… more capable to make the decision."

"Bastila." Instantly, all the anger dropped from Carth's voice, and Ashi saw a new orange shimmering in his aura, a renewed fear. Her own horror sharpening her senses and lending a terrible clarity to the scene, Ashi could suddenly hear every word he said. "Bastila, please," he whispered, shifting slightly—probably to look the girl in the eyes. "It's Ashi. You can't seriously agree to let them just… just_ destroy_ her!"

"Haven't you been listening?" Bastila protested weakly. "It's too late for that, Carth; she's destroying herself!"

Ashi couldn't take it any longer.

"Carth!" she exploded, jumping out of bed and catching herself unsteadily on the wall. "Carth, please!" She staggered to the door, coming face-to-face with him as, legs weak from lack of use, she stumbled into the frame. His aura was glowing a frenzied orange, tossing and turning in panic. "You know I'm not crazy!" she insisted, grabbing his arm. "Carth, don't let them do this! _Bastila!_"

She spun towards the Jedi, shaking her head frantically. "What's _wrong_ with you? You're just going to let them kill me?"

"Ashi—"

"You think that's not what it is? They're getting rid of me for good; what else can you call it?"

A cold hand closed on her shoulder, and she heard the Jedi speaking next to her. His aura, she realized at this closer distance, was a placid, almost still blue-gray: he really, honestly didn't give a frack. "She's in no state to give an informed consent," he said calmly. "Clearly, Padawan Shan, she isn't in her right mind."

"Let me go!" she snarled, swiping at the doctor's hand. "Carth, Bastila, I saw something!" She'd stopped worrying about keeping any cool: she was aware that a combination of fear and fury was making her sound less and less credible by the second, but how else could she respond? There _wasn't _a reasonable way to take this. "I'm not crazy," she repeated. "I saw it; I told everyone at the hearing. There's something out there: I knew there was, and it's coming, and if you take away my memories there's going to be no way to stop it—please, and I want to be me, I _like_ being me."

"Ashi…" Her voice was thick as she placed a hand on her friend's arm, but the gesture had unmistakable finality. "Please," she whispered. "This is going to destroy you otherwise—none of us can watch that, Ashi."

"I _know _who I _am_!" she spat, voice rising. "Look in the bond—I'm not confused; it's you guys who don't get it…"

"Excuse me!" called the Jedi. "Kolto sedative, please."

"Hey!" she snapped, jerking back from Bastila's touch. "Hey, no, you can't—"

Ignoring her entirely, the Jedi grabbed for her arm; she swiped at him, but his cold fingers snapped shut around her wrist like a manacle. A moment later, she felt the sting of a needle in her arm. "No," she protested, but the word slurred in her mouth, and then her legs turned liquid and she pitched forward.

Incredulity freezing him in place, Carth watched for not the first time—but, though he didn't know it, what was to be his last time for a while—as she crumpled in front of him, whatever she'd been about to say lost as she blacked out. The Jedi caught hold of her, an orderly rushing to help him cart Ashi back into her room. The door slammed in front of them, and as the noise hit him like a slap across the face, the enormity of what had just happened sunk in at last.

"I can't believe you," he spat, whirling on Bastila, and the girl flinched away from him, terror in her eyes. The hypocrite—he wondered if she'd seen the same emotion in Ashi's face, seconds ago.

"I'm sorry," she blurted, "but it's for the best. You don't understand, Carth: I've seen her mind; it's falling apart. When they say she's going insane, they mean it. She's unraveling."

"And so you think you should finish the job!" he accused, voice climbing. Down the hall, a couple nurses spared concerned glances for him, eyes widening in interest as they recognized Commander Onasi himself—and roaring at Bastila Shan, no less.

"Calm yourself, Commander Onasi!" chastised Vandar, raising a gnarled finger. "Bastila has a much deeper understanding of Ashi's condition than you. You would be wise to trust her judgment in his matter."

He took a moment to stare both of them in the eyes. Bastila seemed to choke as she met his glare, but there was a shadow of pity in Vandar's face as he stared back. Somehow, it only made Carth angrier. "Actually," he replied, his voice low and biting, "I'm not sure I can trust either of you any more."

He spun on his heel, turning away before either of them could say a word, and made it all the way to the garden in front of the hospital before he broke down.

He nearly fell onto a bench, eyes sliding closed. He'd lost her—frack, she might as well have been killed by Malak as to have this done to her. Where was all the fracking protection he'd promised now? No, he couldn't even keep that promise. And because of that, she was going to...

_No._

She'd been right: they were going to kill her. So he had to stop it.

But she officially wasn't safe here—or anywhere, really, where the Republic had jurisdiction.

So… she had to get out of here.

They'd run away.

He dismissed the idea—with some effort—as stupid before it had even fully formed. The Republic was going to be watching him closely enough now, let alone if he tried to run away with a Sith Lord. And… and he had other responsibilities: Dustil, and probably Mission. He wasn't going to leave his son behind for any reason. Besides, even if he didn't owe the Republic anything any more, he did owe Dodonna a hell of a lot. She had a war to finish fighting, and he wanted it seen through.

He was too… too _responsible_, Carth realized sadly, to do that.

But Ashi had to get away, and she had to be with someone who could protect her. Someone who'd betray the Republic in a heartbeat for her if that was what she needed, and someone who'd make sure nothing happened to her if it killed them.

There was exactly one person he could think of.

The very idea disgusted him, but it wasn't about him. It was about Ashi, and who could keep her safe. And the truth was, no one was better equipped for it than the person he had in mind. They could take the Ebon Hawk, sneak away at night, and… and Ashi could go look for whatever was coming from past the Rim. Maybe it did all sound insane, but if he was giving her the benefit of the doubt on that front, he might as well go all the way.

And then if worst came to worst, at least she'd be with someone as crazy as she might well be.

With a grim smile, Carth stood and turned onto the street. First things first: he had to make sure that the man would agree to help in the first place.

But somehow, he didn't think this would take much convincing.

* * *

The next day, Carth arrived at the hospital and apologized reluctantly to Ashi's doctor for his conduct if not his reasons, asking to speak to Ashi. Not to his surprise, the Jedi was skeptical at first, but Carth drew himself up to his full height and explained that he understood it was necessary, and he would stand behind it—and the support of a new war hero was nothing to scoff at—but he wanted to say goodbye to her. _Alone_, he added pointedly, walking into Ashi's room as he spoke and letting the door click shut behind him.

Within five minutes he'd explained the plan to her, speaking quietly but urgently. As he did, he slipped the security clearance card out of his pocket—_it'll get you out of the hospital, just be quiet_—and into her hand, pressing it against her palm—_and you'll be able to get the ship. I'll make sure you can get out without them getting caught. _

She was quiet for a moment, and then suddenly reached to hug him, burying her face in his shoulder. "Frack," she muttered. "I owe you so much, don't I?"

"You can make it up by taking care of yourself."

"Thanks, flyboy," she whispered.

"It's what all of us should be doing for you," he opined.

"Yeah, but you're the one who _is_ doing it, Carth."

He pulled back, stroking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "I love you," he said quietly. "You know that, right?"

She pressed her lips together. "I love you, too," she echoed, "but not…"

_Not enough_, he understood, and couldn't keep from adding, "Not yet."

"Yet," she agreed, kissing him softly on the cheek before he could pull away. Without warning, he pulled her tightly against his chest again. For the first time, it seemed to sink in that he might never see her again.

"You have to come back."

"I don't know how soon I can promise," she whispered. "I'm going all the way to—"

"Don't!" he hissed, pulling back to cut her off. Ashi flinched at the burst of panic in his aura, startled. "I can't know," he continued, more calmly. "Ashi, they're going to know I had something to do with this, even if they can't prove anything. You can't tell anyone. They can't find you."

She bit her lip. _I won't let them find you_, said his aura, _if it kills me._ The honesty of it was bittersweet, tearing at her. She wanted to stay here with him, and he could keep her safe; there'd be no obligations, and maybe she really could get over Alek soon if she did…

But she had a job to do.

"I should go," he said, standing up and starting across the room, only to hesitate again. "Your operation's in eight days, so—"

"A week," she finished. "I got it."

"Right." He nodded, hand tightening on the bedframe. "So… good luck."

"Thanks," she murmured, half-smiling. "See you, Carth."

"You'd better," he muttered, suddenly fierce as he looked back at her. "Ashi, you have to come back."

She watched his aura glow a darker blue, sadness and maybe even loneliness. Frack, he was so _good_, she thought miserably, wishing she could say anything to make him feel better. _I'm sorry I'm crazy and that's pulling us apart… I'm sorry I'm screwed up over my first love, who I just killed…_ "I promise," she said softly, at last.

She meant it.

He nodded once, turned, and walked out the door.

* * *

Ashi let herself into the apartment, but stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame with crossed arms. "Ready?" she called. Her voice was quiet, but didn't need to be loud. He'd known she was coming. Onasi's instructions had been extremely clear.

"If you are," he replied gruffly, standing and stowing the blaster he'd been idly tinkering with. "Said goodbye to everyone yet?"

"None of them I want to say goodbye to."

He raised an eyebrow. "Can't lie to a Mandalorian, sweetheart."

"I'm not lying," she replied calmly. "I'm already taking HK with me."

Fleetingly, the corners of his mouth twitched upwards, but he wasn't convinced. "The Twi'lek?" he prompted. "Onasi's kid? Said anything to them?"

She shifted uncomfortably. "Sort of."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I left them a letter. Well, one for each of them, and one for Jolee. And I talked to Carth. But just them."

He laughed, not entertained so much by the action as by how he knew everyone would react to it. "And you expect the Jedi to take this lying down?"

She took a deep breath, and for a moment he wondered why he'd asked. It wasn't a question to poke fun or to irritate—bringing up what that schutta had done might be crossing a line. "Actually," she replied finally, "since you asked, I hope Bastila takes all the heat for it. She fracking deserves it."

Canderous smirked crookedly. That was better—he could hear from her voice how she'd enjoyed saying that. "But I also expect," Ashi added, quirking an eyebrow, "that she won't be able to do anything about it, because we'll be off-world, cloaked, and in hyperspace before they even find out. If you're _ever_ ready. Or, you know, we can just wait until tomorrow. Just so long as Mandalore doesn't feel rushed."

"_Udesii._" _Calm down_. "You've made your point," Canderous muttered, slipping a bag across his shoulder. She didn't miss the little river of gold that ran through his aura at the name, though—he couldn't have been prouder of the title, even if he regarded it as his right. "But we can wait until tomorrow if you want," he threw in, unable to help it. "Anything so the Dark Lord won't miss her operation."

It came out softly, but by far loud enough for her to hear. Ashi's jaw tightened, enough of a warning for him to continue quickly, "Do you have the droids?"

"Picking them up before the ship," she replied. "HK's thrilled, as you can imagine. He doesn't like not being able to shoot things here."

"Can't believe I'm doing this," he muttered. "Going headlong off the Rim with you, your would-be Basilisk, and the scrap heap?"

"It's an adventure," she grinned. "You used to love those. Besides"—and here, just the slightest hint of bitterness, if nothing she wasn't justified to have—"I can't exactly captain a ship on my own," she reminded him, waving a spread-fingered hand in front of her eyes.

He snorted, giving the room a once-over to make sure nothing important would be left. They wouldn't going back for anything. "Droids could do it," he pointed out.

"And when it breaks? You're going to let me fly a ship while trying to fix HK, blind." She shook her head in reproach. "Did I mention there's fighting?"

"I'm in, I'm in." He glanced back from the room, satisfied, and grinned. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," she replied. "The droids are waiting at the ship." She paused, frowning, before wondering anxiously, "It's not light yet, is it?"

There were subtle differences in the Force depending on the time of day—the general aura fluctuated depending on the amount of life in the air around her, or the position of the sun and resultant echo of heat and warmth—but she hadn't learnt it well enough to judge time. Of all the trials blindness brought, she'd never have thought she'd miss _light_ so much—or, more specifically, the orientation it gave. There was nothing more frightening than bring lost for reference not only to where she was but for _when _it was.

But it didn't matter. Not like you needed to know what time of day it was in hyperspace, anyway.

"It's nearly dawn," he replied. "Are you ready to go?'

"The hell I am," she replied, grinning. He watched her face intently, characteristically indifferent as to whether he was obviously staring. Though he would have shot anyone on the spot who dared say he waxed poetic, she looked beautiful right now, her face glowing with the prospect of their journey. She'd missed this, whether or not she'd admit it, and the thought made him smile as he followed her out of the apartment, kicking the door shut behind him.

At 5:08 Standard Galactic Time, the Ebon Hawk exited its hangar with full security clearance. There were four passengers on board, two mechanical and two human. One was clutching a blaster rifle in one hand and modifier flamethrower in the other; one was running system checks; one sat in the pilot seat, jaw set in a grin as he navigated the liftoff; and one lounged in the copilot seat, watching through her companion's eyes. She knew he hated her going in his head, but he'd grudgingly accepted that there were some things she deserved to see. Her arms were crossed as she stared—in a roundabout way—at the stars in front of them, but her face, though previously masklike, was now split by an unwilling smile.

At precisely 5:16:27 G.S.T., the Ebon Hawk entered hyperspace, and the Republic lost any chance in hell they might have had at catching its passengers.

In other words: by 5:16 that morning, the ex-Dark Lord Revan had disappeared completely.

* * *

_Sightings of Revan Confirmed To Be False…_

_The supposed sightings of the ex-Sith Lord which have occupied the Republic for the last couple days have been proven to be false. The previous Sith Lord Revan, now traveling under the alias 'Ashi Lucas', was supposedly sighted in a cantina brawl on Nar Shaddaa, but the source, proven inebriated at the time the fight took place, has been shown to have been mistaken in his allegations—_

He stopped reading right there, shoving the holo-net screen away. Of course he'd let himself hope too much, but he hadn't been able to help it. Nar Shaddaa was just the kind of place she'd like, and a cantina brawl… well, with Canderous and HK-47 with her, it'd be little wonder.

He cut off the train of thought—which unfailingly led to a stabbing, futile regret—in its track, heaving a sigh that bit through the office air like gunfire. Of course it had been a stupid hope to think she was back, but it had been a hope nonetheless, and he didn't have a lot of those lately. The public had, after all, proven itself time and time again to have the attention span of a brain-dead tach—he'd had no good reason but optimism to assume they'd care about any single person, even the ex-lord Revan, for more than five weeks…

Let alone five months…

Let _alone_ five years.

There was a separate branch of the Republic entirely to concern itself with missing people, the nearest category they could fit her into. Possibly Ashi _should_ have been on the wanted list instead—something about disappearing while presumed insane, right before a Force-induced lobotomy—but the Jedi had stepped in, tactfully drawing one of their inarguable veils over the whole mess, and he'd got a little weight to throw around himself… and, moreover, no bounty hunter wanted to go after her.

So Missing Persons was where, unglamorously enough, the file titled "Revan, a.k.a. Ashi Lucas" had wound up. Oh, the department had certainly been interested in her at first, but first cross-species girls had started going missing in Motta the Hutt's cantinas, and then a senator's kid had run away in a fit of independence assertion. Shit happened, just like usual, and her file had just been shoved away. The Republic had a war to end, and better things to do than chase a crazy Grey Jedi who posed a likely minimal threat and didn't want to be found.

Which was why he kept a holo-screen by his desk, streaming a constant news-search of anything containing "Ashi Lucas" or "Revan". Most of his friends, he knew, thought it was verging on sad, and Jordo had tried to set him up with plenty of Telosian widows, but to no avail. Carth kept the holo-screen on his desk, re-running searches across the galaxy 24/7.

It was mostly bantha fodder, which was why he'd been so excited when this whole Nar Shaddaa mess had erupted. But naturally he hadn't had any luck—_naturally_ the whole damn story would prove to be a dead end, just like the last one, and the one before it. Space, there were days when he wondered if she'd just disappeared from the face of the fracking _galaxy_—

"Carth?" came a voice from the doorway.

He glanced up in surprise. A tall, leggy Twi'lek stood there, leaning on the doorframe with an ease that proved she was a common visitor to the office. "Ca-arth," she sang again, clearly liking the sound of it. "You're ignoring me."

"Impossible," he replied calmly, attempting a smile that had no effort behind it. The Twi'lek shook her head.

"Workaholic," she lamented, rolling her eyes. Carth raised an eyebrow, unable to help thinking that she was one to talk. Though naturally blue, her cheeks were flushed lavender from the summer heat and a little sunburn she'd insisted she was immune to. Her hat, backwards and slung loosely over her lekku, read 'Telos Project—It's Up To Us' in block print. She'd been outside all day, clearly, and the wiry muscle that wound up and down her limbs was a hard-won testament to the work she'd done over the past year-and-then-some.

He didn't respond, and she frowned after a moment. "Hey, you okay, geezer?" she wondered, folding her arms over her chest.

Carth shoved the holoscreen away quickly. "Mission," he muttered, by way of greeting. "Your shift can't be over yet, can it?"

The girls raised an eyebrow, shooting him a look of vague, sideways concern. "Lovely to see you too. And it kind of _is_ over—it's, uh, _night_," she pointed out, nodding towards the window.

"I… what?" he murmured, but a glance to the outside told him she wasn't joking. Dusk was beginning to blanket the surface of the planet, replacing the splattered sunlight that usually slanted across his floor. "Didn't realize," he admitted lamely, looking down at the paperwork on his desk.

Mission bit her lip. There were dark circles looping under her eyes, and she was covered head to foot in a thin film of reddish construction dust, but neither was the reason she suddenly looked achingly tired. "The Nar Shaddaa thing?" she guessed quietly.

"Dead end," he answered gruffly. "Just some spicehead getting excited over nothing."

"I'm sorry," she offered sincerely, reaching up awkwardly to tug at her hat. Twi'leks, frankly, weren't meant to wear baseball caps, but damned if she didn't jam it on somehow every morning. Carth never would have expected her to be the outdoorsy, construction-work type, but she'd taken to the Telos restoration project like a fish to water. He suspected much of it, though she'd never admit, had to do with Taris, and how she would have liked to do the same there.

"Stupid to have expected anything anyway," he declared, with a halfhearted attempt to shuffle the paperwork into a neater pile. "Like she'd even come back by now, let alone to Nar Shaddaa."

"Hey," Mission interrupted fiercely, raising a hand to cut him off as she started into the room. "_No. _Stop. She's coming back, okay? Why wouldn't she, Carth?"

"Oh, let's think. _Arrest, _maybe? That _mindwipe_ waiting for her if she does?"

"She's Ash," Mission snapped. "She's not going to leave us." Carth didn't contradict her; he'd learned it was best not to argue with Mission logic. _She's Ashi, therefore…_ was the girl's justification for just about everything. "You think she was scared of a stinking mindwipe?" Mission demanded. "Of _all _the things she's got to worry about, you really think she'd stay gone because she's scared of what the Jedi want?"

"Fine," he replied. "She's gone now for the same higher purpose she eloped for to begin with. Happy, kid?"

"She didn't _elope_ at all," Mission corrected. "Really? Ashi _eloping_ with Canderous? That's just gross, Carth."

He sighed, covering his face with a hand. It wasn't his faith in Ashi that faltered—and, frack, she could have been screwing _Malak_ and he'd still wait for her—but… ah, damn it. He'd just never trust Mandalorians, and the thought of one alone with Ashi, her _only companion_, sometimes kept him awake at night wanting to shoot something. "She's with him," he said flatly. "She's spent the last _five years _with him instead of me, Mission. Think about it."

"We are _so_ not having this conversation," Mission muttered to herself, slumping into one of the stiff-backed chairs by the door. "Look, I'm _thinking _that the grand almighty Admiral suffers from paranoia _and_ chronic O.C.D. Have a little faith, would ya? Jeez." She shook her head pityingly, lekku flopping across her shoulders.

"Fine. She didn't abandon us _solely _because of the operation, and Canderous clearly wouldn't jump her if he could. _Better_, Mission?"

"She didn't _abandon _us at all," Mission insisted, eyes narrowing. "She's doing something important, Carth, she told us. And she's coming back, okay? That's not abandoning—she'd only do that if she was scared, and Ashi ain't scared of anything here." She glanced towards the window, adding, "Ain't nothing _to_ be scared of on Telos, anyway."

He sighed, giving the paperwork one last, dubious glance. "I conceded you the point, Mission, not the battle."

"So it's Mission one, Carth zero?"

"Don't you have a date tonight?" he wondered, abandoning subtlety entirely to escape the argument. Despite being part of the Restoration Project—or maybe because of it—Mission had lost neither her idealism nor her confidence, and a large portion of each was reserved entirely for Ashi. It wasn't a fight Carth was ever likely to win, regardless of whether rationality and the last five years were on his side.

Mission raised an eyebrow. "Nice segue," she observed. "But yes, actually, I do. One of the locals, actually—I believe you've met him?"

"I was thinking more along the lines of, maybe you should leave to get ready?"

"He's meeting me here," she shrugged. "So I thought I'd grace you with my presence. You know, so you don't stay here all night pretending to read those forms." She waved offhandedly at the mountain of paper on Carth's desk, making a face. "Man, I _never_ want a desk job."

Carth gave a weary but genuine laugh, glancing up at her. "Do you think I did, ten years ago?"

"Yeah, but see, here's the thing," Mission explained, looking pleased to have coaxed a smile out of him. "You're all faithful to the Republic, so you'll totally do this if they ask you to. Me, I'm a free spirit. No obligations. Also, I can't pull off orange."

She was lying, and he knew it, despite the joke thrown in at the end. The truth was, she had all the obligations in the world, because she was _Mission_: she'd never give up on Telos if they needed her, and she'd always drop everything for any of her friends. But he didn't say that. "Well, if you ever changed your mind," he replied, "I know the Republic recruitment office would be happy to have you."

"Eew," she snorted—they'd had this conversation before. "Do I _look_ like I was made for a life of push-ups?"

"No," he muttered, "I'm sure a life of working in construction zones is much more suited to you. I understand completely."

Her hands flew protectively to her hat. "I like the Telos Project," she sulked, slouching sideways in the chair. "It's cool, okay? All this… fixing? It's like, I know I'm making a difference."

This time, the smile he shot her wasn't weary at all—a flash of sunlight breaking through the clouds for a split second as he looked up. "I understand," he assured her. "I'm happy for you, Mission."

She grinned back, before starting, a moment later, at the sound of footsteps padding down the hall. "Hello?"

The voice that came back was deep and happy, touched with traces of a hard-lost accent. "Hey, babe."

"You're here!" Mission chirped, leaping to her feet as a man turned into the doorway. Suddenly oblivious to Carth, she threw herself at him, and he caught hold of her, spinning her around in a circle before setting her down, laughing. Mission leant up for a kiss, and an instant later they were welded together, her lekku tangled around his neck. Carth, feeling strangely unwelcome in his own office, averted his eyes pointedly to the paperwork. _You'd think the two of them had been apart for months_, he speculated dryly, _not just a few hours._

Finally the two of them unlocked lips, Mission shooting a pointed look towards Carth at his desk. The boy straightened, a flush creeping over his cheeks. It was mostly hidden by dark stubble though, a five o'clock shadow that simply refused to be gotten rid of. He slipped an arm around his girlfriend, and Carth felt a flood of paternal protectiveness for her despite everything. Mission couldn't have grown up better, and he wondered if the boy knows how lucky he really was.

At the moment, her date just looked nervous, eyeing the admiral for signs of reproach. Seemed almost funny that he'd be cowed by a forty-something sitting behind a stack of paperwork—he stood about six feet and some inches now, topped with dark, shaggy hair that fell in his eyes. Jedi robes and lightsaber aside, he'd grown up to look a lot like his father.

"Good day?" Carth asked, tactfully not mentioning the kiss, and his son gave a worn grin.

"Exhausting. I worked with the Sith rehabs some more," he explained. "Space, these kids have been brainwashed. Was I really ever _that_ annoying?"

Carth and Mission exchanged a conspiratorial glance. "Yes," they both informed him, the latter with a smirk.

He rolled his eyes. "At least I've grown out of it," he replied. The jab, directly pointed at his girlfriend, made her shoot him a look from the corner of her eye.

"Did you want to go on a date tonight? Because we don't have to if you don't."

"Depends. You won't be up past your bedtime, will you?"

"You're _so_ annoying," she muttered, scowling. "I think it runs in the family."

"Ah, spending a little quality time with my dad?" he wondered, raising an eyebrow. Eyes darting towards the admiral, he wondered, "Which one am I supposed to feel sorry for?"

"Oh, _okay._ One more time," she warned, shooting him a sideways glance and holding up a finger for emphasis. "Go on, Dustil, just keep digging."

"All right, all right." He stopped, placing a hand under her chin to catch her gaze. "I'm sorry. Mission, you are an angel. I have never loved anyone more in my life—"

"_And_ never will."

"And never will," he agreed instantly. "And you are by far the single most mature person I know." He paused, allowing himself a smile he clearly considered well-earned. "Good?"

"You're improving," she conceded, but the wide grin on her face belied her nonchalance. "All right, but I've got to go swing by my apartment and shower, k? We laid foundations _all_ day today, and I am _gross_." She pulled a face on the last word, gesturing down at the reddish dust that coated her from mid-thigh to the soles of her thick construction boots.

Dustil let his mouth drop open in mock-disbelief. "Are you kidding? Red is your color."

Mission rolled her eyes. "You're obligated to tell me that," she replied. "Just meet me at my place in, like, ten minutes, okay?"

"Whatever you say," he nodded, giving her one final squeeze before letting her go. Mission paused, and then, to Carth's surprise, approached him instead of the door, wrapping her arms around him as he sat there, looking about as surprised as he was.

"I'm sorry about Nar Shaddaa," she murmured, and he understood, hugging her back with a grip made strong by gruff affection. She blinked hard as she pulled away, before turning from the door. Dustil, looking puzzled, murmured something too quiet for Carth to catch as she brushed past him. Momentarily, Mission's eyes darted to Carth, and then she gave a soft but rapid response where Carth caught only the words _Ash_ and _Nar Shaddaa_.

Dustil's mouth opened slightly, maybe in surprise and maybe sadness, and Mission eased past to the door. "Ten minutes," she said brightly. "Got it?"

"Got it," affirmed Dustil, who knew from experience that that meant at least twenty minutes until they even left the apartment, and she turned down the hall. They heard her padding away, and then the muted chime of an elevator. Dustil turned back to Carth, the smile melting off his face as he met his father's eyes.

"It dead-ended?" he asked, and Carth knew exactly what he meant.

"It's nothing," he replied tetchily, glancing sullenly away. "Stupid to hope."

"It's not!" Dustil protested, jaw dropping. "Dad, she's going to come back."

_Snowball's chance on Tatooine, she's still out there, Dustil_, he thought.

"I'm sure you're right," he replied.

Dustil gave him a short, skeptical look, and then shook his head. "Well, I _know_ I am."

"Good for you."

"Good."

A pause followed the statement, and Carth cleared his throat. "You should go," he pointed out. "Mission'll be waiting."

Dustil smiled slightly, despite himself. "You should head home too," he observed. "Don't think the junior officers like waking you up at your desk in the morning."

"I'll sleep wherever I want," he muttered, ignoring Dustil's snort. "I'm going," he assured his son. "Go on, go have fun."

"Night, Dad."

"Night, Dustil."

His son left the office.

Carth looked down at the screen again.

_Sightings of Revan Confirmed To Be False…_

And funnily enough, he smiled.

Of course she wouldn't be on Nar Shaddaa. She was somewhere out past even the Rim, doing whatever needed to be done. Even if she did have a snowball's chance, there was no way she wouldn't come back if she possibly could.

_Oh, that's right_, he remembered dazedly. _That's why I'm waiting. _Of course she'd come back—she was Ashi.

Or she could be crazy.

_No, _corrected his subconscious, which sat there eyeing Carth with a strange mixture of pity and amusement, you're_ the crazy one here_.

Probably true.

Carth shoved the paperwork aside, and closed the article, letting the monitor flicker and go black.

* * *

"'_Sightings of Revan Confirmed To Be False_'," he read aloud, and then snorted. "Nice cover-up."

Beside him, the woman scrutinized the headline, tilting her head to the side and then grinning. On the digital page, a blurred video-clip of the cantina fight played, followed by a shot of the unfortunate man who'd been stupid enough to recognize the ex-Dark Lord. He was staring at the camera with a bleary gaze, ever so slightly cock-eyed. His jaw hung open slightly as he mumbled an apology. Looking up from the headline page, the woman tilted her head to the side, smirking. "Just can't believe everything you read in the news, I guess."

Her companion smirked, but it vanished as his eyes flicked to his comm, narrowing as he took in the time. "Hey, remind me," he muttered, "why are we in this stinkhole when there's a lovely juma-filled cantina twenty meters away?"

"I agreed we'd meet here," shrugged the woman. "It's near the hangar. She told me they'd meet us in the corner alley opposite the Jekk'Jekk Tarr Cantina."

"Right. And did they specify if that would be this century?"

The woman shrugged calmly. "She's got to keep a low profile, flyboy."

"Yeah, because clearly"—he snatched the newsprint, flourishing it—"that's going just peachy already, right?"

"You know I try, Rand."

The voice came from behind the man and his friend, spoken by a cloaked figure at the mouth of the alley. Atton Rand jumped, shoulders jerking in surprise, and then rolled his eyes. "Jeez," he muttered, "you practice sneaking up on people, or is it just talent?"

She stepped calmly towards them, shadows cast by the filthy buildings on either side swallowing her instantly. A tall, weathered figure followed her: he was wearing the helm of Mandalore, a well-deserved present he'd recently been given, and a massive repeating blaster was slung over his back. Canderous Ordo surveyed the ex-Jedi and pilot in front of him with a warrior's gaze, a look that said _I could kill you, but I'm not interested enough yet._

Neither, to their credit, was intimidated. Both had fought in a war that had destroyed the Mandalorians—one more, even if it _was_ Mandalore himself, couldn't scare them.

"Nice to see you, too," replied the newcomer who'd spoken, eyeing the two people in front of her—eyeing, of course, being used in the loosest of terms. "And I think it's just one of those things it's nice to be good at." There was a pause, as her head shook slightly. "Frack, it's been a while since I saw either of you," she muttered. "You two ready?"

Her voice—and the hint of curves, under the dark cloak and even blacker armor—indicated her to be a woman, but there were no clues in her face, except perhaps the slight fullness of her lips. A hood was pulled up over her head, casting an even deeper shadow over her face. Her eyes reminded Atton and his companion of Visas Marr for a moment. Usually they were heavily bandaged, the bindings crossing the bridge of her vaguely crooked nose to mask both eyes, but she'd left them off today. Instead, a wide scar striped her face like a cruel victory banner, all but hidden by the different layers of shadow. Peering out from the darkness under her hood, any ordinary person would be unable to see at such a point.

Atton and his companion weren't looking at an ordinary person.

"We've been ready about an hour now, actually," he replied, unwilling to be outdone. "But, you know, it's fine, since we're in such a lovely place and all. Wonderful nightlife here," he added, waving a hand towards the dark, eerie alley around them.

"He's only being stupid because he's happy to see you," chimed in the blond beside Atton smoothly. "Hey, Rev—though I hear it's Ashi now?"

"I hear _you're_ going by Exile," countered the hooded figure, grinning. "How very not dramatic at all."

"Whereas subtlety's your real strong suit, isn't it?" The Exile tugged the newsprint from Atton's hand to a slight squawk of protest, holding it out to Ashi. Under the hood's shadow, the latter's forehead creased.

"You're going to have to be a little more helpful than _that_."

The Exile's lips fell open in realization, but she nodded, taking back the paper. For all Ashi could do with her new sight, reading had eluded her for five years now. "It's about the cantina fight," she explained, and Ashi's face lit up slightly.

"Oh, yeah," she muttered. "That was fun. Might've been nice if you'd managed to show for our meeting, though."

"You blew up the cantina before we could get there."

"Well, it was necessary."

She sounded furiously righteous, but behind her, Canderous snickered. Ashi dug an elbow into his side. "Come on," she persisted. "It's Nar Shaddaa. They'll have a new one by tomorrow."

The Exile shrugged, conceding that particular point, but held up a hand. "Well, your stunt also landed you on every newsfeed on the holonet."

"I took care of it," Ashi scoffed, waving a hand. "Guy who recognized me'd never even been near the Force before—didn't know what hit him. He's not going to be giving interviews any time soon."

"You did a good job," offered Atton, now eyeing the newsprint's video clip. The man under the headline was not only cock-eyed, he noticed, but possibly drooling slightly. "Looks like he's just crashed off a month-long spice high."

"So there's really not a problem at all, is there?"

The Exile pursed her lips. "Well, you probably don't want to stay on the planet much longer."

"I think that's why you're here," Ashi observed. "If memory serves, you've got my ship."

"Ah, that. Beauty of a thing."

"Shut up, Atton."

From the Exile's tone, it was clear she wasn't really angry, more speaking from reflex. Ashi raised an eyebrow—the gesture was half-lost in the shadow, but the same wry humor colored her tone as her face.

"So whenever you're ready, if you'd like to show me where my ship is…?"

"Our ship, actually," corrected Atton under his breath. The other three ignored him.

Ashi hesitated, using her Force vision to extend her sight. The immediate street by the alley's mouth was devoid of auras, but there wasn't an inch of Nar Shaddaa that had ever heard of peace and quiet. They'd want to keep moving before another complication arose—_two_ Revan sightings on the same planet, and within a week, would be a bad coincidence to maneuver around.

"We should get moving," she declared, suddenly startlingly serious. "Don't want another delay."

"We've got the ship in a hangar a few blocks away," the Exile declared. "We can start heading that way, if you want."

"Sounds good." Ashi paused, eyes narrowing instinctively as she gave the Exile and Atton a careful once-over. "You two think you can handle this?"

"Blasters, running, and drinking, Rev," replied Atton cheerfully. The Exile cocked an eyebrow.

"You even need to ask, Re—I mean, Ashi?"

"It's worse than you think out there," her friend said softly. For a moment, her face darkened, and the edge in her voice sent an unfamiliar chill running down the Exile's spine. "What's coming is going to be big. We_ are_ the backup forces, and this isn't like anything we've fought before."

"Worse than the Mandalorians?"

Ashi didn't smile, and the reply seemed even grimmer just from that. "Rand, compared to these ones, the Mandalorians are butterflies."

Canderous snorted. "I could resent that."

"Except it's true."

"They're good," he conceded to Ashi, before shooting the Exile and Atton a sharp look. "Damn good," he admitted grudgingly, the confession—from Mandalore, no less—enough to tell the pair exactly how frightening the True Sith were.

The Exile straightened proudly, tilting up her head. "We know what we're getting into," she replied. "I'm starting to like being good guys again."

"And I go where she goes," replied Atton firmly, earning a small grin from the Exile. Ashi rolled her eyes.

"If you two are done being fracking _adorable_…"

"Afraid I can't help that," broke in Atton, with a quirk of his lips.

Ashi shot the Exile a look, raising an eyebrow. _You know how to pick them, don't you?_ she wondered, speaking directly into her friend's mind.

_He makes me happy_, answered the blond, giving Atton a sideways glance. _That's more than I'd hoped for._ She scrutinuzed Ashi's face for a moment, eyes like those of an artist as they studied their subject, and then murmured, _I'm sorry, by the way._

Ashi stiffened faintly, fists tightening under the cloak. _About?_

_Alek. Well, and Onasi, I suppose._

_I'm fine_._ Five years is plenty of time to get over it._

_No,_ contradicted the Exile, _not really_. She hesitated, scrounging for clues in Ashi's expression, before adding, _He's waiting for you, you know. Onasi, I mean. Carth._

Ashi's lips tightened, pressing together. Her eyes in shadow, the Exile couldn't quite read if it was from frustration or something else. _I know,_ she admitted. _It's what I thought he would do._

Maybe it was the change in her otherwise-stony expression that put Atton on guard, but his eyes narrowed suddenly. "Are you two doing that Force-talking thing?" he demanded, suspicion filling his stare. A flood of color—bright, anxious orange—coursed through his aura, and Ashi smirked.

_What,_ she wondered,_ like this?_

…_+1/-1 card down; that's fifteen, so draw again…_

She laughed softly. _I forgot you did that._

"Keeps creepy people outta my head," he replied gruffly. "Hey, didn't you want to see the ship or something?"

"He's got a point," conceded Canderous, surprising all but Ashi as he spoke up. "Ready, Lucas?"

Without pause, as he watched, she broke abruptly into a smile—not a smirk, and neither without an edge of irony, but by far her most vivid expression of the conversation. Through his night-vision goggles, he regarded her almost hungrily, her face lighting up like Coruscant at night. It wasn't desire, though, so much as admiration; not love of her so much as of what he saw in her. Her eyes, for just past five years now, had been the blue of fogged-over sea glass rather than crystal, but the same fire burnt behind them. And the scar—the scar, he knew, only improved it. Her scar was the mark of a warrior, a tattoo of the war she'd won. Marred or not, by all of Canderous's definitions, she was beautiful to watch.

But best was her grin itself. He savored it, watching her lips twist open: not a happy expression, but one of determination, of fierce, blazing _intent_.

The flame he saw in her face wasn't eagerness, but necessity, and he knew that. He understood it, too. Necessity kept her on her feet half the time, and it was necessity that kept him by her side almost his every waking moment. That wasn't optional. Being themselves simply came with duties.

But the glint of excitement there as well, the same one she could see reflected in his spirit, if not his eyes? That was all her own, and of all the traits in a leader, there couldn't have been one Canderous would rather have seen.

"Let's go," said Ashi, turning on her heel.

And before anyone noticed the strange set of four—a warrior, an exile, a murderer, and the most famous face in the galaxy—they had gone. After all, they had a job to do now. Whatever was out there was coming now, and soon.

So their job was to make _damn_ sure that—whatever it was—it got what it came for.

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**I can't thank you guys enough for reading, whether you've been there since the beginning or only just found this story. Everyone who's reviewed, you've all inspired me. Yep, I'm getting corny, but I did just finish my first story**—**I feel it can be justified.**

**So. Thanks to everyone, especially the consistent reviewers (you know who you are). You guys are the best. Thanks for reading**—**and reviews are always, always appreciated! (Note: deleting the A/N a few chapters ago made this chapter 34, so people who reviewed last time may not be able to this time. Anonymous reviews still work, though!)**

**So. Thanks for everything, guys, and most of all for reading.  
**

—**skrybble o_O  
**


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